Introduction

Most people know me as Trevor Hawk, or just Hawk because my real last name is Hawkinson. I have used other stage names, such as Hawk Boy, Boy Hawk, and T-Hawk. Hi, my name is Trevor, and I'm twelve.

***

My life growing up in London was amazing and wonderful until I was six. That's when it all fell apart. Mum and Dad got divorced, Mum freaked out and cried all the time, she started drinking every day, being mean to me, and then she started ignoring me like everything was my fault. I guess it was in some ways. I mean, I'm not the perfect kid. My brother Ian was. He was the blue-eyed, blond boy she always wanted, and she adored him, even when he misbehaved–especially when he misbehaved. I guess I was just Ian's little brother to her, but as my press agent Bill says, I rose above it all.

Over the last few years, I've become one of the most successful and prolific child-porn actors in the business. I don't need to ride in the back of Mum's boyfriend's dirty old Morris Robin anymore. I've got three cars and my own driver on call, standing by to take me anywhere, whether Mum likes it or not. My driver has a room in the domestic employees' house next to the garage. A woman named Svetlana also lives in that house. She comes in every day to clean my room and do my other chores. I also have a guy named Yves, who brings me my new clothes every week. Once I wear an outfit, I usually donate it to poor kids.

Ian hates it because he doesn't get cool new clothes, and he has to watch me walk around in the latest designs and then give them to someone else the next week. I would give them to him, but they wouldn't fit him, and he's anything but sexy. He's taller and a year older than me. I also have a tutor named Marie, who gives me lessons three days each week. She also accompanies me when I travel; she says I'm doing tenth-grade work now.

My solicitor arranged things so I could have our new house built on Lake Minnetonka in Minnesota when I was ten. Of course, Mum had to agree to let me have the master bedroom because it's my house, technically held in trust by the studio I'm contracted with, the whole basement, and the garage to myself. She didn't mind because now she doesn't have to pay rent or see any more of that asshole Pentecostal Christian caretaker who liked beating on "other people's children," as she always put it.

I needed the garage for my cars a Benz, a Land Rover, and a mint condition 1973 Jaguar E-type convertible with that lovely V-12 engine. Mum parks the Smart Car I bought her under the carport I had installed next to the garage. It has my latest publicity photo painted on the two doors, along with logos and other graphics from the studio. That was part of the deal for me to buy the car for her. The other part of the deal was that she had to blow into a tube before the engine would start. That tested her breath to see if she'd been drinking.

My solicitor insisted on it because she's had such a horrible drinking problem for so long now. Mum had a right fit when she found out! But she's been good about her drinking for some time now. That's why I feel good about supporting her and Ian. The money is nothing to me, but I can't be around her when she's drinking. She's only my mum in name as well. My agent, Randy Christianson, is my legal guardian. Mum signed her parental rights away when she signed my first contract with the studio, and he continues to be my legal guardian in Minnesota. He will be until I'm an adult. Mum challenged Randy's guardianship in court, but she showed up drunk and lost all parental rights to me permanently. She even lost her beloved Ian until she demonstrated to the UK courts that she could stay sober for a year. He wanted to go back to her; I didn't.

Of the vehicles I own, my favorite is my Citation jet. I had a runway and a hangar built next to the house, and I have a few pilots who rotate being on call for me. One of them is named Marvin Jarvis, and he came to Minnesota with me from the UK. I can be anywhere I want to be in a matter of hours. Still, ocean crossings are difficult because we would need several refueling stops, so I use a jet service or fly first class on an airline, which is usually more fun than a private jet if I'm going overseas. I visit California frequently. The film production company I contract with has film studios in Burbank and La Jolla. I also like to go on shopping trips to Manhattan.

We designed the basement to be an in-house sound and film production facility. There is a private theater with a thrust stage and a twelve-foot UHD video screen on the ground floor, which Mum and Ian are not allowed to enter without permission from my agent. Now I shoot nearly all of my videos at home, and from time to time, we perform privately in the theater for big shots in the industry or for people who can afford my fee, which right now stands at $85,000 plus additional fees for the other performers. Mostly, these are very wealthy men who would rather go somewhere a little classier than Thailand or Hungary.

I never charge to have sex with audience members, but I only do that if I feel like it and if my agent has cleared them. They sometimes offer me money, but I'm horny, not a whore. Sometimes I do small fashion shows there too for new designers. Of course, there are many other models too when we do those.

It's not as if Mum and Ian are giving up anything by letting me have the basement, half of the ground floor, the largest bedroom, and the garage. Our new living room alone is larger than our whole flat was a few years ago. Mum and Ian have big bedrooms with walk-in closets, and Svetlana inspects them each week to make sure they're kept in order, according to our contract. Ian HATES that! I almost had to evict Mum after letting the house fall into a disastrous state while she was on a drinking binge. That's why we began these weekly inspections by Svetlana, and she is thorough.

Mum and Ian now live in a safe, lovely neighborhood with excellent security on the grounds and a decent school system for Ian. I won't pay tuition for a private school for Ian unless we can find one that has uniforms with embarrassingly short shorts, or that will allow him to wear them, which he would be required to do until the day he graduated. He declined private school. I don't think he could handle the coursework; to be honest, he's not very bright.

Mum and Ian do not have to do any work outside, and I will always pay to have her car serviced and repaired as needed, as long as she keeps my publicity photo and graphics on the car. I even pay for her gas as long as she hands out my publicity photos to other customers at the filling station.

Life as a wealthy and famous boy has been good, and the story of how it all happened is worth telling. At least it's worth writing down. I have a lot of fans, and maybe they'd like to know me better. Perhaps some kids reading this are considering a career in child porn, and they'd like to learn about the business. Whatever your reason for reading this, I hope you enjoy it!

Chapter 1
Brad

So how did a poor boy like me rise to stardom? The same way everyone else does– hard work and a lot of good luck. Well, I couldn't have had the good luck without first having a lot of bad luck. Can I help it if I LOVE my work? I think everyone should pick a job they love; then you never have to work. You go to your job every day and enjoy yourself. That's what Granddad always used to say. Maybe I shouldn't call it hard work.

Really, it was a matter of having a lot of incredible sex with many incredibly sexy boys and men with cameras pointed at me, and things rather took off. Having the opportunity to do that was a matter of good luck. My agent says I've always been a natural. I did have a few skills you wouldn't expect in such a young boy when I began my career.

Well, here's what happened. When I was six, and Ian was seven, we had a sitter named Brad. Mum had to work during the daytime after Dad left, so Brad stayed with us all day during the summer holidays and then after school until Mum came home at eight o'clock. He was a world-class turd, but Mum had a hard time finding good sitters. I complain a lot about her, but she did try, bless her.

Brad was fourteen. He smoked cigarettes in our apartment. He said all of the words Mum didn't allow us to say nearly the whole time she was away. One day he had two of his mates over, Chris and Jordan, and they both smoked also. So did Gran and Granddad, and so did most of the grown-ups I knew except for Mum.

What got me excited about cigarettes was how much grown-ups liked them, and how hard they tried to keep us, kids, from having them. They would say how badly they needed them and how good it felt when they smoked them, but if they were so good, why couldn't we enjoy the odd puff as well? It was as if the grown-ups were continually telling us that they were so much better than us kids, so much more important than us, that they wanted all the cigarettes for themselves. It wasn't fair, and I wanted to know why–what the big deal was.

So I told Brad that I wanted a cigarette. Of course, he said no, just like all the grown-ups. I thought of him as a grown-up too, even though Mum called him a boy. That didn't make sense to me. Boys were little, and Brad was as tall as Mum. Teenagers were big and strong, and they could beat me up easily, so they were grown-ups.

I pestered Brad, and after a while, Ian joined in. Then Brad said, "You can have a cigarette if you suck Jordan's willy." Awesome! I was finally going to get a whole cigarette! I was so happy!

I went over to Jordan and grabbed his zip. He seemed to freak out, and I could imagine why. It's so embarrassing to have other people looking at your willy. A few seconds passed. Then Jordan said we should go into the bathroom to be alone, and no one would see us. That made sense to me because we weren't supposed to be naked at home unless we were in the bathroom or our bedroom, and that way, it would just be me looking at his willy. It's how little kids think. Well, it was how I felt.

So we went into the bathroom, closed the door, and Jordan leaned back against the sink. This time he let me undo his zip, unbutton his jeans, and pull his underpants down. I couldn't believe it! It was what everyone in the whole world was spending their lives trying to do– getting naked with someone else and playing with the parts that the swimsuit covers. I was only six, and I felt proud! I had done what grown-ups everywhere were trying to do. I could play with someone else's willy, and he was much older than I was. That made it even better!

I had never seen one so huge! And it had dark hair growing out of the skin just above it. His willy was all floppy when I started, but it got thicker and less floppy right away. I realize now that it was a small boy penis like most other boys just getting into puberty just like Chris and Brad, but to me, it was a monster!

I sucked it quite hard and deep, and after half a minute or so, Jordan peed in my mouth. That's what I thought it was when I was six. Not a whole lot, but enough to tell me I had done my job well and that I had earned my cigarette. I just swallowed it without thinking. It was only a small bit of pee, and I didn't want to think about it, or I might have become a little disgusted. Why worry about that? My body made all kinds of pee every day, so this little bit wouldn't hurt me. I was a bit excited when that happened; I'll never forget the taste. There's nothing in the world that tastes like cum, which today I realize was what Jordan and I both thought was pee on that day.

Jordan told me I should stop. I became a bit upset because I finally got to play with someone else's willy, and now he was taking that away from me. I pouted out of the bathroom with Jordan following me. He told everyone I'd sucked the pee right out of him, and they all seemed impressed. That made me feel proud.

When we got to the living room, Ian was sucking on Chris, and right away, Chris told him he should stop too. Then, right there in the living room, Brad un-snapped and unbuttoned his jeans and told me that, if I wanted to, I could suck his willy.

I went at it right away, but only a few seconds later, Brad also told me to stop. He hadn't peed in my mouth. I had only done it for a few seconds. Why would he want to stop so soon? I thought it was because once I started sucking, he knew I was doing it wrong. They could all tell that I didn't know what I was doing because I was just a stupid little kid. Today I think they were all just fucking with me, and maybe Brad wasn't sure if he wanted to go through with it yet, but then I felt hurt. I thought I could give the teenagers something they wanted, and that would make them my friends.

Brad said that instead of sucking his willy, I should kiss Ian. What? Yeah, I didn't understand either, but I wanted to make sure I got my cigarette, so I kissed Ian's cheek.

"On the lips," said Brad.

"Ok," I said. This wasn't a problem for a boy like me. I kissed Gran and Granddad Jones on the lips every time we visited them. So I kissed Ian.

Brad said, "That's not how you kiss! You need to lick each other's tongues!"

That was a little gross, but we did it for maybe half a minute or so; we wanted our cigarettes.

Then Brad surprised me. He said that both Ian and I could have TWO cigarettes each if we ass-fucked. I didn't know what that meant, but Brad explained that it meant sticking your willy into someone else's bottom.

Well, this was something different. I had no idea why someone would want to see two kids doing that or anyone else for that matter. We had to show all of them our own willies and asses naked, and that wasn't all. Brad said we had to take off all our clothes in front of them and be completely naked. Ian and I looked at each other. I could tell he was as nervous as I was about being naked in front of all of them, but we wanted our cigarettes. We pulled our shirts off, and then our shorts and socks. It was ok to be seen wearing only our undies, so I wasn't scared yet.

When it came time to drop our undies, Brad pointed his camera and took photos of us. I stopped and looked at him.

"Go on. Don't be frightened," he said. "You are two very handsome boys, and these pictures will look lovely."

I wasn't frightened; I was nervous. I was going to be naked in front of Brad and his friends, which made me nervous. Would they laugh? I loved having my picture taken, and Brad thought I was handsome. I giggled nervously as I slid my undies down and let them drop to the floor. I threw my hands up and said, "Ta-da!" Something good became mixed in with the nervousness, and it turned into a thrill. I have been chasing that thrill ever since.

Brad and his friends clapped for us as we put our clothes aside, and then we got to business. First, I ass-fucked Ian on the couch. Then Ian ass-fucked me. Brad took a few pictures of us ass fucking, and if you search carefully, you can still find them online. I liked it when Ian ass-fucked me. I didn't know what it was, but it felt nice to have something poking inside me. It took a long time for him to get his willy all the way in I know, lube? What's that then? but once it was in, it felt like Ian was scratching an itch that I didn't know I had. Something like that, I guess I had an itchy bottom.

Chris pulled me from the couch and said he was going to ass-fuck me. Ian's willy felt nice, but he was a seven-year-old boy, and his willy was rather little. The big thing Chris came at me with felt like a cricket bat! It really hurt going in, again, no lube, but then it felt a little nicer because it was bigger. It did a better job of scratching that itch, but it still mostly hurt. We were right in front of Brad, and as Chris ass-fucked me, I tried again to un-zip Brad's pants, and again Brad said no, but only after I'd gotten him un-zipped again with his big willy in my mouth. He took a few more pictures; I've always liked having my picture taken!

Chris came in my ass, but he pulled out right away. I could feel the cum dripping from my bottom, which I still thought was pee. I remembered what Jordan's had tasted like. Without thinking, I reached around, wiped some of it up onto my fingers, and put them in my mouth. It tasted sweet and salty. I wanted to taste every bit of it because I wanted to remember what it was like. I didn't know if I'd ever be able to taste it again.

Chris has started toward the kitchen to wash up, but Brad told him to come back and have me clean him. He'd seen me tasting the cum that was now dripping down my thighs. I looked up and saw how messy his cock was with cum, but I didn't know what it was. It should have been pee, but it looked more like dish soap. Chris and Brad explained to me that men squirt something different from their cocks when they fuck. This confused me, but it explained why Jordan's 'pee' had tasted so good, and why Chris' was even better.

I said, "Oh yes, please! I'll clean you up!"

He'd made much more cum than Jordan had, and it had run down his cock onto his balls when he pulled out, and now the precious and tasty drops were falling to the floor. I hurried over to him, stuck it in my mouth, and started to suck it clean when he gave a yelp and jumped back.

"Gentle boy, gentle!" he said.

So I tried again. Since he was soft and floppy, I could get most of his cock into my mouth. I sucked it until it was perfectly clean. While I was doing that, I had wiped some more dripping cum from my thighs. When I'd finished with his cock, I licked my fingers again. Then I began licking his balls clean. I felt around my bum for more cum, but there wasn't much. I wanted it all, so I stuck two of my fingers up inside to see if I could find more.

Just then, for some reason, Chris began to get hard again, "Bloody hell Brad, did you see what he just did?" he asked.

So I sucked his cock for a few more minutes and asked him if he wanted to ass-fuck me some more. I turned around on all fours. He stuck it back into my bottom and not slowly or carefully. This time it slid right in because it was still wet in there.

He went in and out, faster and faster, and I felt something strange happening in my ass. He kept going for ten minutes, harder and faster, sometimes turning me over on my back, putting me down on my hands and knees, and my penis and my ass started to feel like they were connected. The longer he went, the deeper he went, and the faster he went, the stronger that feeling grew inside of me.

Even as a professional porn actor, I still can't describe that feeling. I've bottomed many times and had many ass-orgasms since then, but I was older, and it never felt quite the same. As a young boy, things just felt much stronger and harsher.

Brad switched his camera to video mode and started filming us, but at some point, it seemed as if he, Ian, and Jordan had disappeared. Our flat had disappeared. The growing feeling was blocking my senses. It grew and grew until I didn't think I could stand it anymore. I was shaking violently, and I could hear myself shrieking and howling. Then it suddenly felt like my body split into several pieces. My arms gave out entirely, my legs shot into the air, my face hit the floor, I screamed with all my power, not an unusual sound coming from our building in those days, and my ass tried to get away and make this torture end – at least that's what Brad's video shows. I don't remember any of that. I just remember how it felt, and it was anything but torture.

Chris wouldn't let go; he just held on tighter and fucked harder. He pinned me to the floor as my body flailed around. My fists and my knees pounded the floor, and I screamed like an eagle without stopping. He had one arm around my waist and the other around my chest. I couldn't breathe, which only made the feeling stronger.

At last, Chris finally came. He stopped his thrusting, but that feeling didn't go away. If he moved at all, it would make my body flip and jerk again. So, we stayed right there on the floor with his cock inside of me for a few minutes while he caught his breath and I got settled. Then he slid his cock out of my ass very slowly, which still felt quite intense. A howl of pleasure came from me as he did that. This time when he went to the kitchen, I didn't protest. I couldn't; I couldn't move. What had happened just then? It was like this bright light connecting my ass and my cock had grown to fill the whole area between my hips. Soon it had flooded my whole body, and there was this tremendous thunder. Then everything just went weird. I had my first orgasm ever, and it was an ass-orgasm.

I stayed there on my stomach for a long time, feeling every bit of those feelings. This had to be the purpose of living. Nothing else was important then. Eventually, Brad asked if I was ok.

I said, "I think so." He poked around my bum to see if there was any blood. There wasn't, so he thought I was fine.

Brad gave us our two cigarettes each, and I was happy! Then he told us to put our clothes back on. I couldn't believe it! If playing naked was so much fun, then why should we put our clothes on? I wanted to stay naked until just before Mum got home, but Brad made me put my shirt, underpants, socks, and shorts back on.

I liked my cigarettes, but Ian threw up.

***

That was my introduction to sex, and of course, I wanted more. I began playing with my penis at night and found out it was ticklish. I tickled it quite a lot actually, and then I found out that if kept tickling it for a few minutes, it would suddenly become much more ticklish, and I had to stop.

After a few weeks of doing this, I decided to keep going, no matter what, even though I couldn't stand it anymore. I had to do this when Ian wasn't in the room because I knew I'd be making a lot of noise; I didn't want him to know my secret. So one day, I did it, and I did scream. Well, I tried to, but I had my face in my pillow and just grunted loudly, and my body did move about – kinda. It felt as if I kept going, I would die, but in a strange way, that made me want to keep going even more. It was as if I was torturing myself, yet it somehow felt good.

It wasn't nearly as powerful a feeling as my ass-orgasm with Chris, and remembering that experience gave me the courage to carry on. It sounds daft, but that's how I thought about things then.

I masturbated like that quite frequently. First starting about once each week, then increasing to nearly every day, and finally as many as six times a day. When I did it that often I sometimes rubbed my cock raw, and it really hurt, but then it turned me on to keep doing it anyway.

It was almost three years before I could share such pleasures again with another person. I had fantasies about some crazy things, though, like hanging Ian naked off the balcony, being crucified, the circus lady who swings around on a rope having to do her act naked, and me being put in a cage naked above a crowd of onlookers. Not exactly sex fantasies, but I was six. It got me off.

For me, sex was mostly about being naked and being seen naked. There was always a bit of torture and humiliation. Tickling myself felt like something separate, but I couldn't seem to do one without also doing the other, and I didn't know why. Looking back on it, the tickling was, as I've said, quite like torture, and before that day with Brad and his mates, being seen naked was a humiliating experience, so I guess in a way, it makes sense.

Humiliation and torture were what my fantasies were about – what I would call BDSM today. I didn't know there was such a thing as proper sex. I thought we'd just played that day, and some strange experience had happened to me, almost a religious awakening. I did not know other people did such things too.

Having a nice wank, high in a tree, in a public park, completely naked, watching the people below, was my favorite way to pass a Sunday afternoon when I was eight.

Chapter 2
Randy

4:00 PM, Sunday, July 15

I think a lot of people who write stories about boys like me never masturbated before puberty. I've read some weird stories about what happens when young boys cum. They moan in pleasure and cry out, "Don't stop!" Believe me; boys want to stop as soon as it hits. They HAVE to stop, even if they secretly want to keep going.

For me, it was always an intense rush, one that I was never sure I could handle. I sometimes prayed to God to make me strong enough to continue wanking through my orgasm – not just until the orgasm, but all the way through it. It was so much more intense back then, and not entirely pleasant. It was more of a powerful jolt.

Nowadays, it's much smoother, mellower, and VERY pleasing to cum. I only ejaculated that clear liquid for a few weeks last year, and at first, I thought I was leaking pee. I'd forgotten what I'd learned about cum from Brad and Chris, and everyone at the studio seemed to think it was cute that I didn't realize it was cum. They throw a big party for a boy's first on-camera cum shot with gifts and everything. The studio traditionally gives double pay for that scene too, which is a lot of money. My cum got thicker and a sort of gray, milky color after some time, and then it was slippery enough to lube the next lad into the same hole.

***

I thought a lot about being naked and playing naked as we did with Brad and his friends. It was the only thing I thought about when I was alone. I started climbing trees in the park and jacking off in one tree after leaving my clothes in another. It was a thrill to try to get from one tree to the other without anyone seeing me naked. The risk of being exposed is what got me off. That was what led to my career in child pornography.

I got busted one summer day, or so I thought. My briefs, called Y-fronts in Britain, blew down from the other tree one windy July day and landed right on a man's head. It really happened that way. He looked up and down the tree where my shorts and shirt were hanging, and I think he spotted them. His eyes wandered over to the tree where I'd been wanking. I didn't think he'd seen me, but he put my underpants in his pocket and wandered slowly toward my tree. After leaning against the trunk for a few minutes, to my horror, he suddenly started to climb!

I was terrified of being caught naked with no clothes anywhere near me, but being caught was also part of my fantasy. That's why I'd leave my clothes in the other tree so that I couldn't get to them. It made the feelings even stronger to know how wrong it was, and how easily I could have been caught. That was the thrill of it all, but that thrill was gone when it became real. My feelings when it happened weren't sexually thrilling at all; I was frightened!

The man climbed the tree, never looking up at me. I thought a few times that he hadn't seen me – he just liked climbing trees. But when he got to a point about four feet below me, he looked up, smiled kindly, and said, "Hi, I'm Randy!"

I just stared at him in terror and shame as he finished his climb to my level. He said, "I see you like playing naked." I didn't say anything. I just stared at him, trying to keep bent forward so he couldn't see my cock, which was all floppy again.

He asked me how old I was. "Eight," I told him, "almost nine." He asked me how long I'd been playing naked in the trees. "All year, since the last term started," I said, "even in the winter."

Then he asked me if I'd ever played naked with anyone else. I told him about Brad and his friends, which made him smile. It made me just a little excited to remember that day and to talk about it while I was naked in front of a stranger. I'd never actually told a single person about that day. I began to feel a little less frightened; Randy seemed to be a kind man.

"They seriously needed lube," Randy said. "Those guys didn't know what they were doing, and they could have hurt you." Oh yeah, it hurt all right when Chris fucked me, but there were all those nice feelings too.

"Did the older boys suck you off as well?" he asked.

"No," I said to Randy.

He seemed angry when I told him that. He said it was just wrong to have another boy suck your penis without sucking his in return. He said that made Jordan a real prick. I thought about it. It was so much fun sucking Jordan's big cock, and Brad's too. I wondered why they weren't interested when I'd offered them mine.

Then he said, "Do you know what I'm going to do? I'm going to give you what Jordan should have given you. I'll suck your cock like he should have done."

Without waiting for a reply from me, I didn't have one to give him; I really didn't know what to say, but my whole body was tingling just thinking about it, and of course, my little boner provided the only answer Randy needed. He stepped down to a lower branch and put his hand on my thigh, then he pushed my shoulder back gently with his other hand, and quite suddenly started sucking my whole cock, while I leaned back on the branch where I was sitting. He rubbed the skin on my thigh gently, moving slowly around and up to my bum cheek. He let go of my shoulder and held my hand. He didn't move his head up and down like I had to with Jordan, but he sucked with his tongue, moving it in and out, sort of like a baby does with a milk bottle.

I was exploding with all the intense feelings this caused in my head and my cock as well. I wanted everyone to be watching us, but I was really scared of being caught! Randy had already caught me, and that was wonderful! I wanted to suck his cock! I wanted to scream! I wanted him to tie me up and gag me so I couldn't scream! I wanted him to hurt me! I wanted to blow apart like a volcano, and quickly it felt like I did! I heard this screaming sound coming from everywhere, and soon I realized it was coming from me! For the second time in my life, I wanted to be right there where I was, for the rest of my life, this time in a tree with Randy.

He slowed down and looked me in the eyes, with my cock still in his mouth. Any little movement and my legs would shoot up in the air and I'd want to scream again.

It was a windy day, and the leaves in the tree were roaring, but I'd just screamed at the top of my lungs, and a few people heard me and started walking toward our tree. I could see a woman holding a baby, another woman, and a little girl. I told Randy they were coming. He looked around and saw them too. He grinned, handed me my underpants from his pocket, and said, "don't worry; I'll take care of them. I'll get your clothes back too. Just stay here." I didn't want to be anywhere else.

"Trevor," I said to him. "My name's Trevor." I set my underpants down on my stomach and didn't move. I grabbed my cock and just held it. It felt too good to be true. I wasn't sure whether I was alive, or maybe I had fallen from the tree and wound up in heaven. Whatever it was, I wanted to stay there forever.

I could hear one woman calling to Randy, asking if everything was ok. "Yes, that's just my boy up in the tree. He had a hard time with his mum, bad things at home. He's very upset. He's ok, but I think I need to leave him alone for a while. He's good at climbing trees – he'll be fine."

I smiled when I heard all that. I felt so good, Randy was so clever, and something felt nice about hearing him say "my boy." I squeezed my cock and thought to myself that I might never leave that tree again.

About ten minutes later, or maybe a hundred years, I could feel the tree wobbling. I looked down for the first time since Randy left, and I could see him climbing back up with my red shorts and my Arsenal jersey. He handed me my clothes and held me by the legs so I wouldn't fall while I put my shirt on. I had my shoes and socks on already. It makes me feel more naked when I have no clothes on, but I'm wearing shoes, and that makes naked tree climbing more exciting and less hard on the feet as well. I held onto a branch while Randy put my underpants over my shoes and slid them up my legs. He did the same with my shorts. Then I stood up and sort of hugged the tree trunk while he pulled them the rest of the way up, after rubbing my bare bottom with his hand and telling me how beautiful it looked.

I sat back down on my branch, and he said, "We need to talk." So we climbed down the tree and started walking.

***

I want to explain something about the words I'm using. In my business, a cock is always called a cock; a pussy is a pussy, an ass is an ass except in Britain, where it's spelled arse, but usually pronounced the same, and tits are tits. For some reason, shit is called 'brown' when it's not wanted, and 'scat' when it is wanted. No, I do not do scat films.

When I'm doing a scene or talking with people in the business, I use the standard jargon. When I'm writing about things that happened when I was young, I sometimes use the words that I used back then, like willy, penis, bottom, and bum and sometimes cock and ass. I also use the American spelling for everything now because I'm in American schools, and I need to work on developing the habit.

I didn't know what a pussy was called until I was eight. I learned several words for pussy once I was in the business. There was no sex education in biology class for kids my age at the time. I asked Mum once, and she said it's called a girl's bum. I said, "No Mum, I mean in the front." She said it was her bum in the front. I didn't believe her. Mum always got super-embarrassed when I asked about sex and anatomy, so I rarely asked, and her answers were rarely helpful.

I also want to talk about how I write. Mum taught me to read when I was three, and I've always been good at using the correct punctuation. Well, better than most kids my age at least. Commas and periods in quotes still confuse me. I wonder why people have such a hard time understanding that stuff. I'm twelve, and I write well for a boy my age. I also write using a word processor on my laptop, and I leave the spelling and grammar checking on all the time. After I'm done writing, this is all going to go through my literary agent and an editor. I told them that I didn't want any stupid things changed, like my commas, only the embarrassing mistakes. I want people to know I really wrote this, and I'm not perfect.

I don't use a ghostwriter. I did that with my first book, and it was ghastly. Hubert Fletchly, my co-author, set things in order historically, mostly using records from the film studio and other sources, and he was able to write some chapters from the messy notes I left him while I was traveling. That's not a ghostwriter. I'm very proud of how well I write, at least for a twelve-year-old who is learning American spelling and grammar, and I'm not going to write like I'm some dumb kid, even though my publisher wants me to. "Pweathe, may I thuck your wiwwy?"

I also made sure my lawyer would only accept a publishing deal where I had artistic control. That means my editor can add all those stupid phrases like "I shot my hot load from my goo factory into his hungry ass," but it won't go to print unless it's exactly how I want it, and that means no stupid porn clichés.

That's what happened with my first book and the ghostwriter. I thought it was funny at first, but it's not how I want to present myself. I'm smart, which has always been hard to say because it sounds like bragging, but it's true. I'm smart, and I'm not going to let some editor make me sound like an ignorant moron who can only write like a two-year-old porn cliché factory. I've always had top marks in every grammar and writing course I've had, thanks to my tutor Marie. I have loads of fans. I get at least two hundred letters every day from around the world, and I want them to know I'm not stupid, even if I get the odd comma mixed up.

***

Randy and I walked over to an area in the park that had picnic tables. I sat on a table with my feet on the bench, and Randy sat next to me. He put his hand on my thigh; I learned later he loves boy's legs and said, "We do have a lot to talk about." I looked at him and smiled. I put one of my feet on his other side, so I was straddling him.

Just then, a cop came up to us. Neither of us had seen him, and we were both startled. Randy quickly put his arms around me in a hug and said, "It's ok, son. Mum loves you too." Randy was a quick thinker.

The cop gave him a confused look and said, "Sir, may I see some form of identification?"

Randy let go of me, dug his wallet out from his pocket, and handed his driving license to the cop, wiping a real tear from his eye. "The reason I wanted to talk to you today, Mr. Christianson, is that we had a report that you were climbing trees with your boy here. That's not allowed in city parks."

"I'm sorry, officer," said Randy. "Are we in trouble? It's been a difficult day for Trevor, and he ran from the flat terribly upset earlier. I found him up in the tree, crying. We had a lot of things we needed to talk through, and the tree seemed like as good a place as any, as he had already climbed it, and as it was so private. I'm sorry for the offense, but I'm trying my best to help him get through this. Tell the officer you're sorry, Trevor."

"I'm sorry, officer," I said quietly, keeping my head down. I wished the cop would turn down his damn radio. How did we not hear him coming?

"It's ok," said the cop. "I don't need you to apologize, Trevor, but I want you to understand that climbing trees can be very dangerous, especially when you're alone. The woman who called us said she thought you were at least fifteen meters up. You probably would have died if you'd fallen from that height, do you understand that?"

"Yes sir, I do. I won't do it again."

"That's good to hear, Trevor. A boy like you shouldn't be risking his neck just because he's upset; even if you're so upset, you need a place to scream. You children don't realize just how precious you are to your mums and dads, and your father here would be very sad if anything were to happen to you."

He turned to Randy, "Mr. Christianson, it sounds like your son is going through something difficult. They said he was positively howling up there. Are there any problems at home?"

"No, nothing like that, Sir. He had a row with his mother earlier about the boys he's been spending time with. They're the sort you probably wouldn't want your son spending time with, maybe the kind of boys you're likely to meet on duty every day. Our Trevor here needs to be angry with his mum for a while, but he's also going to remember how much she loves him, aren't you son, and that even if she makes mistakes, it's because she loves him too much to let him do things that might be a bit risky. To be honest, sir, I think that's partly why he climbed so far up that tree. He wanted to do something risky to spite her. We'll sort it out, but Trevor's just going to have to hurt for a while, aren't you, son."

"Well, just the same, I'd like to give you this card. It's for the Children and Family Services Branch. It's a much safer branch than those up there." Randy gave a polite chuckle, he was really good at this!

"You call that number if things look like they might get out of hand at home, all right? I'm not going to write any citations for this. I think a verbal caution will suffice, but I'm going to have to ask you to keep the boy out of trees in the park. Risk-taking behavior in such a young boy is a bit worrying."

"Absolutely officer, I'll do my utmost," said Randy.

"Right then," he said. The cop handed me a card and said, "Next time you feel like taking a risk, take a real risk and call this number instead."

Randy looked at him, and the cop said, "It's a youth counseling service. They understand kids better than we sometimes do, and they can be very helpful."

He turned back to me and said, "You stay safe now, son, do you hear me? No more climbing trees in the parks. And remember, son, your mum loves you, even when you're angry with her, all right?"

"Yes sir," I replied.

***

"We sure got away with that," said Randy as the cop walked away.

"Blimey, you were brilliant!" I said to him, smiling so big it hurt. I slipped off the table onto his lap and gave him a great big hug. I squeezed him with my arms, my legs, and my whole body. What a cool man, and he was so nice to me!

He kissed me once in the cheek and once on the lips and said, "Well, I do know a lot about boys and the problems they can have. It's pretty easy to improvise when you know your material well."

"Huh?" I asked him.

"Well you see Trevor, that's what I wanted to talk to you about," he said. "Seeing you all alone in that tree, so desperate to be touched and cared for, and so very excited by sexual fun that means playing naked in certain ways, like what we just did, and like what you did with Brad, I felt sad at first because you looked so lonely. But then I also saw how your loneliness so easily turned into happiness and joy. You have your own special cure for sadness and loneliness and anger; you just don't realize it yet."

"How do you know so much about me?" I asked.

"Like I said, I know a lot about boys."

"I'm still not sure I understand what you're saying, Randy," I said.

"When we were up in the tree playing around, how did you feel?" he asked.

"Really good!" I told him.

"And how did you feel afterward?" he asked.

"So happy I wanted to stay there forever," I said, "And I still feel happy! Do you want to go back up there again? The copper's gone."

"No Trevor," he said. "I've got a better idea that's also much safer. Do you have to be anywhere soon?"

"No," I replied. "I told Mum I was having tea at my friend's house, so I don't have to be home until suppertime."

"Wonderful! Then you can have tea with me. There are two boys I'd like you to meet, named Boris and Sebastian. They're from Russia, and they're staying with me for a few months. They're a lot like you in many ways."

"Do you mean they like to play naked with each other's willies?" I asked.

"Well yes, that's one thing you have in common. You all have this ability to make any situation exciting and happy, no matter how dismal things seem. None of you understood that you had that ability or how to use it. One more thing you three have in common is the ability to create that same joy in other people, even those who are not touching you. Boris and Sebastian were unhappy once too, but with a little coaching and a lot of fun, they're living very happy lives."

"You make it sound as if I can be happy all the time if I play naked with other people," I said.

That didn't sound right, but my cock was hard again, and a part of me wondered what it would be like if that was what he had in mind. I took Randy's hand and put it there so he could feel it.

"Oh, very nice," he smiled, "but not here please. Trust me; there will be plenty of time for that soon enough. What you just said… it's a bit more complicated than that, but that's certainly a good enough place to start. You don't believe me, do you?

"Would you like to meet the boys from Russia? I'm sure they'd be glad to help you with the situation that's once again arisen in your trousers; and if it's not too presumptuous of me, perhaps I can join the three of you for the fun? You see, I'm having the same situation in my trousers." He looked around, and then he placed my hand on his crotch for a few seconds. I could feel it was huge! I kissed him once more, and we fell into another full body hug.

Randy's house was huge, but more importantly, it was full of love.

Chapter 3
Boris and Sebastian

5:00 PM, Sunday, July 15

Randy and I walked a short distance to his large, detached house, which was very near my flat. There were two boys in the kitchen. The boy with long blond hair was completely naked, except for a thin gold chain hanging loosely around his waist, another around his forehead, one more around his neck, one around his left thigh, and an ankle bracelet over his right foot. The other boy, who looked older, had long, dark brown hair, was fully dressed in black jeans, a black t-shirt, black sneakers, and even black socks. It was a strange sight.

"Boys," said Randy, "I'd like you to meet my new friend, Trevor. Trevor, this is Boris" he pointed to the boy in black "and Sebastian," indicating the naked boy. "Trevor's been a bit lonely lately, and I thought perhaps we could cheer him up, and then maybe talk a little about our work."

"Hello, Trevor!" they said. They were smiling, which seemed strange. When I met new boys at school, they always had this look in their eyes, as if they were checking me out or something, trying to figure out how they could be mean to me.

I said hello back to them, a bit unsure of what was happening, and I think they could tell how nervous I was. "Oh look, Boris, he shy," said Sebastian in a thick accent.

"Trevor Boy, no need to be scared of us. Here, only us friends, no enemy. We're all good boys here, not like at school."

He walked briskly around the kitchen table and, naked as could be, he embraced me and kissed my cheek, then my lips. "Trevor Boy believe Sebastian?" he asked.

"Sure," I told him, not sure what to believe.

"Now, Trevor, I'll bet you're feeling a bit nervous, am I right?" Randy asked. I looked at him, motionless and expressionless, feeling a bit frozen.

"I'll bet part of you is thinking of running right out that door, as fast as you can, just to go back home, back to that life that made you so miserable. If you want to leave, that's ok. You can leave anytime you like, but you are also welcome to come back anytime. We only want you to be here if you want to be here. Remember what I told you in the park about your gift, the gift these two boys also share? The gift to make not only themselves happy but others as well? I think it's time you relaxed and felt happy for a while; don't you agree, boys?" he said to the others.

Boris smiled and began to walk toward me. Sebastian's face slid across my own, so I could see nothing else but his huge green eyes, accented by the gold chain hanging across his brow. He was smiling as if he were on a roller coaster. He opened his mouth wide and moved in to kiss me again, this time giving me his tongue and all the smiling power he had to offer.

I was beginning to think perhaps Randy was right. This was very nice indeed. Kissing Sebastian like this wasn't at all, like kissing Ian in front of Brad and his friends. This was sweet and lovely. This was a boy who was kissing me to share his happiness with me, not to earn a cigarette.

I felt a rush of bravado, and I reached a hand down to feel his ass and drew him nearer. Just then, I could feel something pushing at my hip. "Hello! We are three here!" It was Boris. I tried to look down, but Sebastian kept me in a lip lock that prevented me from seeing what was going on. I relaxed and let things happen. I could feel a hand pulling on the front of my shorts' waistband. My cock was already hard. Sebastian let out a moan, put his hands to the sides of my head and squeezed.

His body was moving around in a curious dance, but his head was locked onto mine in our kiss. Then there were two hands in my shorts, pulling them down, over my knees, to my ankles. A hand slid up inside the right leg opening of my underpants, then another hand followed on the left, and a third hand left my head, slid down over my shoulder, chest, and abdomen and grabbed my cock through my underwear.

Boris caressed my ass with his hands while the third hand squeezed my cock in a hand-hug. Then Boris pulled my underpants out of Sebastian's hand and down to my ankles. At about the same time, Sebastian released our unending kiss just long enough to liberate me from my shirt. As he came back to resume our kiss, I gasped deeply as I felt my cock enter Boris' warm mouth.

As I gasped, I inhaled air straight out of Sebastian's lungs. Sebastian pulled his head back just enough to have a good giggle, and we resumed. Boris worked on Sebastian's cock for a little while before returning to mine. With my shirt off, I could actually feel Sebastian's skin against mine, and it was soft and comfortable.

"Do you like having your picture taken, Trevor?" asked Randy. I tried to reply, which was difficult with Sebastian's mouth sealed over mine. "Sebastian, will you let him talk, please?"

"I'd much rather keep doing this, thank you very much," I said, and I went back to the kiss with Sebastian.

"Well then, that works just fine," said Randy. "I'd like to take a few pictures of you doing just what you're doing right now, and whatever else strikes your fancy as we go along. Boris, would you mind removing your shirt, please?"

Boris took off his shirt, and I could feel his soft skin against my legs as he continued sucking me. Randy's camera started flashing, and with each flash, I could feel a pulse of energy surge through my cock to remind me how naked I was, yet how much pleasure it brought me. Boris noticed my cock pulsing and said, "Relax, it's just pictures. Put on a show for Mamochka."

I slid my hand down over Sebastian's gold waist chain, down to his cock. I squeezed it gently and stroked it up and down, and each time I did, I could feel something different, something exciting, in our kiss.

"You boys look absolutely lovely together, just lovely," said Randy as he came in tight for the shot of my hand on Sebastian's cock, "you really do, the three of you."

My knees were starting to weaken, and my body trembled. I felt I was about to topple when Boris asked, "Would you like to lay on your back?"

"You mean so you can keep doing that?" I asked Boris. I was trembling so much I didn't think standing like that was a good idea anymore. I thought at least lying down would be safer.

"No, it's time for Sebastian give head to Trevor Boy," he answered. "Have need for Sebastian ass, he bottom for me here."

"He bottom?" I asked. "What does that mean?"

He said, "Come, you see."

He and Sebastian each took one of my hands and led me into the sitting room, with Randy trying his best to walk backward in front of us so he could continue taking pictures.

Boris placed a large velvety poof in front of the settee, and as if by command, Sebastian knelt before it and then bent over the poof, facing the settee.

"Here, Trevor Boy, sit; this is for special place," said Sebastian, patting on the portion of the settee in front of his nose. I knew what he meant. Their accents were so cute! I took my place, and Sebastian began sucking on my cock rather aggressively. For the next half hour, I don't think I exhaled a single breath in silence. I also came three more times, the first of which happened almost immediately. Before that day, I never thought boys did such things with each other. Sebastian seemed quite talented at sucking cock. He and I were alone for a minute or so except for Randy and his camera, and he made me cum right away.

"Hey, bitch boy, what the hell do you there without me?" It was Boris calling from another room after hearing me yelping through my second orgasm of the day. He hadn't missed much. Sebastian continued with his work, carefully coordinating his action with my body's heaving and twitching responses. My cock stayed hard the whole time.

Boris reappeared with a few towels, a bottle of lube, and a broad smile. He said, "Now begin real pleasure party!" He slapped Sebastian's ass and said, "Must punish Sebastian now, no?" Randy's camera continued its cadence of clicking and flashing. I gasped and tried to breathe normally, which is rather difficult when an experienced boy is sucking your cock. At times, it became difficult to remain seated.

I could see Boris through the slits between my straining eyelids, squirting lube into his hand, and rubbing it into Sebastian's ass. He rubbed some onto his cock, which was quite a bit larger than Sebastian's, and then wiped his hands with a towel. Sebastian let out a series of soft moans, though he kept perfect rhythm with my cock. I could see his back rise slightly as his eyes closed, and then he let out the softest grunt as Boris slowly penetrated him.

***

There are two things you should keep in mind about us, boys. Before puberty, we can orgasm many times in a day, but the feeling is very different. It's harsh. It's like a combination of being tickled and shocked with electricity. That harshness happens only suddenly, and then all that's left is a smile – not even a mess to wipe up. And then we can do it again and again. Somehow, that harshness happens when the boy's cock is still being stimulated after the orgasm. The feeling leading up to the orgasm is incredible, as with everybody else. The feeling after the orgasm is also incredible, though in a different way. When I tried to force myself through my orgasms, it was that feeling I was trying to make better.

The second thing you need to keep in mind is that boys obviously have smaller cocks than men do, so when we do anal with each other, it can be difficult to reach the other boy's hole; they both need to line up perfectly. That was a problem when Ian and I were ass-fucking for Brad and his mates. It wasn't a bad experience at the time, but it's disgusting when I think about it today. Little boy cock penetration doesn't require all that messy fingering and stretching out unless the boy penetrating you has an unusually large cock, which my friend Boris had.

Sebastian was used to taking Boris anally. Sebastian tightened his lips around my cock and sucked harder and faster as Boris eased his cock inside and then out and back in. This made me cum again.

"You see, he good for bottom now, Trevor Boy," said Boris. "You want to try Sebastian in ass!" Boris had such an easy smile on his face like this was just normal fun for him. I was panting and howling, and Sebastian had to struggle to keep me in my place with my cock in his mouth, though he did go much slower when I came.

"You like top or bottom, Trevor Boy?" asked Boris.

His question required some explanation to me while I was shaking with every movement of Sebastian's body. "You see, I am for top; I fuck Sebastian."

He gave Sebastian a powerful thrust, which made Sebastian's body, and therefore mine, heave. "Sebastian, now for bottom, get fucked in ass. Some others say bottom must obey, top not suck cock. This bullshit. Top fuck, bottom is fucked, no more."

"I've only really been fucked once, and it was a-ah-amazing!" I grunted as Sebastian continued his work. "Nothing like cumming when someone… wow! When someone sucks me off. It was way different, and really a bit scary. I've never fucked anyone properly, though."

Sebastian paused long enough to say, "That challenge for Sebastian for make Trevor Boy cum hard!"

He immediately turned up the heat on my cock, and I could no longer talk. Then he licked a few of his fingers, and without warning, he slid one into my ass. No, not just one, two! Then three! "Trevor Boy have natural ass. Three fingers, no hurt?"

Randy laughed out loud. "You really do know how to provoke Sebastian!"

And there it was. That feeling, that connection between my ass and my cock; that ball of lightning that filled the space between my hips and engulfed my body. I was losing my senses again. I can remember slamming my head against the back of the settee and hearing myself scream. I think I pulled Sebastian's thick blond hair hard, but he never complained.

Then came the explosion! It lasted a lot longer than it did with Brad's friend, Chris. Sebastian was using his three fingers to massage that ball of lightning, and he was still fiercely sucking that lightening out through my cock. I thought I might throw up – I couldn't handle this!

Then all was calm. After a few seconds, I became aware that Randy had me in a hold, like a hug, but more for controlling my body than for showing love.

"Sebastian has a scene tomorrow, and he needs his hair. You were really tearing at it. I had to hold your arms down."

Sebastian's head has flopped over my thigh, his eyes closed, his chains miraculously still in place, and somehow still holding my cock in his sweet lips. Boris was lying on Sebastian's back, facing me with a huge grin across his face.

"Trevor Boy make for we cum all together," he said. Then he muttered something in Russian, moved in close to me, and kissed me gently, warmly, and passionately. "Thanks for you Trevor Boy, hope for seeing much more of you!" Getting up, he turned to Randy and said, "Randy, want Trevor for fluff boy tomorrow. Is ok?"

"We'll need to talk about that. I doubt he knows what a fluff boy is, and he certainly doesn't know yet about our work at Frenetic," said Randy. "Besides, he still hasn't performed on you or Sebastian. We don't know yet how good he'll be at it."

"Oh, is good! Only need for him smile and Boris remember for today. Will be enough," said Boris.

None of this made any sense to me at the time, of course. I was wondering how people could talk calmly after what had just happened. I brushed aside Sebastian's beautiful hair and stroked his cheek. He wasn't in the mood to talk either. He just looked at me with those big eyes of his, smiled, and slurped softly on my cock. I wanted to stay that way forever. Randy and Boris didn't seem to have a problem with that. They went to another room and left us alone.

"Is powerful sex," said Sebastian after a while. "When powerful sex, we rest. Is good."

"But what made it so powerful?" I asked. "That's only happened once in my life, the one time when I was fucked."

"Sometime have sex with right person, feel powerful. Sometime is what person do for your body. Sometime person different. Sex different always, but be fucked in ass sometime more powerful than different kind sex. Some boy not like a fuck for their ass. Is ok for them, but some boy, we two, have sentiv… sensive… sentisivity for asses. Feel much better for us. Make Trevor Boy good for bottom!"

"I must tell Boris then! He asked me if I'm a top or a bottom. I guess I know now!"

"Not yet," said Sebastian. "Might also like yo fuck boy in his ass. Is ok do both. Want try for my ass?" he asked.

"Here, show you what fluff boy do." He started sucking my cock again. "Fluff boy suck you until you hard. Then if you get soft, he suck you more, make you hard again. Sometimes do other thing, must make hard."

"Ok," I said, still not understanding why there was a word for that.

After sucking me a little more, he slathered his own saliva around my cock with his tongue and said "There for Trevor Boy, is ready for fuck into my ass. Put in there."

His ass was already slippery with lube from Boris, and my cock slid in easily and so very comfortably like it was home and cozy. It was like a tickling sensation, but much smoother.

"Have long cock for small boy. Is nice, Trevor Boy?" asked Sebastian.

I slowly slid it all the way out, and as I did so, I could feel Sebastian tightening his ass muscles, which set me off with pleasure. I had wondered if my cock was bigger or smaller than other boys who were eight, nearly nine, but I seemed to have no problem fucking Sebastian's hole. I slid my cock back in again with a moan.

"Oh, yes, it's very nice!" The pleasure grew with each thrust, and soon our moans of pleasure attracted Boris and Randy back into the room.

"Oh yes, is very nice," said Boris. "I like boy much for working. Must help him start with us. Will be very much success, will sell for much money."

"I think you're right, Boris," said Randy.

Still, I wasn't listening. All that mattered was this beautiful boy I was fucking, just him and me.

Somehow that changed when Randy unzipped his trousers, pulled out his own cock, and started stroking it. He said, "I told you that you had a gift to share. You have the power to spread happiness to other people, just by doing what makes you happy. Watching you two give pleasure to each other makes me feel good, and now I want to masturbate while watching you two. Do you mind if I do that?" Boris was fully dressed again, but I could see he was rubbing his cock through his black jeans.

"Um, sure," I said.

