Chapter 41
Special

"I want more boys," I moaned to Randy as we walked back to the outdoor playground set. "Being fucked by you and those men was fun, that whole gangbang thing, but I'm tired of girls, and especially women." For the first time that week, making porn had begun to feel like work, and as a boy of eight, nearly nine, I didn't feel like working.

"I'm a boy, and I'm gay," I continued. "Can't we find more boys for my promo? Wouldn't it be better to have more boys around if this is supposed to help sell my videos to people who like boys?"

"It's not quite that simple," he said. "You need to remember, Hawk, that you are the star, and you are the one we want people to pay attention to in this promo video. If you are surrounded by other cute, sexy boys, you will have competition. If you are surrounded by men and women, or girls, you are the only boy in the shot, and everyone will look at you. Your films will be different, but this is your promo shoot, so we have to bear that in mind."

It had been a long day, and I was tired and still feeling uneasy about what had just happened with Trish and Lena. I was becoming crabby. That scene was Randy's idea, not mine. I didn't want to do it in the first place! It was my turn to be boss again.

"I don't care," I said. "It's time for boys now. I'm sick of crazy girls and big men and nasty women!" I stopped walking, faced Randy, and said very loudly, "I'm only doing boys, or else I quit! What will you do then, if your new star doesn't take an elephant trunk up his ass or whatever you want me to do next? You won't have a bloody film then, will you!"

I stopped suddenly. What had I just said? Randy got down on one knee and looked me in the eye with a kind smile. I think he understood. My cock was sore, I was tired, and I could still smell the nasty woman goo on my arm, even after a shower with lots of soap. I just wanted a nice boy to cuddle with and play gently. I needed something nice, but I was asking for it by shouting at Randy. I'd said I would quit! Now I was the one trying to take away my new life!

"Hawk," said Randy in a very gentle voice, "we are all done filming for today, if that's how you feel. We have plenty of material for your promo film. You know that you can always say no to any of these scenes. I wish you had said no earlier though. You sound a little upset, and I think it's better if you call a hold before you feel this way instead of after."

"I know," I said. "It's just hard to remember that, and I want to try new things. After my scene with Claire, I don't know if something will be nasty before I do it, and everything feels weird and different anyway. It's difficult for me to know when something is more than just weird or different. I'm trying to do everything, and I guess I'll get better in time knowing when to hold."

He paused as if considering his next words carefully. "I had something special in mind for the last scene, and I'm going to show you my idea anyway in a little bit. It's not because I want to persuade you to work when you don't want to. It's because, after you see what I'm talking about, I don't think you will let any of us leave until we've finished filming the scene." I hugged him. I loved him, and I hated that I'd shouted at him again, but at least I hadn't made him cry this time.

***

Randy and I took a break. I sat on his lap on a bench in the outdoor set, and he told the camera operators they could have a break too until 3:30.

"I didn't mean it, Randy," I said. "I love my job! I would never quit like that! Honest!"

"I know, Hawk," he said, hugging me. "You've had a very busy day, and maybe you're tired after all that sex. People sometimes say things they don't mean when they're tired. I meant what I said though. We are all done filming for today if you'd like to stop, and if you're not sure, then I think we should stop anyway.

"But I still want you to see what I have in mind for a last scene before you decide. I think you will wake up and be quite happy with it, and it will make you feel a lot better." He held me quietly, and I think I'd just nodded off to sleep when…

"Is Trevor Boy for sleep on job?"

Boris had gone for a stroll while I was with Lena and Trish, but he was back, and he was not alone. He was with Sebastian and…

"Annie!" I shouted as I hopped off Randy's lap and ran to him. "Annie! I love you!" We wrapped our arms around each other and kissed a slow kiss of love.

"And Sebastian of liver have been for chop, hell?" asked Sebastian, wearing an impish smile. I didn't understand at all what he meant, but I knew how happy I was to see him. I turned from Annie and I hugged and kissed Sebastian. His hair was different. It was still pretty long, but he'd had it styled differently.

"Want for something new for hair," he said. "Is very pretty, no? Trevor boy like?"

I didn't like it. I never liked it when people I knew changed their hair. Haircuts were something that other kids made fun of at Preston Primary, so it had been over a year since I'd had one. (Mum was content not having to bother with my hair.) And when someone I knew got their hair colored or styled differently, they didn't look like the same person anymore. I wished I could have told them I liked the way they looked before, and that they didn't need to change it. But I loved Sebastian a lot, so I told him, "Yeah, it's very pretty. It… makes your eyes look brighter." That was n't really a lie. He was still pretty, so his hair must be pretty too.

"Like change for hair much time," he said. "Give change for viewer, like different boy sometime."

I really wanted to talk to him about stretching my ass and throat, but I had to say hi to Boris. I hugged and kissed him too, saying, "Thank you for helping me with my promo shoot. It's good that you left when you did though. That last scene got sort of nasty."

He chuckled and flashed that adorable smile of his that always made his eyes so beautiful. He said, "Lena and Trish nasty for woman sex, very nasty. Want for nasty things, not stop ever. Trap boys in pussies, and Trevor Boy not escape always."

"Well," I said, "I guess I'm glad I tried it, but I don't want to see the inside of another woman's pussy again ever!" That wasn't entirely true. I was still curious about why most boys liked pussy, even grown women's pussy, and I knew I'd be exploring more. (I'd hoped with Yvgenia though.) But I certainly never wanted my whole arm up a woman's ass again. It wasn't the pussy or the ass that was nasty, just… the whole thing, I guess.

"Woman only?" asked Boris. "Girl ok?"

"I like boys," I said loudly, "but, ok, I've met some girls who are nice, and they like to feel good too, just like boys do. I like to make them feel nice. It's just like playing with them. They're fun to play with, and it's nice to make them happy," I stepped over to Annie and put my arm around him, "but I would much rather be with a proper boy like Annie." I kissed him.

Annie was wearing short, baggy, pink cotton shorts, a white tank top with a pink daisy on the front, and pink trainers. Boris was still naked, and Sebastian was too. I wondered if he thought it was easier to have his medical exams without having to get undressed. I held Annie close. The effect of those soft cotton shorts made his slender, elegant, tan, bare legs look and feel even softer. I had to have a rub and another kiss.

Holding Annie like this and being around Boris and Sebastian, all boys, made me feel even more uneasy about what I had just done with Trish and Lena. Maybe I wasn't so glad I'd tried it? It was almost as if I'd forgotten who I was. I had promised nearly everybody that I would say something or yell "Hold!" as loud as I could if I felt uncomfortable with what was happening. But then again it wasn't all bad.

I learned in the limo two nights earlier that I liked commanding people and acting like their master. Maybe I just needed to command Lena and Trish to do something that didn't involve my fists in their holes. I hoped Randy was right, that one day we could sell that scene for a lot of money. I learned a lesson, and it hadn't cost me much, a bit of uneasiness is all. But it seemed even my mistakes could make me a lot of money in this new life of mine!

This seemed like as good a time as any to tell Sebastian about my concerns. "Sebastian, you know how you can fit just about anything in your ass? And how you can deep throat a huge cock, balls-deep?"

"Trevor Boy need wait for experience," he replied. "Can do much big cock after practice for long time."

