I'm Too Sexy
I'm just way too sexy for my own damned good!
Wait, that wasn't sexy... how about this? Frankly I don't see the big appeal of Pam Anderson, but I know what you guys like! :P
Here's an interesting story. I always wondered about this! So I guess you can be charged for pedophilia, even if the pictures are of yourself. Who knew? Actually, my Storymaster knew. I was asking him a stupid hypothetical question about it the other day (for those of you who've chatted with me, you know I'm prone to stupid hypotheticals). Anyway, he was right. Now it's not so funny.
Okay, I've been beating around the bush for long enough. Here's what happened last night, and why I'm too sexy for my own good.
Star and I went out, like I said we would. She didn't work last night, so she came over and brought me shoes-shopping. And yes, to the person who posted that comment about clear heels? I now have cleer heeled stilletos! Actually, they're more of the platform shoe variety than the stilletto variety, and they're not totally clear. They're pinkish, in fact, but you can see through them. They kind of look like this... I just spent five minutes searching for an exact picture, but I can't find one. It's always so heartbreaking when Google fails you! :(
They literally add five inches to my height, and boy, do they stretch out the calves! I went jogging earlier this morning (my punishment for drinking late last night), and I can't remember the last time I jogged where my calves hurt so bad. And I wore the stupid things for only about twenty minutes yesterday! If you want to know what it feels like, walk around on your tippy-toes for a while, only make sure not to relax at all... and try not to fall over.
So, I have my stripper shoes. I'm going to actually do it. I'm going to do the amateur night thing. I know that a lot of you are concerned about this from your comments posted here and in the forum, but I've decided to give it a try at least. I mean, what's the worst that can happen? I get embarrassed and stop right away? Shrugs.
I'm hoping I end up liking it, though. Because seriously, the job market out there? Not good. I have sent out over three dozen resumes in the last week, and not one phone call has been returned. Since I started job hunting I've been called in for one interview, and didn't get the job. I've searched monster.com, the local newspaper, all that... zilch. Who does a girl have to blow to get a decent job anyway?!?
I blame this man. What a miserable failure, huh?
Moving on... last night, after we got the shoes, Star and I went to this little bar she loves for some weird reason. It's sort of a redneck bar and for the life of me I can't figure out why she likes the place... except that the beer is pretty cheap. Anyway, we drank a bit and chatted. She asked me about Leo, whether or not I was "into" him.
What could I say? I told the truth. I said that he seemed really nice, but that I hardly knew him and that I wasn't exactly looking for a relationship right now anyway. She understood, and also told me that Frank had told her that he thought Leo and I were fucking. I just laughed at this and changed the subject.
Do you have any idea how bad I feel now about what I did on Sunday? I feel like total shit. Last night I felt so bad, you have no idea. I mean, I want to be honest with Star, but I can't be honest with her. I can't say, "Yes, I've fucked Leo... Frank ought to know since a few minutes after that I was fucking him, too." God.
I hate guilt. When is Pfizer going to invent an anti-guilt pill?
The funny thing is that if I had only fucked Frank, I might actually confess to her. It'd be hard, but I know me-- the guilt would eat me alive until I finally told her. But I can't tell her, because it wasn't just Frank. I mean, can you imagine? How could I tell her that I fucked Frank and his brother Leo, Chris, and Mack, all in the same hour period? How do I confess that? She sees me as this little wholesome girl to be taken under her wing and helped through a rough time in my life. God.
I have a cool new friend, not the brightest in the world but really nice and generous, who wants to help me out. It'd be perfect if I hadn't acted so stupid on Sunday. See why I'm too sexy for my own girl? If I looked like this I wouldn't have these problems.
That was mean... I should delete that link. Who am I to judge that woman? She probably doesn't fuck her best friend, his brother, and two other people in the same afternoon.
So, my plans for tonight are pretty boring. Paul and I are supposed to go see that movie, Team America. I don't know what to make of his invitation this morning, by the way. He specifically invited me... he didn't ask if I wanted to join him and Stupidslut, his new girlfriend. I don't know.
Okay, gotta run. Bye!
-shannon-
Wait, that wasn't sexy... how about this? Frankly I don't see the big appeal of Pam Anderson, but I know what you guys like! :P
Here's an interesting story. I always wondered about this! So I guess you can be charged for pedophilia, even if the pictures are of yourself. Who knew? Actually, my Storymaster knew. I was asking him a stupid hypothetical question about it the other day (for those of you who've chatted with me, you know I'm prone to stupid hypotheticals). Anyway, he was right. Now it's not so funny.