I quite liked the idea of being watched while fucking Sebastian. It was like a part of that fantasy of getting caught. There was something to what Randy had said. Sebastian and I were the ones fucking, and it felt good! It spread the feeling to other people, just by their watching us. Sebastian looked back at me, and I could see he was giggling. I slapped his ass and gave him a good pounding after that. He stroked himself underneath, and soon we both came, but Randy hadn't. He'd been too busy taking the pictures to join in the action earlier, and it just didn't feel like we were done yet.

"Randy," I said, "Can I suck your cock?" I remembered the salty-sweet taste of cum, and I wanted that taste in my mouth again.

"Trevor," he said, "the rule in this house is that if you can see it, you can touch it, suck it, or fuck it, so yes, anytime!" Randy stood up while I pulled his trousers down and began my business quite literally, as it turned out.

His cock was nice and big. He'd shaved all of his pubic hair, though. I asked him why he'd done that, and he said it was something to do with his business, which we would talk about when we were finished.

I love big men's cocks, but they can be hard to suck if they don't fit into your mouth. Randy showed me how to masturbate his cock with my hand while I was sucking on the part that I could fit into my mouth. He taught me how to go in and out with it, while keeping my hand going at the same speed.

After a while, Boris said, "Oh look! Trevor Boy do it!"

Randy began to grunt out loud. He grabbed my hair with one hand and stroked my head with the other. I could tell when he wanted me to go faster because he was using my hair like a bridle on a horse, guiding me along to provide him with the most pleasure possible. Guiding me, but not forcing me. His whole body was heaving, and I was actually beginning to get frightened.

"I'm going to cum," said Randy. "Open your mouth wide and keep working it with your hand. That way, I'll cum in your mouth, and Boris and Sebastian can see it. Ready? Here… I… go!!!"

I had forgotten how warm it was when it came out, but there was that taste again, finally! I swallowed some, but while my mouth was closed, he squirted some on my nose and chin. I let that go and opened up to catch the rest. When he seemed done, I wiped the bit from my chin and swallowed it, and then sucked the last few drips from Randy's cock. Sebastian licked the last bit off my nose.

Chapter 4
Business

6:00 PM, Sunday, July 15

Randy, Boris, Sebastian, and I began discussing opportunities for me in the child porn business.

***

"Have you had a good time here today, Trevor?" asked Randy, sitting down on the settee.

"Of course, I have! What a silly thing to ask!"

"Good, I'm glad to hear it," he said. "I want to talk more with you about why Boris and Sebastian have come here to London. You see, they are actors, and I am their agent in the UK. They act in movies, porn movies. Do you know what those are?"

"No," I replied, a bit embarrassed, but extremely curious.

"Porn movies are movies showing people having sex," said Randy. "If I'd recorded all of this afternoon's fun on video, we could sell it as a porn video and make money. The pictures I took are also a form of porn."

"You mean they do this all the time on video and get paid for it?" I asked.

"Exactly," said Randy. "It's a rather large industry here in Britain, and in the whole world. From the moment I met you this afternoon in the park, I must say I thought you'd do well in this business."

"But we're just kids," I said. "Who would want to watch kids having sex? No one would want to see that! Maybe other kids, but I've never seen videos of anyone having sex when I visit another kid's house either."

"But Trevor, my boy, you've just seen it today," said Randy. "When you were fucking Sebastian, just a few moments ago, did you see my response? Have you already forgotten what I've told you about your gift, even after seeing it in action? Certainly, it depends on which kids they are, just as it depends on which adults we all find attractive. Still, you and other kids like you, and like Boris and Sebastian, can make people feel pleasure and happiness simply by doing what feels pleasurable to you in front of them, or with them. Some adults like some children, just as some children like some adults. There are millions of porn movies that have been made featuring adults but far fewer featuring children. This is a special market called child pornography. Believe me when I say there are millions of adults who would pay dearly to purchase porn movies featuring you."

"Is true, Trevor Boy," said Boris. "Make hundred fifty movie in UK, get paid almost one million pound, also money for website, private show, sometimes get paid have sex with rich person, much money all times. Tomorrow Sebastian and Boris make other movie. Want you come for join us. Trevor Boy make money also if my fluff boy for Boris."

"So, that's what Sebastian was talking about!" I said. "You mean, if you need help getting hard or staying hard, I just come in and suck your cock for a little while, right?"

"Is exactly!" said Boris.

"Yes," said Sebastian, "also hope be my fluff boy?"

"That sounds fantastic!" I said. "What a brilliant way to make money! Er," I hesitated, "how much money will I make?"

"Well," said Randy, "the studio budget allows three hundred pounds per scene for fluff services for each actor, so if Boris and Sebastian both want you, your payment will be six hundred pounds."

"Six hundred quid? For sucking their cocks? I'd do that for free!"

"You don't want anyone to hear you saying that around the studio, or you might just wind up with a severe pay cut," he chuckled. "You'll need to remain undressed in the studio throughout the whole shoot, and ready at a moment's notice. A few directors will allow you to wear a robe if you're cold, and if your actor says it's ok, but the rules say you're to be completely naked throughout. You never know when or how much assistance your actor might need, so there's always a chance you'll go home with a sore jaw. You don't get paid for the actual work you do, but the work you're willing to do as a fluff boy.

"Now, if you decide you want to pursue child porn as a career, the real money is onscreen. Fees vary depending on what you're willing to do in front of the camera and how good you are at being sexy and cute onscreen. Generally speaking, talented boys can make twelve thousand for doing a scene with other boys, more if you bottom for a man, still more if there's more than one man, and a nice bonus to take multiple facial cumshots or swallow multiple cumshots, but less if your scene is with a woman, still less with a girl. Plus, there's the kink and fetish bonus schedule, which we sometimes call K and F, for all the kinky stuff."

"Did you say twelve thousand quid?" I asked. That's mostly what I heard him say.

"That is what Boris and Sebastian both make for their boy-boy scenes. Why do you think they come to the UK to make so many movies? The child-porn industry is enormous in Russia, bigger than anywhere else in the world, but the bosses keep the big money. They would be lucky to earn fifty euros for a Russian film. Since they both speak English, they can work in the big money studios and make world-class porn, not just the typical camera on a tripod shot of Grandpa fucking his drugged-up grandkids in some cheap Siberian hotel room."

"Oh, gross!" I said. "Do they really do that?"

"Some do," said Randy. "Here we can produce a quality product. Here, talent is well paid, and no one at any studio here would ever drug a kid to make porn! It's cruel and so unnecessary when there are so many kids who want to make these films. That's something desperate individuals resort to when they feel they need a specific kid, but the kid is unwilling, or maybe the individual can't afford to pay a fair price. It's sick, and their life in prison is pretty rough when they get caught."

"Sometimes work Czechia or Hungaria," said Sebastian, "but here is much better, here and America. Much money for America, plus have BBC!"

Randy explained that in the porn industry, BBC means 'big black cock,' which refers to porn featuring African American men with enormous cocks. Sebastian is such an experienced bottom that he can take the biggest BBC's in the industry. That's where he makes a large portion of his money.

"So," said Randy, "what do you think, Trevor? Would you like to join us at the studio tomorrow, have some more fun, and make a few quid?"

"Oh yes, please!" I said. I couldn't think of anything more wonderful in my life! "Can I see some of these child-porn movies? Do you have any videos?"

"Of course!" replied Randy. "Boys, why don't you show Trevor some of your finest work on the computer. I have a few phone calls to make, and I want to email a few of these snaps to Eastman."

Boris and Sebastian acted like kids quibbling over who gets to show off their favorite toys. They were quite excited to show me their finest work. Sebastian made sure I saw his scene with Malcolm XXX, whose cock had to be a foot long, to demonstrate his work with BBC's. Boris showed me a scene he did with two very pretty Thai ladyboys. I was too confused by that to even ask a question, so I just watched.

Before long, I suggested I get some practice as a fluff boy. I started with Boris, and both he and Sebastian gave me several good suggestions for giving Boris the best service possible, including deep-throating his unusually long and large cock. That took a lot of practice, and in the end, we decided I wasn't experienced enough to do it without risking me vomiting, though I'm proud to say that within days I was quite adept at the technique. Then we did the same with Sebastian. He likes a little nipple play, and if we can manage it, he always likes his fluff boy's finger in his ass. He said he might also want to play with my cock while I'm providing services.

Soon it was time for me to go home for supper. That made me sad because I'd just enjoyed the best day of my life, met two super boys whom I knew would become great friends, and possibly just changed my whole life.

Then Randy had a suggestion. "Why don't I walk home with you, I'll speak with your mother about tomorrow, and if we're lucky, maybe we can persuade her to let you come back here to spend the night after you've had your supper. What say you to that?"

"Brilliant!" was all I could think to say. Boris and Sebastian were also rather excited about the idea.

7:00 PM, Sunday, July 15

Randy performed as well with my mum as he had with the cop in the park earlier that day. He said that he was Boris and Sebastian's agent, that they were actors with a major production house in London, that they were shooting a film the next day, and that I was invited to spend the day on the set with them. He gave her a large, glossy brochure describing the studios and, in general terms, how films are made in the 'Children's Film Division' at Frenetic. He gave her another smaller brochure for parents of children who work in film, which described the policy of granting a parental stipend as standard, and which described how health, safety, and education were handled on the set. There was an invitation for her to tour the set at any time, as long as it was between 2:00 and 6:00 on a Friday afternoon, and a number to call to set up the visit. I could see immediately that these brochures were meant for parents like Mum, parents who would be reluctant to allow their kids anywhere near a porn studio, but who were also uninterested in what their children got up to. They must have dealt with many reluctant parents before.

He added that call time for the shoot was 7:00 AM, so perhaps it would be best for me to spend the night at his place. Mum bought it all, even my story about Boris and Sebastian being school chums of mine, spending the year and now the summer holidays working in the UK.

After supper, I packed a bag of clothes I knew I wouldn't be needing, promised Mum I'd behave, and set off for Randy's house. My cock was hard from the moment I began packing my bag.

8:00 PM, Sunday, July 15

Sebastian and Boris greeted me with huge smiles and kisses when I arrived. I decided to follow Sebastian's lead and simply undress as soon as I was inside. Being naked in front of people was so exciting!

"Trevor Boy remember rule, no?" said Sebastian, as he stroked my cock.

"Of course I do," I said as I stroked his. "So, where do we sleep?" I asked, just as Randy, a woman with red hair, and a pretty young girl in a short, white dress with pink floral print, who appeared to be the woman's red-haired daughter, entered the kitchen with us. I'd never felt so naked in my life.

"Ah," said Boris. "You meet Annie. She film with Boris, with Sebastian for tomorrow. Annie, this boy Trevor, Trevor Boy, this also Annie's mum. She Mrs. MacKay."

"It's Darla," she said.

"Hello, Trevor," said Annie. She was looking me in the eye, wearing a delightful, genuine smile, not betraying a hint of whether she thought it was odd to be introduced to a naked boy who was holding another naked boy's cock.

She was pretty! She was pretty in ways that I didn't know girls could be pretty. I quickly let go of Sebastian's cock, and she giggled cutely. I'd never cared before if a girl was pretty. I didn't like them that way. Sometimes I wished I could be pretty, so I liked to pay attention to what makes girls pretty, but I'd never wanted to be with a pretty girl because she was pretty.

Annie was more than pretty. She had an elegance about her that I didn't understand. Her voice was not normal for a girl. It was soft and soothing, but it was also knowing, and a bit posh. She was slender, and something about her knees made her look even prettier. Maybe it was the shape of her bones; I don't know. I just knew she was pretty, and I was scared that I might do something stupid and never get to know her.

"So nice to meet you, Trevor," said Darla. "Randy says we'll be seeing a lot of you tomorrow, though I can't imagine seeing more of you than we can see right now," she chuckled. "See you tomorrow Randy. Come along, Annie. You have an early call in the morning, and we mustn't keep the boys up too late. Now remember, you boys, save some for tomorrow!" Annie turned to wave to me over her shoulder and gave me a very pretty smile as they departed.

"All right, boys," said Randy, "Who wants hot cocoa?" I was trembling, and probably rather pale. "Are you ok, Trevor? What's happened?"

"I didn't know you had company," I said. "I was already undressed…"

"And so was Sebastian. It's ok, Trevor. They know us. They're in the business too. You will never see anyone in this house who does not share our attitudes about our bodies, love, nudity, any of that. You are always safe here."

"Oh Trevor Boy! You embarrass for girls? Is no need! Annie, she pretty. You also pretty. Work together naked, have sex, is no big deal," said Sebastian as he dashed over to give me a hug and more kisses.

"It's just that they're the first girls to see me naked beside Mum," I said, not wanting to tell them what I had just experienced in those few minutes when Annie had been in the room. Annie… but she was a girl!

"There will be girls and women on the set tomorrow, and they will all see you naked all day long. You will also see the girls naked and having sex. Are you going to be ok with that?" asked Randy.

"Yeah, sure I am," I said. "I think it's just that I wasn't expecting them tonight. I'll be expecting them tomorrow. I'll be fine. I guess I thought the movie was going to be all boys. But I like girls too, sort of, only I like boys a bit more." Except for Annie…

"Well then, you'll like Annie," said Randy. "She's actually a boy. There will be girls doing scenes tomorrow – Boris, I think you're doing a boy-girl thing just after lunch – but Annie isn't one of the girls."

"Really?" I exclaimed. "She's a boy? She really is pretty." Now it began to make sense–sort of. I had never felt that way about a boy before, either.

Sebastian laid his head on my shoulder and put his hand on my chest. "Trevor Boy, YOU really pretty."

I know he didn't exactly mean "pretty," or maybe he did, but he was very comforting. The nervousness was dissolving again, merging with the thrill of it all. I knew I was just fine. I felt Sebastian's hand cupping my cock, which became erect immediately, and Sebastian was giggling again.

"Randy Man," he said, "Trevor Boy feel ok!" Boris burst out laughing, but it took Randy a few seconds to see what Sebastian was talking about, "And would much like cocoa."

I slept with the boys that night in a large bed in the spare room, thinking I could use the time together to practice the things they had taught me earlier about how to be a good fluff boy. I woke each of them up with my finest blowjobs yet. I wanted to be the best I could be because this child-porn film industry sounded like what I wanted to do for the rest of my life.

Chapter 5
FSP

6:00 AM, Monday, July 16

Amber and me talking things over in the Fluff Services locker room.

***

It was difficult to wake up so early, but we were required to be at the studio by 7:00 in the morning. I had been happy to go to bed early with Boris and Sebastian the night before because I knew we would be able to play all we wanted. Still, I learned that cumming could make me sleepy, and I came a few times with them that night, so I fell asleep earlier than I usually would.

After a shower and breakfast, Randy drove us a half-hour north to the studio. Every nerve in my body bristled with excitement! I had met Randy fourteen hours ago, in the tree, in a different life. This was so new and intense!

Randy showed a card to a security guard, who then opened a gate to let us into the car park at Frenetic Studios, the premier children's pornographic film production house in the UK. Frenetic produced most genres of porn, but child porn was their biggest moneymaker.

Randy then passed the card in front of a scanner on the outer door of the largest building that I could see, and we entered my new life. A man met us in the front lobby.

"So is this the new boy Randy?" he asked, pointing at me. "Hello Trevor," he said, "My name is Philip Eastman. I'm the executive producer here at Frenetic. Randy has told me so much about you, and welcome back boys! Sebastian, how are you," he said, leaning down to kiss Sebastian on the lips. "And Boris! So good to have you back for another day of magic! You boys run along to your dressing rooms. Sebastian, Sharon is ready for you on stage 7. I guess makeup needs extra time with you or something. Randy, can I have a word with you and young Trevor here?"

"Of course, sir, of course," said Randy.

7:00 AM, Monday, July 16

We entered a large office a short way down the hall from the lobby. There was a raised platform at one end, a counter with coffee and teacakes at the other end, and chairs in between.

"Now Trevor," began Mr. Eastman, "as I understand it, this is the first time you've worked in our industry, is that right?"

"Yes sir," I responded.

"Good, good," he said, "so no contract buyouts or anything like that to worry about, excellent. Now, as I understand things, you are here today as a fluff boy." He handed me a sheet of paper. "Here is a description of what will be expected of you for today's filming. I shouldn't worry too much about the particulars today as you'll be working with Sebastian and then Boris?"

He turned to Randy. "Is that right? The one after the other?" Randy nodded, and then Mr. Eastman turned back to me. "You will be paid cash at the end of the day, and there is no written contract involved. However, as I understand things, you have also expressed an interest in working for us on camera. That will require a written contract once you have passed the on-camera audition, and as you are a minor, it will have to be signed by your parent or guardian. We have a legal staff that will be happy to help you set up a trust fund for your income so that you remain in charge of your earnings. Now, will you please step up onto the platform and strip off your clothes. I'd like to see what we're working with here."

Everything was happening so fast! All this legal talk about contracts and trusts, and suddenly he wanted me up on a platform, on display naked? Well, that was what I'd come for, so I stepped onto the platform and stripped right down to nothing, feeling a bit bashful, with him pacing around me as if he were appraising a used car.

"Nice, very good, very good," said Mr. Eastman. "Now turn around for me and face away from me. Thank you, that's excellent. Now would you please spread your legs a bit? Yes, that's very nice, very nice. Now bend over and touch your toes. Excellent!" I could feel his breath on my ass.

"Now, please stand back up and face me again. Now put your hands on your hips and bend back as far as you can. Excellent." As I looked at the ceiling, I could feel his breath on my cock. "Now, show me what you look like with an erection."

I looked at Randy, and he gave me an encouraging wink. I reached down to stroke my cock, but it stood right up with hardly any assistance. I smiled at Mr. Eastman because I could tell he liked this.

"Excellent Trevor," he said, leaning down to examine my boner closely, "truly excellent! Thank you so much, Trevor. You may put your clothes back on if you wish." I put my shorts back on and Mr. Eastman said, "Thank you so much Trevor, it's been a pleasure meeting you. Randy, we'll be in touch."

"Thank you, sir," I said, returning Mr. Eastman's proffered handshake.

"Yes, thank you, sir," said Randy as we left the office.

"Now to the set. Let's see here; we'll begin in studio seven with Sebastian. He's doing a scene with three men. Nice way to start the day, eh Trevor?"

We followed a series of corridors that eventually led to a locker room. "These are the children's fluff lockers, where you undress," said Randy. "At Frenetic, a child is anyone who is under 16. Once you leave here, you enter the studios, and it's all business. Just choose a locker, put all your clothes in it except your undies, shoes too. Undies go in the box in your locker door; that's important for later. Now hang the red locker key around your neck. That's a way to let the stage crew know you're a fluff boy, and not in the scene. You should also read over those instructions Mr. Eastman gave you. He really liked you, you know."

"Did he really? I couldn't tell if he was just polite."

"It's true, he is a businessman," Randy said, "and therefore part politician, but trust me, he was truly impressed by you. Most boys your age would have been terrified and completely unable to get an erection on command like that, and he knows it. You impressed him with that. Part of what he sees is that you do want to be seen, to perform in front of people and that performing in front of people is a bit of a turn-on for you. In this business, that's a real plus, especially for males. Besides, you might not know this, but when you've got a stiffie, your cock is rather longer than normal for a boy your age. Yesterday when you were fucking Sebastian, that fact became obvious. Most eight-year-old boys don't have cocks long enough to fuck another boy properly. All right," he said as I hung the red locker key around my neck, "let's join Sebastian in Studio Seven. Are you nervous?"

"Just a bit, but I'm mostly excited," I said as we exited the locker room through a door opposite the one we had entered.

The idea of being naked and having sex in front of people was almost like being caught in the tree. It was my fantasy that someone would catch me and see me naked, playing with myself. I wanted to be seen, but there was something exciting about the risk too.

"Is it ok if I touch myself while I'm here?" This whole idea of sex in front of people and making porn movies was so new to me. I didn't know anything, but I felt safe with Randy.

"Is it ok? It's rather expected of you," said Randy. "It's your job as a fluff boy to be hot and horny at all times, so yeah, play with yourself, play with the other fluff boys or girls if you like, quietly during filming, and if something on the set turns you on, react to it. Touch yourself – let the actors know they're turning you on. It's your job to feel pleasure and to give pleasure. Just do as the other fluff boys do and you'll be fine."

I grabbed my cock and stroked it a few times as we walked. Another naked fluff boy met us in the corridor with a red key hanging from his neck. He stopped, smiled at me, and said, "Hey, new kid!" He put his arms around me and kissed me on the lips, then briefly tugged on my cock as we parted. "You're going to love it here!"

I thought, "Too right, I will!

***

Randy showed his card to the security guards at the door to studio seven, and they let us in. Randy grinned at me and said, "Cute naked boys don't need a security card to get in here."

When the door opened, I saw a huge room with dozens of lights hanging from the ceiling. There were three large cameras, one of which was on a curved set of tracks, rather like a railroad locomotive. Several other cameras were hanging from the ceiling. On the left were a few mattresses.

"That's the fluff area, where you'll be for the shoot," said Randy.

On the right was a rather large shower area with four showerheads. Just behind the fluff area were two women with laundry carts. "This is Inez and Esmeralda," said Randy. "Ladies, meet Trevor. He's a new FSP on this shoot."

"Hi Trayvor," they both said.

"Hi Inez and Esmer…" I stammered. "Hi ladies," I said. They both giggled.

"Oh, él es tan lindo!" said Esmeralda. They both looked like they wanted to be my grandmother.

"Towels please, ladies," said Randy. Inez handed me two folded bath towels, and Esmeralda handed me two folded hand towels. They were softer and fluffier than anything I'd seen before.

"Frenetic is the classiest studio in the UK," said Randy. "They use only the best."

Just then, Sebastian appeared out of nowhere. He had what looked like dirt smeared all over his left thigh, hip, and ass cheek.

"Oh! Is nice for see you Trevor Boy!" he said. "This is scene for put dirt on me. Not suck for cock fluffing, ok?"

He handed me a bizarre-looking device with a handle at one end and a curved, head-looking thing at the other. "For fluff, switch on, put for ass in me, and push to back of cock, ok?" he said.

"Ok," I said, not sure I understood at all what he meant.

"Ok, Trevor Boy," he said, giving me a quick kiss. "I see you on set!"

Randy explained to me that this scene required fake dirt to be smeared all over Sebastian's body and that I couldn't suck his cock at all because that would clean the fake dirt makeup off. I could use the anal vibrator that Sebastian handed me, or I could stick my fingers in his ass, but I couldn't suck his cock.

"Ok," I said. This seemed weird and new, but it also seemed to make my job easier.

Boris appeared next to me, completely naked, and with a red key hanging from his neck. "Work for King Khan this scene for fluff boy," he said. "Normal for work fluff boy for Sebastian this scene, but today he like you."

"Boris!" I exclaimed, kissing him. "Brilliant! We get to work together as fluff boys for my first scene! But what is King Khan?"

"Oh, he big man with very big cock, like small boy, but he get me," said Boris.

"Oh, wow…" I said. I couldn't wait to see this scene!

"Oh yes," he said. "But so tired." He lay down on the mattresses in the fluff area, as if he were to fall asleep.

"Oh no, you silly bitchnik!" I said with a smile. I jumped on him and took his long cock into my mouth. "You have work to do," I said, pausing from sucking him. He didn't move, but he gave me a huge smile. I loved Boris!

As the production crew gathered onstage, I again remembered how naked I was. I thought of Mum, and even of Ian, but that made me feel more excited about what I was doing. I looked Boris in the eye, and thoughts of my old life, which had ended less than a day ago, melted away.

***

Notice

Frenetic Studios, Children's Film Division

Service Standards: Fluff Service Providers FSP's

Welcome to Frenetic Studios! You are here to provide Fluff Services for a specific Actor or Actors in one or more of our productions. This means that during the time when the scene is scheduled to be filmed:

FSP's must either be with their Actor, in the designated fluff area on the set, or in a location designated by the Director or Stage Manager.

If the Director or Stage Manager calls "Fluff," FSP's must immediately go to their Actors and provide services. Studio down-time is very expensive, so please perform your services passionately and conscientiously, and remember the love.

An Actor may release her or his FSP to assist another FSP with another Actor. The FSP is under no obligation to provide services to another Actor, though it is generally regarded as a professional courtesy.

FSP's are not allowed to wear clothing in the studio area. Jewelry is permitted unless the actor indicates otherwise. Footwear, legwear, and accessories are permitted if requested by the Actor

FSP's should always have in their possession one clean bath towel and two clean hand towels, which the studio's laundry service will provide.

If you sit on a chair or any other furniture on the set while unclothed, you must first put a bath towel down for you to sit on. Once used in this way, the towel is considered soiled and must be laundered before re-use.

If you use toys or accessories as part of your service, you must have them with you at all times. You are responsible for keeping them clean according to Frenetic Studio standards. Facilities will be available on each set for this purpose.

FSP's must remain silent once the Director or Stage Manager calls "Quiet on the set" or "Action" until the Director calls "Cut." However, they may silently interact or perform in the designated fluff area for the benefit of the actors onstage.

The use of tobacco, inhalants, alcohol, and other drugs is prohibited at Frenetic Studios. However, the Director may exercise discretion with Actors concerning alcoholic beverages in dressing rooms, on the set, or in a scene. Any prescription medication may be used if the prescription is verified by the Set Nurse, and it must be used only as indicated in the prescription. Adults may use non-prescription medications at their discretion. Children must have written permission from a parent or legal guardian, or a physician at the studio clinic.

During any breaks or down-time, FSP's should check in with their Actors to see if services are required. FSP's are not entitled to any breaks except one hour for lunch.

The FSP's only duty is to love and do whatever is necessary to keep their actor sexually aroused.

Everything else is secondary.

Shooting schedule (subject to modification by the Director, FSP call times are at least one hour earlier)

Our normal weekday schedule is as follows:

9:00 AM – 1:00 PM First Scene

1:00 PM – 2:00 PM Lunch

2:00 PM – 6:00 PM Second Scene (only if necessary on Fridays)

6:00 PM – 7:00 PM Tea or Supper

7:00 PM – 11:00 PM Third Scene (only if necessary any day)

Our normal schedule for Saturdays and Sundays (only if necessary) is as follows:

7:00 AM – 9:50 AM First Scene

10:10 AM – 1:00 PM Second Scene

1:00 PM – 2:00 PM Lunch

2:00 PM – 4:50 PM Third Scene

5:10 PM – 8:00 PM Fourth Scene

***

"Hi boys!" said a smiling girl approaching the fluff area; only this girl had a cock. "I'm Jeanine. I'm fluffing for Pao Pao." I was beginning to think there were a lot of boys who dressed as girls here.

"Hello," said Boris, shaking her hand, as if this were nothing unusual. He kissed her on the lips. "This my friend Trevor. He fluffing Sebastian. I fluff King Khan," he continued.

"You gonna like Trevor Boy! Hey Trevor Boy, you ever see tranny before, like for ladyboy video? Girl have penis. Very sexy!" He took her penis in his hand and stroked it gently.

I thought about Annie from last night and tried to imagine her… or him… with a cock. It was thrilling to think about, but somehow it was more than thrilling. Annie was so pretty and so mysterious that thinking about her naked made me feel something beyond thrilling. I couldn't tell what that feeling was, but I liked it a lot. Somehow, I was sure I would never get to know her or be friends with her, though. She was… something different, and I didn't know what made me think so, but I was just a plain ordinary boy, not like her.

"Do you guys know how this works?" I asked Boris and Jeanine, showing them the anal vibrator.

"Oh, I know!" said Jeanine. "Come here and I'll show you." I crawled around next to her on the mattress. She showed me how the little head on the vibrator had to be pointed a certain way so that it rubbed against the prostate.

She rolled over on all fours and said, "Try it out on me! You want to make sure you know what you're doing when the time comes. Lube the thing up, but start with your fingers. Just slide a couple of fingers in my ass. Oh! Yeah, that's right! Now feel around the bottom, toward the fro-o-ont! That's the spot, right where your finger is! That's my prostate. Do you feel the raised round area there? That's where you want the vibrator head to be. Now try it with the vibrator."

I lubed up the vibrator, and within a few seconds, Jeanine was squeaking with pleasure. Some of the crew came by to watch. Boris slid under Jeanine to suck her cock, and Jeanine reciprocated the favor. Before long, Jeanine couldn't suck anymore – she could only howl.

"All right boys, save some for your actors," called a woman's voice.

I stood up behind Jeanine while the others moaned in disapproval and rolled over facing her.

"You must be Trevor. I'm Sharon, the stage manager."

Sharon was a woman of about 30 with dark blond hair in a ponytail. She was wearing a headset and carrying a clipboard. Beside her stood a naked teenage girl with a red key around her neck.

"This young lady is Amber. She's fluffing for Rodney."

I was surprised at the look of Amber. She was terrifically pretty, with wavy, bright blond hair, a chrome belt around her waist, the biggest hazel eyes I'd seen. Long-legged, slender, with fairly small breasts, and a little bit of trimmed blond pubic hair; she looked too proper to like sex. She confused me.

"Nice to meet you, Trevor," she said. "How old are you?"

"I'm eight, almost nine."

"I'm fourteen. You haven't done this before, have you. I can tell by your eyes. Don't worry; you'll love it here!"

With Sebastian, Boris, and even Jeanine, sliding right into sex play was easy, but I felt intimidated by Amber. I felt like I had to mind my manners around her.

"Do you like pussy?" she asked me.

I was shocked to hear such an elegant girl use such a word. It was almost as if I had forgotten we were in a porn studio.

"I guess I don't know. I've never seen one. I've only been with boys."

"Oh, so you're still a girl-virgin?"

"I guess so," I said.

"You should stay that way until you do a scene with a girl. They pay bonus money if you do some things for the first time on camera. You could make a bonus for eating pussy, and you would even make double pay for the first time you do a scene by yourself with a girl, and even more, if there is more than one girl involved" She gave me a long, lovely kiss, and said, "I hope we can fuck properly some time. I would love to be the girl you earn your double pay with!"

I smiled and said, "I'd like that too. You're really pretty, and I love your belt!"

This made her giggle for some reason, and she said, "Thank you, sweet boy." She kissed me again.

8:00 AM, Monday, July 16

"Are we all ready? Is everybody ready?" called Sharon. "All right, places please." Others down the hallway where Sebastian had come from earlier repeated the call.

"That means we need to be on the fluff mattresses," said Amber.

Soon Sebastian appeared, all covered in dirt, including what looked like dried mud in his hair, which was completely matted. Three huge Polynesian-looking men were following him toward the set, dressed in some sort of Polynesian traditional costumes with grass skirts and wreaths around their heads. Sebastian walked onto the set, which consisted of palm trees, tropical plants; a typical south Pacific island setting. In the center was a bamboo hut, in front of two large boulders on either side of the hut entrance. There was a well, off to the side of the hut. The men went into the hut, and Sebastian went round behind the hut.

"Ok, quiet on the set," said a man I hadn't met. Then "roll cameras and action!"

Sebastian peeked around the hut, looking left and right. He slowly tiptoed to the well in a crouched-down posture. He lowered the well bucket into the water and brought it back up for a drink. As he was raising the bucket to his lips, a loud grunt was heard within the hut. Suddenly the door flew open and the three men poured out, one taking Sebastian by his left ankle and wrist, another by his right ankle and wrist, and the third by his filthy hair.

They pinned him to the ground amid great struggle and very convincing screams from Sebastian. The men seemed to be laughing as they used the rope from the well bucket to tie Sebastian's neck to the well, and then his wrists to his neck. Sebastian was facing into the well with his ass conveniently pointed toward the men.

One man retrieved a bunch of bananas from the hut. He tore off one and approached Sebastian's ass.

"No! No!" screamed Sebastian as the men laughed. "NO! God, please, NO!" He shrieked as the man jammed the banana deep into his ass. "OH GOD UGH! PLEASE NO!!!"

The man jerked it in and out several times to Sebastian's continued shrieking before removing it. He then peeled the banana and inserted it entirely into Sebastian's ass. I was getting worried about Sebastian! This didn't look at all like the kind of fun sex play I was expecting, and it looked to me like he was getting hurt! Then the man tore off his grass skirt, revealing an enormous cock as I'd never seen before!

"Cut!" called the same man who had called "action."

After brief words with Sharon, she called "Fluff!" We all sprang onto the set. "How are you, Sebastian! They're torturing you!"

"Oh, you so sweet be concerned, Trevor boy! This all planned first, Nothing hurt. See? Rope soft. King Khan lube and loosen me before shoot. Use vibrator, ok?"

"Ok," I said. I turned it on and inserted it. "It's mashing up the banana," I told him.

"Is good. That what we need. Oh! Ma… make scene look messy when men fuck me. You like! Oh Trevor Boy! Ahhh.. is so good you sweet boy! Look, Khan fuck Boris now! He not so much like bottom, and Khan HUGE! Boris have sore ass tonight. Need give him much nice tonight."

Just then, Sharon called "Places!" The actors resumed their positions.

Then the man called "Action!" Khan stuck his cock up to Sebastian's ass and let out a roar that was louder than Sebastian's scream as he shoved it in. Khan pounded his ass hard, and banana mash flew everywhere. Sebastian screamed and cried real tears.

Amber moved in front of me, looked deep into my eyes, and whispered, "Your friend is fine. He's one of the best actors we have here. He's really convincing."

She kissed me deeply. She was so much older and very pretty. She was a proper lady, even though she was fourteen. She was nothing but softness and prettiness. I didn't like girls that way, but Amber fascinated me. It was something I had never experienced before, one of many such things I would experience that day. She let me touch her pussy. I didn't want to put my fingers inside, but I explored the outside. I found a little bump near the top that made her jump a little when I touched it. She pulled my hand away, saying she would explain later.

I was surprised that Sebastian's Polynesian gangbang scene took the entire four hours due to constant lighting adjustments, makeup tweaking, equipment issues, and re-takes from different angles. He had to repeat the banana scene three times before the director was happy, and the third time he had me shove the new banana in myself before I mashed it with the anal vibrator.

"This classy place, make only very classy film," Sebastian told me. "You understand soon. Filming cost money, so director want all things perfect."

Boris lay down on the mattress next to us, the massive cock belonging to King Khan gliding softly and gently in and out of his weary ass. Khan was watching Sebastian and me. He winked at me with a smile, as if to say, "I will have you next, boy!"

Sebastian looked at him with a grin and said, "Oh Khan, Trevor Boy he very new. Be nice! He no ready for you yet. Soon, ok? You love Boris now." He kissed Khan with a giggle.

I glanced on the set and I saw Amber on her knees with Rodney. He had just made his money shot before the director yelled, "Cut."

One thing I learned that day was that at Frenetic Studios, during a four-hour scene, actors were expected to provide more than one money shot if needed. That's what they call it when an older male actor shoots his cum, and it was Amber's job to help him get ready for his second shot. That meant cleaning off any cum still dripping from his cock and getting him hard again.

Like all the men who worked on that scene, Rodney's cock was at least eight inches long, and he was shoving the whole thing down her throat! He was holding her by the hair and forcing it all the way inside her mouth, balls deep! Amber coughed when she could, and drool fell in great drips from her chin. I thought of Sebastian's acting skill, and I said nothing until lunchtime. I'm glad I waited.

1:00 PM, Monday, July 16

Traditionally the actors and fluff staff didn't share lunch together in the Frenetic Studios cafeteria, so I had lunch with Boris and the girls, or whatever you call someone like Jeanine. Sebastian wanted to join us, but the three men insisted he eats with them. They seemed a bit rude, but Sebastian was flattered.

It felt strange to see the girls in clothes, and Jeanine was a girl when I couldn't see her penis. I looked at Amber and thought of Rodney shoving his gigantic cock down her throat, choking her. I didn't like that though.

"What's the matter, sweetie?" Amber asked me. I didn't realize I had been staring at her.

"Oh, nothing. I'm fine," I said.

"You not fine," said Boris. "Tell us, Trevor Boy. Not have secret."

"Well, it's Rodney," I said. "I saw what he was doing to you after his money shot, Amber. That wasn't acting! That was awful!"

Amber took my hand in hers and looked into my eyes. "You don't really understand yet. Rodney is rough. He likes to be in control."

"Yeah, but he was choking you!"

"Yes, and it got him hard," she said as if things were perfectly normal.

"But that was horrible!"

"I did what it took to make him hard. That's our job."

"But it was like he was raping you!"

"He was not raping me!" she exclaimed. "If I wanted him to stop, we have a safe signal. I tap him twice, and everything stops. Do you understand?"

I looked at my food, wishing I hadn't said anything. "You mean, you didn't want him to stop?" I looked up at her, trying to understand.

She shook her head, still looking me in the eye. "Some people, like Rodney, like to be in control, and some people, like me, like it when other people take control."

"You mean, you like it when he does what he wants to you? Even when he chokes you?"

"Rodney has made me orgasm many times just by face-fucking me during fluff call. You don't understand because you're still so young and so new at this, but giving someone else that kind of control over your entire body can be an amazing turn-on for some people."

I nodded; she was right–I didn't understand. I tried to forget about it for the rest of our lunch break, and before long, we went back to work.

Chapter 6
Actor

2:00 PM, Monday, July 16

Getting ready for my first scene in St. Felix Academy. Adrian, kneeling in front of me, didn't seem to like me very much. In the classroom behind us are Malcolm, Jeanine, and Claire. To the right of the door is Robbie, my FSP for the scene.

***

I felt a little strange as I walked back to the Fluff Services locker room with Amber. She was older and taller than me, but I was a boy with a very pretty older girl in my arm. I felt a little like a pimp. Perhaps it's more accurate to say I felt like a little pimp.

Boris, Sebastian, and Jeanine had on-screen roles for the afternoon shoot. They went to their dressing rooms. I had another strange feeling as I entered a locker room for the first time to get undressed with Amber, undeniably a girl. There were no separate locker rooms for boys and girls at Frenetic Studios. We spent the whole day naked with each other anyway, so there was no need. Besides classifying, some of the actors and FSP's as boys or girls could get confusing.

We walked into the stage 7 area assigned, and Amber was teasing me and embarrassing me, kissing me on my cheeks and tickling my willy, telling me I needed to relax because I was among friends, when Randy came to me and told me he needed a word.

He took me aside and said Mr. Eastman really liked me. He said we had a very lucky break. There was a boy on another stage who was sick that day, and they needed a little boy like me to do the scene in his place. Mr. Eastman said I could have that on-camera role afternoon if I wanted. I would only be paid nine hundred quid, nothing like the thousands of pounds that the actors usually get, but it would be considered my paid audition, and that was the standard rate. It would also be paid in cash at the end of the day, along with my fluff money. That was twelve hundred quid I would be walking home with, and it scared me a bit.

If I performed well, they would approach my mother with a proper contract. I didn't understand most of this. I knew that Randy was excited, I would be on camera, and that Mr. Eastman liked me and wanted to pay me to be in a child porn movie. It also gave me a secret thrill that Mr. Eastman had been showing around some of those pictures of the Russian boys that Randy had taken the day before with me. That was how Mr. Eastman persuaded the director to give me a try.

I leaned forward and kissed Amber goodbye. She smiled sweetly as I walked away quickly with Randy. I looked back and I saw a very pretty girl in a red dress on the set. It was Annie from last night… Annie, the girl with the boy parts… the tranny girl… the very pretty tranny girl. The cute girl who made me want nothing else but air to breathe and my arms around her–or him. I remembered then that her mum had said she was doing a scene today with Boris and Sebastian.

I didn't understand why a boy would want to be a girl? I thought of Jeanine. It seemed she really was a girl. Annie seemed different. I didn't know why she seemed different. It was all so confusing.

"So who's going to fluff for Boris?" I asked Randy as we walked to stage 2. That had been my assignment for that afternoon.

"Oh, Pao Pao has agreed to stay on for that," said Randy.

"What?"

"Oh, yes. Adults in the child porn industry, especially men, get paid very little compared to you kids. Everyone wants to work with you, so they don't demand as much pay. They can make almost as much providing fluff services if they are lucky enough to find a child actor who wants an adult as their FSP."

"And Boris wants this?" I asked.

"Men have bigger mouths, and Boris has a very big cock for a boy his age, just like you."

"Oh, I see." There was so much I didn't know about sex. I was starting to feel nervous about the scene I was about to do. What if I did everything wrong? I didn't even notice his comment about the size of my cock.

"What do I need to do in this scene, Randy?"

"Oh, it'll be easy for you. You will be working with a boy named Adrian. Just follow his lead," Randy said. "The director and the stage manager will take care of the rest. You'll have very few lines, and they'll help you with them. Hurry along. We've got to get you to wardrobe."

***

When we got to the fitting room outside the costume shop, I was already naked except for the red key around my neck. "Oh, wonderful! A clean slate!" said a middle-aged woman with a broad grin full of lipstick and hair that was unnaturally curled up high into a bright platinum-blond hairdo from before the War. She ran her hands down from my ribs to my thighs and back up again several times.

"We're in luck," she said. "I've got the whole uniform in your size." She seemed to adore me with her eyes as she continued to rub my body. She reminded me more of a grandmother than a woman her age.

"We're a bit pressed for time, Nellie, so if we could just get right to it…" said Randy, to Nellie's clear disappointment.

"Oh, but he's so cute and so young," she said with a pout. "How old are ya, sweetie?" she asked in her American accent, tugging on my willy. "Nine? Ten?"

"I'm eight, almost nine," I said nervously. She looked surprised.

"He's tall for his age," said Randy tersely. "Now, can we get him kitted out? St. Felix uniform, underclassman, and do hurry. They're behind schedule."

"Ok hun, you wait right here," she said as she stepped out through a door in the back of the fitting room that led to the costume shop.

Randy rolled his eyes. "She's really a sweetheart, but she can be a bit much sometimes. She's brilliant, though," he said. "Did you see how she measured you for your costume?"

"No," I said. It hadn't occurred to me.

"That's why she was rubbing her hands all over you. She loves having her hands on you boys, yeah, but she can tell with her hands what size you are, just by feeling your body. Touching you kids like that is a gray area. She's not allowed to touch you for pleasure without asking your permission first, but employees at Frenetic are allowed to touch you if it's part of their job.

Unless you object, she is allowed to touch you like that because she can tell your size more quickly that way than by using a tape measure. It's not a standard method, so if you don't like it, just tell her, and she will not do it again. She might whimper like a kicked puppy though. Always remember who is in charge of your body."

Randy took the red key off my neck, the last item I was wearing, and suddenly I was once again aware that I was naked in a room with other people, but this time I was the only naked person. He gave the key to a young woman who then hurried out the door through which we'd entered. I seemed to be the only kid in the room. The other on-screen actors for my scene were ready and waiting for me. The young woman returned quickly, breathing heavily, with all of my clothes, neatly folded, from the locker I had used and handed them to Randy. He thanked the young woman and tossed me my Sponge Bob Y-fronts.

"You'll need to wear these… for a little while anyway," he said. "The studio wants on-screen talent to supply their own undergarments unless special undergarments are specified in the script."

"Ok," I said, putting on my undies. "Won't it look silly with Sponge Bob on them?" I asked, not feeling any less exposed.

"No," said Randy. "They look just fine. Remember, it's your job to look cute and adorable. You're a little here."

"A little?"

"Yes, a little boy, younger than Boris and Sebastian. A little is usually someone nine or under, but if they look that age, they can be quite older. You're working with Adrian in this scene. He's a little who is eleven, and he looks younger than you."

I didn't like the sound of that, being called a little, and I began to feel even more embarrassed. "Ok," I said, "I'm nine or under, so I'm a little. But cute and adorable? I thought I was supposed to be sexy! I don't want to be seen as some dumb kid that makes grown-ups want to act like they're my gran or something."

"Oh, you're going to be sexy as a little," said Randy. "That's part of what people love about child porn. You look all sweet and innocent, but then you have all this sexual energy. That contradiction is what turns people on. The more cute and adorable you are, the more turned on they will get when they see you have good, hardcore sex."

I must have begun to blush because just then, a beautiful woman came and hugged me. "I heard that you had not chosen a fluff service provider yet." She slipped her hand down inside my Y-fronts and rubbed my willy, which was stiff instantly. "I'm free this afternoon if you like," she said with a seductive smile.

Randy pulled her away and said, "We'll decide on fluff services when we get to the studio." I could hear him hissing at her in whispers as he showed her the door.

"She will get the sack for that and possibly arrested, depending on what Security decides to do with her," Randy said when he returned. "Frenetic don't hire cheap whores who lose control with our kids after a few gin and tonics over lunch. Adults here never touch kids like that without asking first."

I could tell he was angry. I hadn't seen him like that before. "If that ever happens again, tell me, or your stage manager, or the director. Tell an adult you know. Tell Eastman! That was a very serious violation." I wasn't sure what was so bad about it. I thought it felt kinda nice. "Trevor, listen. You might not understand, but this is the most important rule in our business. Adults never touch kids sexually without their permission. She did not have your permission to touch you like that. She never asked."

"You mean touching my willy?"

"Yes, that or any other kind of sexual touch. It's ok for adults and kids to play and have sex if they want, but the adult must always ask before touching you sexually, and they must be certain that you understand what they are asking. Trevor, you must promise to tell me if any adult touches you like that again without asking, and tell me even if you're not sure so we can talk it over. Will you promise?"

"But Nellie just pulled on my willy, and you saw it," I told him, still trying to understand. Lots of people had pulled on my willy that day, and it made me giggle. "She didn't ask."

Randy put his hand on his forehead and thought for a moment. "Yes, you're right, Trevor," he said. "That is the kind of touch I'm talking about. But now I have to confuse you, even more, I'm afraid." I nodded, listening carefully. "We all kiss each other on the lips here. That's not something you would just do to someone if you were at the greengrocer or something, but at Frenetic, it's understood and accepted that kissing everyone on the lips is our custom. We don't consider it sexual touch either. To us, it's showing love, or a friendly way to greet someone. It's the same with adults tugging on boys' willies. That is the one touch that we accept as normal without asking because it is used as an act of friendship or playfulness. People here don't generally consider it sexual, though to some it might be. You can still say no if you don't like it, though, and I will make sure everyone knows, but that one touch, the willy-tug, is considered ok here, as long as you feel comfortable. I'm sorry if this is confusing. Just promise to tell me if anything happens and you're not sure, ok?"

"Ok, I promise." I didn't understand that rule, but I would keep my promise because it seemed awfully important to Randy, and I felt I owed him so much. "Are there other touches that are ok here?

"Well, if you see a naked woman, it is customary for boys to give her breast a gentle squeeze, but only if you want to. And willy tugs aren't only for boys. You can do that with any naked man if you like."

"What about girls?" I asked.

"Girls are special," he said. "They don't have breasts or willies to grab, and you must never, ever insert anything into anyone without permission, so there is the one custom that goes for everybody, and that is patting their ass. Not slapping their ass, and not spanking them, just softly patting their ass, and even giving it a gentle squeeze or rub if you like, as long as it's quick and playful. It's not something adults are allowed to do to kids because it turns them on or because they want sex play. You can do an ass-pat with any naked person you meet here in the Frenetic complex, and you can expect that touch from others as well unless you say you do not want that kind of touch. Tell me, and I will make sure everyone respects your wishes. All adult employees have access to a list of kids who do not want to be touched like that, and they must never violate the wishes of kids on that list."

I was confused with how important this stuffed seemed, and I was confused with how complicated these rules were. Still, I thought Randy was carrying on a bit. I would have to treat it all as important because I wanted to make a good impression on the people in charge at Frenetic.

Nellie returned from the costume storage room with an armload of clothing for me, including short trousers, a belt, a shirt, a tie, a blazer, socks, shoes, and a black school cap. "Try these on for me, will ya hun?" she said, helping me into the clothes. When I had everything on, Nellie put her hands all over me, down my front, up my back, and everywhere else she could think of.

"How's that look to ya, Randy?" she asked. I was waiting for him to say it looked ridiculous. These were the shortest shorts I had ever seen. I was afraid the other boys would pick on me if they saw me wearing such things, but I had forgotten that my costume wasn't meant to look cool. It was meant to make me look sexy.

"Brilliant as always, Nellie," he said, pulling me in front of him to face her. "We really must dash to the set now. Thank you Nellie! Love you, mean it!" I felt his head between my bare thighs as he picked me up onto his shoulders, and we scampered off to stage 2.

***

When we arrived, I was surprised to see Jeanine, dressed in a girls' school uniform with a lovely short skirt. She ran up to me with a smile and hugged me, saying, "I heard the news! They told me you'd be here on camera! Oh, I'm so happy for you, Trevor!" She gave me a kiss on the lips.

"Thanks, Jeanine," I said, feeling more nervous than anything. "I don't know what I'm doing here, but they said there was a boy named Adrian, and I'm just supposed to follow his lead."

"That's an odd thing to say," she said. "You're his dom in this scene. On camera, he will be doing what you tell him, but I suppose he knows the script, and you don't. Come with me and I'll introduce you to him."