"But that's just it," I said. "I don't seem to need practice. I just did a small sort of gangbang with some of the men actors, and even the biggest cock felt good in my ass. It didn't hurt at all, once I was stretched and relaxed. It felt great! And I could get all of them into my throat easily, even the biggest one, and it was really big. I shouldn't be able to do that, should I? Did I break something inside of me?"

Annie squeezed me tightly, looking startled and maybe even afraid at these words. Sebastian looked at me with his mouth hanging open. "Is true?" He asked. "Trevor Boy have ass and throat like Sebastian? Who is actor have biggest cock?"

"I don't know his name," I replied. "I guess I should know someone's name when I have sex with him. He was really big. Very tall and loads of muscles."

"It was Peter Piston," said Randy with a proud smile.

Sebastian's mouth fell open even farther. "Peter Piston fuck for Trevor Boy?" he asked with apparent amazement. "Also deep throat for him?"

"Well, yeah," I said, "but not all the way balls-deep. It felt like I could have done, but I was afraid I was going to hurt myself. It wasn't painful, but I was scared. It was too easy, and that didn't seem right."

"Trevor Boy very unusual," said Sebastian. "You not believe for Sebastian, but think we two have same thing for ass and for throat. Saw Dr. Gupta after hair done today. Had scene for morning with Baron, then lunch we show for Trevor Boy how Baron cock fit inside Sebastian. Dr. Gupta make many test for Sebastian ass. Use for most bigger probe, none bigger, and see go in easy. Then take out, see for gape, scratch for anus, and see how fast anus close. Do other test, many test, check for strong anus. Dr. Gupta much surprise. Say for Sebastian have strange condition for ass and for throat. Have complicated name, but simple name is call by letters IAH."

"IAH?" I said with surprise. "He said something about that to Nurse Blaine during my exam this morning! I didn't know what it meant, and I didn't ask him. It sounded like doctor-talk that I wouldn't understand."

"Well, doctor tell for me IAH is for throat stretch open much and ass and rectum stretch open much, and say all of guts also stretch open much. He speak for many doctor at conference, decide this is condition, but very, very rare. Is no serious problem, but can make for problem with shit constipate. Most with IAH have only constipate, so treat for that, but we porn boys have big cock in ass, big cock in throat, many time. Only see for stretch in porn actor, but most not see doctor. Most porn actor make movie, think this no is problem, only talent, so not see doctor. Very few, we with IAH. Very few. He say maybe one person for five hundred southand, maybe even million. Very few, and most think is no problem, so not see doctor. Make hard for know how many. Doctor say if have enema often, is no problem, but must eat rough food for shit not constipate. You know what mean rough food?"

"Did he say 'roughage?'" asked Randy.

"That word, yes," said Sebastian.

"That means dietary fiber," said Randy. "The dieticians here will help you to understand what foods will be best if you need more fiber. Hawk, you should go with Sebastian to see the dietician, just in case you really do have the same condition. I think we should assume you do, because you are just like Sebastian was in his early days. He could take in unusually large cocks without pain, and no one knew why. He was just our special Sebastian with the magic ass," he said with a smile and a kiss for Sebastian.

"I will drop by the clinic while you boys are at tea and see what they have to say about this IAH thing. I've never heard of it, and if Dr. Gupta thinks you both have it, we need to learn more about it. It must be safe for work because Dr. Gupta signed both of your releases for normal work, with unlimited extreme bottoming still approved for Sebastian."

***

I held Annie's hand and walked him over to the wooden stairs on the playground set where I'd taken Hannah's virginity maybe an hour earlier. I asked him to sit on my lap. I put my hand on his lap. No, it was his thigh. It was soft and incredible. Touching it felt magical, so it was his thigh. My cock started to harden again, but it still felt sore. I knew that I wouldn't even notice the soreness when I was inside him.

I kissed Annie and told him I'd missed him during the day, and that I just wanted to hold him. It was as if I was resetting my mind. He reached around my neck and hugged me in silence, slightly rocking from side to side. I was reminding myself that this was who I loved, and this was what love felt like. The four people around me were pure love. I wanted to hold onto that feeling so I could remember it more clearly next time I tried something silly that felt uncomfortable.

***

A few minutes later, the camera operators returned, and Randy explained his special plan for my last promo scene. It would be all boys. In fact, it would be all boys I knew and loved. It would be with Boris, Sebastian, and Annie! It was nothing extravagant, just the Russian boys and me playing together, then Annie steps in, and I forget Boris and Sebastian. Those two had already worked onscreen with Annie, but I hadn't. This would be my first scene with him, which made me nervous for about two seconds. Then I kissed him again, and all was well.

I wanted love and touch with Annie more than sex, which felt weird to me. Randy thought a scene with me making love instead of having sex would be a great way to finish my promo film, and there was no one more perfect than Annie for such a scene. It also felt like a wonderful way to finish a very strange and emotional day at my new job. Randy was right. No one was going home until this scene was finished!

***

Some stagehands had set up lawn furniture in the area where we were shooting, including two chaise lounges side by side in front of some trees, near the wooded area where the bouncy castle had been set up. Roy zoomed in on my head and shoulders, on my right side, and I turned toward his camera and said, "I have made some friendships through child porn at Frenetic that are precious, and I will keep them forever."

He zoomed out to show I was kneeling astride Sebastian's head. He was lying on his back on a blanket, sucking my cock. Then I leaned forward, revealing Boris kneeling astride Sebastian's hips, and I began to suck Boris' great cock. I deep throated him right away. It seemed to be the thing to do that day.

I straightened my lower body and began to fuck Sebastian's mouth. He responded by moaning and caressing my ass and thighs. (He always knew I liked that!) At the same time, I pulled Boris' right hand to the back of my head to keep my deep throat blow job going. It was hard to coordinate myself. Face fucking one boy while deep throating another isn't simple. There are a lot of things to pay attention to. Boris and Sebastian helped me though.

Roy concentrated his camera on my face and Boris' cock, and the woman kept her camera on Sebastian's face and my cock, occasionally backing off for wider group shots. Roy went back for one wide shot in particular that showed Annie walking into view, looking so lovely it… well, it almost hurt, except I was too happy to hurt at that moment. He was smiling so prettily at me. The woman's camera caught me turning my head to see Annie's approach, my huge, bright smile (which I assure you was not acting), and me letting Boris' cock flop out of my mouth without my seeming to notice.

"Annie!" I called, pulling my cock from Sebastian's mouth with a popping sound. I ran to him, with Roy covering me from the right rear, and the woman covering my face from the right front as I ran.

Roy held on a close-up as we kissed, and the woman got whole body shots of our kissing. Of course I groped his ass and soft, elegant thighs. I'm only human. He pulled his tank top off as we were kissing. I slid his soft shorts down his even softer legs, and he stepped out of them. We left his cute panties on for the time being. They were white cotton with pink lace trim. Neither his shorts nor his panties were designed to look sexy, just casual girls' wear. But on Annie, I thought everything looked sexy, and the soft cotton made him feel even softer and sexier.

We walked back to Boris and Sebastian, who was on his knees sucking Boris' cock, though not deep-throating him. I guessed correctly that he was allowing me to be the star by not deep-throating Boris, though we all knew he could do a much better job of it than I could. Maybe my throat could stretch, but I was still very inexperienced. This was still only my third day in child pornography, and before that, the only sex I'd ever had was with Brad and his friends when I was six.

