Bad Month
This has not been a good month. Here's a list of the top-ten things that have gone wrong so far...
#10: My site (ffstories.com) went down for some reason, prompting a ton of ppl to e-mail me their goodbyes. I tried hard to let everyone know I was still around after spending hours revamping this (original) version of the site, but to no avail. Just today I received six more e-mails from people saying goodbye because they think I'm gone!
#9: My computer got infected with a virus. I actually think this happened last month, but this month it really hit hard. I was having trouble connecting to YiM, or Hello, or any online-based software. The computer kept freezing up. I was afraid I'd have to wipe my harddrive and reload everything...
#8: ...but then I called Ira. Ira is the guy who, for years, has helped me whenever I have computer problems! The only problem with Ira is that he expects... well, sex, frankly... in return for his help. Why? Because he always finds my porn when he's working on my computer, and he's not shy about telling me when he does. And when he sees all the porn I have he understandably thinks I'm some kind of 24-hour-go-go-slut. The first couple of times he made advances on me because of his "discoveries" I resisted, but about three years ago I learned that it's just easier to give in. This last time was just like the others, only I felt dirtier than usual after all was said and done. On the bright side, my computer is working fine now!
#7: My closest friend, Laura, found out about my "side-business". We were at a bar having a total blast when my prepaid cell phone rang while I was in the bathroom. Well, I thought she'd already left so I answered it (I was in the stall-- pants were up already, btw!). She heard me say something like, "Yes, 6pm tomorrow is good... yes, I have a few acts, we can go over them... no, only during the dances, otherwise I keep my thong on...". She, of course, grilled me later about what the call had been about, and I told her the truth. Now? Well, she said that night that she didn't think less of me, but... she just doesn't act the same toward me anymore right now, you know?
#6: Speaking of my side-business, I've pulled my ads for the time being. It's just gotten so slow lately that it's not worth the expense! I think I'll put them back up in January and see if things have picked up, but right now... well, my last party is this Saturday, and it's going to be the first I've had since late November. Hopefully it will cover the last few weeks of ad-charges, but who knows? Sigh...
#5: I think my car is breaking down. I know less about cars than I do about computers, even, and I've never had a car break down since I've never had a car until recently, so I'm terrfied. A gearhead friend of mine thinks it might be the transmission, which he says could cost up to $600 to fix. Ouch!!! He said he'll come over and take a look at it for me later in the week, though. Thankfully he's gay (yes, a gay gearhead, he's heard all the jokes, too!) so I doubt I'll have to pay him the way I pay Ira (besides, I don't keep porn in my car! :P ).
#4: For some stupid reason I thought I might be getting a promotion at my "real" job. I don't know why I let my heart get set on things like that... anyway, I found out just today that someone else got the bump.
#3: I had to have a physical for my job. I was supposed to have it when I started, but I never did-- but since the year is ending, they need to get everyone's paperwork in order over in HR and they noticed the lack of a physical. Anyway, I hate physicals. I hate doctors. They remind me of terrible things and I hate, HATE them. Sigh. Thankfully I'm in great health, apparently, but still.
#2: My psychiatrist is moving to Arizona. ARIZONA! I've been seeing her (on and off... mostly off the last year b/c of insurance reasons, but anyway) for years, and she just told me she's moving away. She's referring me a "trust colleage". If I didn't need my meds so much I wouldn't bother seeing anyone else... I still might not. I don't know.
#1: FFStories officially did go down. But you should already know all about that.
Not a good month. I hate this time of year. I hate that it's almost 2006. Where did the last twelve months go, guys?!?
-shannon-
#10: My site (ffstories.com) went down for some reason, prompting a ton of ppl to e-mail me their goodbyes. I tried hard to let everyone know I was still around after spending hours revamping this (original) version of the site, but to no avail. Just today I received six more e-mails from people saying goodbye because they think I'm gone!
#9: My computer got infected with a virus. I actually think this happened last month, but this month it really hit hard. I was having trouble connecting to YiM, or Hello, or any online-based software. The computer kept freezing up. I was afraid I'd have to wipe my harddrive and reload everything...
#8: ...but then I called Ira. Ira is the guy who, for years, has helped me whenever I have computer problems! The only problem with Ira is that he expects... well, sex, frankly... in return for his help. Why? Because he always finds my porn when he's working on my computer, and he's not shy about telling me when he does. And when he sees all the porn I have he understandably thinks I'm some kind of 24-hour-go-go-slut. The first couple of times he made advances on me because of his "discoveries" I resisted, but about three years ago I learned that it's just easier to give in. This last time was just like the others, only I felt dirtier than usual after all was said and done. On the bright side, my computer is working fine now!