For the first time, I looked around the set, which was quite a bit larger than stage 7. There was an empty school classroom with a globe and an old Gramophone on the desk, and through a door in the wall to its right was what looked like a school corridor with lockers and windows.

Jeanine took me by the hand and led me quickly across the set to a boy about my size with long brown hair and stunning, dazzling blue eyes. He was dressed in the same uniform I had on, embarrassingly short trousers and all.

"Adrian," she said, "this is Trevor. Trevor, Adrian."

"Good," said Adrian. "I was hoping they'd find a cute one for me. You look the part. Has Jeanine filled you in?"

"Thanks," I said, a bit nervous. "She told me I'm your dom, and Randy said I need to follow your lead. That's all I know." Then I added, "What's a dom?"

"Sorry boys, but Judine wants a word with me. Must dash." Jeanine skipped away to speak with a woman wearing a headset with a microphone, leaving Adrian and me to talk.

Adrian tried unsuccessfully to suppress a chuckle. "You don't know what a bloody dom is? A dom is some on who… it means I follow all of your orders. You can have your way with me. I am younger than you, and at the school in the film, I am an underclassman to you. How old are you anyway?" he asked.

"I'm eight, almost nine," I replied.

"Eight? Are you serious? I'm bloody eleven!" Adrian said, looking disappointed. "You're bloody tall for your age. How are you hung?" he asked. "Only you need to fuck me at the end of the scene, and I hope you can do it."

Then, without another word, he knelt in front of me, unzipped my shorts, and pulled out my willy to look it over. He examined it, saying only, "whoa!" Then, again without another word, he put it in his mouth and began sucking it. I was hard before my cock even passed his lips. "I guess you'll do," he said. He stood up, leaving my hard cock bouncing freely in the open air. "You're so young, but you have a really long cock for your age. Not too thick, but long. I can work with this."

"Zip it up, Trevor," said Randy, approaching from behind me. "You need to choose an FSP so we can get started. We're already behind schedule."

"An FSP?"

"A fluff service provider," Randy explained. I felt a bit stupid, forgetting the name of the job I had performed all morning, but this was all happening so fast.

He took me by the hand and walked me to the fluff area, where we met a line of naked people wearing red keys around their necks, kids and adults, male, female, and trannies.

"Choose one of these so we can get going, Trevor," he said. How was I supposed to choose? The grown-up women were out, of course, but the rest looked so interesting, and I felt my cock pressing against my tight shorts as I looked them over.

Then I noticed a boy, an older, black-haired boy, tall, with no pubic hair, but he had a huge cock. It looked like a grown man's cock, but he seemed far too young for that. "Wow," I said, not meaning to embarrass him. "I mean, sorry, but, um, how old are you?"

"This is Robbie," said Randy, "and he's twelve."

"Really?" I asked. "But your… it's so big! How come…" I knew I was blushing now.

"I know," he giggled. "I get slow but steady work here because of it. A lot of people who like child porn don't want boys with huge cocks, so I need to work when I can," said Robbie in a voice that obviously had not changed yet. "Mostly, that means working with women."

"Yuck!" I said.

"Yeah, mate, too right. It's nasty work, but it's work. Mr. Eastman says he's got something in store for me though in a sequel to this film, so we'll see."

"Can I have you for my FSP?" I asked Robbie.

"Done," said Randy. "All right, clear off, the rest of you. Don't forget the Adult Division if you still want fluff work."

"Can I touch it?" I asked Robbie.

"Oh, you can do anything you like with it… er…"

"This is Trevor," said Randy.

"You can do anything you like with it, Trevor," said Robbie. "It's my job to use my body any way you like to make you hard and to keep you hard, though I don't think that's going to be much of a problem," he said, looking at the hard bulge in my shorts.

I knew I was blushing again, but I gently took his soft, long, fat cock in my left hand and stroked the top of it with my right hand, petting it gently as I would do with a cat. Randy tugged me by the jacket, and I let Robbie's cock go, noticing that it did not flop back down when I released it but stayed up where I had been holding it.

"Come on, Trevor," said Randy, "we've got to hurry now. Everybody here has been waiting for the replacement boy to arrive so they can start the shoot." He led me to the woman with the headset and introduced me.

"Oh Trevor, I'm so glad you could do this scene," said Judine with a smile. "We needed a little, and you guys are so hard to find at the last minute. Randy thinks you'll do well, but you've never worked on camera before. Is that right?"

"No ma'am," I said, shaking my head. "I only did fluff this morning. This is the first time for me. Randy said all I have to do is follow Adrian's lead."

"Well, it's a little more complicated than that," said Judine. "You have some lines in this part, just a few, and you need to be able to treat Adrian rough. Can you do that?"

"Er… What do you mean, rough?"

"Oh nothing serious," she said. "You just need to slap his face a few times, push him to the floor, and be forceful with the sex. His role is to be your sub, so his character must obey you completely. The tricky part is that you have to mean it. You have to really slap him and knock him about. You can't pretend with this or it will look like you're pretending on the film. Do you understand?"

"I think so," I muttered, not at all sure of myself. "Did Adrian say it was ok for me to slap him and stuff?" He seemed a bit rude and impatient with me earlier. How could he be ok with me slapping him?

"Why don't you go ask him what he thinks," she said. "Here," she said, handing me a thick packet of papers stapled together in the corner. It said The St. Felix Academy on the top page. "That's your script. You should go over it with Adrian." Then she turned to Randy, kissed him, and said, "I think we're ok. Thanks so much for everything, Luv!"

Randy went to the dark area behind the cameras and sat down as I walked back to see Adrian. "Judine says I need to talk to you about my part. She says I'm supposed to slap you and push you around, and I have to say lines."

"Oh, you better not act like a little pussy. If you try to be all polite with me, you'll ruin the bloody scene."

"But you want me to… I should hurt you?"

"Well, it's got to hurt a bit, or it won't look bloody real now will it," he said impatiently. "We should practice a bit. Slap me now. Give it a go." He saw I was nervous and tried to encourage me. "Make me feel it! Make the sound engineers hear it in the booth."

I slapped him nervously. "Don't be a pussy! You can go harder than that and try to look like you mean it. You've got to look mean. Maybe this will help," he said. "Your mum's a whore and your dad's the pimp who raped her!"

"Right on both counts," I said. "I don't think that's helping."

"Of course not," he said, poking my chest with his finger. "I tried to tell them this was a bad idea, having a bloody eight-year-old in this bloody role. How could a punk-ass little bitch like you know how to act!"

Everyone had been so nice to me all day except Adrian. I didn't ask for a part on camera; they asked me! Now I was all nervous and embarrassed again. He didn't understand he was making things worse and his finger-poking bloody hurt! I shoved him backward, shouting, "Piss off! I'm trying my best!" He fell to the floor. I instantly felt guilty about that. I did not mean to push him so hard.

"Exactly!" he shouted as he stood up. "That's how you need to treat me on camera, like I just said something revolting to you, I smell revolting, you find me disgusting and nasty, and you feel nothing but loathing and contempt for me."

"What?" I did not expect that kind of response from him.

"Go on, slap me, little bitch!"

I did. I slapped him so hard he spun around and stumbled to the floor. He didn't seem to understand that I was supposed to dom him unless I misunderstood what it meant to dom someone. Again, I hit him harder than I'd meant to.

I turned around as the people behind the cameras began to make noise. It was a noise that I was not expecting, and I was not sure for a moment, but I soon realized it was applause.

"That's it!" Adrian said with a smile as I turned back toward him. Then he shocked me by giving me a kiss on the lips. "Sorry I've been a bit horrible to you Trevor, but Judine said you had no acting experience. I had to give you a crash course on the method."

That was the most confused I had felt during that whole confusing day. "Who are they applauding?" I asked.

"You, you silly git!"

"What? Why? I mean, I knocked you down and they are cheering?"

"Well, not exactly. You pushed me in anger, and you slapped me in anger, but I followed through with a couple of prat falls," he said. "It must have looked smashing!"

"So you fell on purpose? I didn't knock you down?"

"Acting, my dear boy," he said pompously as he kissed me again. "I'll show you how to do those falls another time, but first we need to work on your contempt and anger, and then work them into your lines."

Adrian spent a few minutes talking to me about something called the method. I wasn't sure I understood what he was talking about, but he said the important thing was that I remember how I felt just as I was about to slap him and try to feel that way again while we were filming the scene whenever I needed to push him around or slap him or even fuck him. I needed to feel the actual anger and frustration I had felt when I slapped him – even loathing.

"Makeup!" called a voice from behind the lights and cameras. An older man with gray hair came forward with a small bag and looked at Adrian's face. He took out a small container of something and rubbed a little of it onto the boy's cheek.

"You pack quite a whallop there, laddie," he said to me in a Scottish brogue. Then he turned to Adrian and said, "You're a bit red, lad. Just a dollop of concealer and we'll have you looking right as rain."

Adrian acted as if he didn't notice the man. He just set about teaching me my lines and running them through. "It's not important to memorize them now," he said. "It's a bit late for that. You just need to learn how to say them, what kind of feeling to add to the lines."

The man held Adrian's face in both hands and turned it into the lights while Adrian was reciting his lines and I read mine. "Just a wee bit ta e'en ya up," the man said as he rubbed makeup onto Adrian's other cheek. Then he knelt down and closely examined Adrian's legs, brushing the outsides with his hands, and then applying a fine powder to them with a floppy brush. "Nice falls, laddie. No bruising at all!" With that, the man walked off to his place behind the lights and cameras.

I looked at Adrian, who had completely ignored the makeup man. I looked into his eyes and saw the most beautiful shade of blue. He had the longest, prettiest eyelashes I had ever seen on a boy. His face seemed to glow smoothly in the bright lights. Then he said, "It's your line."

Chapter 7
Scene 2

2:30 PM, Monday, July 16

The girls get to work for the remote cameras in scene 2a. The two insets are from the two remote cameras. Yes, Claire is really cumming, again. Adrian's acting skills are on display here as well. You'd think he was a naive little six-year-old, right?

***

When we had gone through our lines once, Judine called, "All right places please! Places! We are at places!"

Adrian took my hand and led me to the far end of the corridor, behind a man with a hand-held camera. Jeanine and another girl were next to us, along with a boy wearing the same uniform Adrian and I had on. I thought they all looked about 12 years-old, maybe the boy was younger. The script said they were going to start the scene in the classroom and that Adrian and I would peek through the window in the door, watch for a while, and then the two of us would fuck in the corridor.

The director called, "Ok, everybody, quiet on the set, and… roll cameras, action!"

Here it was. I was about to get naked and fuck a cute boy in front of a camera, and people everywhere would see it. I never imagined how many people would be watching or how complicated everything was. Before that day, I had never seen a porn film of any kind, and shooting a video seemed like a simple matter of pointing a cell phone at somebody and just recording. Real child porn involved large film crews with loads of equipment all pointed at the kids being filmed. For some reason, that got me even more excited!

The scene started with the three older kids walking past the guy with the hand-held camera. He followed them through the door into the classroom, where Jeanine slowly removed the other girl's skirt and blouse and helped her up onto the desk, where she pulled off the girl's knickers, shoes, and socks, and began licking her pussy. The boy sat in a chair, rubbing his cock through his shorts as Jeanine took her own blouse off, but left her skirt on.

After several minutes of doing this, with the camera operator orbiting them closely, shoving his lens in closely, the boy stood up, and Jeanine fell to her knees in front of him. She pulled his shorts down, then his underpants, and sucked his cock like an expert while he unbuttoned his shirt and jacket. He threw his tie aside, along with his shirt and jacket. I was surprised to see how muscular that boy was. I could see his muscles clearly as she worked on his cock. The camera lens was sometimes just a few inches from the boy's cock as Jeanine sucked it.

"Cut!" called the director as everyone turned to him. "Great job, everyone. Ok, let's do it again from the top. Jeanine, this time let's add some fingers in Claire's pussy, and then two in her ass. Claire, hunny? We're going to have Jeanine do two fingers in your ass. Two fingers in her ass, Jeanine, and one or two in her pussy. Remember, you two have been doing this for a while. Your characters love each other. They know how to perform for a boy.

"Jeanine, when you take off your blouse, lose the knickers as well. Roy, make sure you get some up-skirt shots of Jeanine while she's down on Claire. Jeanine, I want to see some wood for those up-skirt shots. Stroke yourself a few times while Roy is down there with the cam. Will you need fluff? No? Ok people, let's reset for take 2."

Claire was a pretty French girl with dark red hair and blazing red highlights. Her silk lace panties matched her hair precisely. Her two breasts were just beginning to come to life. She moaned somehow with a French accent. During take 2 she orgasmed when Jeanine pushed her two fingers up her ass while licking her pussy. The director seemed to like that because she was a girl. It made her scream and twitch around and even cum more during the scene. That's why he liked Claire.

***

After three takes with the hand-held camera, the director started shooting scenes using only the large studio cameras and the remote ceiling cameras, cutting each time while Jeanine was sucking the boy off. I found out after take 4 that he had accidentally cum in Jeanine's mouth. Like a pro, she swallowed it and kept on going as if nothing had happened. Apparently, Malcolm had been shooting cum for a few months now, and that's why they wanted him for this film. After take 4, when the problem was revealed, Judine yelled, "Fluff call!"

Robbie ran up to me with towels in hand and asked, "What can I do for you, Trevor?"

I looked from his smiling face down to his unnaturally huge cock and said, "I just want to play with this, ok?"

"Trevor, you tell me, you don't ask," he said. "I am your fluff boy. I do what you want."

"Ok," I said, taking his cock in my hand. Thinking about the boy cumming in Jeanine's mouth, and Jordan cumming in my mouth all those years ago, and Randy just last night, I said to Robbie, "Then I want you to cum in my mouth so I can swallow it."

"Er…" he stammered, "if that's what you want, then sure, but I think you might want to wait a little while. I can be ready for you when the next fluff call comes. We can try now if you like, but it might take more time than we have."

"Ok, then just let me play with it," I said, secretly planning to make him cum anyway.

I knelt down and took as much of it as I could into my wide-open mouth. This was bigger than Jordan's, and Robbie didn't even have hair yet. I bobbed my head up and down, not getting much of his hard cock into my mouth, but remembering how badly I wanted Brad and his friends to play with me again, and how Brad kept saying no. Back then, I was sure I would never have a cock this big to play with ever again.

Robbie started to breathe heavily. I took his cock out of my mouth and told him to spread his legs a bit, which he did. I licked my finger and pushed it slowly up into his ass and started sucking again. I wiggled my finger around in his ass as I sucked, and he gasped a few times. He looked around and asked me if I still wanted him to cum in my mouth. I didn't give him an answer. I was busy. He held a small towel under my chin and looked at me while I worked to get my prize.

The prize came to me about 20 seconds later. I had to swallow right away because more kept coming out. Some of it leaked out of my mouth, and Robbie kept it from dripping from my chin onto my school uniform with the towel. I kept sucking until no more came out. Then I sucked some more, and Robbie started giggling, saying he was done cumming. I said I wasn't done sucking.

Robbie became unsteady and started to shake. I always wondered what would happen to someone else if they kept going after they came. My young boygasms, that's a word I made up, but I bet other people have used it too, were so intense that no matter how hard I tried, I could not keep going. I slowed down and spasmed intensely.

Soon Robbie steadied himself and seemed to enjoy it again. I pulled my mouth back and let his cock go. He leaned down, licked his cum from my chin and wiped my face dry with the soft studio towel. "You're going to do really well in this business," he said with a sweet, sincere smile. "Trust me."

The gray-haired makeup man approached us, took my face in his hand, and said, "You're a thorough boy, Robbie. Dry as Her Majesty's pussy." Then he took off my cap, withdrew a small hairbrush from his bag, and brushed my hair softly but quickly. He handed the brush to Robbie and said, "Be a sweetie and bring that to cleaning, would you? There's a good lad." Robbie took the brush and kissed the man on the lips. The man put my cap back on my head and moved on to Adrian.

"Why does everybody kiss everybody on the lips here?" I asked Robbie.

"Oh, it's simple," he said. "We're in the business of making love and spreading happiness. If we live like that, we look like that in our films. It all starts with a kiss. That's a sort of motto at Frenetic." He smiled and kissed me, but it was not the normal kiss everyone else gave. He kissed me softly and slowly. When he was done, he said, "Trevor, mate, you have no idea how special you are. Everyone here sees it in you. You are going to steal this scene. Your career in this business is a lock, and you can't get that without the love of everyone you work with. Never stop being yourself."

4:00 PM, Monday, July 16

"Ok, reset for take 5. Let's reset for take 5 people, FSP's clear the set. Costume and final makeup checks, please. Lights and sound ok? Lights and sound good. Actors to your places. We are at places, please, places for scene 2a and 2b, take 5," called Judine.

I stared at Robbie, dumbfounded, as he returned to the fluff area. Why was he so incredibly nice to me? Why was everyone here so incredibly nice to me? What makes them think I'm so bloody special? And where did Robbie get such a beautiful ass?

"Trevor, you git! We're at places!" called Adrian. "That means you've got to get over here right now!" I knew what it meant, but I was too embarrassed to say anything. I just walked across to Adrian and collected another kiss.

"Ok, people, we're going to keep rolling this time," called Judine. "Boys? Trevor, Adrian? Did you hear that? Make sure to enter on your cue, and Roy stays on you with the hand-held, all right?"

I nodded while Adrian called out, "Got it!" Then he turned to me and said, "Remember, your lines are, 'Oh look,' 'Bloody hell, the girls have got Malcolm in there,' and shove, 'Blimey, you won't believe…' and after I'm on my knees and I ask if I can look, you say, 'Shut your bloody gob, you'll look when you're told,' and then slap. Got it?"

I ran through my four lines in my head twice before replying, "Got it." He kissed me again. His eyes were so pretty! I didn't want to be mean to him, but the script said I had to. Then I remembered what would happen during the scene. First, I got to watch the older kids through the window in the door while Adrian sucked my cock, and it only got better from there.

***

Jeanine sucked Malcolm's cock for a few minutes while Claire rubbed her own pussy, then the director said, "Ok, boys enter." I walked up to the window in the door, not looking at Adrian because the script said I wasn't supposed to. Adrian followed close behind me, with Roy behind us with his camera.

"Oh, look!" I said – my first line.

"Take it deep, lass," said Malcolm. He was shorter than either of the girls, but his cock was as big as Robbie's. I didn't know how Jeanine could fit so much of it in her mouth while still breathing.

Adrian patted me lightly on the ass. I had forgotten already! That was my cue! "Bloody hell, they've got Malcolm in there with the girls," I said hurriedly. I was sure the director would call cut and yell at me for blundering my line, but he didn't, and the scene carried on. Adrian came up next to me to look through the window as Roy backed away with his camera. I shoved Adrian nervously, and he fell to the floor with a look of shame on his face. "Blimey, you won't believe…" I said. Only one line left!

Adrian got to his knees as Roy moved in over my shoulder to shoot the kids in the other room changing position. Jeanine let her skirt drop to the floor, revealing her modest cock. She crawled onto the desk, straddling Claire, and sank her cock into Claire's open mouth. Malcolm stepped between Claire's legs and slid his unusually large cock into her pussy.

Adrian was stroking the back of my thigh with his left hand and rubbing my hard cock through my shorts with his right when Claire let out a very high pitched scream.

"May I have a look, Sir?" he asked.

"Shut your bloody gob! You'll look when you're told," I said to him, trying to remember the frustration and anger from earlier.

I scowled at Adrian, and then I slapped his beautiful face harder than I meant to. I could feel the stinging in my hand. I felt terrible! I could feel myself breathing hard, and suddenly all I could see was Roy's camera right in my face. My cock went completely limp. I was glad I had my shorts on still. I didn't have to have a stiffy unless I was naked.

Roy pulled his camera back and pointed it at Adrian, who was rubbing his cheek. "Yes, Sir," he muttered.

Then Adrian began rubbing my cock again. He unfastened my shorts and pulled them down slowly, rubbing the skin of my thighs gently as he did. His face was glowing red from where I had slapped him. I was so sorry, but I couldn't tell him so while the cameras were rolling. He began to pull down my Y-fronts, but I was still limp. I was in trouble. I needed to tell him how sorry I was. Then he began sucking my limp cock, slowly caressing my thighs again. I looked back at the action through the window, and I felt a shiver of excitement. Adrian was such a beautiful boy, and he was sucking my cock! And Malcolm had Claire's pussy stretched with his giant monster. I was stiff again in a few seconds.

I counted to thirty, as Adrian had told me earlier, then I loosened my tie and unbuttoned my jacket and shirt. Adrian moved his hands up to my ass and kept sucking me. I could feel my legs wobbling. I looked down at his cute face, and he smiled with his eyes. He kept smiling as he took his right hand from my ass cheek and tickled my balls.

"Cut!" called the director. "Trevor luv, that was wonderful, just wonderful," he said as he approached me. He went down on one knee in front of me and put his hand on my hip, looking me in the eye. "I know this is your first time in front of the camera, and we've put you in a complicated dom role. That's really not fair to you, but I must tell you you're doing a splendid job for us! I didn't think the studio would find anyone this good on a moment's notice." He kissed me with a smile and patted my bare ass before standing up.

I didn't know why at the time, but that made my cock really swell! I wanted to please the director, and I guess it turned me on when he told me I had done such a good job. I recalled how good it felt to be able to please Brad and his friends Chris and Jordan when I was six, how good it felt to give them something they really wanted. I guess most kids want to please grown-ups, and most grown-ups are hard to please unless you like getting a pat on the head for showing Gran a sloppy drawing of a tiger and she says, "What a lovely zebra!"

"Now, I have just a few notes for you," he said as Adrian also stood up. "I wonder if we could do this again, only this time really try to hit those lines right on cue, Trevor." I nodded as he flipped a page in his pocket-size notepad. "Also, try to stay hard. You went a bit soft after the slap." He turned a few more pages and said, "Oh yes, I have a change for you. This time, take your jacket and school tie off completely, and wrap the tie around Ade's neck." I nodded again. "Then pull up from the back. This is where we'll need to be careful. Ade sweetie, take him through the neck lift, there's a good boy. We'll get the fight captain over there to supervise." Adrian nodded.

There was so much to remember! The director turned a page back and continued, "The physical stuff was excellent, truly excellent. Great slap! But I need you to bring that kind of energy to the shove too, ok?" My jaw dropped, and I looked down at Adrian. He knew the directions were for me, but it was his job to help me get them right. I was beginning to think the director was upset with me. He had so many things he thought I was doing wrong. I went totally limp.

"Yes Sir," I said, nodding.

The director had walked off to talk to the kids in the other room when Judine called "Fluff! Come on, let's go FSP's, to your actors!"

Robbie came running up to me with towels in hand, but I was more interested in Adrian. "I'm sorry Ade…"

"Oh button it Trevor!" he replied as a tall, slender, naked blonde boy knelt in front of him. "That was awesome! New kids don't slap like that! We'll do a few more takes of this, but I promise you that's the slap he will keep in the film." The blonde boy unbuttoned Adrian's shorts and opened his fly.

Then I felt another mouth on my cock. It was Robbie doing his job. "Robbie… oh that's nice… very nice."

"Did you hear what he said about shoving me?" asked Adrian. "Really give it a go. Do it just like you did the slap. You mustn't be timid about the physical stuff, and remember, I know how to fall. The people watching have to believe in you, and that only works if you believe in what you're doing. Remember the method, ok?"

Robbie's mouth felt nice, but I was feeling nervous and a bit scared. "Ok," I replied. Then I remembered something. Nervous and scared was what always turned me on. That's why I left my clothes in the other tree. That's why I had taken so many chances yesterday with Randy and the boys.

"Now give your fluff boy's mouth a good pounding," said Adrian. "Get in the mood! Be dom!"

I looked down at Robbie, and he said, "Am I your bitch?" He put my hands on the back of his head. Robbie was older and bigger than Adrian, but I tried to do what they told me to do. I pulled his head into my pelvis and held it there. Then I held it still and moved my cock in and out.

"Trevor," said Adrian, "You're acting right now, mate, and it's obvious that you're acting. Remember the method. Don't act. You need to feel it."

I looked down at Robbie, the twelve-year-old who was serving an eight-year-old, almost nine. I had control over him. He was MY fluff boy! I became aware of feelings of contempt for him that I hadn't known before. I grabbed fistfuls of his hair and slammed his head into my pelvis. My cock was already fully inside his mouth, so I didn't make him go deeper. I just wanted to slam his head against my body and show him I was in charge. He was my bitch. I wanted to give him a bloody nose against my body!

I shoved Robbie back with my foot on his chest, and he toppled to the floor. To my surprise, he got right up and kissed me! "Well done, Trevor! Keep that attitude! You were treating me like you need to treat Adrian." I was gasping for air, and I was suddenly embarrassed that I had lost myself for a minute. "He mustn't be your friend in this scene. I know that's confusing, but you have to make him your bitch!"

"You mean," I began hesitantly, "that I need to lose control like that, and I have to make myself want to hurt him?" I asked. "This is so hard to keep straight," I said. "You guys are my new friends, but I'm supposed to treat you like this. I know we pretend for the camera, but it's so real!"

Adrian shoved the blonde boy back with his foot, as I had just done with Robbie, and said, "Acting!" The three of them laughed. I tried to laugh too, but my head was spinning with thoughts about what I had to do.

I had kept it hidden deep inside of me, but after my experience at age six with Brad and his friends, my fantasies were more related to tying people up, or being tied up, and being forced to be naked in front of other people. That's really what I thought about when I wanked until I learned what sex was. This scene was a little bit like those fantasies, especially the new bit with the tie.

"Get down, boy!" I said to Robbie, in a suddenly stern voice. He knelt in front of me, and I tied his hands behind his back with my tie. I turned him to face the cameras. "Open," I commanded as I held his chin. He obeyed. I shoved my cock in his mouth like I had done before, only this time I was hard. I was excited! I remembered my dreams from long ago, and I was living them. I pulled out before having my boygasm and slapped him to the floor. I turned around to face Adrian, ignoring Robbie.

"So, what about this neck lift thing?" I asked Adrian. "I didn't tell you to move, bitch!" I shouted to Robbie.

"Trevor!" he said, "you're going to make the director cum! Robbie's your bitch on the set, and I'm your bitch in the scene. Just keep that attitude and you've got it!"

I was hard as a rock thinking about Robbie on the floor, naked, in front of the lights and cameras with his hands tied behind his back. He was twelve, and I made him stay there in front of everyone, looking humiliated.

I was surprised at that moment to see King Khan from Sebastian's scene that morning walk up to us with a notebook.

"Hi Khan," said both boys, the slender blonde boy jumping up to wrap his body around him and kiss him passionately.

When the blonde boy had let go, Khan turned to me and said, "Hello Trevor! I saw you this morning. Boris told me all about you. He was my fluff boy, remember?"

"Yes Sir," I nodded.

"I'm not Sir here, Trevor. I'm the fight captain for this film, and we need to go over the neck lift for this scene." I nodded, feeling more than a little intimidated.

"So, you're in charge of fighting?" I asked him. "Only we're not fighting really. I'm just mean to him."

"Well, that's close," he said. "A fight captain is in charge of making sure stage combat is done safely. When you shove or slap Adrian, it might not be fighting, but it's considered stage combat. Adrian's an old pro," he said, rubbing Adrian's hair, "and he can handle slaps and pratfalls just fine. But now you have to act like you're choking him, and you need to do it properly, or else Adrian could really get hurt. You see, it's my job to see that doesn't happen."

"Yes Sir," I said nervously. "I mean, yes Khan." I didn't know how much more new stuff I could learn in one day, but I always did well in school.

"Ok Ryan, down on your knees and suck Adrian," Khan told the blonde fluff boy. "Here's how the neck lift works, Trevor." Adrian wrapped his tie around Ryan's neck and allowed the two ends to fall down his back. Good," said Khan. "Trevor, do you see how the tie covers the front of his neck, but the back is open?"

I nodded, thinking this looked pretty simple. "Ok Adrian," said Khan, "let's just do one at half speed to show Trevor."

With Ryan still sucking his cock, Adrian gathered both ends of the tie in his right hand, then pulled up on the tie until Ryan's shoulders began to lift and his neck bent forward. Ryan's face began to turn red as Adrian held Ryan's head in place. Ryan's body seemed to lift as Adrian grunted with the strain of lifting Ryan by the neck.

"Ok Adrian, release," said Khan. "Do you see that, Trevor? Looks great, doesn't it?"

"But how… I mean, he was choking, right?" I asked. "I'm not supposed to choke him, right?"

Ryan looked at me and giggled. "Of course not," said Khan. "Ok boys, one more time, this time with a slack tie."

They performed the exact maneuver, only this time, the tie remained loose and limp. Ryan's body made the exact same movements, almost like a pantomime artist. His face even turned red, and Adrian grunted as if he were lifting Ryan's full weight. "All right boys, once more, full speed, no slack." Ryan looked like he was dying!

"This is a stage," said Khan. "You are actors. It is your job to show people things. They don't have to be real things, just believable."

I nodded. It made sense, but I wasn't sure how they made that neck lift look real without being real. "This move depends entirely on a good bottom," said Khan. "Adrian is your bottom in this scene, and he's very good at the neck lift. All you need to do is hold the necktie and let him do the rest. He lifts his shoulders by straightening his back, then he lifts his body, just a little bit, by lifting with his legs. All you have to do is hold on to the tie. It will also help him if you hold his head in close to your body. Keep the slack tight on the tie, but don't pull on it. Just keep it from looking loose. Make sure to grunt too. You need people to believe you are struggling. Now you try it on Adrian. Only go half speed."

Adrian grinned at me and handed me his tie. He began sucking me, and I wrapped the tie around his neck. I looked into his eyes as I grasped the ends of the tie.

"No, Trevor, closer in," said Khan. "You need to hold it closer to the neck." He corrected my position, and I began to lift. I scowled at Adrian as I did this, but I was careful with the tie. Soon I saw his shoulders rising. "Good, good," said Khan. I pulled Adrian's head into my body forcefully, but I held the tie gently. Adrian's body was lifting. "Good!" said Khan. "Release." He patted me on my shoulders with a smile. "You learn quickly, Trevor. One last thing and this might be the most important thing you learn from me. If someone taps you twice on any part of your body, stop what you are doing immediately, got it? That's our safety signal."

Khan had us do this at full speed three times before leaving for his seat behind the cameras. "All right, reset for scene 2a and 2b, take 6. Reset for scene 2a and 2b, take 6. Makeup and wardrobe, can I have makeup and wardrobe on the set, please?" called Judine. I handed Adrian his tie, and he reminded me I needed to get mine from Robbie.

I untied Robbie, who rose to his knees with his hands behind his back and said, "Thank you, Sir, may I stand, Sir?"

"What?" I asked, not sure if I heard him right.

"You are my dom, Sir, and I obey my dom," he said. "I will do nothing without your permission, Sir, unless the stage manager or the director orders it, Sir."

"I know you're my fluff boy, but why are you calling me sir now?" I asked.

"It is proper, Sir, when one is a sub to refer to one's dom as Sir or Madam," he said.

"But I just want a fluff boy!" I said all confused now. "I want you to help me when I tell you what I need," I continued. "That's what I did when I was a fluff boy this morning."

"Sir, if you wish to release me as your sub to resume my duties as your fluff boy, I will obey your command," he said.

"Ok, I, er, command it. Stop calling me sir!"

"Ok," he said with a smile, then standing up to kiss me on the lips. "Giving someone power over yourself can be fun, and it can also be a lot of fun to have power over someone else. I wanted to stay in that role if it would help you develop your attitude toward Adrian."

"I like it, I mean, when I can order people to do things. Like, get on your knees and suck me," I commanded, and he did without hesitating.

A young, pretty Asian woman came up to me while Robbie was sucking my cock. She got down on one knee, lifted my shirt collar, and began buttoning my shirt up.

"Hello Trevor," she said. "My name is Diane, and I'm the wardrobe assistant for this film. We need to get you straightened up for the next take now." I looked down at Robbie, who acted like he didn't notice her, and then back up to her. "Of course, your fluff boy can stay."

All that day, I had been having these moments when I felt as if none of this could be real, or that it was a dream. This was one of them. I had an older boy sucking my cock while a grown-up woman was helping me with my shirt, and she didn't think anything was odd about it.

I think she saw that I was nervous because she smiled as she wrapped my tie around my neck and asked, "Do you know what my favorite part of this job is?"

I shook my head and said, "No."

"Well," she said, "it's my job to help get all these clothes on you, but my favorite part of this job is when I get to see you take them all off!" She smiled brightly. "I just love you boys," she said, "especially you littles." Suddenly I felt another hand squeeze my ass cheek. This must be one of the women Robbie had to work with.

Diane tied my necktie in a perfect knot and then buttoned up my jacket. She stood up, pointing at Robbie, and said, "I'll be back, hun. We'll finish in a few minutes."

I held Robbie's cheeks in my hands and said, "Robbie?" He looked up, continuing his services. I pulled his head back from my cock. "Robbie, is this all real?"

"Not sure I follow you, mate," he said. "It's as real as anything else. Why d'you ask?"

"Oh nothing," I said, not even sure why I asked. "But it's not nothing. I just wonder… my life seems to have changed since yesterday, and I can't go back now that I know this life is here too. I guess I just want to make sure. Is this a dream or something?"

"Oh no worries, mate, it's not nothing. I mean, it's something," he said, "something that I've seen in new boys many times. It's like, your life is fine, right, but you figure out how to wank. You love it, but you can't talk about it, right? Then you get all kinds of ideas, and they build up inside you, and you think you're going to explode. Then somehow you wind up here, and you've found a place where it's all ok, the wanking, the fantasies, everything. What's more, you find you can make people happy by doing all those things you were afraid of. Is that what you're on about?"

I nodded. "Yeah, but how'd you know all that about me?"

He laughed. "I told you I'd seen it in other boys loads of times. It's not how I got started here, mind you, but it's how a lot of boys get here." He looked on the floor where Adrian had pulled off my Y-fronts and shorts, and said with a sour face, "We should go get those unless you want Diane to put them back on you."

"I want you to do it, Robbie."

He took my hand and walked me upstage, where he held my Y-fronts as I stepped into them, and then did the same with my shorts. He smoothed down my shirt before pulling my shorts up over it, making sure it was all neatly tucked in before he fastened my belt and did up my zip.

"It's not a dream, Trevor," he said, looking me in the eye. "This is all real, and it's all wonderful!" He rubbed my cock through my shorts as he kissed me deeply and warmly.

The gray-haired makeup man came to me and fussed with my hair again. He also used a very soft, poofy brush to dab this powder on my face. "You're beginnin ta shine a wee bit, lad. This'll put ya right."

When the makeup man was gone, I told Robbie I wanted to have a word with my agent. He gave me a quick kiss and went back to the fluff area. I found Randy and whispered a special request into his ear. "Oh sure! No problem, Trevor. I'll have that set up in two minutes."

"Places, please!" called Judine. "We are at places for scene 2a and 2b, take 6. All FSP's return to your area, FSP's to your area. Craft services, craft, we need some cleanup in the camera 2 area. Craft to the camera 2 area. We are at places!"

I went to my starting position next to Adrian. I pinched his ass and kissed him, and then I began reciting my four lines in my head.

"I figured out what will really help me with this scene," I whispered into Adrian's ear. "Have a look at the fluff area."

He turned his head, and a smile stretched his cheeks open wide. A man in a gray jumpsuit was pushing a rack on wheels into position next to the fluff mattresses. This rack was shaped like a letter "X" that was about 2.5 meters tall. And there was Robbie, bound by leather straps on his legs and forearms to the rack, one limb of his body attached to each limb of the rack. He had this kind of a gag on his mouth with a ball in the front. The other FSP's stood up and surrounded my toy, touching him in ways he could not stop.

"Brilliant, Trevor!" he said, feeling my hard cock. "A fluff boy's job is to do whatever it takes, and it seems to be working!"

***

This time I got my lines almost right, I shoved Adrian so hard he didn't need to pretend to fall, I slapped him like the little bitch he was pretending to be, and I was rock hard the entire time. I glanced over at Robbie a few times to remember my power. Some of the crew had formed a queue to suck him and finger his ass. The guy in the gray jumpsuit who had rolled him out there, the gray-haired makeup guy, and even Khan took their turns, along with some of the fluff staff. I could see Robbie looking at me with his eyes as wide as saucers, and I knew it was me who put him there!

When the time came, I slowly untied my school tie and slipped it around Adrian's neck. I threw off my blazer and shirt, forced his head into my pelvis, and began to lift. I watched his shoulders rise as I pulled higher and higher on the tie. He was such a good actor! He made more sounds than when we rehearsed, but it sounded very real. He was making a sort of wheezing sound and I was just about to cum when the director called "Cut! Brilliant! Wonderful Trevor! Work a little more on that with Khan, though, will you?"

Then Judine called, "Ok, we need the fight captain! Fight captain on the set! Nurse on the set! And we have fluff call! FSP's to your actors! On-rack FSP hold in-place."

Khan walked up to me, but suddenly a young man carrying an orange box with a handle ran past him to Adrian. I looked up to Khan and asked what was going on, and he said, "You were a little rough with the neck-lift. You forgot to let him do the lifting."

I felt a wave of panic. Had I hurt Adrian? Had I hurt him so badly, he needed emergency treatment? How could I be so stupid!

"This happens with new boys, Trevor," said Khan. "You were close to an orgasm, weren't you?" I nodded, feeling shame for what I'd done to my new friend. "Well, that's natural. You can orgasm if you like at any time. You littles don't shoot anything out, so it doesn't matter too much, and you can get hard whenever you want. It's good for you to orgasm, but it's also important to remember what you're doing. You got carried away with the scene, which makes it more real, but you forgot to let Adrian be in control of the lift."

I looked over at Adrian, trying hard not to cry, and I saw the young man rubbing his neck lightly while the slender blond boy gave him an enthusiastic blow job. Adrian was giggling at the man. "Is he ok then?" I asked, turning to Khan.

"Who, Adrian? Yes, of course he's fine," Khan said with a dismissing wave of the hand. "Whenever a stunt or combat element doesn't go as planned, the actor involved has to get checked out by the nurse. It's just procedure."

What a day it was turning out to be! Everything was going from good to bad to good to bad, again and again! Making child porn movies wasn't easy!

The nurse picked up his box, and soon the gray-haired makeup man took his place at Adrian's side. Khan and I walked over to Adrian as well, and I was embarrassed that I choked up when I tried to tell him how sorry I was.

"Trevor, you bloody noob! Get over it! I nearly came in my shorts when you did that!"

Before long he had me feeling silly for worrying so much. Khan said safety is always first. Making good child porn is not worth anyone getting hurt. But it's also important to feel free to keep things feeling real. He said the director loved the take, but he had to call cut because of safety rules.

In the end, the director told me he thought we'd use the footage of that neck lift, but we wouldn't repeat it when we did more takes. He thanked me for my hard work, and he told me he was asking too much of me already. He wouldn't expect me to learn anymore combat that day.

Then he took my hand and walked me over to Robbie's rack. "You really are a natural, aren't you Trevor," he said with a smile. Robbie looked at him, unable to speak. Then the director gave Robbie's cock a few tugs and said, "Keep up the great work! You're in the sequel, Robbie. I just got word from Eastman, and he's approved the script. You're in, and it's called Robbie's New School. You've got your first title role!" Then he walked away as if nothing had happened, leaving Robbie to just stare at me.

***

We reset for take 7, and this time it was scene 2b through the end of 2c. That meant while Adrian was sucking me, the kids in the other room had one more position change. First was Claire's huge orgasm, her eighth during our shooting that day, then Jeanine would bend over the desk while Malcolm fucked her ass. When he started fucking Jeanine's ass, I shoved Adrian back one more time and just pointed to the floor. That was his signal to undress completely and bend over in front of me while I fucked his ass.

This didn't go quite as planned either. This time I came while Adrian was sucking me, and I made a little too much noise. Well, you could say I squealed–I couldn't help it! They let Robbie off the rack so he could come to talk with me and get me hard and horny again, which meant more of that special Robbie blow job, as only he could do.

We did a total of 12 takes, and I came twice more, each time in Adrian's ass like I was supposed to. I tried not to look at Roy or his camera, but it was weird having his camera in my face while I was cumming. I know I made a lot of squeaky noises, and I had no idea what my face looked like. Adrian didn't cum at all, and neither did Jeanine. It wasn't in the script.

I learned there was a tradition at Frenetic Studios for on-screen actors who do not cum in their scenes. They get together on the set and fuck in front of the cast and crew until everybody cums at least once. Usually, they are on a table, or in this case on a desk, and everyone in the cast and crew crowds around them, putting their hands somewhere on their bodies. Jeanine and Adrian just sucked each other off in the 69 position. I wasn't very tall, so I couldn't reach very far into the crowd, but somehow Adrian's hand found mine. He came very quickly as he squeezed my hand. It was hard to see, but I know he glanced at me as he swallowed Jeanine's small load.

Chapter 8
The Offer

5:30 PM, Monday, July 16

Mr. Eastman cleared the conference room and asked Markus to stand on a chair to take this picture to celebrate my first contract offer with Frenetic Studios, Children's Division. That's Mr. Eastman on the left, then Randy, me, and Robbie. I wanted Robbie to be in the picture too because he had been so helpful that day, and I was going to have a prominent part in his new series.

***

All of us kids who were in the scene were still naked, mostly. Inez went around the set, picking up our clothes and putting them into a hamper. Then she came around to each of us to take our hats and socks and whatever odd items we still had on.

"What about my Y-fronts?" I asked her. She smiled at me and told me Sponge Bob would be cleaned and dry in an hour.

"Great work, people! Great work," called Judine. "That's a wrap on St. Felix Academy scene 2. The following are released," she continued, "makeup, fluff services except for Robbie, sound and lights are released, camera crews, thank you very much, you are released as soon as you stow your gear, and all actors except for Trevor, please stay behind hun. The rest are released."

Adrian smiled his way over to where I was standing and kissed me so very sweetly before saying, "Great job today, mate! I'll see you at tea downstairs."

"Tea?"

"Yeah, it's tea time, you great pillock," he said with a smile, pointing at the clock. "And we're not going anywhere before we get our undies back from the laundry. I expect they'll get you to tea when they're done with you here."

"Right, see you there," I said as he walked away.

***

There I was again, completely naked in a room full of adults who were all dressed. Randy had led me back through the office area to the studio's conference room. He was now chatting with a small group of adults. Robbie came up behind me and gave me a big hug with a lovely kiss.

"Blimey, Trevor! You're such a bloody natural! Where did they find you?" he asked. He was the only other person who was naked beside me; only he still wore his red key around his neck.

"What d'you mean?" I asked him. "I made loads of mistakes, and I even hurt Adrian, sort of.

"Listen, Trevor," said Robbie. "They want to talk to you. They called you to the conference room. You're in, mate! You're a cert in this business if you want it."

"Help yourselves to refreshments, boys," said Judine as she left the room. There was tea, fairy cakes, egg and cress sandwiches, and Mr. Eastman's favorite bagels with cream cheese.

As he entered the room, Mr. Eastman said with a proud smile and a booming voice, "Trevor! Robbie! Please sit down, won't you?" Robbie patted my ass as we sat down, a sly smile on his face.

Mr. Eastman stood up and spoke. "Boys, ladies, and gentlemen, I have two announcements. First, as some of you may know, I have given final approval on a script for the sequel to St. Felix Academy, but you might not know that it will feature our own Robbie Mason here in the title role. The film is called Robbie's New School." There were applause and some cheering, and Robbie seemed to blush a bit.

"We have established our unique school in this present film, and Robbie will play a London schoolboy who's recently moved to Dingwall. If everything goes well, this could become an ongoing series. Robbie, you have done much outstanding work for us in the past, and we believe now that we have found a way to put your extraordinary assets to work in a way the public will really like." More applause. I think everybody but me knew his assets meant his huge cock.

"Thank you, Sir!" said Robbie. "I've loved my time here at Frenetic. I won't let you down, Sir!" Still more applause.

"Now," said Mr. Eastman, "now I want to talk about a phenomenon that cannot have escaped anyone who worked on or visited stage 2 this afternoon. I'm talking, of course, about our new discovery, young Mr. Trevor Hawkinson here!" This time the applause was quite loud and accompanied by cheering. Randy and Robbie were cheering me, each proud of his involvement in my first scene.

When things calmed a bit, Mr. Eastman looked at Randy and said, "Mr. Christianson brought Trevor in as a new recruit just this morning. I agreed we should start him right away as a fluff boy. Just look at him. Stand up for us, would you please, Trevor? You can all plainly see how effective his services would be–and the boy has potential!" He walked over to me and offered me his hand. Then he led me slowly round the table.

"I want you all to take a good look at this boy. Look at the grace in his walk– so unusual in a boy only eight years old. Look at his lines and his curves. Look at the life in his smile! Remember his age. If he looks as astonishingly beautiful at age eight, imagine the elegant body he will grow into over the next year or two. Then at age twelve. I believe he will still be our star at age thirteen if nature cooperates by not rushing his puberty along too fast.

"You have all seen boy beauty under development, and you know what is sure to come with young Trevor here. Great things, I assure you. Great things! He is a long-term investment indeed for a boy porn star. No, a boy porn superstar!" The strange grown-ups were all turning and smiling at me, looking me over from top to bottom, as I walked past them.

"Trust me," said Mr. Eastman, "the day will come when sculptures of this boy's body will appear atop the Willy awards themselves!" He led me back to my chair between Randy and Robbie.

I sat down, my chair facing sideways, and Mr. Eastman leaned over, looking me closely in the eye. "Trevor my boy," he said, "we put you in a risky situation this afternoon, and we didn't know how you would handle it. Mr. Christianson and I talked it over, and we agreed you should be given a chance to jump in at the deep end of the pool, so to speak.

I can reveal to you now that we were ready at any moment to shut down the production at any time this afternoon if you seemed unable to perform as we asked, or if you seemed overwhelmed emotionally by what must have seemed to you a rather… bizarre role, that of bullying another little… another boy." He seemed to be making a speech now.

"Trevor, the people you see around this table are the investors and owners of Frenetic Studios, and a few of our solicitors," Mr. Eastman said, gesturing around the table. "Remember, the reason for this little meeting here is twofold. First, we wanted to announce our plans for young Robbie here and to congratulate him on what we know will be a successful new franchise for our studio." Another brief round of applause for Robbie.

"Second, I wanted to introduce you, our new phenom, as it were, to these wise, and might I add wealthy," he said with a slight chuckle, "men and women. I want them to know who they are getting when they see the name Trevor Hawkinson in the credits of a Frenetic film.

"Now Trevor," continued Mr. Eastman, "Randy here is your agent. We say that he 'discovered' you. It shall be his job to see that you get all the right roles in the right films and that your exposure and publicity are adequate for a star of your caliber. It's also his job to coordinate your scheduling and see to your development in this business, should you accept the offer I'm about to make on behalf of these good ladies and gentlemen."

A soft murmur went round the group, followed by complete silence. Randy took my hand.

"Trevor, you must understand that an agent puts a great deal of time and effort into developing your talent. That is why an agent gets paid some of the money you will earn. Agents in this business normally make 20% of the actor's pay. That means that if you earn ten thousand pounds, you would normally have to give two thousand to Randy.

"But I have something special in mind for both of you. In the deal we are proposing, you will only pay Randy 10% of your earnings and bonuses, and we will pay him an additional 20%, so you both will earn more. We want you to sign with Frenetic, Trevor Hawkinson, and we are willing to pay for you. It's a one-year deal, with a minimum of 21 scenes. You will be paid five thousand pounds for your first scene under this contract, and a thousand more for each subsequent scene until you reach a maximum of fifteen thousand per scene. These are the standard boy-boy rates. Your pay will go up or down depending on what you do in the scene, and with whom you do it. You will find a variety of kink and fetish bonuses if you wish to pursue those as well.

"Mr. Christianson has acted on your behalf, as your surrogate, unsigned agent, you might say, during the negotiation of your contract. He persuaded us to limit the contract to a single year, as he thinks your brand will be worth even more during next year's renegotiations. He is a very clever man, Trevor, and there is no one who knows the child pornography business better than he.

"In addition, he will cost you less than any other agent due to the reduced commission he negotiated for you. I strongly recommend you agree to the portion of this contract that assigns him as your agent in an official capacity. He will not try to persuade you one way or the other because he stands to make a great deal of money based on your decision on that matter. I should not try to persuade you to accept any part of this contract for that very reason, but forgive an old buffoon his excitement at having found such a dear treasure as yourself.