Annie kissed Boris, and we both stood next to him, groping his ass. After a few minutes, I walked Annie to one of the chaise lounges, and both cameras followed us. I didn't really notice what they were doing. It didn't matter. Only Annie's kiss mattered. At some point though, we ended our kiss, and I sat sideways on the chaise lounge, leaving Annie standing between my knees, facing me.

I kissed his bulge through his soft, cotton panties. Then I looked up at him with a smile as I lowered his panties to the middle of his thighs and sucked his cock. After deep-throating so many big man-sized cocks that day, there was a sweetness about Annie's little boy cock that I really liked. It was small, but it made him feel just as good as those bigger cocks made the men feel. In fact, it seemed to do a lot more for Annie. He was gasping and grunting a lot, but the men had acted cool, almost uninterested. I could do a lot more with my tongue too because I had room in my mouth to move it around. That made me feel good too. I couldn't deep throat Annie like I did those men (he wasn't long enough), but there was a lot more I could do with him, and he loved it!

Annie spread his legs just a bit so his panties would stay in place, leaving my hands free to feel their way around his ethereal skin. I looked up when I could, but he had his head thrown back much of the time. That's ok though because the woman captured his face in several shots, when she wasn't doing full body shots, and the look on Annie's face is so lovely and pretty that sometimes I wonder how I feel about other people even seeing it.

Normally, Annie's fans only get to see his performing face. He had this same face when we were in my dressing room the previous day when Boris was fucking him while Sebastian was sucking him. It was beautiful. It wasn't his show face. It was Annie. My Annie, who loved me.

I could hear the Russian boys on the chaise lounge behind me, but I didn't care what they were doing. I only cared about feeling Annie's body, and using those feelings to make him feel even better. Then I pulled his cock out of my mouth and turned him around. He let his panties fall and bent his body over while I tongued his ass.

Roy kept a close-up on my face and Annie's ass while the woman went to get some footage of the Russian boys. Roy cut filming for a minute when Randy handed me the cherry-flavored lube. I smeared it into and around Annie's hole, and then all over my cock. I wiped my hands off on a towel Randy had also brought out. Roy resumed filming when Randy left. He filmed me more as I licked the excess cherry lube from around Annie's ass, which looked like a continuation from his previous shot. Then I turned my body to slouch back onto the chaise, and Annie straddled my torso, kissing me as he lowered his ass easily onto my cock, without taking time to open up. That's because my cock was still a slender boy cock, and anyone can take a little boy cock without needing to be stretched first, even other little boys. His cock was right in front of my face because of my slouching position, but I couldn't quite reach it to suck it.

It was so easy to fuck Annie's hole. Yes, my cock was longer than an average eight year-old boy's (almost nine), but it was still usually awkward to fuck another boy unless that boy knew how to position himself, and Annie was a pro. He rode my cock slowly at first, shivering at times, but soon he rode me like a boy possessed, and all I could feel in my body was his wild energy in my cock and on my lips, with a vague awareness of his cock rubbing into my belly.

My cock was not sore anymore, or if it was, it was unimportant. But in my mind and in my heart, I felt more love at that moment than I had ever felt before, and that's a very powerful feeling. I held him closer and tighter. I think I looked like I was crying as I threw my head back to scream as I came, and I mean scream! Roy was in a very tight close-up on my face at that moment. Annie kept going because he was close to cumming as well. He was rubbing his cock against my chest as he slid his ass up and down. Of course, I'd lost control of my body by then. Annie was riding me right through that explosive orgasm, which is really easy to see in the woman's long shots of us. I still get very emotional when I watch that video.

Soon Annie came as well, and I held him tight. He was not going to fuck me through my orgasm and then stop once he hit it himself! I kept fucking his ass and trying to rub his cock into my my chest, but it wasn't working quite as well.

When we'd settled down, I looked up and saw tears in his eyes. I hugged him tightly, and then kissed him. I no longer felt alone in my feelings for him. He loved me as much as I loved him. I felt it. I knew it. I began to tear up as well. The two camera operators seemed to notice this, and they moved on to film Boris and Sebastian, who were making a great deal of noise of their own. The camera operators were experienced professionals, and they seemed to know when it was time to let us actors have our private moments. We never had to ask. Randy dashed out to see if we were ok, having gotten some sort of signal from Roy. He hugged us together, and he gave us each an end of a clean towel so we could mop our eyes and blow our noses. Annie and I giggled and kissed as Randy dashed off.

We waited for the camera operators to return before I pulled my cock out of Annie's ass, and we gave them a loving smile and a kiss for the end of the scene. (It was also our way of thanking them for letting us be alone.) They returned to film the last bit of Boris' scene with Sebastian. They were in the same position Annie and I had been in, which surprised me. Sebastian was usually a bit more extreme than that. When Boris was ready, Sebastian went down to take Boris' second load of the day into his mouth. As we'd done earlier in the live show, they did it fairly cleanly, with only a small drip left on Sebastian's face.

Annie and I stepped over to Boris and Sebastian, and we all kissed each other. I got to Sebastian first and licked that yummy drip of Boris' cum from his cute cheek, which of course sent him into those adorable Sebastian giggles. Then I turned to Roy's camera and said, "This is why I love making child porn. When we work here, it's always about the love." Group hug.

One thing was missing though. Sebastian had not cum yet. So we employed the Frenetic tradition, and Sebastian lay with Randy on the towel for a good, hard fuck while Boris, Annie, Roy, the woman camera operator, and I all caressed his body with our hands. This time I looked at Sebastian's face and watched closely to see his genuine expression when he came off-camera. I couldn't help myself. I had to kiss his cute, lovely, honest, and sexy face all over as he was cumming! His face was so sincere and so full of love and gratitude, and so soft and small, not a hint of that on-camera craziness, just like the very first time in Randy's sitting room only a few days ago. He was an ordinary boy whom I loved, having a great orgasm. He was so sweet.

***

"Adrian lives here too?"

Room 46 was huge! There were frescoes above the windows, and residents had their portrait paintings hanging behind their beds, above their walk-in closet doors. I learned that sheet, duvet, and lace colors were a kind of code for a person's gender and sexual preference, though really everyone played with everyone. I would learn that a lot of sex went on in the dorm rooms.

Chapter 42
Accommodations

We still had a full hour before tea. Boris and Sebastian said they had something they needed to do, and they would see us at tea. I think they just wanted to give Annie and me some time together. I asked Randy if we could show Annie the apartments and dorms. I'd mostly decided what I wanted to do already, and I'd hoped to make my plans known that same afternoon, but I wanted to talk it over with Annie first. In my mind, he would figure greatly into my living plans.

I know today that I was expecting far too much from Annie. There is no way a nine year-old and a nearly-nine year-old could possibly have an idea what life together would mean. I still don't know whether it's right to say we were in love at that time, but my feelings for him were the most powerful force in my life. Of all the amazing things that were happening, Annie's love seemed the most real. It was the most solid anchor I had to my new reality. I couldn't bear the thought of life without him, and every joy offered by heaven was mine when I was with him. What are you supposed to call that when you're so young? How should I have thought about him? I still don't really understand the difference between "loving" somebody and "being in love with" somebody, except that being in love seems to mean you love them more, or you love them specially, as an equal, and you want them to love you in return, and you want it to be that way forever. That was how I felt about Annie, and it was how he felt about me. Feelings are very strong when you're eight, nearly nine, and little hearts can break. I think it was a dangerous thing we were doing. But what should I have done? Could anyone act differently, even as adults, when they feel that way about someone? Should they?