Okay, I've been beating around the bush for long enough. Here's what happened last night, and why I'm too sexy for my own good.
Star and I went out, like I said we would. She didn't work last night, so she came over and brought me shoes-shopping. And yes, to the person who posted that comment about clear heels? I now have cleer heeled stilletos! Actually, they're more of the platform shoe variety than the stilletto variety, and they're not totally clear. They're pinkish, in fact, but you can see through them. They kind of look like this... I just spent five minutes searching for an exact picture, but I can't find one. It's always so heartbreaking when Google fails you! :(
They literally add five inches to my height, and boy, do they stretch out the calves! I went jogging earlier this morning (my punishment for drinking late last night), and I can't remember the last time I jogged where my calves hurt so bad. And I wore the stupid things for only about twenty minutes yesterday! If you want to know what it feels like, walk around on your tippy-toes for a while, only make sure not to relax at all... and try not to fall over.
So, I have my stripper shoes. I'm going to actually do it. I'm going to do the amateur night thing. I know that a lot of you are concerned about this from your comments posted here and in the forum, but I've decided to give it a try at least. I mean, what's the worst that can happen? I get embarrassed and stop right away? Shrugs.
I'm hoping I end up liking it, though. Because seriously, the job market out there? Not good. I have sent out over three dozen resumes in the last week, and not one phone call has been returned. Since I started job hunting I've been called in for one interview, and didn't get the job. I've searched monster.com, the local newspaper, all that... zilch. Who does a girl have to blow to get a decent job anyway?!?
I blame this man. What a miserable failure, huh?
Moving on... last night, after we got the shoes, Star and I went to this little bar she loves for some weird reason. It's sort of a redneck bar and for the life of me I can't figure out why she likes the place... except that the beer is pretty cheap. Anyway, we drank a bit and chatted. She asked me about Leo, whether or not I was "into" him.
What could I say? I told the truth. I said that he seemed really nice, but that I hardly knew him and that I wasn't exactly looking for a relationship right now anyway. She understood, and also told me that Frank had told her that he thought Leo and I were fucking. I just laughed at this and changed the subject.
Do you have any idea how bad I feel now about what I did on Sunday? I feel like total shit. Last night I felt so bad, you have no idea. I mean, I want to be honest with Star, but I can't be honest with her. I can't say, "Yes, I've fucked Leo... Frank ought to know since a few minutes after that I was fucking him, too." God.
I hate guilt. When is Pfizer going to invent an anti-guilt pill?
The funny thing is that if I had only fucked Frank, I might actually confess to her. It'd be hard, but I know me-- the guilt would eat me alive until I finally told her. But I can't tell her, because it wasn't just Frank. I mean, can you imagine? How could I tell her that I fucked Frank and his brother Leo, Chris, and Mack, all in the same hour period? How do I confess that? She sees me as this little wholesome girl to be taken under her wing and helped through a rough time in my life. God.
I have a cool new friend, not the brightest in the world but really nice and generous, who wants to help me out. It'd be perfect if I hadn't acted so stupid on Sunday. See why I'm too sexy for my own girl? If I looked like this I wouldn't have these problems.
That was mean... I should delete that link. Who am I to judge that woman? She probably doesn't fuck her best friend, his brother, and two other people in the same afternoon.
So, my plans for tonight are pretty boring. Paul and I are supposed to go see that movie, Team America. I don't know what to make of his invitation this morning, by the way. He specifically invited me... he didn't ask if I wanted to join him and Stupidslut, his new girlfriend. I don't know.
Okay, gotta run. Bye!
-shannon-
Labels: stuff about me
posted by Shannon at 1:51 PM
1 Comments:
Actually Shannon, those were exactly the kind of shoes I was talking about. I don't know how it came to be but they seem to be part of the offical stipper uniform at some point. I have been told by people that you get more used to them after a while so just hope it is sooner than later. I know how you feel about having to keep a secret like that from a friend. Not exactly the same way it happened with you, but sleeping with your friends "special someone" (in my case it was his GF) isn't the best choice of things to do. All you can do is hope it never comes out and be prepared if it does.
As for the movie, maybe he just wanted to see the movie & SS was too busy to go. Maybe be thought you might like it & she wouldn't so he didn't ask her. COuld be any number of things. Just go & enjoy the movie. It's pretty funny. Have fun.
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