"Trevor my boy, if you perform only the minimum number of scenes in this contract, your payment will be £260,000, less Randy's agency fee of £26,000, for a total of £234,000. Now how does that sound? You are only bound to do 21 scenes, at four hours per scene, that's a minimum of 84 hours you'll be required to work under this contract, which comes to an average of £2,785.71 per hour. Not bad, I should think, for part-time work. I think that outstrips even our finest solicitors!" A chuckle went around the room.

"That is our offer, Trevor Hawkinson, which I present to you on behalf of Frenetic Studios. You should consider it carefully, but you should also know this is the most generous contract we have ever offered to a new boy or girl in our Children's Division. You truly are one special boy Trevor. I think congratulations are in order."

I thought it all sounded extremely confusing, but he said I would make thousands of pounds for these films. I liked that!

There was more cheering, and Robbie and Randy both shook my hand and kissed me happily.

We all stood as the meeting was over, and Mr. Eastman walked up to me with another man in a suit. "Trevor," Mr. Eastman said, "This is Markus Kramer."

"Hi Mr. Kramer," I said, shaking his hand.

"Call me Markus, please."

"Trevor, Markus here will act as your solicitor in these matters," said Mr. Eastman. "He is employed by a nonprofit organization called Kids Coming Up, but he works for you, not us. He will be paid by KCU, and it is his job to see that you receive the best legal services you can get as you begin your career. That is very important.

"When children start out in this business, they are vulnerable to shady producers and abusive practices. We would never tolerate such things here at Frenetic. All the same, we want you to have every protection. It is standard practice in reputable pornography studios to provide their child actors with an independent solicitor during their first year, and other studios and us do that by funding Kids Coming Up, which in turn employs solicitors like Markus and many other various professionals."

I looked at him quizzically. I had absolutely no idea what he was talking about. "That means that before you decide whether to accept our offer, Markus will go over the contract with you to make sure you understand what we will expect of you, and advise you whether he thinks you should negotiate any point of the contract. He will also accompany you to present the contract to your mother, along with our solicitor, Mr. White. If everything goes well, and you do join the Frenetic family, Markus will serve as your solicitor for one year. He will represent you in all legal matters, even in those not pertaining to your work here. After that year is up, you have the option to retain his services at your own expense, or he can represent another client through KCU if you choose not to do so."

I simply nodded. I couldn't think of anything to say. I was completely confused by all this solicitor talk, but he seemed nice enough.

***

"Don't worry too much about the contract," Randy said as we went downstairs to join the others for tea and to wait for our undies to finish in the laundry, "The studio has solicitors who specialize in these contracts. Markus has done several of them himself. They make them look nice and friendly for Mum, or lengthy and confusing if they think that will work better, and then they put most of your money into a trust. She doesn't even have to know how much you're earning, let alone the types of films you're making – if you don't want her to know, but you should plan on her finding out soon, and ideally, it will be at a time of your choosing. They do this all the time. They will come with us to your flat tonight and get your mum's signature, and everything will be done, all right?"

"So quickly?" I asked.

"If you like," Randy answered. "Or, we could wait if you prefer."

"Oh, no, that's ok," I said. "It's just so fast. I only met you yesterday, and now it sounds as if they want to make me into a film star or something."

"That's right, Trevor," he said with a wink, "They do."

Chapter 9
Dressing Room

6:00 PM, Monday, July 16

The Undies Game is a great way to unwind after a day of filming. That was when I got my first really good snog from Annie, my first boyfriend. Maybe it was puppy love, but those feelings can be very strong.

***

The tearoom was a garden level room, just beneath the costume shop. It was not at all what I had expected. Instead of couches and armchairs and tables with tea sets, it was filled with cushions and lounges and mattresses and bean bags. There were about two dozen naked kids and two tea waiters in formal uniforms.

Randy nudged me into the room and said, "This one's kids only, Trevor. Enjoy yourself!"

In a day that had been filled with surprises, I had no idea what to expect. At the far end of the room was a large plasma screen TV with two boys playing some kind of video game. Two girls and a boy were doing a sort of dance as they chanted a rhyme. Then there was a large pile of flesh in one corner, which turned out to be maybe eight boys having group sex next to a smaller pile of girls doing likewise and a mixed group of boys and girls bridging the two piles. Finally, there was a group of boys and girls in the center, sitting in a circle, enjoying tea and cakes. One very small girl with long, brown hair was idly rubbing her clitoris as she talked and sipped her tea.

"Trevor Boy!" I saw a hand waving from the center of the room.

"Boris! Great to see you!" I said.

I didn't know much at all about girls' pussies, but I knew about wanking, and my dumb brother Ian once told me that girls wanked by sticking things into their pussies. I didn't believe him because he was always having me on, so I had asked Boris earlier when he and I were alone. I knew he wouldn't make fun of me for not knowing.

He had told me, "Girl not all times put thing in pussy. Most time rubbing clitoris." He told me where the clitoris was, and he had even pointed it out on a few girls earlier that day. I was glad he did, because otherwise, I would think this small girl with long, brown hair was rubbing her pussy because it was sore or something. I still wasn't sure how I felt about pussies.

"Trevor?" coughed a voice from the corner. "Trevor Boy? Is you?"

"Take dick from mouth, Sebastian!" yelled Boris. "Must come say hello for Trevor Boy!"

"Is no dick. Not sure what have in mouth." With some effort, Sebastian extracted himself from the boy pile, throwing banana peels off his shoulders and head, and a neatly uniformed waiter brought a bath towel to him and toweled him off.

Boris and Sebastian kissed me, and we sat down. Then I saw her. Or him… "That Annie," said Boris. "You meet him last night. He do scene with we two today."

"Hi Annie," I said, sure I was blushing. Boris had used the word "him" when talking about her–or him. Could I dare ask Annie which was the right word? Would I sound stupid? I would have been devastated if I'd done something stupid and lost her–Him.

"Oh look for him Boris!" giggled Sebastian. "So cute how he like Annie!"

I nearly died from embarrassment as once again, my cock was hard as a rock. Even when Annie was naked, she looked like a girl; only she had a penis. I thought what it must be like to do a scene with Annie. I thought I could spend the rest of my life with her, and I would give everything I had just to touch her…

Then she stood up and kissed me, and the world changed again.

She pulled me down to sit next to her. She pulled my arm around her shoulder and snuggled into my chest. Her skin didn't feel like human skin. It looked soft and creamy. It felt soft and creamy. Her legs were long and elegant. She was slender, but she wasn't skinny. I was too nervous to know what to do next. I didn't know why Annie made me feel this way.

"Oh Trevor, you're so sweet!" she said. "Just feel it. Enjoy it if it feels good! I'll be your friend, ok?"

How could I be friends with an angel? That's what Annie was. My cock was hard, but I didn't want to fuck her. Or him. I wanted to cuddle her, to kiss him, and to caress every part of her body.

"Didn't you get enough action on the set today?" she asked me as she took my cock in her slender, graceful hand.

"Oh no! I mean yes! I mean, it's not that," I squeaked out. "I mean you're, you're so…" I didn't know what to say, but Boris and Sebastian were giggling. "I mean, I like you a lot. I think…" This was so embarrassing! "No, wait! I like you a lot, but I just met you, and I don't know why I like you so much."

Now Annie was giggling too, but he was giggling in a nice way. He was blushing just a bit, and he kissed me. Did she kiss me or did he kiss me?

"You're really sweet, Trevor," he said, "and I think you're really cute too." I know I blushed even more, and my cock swelled in his hand.

Soon Robbie and Adrian joined us, along with Jeanine and Claire. Malcolm went to join the boy pile. We talked about St. Felix Academy and Robbie's starring role in the new sequel. Then we talked about my contract offer. No one seemed surprised.

"We tell for you Trevor Boy!" said Sebastian. "You do very well, no?"

"Yeah," echoed Robbie and Adrian.

I still didn't get it. I was only eight, getting close to nine, but what was this weird thing about me that made it so obvious to everyone in the child porn world that I was special, but all my life I've been seen by everybody else as nothing more than my older brother's little brother? I thought of them and boldly grabbed Annie's ass and squeezed it. When she looked up at me, I kissed her. My time had come!

***

Inez, Esmeralda, and several other members of the laundry staff pushed their carts into the room, loaded with clothes of all sorts, girls and boys. "All right kids! Djou all know how this work!" called Esmeralda, who was apparently in charge.

"Boys!" she shouted to the boy pile in the corner. "Pay attention or you never gonna get your undies!"

The boys rolled off from each other, revealing the long, slender, elegant, blonde fluff boy Ryan at the bottom, covered in mashed banana goop and peels and having an unpeeled banana poking out of his ass like a turtle's head.

"Oh no, Ryan," said Esmeralda, "I no gonna clean your clothes again if you gonna make a mess like that!"

"It's ok, Auntie," said Ryan in his squeaky Irish accent. "I just did fluff work today. Undies only."

Malcolm yanked the banana out of Ryan's ass, and Inez threw him a bath towel saying, "Thanks to God I'm not the janitor tonight!" Several more boys from the pile came to Inez's cart to get towels to wipe themselves off.

"All right kids, ready?" asked Esmeralda.

"Yes, Auntie," they all said in unison. I had no idea what they were ready for or why they called her "Auntie."

"Ok, here we go," she said. She held up a pair of girl's panties, plain white, with a red lace around the waistband and leg openings.

The kids began shouting names. "Amber! Jeanine! Ryan! Annie!"

On hearing her name, which was shouted by Sebastian, Annie stood up, gave Sebastian a slow, deep kiss, then took her undies from a smiling Esmeralda, along with the rest of her freshly cleaned and neatly folded clothes. They were girl undies and girl clothes, so maybe they were 'her' clothes.

She gave Esmeralda a kiss and said, "Thank you, Auntie." She came back to sit with me, whispering to me, "You just guess who the undies belong to, and then you get a kiss if you're right. It's a fun way to end the day, nothing more."

Esmeralda held up a pair of plain blue Y-fronts with white trim. I knew them! "Malcolm!" I shouted. I had seen them removed from him many times that day.

Everybody applauded as I got up to kiss the cute, though intimidating, short boy with all the muscles. He kissed me strongly, but not roughly. His muscles felt a little softer than they looked, and he gave me a sweet smile and said, "Welcome to Frenetic, new boy!" He was obviously Scottish. He took his Y-fronts and his neatly folded clothes from Esmeralda, kissed her, and said, "Thanks Auntie" before sitting down.

And so it went, with Esmeralda holding up undies and the kids all guessing. At one point, she lifted a pair of pink silk lace bikini panties, and before they reached her shoulder level, Malcolm said, "Ryan."

It was not a guess. It was a declaration, a pretty impressive one too, given that the actors never see the fluff staff wearing their undies. "Now give us a kiss, Irish, ya great poofter," Malcolm said as he approached Ryan. Ryan made a show of obeying Malcolm, accepting Malcolm's finger up his ass during their kiss. He took his panties from Esmeralda, gave her a "Thanks Auntie" kiss, after which Esmeralda licked her lips and smiled at Ryan.

"Djou a real messy boy, Ryan, but you taste good of bananas, and I love you bananas!" said Esmeralda. Ryan folded the panties carefully and went back with Malcolm to lie across his lap.

"Now boys, playtime is done! I no gonna do no more laundry for djou today!"

Next, Esmeralda held up my Sponge Bob Y-fronts. Boris and Sebastian just smiled at me. Why weren't they saying anything? I thought they'd know for sure. Boris winked, and Annie yelled out, "Trevor!" We stood up, and I think there was applause. I can't remember much. I just remember Annie's lips and her soft skin, and her absolute perfection.

When you're only eight, almost nine, you're not supposed to fall in love, but you can definitely have very powerful feelings. I don't know if I was in love with Annie, but I was definitely infatuated with her. I wanted to be with her. I wanted to touch her, to kiss her, to look at every part of her, and to feel her touching me. I didn't feel like I needed to have sex with her, but that would be incredible too. Well, more than incredible, but I didn't dare dream it. I just had to be with her, and I needed her to like me.

"Hey!" shouted a voice from reality. "Djou gonna get these clothes or djou gonna stand there all day keessing?"

Oops! I didn't want to make Esmeralda mad. I turned to her, and she handed me my undies, and then the rest of my clean, folded clothes. I said, "thanks," turning to sit down. Several of the kids stood up and turned me around. Esmeralda was standing with her arms crossed, a stern yet kind look on her face.

"Come back here, Trevor," she said, pulling my head into a hug. "We always show love here. Love is the most important thing everybody do here. I help you learn these things if you wanna learn them from me, but you also learn them from everybody."

I could tell that she wasn't angry. She wasn't lecturing me. She was teaching me. "When I give you your clothes, I give you love. Smell how fresh they are, and look how nice my girls fold them for you. That is love, mi chico! I have been here in Frenetic children estudios longer than anyone, even longer than Meestar Eastman. That is why everybody call me Auntie. Even Meestar Eastman he call me Auntie. You show love when you kiss me, and you show love and respect both when you call me Auntie, ok?"

I nodded and kissed her, saying, "Thank you, Auntie." She held me in a hug for a few seconds longer.

"Djou gonna be a big star here, Trevor, A great big star." Yet again, people started clapping when she said that. I wish I knew what it was that made me so special.

Next, Esmeralda held up a pair of undies that looked like panties, but I thought they might be for a boy. They were solid red satin. They consisted of a waistband that was maybe an inch wide, with front and back panels that didn't connect with each other. The only thing that went over the hips was the waistband. I looked around to see who these belonged to, because they looked very sexy. "Sebastian!" called Annie. They got up and kissed, then Sebastian sat down with his clothes, and Annie returned to my heaven.

"We just did that scene together," whispered Annie. "I'm surprised you didn't get the answer. Didn't you just spend the night with them?

"Yeah," I said, "but I was a little nervous about today, and I guess I didn't pay attention when he got dressed." I became lost for a minute in reverie, wondering what Sebastian would look like wearing those satin undies, and how I could possibly have missed the moment of massive sexiness when he'd put them on.

"It's probably best," Annie said. "You're not supposed to guess if you're staying with the person, but they'd let you get away with it. You're the new boy that everyone is just crazy about."

7:00 PM, Monday, July 16

We left the tearoom, and I learned I had a dressing room because I was onscreen that afternoon. The FSP's couldn't go with us unless an actor placed them on a special guest list. While we had dressing rooms to go to, they went to the FSP locker room and then home

Before we went to our dressing rooms, we went through the tea room exit in the rear, which led upstairs one level to a huge, luxurious bath and shower hall. There were dressing room doors up and down both sides of the long, rectangular room, showers along the two short walls, at least eight Jacuzzis, and a large pool in the middle.

"Hey! It's the kids!" called a voice from the pool. "Hey, kids!" called another. There were naked men and women in the pool and taking showers. We walked past a woman who was on her knees, sucking a man's cock. None of the kids seemed to notice them.

Esmeralda and Annie were walking me to my dressing room. "Now remember Trevor," said Esmeralda, "no hanky panky stuff in the hot tubs or the pool, and always take a shower and clean everything offa you little body before getting into the pool or the hot tubs, ok?"

"Yes, Auntie," I said. I kissed her, and she opened the door to my dressing room, then left, humming as she walked. I thought she must really like her job.

"You can put your clothes in here while you clean up," said Annie. "I'm going to put my things in my dressing room, and if you like, we can meet at the showers at this end."

"Ok," I said. "I'd like that." I knew that was an understatement. I wouldn't just like that. I wanted that. I needed that. My life would end if that didn't happen.

The door to my room had a star on it, as all the dressing rooms did, and there was a sliding name plaque that said, "Trevor Hawk." I stepped inside, and a light turned on automatically. It was just like I'd seen on TV. There was a makeup table with a chair and a mirror with lights around it. There was a couch along the back wall, a coffee table surrounded with chairs, a huge plasma TV with a complicated remote, my own bathroom, with yet another tub and shower, and on top of a mini-refrigerator was a bucket of root beer on ice with a note that said 'Welcome to Frenetic, Trevor! We wanted to provide a beverage to your liking. Your agent suggested root beer. There are snacks and more beverages in the refrigerator. If you need anything, including a different beverage selection, dial 222 and let us know. There is a phone on your coffee table and one on your makeup table.'

Life as a child porn actor just kept getting better and better!

There was a sign on the wall next to the door I had just entered with a list of rules for the bathing facilities:

Always shower before entering the pool or Jacuzzis.

No clothing is permitted in the pool or Jacuzzis.

Sex play is not permitted in the pool or Jacuzzis, though you may do so in other areas.

This facility is for the use of actors only

If anything nicer happened to me that day, I thought I would just pass out. I had a contract offer to do what I loved more than anything, I was going to make a lot of money, everybody thought I was special, I was treated like a star with a luxurious dressing room, and I met Annie! On top of everything that happened yesterday, I couldn't imagine how things could have been any better, ever! My imagination simply wasn't large enough yet.

***

I met Annie in the shower area, as we had planned. She turned me to face her and kissed me sweetly, warmly, then passionately. Then she looked me in the eyes and said, "I don't know why I feel this way, Trevor. Maybe it's your sweetness or your innocence or just your cuteness, but I want to hold your body, and I want you to hold mine."

She felt the same way? She didn't know why either? I reached behind her and turned the shower water on, suddenly splashing her pretty face, which lit up with giggles.

"Annie," I began, "I have felt like that since last night when I met you. I didn't understand how a boy could want to be a girl, but I know now it's just not important to understand why. You are so pretty and so soft. I've never met a girl or a boy who makes me feel like this. I want to touch you. It's weird. It's not like being horny. It's a lot more powerful than that."

"Yeah, I get it, Trevor," she said, kissing me. "Let's get in the hot tub, want to?" We slid into the warm, churning water, which felt nice on my cock. "One thing I want to tell you Trevor, is that I'm a boy. I don't want to be a girl. I just want to be pretty, and I think I look pretty when I look like a girl. Does that make sense?"

It made a lot of sense. It explained why Annie felt so different from Jeanine. It might even have explained part of my attraction to her because I've always liked boys. "Yeah," I said. "It even makes you prettier, being a real boy and not a girl like Jeanine and you are so, so pretty," I said as we fell into a kiss that defied time.

We must have been there for a long time because Randy came through the door to my dressing room looking for us. "There you are!" he said. "It's half-past seven!" Annie's eyes got wide as he looked at me.

"Annie, your mum's waiting in the lobby. Trevor, Boris and Sebastian are also in the lobby. It's time to go, Kiddo."

"Ok, we're coming," I said as I kissed Annie deeply and climbed out of the hot tub.

Later that evening, Monday, July 16

Things were a blur for a while. Randy, Markus, and Mr. White, who hated his first name, Virgil, so everybody called him Mr. White, rode home to Mum's flat with me in a limousine. Boris and Sebastian came along too. The solicitors presented Mum with a contract to sign that would pay her a thousand quid each month directly, which would not come out of my pay, and which I knew would all go into gin and tonic and new toys for Wonder-Boy Ian.

She had no control over the money I made for my movies. That went into my trust, with another thousand each month originally meant to go into my pocket. "That will go into your college fund, young man," snarled Mum, who had no intention of letting me keep any of it.

That part of the contract was really meant to make Mum think she had another way to keep me poor and unhappy. It wouldn't work, though. Markus had negotiated many of these contracts, and he used language to prevent Mum from getting any of the real money, but still letting her think she would be depriving me of my thousand quid. She had no idea how tiny that amount was compared to what I would actually make, but then neither did I.

Randy was named my agent and my trustee, and somehow he got legal powers over me to make medical decisions and the like. At the time, I didn't fully understand what that meant, but I would understand before the week was over. Mum would have no idea how much money I was really earning above the thousand quid I got each month, nor did she know what kind of movies I was making– yet. Randy would make sure I had enough spending money. If I needed anything else, I would just ask him.

All that complicated contract talk made me want to run outside and scream. Money had always made me anxious for some reason. I asked Mum if I could take Boris and Sebastian to the bedroom I shared with Ian. She just waved me off like a bluebottle fly.

"Nothing same again for Trevor Boy," said Boris with a smile that made me want to lay him down on Ian's bed and kiss him. So I did.

"No boys, must not get troubles with mum of Trevor Boy tonight," said Sebastian. "Too important, I think."

I hugged and kissed Sebastian too. "I'm just so happy I can't help it!" I said. "I love you both, and thanks so much for helping me with everything!"

Epilogue

I did not sleep at Mum's place again for the next two years. I learned soon how bad it was for me to live with Mum in the state she was in. It was the beginning of my own life, the life that belonged to me, and no one else. I did one final scene for St. Felix Academy with the bigger kids, which you'll read about in part 2 of these memoirs, and I was excited about working with them again in Robbie's New School. I was also excited about making so much more money than what seemed evident in my contract!

Randy and Mr. Eastman had big plans for me. I would be working a lot, and I would be able to leave my horrible school and work with a tutor at the school on the studio lot. I would get to travel to promote the videos with autograph sessions, live performances, and interviews. I even gave a talk to a group of Boy Scouts and Girl Guides, telling them all about making child porn movies. Most of them giggled a lot and some said "eew," but some were interested, very interested.

We brought two of the boys and one of the girls upstairs to my hotel room with their parents to do a quick one-camera scene with them, a sort of introduction to making child porn. One of the boys got frightened by the camera and decided he didn't want to go through with it, so his mum brought him back downstairs to the rest of his group while the three of us had a great time with Randy and his camera. They were each paid £900 because the scene was considered their on-camera audition. The boy really seemed to like the girl, which was fine with me. He was cute, and my cock was still small enough that I could fuck his ass without it hurting him.

But I'm getting ahead of myself.

Much love!

xxoo

Trevor

Introduction
Part 2

Hi. My name is Trevor Hawkinson or just Hawk. I am twelve years old, and I am one of the most successful and prolific actors in the child pornography business. I suppose it's easy to make that claim when no one can say what that means, but Bill, my press agent, says my cock has been seen by more people in more countries than any other cock in porn history. He says I passed Ron Jeremy nearly a year ago after I had only been in the business for three years.

Soon I will be too old to star in my own child porn films. When a boy hits puberty, his voice drops, and he starts to get a little hairy, he can still be in child porn, but he is usually the older friend who takes the cute, younger boy under his wing. They are nice films, some of them can be very touching, and I'll be working with some really sweet littles that way, a 'little' is a child porn actor under age ten or one who looks that young, but I will no longer be the star. People buy those films to see the cute young boy get fucked by a big teenage cock, not because they give two shits about the teenager attached to the big teenage cock. I'm not complaining at all. I have been the cute young boy that everyone loves for years now, and I'll still have those roles for maybe another year.

This business has been very good to me, and no boy has gotten more from it than I have. Once my voice drops, the only real way to keep getting starring roles would be to work more with women or do kinks and fetishes. Those videos don't sell nearly as well as child porn.

I don't like the idea of switching to women or kinks and fetishes, and I certainly don't need the money. Still, I love this business, and I'll be able to continue working with all the wonderful people I've come to know and love at Frenetic America Studios, Children's Division. Any film featuring an actor under age eighteen is produced in the Children's Division at Frenetic America, unlike our UK parent studio. The number is sixteen, so the Children's Division will produce every film I make for several years to come.

I will also be able to work in the Children's Division well into my adulthood as the grown-up who likes to fuck cute young boys, but those parts are hard to come by, and they pay very little. That's ok, though. I think I'll always be happy to work with cute boys, even for free. Everyone wants to fuck the cute young boys, but since I've been so successful and done so much for Frenetic, I will probably be able to get those roles regularly. Some of my fans now will still want to follow me, maybe to see if I bring up any new young protégées or have kids of my own who will want to make child porn.

Should I continue with starring roles with women or kinks and fetishes, or should I continue to work with the cute boys in supporting roles? I have a year or so to decide, so I'll just enjoy this time as the adorable boy star!

Since the peak of my career in child pornography is passing, I've been writing down these memoirs of how I got to be where I am today. It's been an amazing ride, and if you are considering whether to give your kid permission to enter this line of work, you should read these memoirs. It's not what you might think. The business is full of really good people, and the kids always come first. They take very good care of us, and we produce top quality products. The money is fantastic, and in one year, even in one month, if you're as lucky as I was, a kid can pay for an entire four-year college education with income from child porn, but I'm not writing this to promote the industry. I'm just writing my own story.

This is part 2 of my memoirs. In part 1, I covered the events that led to my introduction to child porn production. I described my discovery, both being discovered as a new talent and my own discovery of this wonderful world that was so full of love and self-determination. I began working in the studio one morning as a fluff boy, and by the afternoon, I was performing my first scene in front of the camera, or cameras, all eight of them. The studio owners and the executive producer liked what they saw, and they offered me a very favorable contract. All of that occurred within a single 24-hour period.

I've been through many phases and explored a lot of sexual variety in my time, and in part 2, I explore gender as much as anything.

When I first got started in the business of making child porn, I wanted to try everything. Things were happening very fast, but sometimes I was impatient and wanted them to happen even faster. For example, I didn't want to wait for the mandatory physical exams to do certain scenes., I saw so many things, so many different types of people, including an unusual number of trannies and femboys. I later learned there wasn't an unusual number of them, but I had never been around them, and I was drawn to them. I wondered what it would be like to be a little girly. Well, I became a lot girly for a while, but mostly when I was with Sebastian. He brought out the femboy in me because he showed me the fun in it. I explored what it felt like to dress in girly clothes, and what I found was a sense of freedom, the freedom not to be afraid of trying new things and to take risks to discover myself. I'm not a tranny, and I'm not a proper femboy either, though I was sure taken by one, a boy named Annie. I'm a gay boy who isn't afraid to have a little fun with girls on occasion, and I also like to play dress-up when I'm in the mood.

Part 2 deals a lot with girls and boys. What makes a boy a boy, and what do girls really have up their pussies? My first experience with a girl's pussy, done on-camera for a generous pay bonus, helped me learn, though it was a bit embarrassing. The girl, Claire, was lovely, and she had a wonderful sense of humor once I got to know her better. I accidentally did something right in that scene, though, and I think it took her out of action for a day or two. She says it was a whole week, but I know we shot a scene very soon after.

I also had to face that my mum's flat didn't have enough security for a boy who was soon to become a wealthy celebrity with many expensive possessions. Randy also told me bluntly what he thought of Mum as a parent. I had a difficult decision to make.

Part 2 picks up as Randy, my new agent, and a pair of lawyers come to my flat to get Mum's signature on my contract. There is just a tiny bit of overlap with the end of Part One., My new friends Boris and Sebastian, a pair of Russian actors, have come along with Randy to visit while Mum signs the deal.

I hope you enjoy it!

Chapter 10
Victory Drive

8:00 PM, Monday, July 16

Randy had us re-stage this "Victory Drive" shot for my promo material. Frenetic had paid for permits to shoot a scene for a film on the Albert Bridge, and we took advantage of the empty bridge to take this shot. We borrowed a couple of actors from that scene to stand in as spectators. That's Joseph "Uncle Jack" Purvis with Ross from the Children's division. They nearly always work together.

***

"Mrs. Hawkinson, how lovely to see you again," said Randy as he entered the flat where I lived with my mum and my older brother Ian. After my first day of filming at Frenetic Studios, he had come home with me in a limousine, the UK's largest porn studio. He was there to talk to Mum about signing a contract for me to work as an actor for Frenetic in their Children's Division. This would be a tricky business, but my new agent, Randy Christianson, was clever and crafty.

What made it so tricky was my age and the nature of the work. I was only eight at the time, almost nine, and Mum thought anything having to do with sex was disgusting; I only recently learned why that was. If I went to her one day and asked for permission to be in child porn movies, she would have cringed and said, "No!" That would be the end of it. Maybe if I had been a bit cleverer, I could have asked, "Mum, I don't have to be in those awful child porn movies, do I?"

That's the way things are in our house. Only Mum has correct opinions and ideas, not dumb little Trevor, my older brother's little brother. It wouldn't matter how successful I might be. She couldn't stand the idea of me being more successful than my brother Ian; it wouldn't matter that thousands of child porn actors had worked for Frenetic over the past several decades, and many have gone on to be successful stars of stage and screen. At least twenty of them are BAFTA recipients, and no less than seventy have won Willies, though the Willy Awards have only been in existence for ten years. Others have had successful careers in business, law, politics, and other performing arts.

All kids who work for Frenetic are well educated by the studio, which is the only one of its kind to be appropriately licensed as a primary and secondary school. The studio hires the finest tutors available and are well paid. We receive a lot of one-on-one time with these tutors, and we learn much faster with this individual attention than students in regular schools, even in the elite fee-paying schools. This kind of education seems to be working very well. For example, I'm twelve, but my tutor Marie says I'm learning at the level of someone who is sixteen in all of my subjects, higher in some, which is the tenth grade in the US, where I now live. This is not boasting. My academic marks are completely average for Frenetic America kids my age.

The Public Relations office at Frenetic America has been helpful to me as I write these memoirs, and they provided me with some interesting figures concerning education. As of the end of last year, out of the 1,632 actors who have worked for Frenetic's Children's Division, and who are now age 30 or older, all had finished secondary school with a GCSE good pass mark in at least two subjects. Most finished while at Frenetic, more than 1,200 hold bachelor's degrees, or bachelor equivalents, 431 of who went on to earn master's degrees, and 87 of whom have earned doctoral degrees. This more than doubles the national averages in the UK and the US., One has been a cabinet minister, and three have been MPs. Three others have won Olympic medals, two silver and one bronze, still waiting for gold. Either the Frenetic education system is excellent or the studio only hires intelligent and highly capable actors. After four years of working for Frenetic and Frenetic America, I think both are true.

Sure, some child actors have had problems after leaving Frenetic, but that's nothing compared to the problems they have with former child stars in Hollywood. Frenetic child alums have fewer problems than most non-actors after entering adulthood because they take such good care of us kids. We have lower rates of criminal arrests and convictions, lower rates of acquired psychiatric disorders, and lower rates of traffic accidents and traffic violations as we grow older. In fact, as a class, we qualify for lower premiums for automobile liability insurance. We score higher in career satisfaction measures,regardless of career, optimism, and quality of life.

None of that would matter to Mum. It wouldn't matter to her that they keep a staff of health professionals onsite at Frenetic and Frenetic America, including a nurse on each set, in both the Children and Adult Divisions, and a house physician during all filming hours. They even have two psychologists, one of whom is a pediatric psychologist, whom actors in the Children's Division are required to see for one hour every month, more if the actor, the actor's tutor, the psychologist, or an actor's parent, guardian, or attorney requests it.

Most kids are only allowed to do what we call 'extreme bottoming' once per week, and they are required to see the pediatric colon and rectum specialist once per month. Sebastian loves those exams. He has an odd condition called IAH that allows him to do more extreme bottoming than most other kids. He's not the only one either., All of us who are likely to bottom at all, which includes a lot of the girls who want their cherries to remain intact, are taught pelvic floor and sphincter training exercises. We are expected to practice them on our own, though there is a wonderful group offered for doing those exercises together.

The most fun part for me is when we pick up objects of different shapes in our ass, walk across the room, and set the object down in a specific place. The long, slender, weighted, and highly lubricated 'plugs', as we call them, are the most difficult. We all have a good laugh when someone drops one. Some of them now have electronics that produce different programmable sounds when they are dropped, and we never know what the instructor has programmed.

There are contests too, with us kids playing in rounds. For each round, more weight is added to the plug, which is always the thinnest one. The battle is really for second place because Sebastian nearly always wins. That's why the specialists and everybody else give him a lot more freedom with what might or might not be classified as extreme bottoming. I think that boy could take a twenty man anal gang bang and then lift a ten-kilo weight hanging from a plastic chopstick shoved up his ass while it's still slippery from all the cum.

They also have an extensive physical fitness program for us kids, though it's nothing like what the adults have to do. Obviously, we need to keep fit and look well-toned for our work. Some of the films I've done also require gymnastics skills and a great deal of flexibility.

Full-time child actors, many of whom live in dormitories or apartments in the studio complex, normally begin their days during the school year with one hour of physical activity and fitness training. We can choose from various activities, including football, judo, weight training, mandatory when boys turn twelve. Gymnastics, rugby, cross country running, swimming in a proper Olympic pool, many aerobic dance styles, volleyball, tennis, and I'm sure many other sports that I can't remember. A dietitian staff provides breakfast and lunch, which are tailored to our specific nutritional needs and tastes, though they allow us some decadence for tea. Actors in residence and those who work the evening shift also get a full supper.

Despite all of these great programs for improving our health and education, Mum is only concerned with what she said. Once she says it, it can never be changed. Therefore porn is disgusting, and I would not be allowed in the business. She has exactly one opinion on every subject, and no one can change her mind, except her blue-eyed blonde wonder-boy Ian, and then only when he becomes naughty, or "mischievous" as Mum calls it. He can just smile and giggle, and she will let him get away with anything, especially if it involves picking on his little brother. But I digress.

***

Until the previous day, I had never heard of child pornography, but after I met Randy in a park, while I was in a somewhat compromising position up high in a tree, he introduced me to some lovely new friends and told me about the business. It was the most important day of my life because it was the moment I broke free from ignorance, naiveté, and Mum's oppressive attitudes toward sex, and it was the day when I seized control of my own life.

Earlier that day, I had gone with Randy to Frenetic Studios with my two new friends, and child porn actors from Russia, Boris, and Sebastian, to see if I would enjoy working in the business. I spent the day on the set working as a fluff service provider, or FSP, for Sebastian in the morning, and Boris in the afternoon. FSP's have the task of doing whatever is necessary to keep their actor erect., However, as I returned to the set after lunch, Randy told me I was urgently needed on another set, not as an FSP, but as an actor!

Everything moved so fast, and everyone kept telling me that I was special, a natural, and someone who would go far in the business. Suffice it to say that the executive producer and the owners and investors were so pleased with me that they made me an unusually generous one-year contract offer. Already I had been paid £1,200 in cash for my work today, £300 as an FSP and £900 for acting the scene on-camera.

The scene was actually my on-camera audition for Frenetic Studios, but it was a mere formality from what I could tell. Actors in the Children's Division get paid thousands for each scene, but the first on-camera scene is always considered an audition. The actor is paid £900 in cash at the end of the day.

After the audition, there can be no more acting work until a contract is in place between the studio and the actor's parent or guardian. In fact, the film with the audition scene cannot be released without the signed contract, so the studio had taken a big risk having me work in that scene. That contract was what Randy was discussing with Mum right now.

I was a little nervous, having so much cash all at once. I had never seen £1,200 in one place before. I kept £200 in cash at Randy's suggestion, and Randy put the rest into the safe in the limo until he got home. He would keep it in a safe in his home until my solicitor Markus, and I opened up two bank accounts – one for my college fund and one for my spending money, both of which would be in his name, with me as an authorized card user. It sounds complicated, but it's just one way I could hide all my money from Mum and Ian. My monthly thousand quid would go directly to Markus, who would then deposit it into my college fund account. Then he would get another 500 quid of trust fund money each month from Randy to deposit into my spending money account. That was the original plan on paper anyway. The actual amount of spending money was considerably higher. Mum wouldn't know about the second account, and she couldn't touch either account anyway. She could hardly complain about the college fund account, as it was her idea.

***

Boris and Sebastian had come along to my flat too because Randy and I had told Mum about them the day before. This way, she would know I wasn't making up stories. Boris always dressed in black, and this evening he was wearing a very sexy pair of black satin running shorts with red stripes, a plain black t-shirt, and of course, black shoes and socks. Sebastian was also wearing sexy satin running shorts, but his were bright yellow with blue stripes. He also wore a yellow t-shirt that was covered with bright blue and green triangles. He somehow found a pair of bright yellow shoes with flashing lights in the soles, and just because he's Sebastian, he was wearing Sponge Bob Squarepants socks that matched the Y-fronts I was wearing.

These two could wear whatever they wanted. They were very wealthy. Everything they wore was a deliberate choice. I didn't know how to choose good clothes, and honestly, I preferred to be naked when I was around them. Sebastian was usually naked too whenever it was possible, which was most of the time. Boris, however, was the Boy in Black. He had to be wearing at least something black all the time unless he was having sex, which was quite often. When a boy lives with Sebastian, he tends to have sex almost constantly.

It was hard for us boys to sit still at the kitchen table while Mum and Randy were talking over their tea, but every now and then, one of the boys would say something like, "Oh yes, Howkinson Mississ, very nice place for boy to work. Have teacher and nurse on set, is very good. Teacher make behave, shout much."

After about ten minutes, Randy brought the subject around to the studio and the film industry. He didn't say much of substance, mostly about Mr. Eastman and his enthusiastic ideas for film roles for me. When Mum seemed to become the slightest bit interested, after Randy mentioned her own monthly stipend in the contract, Randy made a call on his cell phone, asking if the solicitors could meet us in fifteen or twenty minutes with my contract. He smiled and said, "thanks, that's even better," as he hung up the call.

"Mrs. Hawkinson, we're in luck," he said. "They are very close by, and we can expect them soon, in about five minutes."

The three of us boys tried not to look at each other for fear of giggling. We all knew the solicitors were just outside in the limo.

The doorbell rang exactly five minutes later, and I went to the door to let them in. "Mum," I said, "this is Mr. Kramer and Mr. White. They're the solicitors."

Randy had coached me to address them as mister instead of using their first names. He thought it would go better if she didn't think they were already on a first-name basis with me. Besides, Mr. White hates his first name, Virgil, so we all just call him Mr. White.

"Stand up, boys, and let the grown-ups sit on the chairs!"

Mum was so old fashioned, and not in any way was that good. I didn't like her barking at my new friends like that, but everything had to go smoothly tonight, so I bit my lip and said nothing as the three of us stood together at the table.

The solicitors did their best to confuse Mum with the details in the contract and distract her from anything important. Assigning Randy, for one, as my trustee and legal guardian and giving Markus my power of attorney. It allowed him to intercept my monthly pay allowance before Mum could get at it, and Mum pretended to understand everything, nodding knowingly.

Boris, Sebastian, and I were secretly playing with each other's asses while we stood at the table. We pinched each other and poked each other, trying to make each other giggle, cough, or get a boner. Their thin satin running shorts made their butts feel so nice. I could feel their springy, round, lovely ass cheeks right through them.

I thought of Annie's ass cheeks and how impossible it was that they belonged to a mere human. Annie was a boy who loved being pretty, so he dressed as a girl. He was a friend of Boris and Sebastian. He was so pretty he made me dizzy. Neither of the boys decided to wear undies before leaving the studio so that I could feel everything through their satin shorts. I lost our little game when I had to bend over to hide my boner. The three of us decided it would be best if we went to the bedroom. Ian was at a Boy Scouts meeting, so we would have some privacy. As we walked away behind Mum, I pulled the front of my shorts down to show Randy and the solicitors my boner. They all coughed and cleared their throats. I giggled and ran ahead of Boris and Sebastian to the room I shared with Ian. I quickly pulled off my shorts and underpants and rummaged through my drawer until I found my own little track shorts. They were not thin satin, but at least we sort of matched.

The contract was over 30 pages long, in very small print, with many items repeated numerous times to wear out someone like my mum. In the end, she signed just to make them go away. The solicitors bade Mum goodnight and went out to the limo to wait. Randy called the three of us to come back out to the kitchen. Mum had gone to the sitting room to pour herself a large gin and tonic without offering Randy one.

"Congratulations, Trevor," he said, shaking my hand, "you're a star!"

I could see Mum in the sitting room with an empty glass, counting a stack of money. "We decided to give your mum her first monthly payment today, just to move things along," Randy said in a hushed voice.

"Trevor, if you'd like, you'll be spending the night with us again. I've cleared it with your mum. We have a lot to celebrate!"

8:45 PM, Monday, July 16

I decided that night that a stretch limousine was the best way to see London. As we pulled away from the flat, we all cheered, and there was a frenzy of kissing until each of us had collected at least five kisses, one from everybody. The three of us boys sat together on the seat facing the rear, and the three men sat in the rear, facing forward. Markus sat across from me, Mr. White sat across from Sebastian, to my left, and Randy sat on the far side, across from Boris.

Markus had a smile on his face that he couldn't seem to control. He made me giggle, which made him giggle with embarrassment. "Trevor," he said, trying to shake the redness from his face, "you are going to make all of us so bloody rich!" It seems the people in the porn business really liked to clap and cheer because they did it a lot, and they were doing it again.

Randy opened what I thought was a table, in between the two seats, and withdrew a champagne bottle. "Who feels like celebrating?" he asked. I smiled, not sure what to say. Markus opened a small compartment holding a cooler and handed a glass to each of us. Randy popped the cork, which was much louder than I'd expected, and filled my glass first.

"The new film star first," he said as he poured. The bubbles made it overflow on Sebastian's lap, so Boris leaned over and started lapping it up.

"Boys first!" Mr. White called out.

When Randy finished filling everybody's glasses, he added a little more to mine. "I want you to raise your glasses, gentlemen," he said. "Child porn has seen a lot of stars come and go. We have seen our fads and our trends. The whole industry has seen its ups and downs, but it has never seen anything like Frenetic's new star, Trevor Hawkinson. To the fabulous success that is sure to follow, Trevor Hawkinson!"

"Trevor!" everyone shouted, with the Russians adding "Boy" to my name, as they always did.

Glasses clinked, and I had my first taste of an alcoholic drink. It tasted fruity, but it wasn't very sweet. It was also far too bubbly and hard to swallow without belching. The grown-ups sure liked it, though.

Sebastian and Boris seemed to like it too. They started to get giggly. I felt warm and happy, truly relaxed for the first time since… maybe the first time ever. The contract was signed, everybody loved me, I had very little to do except living in a heaven of sex with beautiful boys, and I was going to make almost a quarter-million quid or more, most likely a lot more, in very little time. I began to smile now like Markus had been doing earlier. I smiled, and I couldn't stop, though I didn't try very hard. I looked at Sebastian and kissed him deeply. When we ended our kiss, we both started laughing, There wasn't anything funny, but life had suddenly turned so wonderful that nothing mattered.

We drove around parks and hillsides, along the Thames, through the countryside, talking about the good things to come. I had finished my glass of champagne in just a few minutes, and Randy poured one more for me. He said I had to wait an hour before he would let me have any more. I found the more I drank, the more I liked it. "Oh, be careful, Trevor Boy," said Sebastian. "I sit here on your next and no want your puking on me!"

"Puking?" I asked. "Will champagne make me sick? I've never had it."

"You should drink it slowly then," said Markus. "Find out if your stomach can handle it. Some people can only have a little."

"Nothing can make me feel bad today!" I kissed Sebastian again.

"Mr. Markus," said Sebastian, "I no never suck your cock before, no?

"No," said Markus. "I think I would have remembered!"

"Come Trevor Boy," said Sebastian as he scooted up onto my lap. "Sit for middle seat so I suck Mr. Markus please."

At that moment, I thought Sebastian was the sweetest boy in the world. His ass was soft on my lap, the skin on his thighs was luxurious, and he couldn't wait to give Markus a treat. Then his knee hit my glass and spilled half of my champagne. He turned to me and said, "Oh Trevor Boy! So sorry for spill champagne! Randy Man, more champagne for Trevor Boy. I spill for his glass."

I worked my way to the middle seat, but I hooked my right leg around Sebastian's left leg. "You spilled my champagne; I keep your leg!" He smiled sweetly and kissed me as Randy topped off my glass.

"I mean it," said Randy, "drink this one slowly."

I stroked Sebastian's thigh as I sipped my champagne. Sebastian turned to Markus and winked, then kissed him. Sebastian reached down to the man's crotch and began to rub his cock through his trousers. The rest of us began to cheer him on.

"Sebastian is a real professional, Markus," said Randy. "Don't say I didn't warn you!"

I untangled my leg from Sebastian's as he got to his knees on the floor of the limo. I slid over to Boris, snuggled into his chest, and pulled his arm around me as we watched the action.Sebastian threw the solicitor's tie back around his neck, then slid down to unfasten his belt. He released the button on Markus' trousers, then took the zipper in his teeth and pulled the fly open.

"Whoa! Nice move!" I said.

I wrapped my left arm around Boris' thigh and had another sip of champagne. Everything felt so good! If there is something that is the opposite of a headache, that's what I had. It was a feel-good head.

Markus was wearing boxer shorts. Sebastian gently teased the front slot open, only a bit, and ran his tongue up and down on the flesh inside. Markus moaned in pleasure at this. Soon his hard cock popped up through the slot. "I do that, call it toaster, for pop up from slot," said Sebastian as he teased Markus with kisses and a few short, soft licks until he was fully hard.

"Think you like for me suck this cock, no?"

"Yes, please," said the moaning man.

"My fee for do you this is two southand pounds please," he said, sitting up, looking the man in the eye. Markus stared at him, as perplexed as anyone I've seen. Sebastian had worked him into such a state, but was it all for money? Was that what porn boys did to earn extra cash from the businessmen in the industry? Sebastian gazed into the man's eyes, sternly, not moving. The man crushed his eyebrows together and whimpered, putting his hand down into his trouser pocket.

As soon as his hand touched his pocket, Sebastian suddenly threw his head down and sucked the man's cock into his mouth as deep as it would go. He sucked the man aggressively while Markus flexed his head back and his whole body stiffened.

Randy laughed out loud and said, "I warned you, Markus! This one knows all the tricks!" Markus was moaning too hard to reply.

"What you think, Trevor Boy," asked Boris, "him cum quick or cum slow?"

"Dunno," I said. I knew Sebastian was amazing with his mouth, and I know I'd cum right away. I stroked the bottom of Boris' smooth thigh and pondered the matter.

Sebastian stopped for a moment and said, "He not cum till Sebastian say he cum!"

The other two men were watching the action intently. I had wondered about this limo ride. Were we going to have another sex party? It seemed all we did was sex and kissing. That was far better than what I would be doing at home, that's for sure. It was 9:30, and I'd have been sent to bed, an hour before Precious Ian. That wasn't all bad, though. It gave me private time to wank all I wanted. I guess whether I was here or at home, I would be having some kind of sex. I decided I would play hard-to-get, though. If someone wanted my sexy body, they would have to beg first!

Then I saw something that truly surprised me, just when I thought there was nothing left to surprise me. I saw Randy's hand reach over and stroke Mr. White's upper thigh, then down over his crotch! Why did that surprise me? Maybe it was because, for the last day and a half, I had seen nothing but adults having sex with kids and kids having sex with other kids. It was all about us kids. So Randy and Mr. White were gay. So? I felt a little disappointed at not being the focus of everyone's attention. I laid my head down on Boris' bare thigh and thought about how silly I was being. I couldn't play hard-to-get if they didn't want to get me! Boris stroked my hair. I imagined he knew what I was thinking.

Then I got an idea. I sat up, kissed Boris, and took a swallow of my champagne. This was my party, and I was king. It was time for me to act like a king! "Randy, take off his belt!" It was a command, not a suggestion. Randy grinned at me, then obeyed.

"Markus! Take that shirt off! Undershirt as well!" He obeyed too. "Randy! Unbutton and unzip those trousers. Pull them down now! I don't want to wait!" It was just like being a dom with Adrian and Robbie back at the studio. I had another gulp. I didn't know if they had been waiting for me to do this or if they were just humoring me, but at the time, I knew they were obeying me, so I continued.

"Sebastian! You can go deeper than that!" I had seen Sebastian taking all of Pao Pao's eight-inch cock into his throat earlier in the day while he was shooting his morning scene. Markus' cock was big, but not that big. Sebastian inhaled deeply and obeyed. He shoved the cock into his throat as deep as it would go. Then he pressed harder until his knees lifted off the limo floor. Suddenly something gave way, and the whole cock slid right in, balls deep.

"Wow, so sexy for Sebastian doing that," said Boris.

"I know," I said with confidence as I continued to caress the bottom of his thigh. "Randy! Suck that cock! It's not gonna suck itself!" Randy nodded and began to suck Mr. White's big cock with enthusiasm. "Sebastian! He cums when you decide he cums, but you will make him cum by deep throating him." The boy nodded as the man grunted and gasped.

I thought it was unusual that all three men had such big cocks. So did Boris. People had told me that mine was big, or at least that it was long. Only Sebastian had a normal boy-sized cock.

I could feel Boris' hard cock through his skimpy satin running shorts, and he was starting to breathe faster. "No, Boris," I said. "You stay where you are. It seems you are mine tonight."

He sighed and giggled, "Yes, Trevor Boy." I had the impression he was playing along, but not taking my role as dom seriously.

"He doesn't look as hard as he could be, Randy," I called. "You only have one cock to take care of. Take care of it!" He bobbed his head up and down faster, and Mr. White gasped. "White! Do you like boys?"

There was a look of something like fear in his eyes. He nodded his head and said, "Yes, I do. I love boys, especially boys like you."

"Keep dreaming, White," I said, taking another drink. "This is one boy ass you'll have to earn, and you have quite a ways to go before that happens."

I pulled the waistband of my shorts down over my hip to tease him, and he came right away in Randy's mouth. Randy wasn't expecting it, so he coughed and let it all spill out of his mouth, making a mess on Mr. White's crotch. "Lick it up, Randy!" I yelled. I squeezed Boris' thigh with excitement as Randy licked and cleaned the cum mess from Mr. White. "Clean his cock carefully!" Randy obeyed.