***

I was most excited about living in a big dorm room. It felt like quite a risk to move in with a whole bunch of strangers, because if this were Preston Primary, I would expect none of them to like me, and I would be in for a terrible time. But all of the kids I'd met so far at Frenetic had been nothing but loving wonderfulness, including Yvgenia, whose mixed dorm room I'd hoped to join, and from whom I'd hoped to learn more about sex with girls.

Boris, Sebastian, and Annie all disliked sex with girls, but they'd all done it many times in front of the camera. They all played with girls sometimes too. They knew what they were doing. I didn't, and Yvgenia seemed very nice. I thought she would be a good teacher. She wasn't allowed to perform or even fluff because of her diabetes or because of the emotional problems caused by her diabetes, so I thought she probably wanted to have sex with someone. And who knew what the other roommates would be like? Maybe Yvgenia could show me how to do things on her, and the other roommates could watch and help me do it better? But I also hoped there would be boys. Lots of boys.

Randy, Annie, and I walked to the children's dormitory building. We were all naked after shooting my promo video, but part of me wished Annie was still wearing that simple, soft summer outfit we'd removed during the scene. It had been sent to the laundry as soon as we'd finished the scene, though it couldn't have been very dirty. A part of me did not want to become accustomed to seeing him naked. Then it would feel more special when he actually was, or when he undressed just for me. But Annie was a porn star in his own right, which meant he was always naked and being fucked for the whole world to see, just like me.

I had a brief panic. What if Annie wasn't real? What if he was just being nice? What if he just liked me a lot but loved someone else? Would seeing him naked make other boys want to take him from me? Annie was too good to be true! I stopped for a second, feeling a sharp, intense fear. I turned toward Annie and said, "I love you Annie, more than anyone ever could!" Then I kissed him and hugged him while Randy busied himself with a potted plant along the walkway.

When we finished our kiss, I said, "I just want you to know that. Make sure you always remember that, ok?" Annie looked at me a bit uneasily, and then broke into a smile and nodded before kissing me again. We entered the children's dorm building.

There were two suited security officers at the door and an attendant at the front desk. When Randy and I had done our tour earlier, I hadn't seen an actual room with eight beds. Since I was the one who wanted to visit again, Randy gestured me toward the attendant. "How may I help you, Sir?" she asked with a smile.

"Um… I met this girl who lives in a room with eight boys and girls together, and I was wondering if we could go see that room, 'cause I think I'd like to move in there if I can. She was really nice, and her name is Yvgenia. That's not a Greek name. It's Russian. She said it was room number forty-six please."

"Certainly," she said with another smile, politely suppressing a giggle. "I'll call someone to show you up. You can have drinks and snacks in the lobby while you wait, if you like. It's nearly tea."

We sat in the lobby, and a server asked if we would care for drinks. "Oh Trevor!" said Annie. "Mum showed me this new drink, and I think you'll like it." He said to the server, "I would like a Grenadine and soda with a twist of lime please. Would you like to try one, Hawk Boy?" I blushed at his use of my ever-changing personal nickname and nodded. "Two of them, please," he added.

"Scotch and water for me," said Randy. The server returned with our drinks in less than a minute. Randy handed him some money, and the man briefly bowed his head in thanks.

"You kids don't have to worry about tipping," Randy told us, "but it's rather expected of us adults. And don't feel bad about not tipping them." He had read my look correctly. "When they serve drinks to kids, it's noted on the drinks ticket. The company pays them a generous tip on your behalf for each drink they serve you, so they like serving you kids. The people in charge here at Frenetic don't want you to have too many ways to spend your money while you're here. Most of you haven't had money before, and it takes time to learn how to handle money responsibly."

That's what people had been telling me again and again. I had a growing suspicion that something was going to happen to my… £60,000 or whatever it was in bonuses and tip money. That wasn't the same kind of thing I spoke with Linda about though. It was more of a question, and whether they were going to let me try to handle so much money or to protect it from me. I had no idea how much money that was, and I really didn't know anything about keeping it safe. The drink Annie had suggested was delicious!

***

"Mr. Hawk," said the man who had escorted Randy and me on our tour that morning, "so very good to see you back again. I'm told you've expressed an interest in a mixed eight-bed room?" The man led us to an open elevator. He pressed the button for the fourth floor, and the doors closed. "We have four rooms with eight beds," the man said. "One of them is for girls only, and another is exclusively for boys. The remaining two are for boys and girls together. I understand you prefer a mixed room?"

"That's what I want," I said. "Number forty six please."

"Oh, I see you have put some thought into this already, Sir," he said as the elevator doors opened. "Please step this way." He led us through a double door to a room on the right.

The sight that greeted us was far more than I'd expected. The room was huge. Eight king-size beds zigzagged into the room, four on the left and four on the right. Just inside the room, there were doors on the left and the right. The ceiling must have been at least sixteen feet high. It looked at least as high as the ceilings in the accessory tower, only this ceiling was adorned with paintings of scenes from children's stories, featuring naked children, of course.

The panels with the ceiling paintings were almost like skylights. They were semi-transparent, which let in a lot of light during the daytime and made them glow like twelve big television screens. The upper part of the back wall was covered with three paintings, which I later learned were called frescoes, and there were three large windows with satin curtains below the frescoes. Behind each bed was a door, which I already knew led to a huge walk-in closet with a makeup table. An ornate full-length mirror and a fancy wooden chair sat on either side of each closet door.

Above each closet door was a large painting of a naked boy or girl, either with or without the matching parts. One boy had a pussy, but he was clearly a boy, and one girl had a cock. Gender can be a confusing thing for many people, but it seemed natural to me to meet people at Frenetic with bodies of one sex but personalities of the opposite gender. (Randy had explained to me that at Frenetic, gender meant whether someone was a boy or a girl on the inside, and their sex meant whether they had a boy's body or a girl's. Gender was important when you got to know someone, but their sex was important for casting decisions.) And there was everything in-between, like Annie. He was a boy inside, and he had a boy's body, but he could be very girlish in the way he acted, and of course, he always dressed in girl clothes. Even I was somewhere in-between. I'd always known I was a boy, and I had a boy's body, but I'd discovered that I really liked being pretty too, and sometimes I liked being girly in other ways. I learned not to concern myself with the details, but it could be a challenge remembering who wanted to be called he or she. In my first week with Annie, I called him "her" or "she" more than a few times (and I've even made that mistake a few times as I write this memoir), but it never seemed to upset him. He never corrected me either.

I noticed the girls' portrait paintings had pink backgrounds, and the boys' had blue. I looked closely at the painting above the last closet door on the left, and the girl looked familiar. It was a painting of Yvgenia! She was pretty in person, but she somehow looked unusually sexy for a girl in this painting. I didn't think girls were sexy, but that painting somehow showed her in a different way.

Then, next to Yvgenia's painting, I saw a painting of an older-looking girl who had pubic hair trimmed in a neat strip going straight up from her clitoris. (I know words like that now, but when I was nearly nine and still very new to porn, I wouldn't have known how to describe it.) I wondered if that was Jillian, the girl who was moving to an apartment in the adult building.

Farther down the row of paintings, next to the older girl, was the small boy with black hair and glasses who had shown me his almost comically huge circumcised cock, and who's working name was Shlong O. That made me smile. He was very nice to let me see and touch his cock so I could learn about circumcision. I knew another roommate would be my friend.