#7: My closest friend, Laura, found out about my "side-business". We were at a bar having a total blast when my prepaid cell phone rang while I was in the bathroom. Well, I thought she'd already left so I answered it (I was in the stall-- pants were up already, btw!). She heard me say something like, "Yes, 6pm tomorrow is good... yes, I have a few acts, we can go over them... no, only during the dances, otherwise I keep my thong on...". She, of course, grilled me later about what the call had been about, and I told her the truth. Now? Well, she said that night that she didn't think less of me, but... she just doesn't act the same toward me anymore right now, you know?
#6: Speaking of my side-business, I've pulled my ads for the time being. It's just gotten so slow lately that it's not worth the expense! I think I'll put them back up in January and see if things have picked up, but right now... well, my last party is this Saturday, and it's going to be the first I've had since late November. Hopefully it will cover the last few weeks of ad-charges, but who knows? Sigh...
#5: I think my car is breaking down. I know less about cars than I do about computers, even, and I've never had a car break down since I've never had a car until recently, so I'm terrfied. A gearhead friend of mine thinks it might be the transmission, which he says could cost up to $600 to fix. Ouch!!! He said he'll come over and take a look at it for me later in the week, though. Thankfully he's gay (yes, a gay gearhead, he's heard all the jokes, too!) so I doubt I'll have to pay him the way I pay Ira (besides, I don't keep porn in my car! :P ).
#4: For some stupid reason I thought I might be getting a promotion at my "real" job. I don't know why I let my heart get set on things like that... anyway, I found out just today that someone else got the bump.
#3: I had to have a physical for my job. I was supposed to have it when I started, but I never did-- but since the year is ending, they need to get everyone's paperwork in order over in HR and they noticed the lack of a physical. Anyway, I hate physicals. I hate doctors. They remind me of terrible things and I hate, HATE them. Sigh. Thankfully I'm in great health, apparently, but still.
#2: My psychiatrist is moving to Arizona. ARIZONA! I've been seeing her (on and off... mostly off the last year b/c of insurance reasons, but anyway) for years, and she just told me she's moving away. She's referring me a "trust colleage". If I didn't need my meds so much I wouldn't bother seeing anyone else... I still might not. I don't know.
#1: FFStories officially did go down. But you should already know all about that.
Not a good month. I hate this time of year. I hate that it's almost 2006. Where did the last twelve months go, guys?!?
-shannon-
Labels: stuff about me
posted by Shannon at 1:02 AM
19 Comments:
Shannon:
Thanks for the storries, and everything! you will not loose me from your reading even if this blog goes down, i'd keep wondering what happened, but i'll still want to find you =) I love your stories... I hope everything works out. a couple of things (my opinion only!)
1) do not stop seeing that shrink that you're being refered to, your meds obviously have stabalized out and they should be taken until the dr. says not to.
2) chin up, it's coming to the end of the year. =) make sure you change your engine oil ever 3000 miles, and take good care of your car it'll last a long time.
3) (ok i decided on another) you're friend will come around, she may tease you about the side buisness but you can always find something to jab her with in a joking manner... hehehe You'll find she comes back to her old self soon!
all in all you're a lovely person, and I'm still wondering if the pics you posted recently were you or not but i'm still here for better or worse.
Fenris
It saddens me that people are leaving because they think yo9u are gone. Your sites have come and gone over the past few years, I would think they would know better than this.
I am pulling for you. You are a great person and though crappy things have happened recently, I know you can pull ahead of them.
~los
Ive sent you a few emails and you havent emailed me back.
Whats up?
Bad month indeed....
Mistress Shannon,
Sorry to hear about all the shit pile that's been your life lately. I know what it's like to say to yourself, "Where did the last twelve months go," I'm there myself.
As for your side business, it will pick up in few months. Whether its temping, tourism, or hiring full time employees, they all suffer a slowdowns at the end of the year, and you are feeling the side effects. Have you tried calling up your former clients? You might be able to get some business.
I wish you well, and I know its hard, but have a Merry Christmas.
Kurtie
I've been reading your sites since almost the beginning. How anybody could give up that quickly is beyond me. Your real fans would follow you anywhere in the internent, probably anywhere in the real world too if we had the chance ;)
Yeah, this last month does look like it's sucked. But, things can only get better. Although I'm sure the FBI should have better things to be doing than closing down legal fiction-based websites. Wasn't there supposed to be a war on terror or something?
Anyway, hope it all gets sorted out soon. Best wishes.
Andy J
You are a slut, shannon. So, what's wrong about Ira? Let him see all the new porn on your hd. He knows anyway. Serve him well, and maybe he knows also how to fix up the stuff with your DNS problems.
Hey Shannon
I'll keep following you around the internet until all there is is a page with a picture of you holding a sign saying "Shannon". Sorry your life has gone to shit....I can totally relate. Best wishes for a better New Year!
Jesus Christ Woman!