Randy lifted his head when the job was complete, and Mr. White flopped back on the seat, completely spent. "Feeling a little worn out, White? I should set Sebastian on you next. You'll see what it means to be worn out!" Randy smiled at me and raised his glass to me before having a drink.

"Look at Sebastian!" Randy exclaimed. Markus turned to him with a look of desperation. "He's been edging Markus for at least five minutes, all deep throat!"

"Little buddy Sebastian very good, never tired. He know how you feel, make adjust. Very exact," said Boris.

"I think it's time for you to let him shoot Sebastian," I said.

He nodded slightly and held his face firmly to the man's body, the big man-cock fully in the boy's throat. Sebastian made shallow, rapid movements until the man let out a roar of pleasure, his body in spasms. Sebastian stayed where he was, no longer moving, but not releasing the man's cock. It seemed Markus' cum shot straight into Sebastian's stomach. Sebastian closed his eyes, pulled back a bit, and began to breathe deeply through his nose, still not letting go of the man's cock. He turned his head to the side and rested it on the man's left hip, still keeping his cock deep inside his mouth.

"He sleep some time like this, with big cock in mouth. Very sweet," said Boris.

I drank down the last of my champagne and said, "Naked, Randy. Now!" Randy looked surprised but obeyed. "I want to see wood, Randy! Hardwood!" He took hold of his lovely big cock and began stroking it. He was hard in just a few seconds. He knew I had plans for him, and he was also a professional.

"Sebastian," I cooed, "my sweet Sebastian; wake up!"

He looked at me as if to plead to let him stay where he was so comfortable with his favorite binky, a man's cock in his mouth. He gave it a few more sucks.

"Up Sebastian. Naked. Now. Markus, help him!"

Sebastian pulled his head up slowly, savoring the full length of the soft cock as it slowly slid its way out of his mouth and flopped down on the man's body. Markus reached down to Sebastian's waist and pulled his shirt up and off. Sebastian pulled his shorts to his knees, then sat back on the seat while Markus pulled them the rest of the way off, and then the boy's socks and shoes.

"All fours, Sebastian, with your ass facing Markus." He obeyed. "Markus, lick his ass. Get it lubed. Good. Now put two fingers inside. Do it now! Don't wait! He will take it!" Sebastian grunted softly as the man's fingers pried his sphincter open, which we all knew was not difficult.

"Give him a good massage," I said.

Markus began rubbing Sebastian's little, underdeveloped prostate, and the boy moaned. I glanced back at Randy to make sure he was hard, and then I said, "Fingers out! Sebastian! On your belly! On the table! Open wide for Randy!" Man and boy obeyed, and soon Sebastian was spread-eagle on the table that was really a cooler full of champagne. "On your knees, Randy, and let him have it!"

Randy knew what a sexual animal Sebastian was, so he obeyed without hesitating. He slid his butt-hammer into little Sebastian's not-so-little hole and fucked at full speed. The boy squealed, the man moaned, and the other men looked on gratefully.

Boris began gyrating his hips to rub his cock against me. "Boris, no!" I yelled.

I dug my fingers into the back of his thigh, then resumed caressing it. How could strong muscles feel so soft when they are relaxed? Men aren't like that, only boys. And Boris was a strong boy. You can't have sex all day with someone and not have any idea how strong they are. My thighs were soft but in a soft and squishy, little boy way. I didn't think there were any muscles in my thighs at all. I wondered if that would change as I grew up. I hoped one day I would have thighs like Boris.

Randy grunted louder and louder while Sebastian squeaked and squealed. Soon Randy came, and I ordered Sebastian to clean off Randy's cock with his mouth. He obeyed, of course. I was calm, and I was still in command. I was pretty sure everyone was playing along because it was fun, and because it was my party, but I didn't care. It might have been the champagne. Two glasses is a lot for a boy of eight, almost nine.

I pulled Sebastian next to me so all three of us boys were cuddling in a row. There was only one way to end this drive. I kissed Sebastian deeply, then extended my legs over the table in Mr. White's direction.

"White! Shoes and socks off! Now!"

He removed my shoes and socks, looking somewhat afraid that I was going to order him to endure more pleasure.

"Sebastian," I said softly, "pull my shorts and undies down to my knees." I arched my back, lifting my ass off the seat, and he obeyed. "Now, my shirt." I pulled him next to me again. "Randy!" I said harshly. Shorts and undies off! Now!" I was naked, snuggling between my two favorite boys in the world, but there was unfinished business.

I turned slightly to my left and smiled at Boris as I rubbed his cock through his shorts. I turned to my right and kissed Sebastian and nudged him off of me. I rose from my seat and lay supine on the table. "Sebastian, feed me. Boris, in my ass. Let's put on a show for these good gentlemen!"

Boris stripped immediately and licked out my ass, leaving it sloppy and wet. He slowly inserted a finger, then moved it around to loosen me up. "None of that," I said. "Just stick it in!"

I felt a little reckless and impatient. Was it the champagne again? The thick, smooth cock felt as wonderful as ever as he slid it into my hole. I let out a soft cooing sound as my ass erupted with sensation. I grabbed Sebastian's ass to pull his cock into my mouth. His cock was about the same size as mine, but not as long. It wasn't difficult to fit it all in my mouth, and I could do a lot more with my tongue than I could when I was sucking Boris or other boys at the studio who had bigger cocks.

Sebastian tried to lean over and suck my cock at the same time, but I wouldn't let him. I had a plan. Sebastian had such a cute ass! It was round and perky. It seemed to project out more than other boys' butts. Nearly every part of the body can make me cum if I focus on it, and there were many times when it was Sebastian's ass that got me there.

I draped my legs over Boris' shoulders as he pulled me by the hips. I brought my legs together to feel his face, and at the same time, I brought Sebastian's legs together on my face.

I jumped suddenly as I felt something icy splashing on my belly. With Sebastian's thighs over my ears, it was hard to hear what was going on. I pushed Sebastian back to hear everyone laughing, men and boys, as the three men each poured a full glass of champagne over my naked body. Randy leaned forward, filling another glass, and very carefully tipped a small amount of it into my mouth. The boys were each having another drink as well.

I wrapped my legs around Boris' waist and pulled him back in. Then I pulled Sebastian into my face again and sucked as I meant it. Another minute went by, and several things happened rather suddenly. Boris came in my ass, and he seemed to cum hard. Sebastian had a boygasm too, and he was trying to pull away from me. I held him in place, though, and kept sucking him through his dry orgasm. Then I felt more cold champagne flowing down Sebastian's thighs and onto my face and shoulders, and more flowing down Boris' body onto my thighs, with some splashing onto my boner.

When Boris slowly pulled his soft cock from my ass, I let Sebastian go. I sat up, and Randy handed me a full glass of champagne. I gulped half of it down. I liked the way I was feeling! I was in control, I was not scared, and nothing could stop me! I turned around to face the other side of the table.

"Markus! Suck my COCK!" I shouted.

He looked me in the eye, curiously. I returned the gaze sternly. He got to his knees on the limo floor and took my cock into his mouth.

The others cheered, and I smiled as I was given an incredible blowjob. Markus worked for me now. He was in his place. I was the one everybody wanted, and if he wanted a piece of the action, he was going to be my bitch.

Well, that's not what I was thinking that night, but today I think that's what the blowjob from my lawyer might have meant to me. Or maybe I'm reading too much into it, and he just gave me a damn fine blowjob while I was buzzed on alcohol for the first time in my life.

Markus sucked with power and urgency. The others again poured champagne all over me, from head to foot. My hair was soaked. Then I felt four small, soft hands on my right chest and thigh, and four larger, less soft hands on my left chest and thigh, smearing the champagne over my whole body, adding more where it was needed. I belonged to everybody. I could feel the world longing for me.

I had a powerful orgasm, but it wasn't as harsh as they usually were. It was simply thrilling. I held Markus' head down to let him know I wanted him to continue. I let out a sound that felt like a great sigh of joy and a cry combined. I felt tears in my eyes, then running down my temples. I held Markus' head still, and I realized I was crying. I had no idea why. I wasn't sad. I was the happiest I'd ever been. It was my first experience with tears of joy.

I sat up and hugged and kissed everyone in the limo, telling them I loved them all. I think it disturbed some of them that I was crying, and I mean really crying, but Randy understood, and I think Sebastian did too. They knew how overjoyed I was, and that the alcohol was making me feel like letting it out. They both smiled, and Sebastian poured a little more champagne over my head.

"Looks more cuter with wet head and droppings on face," he said.

Mr. White looked almost frightened as this crying naked boy, soaking wet with expensive champagne, wrapped him in a hug, so after I kissed him, I smiled and licked his nose to show him I was happy.

At one point, we opened the privacy screen so I could crawl naked into the front seat and hug and kiss the driver the next time we stopped.

"Blimey, you're a pretty one, ain't ya!" he said. "Are you new at the studio?"

"Yes," I replied. "We're celebrating my first contract tonight."

He patted my bare ass as I climbed back into the rear of the limo, saying, "mark my words boy, with that face and this ass, you'll go places!" Maybe I would get tired of hearing that at some point, but not today.

Before closing the privacy screen, Randy called to the driver, "Take us through Piccadilly Circus, Trafalgar Square, past Buck Palace, and then past Harrods."

"Right Sir," said the driver.

Something was going on that I didn't know. Randy nodded to each of the Russian boys, and they both wore devilish grins. As we passed through each of the popular tourist areas, the electric sunroof opened, and Boris and Sebastian wrestled me up through the opening. I was sitting on their shoulders, and they tried to push me high enough so people could see my willy! It was a warm summer evening in London, but it was still cold to a boy who was dripping in chilled champagne. As we passed Nelson's Column, one of the boys shoved his finger up my ass, and I squealed to the whole square! I guess I needed to become accustomed to people looking at me while I was naked.

As we drove past Buckingham Palace, Boris held me up by himself while Sebastian sucked my cock, which of course, was all shriveled from the cold wind. All three of us sat on top of the car, with our legs hanging down through the sunroof, as we passed Harrods. Traffic was moving slowly, and one man threw each of us a string of beads.

***

Our drive ended as we entered the private grounds of an opulent mansion in Chelsea. I had never thought to ask where we were going. It seemed we were just driving. We were soaked, our clothes were soaked, and I had no idea where we were.

"Well, never mind that," said Randy with a smile. "I think you've been voted the most beautiful boy in the world, so you don't need to cover up."

Boris and Sebastian thought this was funny, and I didn't care anymore. I swigged the last of my champagne, and the other boys dumped what remained in their glasses over my head.

"Baptize this boy Trevor Boy Hawkniss… Hawknsiss… Trevor Hawk…Boy!" said Boris.

Everybody cheered again. That was the beginning of my stage name, Trevor Hawk, and the different versions of it, accidentally uttered by a Russian boy who couldn't pronounce my last name.

"Don't worry about your wet things," Randy said as I was wringing out my shirt. "Just leave them in the car. They will be taken care of." I guess that was ok for us boys, but the men all put their wet clothes back on and tried to look presentable.

I looked around the completely unfamiliar grounds and asked, "Where are we? Who's the lord of this manor?"

"Is not worry, Trevor Boy. Is only party with tuxedo and fur coat," said Boris with a cheeky grin. "I tell you, is not for worry." He knew he was making me nervous, and I knew it was just a wind-up. "Trevor Boy being naked is like ugly guy being with tuxedo," he continued. "Both make more good looking." He could be so sweet! I looked at Randy, and he looked at a very nervous Mr. White, who was trying to wipe the cum from the front of his trousers.

I could hear live piano music coming from inside, so I danced up to the front door. Sebastian joined me, and we danced together until the others were ready to enter. I had learned over the past two days that if Boris and Sebastian were not worried, then I shouldn't worry either.

Chapter 11
A Formal Occasion

9:30 PM, Monday, July 16

Mr. Eastman loved his living statue art. Here are just two of the many displays I saw that night. Those people had to remain motionless for twenty minutes at a time, including all their facial expressions. While at my signing party at Cockerel Manor, I saw myself in the huge, gold-tinted mirror wall, and I looked good. I looked beautiful. Was that really me? It hurt again to see such a beautiful boy, even though it was me this time. Why did that keep happening?

***

Mr. White rang the door chime. A stern, thin, balding man who looked older than the American president, and who was dressed in a long tuxedo and white gloves answered. He looked over our group. He seemed to smile at us boys, but he looked with a hint of disdain at the men.

"Enter please," he said. "Sir is expecting you in the statuary room. This way please."

We followed him over marble floors, past antique bronze statues, and beneath ornately painted ceilings, pausing at the entrance to a large room that I couldn't quite see from where I was standing. The place looked like a royal residence. Were we about to meet the queen?

Turning to me, the man said, "Welcome to Cockerel Manor, and may one offer one's humble congratulations to you on the occasion of your first contract signing, Master Trevor." He bowed and followed us into the room.

"Thank you Benton," I heard Randy say.

Sebastian was pulling me by the arm around an open door into a very large and luxurious room. We passed a serving-man who was holding a tray of champagne glasses. We each took one, of course. There were sofas and cushioned chairs arranged all around the room. There was a large, black grand piano in the back corner with a woman playing it, and a fireplace in the middle of the back wall. Oil paintings of all sorts, battle scenes, landscapes, portraits, nudes, people having sex, and even stupid bowls of fruit hung from the walls.

A gold-tinted mirror with decorative arch patterns covered the entire right wall. As we entered, I saw our reflections in the mirror, and I thought for the first time, "Wow, I really am cute!" I could see my whole naked body and lots of other people too because the mirror was so huge. I saw my shape for the first time as I had seen the shapes of other boys like Sebastian. I saw my messy wet hair as something that looked cute on a boy who was having fun. The curve of my ass cheeks, the shape of my legs, the shape of my torso, not round, but not too flat and skinny, my big brown eyes, and my cute smile really did look fantastic!

My cock seemed the perfect size for a little boy, a term I was growing accustomed to now that I knew what it meant at Frenetic–not too big, not too small, and even though it was shriveled from the cold, it stood out in front of me, demanding attention. I wondered what it would be like to fuck myself. I really did have a great ass! Why was I the only one in the whole world who could never know what it was like to fuck that great ass? I remembered a TV program where someone who loved himself too much complained because he had to have a platonic relationship with his reflection. I didn't know what that word meant, but that evening I thought I was feeling something similar.

Then I remembered that I was going to be fucking, and the cute, shapely boy ass that I was looking at would be fucked, in front of cameras now, and I would have plenty of opportunities to look at my beautiful body in action. I realize that sounds a bit narcissistic today, but then I was discovering for the first time that there were good qualities in myself that other people liked. I didn't really know what they were, nor do I really know them all today, and I certainly hadn't learned them from Mum.

You've got to understand what a cascade of wonderful feelings I had raining down inside of me because of that discovery. I didn't know which good qualities were ok to talk about or which ones would make me sound like an arrogant shit. I was simply looking in the mirror at that moment and seeing a boy who was lovable, a boy whom I actually loved. I nearly cried.

***

"So good to see you again, Trevor my boy," boomed the huge voice of Mr. Eastman. "It looks as though you've thoroughly enjoyed your victory drive. No clothes, and if I'm not mistaken, that's champagne in your hair?"

I grinned broadly at him, nodding and giggling. He turned to Mr. White, looked down at his cum-stained crotch, and said, "No trouble with the mother then, was there?" He turned his face back up and winked at Mr. White.

"None at all, Sir," he said. "We went with the obfuscation language and paid her first stipend. Only a thousand bob too. After that, she couldn't wait to see the back of us."

"Oh wonderful," lowed Mr. Eastman, himself showing the signs of having had a bit of champagne. "That is truly splendid news!"

He put his hand on my head, meaning to rumple my hair, but instead he caused drops of champagne to fly, and a few drops to run down my face. "Oh dear me, you did do the victory drive properly, didn't you!" I had to giggle as he wiped a drop off the tip of my nose with his finger. Then, looking down at my shriveled cock, he said, "Perhaps we should stand by the fire and you boys can warm up a bit, eh? Gentlemen?" he said, looking around the group.

As we made our way toward the fireplace, I realized that there were many other people in the room. Aside from the serving staff, everybody from the meeting with the owners and investors was there, including Robbie, and they were all dressed in tuxedos or evening gowns, and some actually did have fur coats. Several other adults were there as well, and I didn't recognize most of them, though I did recognize Khan. Robbie, Boris, Sebastian, and I were the only kids in the room, and Robbie was dressed in a formal jacket and tie, with an emblem on the jacket, and very short shorts.

However, the people who stood out most, lining the walls of the room, were naked men and women on low marble plinths, frozen still, mostly in pairs, in the act of having various forms of sex, as if they were all statues. There were men with women, men with men, women with women, large groups, smaller groups, even some alone on their plinth frozen in masturbation.

"Admiring my art, dear boy?" asked the booming voice of Mr. Eastman.

"Art, sir?"

"Why yes, my boy! Living statues. I find them more appealing than their marble counterparts, don't you agree? I must say the men have the more difficult part in this sort of art. Imagine keeping your John Thomas like that for twenty minutes," he pointed his finger at a man's erect penis that was inserted into a woman's ass, "without moving at all! Why I could never… but I'm an old man.

Now, in my youth I had stamina. Stamina, boy! You don't appreciate it now, but the time will come when you will be truly grateful to be in this line of work. With a lifetime of working several scenes during the day and carousing with your coworkers at night, you will maintain your youthful virility and control over your willy into your autumn years."

He tugged my shriveled cock playfully, but I wasn't sure I knew what he was talking about. I knew I needed to exercise to stay strong my whole life long, but I didn't think that was quite it.

I looked around at the living statues, and I thought about when I had seen grown-ups having sex. I could only think of twice. Earlier today in the bath hall at the studio, there was a woman giving a man a blowjob, and then there was Randy giving Mr. White a blowjob in the limousine. Here was a chance to see all kinds of sex, and to study grown-up bodies. I mean, I knew all about men's bodies ; I thought I did at the time, but Amber, a fourteen year-old girl at the studio, was the closest I had come to seeing a naked woman's body close up. She was elegant and pretty, but I didn't know what was inside her pussy. I supposed I would have plenty of opportunities to learn in my new line of work.

I began to wander from the fireplace, studying the bodies. I came across one group of at least twelve men and women in a big tangled pile, all twisted round each other. I couldn't tell which arms or legs belonged to which bodies or faces. None of the men or women in the room had any body hair or pubic hair, and they all had even tans and soft looking skin, so it was difficult to see a leg and know whether it belonged to a man or a woman. Even an ass could be difficult to distinguish as male or female if only part of it was visible. Several mouths, male and female, had cocks in them, or their tongues were protruding into pussies.

I walked around the group, trying to find where each person began and ended. Sometimes I would find cocks inserted into asses in the most unexpected places. On the left side there was a woman's pelvis exposed with her pussy wide open and her legs bent back into the pile. I couldn't tell where her face was. I leaned in slowly for a closer look at her pussy. I wanted to know what was in there. All I could see was pink, slimy stuff. It still wasn't enough for me to have a proper view inside. I looked around some more, and I must have giggled in surprise when I saw a woman's pussy with a cock in it, and another cock in her ass.

"Oh, so you like my group display, do you Trevor?" asked Mr. Eastman. Again, he looked at my cock, this time noticing that I had a boner, again. "This plinth has displayed many, many fine arrangements over the years. All original as well; there's none like it in the world."

"They're all so smooth," I said. "May I touch them, Sir?"

"Gently, my boy. Touch them gently."

I thought about feeling around inside that open pussy, but I was too nervous. I ran my hand over two smooth, relaxed thighs, not entirely sure whether they were male or female. "I can't tell the men from the women by looking at them, and I get confused. Their legs look lovely, but I don't want to look at the wrong ones. I only like boys. Well, sort of. What if I see a leg or an ass, and I think it's lovely, but it's a girl's?"

"Whoa ho! You've got it right there my boy, you've got it!"

"Got it, sir?"

"Indeed you have!" he said. "One of the most fascinating aspects of this large group display is the very thing you've just pointed out! When it comes to love, we should love when we feel the love, not after we've qualified whether someone is eligible for our love. Do you see?"

"I think so, Sir," I said, not understanding him a single bit.

He pointed to a part of the pile protruding from the front. "You enjoy the beauty of this ass right here, do you not? Is this ass beautiful, my boy?"

"Certainly it is, Sir."

"Come here and feel it. Does it feel like an ass you would want to fuck, my boy?"

I didn't want to fuck any grown-up's ass, but I felt it as he instructed. The ass was smooth and soft. It was shaped lovely and round. "Sir, this ass is perfectly lovely!" I could feel my boner swelling.

"Tell me boy," said Mr. Eastman, "how would you decide whether to have pleasure with that ass, with your head or with your cock?"

"Sir?"

"Look at your cock boy! Look at your cock! If you are attracted to the beauty of the ass, then why should it matter if its owner has a cock? The ass is just as lovely, eh?"

"Oh, I see Sir!" This time I was telling the truth, and his smile told me he knew it.

"We love what we feel, not what we know. Here at Frenetic Studios, our business is love, boy, love! Never forget that!"

"No Sir," I said, shaking my head.

"If we love, if we feel pleasure, we do not ask silly questions like what is or is not hanging from the other side of a beautiful ass. And you, my boy," he said, putting his hand on my cheek, "you have so much love and pleasure to offer this world, and at a time when the world so desperately needs it."

A bell rang, and all of the naked men and women disentangled themselves, stood up straight, and filed quietly out of the room through a door on the far side. Mr. Eastman surprised me by giving me a hug.

"Ah, the temporal nature of things. That which lives, changes, and then it is no more. How old are you boy? Nine? Ten?"

"Eight, Sir, nearly nine."

"Oh yes, yes, of course. Randy and I discussed this before. My boy, you will have an absolutely marvelous career with us in our Children's Division, simply marvelous," he said. "But alas, boys like you must grow up, and we will only have you for a short while."

That didn't sound good at all. "They said I could make movies here for five years if I wanted, probably more, Sir."

"And so you can, my boy, so you can, and much longer I hope, but when you've become an old man like me, and one day you shall do just that, you will realize how brief five years can be.

"This is the most joyous time of your life! You have youth, beauty, love, and everything else that matters! Do not let an old man's laments to Father Time sully this of all days! Benton! Enjoy the most beautiful time of your life!" Then he called out, "Benton! More champagne for our guests!" He hugged me again and chuckled at the wet spot on his tuxedo that my champagne-soaked hair made.

Just then another group of naked men and women filed out of the rear door, assumed their positions, and inserted their parts where they needed to go. A bell rang, and all were frozen still once more.

"Sebastian, come here boy," boomed Mr. Eastman. "See here, young Trevor needs some assistance. Why don't you see to his needs while I check on the champagne?"

Sebastian knelt in front of me, flashed me a smile, and began what felt like my hundredth blowjob of that day, and it felt so nice! My eyes turned toward the door as I noticed three men walking in, wearing tuxedos. It was Randy, Markus, and Mr. White. I hadn't noticed they'd left the room. I looked over the new pile of bodies on the plinth as Sebastian sucked me. I could see a woman's sparkling green eye and some of her brown hair through a gap toward the bottom. She had a rather large cock in her mouth. This was a lot like my earliest fantasies, being put on display for the world to see. That still turned me on. I found the parts of the pile that I liked, and I stroked them with my hands. My body jerked as I barked out another orgasm. That hadn't taken much time at all, I thought. Most of the people in the room turned to look at me, but that didn't seem to matter. It was a bit of a turn-on.

I kissed Sebastian deeply. I loved him so much, and I told him so. "Loves you much too Trevor Boy, so sweet."

***

Randy approached us with a file folder in his hands. "Well boys," he said, "it looks like a light day tomorrow, but an important one. Trevor, they want to finish St. Felix Academy, so you have a scene tomorrow afternoon. Big money this time, eh kid?

"Sebastian, you're scheduled for an afternoon scene as well. It's that gang bang with the construction crew we talked about–eight men I think. Remember not to swallow all of it this time. Leave a mess. You know better. You're a professional. The viewers love a messy face."

"Sorry one time more, Randy Man," said Sebastian. "Love taste of man to cum for mouth. Forget some time for leave mess."

Randy nodded and continued, "Boris has the day off, but he wants to see if he can pick up some fluff work on the ladyboy shoot, so nothing for anyone till the afternoon. You know what that means boys?"

"We don't have to wake up early?" I asked.

"We drink more champagne!" said Sebastian–and we did.

***

There were so many things that people seemed to like about other people's bodies and how they had sex with them. I always liked cocks, especially big ones, and I always liked lots of smooth skin. I liked licking and tasting people's body parts. I've always thought boys look beautiful with long hair, too, but being around the people from Frenetic was changing me. Boris really loved Asian lady boys, who were kind of like Jeanine, I guess. They were girls on the inside and boys on the outside, so they tried to make their outside match their inside. Then some of them were just boys who liked wearing girls' clothes and pretended to be girls for fun.

I had known for years that most boys liked girls, but some boys, like me, like other boys. Some girls like boys, and some like other girls, and some like both boys and girls. I learned later that I could really enjoy sex with the right girl, but I loved boys. Mr. Eastman seemed to like it when he couldn't tell whether someone was a boy or girl. I didn't know if that made him bisexual, someone who didn't care, or someone who just liked to guess.

Then there were people like Amber, a teenage girl I met at the studio who liked to be pushed around and treated rough. I thought Malcolm, another actor from the studio, was a boy who liked to push people around and be rough with them during sex, only I think he likes to do it more with other boys, like Ryan.

I was discovering new things about what I liked the whole time while I was there. Take Ryan, for example. He had worked as a fluff boy for Malcolm earlier that night. He was simply beautiful. He was eleven years old, tall, slender, blond, well tanned, and very, very graceful. I didn't think boys could be graceful at all, but he is, and it seems so natural to him. I learned that even a kind of motion, graceful movement, could be a turn-on to me.

Then there was Annie, magical Annie! I think he was also a very graceful boy who liked looking like a girl. Annie sometimes seemed like a delicate figurine, and I wanted to hold him and protect him. Sometimes he liked to dance and let his skirt fly, if he wore a skirt. Sometimes he liked to sing rock and roll songs at karaoke parties. He never looked delicate then! No matter what he did, it seemed to turn me on more and more. He seemed like such a mystery, and I thought I would never understand him completely. Maybe the mystery was the biggest turn-on, and I didn't want to understand him?

I wasn't sure, but I thought I was in love with Annie. It had only been one day since I'd met him, but nothing else mattered when he was in the same room as me. I had never felt that way about anyone before. Now that I'm twelve, I know I was infatuated at the time, but as time went on, I'm pretty sure I fell in love.

I was only eight, almost nine, and I don't know if a boy can actually fall in love at that age, but I was certain of it at the time. I wanted him so badly it hurt! I think that might have been because I hadn't felt much love at all in my life before becoming part of Frenetic, and I was afraid I would lose him as soon as I met him. I've spoken with Linda, the studio's pediatric psychologist, many times during our regular meetings about my feelings toward Annie, and she said she didn't have the correct answer, but that was a possible explanation. She couldn't tell me whether an eight year-old boy almost nine could even fall in love. It's frustrating when professionals like Linda can't answer questions for me, but really I love her. She's taught me how to live with not knowing things. If something feels good, I enjoy the good feeling without worrying too much about why it feels good, as long as it's not harmful.

There were still more ways people can love each other's bodies. I learned that some people have fetishes. They might love only a person's feet. Randy told me a lot of people are like that. They might go crazy for people who wear stockings and a suspender. They might like to be tied up or put in chains. They might be obsessed with rubber or leather clothes. Later in my career, I learned some people like to be peed on, or even shit on. I don't like to think about that one. Some people like to bugger animals, but Frenetic won't produce those kinds of films.

People can use almost any part of their body to touch almost any part of another person's body and get off on it. I'm sure there are two people right know rubbing their elbows together, bringing each other to orgasm.

***

Benton brought a tray of champagne glasses around, and I drank mine faster than I'd intended. When I went back for more, Benton said, "Certainly, Master Trevor, but I must inform you that Mr. Christianson has restricted me to allowing you only one of these," he held up a silver tray, on which was a tiny shot glass filled with champagne, "every five minutes, no sooner. It is the gentle man's concern that, as a boy of eight years, one might not yet have mastered the skill of pacing one's consumption of such beverages, and he does not wish one to suffer the unfortunate effects one might experience, should one over-consume. Indeed, pacing one's consumption is quite an advanced skill that many adults have not mastered, Sir."

I looked at the floor. I think Benton could sense my frustration and embarrassment, even though I only understood half of what he said. I really liked champagne now, better than fancy grape juice. I liked the way it made me feel, but I kept drinking it down so fast because I liked the juicy flavor. I knew Randy thought I was drinking too fast, and now Benton could only give me a little bit at a time.

"Might I suggest, Master Trevor, if one prefers, I shall track the time and pour the allotted amount into a chilled flute. One can then take the flute directly when it is as full as one wishes. One need only look to the tray at my station and take it at one's leisure, Sir." I guessed that "flute" was a fancy word for a glass.

I looked at Benton, who made me giggle for some reason. I think Randy was watching my drinking carefully and allowing me to edge on drunkenness without actually becoming drunk. I felt funny, and I felt happy. I wanted to sing, and to dance, and to have more champagne, but today I know that if I'd had much more, things would have gone very badly for me. Randy was looking after me, but he was also being quite generous.

"A splendid suggestion Benton, my good man," I said in the most posh accent I could muster, rising to my toes which was no easy feat after having had a few drinks. "Tell me Benton, have you any caviar?" I only asked for the caviar because I thought it was something a rich, posh person would say.

"Certainly, Master Trevor. I shall send for some immediately." He held up his white-gloved hand and beckoned a serving-man to his side, instructing him to "bring caviar for Master Trevor." I had never tasted it before, but if rich people liked it so much, I thought it must be really good.

***

I snuck up behind Boris and hugged him while he was chatting with Randy. We kissed, and I told him I loved him. "Such sweets Trevor Boy," he said. "Much love for you also!"

Then I caught Robbie's eye. I didn't mean to ignore him, but so far, I had been busy talking and getting sucked off, and he was also busy talking with important-looking people. It seemed we were both free now, and we met in the middle of the room. We shared a lovely hug and a kiss.

"Look at you, Trevor!" he exclaimed. He felt my wet hair and said, "That's champagne, isn't it?"

I giggled and said, "Yeah, we had a little fun on the drive here. Our clothes are soaked."

"Would you prefer to wear clothes?" he asked. "Benton will get you something to wear. Oh, and when boys visit Cockerel Manor, they are given a suit just like this one, or two or three of them; I don't remember. That way the staff know to treat you like a celebrity, and you never have to worry about what to wear to a party here. I'm sure you can have it now, or you can just carry it with you when you leave. I wonder why Eastman didn't present it to you when you arrived."

"Er… I think we might have looked like we were having too much fun naked." I felt nervous about what I was about to tell Robbie, but I said it anyway. "I like being naked in front of everybody. I mean I really like it! In a big crowd like this, I can look around, and there's always loads of people looking at me and smiling when I look back. Mum taught me that being naked in front of people was shameful and disgusting. She said that about being naked and anytime anyone said anything about any kind of sex–but she was wrong, wasn't she? I really like this! Am I shameful and disgusting, Robbie?"

Robbie smiled and put his hand on my shoulder. "I know exactly what you mean, mate, and of course you're not shameful or disgusting. You're a lovely boy!" I smiled when he said that, but I could feel my face getting warm. "That feeling you're talking about is really great when you're young and new and not used to it. It can lose its excitement after a few years though. Sometimes I'm still surprised, and I have those feelings all over again. It's like being nervous, but shaking your willy at the nervousness and telling it to get stuffed, right? That's how I felt."

"Yeah! It's like that! You must know everything about all this stuff," I told him. He dismissed my comment with a wave of his hand, but I persisted, "You're older than me. You've been living like this for years. You really helped me to get through that scene this afternoon. You helped me learn what being a dom is like, but your twelve, and I'm eight, nearly nine." Robbie seemed to blush a bit. "I really like you Robbie, and you're dead sexy. Can we be friends?"

"I was just doing what we do at Frenetic, mate, and of course we can be friends! With benefits if you like," he added with a grin. I tilted my head, not understanding that last bit. He grabbed my cock and started stroking it, saying with a sly smile, "With benefits, mate!" My poor cock was starting to feel sore from having stiffies all day. "You and me mate. You're really cute, and I think you give a great blowjob for a boy your size. Yeah, I can teach you a few things too, but there are a few things you're just a natural at."

"Yes please, I'd love to learn from you!" I said with excitement. "That's just what I wanted, an older boy to be my friend and help me sort all this out. I think that's like a big brother," I said, knowing it was not at all like my stupid big brother Ian.

He smiled, and it was a smile that I hadn't seen much in my life, a smile that meant he really was sincere, that he really wanted to be my friend, someone I could look up to and learn from, and have fun with. I felt warm inside. I jumped up into his arms, wrapping my legs around his waist and kissed and hugged him. When he set me back down, I sniffled and tried to wipe away a few tears before he saw them. All of these people were so lovely!

***

Mr. Eastman went to the back of the room, and the bell rang, signaling the live statues to leave. It didn't seem as if twenty minutes had passed yet. He then approached the piano as the naked men and women all filed out, and the pianist ended her song.

He stood in front of the piano and tapped his glass with a pen to attract everybody's attention. "Ladies, gentlemen, and boys, er, young gentlemen," he called out, "may I have your attention please?" The room went silent except for the sound of a serving-man as he finished pouring a glass of champagne for one of the guests.

"We all know why we are here this evening, I'm sure," he began. "We gather here to celebrate when Frenetic Studios Children's Division signs a new actor, but this evening we haven't signed a new actor. We have signed Trevor Hawkinson!"

He gestured to me, the party guests applauded, and I suddenly became very nervous. I tried to smooth down my hair, but I needed a hairbrush. "Trevor is brand new to our business, the business of sharing love and happiness, and let me assure you, he is mightily skilled at both." More applause.

"He is a true natural, and I mean that most literally. He comes to us from a very humble beginning. His heart is full of love and joy, but Randy, Virgil, and Markus, who visited his home and family today, have sadly reported that these gifts were not exactly nurtured in that environment. He came by them on his own, naturally.

"The pornography trade is, by its barest definition, about selling pictures and videos of people having sex. For most production houses, that is what they create, and it is all they create. Most of them use only one camera, and sometimes that is just a cell phone. However, anyone who has worked with Frenetic knows that our product goes far beyond such shambled assembly line approaches. We seek actors who exude love and happiness. Look at this boy… come here Trevor."

Nervously, very nervously, I walked to Mr. Eastman. With a strength I didn't imagine he possessed, he lifted me and placed me atop the piano. "Stand up, would you boy? I want everyone to have a good look at you." I obeyed.

"Just look at this boy," he continued–and they did. I was also looking at them, and every eye in the room was pointed at me. There was a collective call of ooh's and ahh's, and I felt myself get yet another boner from all of the people looking at me naked on top of that piano. "Look at that!" cried Mr. Eastman, pointing at my stiffie. "He cannot help it! What gives him pleasure is sharing himself with others! Look into his eyes, and he will give you joy! Listen to his voice and he will bring warmth to your heart. See him make love and you will visit the very height of ecstasy!" Even more applause. I had just orgasmed a half-hour ago from Sebastian's blowjob, but I wanted to touch myself. All of those people looking at me, and I wasn't really sure how they felt, but it seemed to be something pretty good, and I guess I was giving that feeling to them. It was so hot! I stood tall and proud, my cock also standing tall.

"We don't get very many boys who so deeply love to share themselves with others like this. Yes, we have auditioned many who have this fantasy, but when it comes to their work onscreen, they seem to read their lines and go through the motions."

That was it. I decided I was going to do it. I reached down and lightly rubbed my cock with my open hand. "You see?" cried Mr. Eastman, and of course the crowd cheered again. "Look how you make him feel? He feels your love. He does not ask for it, and I do not think he expects it, but he gives you so much in return. I think the most remarkable fact of all is that Trevor here does not understand what I'm talking about, do you, my boy?"

I slowly shook my head, beginning to feel a little nervous again. "Trevor, you will fully realize, and I hope it happens soon, exactly why you are so loved here at Frenetic Children's Division, and exactly what you give to people with your work here. Maybe not today, but it will come to you. With that knowledge, everyone here knows that you will put forward the best, most expressive performances anyone has seen in the history of child pornography, and let me tell you that history is a long one." Loud applause.

"It seems rather crass to talk about sales expectations at a time like this, so I will not. I think you all know the kinds of things I would bore you with anyway. Instead, I would ask for what you all really want, and be gentle, because I am springing this on him as it were without any opportunity to prepare."

He turned to me. "Trevor, would you please say a few words to these kind people?" PANIC! "Don't worry about being eloquent, dear boy. They are all your friends. Just tell your friends about yourself and why you have chosen to work with Frenetic. Will you do us that great honor?"

I let go of my limp cock and began to fidget. This wasn't fair! I'm standing naked on a piano in front of about a hundred people it was less than that, but it felt like much more, and he wants me to give a speech!

Boris, Sebastian, and Robbie, my three favorite boys in the whole world, I still thought of Annie as a girl then, even though I knew he was really a boy who just liked to be pretty, moved to the front of the crowd and smiled at me. They might never know how much that helped. I closed my eyes, took a few deep breaths, and began.

"Hi, er, I'm, my name is Trevor." I looked down at Boris' beautiful smile and said, "Hawk… Boy, I mean Trevor Hawkinson." Boris clapped his hands because he knew what I was thinking. Soon the rest of the crowd joined in.

"Well, I guess people sometimes choose fake names in this work, and maybe I should be Hawk Boy or something." A chuckle went through the crowd. "Or maybe Boy Hawk. I dunno. Um, I guess I'm supposed to tell you about me. Er… I'm eight, almost nine, and I live in London.

"I'm sorta angry with Mum right now because what she has always said about being naked isn't true. Same thing with sex. It just isn't true! I love it, and I love doing it in front of people, and with all sorts of people, and I don't feel at all shameful and disgusting!" I was almost shouting now.

"I feel beautiful, and I feel loved by everyone I've met so far!"

I looked down at the three boys in front and I could feel my eyes doing precisely what I didn't want them to do. I kept looking down, hoping it would stop before I had to wipe something from my cheeks, but everyone was cheering and applauding loudly. At least that gave me a break to collect myself. I took another deep breath and looked back up. As I did, tears fell down on both cheeks. The applause and cheering suddenly got even louder, and I didn't know why. I rubbed my eyes, and the pianist handed me a tissue. I wiped my face with it and blew my nose. Suddenly a serving-man appeared in front of me, holding a tray up to me.

"Your tissue, Master Trevor," he said. I put the snotty wet tissue on the tray, stood upright, and cleared my throat.

"I don't know why you lot like to cheer when you see a boy cry like that. I suppose there are loads of things I haven't learned yet, but I have learned loads from everyone at the studio. And not just about working in child porn either. The kids there have shown me that it's ok to trust each other and that meeting strangers is really easy. At school, I always had to be careful when I met someone new. It's really hard to understand why you lot are all so nice to me without even knowing me.

"Everybody seems to like it when I get a stiffie, but right now I feel a bit scared, and a bit serious. Mr. Eastman, well, I don't know who he was talking about a minute ago, but it didn't sound like me. I'm a poor boy from London. I'm nobody special. I don't feel special anyway. Well, I never have felt special, but you all treat me like I am.

"Mr. Eastman says someday I'll understand. Well, maybe he's right. All I know today is that I've got a really cute ass!"

I turned around and shook my ass for the tumultuous crowd. When I turned back to face them, I felt another stiffie rise. I reached down and stroked it slowly to see if they liked it. Oh yes, they liked it. I wasn't about to wank and have a boygasm while I was standing on this piano. I might fall and break my neck. I felt an incredible rush as the crowd responded to everything I did! I turned around again and bent over, spreading my ass cheeks, then waving to them between my legs. Wow. They went crazy!

I turned to face the cheering crowd again. They wouldn't stop. If you want to know the truth, it was getting a little unnerving, because I had one more important thing I wanted to say. I looked at Mr. Eastman, hoping he would know what to do. He held up both of his hands, waving to the crowd, and said "please" a bunch of times, so I did the same. They eventually settled down.

"Thanks," I said. "I just wanted to tell you one more thing. These three boys here in front," I pointed to Boris, Sebastian, and Robbie, "I have nothing that they don't have. I'm serious. They can prance about up here and wank like a silly prat too. If I have so much love in my heart, they each have twice as much as I've got! I've only known Boris and Sebastian for two days, and I just met Robbie today, and I know that whatever I've got, they've got it too!"

"Because no use condoms!" shouted Boris. The room erupted with laughter, but I didn't get it.

When the laughter died down, I said, "Anyway, I guess that's what I have to say about me. If you don't mind, I want to get down from here now and get some kisses from my friends! I love you all!"

I crouched down and jumped to the floor. The three boys surrounded me, all kissing me furiously. Not passionate, sexy kisses, but happy kisses. When I eventually looked up, it seemed the whole crowd was trying to get to me! I held onto the boys tightly. I wanted to be with them. I knew the strangers were all lovely people, but I wasn't ready! I didn't want to be trampled! "Help!" I whimpered to the boys. "What do I do?"

"What you do? You kiss me, silly Trevor Boy," said Sebastian–and I did.

Randy, Mr. Eastman, and a few of the serving-men eventually got the crowd settled. Mr. Eastman reminded them that I was still a very young boy, and that there were better ways for them to show me their love, and maybe better times to introduce themselves. I was very grateful.

When everything was calm, Randy brought me a full glass of champagne and said, "Here. You could probably use this right now. Drink it right down if you like. You've earned it."

I was shocked to see him suddenly choke up. He gathered himself and used his handkerchief to wipe everything dry. Then he said, "You are so beautiful, Trevor! You don't believe me or anyone else when we say that, but this event is being recorded. Your speech was just recorded, and some day, maybe a few years from now, I will play the video for you. Then you will understand why everybody loves you so much!"

I couldn't seem to get away from that kind of talk. I looked at the boys and rolled my eyes, but they all just smiled at me. I drank my champagne down in one. The pianist resumed her playing, but this music was energetic, and it made me want to dance.

"Oh! America Rag music!" said Boris with a smile. "Love rag music time! Yay for Scott Joplin rag! Is very nice! We dance boys?"

***

We stayed by the piano for the rest of the night dancing. Sebastian and I snuck up on Robbie at one point and pulled his shorts and undies down. He just stepped out of them and danced with a naked bottom. Most of the adults joined us at one time or another, but they kept their distance. They were doing that to be nice, but I actually wanted to meet some of them, so I danced over and chatted them up. I got loads of kisses that way.

A lot of them were actors in the Adult Division. They wished me well, and some of them said they'd love to work with me some time soon, and others told me they'd love to have me fluff for them if I had free time. It seemed a common practice for adults to cross over and work in the Children's Division, and a less-common practice for kids to fluff in the Adult Division. Most of them assured me that I would always have work in the Adult Division when I grew up.

But I loved the Children's Division so much! I wanted to work there forever! I loved boys, even boys who were a lot older than me. I wanted to work with boys forever, but I would grow up and learn new things. Maybe when I became a man, I would like men. In fact, I already liked men, but I loved boys. It was also getting late, and I drank as much champagne as Benton allowed. I really felt it in my head when I drank that whole glass after my speech. Today I know that things that sound great when I've been drinking don't always sound great the next day.

As we were leaving, Mr. Eastman presented me with my Cockerel Manor suit, which was actually a small garment bag containing three identical suits, and a separate bag with three pairs of matching shoes and caps with the Cockerel Manor crest on the front. Benton handed me a cloth bag with handles. Inside the bag were my cleaned and neatly folded clothes from the limo, and the £200 from my shorts pocket was folded and placed inside a money clip that looked like it was made of gold. It was engraved with my name. There was some sort of receipt clipped in with the money. It showed my name as Master Trevor Hawkinson, the amount of money, and a whole bunch of initials on it. "Wow," I muttered.

"You'll soon get used to little perks like that, Trevor," said Randy. "Let's get home."

Sebastian and I decided not to get dressed, but Boris put his black satin shorts and his black t-shirt on before the four of us climbed into the back of a Rolls. The driver put the small garment bag with my suits in the trunk, along with our laundry bags.

When we got home, or rather, to Randy's house, Randy retrieved my money from the car safe. It had been transferred there by Mr. Eastman's staff. The driver walked us to the door, carrying our bags. I turned to him and kissed him on the lips because I wanted one last memory of my first signing party. He smiled and tugged my cock, saying, "How can you not know that you are so fucking lovely?"

xxx

12:30 AM, Tuesday, July 17

The three of us boys climbed into the king size bed in the guest room at Randy's house. Boris, the Boy in Black, was once again naked, of course. Randy told us we could sleep as long as we liked the next morning as he headed to his bedroom. He stopped short and asked, "Does anyone fancy a good ass fuck? You boys got me really horny at the party, and it would be a shame to wank alone when there are three incredibly beautiful, naked boys here tonight!"

Boris and I both grinned at Sebastian, who was smiling brightly. "Yes, Randy Man please!" he said as he got up. He scurried off down the hall yelling, "I want your big fuck in my ass please!" Boris and I giggled as we heard Sebastian howling. Boris and I kissed and stroked each other's cocks. I could not believe how much had happened in that one day. We both fell asleep with our cocks in each other's hands and our lips barely touching. Love is so beautiful!

Chapter 12
Morning Wood

I have always hated alarm clocks. On my first day as a new child porn actor, Randy and Sebastian gave Boris and me a treat. I had a scene to do in a couple hours, so Randy thought it best if we didn't get a 'happy ending' to our wake-up call, but every boy gets morning wood, and this was just another in a series of my dreams come true. No boy has truly experienced a blowjob until they've had one from Sebastian! He has a sixth sense. He feels it with you.

10:30 AM, Tuesday, July 17

Boris and I woke up the way all boys wish they could wake up every day. Our alarm clock was a blowjob. Randy did Boris, and Sebastian woke me. That boy is always smiling, and when he smiles, it's impossible not to feel happy. What a way to wake up!

We didn't get a happy ending to our alarm call, and that was ok. I was still a bit sore from yesterday. "What time is it?" I asked Randy.

"It's half past ten," he replied. "Call is at noon, so we need to think about breakfast. How do you feel this morning Trevor? Do you feel sick at all from the champagne?"

"No, I feel fine," and it was true. I think Randy had done a good job keeping me at a proper pace. I felt really good from the champagne, but I bet if he'd have let me have much more I'd have gotten sick.

"Good, I'm glad to hear that. Mr. Eastman only serves the highest quality."

Boris put his hand on his forehead and let out a soft moan. "Is very good champagne. Easy to drink much. Too much some time. Love go to celebrate for Mr. Eastman house!"

"You should know better, Boris," said Randy. "You've been to a lot of parties at Cockerel Manor. You know how to pace yourself with champagne."

"Yes, but was special day. Much fun in car, drink some, pour some on Trevor Boy, drink more, pour more on Trevor Boy. Easy for forget how much. Is ok. Trevor Boy happy I think." He turned to smile at me, and I gave him a loving kiss. "Was very good party, no?"

I smiled and nodded at him, and when I did, I felt a little wave of dizziness. "Wow, what was… Randy, when people get sick from drinking alcohol, do they feel dizzy the next day?"

"Oh yes," he said with a grin. "Maybe you're not so steady after all? We'll get you some breakfast, and I'll show you my hangover cure for boys. If you think you might get sick before you eat, you know where the toilet is."

I didn't feel sick at all, just a little dizzy when I turned my head too fast. Randy's hangover cure for boys was half orange juice and half fizzy water. Breakfast was a lovely fry-up with beans on toast. Randy used iron pans that made everything taste wonderful.

Before I left the table, I was feeling right as rain. Randy told me later that he was a little nervous because I was due on the set for my first scene as a Frenetic boy with a real contract. He wanted to make sure we made a good impression.

I wanted to wear something fun to the studio, and Sebastian had loads of clothes. So did Boris, but his were too big for me. Well, so were Sebastian's, but they were close. He helped me choose a beautiful, sexy outfit after breakfast and a shower. None of us had worn anything for breakfast, not even Randy. I had told him last night many times how sexy his thin satin shorts were, and he let me choose from five different colors. I wore the bright white ones with black stripes. I didn't want to wear undies with those shorts, so I brought along a sexy green satin pair of bikini undies that Sebastian recommended because I wanted to be part of the underpants game at tea. Nobody would guess they were mine! I looked around Sebastian's huge closet, and a white satin jacket caught my eye. He said it was a girls jacket, but that just meant it was shorter than a boys jacket. We decided that if I wore it open it would look super-sexy without a shirt.