At the end of the row, to my astonishment, was a painting of Adrian! "Adrian lives here too?" I asked the man who was showing us the room.

"Indeed he does," the man said. "I see you've spotted his painting. We find paintings to be a more pleasant way of marking our residents' beds than simple name tags. It also helps residents in a way to get to know each other." Why hadn't I noticed this in the other rooms I'd visited that morning? I'd seen there were paintings, but I didn't look at them closely or anything.

On the opposite wall, there was a painting of a black girl, probably a teenager, an Asian ladyboy, definitely a teenager, and then two more boys, maybe eleven or twelve, each with blond hair and blue eyes. One of the boys had a pussy. I wondered if these were the brothers that Yvgenia had mentioned, the ones who were considering moving into an apartment.

Aside from the fact that one had a pussy and the other had a cock, the Harlow brothers looked very similar, but something about them bothered me. Something about their paintings made them look like bullies, especially the boy with the penis. I know Frenetic would never hire kids who bullied other kids, but something inside me made me glad to think they might not be coming back to room 46.

Each bed was flanked on its right side by an end table with three drawers. On the backside of each headboard was a bookshelf. There was also a small sliding door on each headboard. It opened to one of the shelves on the other side. The man showing us around said that was where most kids kept their lube, toys, and clean towels. That way they could reach it easily without getting out of bed. Each bed also had a sort of wooden storage trunk at the foot that also served as a bench.

The beds were all done up with satin sheets and pillowcases, which usually matched the colors of the duvets, which were also satin with a lace covering. I didn't realize until Annie giggled softly, but the thought of sliding under those satin sheets with my naked body was giving me a stiffy. Annie kissed me and gave my cock a tug, and we both shared a giggle openly. I was no longer embarrassed to be seen with a boner.

The pink and blue duvets had either light blue, light pink, or white lace on them. The boy with the pussy had pink sheets and a blue duvet with light blue lace. His was the only duvet that didn't match his sheets. The boy next to him had blue sheets and duvet with white lace. The black girl's bed was done in pink, and her duvet was covered with white lace. The ladyboy had pink sheets and a pink duvet with white lace. Yvgenia's bed was done in pink with white lace, and the teenage girl's bed was pink with pink lace. Schlong O's bed was done in blue with white lace, and Adrian's bed was blue with pink lace.

I learned that these color schemes were an expression of both gender and sexual preference. (Biological sex was clear from the paintings.) Blue sheets and duvets meant the person was a boy, and pink was for girls. I learned later that the boy with the pussy had pink sheets and a blue duvet because he wasn't sure if he was really a boy or just a very butch girl, though he was living mostly as a boy, and he'd chosen a blue background for his portrait painting.

The laces on the duvet were for sexual preference. At the Frenetic Children's Division, we all worked with boys and girls, and usually adults. Almost all of us played with both sexes too when we weren't working. The lace only indicated our preference, or the gender we felt we could be romantic with. It was the opposite of the duvet colors. Light pink lace meant the person preferred boys, light blue meant the person preferred girls, and white meant the person liked having sex with boys and girls. Five of the beds in room 46 had white lace on them. which meant they liked to play with everybody. This was important, as I later learned, because there was a lot of sex going on in these dorm rooms.

All of the beds were made up immaculately, much nicer than I could ever make my own bed. Mum never told me I had to make my own bed, so I'd had very little practice. I wondered if I'd have to learn how to do it so perfectly in order to stay there. I wondered if the rules were strict.

Just beyond the beds, toward the windows, there were two large, round, wooden tables with 8 sturdy, wooden chairs each, the same type as were next to each walk-in closet door. A little farther from the windows and off to the sides were two smaller round tables, each with four padded chairs. The doors to the left and the right of the main doorway led to our two bathrooms. Each had two large baths, two showers, an enormous Jacuzzi, and four toilets in stalls. (Very little was kept private at Frenetic, but toilets were.) An odd dispensing machine in each bathroom reminded me these were mixed bathrooms, and that there were likely to be other teenage girls besides Jillian, who was now gone.

"So what do you think?" I asked Annie, a little excited, and still hard, but trying not to influence him. "You can come see me here anytime and even stay overnight in my bed because you have a contract as an actor, but I'll also have a big room in the accessory tower, and I can have another bedroom or playroom or studio or whatever I want there. It's really big, and they'll do it up however I like. We can be alone there if we want."

"You look so happy!" said Annie with a smile. He put his arms around my neck, and we kissed. "You can live wherever you want, you sweet boy! You know that, and you know that I will visit you lots, no matter where it is, as long as you are happy there. You must visit me too though. We have a lovely house, and I think you will like my parents."

I hugged him tightly and happily, oblivious to the fact that he had just invited me to meet his parents. I wanted him to like my new home, and it meant a lot to me that he was happy with me living there.

"Can I live here then?" I asked the man who was showing us the room.

"Why, I don't see why not," he said. "We have had no requests as yet for the three vacancies in this room."

"Three vacancies?" I asked.

"Indeed Sir. Ms. Jillian and the brothers Harlow will not be returning in the fall as planned. I believe you know that Ms. Jillian will be moving to an apartment. The Harlows only yesterday accepted an offer in America, and they will be moving there this summer, which makes the two beds on the end also available. You may of course choose which bed you…"

"I want the one by Yvgenia!" I interrupted.

"Yes Sir, it shall be yours, but your agent must also give his written consent." Randy nodded and smiled at me. "I will work out the details with Mr. Christianson. Welcome to the Children's Dormitory, Mr. Hawk!" he said, shaking my hand. Annie kissed me slowly and very sweetly. My boner wasn't going away anytime soon.

***

"How could a boy who's lived through so much pain be so happy?"

I got to know my friends better when I asked them how they had answered the psychologist's question about why they wanted to do child porn. They told me their answers, and a lot more. They told me about their lives before porn. Sebastian's story was so sad that I don't think I could ever smile again if it happened to me. How could he be such a happy person now? He has a miraculous ass, sure, but he has a lot of other miracles about him.

Chapter 43
Origins

"That was easy," I said to Randy as we walked back to the studio.

"We like to keep things easy for you kids," he said. "You need to focus on learning, not just how to be great at porn, but also your studies when summer holidays are over. There is a lot of paperwork involved with this dorm room that you won't see, but for now just enjoy your new home, and let me earn my commission by taking care of the rest, ok Hawk?"

"Ok!" I said with a smile.

It had been a long day, and my feelings had gone up and down and all over the place. I'd met loads of new people, and had sex with several of them. I even deep throated the actor with the biggest cock at Frenetic! (I didn't count Baron Gargantua because he worked for another studio. He only came to Frenetic from time to time to do scenes for special reasons.) Then I'd shouted at Randy, and it was about something stupid. Maybe in time I would learn not to make all these stupid mistakes.

Everything had changed again that day. I was very, very wealthy now (or so I believed – I had no idea how much more was to come in the days and years ahead), and I was also a resident of room 46 in the children's dorm, along with Yvgenia and Adrian. Wouldn't he be surprised! I had learned that if I was really nice and clean on the inside, ATM blowjobs were nothing to worry about, and the fruity lube tasted good. I learned how badly rich people wanted to be around me, and that they would pay thousands of pounds just to be near me and have a kiss or a casual touch on my skin.