You know I have nothing but respect and admiration for you and the sites you create, and what you represent.... So please take what I'm about to say in the context of a FRIEND giving a bit of "tough love"...
But get over it!
I have seen you place a huge amount of energy through the years concentrating on the bad things that happen in life. Well darling, they happen to the best of us.
Its about time you held your head up, and DID something positive to affirm your life.
Why not post a list of everything thats gone RIGHT this year?
thunderer
finally. some brilliant advice.
I'll stick by you Shannon. Even here.
JD The Red
Hey... Just stopped by after a long time away, sorry about the problems! :-(
Macintosh is god by the way. Give in to the dark side!
Hi Shannon,
I have seen your site for some time and have enjoyed your stories and I believe many of us don't know how you also have your ups and downs...we are cought up in our own worlds and ...there are some good things in your life...the fans who stick by you, those of us who care for you, many on the comments have said some wise things...take care of your car, take care of yourself.
I do wish you happy holidays.
Take care
Sincerely,
Richard
well i'm the new guy on the block but i do want to second the thunderer's idea. make a list or at lest look at what is going good (shot what is going all right). there is always something bad/discouraging/annoying happening that is life. but you can not let your self become bogged down in the setbacks small or large.
a piece of practical advice, you might want to find a new IT guy. ya it's easer said than done and the underling problem of finding the porn will still be there, but frankly this guy is taking advantage of you. i don't know what he is to you but it shouldn't be "easier" to give in to him than to tell him to fuck off.
well that was a little verbose
regards Matt (aka walkerhound)
Shannon,
Just happened along looking for some good erotica, and read your December 13 blog. I'm sorry to hear that things aren't going well. I too take meds to make me a more stable person. I've been on my meds (Paroxetine) for several years now. In the beginning I saw three different psychiatrists... none of them helped me. The first one called me on the phone, when I didn't show for an appointment. He asked me what was wrong, and I told him that psychiatry(sic) wasn't what I expected. I told him I thought he'd ask more questions of me, and give me meds. He then started me on the meds.
Prozac was first on the trial list. He gave me a months supply (or rather my doctor gave them to me on the other guy's recommendation), and I took them for a while. But, I stopped seeing the psychiatrist. I reasoned that I couldn't take the drugs if I didn't also go see the psychiatrists guy. So I stopped taking them.
I'm sorry to be so long winded, but here's the point I've been trying to get to: I called the man in a cold sweat one day because I thought I might hurt myself, and he asked if I was taking the pills. I told him they didn't seem to work, and that I thought maybe I shouldn't take them if I wasn't also in therapy. He told me that idea was preposterous. If the meds would help me then I should take them.
Well, I went back to my doctor and tried several different meds until I found the one that worked for me. My point is, screw the psychiatrist. Don't let that keep you from getting and taking the meds you need. Your regular run-of-the-mill primary care physician can give you the meds you need and help you adjust your dosage.
The unfortunate "sexual" side effects are that I can't always get it up, and even if I do manage to have the physical response (read: a stiffy), most times I can't feel anything... but that a trade off that I gladly make so that the other areas of my life are more stable.
Man, can I talk or what? Well if you're still with me here. Please get your meds, and take them regardless of if you're seeing a psychiatrist... I suppose that advice doesn't go for anti-psychotics... I'm just bi-polar with a heavy dose of the depression part of that senario.
Anyway, take care of you... you sound like a very nice girl and deserve to be happy. Don't listen to folks who *just* say to "get over it"... yes, you need to get over it, but part of that process for you, may be to vent in your blog and have a few folks assure you that they love you and will stand by you. That's what enables some people to "get over it"... sometimes they just need someone to listen and give them a pat on the back or a hug and be reminded that it will get better and that you're not alone.
Take care of you,
-Gizmoguy
oh, and order your drugs from Canada... my doctor, bless him, will even fax my prescription directly to Canada for me! Now that's what I call service. :) I get a three month supply for a couple hundred... that's less than my insurance company would pay for a one month perscription. Bush really screwed us on perscription drug benefits. Darn him! :)
Always been a big fan of your work and was kind of freaked when I couldn't check in and read my weekly Forbidden Fantasy, good to see I finally found your site!
I can definately understand having a shitty month, but DAMN! that is the month from hell right there.. Hope 2006 is treating you better.
Always a fan,
David
Yahoooooooooo I found you again.I thought that I had lost you forever this time.This makes my week to have found you again.
Hey Shannon,
Long time. Yes I know is been pretty rough for you too.. I miss the forums and all. Been going through a lot myself sence i had to suddenly leave the forums over a year ago. I came back breifly and was just getting into your second story when everything went poof...
Oh well. Keep your head up and I will try my best to stay in touch
Love ya
Friends always
Erotic Tiger
PS drop me an email sometime ?? its still Forgeknight@yahoo.com
Post a Comment
<< Home