For my feet, Sebastian got excited and told me he had just the thing. He was always excited. He rummaged around the floor of his closet and found a pair of long white socks with black stripes around the tops. They didn't have a heel in them, so I didn't know which way was supposed to go up.

He said, "Silly Trevor Boy, these called tube sock. No matter which side go for up. Pull all way up at knee. Look very sexy on boy with small shorts. Make people wonder what looks like rest of leg. Very old is tube sock." I loved wearing Sebastian's sexy clothes, and I was the opposite of the Boy in Black.

Boris was wearing black jeans, black shoes, black socks, and a black t-shirt. I even watched him pull on a pair of black undies. How interesting. Sebastian said he never wore jeans in the summer because it was too hot, so he wore what looked like an old pair of leather shorts that were once black before some of the color got cracked and peeled off of them. They looked very tight on him, and of course they were very short. He decided he wanted to wear something open on top, so he wore a bright yellow button-up long sleeved shirt that he tucked into the shorts but left open at the front. On his feet he wore black sandals and a gold chain around his left ankle. He put another gold chain around his neck, and a very thin gold belt around his shorts. It was far too thin to hold anything up, but it was cute. He topped things off with a bright yellow cowboy hat. He was stunning! I'm not sure he was stunning in a way that was completely good, but he was certainly stunning, and there was no mistaking who he was. Sebastian was a flamboyant boy, and I think his self-confidence was a big part of what made him so bloody sexy.

I was surprised to see him finish his ensemble with a pair of gold wire-rim eyeglasses. "I didn't know you wore glasses," I said.

"Usually not wearing them. Sometime only. For school must always wear them, and for read lines. Don't like them, but better than contact lens. Hurt eyes. Glasses not hurt eyes, but go down nose and bother ear."

"They look really cute on you," I said, feeling a sudden nervousness because I had not even thought about studying my lines for the scene that afternoon.

"Oh Trevor Boy, you being sweetie boy again," he said just before he kissed me. "I wear for you, ok Trevor Boy? When with you, wear glasses. Sometime. Not all time." He always had the most joyful smile! I wasn't trying to be a sweetie boy or anything; I thought they looked really nice on him. Gold glasses and blond hair look good together.

I put my money clip in an inside pocket in the jacket. It really was short, which surprised me because Sebastian was taller than I was. "That for they see your pretty waist and sexy belly," he told me. "Always short for when I wear. Look very good for you."

I thought I might ask Randy if we could go shopping for some clothes for me. My clothes were boring and ordinary, but Sebastian's clothes were fun!

***

We gathered in the sitting room when we were all dressed, and Randy handed scripts to Sebastian and me. They were very thin, perhaps four or five pages each, and that included the page with just the title.

"These are just scene scripts," he told me. "Yesterday they had to give you the full script for the whole movie because that's all they had. These have everything you need for the scenes you're doing today. You can see it's not much. In porn we don't talk as much as in other movies."

"Much busy for fucking," said Boris, not looking up from a game he was playing on his iPhone.

"Well, yes, that's pretty much it, I mean, people don't buy our movies because of the gripping drama and subtle character development," Randy explained. "They want to see you having great sex that they wish they could have with you.

As you know, at Frenetic, we give them much more. Most porn production houses don't even have scripts for actors. We know that nobody really wants to watch porn. They want to be with you boys, fucking you, playing with you, and feeling your love. We give them as much of that experience as we can. That's why we do so much work in the productions, like using eight cameras instead of one, like making sure everybody feels love so they can show love to the viewers, like having actual scripts and dialog and even good acting! Trevor…" he began.

"Hawk Boy," I heard myself say. "I'm Hawk Boy now. Boris gave me that name, and it was by accident, but I love Boris, and I love the name he gave me, Trevor Hawk Boy. Can I have that as my name in the movies? I mean Hawk Boy?"

I didn't know why I had said this to him at that exact time. I certainly hadn't planned on talking about it yet, but I had been thinking about it. I thought the name sounded cool, and it told people I was a boy… a boy hawk maybe?

I was surprised I had said this, but Randy looked more surprised. "Well, er, Hawk Boy, I'm not sure what to say yet. You know most of the actors don't use their real names, so this was going to come up eventually. Hawk Boy, you say?" I nodded. "Or was it Trevor Hawk Boy?"

"Er, I'm not sure. Everybody knows I'm Trevor, but Hawk Boy sounds cool, doesn't it?"

"Well, the important thing to think about is how you look on the screen, what kind of personality you show the audiences," he said. "It's important that your working name be something that people can identify with who you are. Think about it. If you bought a porn film to watch at home, or online, and you read that someone named King Khan was going to be in it, would you expect an eight year-old boy? No, you'd probably expect a big, aggressive man with a big cock, possibly of a race other than Caucasian."

I nodded. I hadn't thought about that. "I tell you what. I'll have a talk with Mr. Eastman this afternoon. I'll tell him your idea and see what he thinks of it. He might have some different suggestions for you, but it's important for him to know what you want. I rather like Hawk Boy, come to think of it," he said, stroking his chin. "It sounds a bit Native American though, don't you think?"

I shrugged my shoulders. I didn't know much about America, and people had told me that a lot of movies and telly programs were stupid because they showed Native Americans as dumb people who lived in stupid ways. Maybe I could help them by using a Native American name? Or maybe that would be bad because people who thought Native Americans were stupid might have thought I was stupid too. Racism was so stupid in so many complicated ways if a white English boy could be thought of as stupid for being Native American.

"Give it some thought, Hawk Boy. While you are here, you get to choose who you are. If you choose to be Hawk Boy, then that's what you'll be called here, right boys?"

"Right, is Hawk Boy," said Boris, while Sebastian nodded.

But that made it even more confusing! I liked it a lot when they called me Trevor Boy. I loved my new Russian friends, and I felt special whenever I heard either of them call me Trevor Boy. That was something only they called me. It was my way of knowing that I was their special friend and they were my special friends. Boris could tell I was confused, and maybe a little upset for some reason, so he came to me with a big Boris hug, and a kiss of course. He sat down beside me on the settee and said, "Is no matter. You are confusing for yourself?"

I told them what I thought of their special name for me and how much it meant to me. They agreed they would continue to call me Trevor Boy, and they reminded me that my name at home did not have to be the same as my name at work. I asked Randy, "Is it ok if they just call me Hawk Boy in the movies? Or Boyhawk would be ok. Maybe Trevor Hawk?"

"Sure," said Randy. "You can have a name just to put on the films, but you will also have to use that name when you meet the public, so let's make it a good one, ok?" I nodded.

Randy had told me that kids from the studio sometimes go to film screening events when we make a really expensive movie, and that fans would be there wanting my autograph. He said some of the kids give talks to groups of people who are interested in the porn business. We always have to use our working names for those events. Choosing a name was very important.

"Ok, I'll talk it over with Mr. Eastman and we'll see what we can come up with."

***

For the next half hour, we rehearsed our lines and read what sorts of things we were going to be doing for our scenes. I didn't have many lines in this scene either. Mostly I just had to be horrible to Adrian again while we spied on the same group of older kids. Then the older kids would discover us, and they would have their way with us. They weren't going to make me fuck that French girl Claire, but I was going to be fucked by Jeanine. They switched that in the script yesterday, Randy said. He said it was because I was a brand new little who hadn't seen the medical specialist yet, and Malcolm had a really big cock. That meant they needed to have people fuck me only if they didn't have a huge cock. I was disappointed by that, and I told Randy.

"It's studio policy, Hawk Boy," he said. "They have to be careful. Their medical staff don't know you yet."

"But you know me really well, and you've even fucked me with your big willy. Yours is ten times as big as Malcolm's! And you saw me last night with Boris!"

I hadn't meant to shout, and I was sorry. Randy was so nice, and I had no excuse for being angry with him. "I'm sorry for shouting, Randy. You've been so wonderful to me, and I think you have to do what the studio says, right?" It seemed that was the day for everyone to hug me and comfort me because I was becoming upset for silly reasons. Now it was Randy's turn.

"Hawk Boy, you're wrong and you're right. You're wrong because you don't have to apologize to me for feeling upset. I know you're excited about playing with big cocks and being fucked in front of the camera, and you must be disappointed to hear this. I understand.

"Remember when we were in the tree? I told you then. I know a lot about boys. Boys shout sometimes when they get upset. Your task is to see that it doesn't happen very often, and that you are careful with your words. You didn't say anything disrespectful to me. Thank you for that. And you're right, I have to do what the studio says, and so do you. We both have contracts that say so."

This new life was so different from my old life. I didn't know why I seemed to be crying so much, but I had another cry while Randy hugged me. When he saw that I was feeling better, he tickled me a little. Then he looked into my eyes, and I could feel his hand rubbing my ass through those sexy shorts. He was smiling, and so was I.

"I tell you what," he said. "You like my cock because it's even bigger than Malcolm's, right? I'll give it to you tonight if you still want it."

That made me smile, and it made Sebastian look nervous. "Oh Sebastian," I said. "You have to Share Randy Man! His cock is beautiful!"

"No is that, Trevor Boy. Is studio needs no boy bottom who like huge cock. Have me already."

"Ooh! Sebastian!" I couldn't tell if he was kidding. The boy could act. He sure had Markus going last night with his two thousand pound fee for a blowjob. "No one could do what you do–and I really don't want to. I mean, bananas and three huge man cocks mashing them up in your ass? I think I'd pass out! No mate, your ass is special, and nobody can compete with it. Certainly not me.

"I just want a good fuck by someone with a big cock. Not a huge monster like one of those three men from yesterday. Just a nice big one, like Randy's, and only if he's gentle at first." Randy smiled and nodded.

"Thank you for much, Trevor Boy," said Sebastian. "All times boy come to studio, say he like many huge cocks for in his ass, then give gang bang movie for boy, and no movie for poor Sebastian. Then camera go on, men fuck in him, and boy cry when second, maybe third man try to go in for ass. Hurt for him too much. He not is bad, this boy. He want movie, Sebastian want movie. He want many big man cock, Sebastian want many big man cock. Is ok. No boy know first before men fuck him. Need try first, then know how hurt him. Happen all times. Scene is ruin, boy hurting very bad, maybe not come back for other movie, and Sebastian need fluff for day, lost acting money, lost kink bonus."

"So you're really a special boy at Frenetic?" I asked. "They keep telling me I'm special, but you can do things with your ass that I could never do." I didn't think I was cheering him up very well. "That must be horrible for you when that happens. I promise I'll never tell them I want a cricket bat in my ass, a gang bang with more than six men with huge cocks, or any fresh fruit up my ass at the same time I'm being fucked."

There it was! That magical, infectious Sebastian smile that always came with a hug and a kiss. "Randy Man," he said urgently, "look for time! Must go for studio or late!"

Chapter 13
Dressing Room 2

Sebastian had gotten into his costume for a gang bang scene with eight construction workers, but when I arrived at my dressing room, my St. Felix Academy costume with its embarrassingly short shorts was missing. Then the gayest man in all of Britain came to the rescue. His timing was just… great.

11:30 AM, Tuesday, July 17

I sat with Sebastian in the back seat of Randy's Land Rover on the way to the studio. I told Boris it was because he was wearing long trousers, and I wanted to stare at Sebastian's bare legs. Really, we needed to use the time to read lines with each other, but it was also his legs. I had the thought that I was like Randy. I really liked boys' legs, especially their thighs, and their asses. Maybe I liked their legs because they were attached to their asses. Or maybe it was because it felt so good when people touched mine. It felt like a private area that no one had touched before Randy did in the tree.

I don't really know why. Legs are just ordinary body parts. Why hadn't people touched mine before? Well, Ian had punched me just about everywhere, but why hadn't anyone touched me there in a nice way? Why weren't we allowed to show them in school? Preston Primary wouldn't allow boys to wear shorts to school, and a lot of us grumbled about it.

I had to stroke Sebastian's bare thighs a few times. It happened when I sat next to him and he looked all sexy. I had to touch him. I shouldn't have done that so often because then he got turned on and distracted, but that's exactly what happened to me when I just looked at him. Maybe after I fucked a few hundred cute boys I'd get used to seeing them and start to control myself.

Then Sebastian got all giggly and playful with me. I think we were distracting Randy. He said maybe we should just climb in the back for a good shag and have done with it. I knew right away when I took off my seat belt that he hadn't meant that seriously. He slowed the car down and said, "I was only joking, Hawk Boy. Please put your seat belt back on, there's a good lad." Sebastian and I had a proper giggle-fest anyway.

When we arrived in the studio car park, he told us both we really needed a good hard fuck. Hearing that gave me a rush, knowing that I really was going to get a good fuck soon. I could feel my cock swelling against the smooth satin shorts, which felt nice and made me even harder. I reached down front and propped my boner upright. I could feel the wind tickling my ribs as it blew through the too-small open jacket. I watched Sebastian get out of the car, and I hoped I looked half as sexy as he did. I certainly felt sexy. I reminded myself that I needed to ask Randy about shopping for sexy clothes of my own. Boris and Randy walked behind us across the car park to the entrance, with Boris whistling all the way and making comments about how sexy we were. We wiggled our asses and dropped our shorts a few times. My boner was not going away!

12:00 PM, Tuesday, July 17

"Do you remember where your dressing room is, Trevor?" asked Randy as Sebastian and I checked in at the front desk. I was Trevor again. We were at work.

"I show him," said Sebastian as he took my arm.

Boris' giggling behind us made me wonder if he thought we were a pair of right proper little queens. That thought made me happy. I'd never felt like a queen or a sissy boy, but I was trying everything. It was all brand new. Maybe I was a sissy queen? For the first time in my life I felt it was ok to even consider that question. For now I would be a queen with Sebastian. I should have worn pink. When we went shopping, I'd have to remember to buy something pink and queeny.

"I make sure he find stage for scene. Trevor Boy scene is for stage two, no?"

"That's right," said Randy, "and your gang bang is stage five. Lots of lube, kid, and make sure to do your exercises before and after."

"Always do these, Randy Man," Sebastian said with a smile.

Poor Boris. He had to watch our cute, sexy asses strutting off to do work on-camera while he took the long walk to the fluff locker room, hoping one of the ladyboys would want his services. He wasn't even allowed to stay and watch the filming if he didn't have work to do. He couldn't use the bath hall either because he wasn't acting that day, but at least he could hang out in the tea room.

We walked through the reception area, and then started down a long corridor, but the dressing rooms were on the left side of the corridor. Mine was the seventh door, right near the lobby. It had the same "Trevor Hawk" name card that had been there the day before. I could have remembered where it was myself. It made me wonder, though, if Mr. Eastman had already decided my working name would be Trevor Hawk. I thought it was because there wasn't enough room to spell out my full name, but maybe I was wrong?

"Ok Trevor Boy, meet you here this spot after twenty minutes. Is good? Then go for stage 2."

"Ok," I said, leaning with my back against my dressing room door, grinning at him, with my borrowed white shorts making me feel like Sebastian was already giving me a hand job. I wrapped my arms around him and kissed him passionately. I know we made sloppy noises as we drenched each other's faces with kisses. We got several encouraging looks from passersby. I lifted my right leg, wrapped it around his smooth thighs, and held him close. We pressed our boners into each other. Neither of us had to worry about cumming right before shooting a scene because we were both still dry. We could still fake it like the women did. I felt his hand reach inside my shorts and take my cock, holding it gently.

He pulled his head back and said, "You know, Trevor Boy, is not rules that we do this play one hour before shooting start. Must have wait. Director like energy for horny boy. When boy horny and not pretend, make better for movie. Is rules. So sorry Trevor Boy."

He kissed me sweetly, but he did not take his hand off of my cock. He looked at his hand. Then he looked at me and giggled. "Not want hand back Trevor Boy! Is not easy! You help for me, ok?"

I smiled and said, "Ok!" I leaned back in and kissed him softly, gently, and then I pinched him on the back of his thigh, a trick I learned from my brother Ian, only he never did it playfully. Sebastian pulled his hand back so fast I was worried he'd pulled the skin right off my cock.

"AIIEE!" he cried. He jumped back and said, "Trevor Boy very, very naughty!" He kissed me again and said "Loves for Trevor Boy so much. Now is fifteen minutes."

"I love you too, sweet Sebastian!" I had never called anybody that before. I knew I had a lot to learn about love, and I was trying my best.

***

A fabulous sight greeted me as I entered my dressing room. There were flower arrangements and gift bags everywhere, with cards congratulating me. Most were from the bigshots at the party last night, some were from the adult actors I met; two gifts were from the directors I had worked with, and the kids had bought me a bunch of stuff too.

Over at the makeup table there was another bucket with a bunch of root beer on ice, and one half-sized bottle of champagne with a card from Randy that just said "Slowly." I didn't know what to do! I felt like having some more of those tears of joy, but then I remembered that I had a tight schedule. I needed to change into my costume and meet Sebastian in twelve minutes. I didn't have any time for opening gifts or drinking more champagne.

Another look around my room showed that my costume was not there. Was I supposed to go somewhere and get it? I didn't know, but I needed to find out quickly. I thought it was supposed to be hanging on the clothes rack by the door, but there was only a dressing gown there, which seemed an odd thing to have in a porn dressing room, and a pair of slippers.

I sat down at my makeup table and tossed the green satin bikini undies on the tabletop. I had to think. Then I noticed the phone, and I remembered that I was supposed to dial 222 if I needed anything. Well, I needed a costume, so I picked up the handset and dialed. "Dressing room services, how may I help you, Mr. Hawk?"

"Er, hi. I'm in my dressing room here now," I said nervously. "I don't seem to have a costume here though. Can you tell me, am I supposed to have a costume here? Or do I need to go get it from somewhere? I'm supposed to be getting ready for my scene."

"Oh yes, Mr. Hawk, that does seem to be a problem," said the woman's voice. "If it's not already in your dressing room that usually means that you will not need a costume for your scene. Are you certain that your scene requires you to wear a costume?"

"I definitely start out wearing clothes. It says so in the script," I told her. "It's a school uniform with a jacket and very short trousers. I don't wear it very long, mind you, but they had one for me yesterday."

"Oh yes Sir, Mr. Hawk, I see you are in Studio two working on the set of St. Felix Academy, and you require the boys' school uniform, is that correct? The boys' uniform?" she asked. I told her it was, and she said, "Ok, thank you Sir. In that film we have a few boys wearing the girls uniforms, so I wanted to be sure. I will call your stage manager Judine and find out what has happened to your costume and then call you back. I'm very sorry for the delay. We'll get straight to the bottom of this, Sir."

"Um, thank you," I said as I hung up the phone.

She kept calling me Sir. That sounded weird. But she didn't sound nervous about my costume, so I decided I wouldn't be either. I opened a root beer and turned on the TV. I pressed several buttons on the remote until I found a football match between two clubs in Ghana. I looked over the pile of gifts, wondering what they contained. Was I supposed to wait before opening them? Did Randy intend for me to drink the champagne before shooting the scene? I needed Benton! I needed someone who could tell me what I was supposed to be doing without making me feel stupid. Benton had to tell me I needed to slow down my drinking at the party the night before, but he was nice about it, and he made it seem ok.

12:30 PM, Tuesday, July 17

"Hello Mr. Hawk. This is Dressing Room Services calling you back, Sir," said the voice on the phone. "I'm afraid there's been a mix-up concerning your costume. Judine said there was some disorganization at the last minute getting you fitted yesterday, and that resulted in your costume being mislabeled and returned to the costume shop instead of being sent to your dressing room after it was cleaned. She asked that I convey Nellie's apologies, and that I let you know she will contact you directly when she has your costume together again. In the meantime, Judine suggests that you relax and enjoy the amenities available in your dressing room or in the bath hall. She does ask, however, that you avoid getting your hair wet at this point, as it could delay things having it blow-dried. Will this be satisfactory, Sir?"

"Er, yeah, that's fine. I'll just wait here and watch the footie then. Thanks."

I opened the back door to my dressing room to take a peek at the bath hall. There were two men snogging on a bench, a girl trying to fit two cocks in her mouth down by the pool, and, I would not have believed it if I hadn't seen it, a boy with his hand in all the way up to his elbow inside a woman's pussy! He was a small boy, smaller than me, so his arm wasn't very big, but still I thought it was pretty brave of the lad. One day I would find out what was up there inside a girl's pussy. Maybe Amber would show me?

I heard a knock at the door to the corridor, and a voice called out, "Thirty minutes, Mr. Hawk, thirty minutes."

"Um, thanks," I called back. "Does that mean I need to do something? Only I'm not ready yet."

I opened the door, and there was a man wearing a headset and carrying a clipboard standing in front of me. "Oh no, Mr. Hawk," he said. "It's just to let you know how much time you have before you begin filming."

"Oh, ok. Thanks," I said as he continued down the corridor, knocking on other dressing room doors.

I went back to my football match. Ghana has some really good football clubs, but that's not who were playing. Our team from Preston Primary could have beaten either of these clubs.

There was another knock at my door. It was Sebastian, dressed again in short shorts, this time denim cut-offs, black high-top canvas trainers with no socks, and a dull blue t-shirt. He was not wearing his glasses.

"Trevor Boy! This fifteen minutes pass already since kiss. Pass time for us meet here. Must not be late! Why still wearing sexy white clothes and not costume?"

I explained to him about the mix-up, and he seemed to calm down. Everyone was so concerned for me! He grabbed the green satin undies and knelt in front of me. "Here Trevor Boy. Should start. No need for wait to undress."

He rubbed my bare legs, drinking in the look he loved on boys, short shorts and tube socks. I wondered if he had a fetish for these socks. He certainly had a lot of them in his closet. He looked up and grinned at me as he lowered the white satin shorts.

"No Trevor Boy. Is not time right before shoot scene!"

I couldn't help it! I loved the feel of Sebastian's satin shorts on my cock, and his face was right in front of it. Of course I had a stiffy. I grinned back at him and took off the jacket, and we both knew he was going to do it anyway, so he just started attacking my cock with his mouth. We both felt we needed this urgently. We couldn't wait till we got to the set. I was lost in moaning, and Sebastian sounded like a starving man who had just stumbled upon a Christmas turkey. Then there was yet another knock at my door.

I called for the person to come in, and Sebastian didn't stop. In rushed the very gayest man I had ever met. "Oh I'm so glad I caught you! I've been frantic for the last ten minutes. Maybe I should say I was frenetic?" He chuckled with a loud snort.

"Oh please don't stop on my account boys. Do carry on. I just love you boys. You make the best pornography! Do you know why? Do ya? Huh? It's because you love it so much! I mean look at this little guy, sucking like crazy, not because it looks good but because he loves it, loves it, loves it! And because he wants to make you feel good. Doesn't that feel good hunny? Real good?

"Yeah, I bet it feels great because he looks like he knows what he's doing. And you boys have so much energy! It's like everything you do in your movies seems so fresh and new to you, like you're making discoveries, and you are all just full of surprises! And you're not afraid to smile when you've discovered something that feels good! Have you seen the men here? I mean, have you seen them? Have you? Hmm? They look bored or angry when they fuck. Bored or angry. That's all. You boys look happy! And playful! It makes me want to have sex with you so much! When I watch boy videos, I just want to jump in the screen and tickle your little balls!

"So which one of you is Trevor?" I raised my hand, not feeling ready to speak yet because I was very near my boygasm.

"I've heard so much about you, and it's so nice to meet you! And it's all true. You're just the perfect vision of boy loveliness, just lovely. And beautiful. Beautiful too. You have so much beauty! And gorgeous! Can I say you have so much gorge? Never mind that. And you are so very, very sexy! Oh I could eat you up!"

The man was speaking so fast it was hard to follow him, but then I realized it didn't really matter. He didn't say anything important. "Oh sensational! Is this what you were wearing before… before…" He pointed to Sebastian and held up the white jacket and shorts. "Oh and you didn't wear a shirt underneath, and with tube socks? You must have been so sexy in this. Were you sexy? Was he sexy? Oh don't stop for me. Let me just get this on you."

He put my school cap on my head. "Oh! Did I tell you? I didn't tell you, did I? My name is Chauncy, and I work in the costume shop here, and I get to see so many cute costumes for you littles, but I usually don't get to see you boys wearing them until the production is finished, and I have to watch the viedo at home and wank just like everybody else, but you are going to be such a sexy little cutie in this outfit. Now if I could just get your arm in here, good, now your other arm. We don't have to stop anything. You do have your own undies, right? You brought your own? Did you?" Sebastian held up the green satin undies without pausing, and Chauncy gasped in an overly dramatic way. "Oh my! Those are going to look so sexy on you! I just have to see them on you!"

I was starting to get frustrated because of Chauncy's rapid-fire nonsense. He carefully buttoned up my shirt from behind and turned up my collar so he could put my tie on. His carrying on made Sebastian's amazing blowjob feel somehow less amazing. I think maybe Sebastian was feeling the same thing. It might have been just me, but he seemed to be putting less energy into it since Chauncy arrived.

"So have you ever been to Dingwall? St. Felix is in Dingwall, do you know where that is? Have you been there sweetie? It's in the highlands, near Inverness. Near Aberdeen. More near Inverness. Of course you know where Inverness is, don't you hun?" He said all this as he tied my necktie.

"Don't stop what you're doing for me, but could you help out with the shoes, since you're down there? Could you untie them for me hun? That would be a real help. Trevor sweetie, if you could just kick those off. Now the socks, hun? Can you get those pulled down? Oh I bet he has soft skin on those legs. Does he have soft skin? Does he hun? Those long tube socks are good for taking off slowly, very very slowly, feel the leg going all the way down. It can be so sensual." He let out a sigh and resumed.

"There, now doesn't that look just lovely, you little pumpkin!" He had just finished my tie and was straightening my collar. Next, he quickly put my jacket on and buttoned it. "You wanna do the socks and shoes first so he can keep going on your little blowjob? Do you sweetie?" He knelt on the floor behind me and had me hold tight to Sebastian's head to steady myself while he held my leg up to put on my sock with the school emblem, which he did very slowly, and with a lot of fuss and adjustment.

"Oh his skin is so soft hun, don't you think?" While he had my leg lifted, he put the shoe on as well. "Ok now, other leg, sweetie. You know these are wool socks. Wool socks are the best. They are so good in so many ways. Short trousers in schoolboy uniforms used to be made of wool. They were all wool. No fiber blends, just wool. These are just Polyester. These are cotton. They are a cotton poly blend. A bit cheaper, but they look so cute on-screen. They look so sexy. So cute and sexy. But you know what? You could wear the wool shorts in the coldest weather and not feel cold. Well of course you feel cold, but not very cold. I mean your knees would get cold, of course, but you've got such cute little knees!

"Oh how I wish I could do a scene with you! We should set that up. Do you think so? I've done a lot of work on-camera, and I think you'd love what I can do with your little bottom on-camera. Boys usually do. They do like the things I do with their bottoms."

The blowjob still felt nice, but nothing more than… just nice, and Sebastian certainly seemed to have lost some of the joy in giving me my blowjob with this annoying man's chattering away and interrupting him for help.

"I'm so sorry sweetie, but it's shorts and undies time. Are you about to cum, sweetie? I can wait just a minute or two if you like so you can cum, but we should try to stay on schedule. You're not due on the set for another… seven minutes now. Should I wait for you to cum with your cute little cock? Do you what me to wait a minute sweetie? I bet you look super-cute and sexy when you cum. Do you look really super-cute when you cum, sweetie?

"I could help if you like, sweetie. I can help. I could kiss you or tickle your balls if that would help. Would that help, sweetie? Or I could lick your little hole, or stick a finger up your ass and play with your little prostate. Would that feel good, sweetie? Huh? Would that help you cum? Would you like that, sweetie? Should I help you cum?" Those felt like nasty suggestions to me.

That was weird; he wasn't unattractive for a man. In all my fantasies, and in the massive amount of sex play I'd done over the past two days, all I was interested in was a person's body, not how much they talked or anything. Despite all the love I'd gotten from Randy and the boys in the past two days, it had never occurred to me that my feelings toward someone could change how I felt about having sex with them. I thought about this the rest of the day. What if I had to do a scene with someone who annoyed me? Would I be able to do it? Was there some rule about that at Frenetic?

I decided it was time to end Sebastian's blowjob and finish getting dressed for the scene. I gently pulled out of Sebastian's mouth. He stood up grinning at me, and to my great surprise, he gave Chauncy his lovely Sebastian smile and a kiss on the lips! "Nice for seeing you Chauncy Man," he said.

"Oh you're such a little sweetie!" said Chauncy, blushing at Sebastian.

Then Sebastian turned and kissed me very sweetly, taking his time. He handed the green satin bikini undies to Chauncy, who knelt in front of me and helped me, unnecessarily, to lift my leg and step into the right leg opening. He seemed to caress my leg as much as he could while still appearing to do his job.

"Good, now the left one, Sweetie," he said, taking gentle hold of my left leg and repeating the process. He pulled them up, giving my limp cock a quick goodbye kiss. "Oh my! Oh my oh my oh my!" he said as he very carefully adjusted the undies.

He lifted the bottom of my shirt above my belly and said, "Hold that there for just a sec, would you please, Sweetie?"

I didn't know why he wanted me to do that, but it was soon clear. He gasped heavily and ran his hands around my midriff, caressing my skin and the thin waistband of the undies, saying, "Oh my god you are so sexy in these! Can you see how sexy these look on you? Can you, sweetie? Look in the mirror. Your director is going to love you for this! He might want to shag you himself! I certainly do, but heavens we haven't got time for that." He inhaled deeply and let out a heavy sigh.

"No time. That's so sad. Don't you think it's sad, hun?" he asked Sebastian, though he didn't leave time for a response. He ran his hand over my cock and said, "This satin is so luxurious! Does it make you want to have a stiffie just wearing them? Are you getting a stiffie, Sweetie? But we must press on! We are almost out of time. You have to be on the set fifteen minutes before your shoot is scheduled to begin, and it's nearly that now. It's good that you're on stage two. That's right, isn't it, Sweetie? Stage two? St. Felix Academy? Oh! Silly me! Of course it's St. Felix Academy! The cute uniform with the tiny little shorts, of course! And the debut film appearance of our new star! You!"

He repeated the touchy-feely process as he put my shorts on. Then he tucked my shirt in neatly before doing up the button and the zip. He looped the belt around my waist and said, "You probably want to do the buckle yourself so they're nice and comfortable, huh? Would you rather do the buckle yourself, Sweetie?"

I didn't say anything, but I did up the buckle. He fussed over my costume a few seconds more, sparing no opportunity to touch my skin, my face, and mostly my bare legs. For the first time, this didn't turn me on.

He stood up, then bent over and gave me a quick peck on the lips. "Bye Sweetie," he said as he turned to leave. "It was so nice meeting you! I'm sure we'll be seeing a lot more of each other!" The thought of that brought me very little joy.

Chapter 14
Set

"I want that one!"

Before each scene, actors choose their FSP's. Some, like Malcolm, have already chosen their FSP's ahead of time, but many of us just like to see who's available. The fluff area is a wild place before filming begins. I would do more fluff work if I wasn't so busy all the time.

12:45 PM, Tuesday, July 17

Sebastian and I slowly walked farther down the same corridor where our dressing rooms were. I wanted to talk to him about Chauncy, the irritating man from the wardrobe department.

"Why were you in such a hurry to kiss Chauncy?" I asked. "You told him nice things too. Didn't you find him annoying?"

"Oh Trevor Boy must much learn still," he replied. "Chauncy very nice man. Have problem for talk too much, make hard for concentrate sometime on blowjob. Trevor Boy need remember love first. Talk too much make annoy, of course, but love most important. Have good heart, Chauncy. Also, give excellent blowjob and fuck. You find out one time. When cock in his mouth, not talk for too much. Do many scene with boy, also with man. But always love is first before annoy. Love first important always."

I felt a little embarrassed when he explained it to me. All I felt was annoyed, irritated, and frustrated and I forgot the first and most important rule at Frenetic, to love everybody.

Soon we came to a door marked 'Stage 2' on the right side of that corridor, not even halfway to the end. We turned to each other to say goodbye, and it felt so strange seeing him in such boring clothes. Still, he had those bare sexy legs.

"Bye bye Trevor Boy," he said. "Have good luck for scene today. Have in mind always energy, but most have love. And try for remember lines too, he said as he handed me my script, which I had forgotten in my dressing room. With another super-sweet Sebastian kiss, he left for Stage 5, and I opened the door to Stage 2.

***

"Here he is, in good time," said Randy as he kissed me in the doorway. "First things first. You need to select an FSP."

He took my hand and walked me over to the fluff area, where several people of all shapes, ages, and sizes lined up, but Robbie wasn't there this time. Each of them wore a nice smile, and they all looked eager. "Word got round," said Randy, "that the incredibly sexy new boy was going to be in this scene, and everybody wants to fluff for you."

I was flattered, but I still didn't understand. I'd seen myself in the mirror at the party at Cockerel Manor the previous evening, and I thought I really did look sexy, but I wasn't any sexier than Robbie, Boris, or Sebastian. I was just regular sexy.

Then another face appeared in the crowd as he stood up. It was him! It was Annie! I dashed up to him and kissed him. It was a longer kiss than I'd expected, and before we'd finished, Randy said "Ok, I think that's settled. The rest of you can go now. There is still time to pick up work on some of the other stages, and remember, they also need a hand in the Adult Division. You kids are really popular there."

"Fifteen minutes," I heard Judine call out. "That's fifteen minutes people."

All around the room, I could hear various people calling out, "Fifteen minutes, thank you."

"You're an actor now, Trevor, and you are supposed to respond too," Annie said. "When the stage manager calls out how much time you have before they begin shooting, all actors and certain members of the crew are supposed to repeat 'fifteen minutes'. That way they know you heard them. It's also customary to add 'thank you.' No, it's not necessary now," he said as I turned my head to call out my response. "But you should get in the habit. The next call will be at five minutes, and the final call will be at places. If you are on the set early enough, they will also call thirty minutes."

"Oh, someone knocked at my dressing room to tell me that," I told him. Then I hesitated nervously and asked, "You really can be my FSP, right? I mean, you're not working for someone else, are you?"

"Yes, I can, you gorgeous boy," he said with a smile that made me feel like I was melting. "You're the reason I came here."

I had so many feelings when he said that, I wanted to cry and laugh and hug him and kiss him. I settled for another kiss. We found a couple of chairs and sat down. I could not believe how pretty he was, and he was completely naked for me except for the red key around his neck for his FSP locker. I didn't know if I ever would understand what attracted me so strongly to him.

"I did a scene this morning with a man and a girl," he said, "but I had nothing scheduled for the afternoon, so I came here."

"Was it fun, your scene?" I asked him.

"Oh yes, it was fun. They are always fun! The man was a real sweetie, very gentle, and the girl was cute, but a little shy, which made her seem cuter," he said. "She's still very new to child porn. I think confidence is sexy, very sexy, but when someone feels a bit shy about a scene, sometimes that makes it more thrilling, and kids our age, littles, always show their excitement brilliantly.

"She was only shy until we began. Then she was an animal! Teenagers and adults seem to act a little less excited when they do scenes, and they are almost never shy because they've usually been doing unusual scenes with unusual people for years."

"I think I know what you mean," I said. "You're not the first person who's told me about that. I guess right now I'm an excited little, and I think I was pretty shy yesterday, but then I felt better after we did a few takes. I hope I'll always have new things to try. I don't think I'll ever get bored. I can't imagine!"

He leaned over and kissed me. Then he stepped in front of me with a very seductive grin and asked, "So, is there anything your FSP can do for you before the scene gets started?"

I smiled at him and hugged him around his waist, groping his ass. "Is it ok if I say I love you, Annie?"

"Of course it is, silly boy! I love you too! Most people here tell each other they love them all the time, and the great thing about it is that they always mean it," he said. "You should know by now that love is the most important thing here."

"Well," I said unsteadily, "then, I love you Annie."

I felt so scared when I told him that. I really loved Robbie, and especially Boris and Sebastian, but when I thought about loving Annie, it was different. Those three boys were so sweet, they made me feel very happy, and after only two days, I couldn't imagine life without them. They'd all helped me so much, and they'd always tried to make me as happy as I could be. I tried to make them happy too because it was important to me. When Sebastian told me about all the work he had lost because new boys said they could do extreme bottoming but really they couldn't, it made me sad. I think all those things meant that I loved them.

Annie was different. I wanted to be with him so much it hurt. Even when I was with him sometimes, when I wasn't busy feeling like I was in heaven, it hurt because I felt such strong feelings for him that I didn't think I could stand it if something happened and I couldn't see him anymore, or even for a little while. It was very painful just having a simple thought like that. I felt all of the same feelings for him that I felt for the boys, but I also felt these much stronger feelings for him.

He was so sweet and impossibly pretty. His voice was like a beautiful song. His skin was softer than chinchilla fur. His eyes were like oil paintings, and I got lost in them. His hair was… like it was messy, but in a way that looked really cute, and it was very soft. Most of all, he was really a boy. He just liked to play dress-up, so I liked that. He liked football and everything. He told me about a trick in football called an offside trap. I didn't really understand it, even though I really liked football, but it reminded that he was real a boy.

"Annie, should I call you a her or a him?" I asked nervously, looking up at him. "I mean, I know you're a boy, right?" I gave his willy a quick tug. "But what should I call you?"

"Oh thanks for asking, you sweet boy!" he said as his willy stood up to thank me for the attention. He gave me a big sloppy kiss. "Nobody ever asks me that. I said yesterday that I was a boy, and I like to be pretty. I like to be called him, all the boy words, but it's ok if people call me her, and you can call me anything you like, you sweet bundle of love! And I do love you sweetie, really I do!"

I blushed as he drenched me in another round of wet kisses. When he finished, he wiped my face dry with one of his hand towels. "So, if you're a boy, why are you called Annie? I mean, that's not your real name, is it?

"No, that's my working name, and it's become the name I use all the time now. I was named Angus when I was born. My parents are lovely people, and they love me a lot, but they chose a name for me that never seemed to suit me very well. I like boy names like Devon and Kevin and… and Trevor," he said softly. I felt tingly at the sound of my name being spoken like that. "Your name sounds soft and lovely when you say it out loud. Angus sounds harsh, like something you'd shout over the garden fence when your neighbor has the music up too loud."

"I think Angus is a lovely name because it means you," I said. He blushed, but I carried on, "But Randy says everybody should be able to choose who they are, and you choose to be Annie, and you're a boy. You are the loveliest boy I've ever met too." I hugged him around the waist and made a farting sound on his belly.

1:00 PM, Tuesday, July 17

"Five minutes, thank you," I called to Judine as Adrian approached.

"You'd better get to work, Trevor," said Annie after kissing me one last time before turning to go to the fluff area. "You know where to find me, luv."

"She's a pretty bird," said Adrian. "I asked her to fluff for me, but she said she was waiting for you. I think she fancies you, mate."

"Yeah," I said, not wanting to tell him anything about my feelings for Annie. "I think you should know he's a boy, not a tranny girl, and he likes to be called him," I told Adrian.

"Blimey Trevor, I can't keep these trannies straight. Most of them want to be called girls because that's who they feel they are, so I just call them that until I'm told different. She never said anything to me before." I lowered my head slightly and gazed at him until he corrected himself, "Er, right, he never said anything about it before."

"He says it's ok if people say 'her', only he'd rather be called a him," I clarified. "I think he understands about the tranny girls, and of course it's proper to call them girls always. I think that's why he never says anything when someone gets it wrong with him. What it is, he really is a boy, but he likes to play dress-up. Sort of. He told me that girls have all the nice clothes and things to make them pretty, and he likes to be pretty."

"That's a lot to remember Trev," said Adrian. "By the way, what's this I hear about a new working name for you?"

I smiled as I told him about how Boris got confused with my name. "So I told Randy I wanted to be called Hawk Boy. Do you like it?"

Adrian wrinkled his forehead as he thought about it. "I dunno mate. It's not like a proper name, but it's not like a porn name either. It sounds like you're a superhero or something. Do you want to act like you're saving people and all that in your work?"

"I dunno. Maybe Trevor Boyhawk or Trevor Hawk would be better," I said. "That's what's written on my dressing room door, Trevor Hawk, and I think Randy prefers it."

"I think Trevor Hawk sounds cool. It makes you sound like you're sharp, like you're a bit wild, and very cool. You don't really need 'Boy' in your name because you're name is Trevor. That's already a boy name. Besides, you don't want to be called 'Boy' when you're grown up and working as an adult, do you?"

That gave me something more to think about. I wouldn't have a name that Boris gave me, but I would be sharp, wild, and cool–I liked the sound of that. I thought hawks looked graceful and majestic when they flew. I liked that to. I wanted people to think of me as graceful and majestic. That's what I thought about Annie, graceful and majestic. Very, very graceful…

"Wardrobe and makeup, final checks please, wardrobe and makeup," called Judine. Diane, the creepy Asian wardrobe assistant, fussed over my clothes much more than was necessary. She said she needed to check the seams inside my shorts as she ran her hands up under the leg openings. I could hear her gasp when she felt my satin bikini undies.

She caressed me all around my undies, giving off soft moans, and said, "These sexy briefs might be a problem with the director. It's not standard for boarding school boys, but he has turned this into a pretty sexy boarding school."

"Oh no," I complained. "Do I have to change them?" I was looking forward to being extra sexy for the camera today.

"We'll see. He never likes to see the kids' undies before the shoot," she replied. "He loves the surprise, and he thinks it helps the actors to react spontaneously. I do so want to see you in these," she moaned, rubbing over my cock, which was not becoming erect for her.

While Diane was busy with that, and I'm sure my face was squirming, Adrian raised his eyebrows asked me, "What have you got in there for me, mate? Sounds interesting."

I gave him a wink as I tried to ignore Diane, who was still fussing unnecessarily over my clothes. "Are you ready for the scene?" he asked. "You're getting fucked by Jeanine I see."

"Yeah, I've gone over the script loads of times now." I told him how disappointed I felt to learn that I was originally supposed to be fucked by Malcolm and his big cock. He wasn't exactly sympathetic.

"Rules are rules, mate. You've got to see the specialist first," he reminded me unnecessarily. "But seriously Trevor, I'm sorry, and yeah, I love doing scenes with Malcolm. He's a sweetheart, but he's powerful. He'll give you a right proper rogering soon enough, you'll see."

"At least I don't have to slap you or choke you with your tie today," I sighed. He thought this was funny. He had a fit of the giggles that went on far too long.

"Trevor, I love you mate!" He kissed me without stopping his giggling first. "You really are a sweet boy. You want everyone to be happy and ok or whatever. But really, that's nothing. Can I show you what I mean?"

Was he going to slap me? Well, if he did, it's fair play after yesterday. I nodded, and he did slap me. It made a loud cracking sound too. I felt a sting, but it didn't seem to hurt very much really. I rubbed my cheek and looked at him curiously.

"Does your mum slap you when she gets a bit cross with you sometimes?" he asked me.

"Loads of times," I said, adding several large nods. "And I hate it. It hurts!"

"No it doesn't," he said with a grin. "Well, maybe a bit, but not very much." He took me to a makeup table in the studio and told me to sit in front of the mirror. "Look here," he said, pointing at my reflection. I could see a great red mark on my left cheek. "Did you know I slapped you hard enough to leave a mark like that?"

"Actually, no," I said. How did he do that? How did he make my face red without it hurting like when Mum slaps me, even when she doesn't make my face red?

"I'll tell you a trade secret. You need to remember two things," said Adrian. "When someone hits us in our face, it's personal. We feel it more because it's like we live in our face. Know what I mean? We react more strongly. Some of the hurt comes from what we expect to feel when we are hit in such a personal area. But you knew ahead of time when I slapped you just now. In a way, you invited me to come into your face and slap you, as a sort of experiment. You didn't have an automatic reaction." I nodded. I wasn't sure I believed him, but he was older, and he'd been doing this work for a long time. "That's the first thing. When you slap me during a scene, I've already invited you into my personal space to do it."

I thought about this as the gray haired Scotsman hurried over to dab some makeup onto my red cheek. "The second thing you need to remember is that no one's disappointed or upset or anything. I wasn't angry with you when I slapped you, and I'm not your mum. When your mum slaps your face, she is probably shouting because you've done something wrong. You've disappointed her, or you've failed at something–I don't know what gets your mum wound up.

"I feel hurt when I know I've disappointed my mum, and sometimes I'm frightened because I'm sure some terrible punishment will follow. When you feel so many bad things already, and then your mum raises her hand to slap you, most of the hurt is already in your head. It's emotions, not your stinging cheek. It's all the things that your stinging cheek means, mate. Most of the hurt comes from the reason you've been slapped, not the actual slap itself. Do you see what I mean?"

I tilted my head and thought, which seemed to annoy the makeup man. "Look at it this way mate," he said to me. "I slapped you pretty hard just now. Do you feel like you want to cry?" I shook my head, which seemed to annoy the makeup man again.

"You didn't cry at all, did you? You didn't even think about crying. That's because you were paying attention to how your skin felt, not all that other rot that goes with having your face slapped by your mum. What I just did to you is what a slap in the face really feels like, and I slapped you bloody hard too. But it's really not so bad, is it?"

"No, I guess it's not really bad at all. It stung, but that went away right away," I said with surprise.

"So, Trevor, would you do a scene that had me taking a slap at you?" he asked.

"Sure I would," I replied.

"Ok, then would you want me to give you a light pussy slap that would look stupid, or would you want me to do it properly?"

"Properly, of course," I said.

"And if I gave you a nice, sharp slap to the face, would you be angry with me? Would your feelings be hurt? Would you not want to be friends? Would you not want to work with me anymore?

"Of course not!" I said, and I understood. I could slap my own face quite hard, and it really didn't hurt. He was right. It's not what I feel on my cheek that really hurts.

"Great! You don't have to slap me today, but the script says you need to knock me about some. I think you know better now. I think you know not to hesitate, and not to do any of that pussy fag-boy shit. I think you know what it means to do it properly now." He leaned over to kiss me. I had to turn in my chair to face him.

"Look laddy," said the makeup man, "do you want your face to look lopsided in the scene? I'm almost done here. Can you let a man do his work?" I don't think he was in the mood for a couple of giggling boys just then.

"The school here is on summer holidays, but when we start lessons again, you will study S and S, that's Sex and Stagecraft. They teach things like this in those lessons, but since you started in the summer, you've had no S and S, and no acting lessons. They want me to help you with all that, like acting by the Method. I think you'll pick it up no problem. You seemed to learn really fast yesterday, but the bloody director had to keep pushing. Bloody combat in your first bloody scene, the prat!"

***

How much more new information could I take in? I knew they had a school in the studio complex, but I thought it was just for the kids in residence. I thought I'd be going back to Preston Primary. The idea of attending lessons at the studio seemed wonderful to me! I understood the kids here. They all seemed to be my friends, or they wanted to be my friends. I didn't really fancy going back to Preston. I never felt like I fit in there. I never understood why I couldn't just ask a boy to be my friend, and he could say yes or no. I could do that with boys when I was six, but no more. I could also do that with girls, and I had more friends who were girls than boys.

I don't think I ever understood what it meant to be a boy. Mum told me that boys act like my stupid brother Ian, and girls play with dolls, and they play mums and dads. I think American kids call it playing house. That wasn't very helpful, and it wasn't true either. I played dolls with some of my girl friends, and mums and dads sometimes they let me be the mum if one of them wanted to be a dad, and I also liked to play football with the boys. I wasn't very good though, but after the game it seemed the other boys went their own way, punching each other on the shoulder and other stupid things to show how hard they were.

Why are boys supposed to be hard? I would rather have friends and be nice to them. I want them to be nice to me. I don't like boys who are hard. They are the bullies. They are the ones who think it's important to fight. They introduce themselves like this: "Oy! My name's Nigel, and you don't mess with me or you'll wish you were dead!" Who said I was going to mess with him? Why is it important that I know he would beat me to a bloody pulp if I messed with him?

What does messing with someone even mean? And why would he think I was messing with him if I asked him these perfectly sensible questions? If that's what it means to be a boy, if it means I'm supposed to be an asshole and be mean to people instead of wanting to be nice to them, then no thanks. I'll be something else.

I think that's a large part of what attracted me to child porn. Everything was about love, and being close to each other. We kissed. We felt love. Being loving was what a boy had to do to be popular at Frenetic. Being a hard asshole was a sure way for a boy not to get his contract renewed. Everyone made sure that other people knew they loved them. Boys wanted to be kind and sweet. Even the men were that way.

At the studio, I could ask someone to be my friend, and they would usually smile and say yes. They wouldn't tell me how hard they were, or that I'd better not mess with them. It was a safe and wonderful place for me to be Trevor, or Hawk Boy, or whatever, and nobody would have a problem with that. They didn't like boys who were hard, though they needed boys like Adrian and Malcolm who could act hard in their films.