I also learned how severe an offense it was for an adult, even a very powerful adult like Mr. Buford, to touch me without my permission. I didn't understand why, but I learned that's the way it was. Adults had to treat us kids with extraordinary respect. Nobody had ever shown me respect like that before.

I learned that fisting a woman's pussy was a bit nasty, but there were some funny parts about pushing my whole arm up her ass. I learned my body was quite healthy, but the pediatric psychologist wanted to keep an eye on me to make sure I was coping well. That should be easy for her now that I was moving into the children's dorm, room 46.

I learned also that my body was unusual because my ass and throat seemed to stretch a lot more than usual. And I made a new friend, a sweet girl named Yvgenia, who seemed to need a new friend. She might have needed a good hard shag as well.

***

Randy, Annie, and I went back to the studio dining area for root beers and coffee for Randy, and we met Boris and Sebastian sitting at a table kissing and holding each other. Sebastian was on Boris' lap. We joined them, and Randy said, "I hope we're not intruding?"

"No, not inter-trude," said Sebastian. "Tell for Boris how love him for longest years, and very nice for cum for love for people there, not for only camera for person at home watch. Love person at home always, but love all here for table very much. Is very special love." He looked each of us in the eye. It almost looked like he wanted to cry.

We all raced to be the first to say, "I love you too, Sebastian!" A few arms that were near him reached around his shoulders, and he did start to cry.

"Such friends have Sebastian, such love," he sobbed. "Is so I must cry for say this love to you."

I remembered the look on his face while he was cumming, how sincere he looked, and how different it was from when he was performing. He was just lying there experiencing it, feeling the moment with people he loved, people who wanted him to show himself instead of putting on a show for the camera. He knew he could relax and feel the joy. He was free to let his face do whatever it wanted to do, and he knew we loved him. It was his way of saying "I know you love me, and I will give the most sensitive part of myself to you."

He was a very sweet boy, and completely honest about everything, especially about love. The only time he pretended to feel something was when he was acting, which is what actors do. Even then we all act with sincerity, because we all love everyone we work with, and we all love the viewers at home.

It's different though when you love someone you imagine to be watching you instead of the people who are actually with you and touching you. Sebastian was happy nearly all the time, and that was not an act. He truly was that happy, and he truly loved everybody, even his alcoholic father. It was good for me to be around him. He was crying happy tears, and it felt good to see someone else doing it this time. It felt good to see my new friend so full of happiness and love.

Randy left the four of us because he had to see Markus in his office about some business things, and he also had to set things up so I could move into my dormitory. Then he was going to visit the clinic to learn what he could about IAH. He said he would meet us after tea.

We sat on opposite sides of the table, paired off and cuddling, Sebastian still on Boris' lap, and Annie with me. I gently pulled Annie onto my lap too. He was so soft, and he weighed about as much as a feather. Well, maybe a big feather, but it felt good. The flesh on his ass and thighs melted into mine, and they became as one. I was bigger than Annie, but not by much. I was also several months younger. Why would an older boy like him want to be with a younger boy like me? I couldn't think like that; I would get scared again.

I told them all about my appointment with Linda, the pediatric psychologist. I didn't want to tell them about loving Annie so much it hurt, or why I was so easily scared of losing everything – of losing Annie. So I asked them how they answered her question about why they wanted to make child porn.

Boris answered first. "When small boy in Nizhny, not have always money. Even times happening when not have home. Mother go away for man not Boris' daddy, live for Bulgaria now. Boris' daddy work much, away much, not pay always for apartment. Is no have money. One time apartment close. You know? Not go in apartment for key. Paper for door say go away, need money for live here. Boris and Daddy sleep for park outside.

"When seven, Daddy meet man. He pay Daddy for take Boris picture, no clothes. Take many picture. Later pay Daddy much money for fuck Boris. Then later pay much, much money for fuck Boris for movie.

"Was little boy, very small boy. Hurting much! Oh hurting in ass much! Then when hurt, still do again for next day, for all day, for many men one day, then next. Boris and Daddy have again flat for live, so no complain. Daddy get better job, and Boris no more work for bad man. You no believe, but miss sometime. When ass not hurt, want fuck again. Not for bottom so much. Like fuck for people if people nice. Like for give them nice too.

"Daddy find other man, make one scene for only week, have six day no scene until seven day, then scene. No much work, but pay more than bad man, and much fun. Make fun for other when buy movie too. Still must for bottom. Little is always for bottom. Trevor Boy know that. Boris not like that, but is ok, much fun for other things, and ass not hurt now. Man always easy for Boris' ass, take time, feel much good, much good. Then Boris have ten year, Daddy learn more money for other country. Move for Magyar…"

Sebastian glanced at him and said, "No Magyar. Is Hungaria for English."

Boris gave an embarrassed giggle and received a loving kiss from Sebastian before continuing. "Mean for Hungaria. Make many child porn with man, with boy, first time with girl, and first time with woman." He smiled at Sebastian. "Meet Sebastian for make Hungaria film." They kissed again. "Go also Czechia, also Romania. Then Boris have eleven, cock grow much big, then Boris top for child porn! Top for boy, top for girl if no boy for scene. Even fuck first woman for pussy. Is ok. Woman not hurt. Close eye, pretend is boy, is ok. She like. Money get better, but Boris love work, love people, much love Sebastian! Smile always, much love, give love when make love, is good! Doctor Linda like answer. Talk for much love make child porn, much love. New home in Czechia with Daddy. Go there for September. Try talk Daddy move for UK, maybe move for America."

"Wow," I said. There was so much I hadn't known about Boris. "That sounds awful! Your dad made you do something that hurt so much just for money? He sounds terrible!"

"No!" said Boris, surprisingly harshly. "Not understand. Love Daddy much. Daddy love Boris very much, not want hurt for Boris. Daddy not tell for Boris do these things. Daddy ask Boris for make naked picture only. Man ask Boris for fuck, give for Daddy money. Say yes. Tell Daddy money for much picture. Boris do for need home.

" Boris tell Daddy, 'I do this,' not Daddy tell Boris for must do this. Make movie, Daddy not know, then man surprise for Daddy, money for movie. Boris make scene, make movie, Daddy no happy. Man give money for Daddy, not Boris, but is ok, have new flat, have food, have warm, have school again, is ok. But Daddy happy go away. Say, 'Not need for do film!' Then, say for Daddy, 'You not believe, know you never believe, but fuck for movie comes for be fun! Like for fucking from man, and like for make child porn, for make many happy.' Tell Daddy porn fun for Boris. Later, Daddy say is ok, make for movie of porn, make for his boy Boris happy, but only work for good man, for good studio."

"I'm sorry," I said. "I didn't mean… I thought…" I looked down. I'd made Boris angry by mistake. I felt guilty.

"No, Trevor Boy," he said with his easy smile and those Boris eyes. "English not so good for Boris, I think. Must make you to know Daddy love Boris. Is good man. Is very good man. He not like Boris hurt for money. Not want shouting for Trevor Boy, only for Trevor Boy understand Daddy loves, is good man, is very good man. Is Boris sneaking for make film secret, not Daddy making Boris for make film."

"Oh!" I said with relief. It was certainly true, the Russian boys' English wasn't very good (ok, it was terrible, but we laughed about it a lot in those days), but I'd had no real problem understanding them before. I excused myself and helped Annie back into his chair. Then I stood up, walked over to Boris, and gave him a big, sweet kiss, the kind that only Annie usually got from me.