Boris was another one of those boys. A few months after the events in this story, I fluffed for him during one scene where he played a bully, and I didn't do a very good job of it. It hurt to see such a sweet boy that I loved acting that way. It was too real, and he had to reassure me during fluff calls that he was acting. That's not how a fluff boy is supposed to act, but Boris would never complain about me, and he told me afterward many times that I was still his favorite fluff boy.

Chapter 15
Scene

The girls are kissing while holding in their splits position as Malcolm tumbles in. I'm looking on from our position on the walkway above, and Adrian is tending to me. That's Roy, the camera operator, on the right. You can see Diane from the wardrobe department and the Scottish makeup man to the right of the fluff staff. That's our stage manager Judine and our director, Mr. Koolman, next to her with the weird hair and beard. We're just getting started with scene 4a.

1:05 PM, Tuesday, July 17

"Places everybody, we are at places for scene 4a please!" called Judine.

"Places, thank you," I responded, a call that was echoed around the set.

"FSP's to the fluff area, sound and lights final check, wardrobe and makeup clear the set, cameras ready, and quiet on the set please!"

For this scene, the set was done up as a gymnasium, with all sorts of gymnastics equipment. The older kids would be doing their action in the middle of the gym, but Adrian and I would be watching from a walkway above. Judine had warned us that we would be doing several takes of each part of this scene in order to get the best angles from the handheld cameras, the remote ceiling cameras, the crane camera, and the large studio cameras, one of which was again on rails, only this time the track was much longer. T

he main concern was that they couldn't have cameras in the shot, so they needed to clear several cameras from the set every time they wanted to film from a different angle. The girls, Claire and Jeanine, had even more work, or fun, depending on how you look at it. They had to do a few extra takes while Roy, the remote camera operator, filmed them from the walkway where we were watching. Then he needed to film them with Adrian and me watching, with Roy filming over our shoulders. I don't think the girls had any problems though.

"Ok, I want this to be lively people. Make me feel energetic and excited! This is a playful moment for Claire and Jeanine, all right?"

Mr. Koolman, the director, always told us actors exactly what he wanted, and he helped quite a lot. Nobody wanted to disappoint him. "Boys," he said, turning to Adrian and me, "I want curiosity and wonder, then I want horny. And Trevor, remember, you need to be rough with Adrian. I want to feel that. Ad lib if you feel something. Ok, roll cameras… and… action!"

Claire and Jeanine bounded from one corner of the gym to the center, doing cartwheels, hand springs, and other really cool gymnastics things. They were wearing their St. Felix girls PE kits, only they were barefoot. In the story, Jeanine wasn't sure if she's really a girl who was born with the wrong parts, so the school is treating her as a girl for the year.

They both ended their tumbling by doing the splits, facing each other. They had some dialog that was hard to hear from where we were, mostly talking about boys and how happy they were to be friends, but they stayed in their splits for a long time. When the dialog was done, they slowly leaned in toward each other for a slow kiss. Well, it started out slow, but it became rather exciting in short order.

They removed each other's t-shirts, Claire's first. Her breasts were so small I couldn't really see them from our vantage, but I'd seen them the day before. They were quite small, only just developing. Then Jeanine's shirt came off slowly, revealing her complete lack of breasts. She was a proper tranny off-camera. She was a girl who was born with boy bits, so of course she had no breasts at all.

I was beginning to see why Boris liked trannies so much. I mean, they were boys, but not really. They were girly and feminine, but they had boys' bodies. I'm not just saying this because I was obsessed with Annie, mind you. I liked Annie because he was so beautiful, and he was so sweet. He made me feel things that no one ever had made me feel before, and part of it was the thrill of not understanding. I know that sounds a bit weird, but I think that was part of it.

Claire leaned back, still in her splits, the two of them still kissing, until she was fully lying on the mat. Jeanine licked her nipples, something I've never liked doing or having done to me, and the two of them finally brought their legs together. After several minutes, Jeanine moved her tongue down Claire's belly, giving her licks and soft kisses along the way, until she reached her very short shorts. Claire arched he back as Jeanine playfully tugged at her waistband, pulling it down a bit, licking along the top line of her knickers, then letting it go while she went back up to Claire's mouth for a kiss.

Jeanine reached under Claire's shorts while they were kissing and rubbed her pussy, which made Claire grunt. Jeanine slowly pulled Claire's shorts off and crawled between Claire's legs. She began what looked like chewing on Claire's pussy through her knickers. She pulled Claire's knickers down just a bit in front and teased her clitoris with her tongue. Then she removed them entirely. I had to watch this very carefully because later in the scene I had to lick Claire's pussy.

***

I've already talked about pussies in this memoir. They frightened me. A fourteen year-old actress named Amber rubbed my cock against her pussy the day before, and it felt nice in a way, but I didn't go in. I was only eight, almost nine, and I didn't have much of a cock to reach into her pussy. I could feel a sort of slimy goo on her pussy, and I wondered where it was coming from. Was it some kind of girl snot? Amber is a dear, but pussies made me nervous. What did they have up inside there? A great big runny nose?

When I saw that in the script this morning, I asked Randy about it. He said "the rest of Claire's body. That's what's up there." He told me I should focus on who she was, and how I was making her feel. "That's what sex is for," he said, "Making each other feel incredible because you love each other."

That was ok and all, but I had never done that before. I didn't know how to make a girl's pussy feel good. "That's why Eastman changed the script, Hawk Boy," said Randy. "You have never eaten pussy, you have never taken it in the ass on camera, and this is your first movie. Since we couldn't keep you with Malcolm in this scene, Eastman thought we could still play the angle of showing you as our newest boy having a huge, new experience by doing things that you've really never done before. Trust me Hawk Boy, he's right."

It sounded as if they wanted to put me in a strange situation and watch me be clumsy and not know what I was doing. "That's the idea," he said. "It looks really cute when a little is still discovering sex for the first time. The clumsiness will be a super turn-on for your audience. It shows innocence, which they love. It shows sincerity, which is hard to find in porn, and the way Claire and Jeanine respond to you will show real love, which you can only get in Frenetic productions."

"But what's inside a girl's pussy?" I asked. "Can't you tell me that at least? Can I get a fluff girl today and have her show me?

"Normally yes, but Mr. Eastman wants this to be your first experience with pussy. He wants you to explore Claire's pussy for the first time on-camera, and if you practice with a fluff girl, you won't look like a naturally curious little boy, which is our angle here. You've had your way with boys in this movie, but this is special. You are out of your element, and we want to capture that.

"It would be easier to have Malcolm fuck you with his big cock, and you could act like it was the first time, but that won't work with pussy. Malcolm is going to be a bit rough with you. He's running the show in this scene, and he will push your head around and tell you what he expects while the camera is rolling. You will both be making up lines as you go. Just be yourself. It's called improvising."

I didn't care what it was called. It still sounded like they wanted me to look like a foolish little boy. "You did see the note that you're getting an extra £1,000 because this is the first time you're eating pussy, right?"

My eyes opened wide. I hadn't seen the note, but there it was in my script. "When you do something on camera, and it's the first time you've done it, you get bonus pay. That's another thing you'd lose if you used a fluff girl for practice. When you get bonus pay, it goes right into your spending account."

That meant it was real money for me to use! Bonuses, fluff pay, and £500 per month were mine to spend on whatever I bloody wanted! I already had £1,000 in Randy's vault, £200 in my money clip, and another £1,000 would make £2,200! I could almost afford Tower Bridge!

"I thought that might ease your worries a bit, kiddo," said Randy.

***

"Cut!" yelled Mr. Koolman. Jeanine had been licking Claire's pussy for several minutes, and that was the time they planned to reset everything and shoot it again from a different angle. "Wonderful girls, that was excellent," he said to Claire and Jeanine, clapping slowly. I could see a hard bulge in the front of Jeanine's shorts. "Roy? Roy, I think we're going to put you on a tripod. You're the best of the best Roy, but we need a tripod for this long shot. It's just one of those things ok?" Roy nodded and gave a thumbs-up. "Camera crew? Camera crew, we need to get a tripod up there to Roy. Just a steady two-axis deal should work, about a meter and a half."

"Ok, that's five, people, take five and then we reset for scene 4a. Take 5," called Judine.

"I'm going down to see Annie," I told Adrian. "I want to see if I can stay down there because they won't be shooting us for some time yet, and I've got to know about pussy!"

"Careful, mate," said Adrian. "You don't want to blow your bonus."

"Nah, I just want to find a closer place to watch this, that's all. Won't you please tell me what it's like Adrian?" I pleaded with him.

"I said no, and there the end to it," he said firmly. "I'm not going to help my new mate spoil his scene. You need to be naive for this to work, and you know it. Oh give us a kiss you little sweetie," he said, seeing that I was moping. He squeezed my ass as we kissed.

"Oh I know, mate," I said.

He gave me a big, gentle hug and said, "You'll thank yourself for letting this happen. Trust me, all right?"

I nodded to him and started down the stairs. I asked Judine if I could watch from somewhere else. "He wants you upstairs so you only see what your character sees. Sorry hunny," she said. I looked to the side, and there was Claire, pulling her knickers up.

"Ooh, but 'ello Trevor," she said with a sweet smile and a wave.

"Hi Claire!" I had to ask. "Any tips for me on doing this scene?"

She waved her finger slowly and said with a sly smile, "Oh, but you are a naughty boy! I cannot 'elp you, and zis I think you already know, but I am very excited to 'ave you to be licking in my pussy today, you cute, cute boy!" She gave me a kiss and a wave, and walked back to Diane, the wardrobe lady, to finish getting dressed.

I sulked off to the fluff area to sit with Annie. Later I felt so stupid. I should have gone to see Annie first. "What can I do for you, sweetie?" he asked with a hug and a kiss.

"Oh I dunno," I said. "It's this pussy thing. I'm nervous. I won't know what to do, and everyone will see me looking stupid."

"Oh I've been looking forward to that one! You are going to look so sweet with the girls," he said. "I'll try not to cum just from watching you, but no promises. I won't use my hands though!" I didn't know if he was kidding, but he hugged me and gave me another kiss. "Trevor, I'm sure people have explained to you why they want you naive, right?"

"Yeah," I said, "loads of times, but I don't want to look stupid, like I don't know what I'm doing in front of everyone! What do girls have in there? The lads at my school said they have another mouth with teeth and everything, but I think they were having me on."

We sat next to each other. He had his arm around me, which felt very nice. "I think I can tell you this much, sweetie," he said. "Girls do not have any teeth in there, or anything that will hurt you. They only have things that feel nice." I nodded, because I believed him. He would never help them to make me look stupid. "But hunny, I think you're forgetting something." I turned to look at him.

"You've told me about climbing the trees and how thrilling it was that you might get caught. Well, think of this the same way. Climb a tree with this scene. Claire can be your tree. If you look a bit silly, that's part of the thrill. It's like getting caught, but in a nice way, like when you were caught by Randy. And there's another safety. You can't do anything wrong! If you do something silly, it turns the audience on even more because they know you're a real boy who is really learning about these things for the first time. Naive new kid scenes are really, really fun, and if you make loads of innocent mistakes, the movie will sell loads more copies! That's part of the reason for the bonus."

"Ok everybody, let's reset for scene 4a, reset for 4a. Wardrobe and makeup, final checks please," called Judine.

Judine's call snapped me out of a brief reverie. I was remembering the thrill of taking that risk, and how amazing it was after Randy really did catch me. I decided to stay and snog with Annie until…

"Places! We are at places please! FSP's to the fluff area, lights and sound final checks, makeup and wardrobe clear the set please, craft services we have a request for more artichoke dip." called Judine.

I pushed Annie back on the fluff mattress and gave his cock a quick suck on the sly before going back upstairs. "Ok Trevor dear, let's move it, we are at places," called Judine as I dashed across the set to get to the stairs.

"Sorry," I called.

***

It took nine takes of scene 4a to get all the camera angles and just the right action from the girls to satisfy the director, and then they had to do it twice more with Adrian and me leaning over the walkway railing to watch them as Roy filmed from behind us. At the end of those last two takes, Adrian and I turned to look into each other's eyes, We said our lines which was me saying his name and him saying "yes Trevor", counted to three in our heads, then slowly moved together and kissed each other like mad. In all eleven takes, Claire came seven times.

Roy took his camera and tripod away while they just filmed Adrian and me standing there from a camera on the gymnastics mat where the girls has been, pretending we were watching them. They filmed us for about ten minutes, with Mr. Koolman calling instructions to us about where we should look and what we should be touching. After that was done Mr. Koolman called it a wrap for scene 4a.

We got a ten-minute break when we finished scene 4a. Claire and Jeanine were sitting together at a small table near craft services. Craft services are the people who set out the food and do basic housekeeping on the set. I sat down with them, and Claire, who was wearing a robe over her otherwise-naked body, pulled it closed tight.

"I 'ave told you Trevor, you naughty boy, zat you will get not even one peek at zis pussy of mine until it is time," she said with a flirtatious grin.

"Oh, I know," I said to her. "I was just wondering something. Do girls always cum so many times? Or are you just different? 'Cause I could never cum that many times so close together."

Claire giggled cutely, but Jeanine accidentally sprayed me with the milk she was drinking. "Oh little Trevor, but you are so precious, mon petit chou!" she said. "But even zis I cannot tell you. I 'ope you do not 'ate me for zis, but you must 'ave for our scene as much surprise to be possible." She let her robe fall open as she wrapped her arms around me and kissed me. Then she quickly pulled her robe closed again and said, "Ah ah ah! No peeking you cute little boy!"

"Wardrobe!" called Jeanine. My jacket, shirt, and tie were spotted with milk.

I stood up and leaned over to kiss Jeanine. "Your turn will be next, my sweet!" I said in a threatening, joking way, brushing some of the milk off my jacket.

I went to the fluff area to spend the rest of the break with Annie. Diane followed me, and I managed to pull my shirt, tie, and jacket off before she reached me, so all I had to do was hand them to her. She appraised my body and winked at me before dropping my clothes in laundry and hurrying up to the costume shop.

"That's her taken care of," I said to Annie.

"You really should be more kind to Diane," he said to me. "She can come on a bit strong, but think about it. She loves your beautiful boy body." I shivered as Annie stroked my chest. "So do I! Is that such a bad thing? Isn't that why we're here, to share our bodies with people who love them?"

"Well, when you put it like that…" Wasn't I ever going to do anything right? Don't they pick kids, special kids who really know how to love everyone, to work here? Am I really the right kind of boy for Frenetic Studios? "I must seem a complete prat," I said, "because I sure feel like one. Of course you're right about Diane, and I should have known right away!"

He hugged me again. There are times when I needed hugs, and times when I needed kisses, and Annie always knew which one I needed.

"Oh stop being such a silly twerp!" he said. "We get loads of new kids here every year, and they always go through this adjustment period, only most kids have a much worse time of it than you're having, and it's only your second day filming! It's not fair you starting during school holidays because you're the only new boy here, but if there were others, you would see how well you're doing." He paused and said, "But you do have a bit of an advantage because everyone is watching out for you, and only you, because you are the only new kid here. Usually we start a whole group of fresh littles together in the fall, and that can be a chaotic time.

"You'll be a great help to them because you'll have just gone through the adjustment yourself. I started with last year's group. Mum signed me up for it because she knew I wouldn't like rugby or dressage, and thought I might like to try it, and oh, it's been wonderful!"

Every time I spoke with anyone, my feelings seemed to be very strong. I was super happy, in a dream world, furious with myself, embarrassed, and in heaven. And Annie thought I was adjusting well?

"Down, you!" I pushed him back onto the mattress again. We were both giggling now. I started to suck his cock, but then I thought about Claire, and I licked Annie's scrotum instead, secretly practicing moves that I might try with my tongue on Claire as I moved down to Annie's ass. He made all kinds of noises and fuss! I wondered if he would help me find some cute, sexy pink clothes.

***

"Five minutes! We're at five minutes people! Wardrobe! Where's Diane? Diane, are you here? We still need Trevor's uniform. Somebody please find Diane," called Judine. Right on cue, Diane entered through the studio door with another complete school uniform on a hanger.

"Sorry Annie," I said," I've got to do this." I got up and met Diane half way. I wrapped my arms around her and kissed her, rubbing my crotch against her leg.

I could hear Annie laughing and clapping. "I love you Trevor!" he called.

Diane got my school uniform sorted in her own sweet time, which suited me. "Oh I just love your soft skin," she said as she helped me into my shirt. S

he had first dropped my shorts a bit in order to tuck my shirt in, pulling them up last, slowly, and rubbing my bikini undies all around as she tucked my shirt in, paying special attention to the front. This time I treated her to a boner, which I pulled upwards in my sexy green satin bikini undies before she did up my zip, giving her a quick peek so she could tug on it. I found that it was easy to forget anything annoying about someone when I was paying attention to how I could make them feel good. Making Diane feel good was much more important than whether or not I was annoyed. I was only a little annoyed to start with, but the happiness I felt when I finally gave her something nice was much greater than that little bit of annoyance. I would try my best to make things better with Chauncy too, and remember to put love and happiness first when I'm bothered by something. I wondered if that attitude would work outside of Frenetic?

"Are we ready Diane? Wardrobe? Are we ready? We need to be at places," called Judine.

"Thirty seconds please." called Diane.

She was finished already, but she fussed a little bit more than necessary with my clothes so she could look into my eyes with a huge smile and say, "Thank you, you sweet little boy!" We kissed, and I ran upstairs, feeling happy that I was starting to understand things. I wondered if anyone outside Frenetic was as loving as the people who worked there?

Chapter 16
Sensational

Scene 4b went very well. Don't I look convincing? It's easy to be convincing when you're not acting. And look at Adrian. I've got him by the head, but he makes it look as if I'm his puppeteer. I learned so much from him when I was new to child porn. I tried my best to be as helpful to other new boys.

***

I returned to the walkway to shoot scene 4b with Adrian. Roy had his camera on his shoulder again, and the tripod had been cleared away. There was another camera hanging on cables from the ceiling and a second camera operator as well. Scene 4b was all about Adrian and me.

The girls had to keep up their play, but they didn't really have much to do, only switching from Jeanine licking Claire's pussy to a 69 sort of position with Jeanine on top. Then Malcolm would tumble his way across the mat to the girls and jump in for a bit, but he would spot Adrian and me watching from above on the walkway, only we weren't just watching.

"Ok, people, we are at places! Places for St. Felix Academy, scene 4b."

"Places," we all replied.

Mr. Koolman stepped out onto the gym mat and stood over the girls and said, "Ok, here's how I want to do this. I'm going to call action before rolling the cameras. I want the transition to look organic, ok? Jeanine, that means you start licking Claire's pussy, and boys," he called to us on the walkway, "you start kissing, and don't stop until you have a ten count from when I call to roll cameras. Are we all clear on that? Girls?" They both said yes.

"Boys? You are the focus for this segment, so you must get the timing right. Do you understand what I want here?"

I didn't understand. I still felt nervous, and it was difficult to follow things being nervous. "Do you understand everything, Trevor?" Adrian asked me. "It's important that you say no if you don't." I looked at him, and I'm sure there was some anxiousness in my eyes. I shook my head slowly.

"I understand, Sir," said Adrian. "Please, can I have two minutes to go over it with Trevor?"

"Certainly, Adrian," he said. "You've been doing a fantastic job of coaching Trevor, a fantastic job. Take what time you need, and we'll hold until you're ready."

"Ok, everybody, we're on hold, please. Everyone hold at places for a few minutes," called Judine.

The call of "hold places" echoed around the set. I didn't know if it counted as holding her position, but Jeanine started licking Claire's pussy anyway. It couldn't have been that bad if she did it when she didn't have to.

Now everybody had to hold everything because of me! How embarrassing. There were so many ups and downs in this child porn business.

Adrian always knew when I was getting nervous and stressed, and he always knew how to settle me. He smiled at me with those lovely eyes of his and kissed me, long and slow. Was this why everyone was holding? So we could kiss? Well. It felt really good. Then I became aware once again of the love. I simply enjoyed the kiss.

"You're getting it, Trevor!" he said when we finished the kiss. "Everybody loves you! And everybody would be happy to wait an hour while we kissed if that's what you need, all right mate?"

I nodded, deciding that I didn't have to know why they were treating me so well anymore. Did I?

"It's simple, mate. He calls for action, and we start snogging, right? And remember, you're in charge. Be rough with me during this scene. Grab my hair and give it a yank if it feels right, none of that nice, pussy-boy who's afraid he might hurt someone rot. Don't give it a try. Do it, and do it hard. You've got to mean it if you do it. Got it?"

"Yeah," I said, wondering what I'd have to do with his cap if I pulled his hair.

He continued, "Then Koolman calls to roll cameras, but that doesn't matter to us. We just carry on snogging. I will count to ten, and then I'll turn my head away. When I do, that's your cue to push my head down. So, on action, we snog. Roll cameras, we keep snogging. When I turn my head away from the kiss, you shove my head down, and hard. Got it?"

"So it's really just us snogging until you turn away, then I shove you down?"

"You've got it, mate!" He gave me another slow, patient kiss. I think that was mostly to show me that people didn't mind waiting for the new boy, and I appreciated it.

"Right, we're ready upstairs," he called to Mr. Koolman, our director. Jeanine was still eating Claire's pussy aggressively, and Claire was becoming excited.

"Thank you, boys," called Mr. Koolman. "Quiet on the set. Quiet, please. And… action!"

Trevor looked into my eyes seriously and said, "I love you, Trevor, you're so sweet." Then we kissed passionately.

I knew he wasn't lying when he said that. So many people say it, and it is always the truth in the studio. When you really love the person you're kissing, it's a different kind of kissing than when you kiss your old aunt Martha or your creepy uncle Eugene. Everything else disappears, and you only really feel the other person's mouth, which seems to carry the love back and forth, somehow. I've never quite worked that one out, but that's how it feels to me. It's like I have my own mouth, and his tongue is my guest, but we only have one set of lips that we share.

Adrian's lips pulled away from mine, bringing me back into my surroundings. I hadn't heard Mr. Koolman's call to roll cameras. It didn't feel like enough time had passed, but I trusted Adrian. It was time to act.

I put my hand on top of Adrian's head, worked up my strongest, most aggressive face, and pushed his head down until he was on his knees. Then I pulled his face into the bulge in my shorts. He looked up at me and nodded. He opened my belt and shorts, seeing my sexy satin bikini knickers for the first time, and he felt my cock through the sexy satin. I got hard right away. I had been so horny that entire day, and I kept missing the chance to cum. There was my wake-up blowjob, there was playing with Sebastian in the car, and Sebastian's blowjob was in my dressing room. No happy ending to any of them! I was afraid I would cum right away once Adrian began sucking me off properly.

Luckily, the scene needed that. Malcolm's cue to discover Adrian and me was the noise I made when I came, and if I came early, we could use it just the same. There were four cameras used to film Adrian and me on the walkway, the two hand-held cams, the hanging cam, and one more on the floor on the opposite side of the gym for long shots.

I remembered being in the limousine as Markus was sucking my cock, and all those hands were rubbing champagne all over me. My body was the world's. I was giving it to them, and they wanted it. All these cameras filming my body having sex was the same thing, really. Instead of using their hands to take the gift I offered with my body, they were receiving it through the cameras. I began to feel as though I loved the cameras because they were what carried my love to the people watching.

I unfastened the bottom buttons of my shirt as Adrian lowered my shorts. I kept my eye on the girls because I was supposed to be careless with Adrian, but I heard him gasp as he saw my sexy green satin bikini undies in full for the first time. I put my left arm around my back to hold the bottom of my shirt and jacket away from Adrian's head. He munched on my boner through my sexy satin knickers while his fingers explored my ass.

The girls changed to their 69 position, which was Adrian's cue to begin the process of pulling my undies down. I call it a process because they don't want us just to pull underpants down. There is a lot of teasing first, then pulling it partway down, showing only the ass and the base of the cock, then licking and playing all around some more, then pulling the front down just enough to set the cock free. That's when the proper blowjob can begin.

Still, you don't get to pull the undies off for a few minutes. It keeps the viewers in suspense, and it drives me mad waiting for the mouth on my cock! I know that I've always shown that feeling while I'm waiting, and for some reason, the directors love it. They've told me it makes the viewers relate to me. They are being teased, and so am I. If they feel more like me, it makes the whole experience more real when they wank to one of my movies.

Finally, there it was. Adrian had my cock in his mouth, and it felt good! I breathed harder, but I couldn't cum until my underpants were around my ankles or on the floor. A few minutes later, Malcolm came tumbling naked onto the mat toward the girls. He was quite talented as a gymnast. That was Adrian's cue to finish lowering my undies. I still didn't want to cum, though.

The director had asked me to wait if I could until Malcolm was in position. After some dialog between Malcolm and Claire, the girls changed positions, so Jeanine was once again eating Claire's pussy, though from a different angle, and Malcolm straddled Claire's face and slid his big cock into her open mouth. He had his head facing Jeanine so he could watch carefully as she worked on Claire's pussy. Malcolm face-fucked Claire rather aggressively for a few minutes.

Meanwhile, Adrian seemed to sense that I was near to cumming. Everything was ready now. My sexy green satin knickers were around my ankles, and Malcolm was in place. Adrian sucked harder and faster, poking his finger around my hole but not going in. That was enough to do it, though. Roy's camera was less than one foot from my face, and the other bloke's camera was less than a foot from my cock when I let out a high-pitched howl, not a very long one, but a loud one, almost a bark. My reflexes pulled my hips back, away from Adrian, but he had his hands around my ass to hold us together. He knew what it meant to be ready.

Malcolm looked up when I made my sound. He didn't pause fucking Claire's face, though. I was shivering and shaking with thrusts of electricity as Adrian tried to hold us together. Adrian slowed down so I could collect myself. When I had calmed down, I was to turn to face Malcolm, then open my mouth wide with a frightened expression. I kept shaking, though. Adrian was still sucking as I was trying to look frightened. I felt a bit faint at that moment. When I made that face, Malcolm pulled his cock from Claire's mouth, stood up, and crossed the mat to the stairs, a furious look on his face.

"Cut!" called Mr. Koolman. I wanted to collapse. I was shaking from that. I came hard! I thought I did ok during that scene, but you can never tell what the director will say. Adrian sucked as he slowly pulled his head back, but my cock didn't fall because it was still hard. I was still feeling those electrical pulses every few seconds. I sat on the floor to relax a bit, and Adrian kissed me with a big smile.

"You were brilliant!" he cried, "Absolutely bloody brilliant! You're such a bloody natural; I keep telling you!" He kissed me again.

"He's right, you know," said a gruff voice from behind me. I looked back and saw Roy holding his camera, smiling gently at me. "You're bloody marvelous, son!"

I lay on my back to catch my breath, and Adrian pulled my tangled shorts and undies from my shoes.

"All right," said Mr. Koolman. "I just want to say that was bloody perfect! I love you all! Applause for all of you! Tech crew as well. Camera operators, you were spot-on, every shot, spot fucking on!" Everyone applauded.

"Boys? Boys, are you still up there?" Adrian slapped my thigh to get my wandering attention. "Oh Adrian, let him rest if he needs it because he bloody well deserves it! He was incredible! Am I right, people?" There was a round of enthusiastic applause as I sat up to face Mr. Koolman.

"There you are, Trevor! I could not believe this was a new boy with no training. You were perfectly on cue, your expressions were honest, and Roy and Jimmy captured the most amazing footage when you came. It was joy! Pure joy!" Adrian threw my shorts and undies over the railing as everybody cheered. "Now we're going to do it all over again." There was a general moan across the set.

"Oh, don't worry. You all know how it's done. At least two takes of everything for safety." The moans subsided. Most of the cast and crew were still smiling, and none of the moanings was serious.

"Let's take fifteen, so the actors can collect themselves. Don't forget to thank craft services today. They've pulled out all the stops and laid out a wonderful buffet! I mean it, people, try the artichoke dip. It's bloody marvelous!" There was another round of applause and thank yous for craft services.

Adrian helped me to steady myself as I stood up. Then he kissed me sweetly and hugged me. "Bloody hell," I said to him, still feeling a bit unsteady, even shaking a bit. "You must be the best teacher in film if I'm really doing that bloody well on my second day!"

He slapped my ass and said, "And don't you forget it!"

"Fifteen minutes, people. That's fifteen minutes. We have a nurse call, nurse to the set please, nurse to the set. Wardrobe to the set. Diane, wardrobe to the set. Fluff call. That's fifteen minutes, and we have fluff call."

Chapter 17
Water

"Nurse Dan said I couldn't play with it. He didn't say I couldn't hold it!"

Everybody was so concerned! I just felt a little dizzy after doing a really good scene and cumming really hard, but Nurse Dan called my agent, my solicitor, and the on-call doctor at the studio clinic to get permission to give me an IV because I was dehydrated. I was embarrassed because everybody had to wait for me again, but Annie knew how to make me feel better, no matter what was bothering me.

***

We walked toward the stairs when the nurse, who had treated Adrian the day before, stopped me and asked me to sit in a chair that he seemed to have pulled out of nowhere. "Oh, bloody hell. Have fun, Trevor. I'm getting something to eat."

"What's wrong?" I asked the nurse.

"Oh, nothing's wrong at all," he said. "My name is Dan, and I'm the studio 2 set nurse today. You looked a bit shaky after that scene, and I think anybody would feel a bit shaky if they had put so much emotion into a performance. But it's standard that if anyone appears to be shaking, weak, dizzy, or faint, or sweaty when they shouldn't be, we have to check you over to make sure it's nothing serious."

He helped me out of my jacket and began to roll up my long sleeve. "It would be easier if we just remove the shirt as well. Would that be ok with you?" I nodded.

He pulled off my tie and helped me out of my shirt, leaving me naked except for my shoes and socks. It felt strange to have someone looking over my naked body with so many people around.

"Now, I'm just going to put this on you." He wrapped a blood pressure cuff around my right arm and then pressed a button on a box of some sort. I felt it squeezing my arm as he sat on the floor in front of me.

"No one's ever checked my blood pressure before," I said.

"Well, it's usually not a problem for kids, but if you look faint, we have to know. If it's low, you could pass out and get hurt. It's not worth the risk if you just need some water." He fussed around in his case for a few items and set them on his lap.

"Now I need to poke your finger," he said. Before I could say a word, he had pressed something that looked like a short, fat pen against my finger and made it click. I didn't felt a thing.

"What was that for?" I asked. It didn't hurt, but I resented being poked.

"Are you diabetic?" he asked.

"No, but my friend Emma at school is, and she has to take injections."

"Ok. This is the same blood test she takes several times a day. It's just to make sure your blood sugar is ok." I heard a beep, and then a second, much higher beep. It felt like I was in the hospital.

"Ok, your blood sugar is fine, maybe a bit low, but nothing to worry about, but your blood pressure is a little lower than we want it to be. When was the last time you had a pee?"

"The last time I had a pee?"

What business was it of his? But then I caught myself being annoyed. I kissed him and said, "Nurse Dan, before I forget, thanks for taking such good care of me." He smiled. I wasn't sure he heard that very often from us kids. "I think it was when I got out of bed today. We slept late, so that was… half past ten this morning, about then."

"Do you feel like you have to pee now?" he asked as he began pinching my skin in different parts of my body.

"No, not at all," I said. "Stop that! It tickles!" I giggled.

"Sorry, Trevor. I need to feel the texture of your skin. It's medical." he said with a wink. "Can you tell me everything you've had to drink today?"

"Er…" I had to think. I remembered feeling a little dizzy from the champagne at the party, and there was Randy's hangover cure. "I had a large glass of this drink that is made of half orange juice and half fizzy water at breakfast, and I opened a root beer in my dressing room, but I only had a sip of that."

"Ok, have you been feeling ill, or have you vomited or had any diarrhea today?" he asked, taking my temperature in my ear.

"No, none of that. I mean, I was just a bit dizzy from the party last night, but that got sorted with Randy's fizzy orange drink."

"Oh yes, of course," he said. "You had your signing party last night, congratulations! Did you have a good time?" I nodded happily. "Did you have lots of lovely champagne?"

"Oh, yes," I said. "But Randy watched me closely, and he saw to it that I didn't drink too much and make myself sick." He smiled as if he had a secret.

He had me stand up while he held my arm, and that made me feel dizzy again. He took my blood pressure while I was standing, and then he let me sit back down. He listened to my heart and measured my pulse. He said, "This sometimes happens in this business. It's a lot of work to have sex, a lot of exercises, even if you're just standing there receiving oral sex. It can sometimes get quite warm under the lights too, even with so many of these new LED lights, and you've been up near the ceiling on this walkway, which is warmer than the rest of the studio. Your body uses a lot of energy and loses a lot of water when you make porn. Right now, your body is just running a little low on water. I'm glad we got you checked. This is important. I'm going to walk with you downstairs. I am going to hold your arm, and I don't want any arguments about that, ok?"

"Ok, Dan," I said. "Will I have to go to the hospital?"

He ruffled my hair and said, "No, but I'm going to get you something to drink and maybe a snack once your blood pressure is back up. But you are going to have to stay on my exam lounge in the nursing station until you're better, ok?"

"Ok," I said quietly. I was so looking forward to spending the break with Annie. I was disappointed, but I remembered Dan was taking care of me, and that's a way to love somebody. I was getting better at this way of thinking.

Dan steadied me as I stood up and then helped walk me down the stairs. I felt everyone's eyes upon me as he helped me walk across the gym mat. It was too quiet, and I felt I could manage on my own. I felt silly having him hold my arm the whole way, but I promised I wouldn't argue.

"Don't worry, Trevor," he said, "They've all seen this before, and many of them have gone through this with me or one of the other set nurses themselves."

When we passed Judine, she didn't say anything, but Dan said to her, "Dehydration. Thirty minutes, possibly 45. Call craft services, will you Luv?"

Judine nodded and scribbled something on her clipboard and walked over to Mr. Koolman for a talk. As she walked, she made the call on her headset microphone, "Craft services to the nursing station with Pedialyte. That's craft services to the nursing station, one liter of Pedialyte."

When we got to the nursing station, I thought I was just going to climb onto the examination lounge and lie back, but instead, Dan picked me up. I looked into his sparkling blue eyes, which were framed by a rather friendly pair of eyeglasses, and realized how strong and beautiful this man was.

He laid me down gently on the lounge, which was covered with one of those super-soft Frenetic studio towels, and said, "Craft services is going to bring you something to drink. Have you ever had Pedialyte?"

"I don't think so," I said. "Isn't that for babies?"

"Oh no, not at all. Pro footballers drink it at the touchlines and during injury time. I think you'll like it, and it should make you feel much better."

He went to a cabinet, made a quick telephone call, then another one, and finally removed what looked like a bag of water and some tubing from the drawer. "I need to give you IV Fluids as well, Trevor. I just had a quick word with the doctor to get permission. He will drop by in a few minutes to say hello."

"What are IV fluids?" I asked.

"That means I poke you with a needle in the arm, and water drips directly into your blood. You'll be surprised how quickly it works and how good it makes you feel."

"I need a bloody injection?" I hated needles, and the one he had in his hand looked huge!

"Sorry, Trevor, but I'm very good at this, and you might be surprised that the larger needles hurt less than some of the smaller ones." I found that hard to believe. "And when you see how much better you feel, you'll thank me for this one. I'm afraid we have to do it this way. It's the safest and quickest way to rehydrate you. I also spoke with Markus. He makes your medical decisions now. It's in the contract your mum signed. Markus makes those decisions instead of her. He said we could do the IV, which means right now that we have to do it."

"Mum would have told you to put lemon juice in it or something," I said, cheering up a bit.

Nurse Dan poked me on the inside of my right elbow very quickly and said, "There, that's all there is to it." He taped the needle in place and connected the tubing coming down from the bag of water that he'd hung above the lounge. He raised an armrest and put my arm on it. "Keep your arm here, please, and try not to move around too much. This should only need to drip for about five to ten minutes."

"Trevor!" It was Annie, and I was very pleased to see him. He gave me a big hug and a few kisses from the opposite side of the lounge. "Can I stay with him, Dan? Is he ok?"

"Oh, he's fine, Luv," said Dan. "You've been here long enough to know about dehydration. You've had lessons in your S and S classes about water and acting under hot lights and such. He'll be as right as rain once we've filled him back up." (S and S stood for sex and stagecraft, which were classes that all Frenetic actors had to take, and I was looking forward to my first lessons in the coming autumn.)

"I don't like it when I hear them call for the nurse," Annie said. "It scares me, even though it's always nothing." He hugged me. "It's ok if I stay here with him, isn't it, Dan?"

"Of course it is, Annie," he said. "I just need to wait for the Pedialyte and watch Trevor here take a few swallows, and then I'll leave the two of you alone," he said. "You can share the lounge if you like. Please use the left side, though, so you don't interfere with Trevor's IV There's plenty of room for both of you there, but Trevor, you must stay right where you are until I clear you to get up, ok?"

"Ok, Dan, I promise," I said.

"And boys," he continued, turning to Annie, "nothing sexual either, not until I've cleared it. He's ok, but while he's like this, I just don't want him fainting or falling."

"Yes, Dan," pouted Annie.

"Fancy having such a bloody sexy fluff boy in a porn studio and having to be celibate!" I said.

Annie kissed me, and Dan laughed. "I expect you'll keep him busy soon enough. Annie, I think you're going to have a sore jaw tonight!" Annie play-punched him on the shoulder and hopped onto the lounge with me.

"And in good time, here comes the sweating lord!" said Dan as a middle-aged, balding man from craft services approached. They both had a good laugh, but it sounded like a very peculiar thing to say to somebody. I thought maybe it was an inside joke.

"Trevor, this is Hastings, one of the amazing crew we have working in craft services, and Hastings, I believe you already know this very, very pretty boy, Annie."

"Indeed I do," said Hastings, leaning down to kiss Annie. He held four plastic bottles with orange liquid in his hands. "I brought four bottles, two hundred fifty mL each," he said to Dan. Then, turning to me, he said, "And you, Trevor! Everything they were saying yesterday about you, I didn't know whether to believe a word of it, but what stage presence! What perfection in beauty, the perfect specimen of boy sexuality combined with such natural…"

"Thank you, Hastings!" said Dan, cutting him off. He opened a bottle and handed it to me, saying, "Drink as much of this stuff as you can, Trevor. It's just an orange-flavored drink. Keep a bottle nearby for the rest of the day, even on the set – out of shot, of course. Take at least one drink every time you have a break, and a big drink when you finish a shot. And Annie, see if you can help to keep him drinking. As much as you can, Trevor."

He put the other three bottles on a small shelf attached to the lounge. Then he said to Hastings, "I need to talk to you about something over here." He put his arm around Hastings' shoulder and guided him some distance away from us, yet still facing us until he saw me take my first drink.

***

"Attention! Attention on the set," Judine's voice rang out. "All cast, designers, and crew, we will resume filming in thirty minutes. We are taking a thirty minute break, fluff call as needed. Actors, if you do not require your FSP's, please let them know. You may dismiss them at your discretion for up to thirty minutes. And really, people, the artichoke dip is amazing. Try some, and show your love for craft services. Be ready for places in thirty minutes. That's thirty minutes, people. Thank you."

I gulped and looked at Annie with my eyebrows raised as the calls of "thirty minutes" went round the room. Because of me! Everybody had to wait for another bloody half-hour because of me!

"Stop that right now!" said Annie. "You think that you're the problem again. I can see it in your face, and drink some more of that. You've hardly touched it!"

"I love you, Annie," I said. "I'm trying to understand how that works. If I have a problem, and that makes everyone have to wait, I'm still not the problem? It really confuses me, but you make me feel good, and you remind me to stop thinking like that because you love me, right?"

"Of course I love you, daft boy!" He kissed me, and it felt so nice! "Now drink!"

***

When you're not feeling well, there is nothing quite like having an incredibly pretty boy lying naked with you.

He was a little older than me. He was nine, and I was eight, almost nine. But he was small for his age and slender. I was tall for my age and not so slender. We looked like a couple of boyfriends, a boyfriend and girlfriend if you just went by looks. We looked like a very young couple, but he was older than me, and he knew a lot more about everything. I felt that feeling again that I loved him so much it hurt, and a tear caught me by surprise and jumped out of my eye. Of course, he saw it, and that always meant we had to talk about it.

"Oh, Trevor, sweetie! I'm here with you; it's going to be all right," he said, giving me one of his very sweet hugs. "What's the matter, Luv?"

"Oh, it's silly," I said.

"Well, that hasn't stopped you from talking before, has it?" He licked my ear, which made me giggle just a bit.

I told him about how it sometimes hurt to feel such strong love for him, how even a quick thought of anything happening was enough to make me want to cry. I was embarrassed, but I had to trust him of all people, but what he said surprised me.

"I am here, Trevor," he said, kissing me, "and I love you."

No more? He always knew the right thing to say. He could explain strange feelings and help me understand the way I think. He was one of the smartest boys I'd known. I guess I was expecting a longer answer and something that was more comforting.

I think I looked worried because he kissed me with a smile, repeating, "I am here, Trevor, and I love you."

I thought for a bit. What was he telling me? I mean, I already knew he loved me, and of course he was here. There must be more.

"I don't understand," I told Annie. "Have you ever loved someone so much it hurts?"

"I don't think so," he said. "I've loved lots of people, but you're not like other people. I can't say it hurts, though. You make me happy when I see you, no matter what. Well, it's something more than happy, but I don't have a word for it. It makes me happy to think of you, and I thought about you all night last night and again when I woke up this morning. I've never known a boy like you. Knowing that you love me too is the nicest feeling I know. None of it hurts. It's all nice," he said.

He seemed to be thinking carefully before he spoke again. "Trevor," he continued, "If it hurts so much to think of something happening, then why do you think about such things? I'm here, Trevor. Nothing bad has happened, and I love you. I don't think there can be anything better, but I think you want something more… some handcuffs maybe?"

He held our hands up together as if they were locked in cuffs and gave that wonderful giggle of his again. "I'm not ready to get married if that's what you're thinking!" He grinned and licked my nose this time.

I smiled, but I was unable to laugh this time. "Maybe it's because everything is going so fast, and sometimes it seems like none of this is real, the studio, my contract, all the money, making great sex films, and then you," I told him.

"It's so much to think about in just two days. So many things have become so wonderful in such a short time, and I think it feels too good to be true. It's never happened to me before. That's not how things work in my life. And you're the best part of everything that's happened, so if it's all too good to be true, that means you're too good to be true as well."

He smiled, and I think he blushed, just a little before he kissed me. "I think you will learn in your own time that all of this really is true," he said. "Just remember, I'm here and I love you."

It seemed he still knew the perfect thing to say, only when I thought about things later, I realized that he hadn't said anything really. I was the one who'd finally worked it out – with his help.

"Now drink!" he said, kissing me yet again. He could never kiss me too much. I grew taller and taller, stronger and stronger, with each kiss. I took a large drink from my bottle, and I noticed I'd gotten another stiffie. I looked down at it, and Annie looked around before putting his hand on it.

"You know we can't," he said, just holding my boner.

"Yeah, I know," I said, "But a boy can pretend!" This time I kissed him.

***

We stayed like that, arm in arm, with his hand on my cock, for what seemed like ages. Then I heard a familiar man's voice call, "Trevor!" It was Randy. Annie hurriedly removed his hand from my boner, which immediately fell limp.

"They called me on my cell phone and told me you'd become ill," he said with some urgency. "I've spoken with Nurse Dan. How are you feeling, Hawk Boy? Er, Trevor?"

It was unlike Randy to forget anything, especially his professionalism at the studio, so I was surprised when he got my name wrong. I kissed him and said with a huge smile, "Oh, I'm just fine." I turned and kissed Annie again. "Annie makes me feel wonderful, no matter what."

He held up the bottle I was drinking from, which was more than half empty. "Good boy, Trevor," he said. "See if you can finish it soon and get into another bottle." I thought he must be mad! Annie had been pushing and pushing me to drink more and more, but my stomach didn't feel very well.

"Oh, he's doing his best," said Annie. It's nice to see you, Randy," he said, leaning over me to kiss him.

"Thanks for looking after my boy, Annie," said Randy.

Annie giggled and kissed me. "Sorry, Randy, but he's my boy now!"

"Sorry, Randy," I repeated with a smile.

"Oh, fine," he said. "Do you feel well enough to talk about some business?"

"Can Annie stay?"

"Certainly, if you don't mind. Listen, Trevor," he said, "I've been to the bank with Markus. He's got your accounts set up. The thousand quid from my wall safe at home is in your spending account, but we had to take a hundred out of it to open your college fund. When he gets the check for your first monthly stipend, which covers July, he will deposit nine hundred of that into your college fund and put the other hundred into your spending account. They should be able to cut that check yet this afternoon." This was so much money! Annie could tell I was breathing faster, so he held my hand, which made me relax.

He showed me a plastic Visa card that had my name on it. "I will keep this for you until we leave. It works with your spending account. We will be talking about how to manage your spending money tonight. For now, just remember that you can only spend a certain amount of money with this card before it stops working." I nodded. "You will also be paid your bonus money after the shoot. You've been behaving, I trust? Not bothering the fluff girls and cheating?"

Annie giggled, and I said, "No, Sir, I've been a perfectly good little boy." I don't think he liked the way I smiled because he turned abruptly to Annie with a nervous look.

Annie smiled and said, "Really, he's been a good boy. He's been tempted, but he's kept himself eligible. We're looking after him. Claire has been teasing him a bit, but I think he likes it."

I just then remembered something. "Randy, can we go shopping after we leave the studio today?"

"If you like," he said.

"I like the nice clothes that Sebastian has, and I want to have my own." I thought about it, and I decided to ask, "Annie? Are you free tonight? Can you go shopping with us? Only I want to buy… er… I'd love your help in choosing… in choosing some pretty pink girl clothes."

Randy tried to suppress a laugh, and Annie hugged and kissed me for what must have been the thousandth time that day. "Of course, I'd love to help you get kitted out!" he said, "but I'm afraid I can't do it tonight. Mum and I have plans of our own, but maybe you can come shopping with Mum and me on Saturday?"

I nodded excitedly, then told Randy, "I still want to go shopping tonight with Sebastian, though."

"We'll have to see if Sebastian has plans, but yes, that will be fine. It will be a good opportunity to learn how to use your new card as well. Come now, Trevor. Drink up!"

Randy kissed me and walked off to speak with Nurse Dan.

"Trevor," inquired Annie, "Do you feel like you might really be a girl?"

I felt shy talking about it. Why didn't I feel comfortable telling him everything? "No," I said softly, "but Sebastian has so many wonderful and sexy clothes, and he says that a lot of them are girls' clothes. Mostly I can't tell which clothes are girl's clothes or just sexy boys' clothes. And," I added hesitantly, "maybe, sometimes, I think I want to be pretty too."

Annie kissed me and said, "Obviously, I know what you mean. I wondered about that when I first met you at Randy's house. The way you and Sebastian were acting together was a bit of a sign. He's a proper right queen, our Sebastian!"

How did he know more about me than I did? He read the question in my face right away and said, "Sweetie, when you've been in this business a little longer, I think you'll find it easier to tell who's who when you meet them. I definitely felt some girl tendencies coming from you, though usually you act very much like a boy, a sensitive boy, and that's the best kind. Now have another drink."

I turned the bottle up and took a tiny sip, trying to make it look like I'd had more. "When I'm with Sebastian, I think I get a little girly. Today for a while, it felt like we were sisters. It was pretend, but it was fun pretend!" He nodded as if he understood perfectly.

"I think it's because I've been told so many things about girls and boys and sex that weren't true, and I just want to try a little of everything."

"Even girls," I thought.

"It feels so nice, like I'm free, and Mum can't tell me those things anymore because I know better!" I said, speaking a little louder. "There aren't any silly rules like she says!"

***

Dan came back to the nursing station and looked me over again. He looked at my now-empty Pedialyte bottle and said, "Good boy, Trevor! That was quite a lot! That's exactly what we needed. How do you feel?"

"Better than ever, Dan," I said as he removed the tape from the IV line and pulled it out. He left a ball of cotton over the spot where the needle was and taped it in place.

"Great," he said. "I'm going to look you over again to make sure you're rehydrated enough to carry on with this scene. It's so much easier working with you porn actors because you're already undressed, and I can see and reach everything without any fuss.," he said with a grin. "We should be able to remove this in a few minutes," he said, indicating the tape on my arm.

He had me stand up while he took my blood pressure. "Any dizziness?" he asked.

"None at all," I replied. It was then that I realized just how much better I felt. He did the same skin pinching as before, and I tried not to giggle. He listened to my heart and everything else he had done upstairs, all except poking my finger.

"Excellent," he said. "You're in perfect condition, you can leave my station, and you can have all the sex you want." Annie immediately grabbed my cock, which hardened instantly.

"Before you go to places," he said, "I need to remove your tape and the cotton and make sure it's not bleeding. When the shoot is done, I want to see you pee, if you haven't already. I don't want you leaving this stage area until you've had a pee. I'll put a large cup with a lid that has your name on it in the private loo here, at the nursing station. I want you to pee into that big cup, put the lid back on, and tell me or Judine immediately every time you have to use the toilet today.

"Pee everything into the cup, and don't pee into the toilet at all. Leave the cup on the back of the toilet where you found it. I need to look it over and measure how much comes out. That is your private toilet for the rest of the day. Remember to tell me when you've peed, ok, Trevor?"

Chapter 18
Retake

It's nice to know professionals on the set surround me. Of course, Annie was my favorite professional, but Mr. Koolman, Diane, and Judine were also very professional and very good at their jobs, though sometimes it seemed Diane liked her job a little too much. Is that really possible?

You can see two of the boys who weren't selected as FSP's for our film working as stagehands. That's another option if you are friendly with the director or any of the technical designers. That's Rudi on the left, pushing and pulling the dolly camera along the tracks, and Étienne, the one holding the boom microphone. Most people thought Étienne was in love with Mr. Koolman. If he weren't cast as an actor, he would fluff for anybody at all on one of Mr. Koolman's films or work for even less pay as a stagehand. Mr. Koolman permitted Étienne to remain in the studio, even if he had no part in a production. (Most people also thought Étienne's feelings for Mr. Koolman were mutual.)

***

"Ok, people, the break is over! Let's reset for scene 4b! Reset for 4b, please! We need stage lights up and checked, and we need the work lights down. Wardrobe on the set, please! Wardrobe, check all actors, please. Makeup, we need makeup checks on all actors, please, makeup! Cameras, check positions and focus. Cameras, position and focus, please. Carpenters, we now have a report of a loose stair rail on the set. Check that, please! Carpenters to the set to check the railing. Fluff call! We have a fluff call, please! All FSP's are here. Actors, FSP's are available if needed. Craft services, strike the food from the set please, craft services. Reset for scene 4b! We are at ten minutes, people, ten minutes!" It was the longest call I'd heard Judine make.

"Ten minutes, thank you," echoed around the stage area.

I had asked Annie to come up to the walkway for some fluff work in the place where Adrian and I were shooting, but we didn't quite make it there. Diane caught up with us, holding my uniform on a hanger. So Annie got to his slender, delicate knees and started sucking my cock right in the middle of the gym mat. I gave Diane a kiss and a smile, happy that I was learning how to do things differently. She smiled back, but she seemed to be in more of a hurry than usual. In a few seconds, I could see why.

Mr. Koolman walked up to us and said, "Hi Trevor! How are you feeling? Ok?"

"Oh yes, Sir," I grunted out as Annie did his work. "Nurse Dan says I'm as good as new."

"Ok, Trevor," he said. "I want to know how you feel about doing this scene again. I mean 4b. Do you think you can handle it after what just happened?"

"Oh yes Sir, no problem." Nurse Dan joined us then and stopped Diane from dressing me.

"Ok, ok," he said, "But if you feel even the least bit faint, dizzy, or weak, you call out the word 'hold' as loud as you can, ok? That's a sort of safe word. It means we need to stop because something is wrong or someone isn't comfortable. This is supposed to be for love and for fun, not for making people get sick or hurt."

"Yes Sir," I said. Dan carefully peeled the tape back from my arm. I turned to watch. There was no bleeding, but Dan carefully used an alcohol wipe to clean some tape goo from my skin around the needle hole.

"I need you to give me your word now, Trevor," Mr. Koolman said seriously. "Promise me you will call hold at the first sign of trouble and not try to tough it out. Do I have your word?" Dan also nodded as the director spoke.

"Yes, Sir," I said. "I promise."

It felt like serious business to make a promise like that to the director. I bet he could fire me if I got sick again and didn't say anything. I couldn't risk losing this wonderful new life on my second day. I resolved to myself not to get sick anymore, but to call "hold" if I ever felt bad.

"Excuse me, Sir," said Dan. "You're ready to go now, Trevor. Remember to keep a bottle of Pedialyte with you and keep drinking it, and remember what I said about the toilet."

"Thanks, Dan," I said. "I remember." I kissed him and thanked him for helping me before he walked away.

"A good man, our Dan. He's an excellent nurse," said Mr. Koolman. "Ok, there's one more thing I want to ask you. The take we just did was absolutely spectacular. You looked incredible, but I want to ask how you feel about us using it in the film." I must have given him a confused look, but really I think it had more to do with Annie's blowjob.

"You see, Trevor, if someone gets hurt or becomes sick while we are shooting, we do not want to use that footage unless they give their permission. We don't like to use takes that made people sick or hurt, but sometimes they turn out to be fantastic shots like yours just did. When that happens, sometimes we make an exception, but only with your permission. What do you think, Trevor?"

"It's fine," I said. "I don't see the fuss… I mean, yes please, if it makes the movie better."

"Ok, Trevor, thank you," he said. "I still need to clear it with your agent first, but thank you very much for all you've done for us!" He leaned over and kissed me.

Diane had put my shirt, tie, and jacket on while Mr. Eastman was talking with me. She was straightening my socks as he walked off. "Lift your right foot, please, sweetie," she said.

When I did, she put my foot through the leg opening on my satin sexy bikini undies and then through the leg opening on my shorts. She did the same on my left side as Annie really did something magical. His hands were pretty. Every part of him was incredibly pretty and sexy.

"I'll come and check on you in a few minutes," Diane whispered to me. "Bye cutie," she said with a quick kiss.

Annie could sense that I was getting ready to cum again. It's hard not to cum with such a pretty boy giving you such a skillful blowjob in front of everybody. He suggested we move back upstairs as we had originally planned. He pulled my sexy undies up, then my shorts. I didn't tuck my shirt in because he was going to have my shorts right down again as soon as we were in position. When we reached the walkway, we started snogging, and we didn't feel like stopping.

"Five minutes! We are at five minutes everyone," called Judine. "Makeup and wardrobe, final checks, please. Lights and sound, final checks. Cameras, check focus, position, and levels. FSP's finish it up and return to the fluff area when your actor releases you. Five minutes everyone!"

I'd heard her, but snogging with Annie felt more important than returning her call. He tried to pull away, but I held him close and said, "I haven't released you yet!"

We kept at it for a few more minutes when Diane found us again. "Trevor, you look a fright!" she said.

I reluctantly and slowly pulled away from Annie's kiss and said, "I suppose I better release you now. I love you, Annie!" He walked away quickly. FSP's and their actors can both get into trouble if the FSP isn't back in the fluff area when the places call is made.

"I can't take my eyes off you, sweetheart," said Diane, "and now I see I shouldn't take my eyes off you."

"Sorry, Diane," I said. "Lost track of time."

"Lost track of your willy, more likely," she said with a wink as she pulled my shorts down a bit and smoothed my shirt out. "I don't blame you at all, though," she said as she pulled my shorts back up. "He is a very pretty boy, and so very sweet. I don't understand why he's a boy, but Jeanine is a girl. She's a bit of a tomboy, Jeanine is, but Annie is more delicate and pretty, like a proper girl. It takes all sorts, I suppose, and it's a good thing too because we have all sorts here," she said with a smile as she finished with my belt.

"I guess if a girl can be a tomboy, then a boy can be delicate and pretty, maybe a sort of anniegirl," I said. "I do love him, Diane."

"I know," she said with a wink. "Must dash. It's nearly places." She gave me a kiss and hurried downstairs.

***

We repeated scene 4b uneventfully, and I even managed to cum on cue again. I didn't bark as loudly, but I tried to get the same look on my face, only I couldn't remember precisely what that look was. I tried my best, but it's hard to think when you're getting your willy sucked by a boy like Adrian and you're cumming.

Annie had me ready to cum before we'd even begun 4b, which is a fluff boy's job, and Adrian is a cock-sucking master. I would be asking him for tips soon, both him and Sebastian. Annie was extremely good at blowjobs as well, but somehow it felt wrong to ask about his technique. I wanted his blowjobs to be his special gift to me, and if I learned to give him the same kind of blowjob, it would seem less meaningful. In a way, it would also seem a bit like masturbation.

Chapter 19
Clean

"But he just had that in his ass!"

I learned something about filming anal sex that day. I learned that people who were scheduled to be fucked, were expected to show up clean, both inside and out. That means having an enema before arriving at the studio. I was too embarrassed even to know how to talk about it!

***

"Ok, people, that's a wrap for scene 4b. Actors, take five while we set for 4c. Makeup and wardrobe, do your checks, please, makeup and wardrobe. Lighting, set for 4c and check focus, lighting. Sound, boom operators in position please, boom operators. Floor cameras, set for long shots, long shots only, please. Walkway cameras, as you were, the same position, take five. Fluff call! All FSP's report to your actors, please. We have a fluff call. We are at five minutes people, five minutes."

I wondered why Judine's calls were getting longer and longer. Maybe some people forgot to do their jobs if she didn't remind them.

Adrian pulled my sexy green satin knickers and my shorts up. "Great scene, mate," he said before kissing me and heading downstairs. "Let's have another one!" I followed after him. While he went for another bite at the craft table, I went to the fluff area to be with my sweet Annie again, leaving my nearly full bottle of Pedialyte behind.

When I arrived, Malcolm was ass-fucking the same tall, slender, pretty, and very sissy blond fluff boy, Ryan, who'd worked for him the day before. Ryan was on all fours with his face pressed into the huge fluff mattress, moaning pitifully, but Malcolm slapped him on his ass, saying, "Ah shut your whining, you little ponce!"

I thought Ryan must be one of those kids who liked it when others were rough with them like Amber was yesterday. Then Malcolm pulled his cock out of Ryan's ass and turned him around, still on all fours, and offered his cock to Ryan's mouth. Ryan gobbled it up hungrily.

"Eew!" I said to Annie, who was already arm-in-arm with me, having given me another full bottle of Pedialyte, "That's nasty! It was just in his ass!"

Annie giggled a bit before replying. "It all about what people like. That's called ATM, or ass-to-mouth. Ryan likes that sort of thing. Besides, he always cleans himself out carefully before coming to the studio. I mean enemas."

"Eew!" I said again. "Mum had to give me enemas once when I was little. It made me hurt inside my belly, and when I sat on the toilet, I didn't just shit. I shot poo bullets into the toilet. Fancy doing that every day before going to work!"

"Trevor, sweetie, Hunny," began Annie," there's something you need to know. When you do anal here, when someone fucks you, it's an important courtesy before the shoot to have an enema. No one wants brown all over when they're doing a shot. The minimum you should do is have a poo before coming to the studio and make sure everything comes out."

I stared at him for a moment, my mouth opening a little more each second. "But Jeanine is going to fuck me in this next scene! I didn't know!"

"Randy should have told you this when he got your script. Didn't Sebastian tell you? Didn't he show you? He does them every day because he always bottoms." I just shook my head. "Well, did you poo this morning?"

"I'm embarrassed, Annie! I like you a lot, and I don't want to be disgusting with you!"

"I had a good solid stool this morning. It came out in two pieces, and it felt complete," he said. "My plan was to fluff for you, so I wanted to be clean for you in case you wanted to fuck me or use toys in my ass, so I rinsed out with a plain water enema, and I'm glad I did." I was stunned.

"See, Trevor? There's nothing wrong with talking about these things and nothing disgusting about doing them. Now tell me because this is important. Have you had a poo yet today?"

"Well yeah," I said, feeling my face burning, "but… but I don't know… I mean it was all… from the champagne, I think."

"It's more helpful if you speak plainly," he said. "I am going to have a guess at what you mean. You had a poo before you came in, but it was all soft and a bit messy because of what you had to drink last night, and you're not sure it all came out?" he said. "And you've been farting?" That made me laugh nervously, and I felt better because he understood everything. "You can't keep it a secret when you're farting," he said, to my embarrassment again. But he saw my embarrassment and kissed me. "Come on. We haven't much time."

He took me by the hand and led me back to the nurse's station. "Back so soon, Trevor?" asked Dan. "Feeling a little shaky again?"

"No Dan," I said. "It's just… Annie says… er…"

"He's doing anal this scene, and he didn't know about enemas," said Annie, to my horror. "From the sound of things this morning, he had better have it done before this shoot. We must be at only two or three minutes too."

I was so embarrassed I wanted to cry. That nice, beautiful Nurse Dan was going to give me an enema? In front of Annie?

"Ok, Annie, would you please tell Judine we're going to need at least another five here, and then have her send wardrobe? There's a good boy," he said as he gave a quick kiss to Annie.

An idea flashed through my head about a picture of Annie and Nurse Dan kissing. It was a very pretty thing to see for that instant. Sometimes I've wished I had a camera in my eyes… an eyeball camera.

Dan unfolded a small cot and asked me to remove my shorts and my sexy green satin bikini undies, which I did while he rummaged through a large drawer. "Now lie on your belly, on the cot," he said. "Good. Now keep your head and your shoulders down, but bring your knees up under your belly, so you're pointing your bottom up toward me. That's it," he said as he adjusted my position a bit. "Legs apart just a bit more, that's good. Now I'm going to put some lubricant on you, only a little." I felt his slippery, gloved finger swirling around and poking just a tiny bit into my hole. He made me feel so good! I wished he'd put his finger all the way in and…

"There now. Next, I'm going to put a small tube inside you. This won't hurt a bit." I could feel the tube sliding in, still wishing it could be his finger, or…

"Now comes the fun part," he said. "I am going to fill you with a warm liquid through this tube. When I do that, you'll want to go to the toilet quite urgently, but you must stay in this position and hold it in as long as you can. Try to count to fifty. When you get to fifty, or when you feel you just can't hold it any longer, get up and sit on the toilet. We're right in front of the door, and no one else may use this particular toilet but you. Do you understand what I need you to do?"

"Yes," I frowned. "Mum did this with me once, and it was awful! I mean, it hurt when she did it, and I didn't like it."

"I'm sorry you had a bad experience, Trevor," said Dan,"But you should know a few things. Unless you are only willing to take non-bottoming roles, you will be expected to come prepared and clean, inside and out. If you accept only non-bottoming roles, work might be hard to find, especially as a little." I sighed. I needed to do the roles that Randy chose for me so we could make money and be successful.

"The second thing is that I don't think the enema you got from your mum was done properly. It shouldn't hurt. It should only make you feel like you have to go to the toilet very urgently. I think you will be pleasantly surprised with what we do here. In fact, your friend Sebastian loves enemas. The more often you do them, the more comfortable you will feel, and who knows, maybe you will come to enjoy them as well.

"The third thing is that you can refuse this if you want, but it sounds like there's a high risk of making a mess for Jeanine, and that could be difficult for everyone. They would have to stop and clean her and you every time someone saw brown." There I was, about to make everybody wait while they cleaned my shit from Jeanine's cock! That would be far worse than this enema.

"But you don't have to go through with the enema, and you don't even have to go through with the scene. You're still a very new boy, and Mr. Eastman knows that new boys have problems and setbacks, and he plans for those setbacks and production delays when he works with new kids. That is why you make so much less money today than you will make after you are more experienced. So choose well. Be brave and do the scene after having an enema, or if you need to, choose wisely and only do what you're ready to do."

"We are on hold, people. We will be ready for places in five minutes. That's five minutes, people" There it was, Judine's call announcing that I was already making everyone wait for me again. Again! I wasn't going to do that again!

"Ok, Nurse Dan," I said. "I want to do it. I want the enema because I want to do things better. I want to be a better child porn actor, and you said it shouldn't really hurt."

"That's the Trevor I've come to know in such a short period of time! You don't know how perfectly you fit in here. You won't know that until you've met a few other new boys who don't fit in so well." They kept saying things like that every time I made them wait for me. Surely they were just trying to make me feel better so we could finish this scene.

"Ok now, I'm going to start the liquid. It will fill you up pretty fast. Remember to hold it in and count to fifty if you can, and then you can dash off to the toilet."

"Ok Dan, I'm ready."

I gritted my teeth and clenched my ass around the tube, expecting huge, painful cramps. Instead, it felt like a balloon was slowly inflating inside of me. I felt like I needed to fart, not shit. Then I felt his warm hand across my bare ass. I think he was trying to hold the tube in place and make me feel relaxed at the same time.

"How are you doing, my friend?" he asked.

"It's ok," I replied. "This is much different from the one Mum gave me."

"That's excellent, Trevor," he said. "We're almost done. Squeeze tight now. We don't want any leaking out."

I clenched my ass as tightly as I could. As he finished putting the liquid inside me, I felt like my insides were ready to burst, and I felt the liquid wanting to blast straight out of me. It started to hurt a little, like there was too much.

"You need to feel some pressure, so we know there's enough," he said when I told him so. "Are you counting?"

"I forgot," I grunted, still clenching.

"Well, it's a good thing I didn't forget to count," he said with a smile. "It's time. Go ahead to the toilet, and I'll close the door after you."

I rose from the cot quickly but carefully, not wanting to leak. I dashed ten feet to the toilet and heard the door close behind me. Dan had even lowered the seat for me. As I sat down on the toilet, I could feel a small amount leak out. Then I had that rocket engine and poo bullets feeling again. I felt the whole toilet shake when the pieces came out. I wiped when I was done, and I got the tiny bit that leaked, which wasn't brown at all. I had to look before I flushed. There wasn't a lot, but it looked pretty soft and squishy still. That would have made a terrible mess for poor Jeanine.

I heard Judine call, "Wardrobe to the nursing station please. Diane, wardrobe to the nursing station," as I flushed and washed my hands.

I stepped out of the loo and saw Diane standing with Dan, holding my sexy satin bikini knickers and what looked like a new, clean pair of shorts. She smiled at me and gave me a wink. Really, she wasn't bad at all.

"Ok Trevor, you gorgeous hunk of boy, why don't you come sit here," she said as she knelt beside the cot. "Good hun. Now just lift your soft, sexy legs for me, ok sweetie, so that I can get your feet through these… lovely."

She made a comment to Dan about how warm it was in the studio, but I'm sure it was meant to buy time so she could rub my bare parts before covering them. I was beginning to feel genuinely happy to share myself with her. Her hands on my skin somehow made me feel like she was having part of me, and it was a part that made her happy. It was like when Markus was sucking my cock in the limousine the night before and the others rubbed the champagne all over my body, and I felt as if I belonged to the whole world, and the world wanted me. Diane's touch was a smaller version of that.

"Ok now, stand up, sweetie, so I can finish up. Oh, but I do hate to cover this," she said as she tugged my willy, which made me giggle.

"Come now, Diane," said Dan. "He has a scene. He'll have them down around his ankles before they start!"

I left my shorts open and my sexy satin green undies pulled down so she could see my willy until I turned away to walk to the fluff area. Annie and I still had a minute for a quick kiss. "How was it?" he asked.

"Fine," I said. "No problem. Bit uncomfortable, nothing bad."

"Good," he said. "Is that something you think you can do every time you come to do an anal scene?"

"I don't like it," I said, "but I'll definitely do it."

"It will become much easier," he said.

"Nurse Dan said so too. Annie, he's very sweet, and he's strong, and so, so handsome!"

Annie surprised me by getting a dreamy look on his face. "I know Trevor. Oh, I do know! He doesn't play with kids very often, but when he does, he likes boys, sissy boys at that." We both sighed.

"Oh! Silly fluff boy!" he said with a start. "Let me get you, hard sweetie." He got to his knees and did that special Annie magic that only he could do. Getting me hard was never difficult, but I'd rather have him do it than anybody else.

Chapter 20
Pussy

"Please, just don't get sick!"

I wasn't ready for this, but can anybody be ready to eat pussy for the first time, and on-camera? I had a lot of strange thoughts about what a girl might have up there, and I was nervous. How well do you think you'd handle it?

***

"Places, please! We are at places! FSP's to the fluff area immediately. Actors, release your FSP's. Malcolm and Ryan that means you! Makeup and wardrobe, clear the set. Cameras check focus and position for St. Felix Academy, scene 4c. We are at places!"

Adrian and I were upstairs on the walkway again. He was on his knees in front of me, and he had pulled my shorts and my super-sexy satin bikini knickers down around my ankles and begun sucking me before places was even called. He said he just liked sucking my cock, and I wasn't about to complain. Roy was behind me with his camera, and Jimmy was behind Adrian with his camera. The third camera remained suspended from cables. I hadn't noticed it before, but there was a furry probe thing attached to the hanging camera, which Adrian told me was our microphone, along with the ones mounted on Roy and Jimmy's cameras.

"Ok everybody," said Mr. Koolman as he walked to the center of the mat and stood over Malcolm and the girls, already posed, with Malcolm idly dipping his cock in and out of Claire's mouth and Jeanine's face in Claire's pussy. "Jeanine Hunny, stay in position, but no tongue while we're talking, ok? We know what a fuss Claire can make, and I want to be heard."

After the laughter died down, and after Jeanine surprised Claire with a sudden, deep lick, making her bark as I had done earlier, Mr. Koolman continued. "We have seen some magic here already today people, and I mean masterpiece performances. I mean really, does anybody truly believe that our Trevor up there has had no experience in child porn? Does anybody believe that?" Applause.

"But that's not true!" I yelled out before I realized what he'd meant. "…Sir. I mean, sorry to interrupt." Again, I was utterly embarrassed as everybody laughed.

"Trevor!" chuckled the director. "You are family here! You belong here, and you will turn this business upside-down! You will bring competing studios to their knees inside two years. Mark my words, dear boy." I was still embarrassed when he said all those nice things about me, but less embarrassed than when I'd put my foot in my mouth. Adrian sucked a little harder.

"Trevor," he resumed, "you have delivered two brilliant performances here so far. Dare we hope for a third? Perhaps it is your lack of training and your fresh approach to this work, and your true joy for this work, that makes you so refreshingly good. The critics will explore those questions once we've released this film, but for now, I have a few notes for scene 4c.

"Since I have your attention up there, Trevor, let's begin with you. I know Adrian has discussed method acting with you. For the rest of scene 4, you are being bullied. You've done something wrong by spying on the girls, but Malcolm is overreacting, and he frightens you, like a big, strong bully who is much older than you. I think every boy knows that feeling, getting caught doing something naughty, and then being treated cruelly by a big, strong bully, am I right, Trevor?"

What an embarrassing thing to ask a boy, especially in front of everyone! I nodded my head slowly and softly muttered, "Yes Sir."

The room became deafeningly quiet. I considered the idea that this might be a room full of people who would all stick up for me, each and every one of them if a bully tried to hurt me again. The thought filled me with such joy that another happy tear leaped from my eye. I sniffled and tried to wipe it away quickly before anyone noticed it.

Mr. Koolman remained silent. I wished he'd talk to someone so everyone would stop looking at me. After a pause, he said, "Trevor, perhaps that memory is too strong. If it causes you too much pain to think about it, then let's find something else, shall we?"

Now what had I done? I am feeling overjoyed with the love all around me, and he thinks I've been traumatized by bullying!

"No Sir!" I said quickly. "It wasn't that at all. It was…" I couldn't bring myself to say it! I knew I would cry like a baby. I was so close to tears already. Did I have to say it out loud? "Sir, I've been caught doing wrong, and yes, I've been picked on by bullies. It was something else, something that…" I stopped again. They all loved me so much, and they were hanging on every word I had to say.

Adrian pulled his head back, letting my cock pop out of his mouth, and said quietly, "Tell them, mate. He keeps putting you on the spot all the bloody time. Tell them how you feel! Put them on the bloody spot! If you cry a lot, so much the better! They love you, Trev, and you can't hide from that."

"Sir," I steeled myself, "And all the rest of you, er, Adrian says I should tell you something, so here g-g-goes…" I stammered as Adrian resumed his station. "I didn't mean to cry or anything. It's just that when I said yes, I had been bullied," I sniffled again, and another tear fell. I wished I could just say this and not be a big crybaby in front of everyone! They were all waiting for me again! "When I said that, you all got so quiet. Then I thought…" I had to sniffle again and rub my eyes. "I thought, about why you might be so quiet. Maybe everyone wants to be quiet for the boy who's upset. Or maybe it's… Maybe you would…" I began to sob, and Adrian caressed my ass in a kind of hug. "You see, it's like I'm having this dream, a dream with all of you people in it, and you… you…"

I cried in earnest at that point. Adrian stood up and hugged me. He called out, "Wait for it. Trust me; you'll be glad you did. You lot will be like this soon enough."

Adrian was wonderful to have in an emotional pinch. Soon I was settled, and I just rammed the words out of my mouth all at once. "I thought maybe you were all so concerned about me being bullied because you love me so much, and I would feel sorry for anyone who tried to pick on me here, with you lot around. Because maybe you all really do love me that much!" I resumed my crying, but I had said what I needed to say.

"There there, mate, there there," said Adrian as he held me close. "You might not realize it, but we see a lot of this in the new kids too. It's sad that love comes as such a surprise to so many of us, but here you are. You found us, mate."

I hadn't noticed it at first, but slowly I became aware of how many people were blowing their noses at once. Then I heard the most beautiful sound I've ever heard in my whole life.

"Of course we really do love you that much, you daft boy!" It was Annie! He was smiling and wiping his nose with one of his hand towels. A cheer arose from the cast and crew.

That was it. That was the beginning of my acceptance, my real acceptance, that I had found the place where I belonged, that I was loved, that Annie loved me, that the place was not going to go away, and that all of it was true, not just some dream. (My acceptance would suffer its setbacks, though, and I would have to go through this process a few more times before it really took hold.)

I'd been wiping my nose on my jacket sleeve. Adrian handed me my shorts and said, "Here. Blow."

I blew my nose into my shorts, and immediately I heard Judine call "Hold, please. Wardrobe to the set, wardrobe to the set, upstairs walkway, please. Hold places, everyone."

***

It turned out that I only needed a clean jacket because my shorts were already around my ankles, and I would just step out of them as soon as I moved. My lower half would be naked until the end of the scene, which was the end of the film. Diane helped me into the clean jacket, which was the one that Jeanine had sprayed milk on earlier that day, and she unfastened a few of my lower shirt buttons. "You had three of these unfastened at the end of 4b. That's called continuity, sweetie," she said as she kissed me and left.

"All right, everybody, shall we continue where we left off," said the director. "Clearly, you have your motivation, Trevor. Mostly fear of the bully hurting you, then annoyance that he is forcing you to be with a girl, and then disgust at having to eat her pussy. Fear, annoyance, disgust. Finally, your disgust is eased when you feel Jeanine's cock in your ass. At first, you don't know who's it is, but a cock in your ass takes your mind off the unpleasant job of eating pussy. Remember, be yourself and discover how you feel about what you are about to do. Do not act when you eat this truly lovely pussy of Claire's."

"Oh, merci, Monsieur le directeur!" said Claire, opening her legs farther and not blushing at all.

"Adrian, fear and pain. That's all. You've been caught, you fear Malcolm, and he's going to fuck you hard as punishment. Sell it, boy. We must feel pain when Malcolm's big, beautiful cock rams into you."

"Got it," said Adrian.

"Malcolm, you're the stallion. Two little pussy ponies are threatening your herd. Make them pay. They must remember you!"

"Aye sir, that they will," said Malcolm in his Scottish brogue.

"Girls, you are too busy, too far in ecstasy to notice the sound Trevor has just made with his orgasm, but Claire, Hunny, I need you to look after Malcolm as he goes upstairs. To you, he is not going upstairs. He is going away from you. Nothing else matters. He's left you, and he's taken his cock with him. When he hits the stairs, maybe come up on your elbows and look down. Watch Jeanine for a few seconds, and you will forget about Malcolm, ok?"

"Oui bien, Monsieur," said Claire.

"Now girls, you are going to share Trevor," said Mr. Koolman. "You two both adore him because he's so young and so cute. When he tries to avoid your pussy, push his head in. Malcolm will help you for a while, but he will be off to the side with Adrian in short order. Oh, and Adrian, we're changing that to a hard, dry hump, so be sure to lube up now so we can get a good first insertion. Use a towel. We can't have the lube showing in the lights. And Claire, hunny, when you push his head into your pussy, I want you laughing, and then I want you reacting. No matter what he does, it makes you want to cum. Jeanine, after you let go of his hair, I want you to give Trevor 30 seconds to settle into eating Claire's pussy, then you start eating his ass. I want a full minute of that before you insert.

"Now remember people, this is Trevor's first time ever eating pussy! Let's hear it for our boy!" More applause, only this time it wasn't so embarrassing. "Claire, keep that in mind. Push his face in, but make sure you are reacting to everything he does because he doesn't know what he's doing, and his character is not supposed to know what he's doing. That's why we pay that bonus, folks. It's for the realism."

He clapped his hands slowly and loudly for attention and said, "Ok people, you know the routine. There's a fair bit of scripted dialog in this section, so we need acting! Sell it with your faces, and give it with your bodies! Questions? Ok, we'll give Adrian a minute to lube up, but hold your places."

The older kids re-assembled, and the girls began working cock and pussy with their mouths. Adrian returned, fully lubed, and resumed his position, sucking on my cock.

"Ok," called the director, "it seems there's no need to call action. Quiet on the set, please," he added softly in response to muffled giggling among the crew. "Ok kids, you're fine. That's action. Just keep it going. And… roll cameras!"

I didn't have to make my barking noise again, but Malcolm had to pretend he heard it. He got up, crossed to the walkway, and climbed the stairs to our position on our walkway. He looked furious, and I felt scared. I guess that was the method they talked about, so I tried to forget I was filming a scene and pretending. Jimmy kept his camera on Malcolm as he ascended.

"Bloody, poncy poofters!" Malcolm yelled in a menacing voice. "Spying on my girls! You'll pay!" He pulled Adrian up by his jacket collar, and he grabbed me by the back of my jacket collar. I could see his biceps bulge as he lifted Adrian to his feet. As planned, I simply stepped out of my shorts and sexy green satin bikini knickers, stumbling just a bit, and walked to the stairs, with Malcolm shaking me gently from time to time. Adrian and I held the handrails on either side as we descended, with Roy following immediately behind us and Jimmy following Roy.

We emerged onto the gym floor, and Malcolm began shaking us again as we walked. I remembered the meanest bullies and how they made me feel. I hung my head and hoped I looked frightened. Adrian had told me once that I shouldn't try to look frightened. The method said that if I felt frightened or remembered feeling frightened, I would look genuinely frightened.

When we arrived near the girls, Malcolm gave an angry grunt and pressed gently into my back. That was my cue to stumble forward a bit and for Adrian to fall and roll a bit. Mr. Koolman told me I could fall if I wanted because we were on a mat, so it wasn't a safety problem. I decided to give it a go because we would be doing more takes anyway, so if it didn't work out, it would be ok.

I leaned forward and turned my shoulders around so I could fall backward. I was facing Malcolm as I fell, still trying to feel frightened.

"I found a couple of poncy pervs watching you girls. Jeanine, get that one out of his shirt and jacket while I take care of this other one, and don't be a pussy about it," said Malcolm. I remembered what I was about to do, and I felt nervous. "He'll have enough pussy before he's done here!"

"Aw, but he's so sweet," said Jeanine.

"Do it!" shouted Malcolm as he placed his foot on my shoulder and shoved me flat on the ground.

"Oh, but Jeanine, ma chérie," said Claire as she rubbed her pussy. "Please 'urry, because zis, ma petite chatte, she is so 'ot and so 'orny!"

Jeanine pulled me by the front of my tie to a seated position. She quickly untied it and pulled it abruptly from my collar. She yanked my jacket down my back, but only to my elbows, keeping me held in a restricted position. I could hear Adrian whimpering in pain and fear, but I couldn't see him. Then Jeanine ripped open the front of my shirt, sending the few buttons flying that had still been fastened. She pulled my shirt down to my elbows as well. "Ok, he's ready," Jeanine told Malcolm.

"Bury his face in Claire's pussy!" said Malcolm. "This little one is mine."

I looked at Claire's wet pussy and felt scared and a little disgusted. "I have to put my face in that?" I asked Jeanine, my first line of the scene.

Jeanine looked at me with an expression of discomfort, maybe even pity, but said in a rough voice, "You're going to do more than that, little boy spy! You're going to eat that pussy!"

Jeanine looked at me one last time, showing a little pity. She grabbed my hair and pulled me toward Claire's pussy. Well, she didn't actually pull me. I walked on my knees while she pretended to pull me, and she pretended well. For my part, I was finished pretending for the scene.

I turned toward Claire's pussy and saw all sorts of horrors. Were there tentacles inside? Worms? Cooties? If I was supposed to eat her pussy, was there something in there like huge boogers that I was supposed to swallow? I was truly frightened and disgusted. I didn't have to act.

Of course, I was very naive back then, but I still don't know why they call it eating pussy. You lick, you suck, you might insert things, or even swallow small amounts of pussy juice if she's really excited, but you don't eat anything.

Just then, I felt Adrian's shorts and undies hit me in the head. I shook them off and said, "Adrian, you ok?" Mr. Koolman told us to ad lib lines, so I thought that was a good one. In response, Adrian let out a loud and desperate grunt, which made it sound like he and Malcolm were grappling.

I looked briefly at Claire's face. She smiled brightly and said, "Oh, such a cute little boy is 'e!" She opened her legs wider and rubbed her clitoris rapidly, making herself moan.

I didn't fancy what I saw at all. Amber's pussy was pretty because it wasn't wide open like this. I didn't have to look at it. The living statue woman's pussy that was wide open seemed harmless because I didn't have to bury my face in it and eat her big pussy boogers. "Oh, please 'urry," she said.

The waiting was suddenly over. When entering a cold swimming pool, it's usually best to jump right in rather than wading in just a bit at a time, trying to get used to it. As the script instructed, Jeanine waited long enough to tease Claire and to keep me in suspense with my head just inches above the smelly pussy. Then she suddenly shoved my face right into it. I could feel everything from my chin to my nose instantly becoming wet and slimy. I could hear Claire making that barking sound, and I felt her thighs close for a moment on my face. I know my feet jumped when this happened because I have since seen the video, but at the time, I didn't notice anything but her slimy pussy goo on my face.

The next thing the script told me to do was to turn my head left and right, keeping my face pressed tightly against Claire's pussy. This way I could breathe while my head was turned to the side, and it would look as if Jeanine was forcing my head into the side-to-side motion, using my face to rub Claire's pussy. Claire moaned loudly, and she thrust her pussy up into my face.

When Claire lowered her hips back to the mat, Jeanine gently pressed on my neck with one finger, using the hand that was holding my hair. This was my cue to make it look as if she were pushing my mouth up toward Claire's clitoris, so I slid into position. I rocked my head up and down to make it look as if Jeanine was shoving my face in and out. I had my mouth wide open over the top part of Claire's pussy, right where there's a bone and a soft area of skin, and my tongue was resting against the top of her pussy, right where her clitoris was.

Jeanine released my hair, and Claire's hand replaced Jeanine's, holding my head gently in position, though I think she made it look forceful. This was my moment. Jeanine's work was done, and I had a job to do now on my own. I felt around Claire's clitoris with my tongue, which seemed to make her squeak and twitch a bit. I took that as a good sign, so I did it again, then again. Before long, her hips were bouncing all over the place, and she was shrieking loudly.

She pulled my head up by the hair and said, "Oh, you naughty, sweet boy! You 'ave never 'ad a girl's pussy, 'ave you?"

I shook my head, feeling the cold, drying pussy juice on my cheeks, and said, "No."

Claire's eyes opened wide as she smiled, saying, "Oh, but then of course, you do not know 'ow to please a girl!"

She put her hands on either side of my head and rubbed her clitoris over my nose, pressing my nose into her pussy on every stroke. She continued this, locking her legs together and squeezing my head on both sides with her thighs. I took this as a cue to nod my head up and down and rub her clitoris with my nose, so I did. She howled and jerked her whole body up, slamming her legs down to the mat. She screeched twice more, and I could feel her pussy juice changing somehow. It seemed to become more watery and more smelly. Her body was shaking like it was out of control, and she grabbed my head and held it still by force. It seemed I had given a girl an orgasm for the first time ever.

"NO! NOOO!!!" screamed Adrian.

"Take it, pussy boy! Take it dry! Or would you rather we use your own blood for lube?"

I felt first one hand stroking my ass, then two. Now it was my turn. Randy had warned me when I was going over the script that morning to pay attention to Claire and let Jeanine take care of my ass. It was most important for me to do my job with Claire's pussy.

But what was my job now? She had already cum. She seemed to like me using my nose, so I did that some more.

She barked, then pulled my head up, so my nose was no longer in her pussy. "You silly boy! You do not know what you are doing with ze pussy! You lick! Use your tongue to make me to be pleasure!"

This was the part I was dreading. This was where I had to eat those huge pussy boogers. I closed my eyes, opened my mouth, and poked my tongue in deep. It actually tasted a bit like boogers, but not nearly as bad as it smelled. I wiggled my tongue around a bit, and Claire gasped. "Yes, little boy," she said, "Zis you 'ave to do if you are to please my pussy."

I kept my tongue in as deep as I could and wiggled it all the way to her clitoris. I tried to tickle her clitoris a little with my tongue, and that made her gasp and thrust her pussy up into my face again. I licked these big, red floppy things on the sides, which she seemed to like, so I sucked one into my mouth and pretended I was giving a boy a nice blowjob.

"Little boy!" she wailed. "You 'ave to learn to be gentle with zis pussy if you wish to please 'er!"

"Gentle?" I thought. "With Claire?" I thought she could be fucked with a tire iron and still cum. Malcolm had been much rougher yesterday than I was being. So I went back to boring licking, which was wearing my tongue out, and which she didn't seem to like anymore. Then I felt my ass cheeks being pulled apart, followed by a tongue swirling its way around it. That has always been such a strange sensation. It tickles, and it feels weird having a tongue in the place where poop comes from. Then she jammed her tongue into my hole, making me groan.

I couldn't pay attention to that. Claire was my project, and I needed to make her cum again. I thought about how much I liked to be licked on my balls and on the area around my cock, so I tried that – licking the area around her pussy. She began to moan, and her body began to writhe when I reached a spot where a thigh muscle seems to join right next to her pussy. I sucked on that for a while, tickling it with my tongue. Then I had a great idea! Jeanine had done this with her the previous day. I licked her clitoris gently to distract her as I slid two of my fingers inside her pussy. She moaned with pleasure this time, and she didn't stop. I tried to tickle her insides with my fingers, but I didn't know which parts were ticklish. In the end, it seemed that all the parts inside her pussy were ticklish. I found I could also lick harder and even suck on her clitoris. She was really moving around now, and it seemed I'd figured out how to do this properly.

"Oh, you sweet boy!" moaned Claire.

"Yes, what a sweet boy!" said Jeanine, just as she pressed her cock into my ass. "How do you like that, sweet boy?" she asked as she slowly pressed it in all the way.

My back arched without me meaning to do it. I moaned, "Oh yes, yes, please, I like it very much," I said, feeling just a bit desperate for some normal fucking.

"Then take it, sweet boy!" She took great strokes and hit my ass hard with her pelvis with each stroke. Her cock was bigger than mine, but not by much. It was long like mine, and just a bit thicker, but not like Boris' or Malcolm's big cocks. She didn't really need to loosen me.

"Owww!!!" I heard Adrian howl. "Oh god, let me go, PLEASE!!!"

Pussy! I had to concentrate on this pussy. I tried fucking her pussy with my fingers, so I moved them in and out to see if that helped. It seemed anything I did right now was going to get her more excited. Then I had another idea. When I'd been fucked in the ass, there was this bump right behind my cock that felt like it was actually the back part of my cock when I came. I decided to poke around behind her clitoris to see if she had something similar. I was in for quite a surprise.

My ass felt so good to have a cock in it again! "Yes please, yes, please fuck me harder, please," I said, momentarily pausing in my clitoris duty. And she did, harder, deeper, and faster.

I growled softly in response to Jeanine's cock as I began to suck on Claire's clitoris, making her howl. Then I reached inside, behind her clitoris, and I felt a small, soft spot on the inside of the bone behind her clitoris. When I tickled that spot, her whole body jumped around in every direction. I bit down around her clitoris and held her left thigh as tightly as I could to hold her in place. She shouted and wailed as I rubbed into that small spot behind her clitoris. I sucked and tickled her clitoris with my tongue. She screamed and shrieked loudly, and she didn't seem likely to stop any time soon. Soon she seemed to wear out physically from all the leaping around, but she continued to howl.

Just then, Malcolm let out a loud howl as well, announcing his orgasm. That left only Jeanine, but I kept working on Claire, who was howling, almost as if from fear. I clenched my ass tight for Jeanine and began to let myself feel how nice it was to be fucked. If I weren't on my belly, the people on the set might have noticed that I was hard as a rock again.

I felt a cruel streak inside of me, and I wanted to keep Claire going. So I slipped a third finger into her pussy and really gave that spot a working over as I continued to suck on her clitoris. She screamed, grabbing my hair and forcing my head into her pussy, and not so gently this time either. All kinds of pussy juice was coming out of her, and I mean it when I say that it didn't taste bad at all. Her screaming was very high-pitched and quite loud. I could feel her stomach muscles clench tight with every sound she made.

Oh, my ass felt good! Jeanine was fucking me harder and harder. I was feeling close to one of those incredible ass-orgasms. I could feel the electricity building. I bit Claire's pussy a little harder, which she seemed to enjoy, but the script said I was not supposed to cum. I couldn't! Forcing Claire into her screaming fits was such a turn-on, though. I could understand the feeling of taking control. I made her scream again to remind myself. Then I clenched my ass muscles and focused on Jeanine, who was also very close to cumming.

I removed my mouth from Claire's pussy and rubbed the top of it. I felt bad about leaving teeth marks. Then I looked back at Jeanine, trying to be afraid, and she had to cum as soon as we made eye contact. She had started shooting cum a few months earlier, so she had to pull out and shoot on my back, and she even managed to hit my face with a small drip.

Then came the hard part. As Jeanine smeared her cum across my back, I had to lay my head sideways on Claire's pussy and look sad because they didn't let me cum. I thought about how it sometimes hurt to think of losing Annie.

"Hold!" called the director. That meant that nobody was allowed to move at all. "Jimmy and Roy, keep rolling, all other studio cams cut, actors, please hold."

Mr. Koolman walked Roy and Jimmy around the five of us exhausted kids, taking close-up shots of us, including my sticky, gooey face with Jeanine's cum dripping onto Claire's pussy. They did close shots, long shots, moving camera shots, shots from all angles, and then two photographers with fancy cameras came out onto the mat and took what felt like 500 still pictures of us, and then maybe another few hundred in different lights. We were exhausted, so none of us really cared that we had to wait, but my face itched as Jeanine's cum dripped down.

"Ok, all cameras cut. Cut scene 4c," said Mr. Koolman. "That was our cover photo right there, our publicity photo. Thank you actors, you may leave the set and clean up."

Jeanine peeled herself off my back, where she had collapsed. Then I slowly pulled my body back, off Claire's poor pussy. She remained flat on the mat. Malcolm had stood up and was helping Adrian to his feet. I saw Adrian's face and back were covered with cum too; only it looked as though Malcolm had smeared it over Adrian's face with his hand.

Malcolm and Jeanine helped Claire to her feet, and we all began hugging. Before I realized it, Adrian and I were hugging in the middle of the other three. and all three of them were rubbing their bodies in the cum on our bodies, making a cum mess on all of us. "Bit of a tradition," said Adrian.

We stood there celebrating what we knew was a very good scene, kissing each other many times, long kisses, deep kisses, messy kisses, and kisses with people I'd never kissed before. Well, Malcolm anyway, who said, "You're fuckin brilliant! It's all true. I thought yesterday was a fluke, with you being so good and all, but you were far better today! I hope they gave you a brilliant contract, because you're worth every penny, new boy, that and more!"

"Ok, reset for scene 4c people, let's reset for 4c, fluff call, FSP's check-in with your actors. Lights, complete reset for 4c, lights. Sound, checks only sound. Makeup and wardrobe, complete reset. We need all makeup and clean costumes. Cameras reset position and check focus, position and focus cameras. We are at twenty minutes. This is a twenty-minute break until reshoot scene 4c."

"Twenty minutes," we all mumbled from the stage.

"How the fuck are we gonna shoot that bloody scene again? We're bloody spent!" complained Malcolm to the rest of us as we began our walk to the fluff area.

***

Annie gave me a big, messy embrace and licked some of Jeanine's cum from my face before kissing me. "We better get you to a shower," he said.

He led me by the hand to one of several shower stalls in the fluff area. He looked carefully at my hair before putting a shower cap on me and another on himself. "No cum in your hair, so this will save blow-drying for the second take."

He turned the shower to a nice warm temperature before we stepped in. He kissed me, and it seemed as though every move he made to clean my body was a sensual, loving caress. In a way, I think it was. I spread my legs and bent over, holding a rail while he cleaned out my ass, though he said it was already perfectly clean, so he licked it for a minute or so.

Esmeralda, the manager of the laundry service at the studio who had worked on stage 7 with me the previous morning and who ran the undies game in the tea room, was at the ready in front of the showers handing out towels, two for each of us. I stood still while Annie thoroughly dried every inch of my tired body. He gave me a clean towel to carry with me before drying himself off.

We claimed our space on a mattress in the fluff area and began snogging again. It occurred to me that I had no real reason to be tired. I hadn't topped anyone in that shoot. I hadn't cum. In fact, I'd been teased by Jeanine! But now that it was over, I was simply exhausted.

"That's because you share the energy of the ones you're with," said Annie. "Especially Claire, in this scene. She couldn't really breathe for the last ten minutes of that shoot. I don't know what you were doing to her, luv, but she was out of control. I mean completely. I've never seen her like that. You put her in that state, and you kept her there. You felt it. Of course, you're exhausted, sweetie."

"I really wanted to cum from Jeanine fucking me," I said, "but the script says I can't, and think of poor Adrian! He keeps having to shoot these scenes where he can't cum either."

Annie cuddled me close and said with a wink, "Accidents sometimes happen, though. We're boys, not eunuchs. Just make a show of it as if you're trying not to cum, or that your pleasure is actually pain, and try not to make a show of it when you do cum. Do you really believe Adrian didn't cum just then? The director knows, and so does everybody else, and no one cares as long as the scene looks right. And he still gets the not-cumming-on-camera bonus!"

"The sly dog!" I said. "Good for him. It'll be nice having everybody pay attention to someone else for a change."

***

"All right," said Mr. Koolman. "I know we gave you all twenty minutes, but I have something very important to announce. I need everybody to be here. Is everybody here? Claire? Has anyone seen Claire?"

"She's here Sir," called out Nurse Dan. "She needs a lie down. She's fine."

"Ok, can you hear me, Claire, hunny?"

"I 'ere you," she said in a tired voice.

"Great. Anybody else? Are we all here?" Mr. Eastman entered the stage area at that moment but remained in the background. "Ah, excellent! We have Mr. Eastman also joining us for this very important announcement. Ok, Judine says everybody is here, so let me begin by saying what an incredible take that was! St. Felix Academy, scene 4c was simply mind-blowing in every way possible!

"Before we began on 4c, I reminded our new boy Trevor, a child porn prodigy if ever there was one, that he had given us two brilliant performances in 4b, and I asked if we dared hope for a third in 4c. I think we have his answer."

Cheers and applause, once again, rang out across the stage. A very soft, high-pitched scream could be heard from the nursing station. "My dear, Claire, you have nothing to worry about. You and your responses to Trevor have made this scene the highlight of the next Willy Awards; you can count on it. I predict great success at the Willies for St. Felix academy, including best picture, best scene for scene four, best new actor for Trevor, easily, and after her performance in scene 4, dare I suggest Claire for best actress? And you folks on stage might not realize the extraordinary technical and artistic wizardry that goes on backstage. Once it's edited, this film will surely be a lock for many more Willies. We have the best sound and light departments by far of any child porn studio. We hire only Willy- or BAFTA-winning composers, whom the other studios cannot afford, to score our films. Why? Because excellence brings success, success brings revenue, and revenue brings the resources required for excellence!

"My apologies, though. I have strayed from my point. You all know the rule here at Frenetic Studios that each take must be repeated at least once. Well, I had a talk with Mr. Eastman just now. I showed him some of the video roughs from take one. I told him how everyone on this production has given everything they had, especially the actors in 4c, and that it would, in my opinion, be asking too much for Claire here, and the other exhausted talent, to do a retake of such an extraordinary scene, especially as we are close to running over on time. Mr. Eastman has concurred with each point, and I am therefore proud to announce, thanks to Mr. Eastman, and thanks to the hard work of each of you in this room, including you FSPs who often get left out, that's a wrap for St. Felix Academy! We are done here in the studio! Thank you to everybody, each one of you!"

The last two sentences were drowned out by the tumultuous cheering, which came from everywhere except us actors in the fluff area and Claire in the Nursing station, who all gave a sigh of relief as we sank deeper into our waking comas.

"We expect the film to be released by the end of the month," he continued. "I will see you all at the release party!"

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