"Boris know English not so good," he said, "so if not understand, want Trevor Boy ask, is ok? Ask not make feel bad. Make feel good when Trevor Boy ask. Ask mean Trevor Boy listen, mean Trevor Boy want understand for Boris."

"Ask also for Sebastian," said the cute blonde boy on Boris' lap, the one with the new hairstyle that I still wasn't sure I liked, though he did look cuter now than when I'd first seen it. I kissed him too.

"Ok, I will ask," I said, "but promise you won't be embarrassed or upset if I ask?" They both agreed with emphatic smiles. I returned to my chair, kissed Annie, and helped him back onto my lap.

***

"Sebastian go next?" he asked. I nodded. "Is eight year old boy, live for north, in town Dudinka. Is beautiful in Dudinka. Trevor Boy like very much!"

Boris laughed and said, "Trevor Boy no is ice cube! Not like so much, I think."

"Is beautiful," said Sebastian, giving Boris another kiss. "In summer, some time see sun all night, not go down. In winter, some time not so cold. See light boreas. You know boreas light?" he asked.

I shook my head, and Annie said, "Here we call it the northern lights, sometimes the aurora borealis. I've only seen pictures. We can't see them in London. I bet they're pretty!"

"Is very pretty," said Sebastian. "So, why I want for child porn make film? All boy in Dudinka have man, not for him daddy. Is other man. Talk for things with man that not want Daddy knowing. Is safe. Is much wise. Much wise… Is like for uncle, but more close, more love. Call for him lyubit' dyadyu. Mean "love uncle" for English. Is man teach boy thing not teach for school. Is important for learn how live, how honor, how talk for people nice, such things.

"Also, for Dudinka, much time school not open for day, for week, more some time, when big storm of snow for town. Have much for dig snow. On day for not in school, man then teach boy also for school lesson. Man teach boy how he be man for growing up. Man always love very much for this boy, and boy love man. When love, is kiss. In Russia, always kiss all person for lip. Kiss for love, is good, no?

"Man also ask for boy, does boy like girl? Sebastian like boy now. Not always know for like boy or like girl, but man help boy learn, is gay or no? Must know for young. Then not have foolish when older. Is also important for be safe in Russia. Only some few place in Russia is safe for be gay. Most boy like girl, but many boy like also boy. We four boys here like boy. Other boy is nice for stay warm in winter, when not see sun for long time. But if like other boy, man teach how love for other boy, how fuck and other sex with boy. If like girl, man find woman for teach how fuck and sex for girl. Lyubit' dyadyu for Sebastian have name Dmitri. Love Dmitri very much. Much much love for Dmitri. Call for him 'Lyubi' because is for love. Some time cry for miss Lyubi Dmitri."

Sebastian paused for a bit, but he didn't seem to cry. Then he said, smiling, "For most time, Dmitri make Sebastian smile for think on him. Dmitri not want Sebastian feel sad, but say also 'must cry for feel sad. For feel sad, must cry for people for honest with love.' Love for Lyubi! Teach for love all people. Teach love Sebastian, mean for Sebastian love Sebastian, is most important. Do all things for love for Sebastian, because if love Sebastian, must always be true Sebastian. True Sebastian love always all people. True Sebastian always share and be honest, not hide how feel. Always show how feel.

"Dmitri very good friend for Daddy for long time. Why Daddy ask Dmitri be lyubit' dyadyu for Sebastian. Daddy with Dmitri work for same company, load ship for river, then ship go on sea. Dmitri always for Sebastian family home, for meal, for vodka, for game, for teach Sebastian. Dmitri take Sebastian for camping, for rowing boat, for hotel for fucking, for ride on bicycle, for drive long for go no place, talk only, then drive home. But love most Dmitri teach sex. Have big, much big cock, like many Russian man. Teach when seven age old for suck cock, make boy feel good. Dmitri suck Sebastian cock many time, show orgasm. Sebastian try suck Dmitri cock. Not fit for mouth, but practice! Is again and again, no fit. One day, fit! Some of Dmitri cock fit for mouth. He like much! Like much for make Dmitri happy. Then tell me what is cum. Tell me some time is for make baby, but for boy is like food. Feed Sebastian one time. Is ok, but then feed many time, is very good! If love man, then cum taste very good always.

"Then teach when eight for ass sex. Is normal in Dudinka for boy reach eight for learn sex in ass, but only if gay. Have for lube on him finger, put in ass, Sebastian jump for feel much good! He ask if hurt. Not speak well with grunting for finger in ass, but try for telling him no hurt, all feel much, much good. Put other finger in, feel good. Then three, feel very good! He not understand. Say boy should much hurt for two finger. But feel good for three finger, want more. Tell him want more. Tell him want big Dmitri cock for ass. Put lube for cock, then push slowly for ass. Want all! Want hurry, so push back for getting all cock in ass. He surprise, very surprise. Feel much very good! Not think Sebastian ass ready for fuck, but Sebastian ass always ready for fuck. Push back on him, all in ass, then out ass, then in ass, want faster."

Sebastian looked me in the eye and said, "See how Trevor Boy ass like Sebastian ass? Stretch for very big cock, feel good?"

"Yeah," I said. "That's how it feels for me too! I didn't know it was supposed to hurt except for when I'm not stretched open first."

Sebastian continued, "Dmitri scare for hurt Sebastian. Dmitri love, not want for hurt. Next night, Dmitri come for home and talk for Daddy. Bring Daddy in bedroom and show fuck in Sebastian ass. Daddy not believe him eye! Say need for picture or video, find work, make rich for small boy and small ass fuck by huge cock.

"Daddy take picture, take also video, for Dmitri fuck for ass. Send out for find work for child porn. But terrible, terrible thing happen." He paused. He began to breathe heavily, then he turned his head into Boris' chest and cried. It wasn't just soft, happy tears either. It was deeply sad tears, the kind of tears that you just can't talk through.

When he'd gathered himself, he said, "Sorry for… No. Not sorry for cry! Lyubi not happy if say that. Cry for people with love always important if sad. Feel sad now." He inhaled, closed his eyes, and said calmly, "Police man find body for Lyubi Dmitri, freeze outside. Say Dmitri heart no work, so fall down for die. Then cold make freeze after die."

There was a cold, dead silence to match the story. Nobody wanted to say anything until we knew how Sebastian felt. "Much cry," he sobbed, "many time much cry. Sad for lose my Lyubi. Mamochka also cry. Daddy cry only for when bury, then not say word for two day. All much love for Dmitri."

Annie took a napkin from the table and wiped his eyes. It was so sad to see such a sweet boy as Sebastian in so much grief.

"Sorry," I said, "But who is Mamochka? Boris used that word a few days ago. I want to understand, and you said to ask."

"Not be sorry, Trevor Boy," Sebastian said. "Mamochka is Mama, is Mum, mother. Is nice word for Mum, only you mum, no other person mum. Is Mum, and only when much, much love for Mum. Maybe mum for Trevor Boy not Mamochka? Is good for you ask." Boris nodded in agreement.

"Then Daddy have much problem, very bad problem. No want work for load ship on river," he continued. "He no can work for miss friend Dmitri. Begin drink much vodka. Drink two bottle for day, some day three. Always work together for Daddy and Dimitri many year. Family sad for much time, but Daddy not well. Not like for feel sad. Daddy drink so feel angry, not feel sad. Hit Mamochka many time. Scream for her, say 'you no good for wife! Not make for good home!' Is lies, only for hurt Mamochka. Daddy do many things terrible. Tell some for Trevor Boy last night at Gold Boy, drinking Root Beer.

"Daddy remember what Sebastian do for Dmitri with ass, want sell for men, buy vodka. First say man fuck boy if give for him one bottle vodka. These men not good, not give love, not want love, not like bath. Smell very bad. Daddy make Sebastian wear short pant, no shirt when cold outside, sell for sex for man. Soon want two southand ruble and two bottle vodka for fuck him boy. Need money for bribe police man. Buy pink girl panty for Sebastian, make wear outside only girl panty and nice shoes for wear in school. Not let wear sock even. Buy also pink ribbon, put in Sebastian hair, looking like girl.

"Friend for school see Sebastian only wear girl panty outside with pretty pink ribbon for hair. Some laugh, most try give blanket or help Sebastian, but Daddy chase away, hit some, beat small child, friend for Sebastian, now scared for Daddy. When friend try for help, also Daddy hit Sebastian many time, then drink more. Only go inside when storm for wind and for snow. Was very, very bad time for Sebastian. Is what alcohol sick do for Daddy. Before alcohol, love very much, and hug and many kisses for Daddy boy Sebastian. When drink, Mamochka and Sebastian only hurt, he punch, he kick, he scream, he sell boy for street, try sell Mamochka, man not want, know for she hurt him. Mamochka much strong!

"But have something for mail one day. Is check for hundred southand ruble. Is from Budapest. Want for me try make child porn movie. Money for Mamochka go, Sebastian go, also give place for stay for week. We go for there, Mamochka and Sebastian. Sneak so Daddy not know. Never see Daddy again. Friend say think Daddy die also." He paused and sobbed a bit before continuing. How could a boy who's lived through so much pain be so happy?

"Make scene in morning for big studio in Budapest. All person for studio speak Russian for Sebastian and Mamochka. Make feel good." I thought about how good everyone was making me feel at Frenetic. People in the larger child porn studios really do treat kids well, and they want us to be comfortable and happy in our work.

"Also man in scene with big cock like dear Dmitri," he continued. "They no believe Sebastian like such big cock for ass, but feel very good. Man also slow, so make go in fast. Much surprise, this man. Think of Dmitri when fuck. Love Dmitri, and make smile! Man make feel good, and Dmitri want Sebastian do for feel good, not be sad for lose Dmitri. He say love Sebastian first. Love Sebastian mean be happy for remember Dmitri.

"Director ask for Sebastian do other scene. Also ask Mamochka if ok for do other scene, say give two hundred southand ruble for Mamochka. She no care for money. she care for Sebastian want do more. Say for Mamochka, 'Please Mamochka, like do more film here! Is love, is fun! Like very much!' Mamochka take check, and Sebastian do other scene." He looked up and kissed Boris. "Other scene have Boris! First meet Boris in scene. Such beautiful boy he! And big cock. No man cock. Very big boy cock. Boris fuck so much good in ass. Not need big man cock for feel wonderful. Boris, he know. He make feel very good. He know use cock. Use cock for love, I think. When become man, Boris cock big like Baron Gargantua!" We all had a giggle, and I for one wondered if it was true.

"No want like Baron Gargantua!" said Boris with a smile. "Never he can get for good blowjob. Want like Randy Man. Then always can work with nice boy, or sexy ladyboy. Maybe like King Khan be nice, but no so big like Gargantua!" We all laughed, wondering if he was telling the truth. Then Sebastian continued his story.

"Director want Sebastian make many movie for him. Give more money for Mamochka. Never go again for Dudinka. After work short time, have already learn answer for Doctor Linda. Is love. Is love for Sebastian, do thing he love, give love for many other. Also make for money. Studio pay Sebastian money for make film, but also pay money for Mamochka, same for Frenetic. Most day Mamochka at studio with Sebastian. So, all love, money good, much time for be with Mamochka. Doctor Linda like answer."

Boris kissed Sebastian on the cheek and calmly stroked his hair. "Need tell other part next, I think," he said softly, a great deal of love in his voice. Sebastian looked him in the eye, and this time I know I saw fear, then a quick nod. Sebastian was about to do something brave, I thought, and I could tell how much he trusted Boris when he agreed so quickly.

"Is no answer for Trevor Boy question," Sebastian began, "but is maybe important for know Sebastian." He took a deep breath. He wouldn't hold back tears, I knew that, but it's hard to get through a story when you're crying hard. I think he just wanted to be able talk.

"Work for Budapest big studio three month. One day, is quick, is simple, is like all world end for Sebastian. Mamochka buy ice cream for Sebastian. Sit for table in outside for eat. Mamochka go for buy coffee, then join at table." He began to shake, and Boris held him close and rocked him, stroking his hair and gently caressing his belly.

"Cross for her street, and…" he began to sob, but he was determined to finish. "Cross for her street, and fast c-car r-r-run Mamochka down, all g-gone for d… for dead, in front for Sebastian eye." He cried into Boris' chest. A thoughtful waiter, seeing what was happening, brought a fresh, soft, hand towel, discreetly handed it to Boris, and left without saying a word.

I felt deeply wounded that my sweet friend had suffered so much hurt and loss. First Dmitri, then his dad, and then his mum! Again I wondered – how could he be such a happy boy?

"Is for love I show for you my cry," he sobbed. "Dmitri say always, always show for people who love how feel. Is for trust them. Need trust for love. Is how boy can be happy again if not pretend when feel for cry. Dmitri very good man, very wise man."

I had never, ever heard anyone talk like that about crying. I'd heard people laugh at me when I cried. I'd heard Mum and others tell me to stop crying, or that things didn't really hurt that bad. They might have said I wanted attention. They gave so many reasons for a boy not to cry, but here was a boy who was taught by a man that one of the sincerest ways to show someone love was to cry in front of them if you felt like crying, and to show them your feelings.

Suddenly I had the answer to my question from two days ago, at my signing party at Cockerel Manor! I didn't know why the crowd applauded when I began to cry during my short speech, and I told them I didn't understand, but this must be the answer. When you cry in front of somebody, that means you trust them, and you allow them to show that they love you. And if you trust someone, that means you love them, at least a little bit, because you have to love someone before you can trust them.

Sebastian wiped his eyes and continued. "Boris good friend for Sebastian, and Boris family also love much for Sebastian. Take to home for theirs, give room, give food, not want money, though Sebastian very rich. Not make new money, not allow for studio when parent die, but still have much money for bank. Stay for Budapest, make legal. Not adopt for parent, but make gourd… godrian…"

"Guardian?" sniffed Annie.

"Guardian," agreed Sebastian. "Boris daddy make guardian for Sebastian. Now, where Boris go, Sebastian go also. Live for Czechia now with Boris family, also some time for London live with Randy Man."

Living with both parents, parents who actually loved him, and having a special man like Dmitri, a sort of second dad, and then losing them all, one from a heart attack, one as a violent alcoholic, and one being smashed by a car in front of his eyes, must have been more pain than any kid could bear. But Sebastian was not just any kid. He was courageous and unafraid of being who he was.

***

"Sebastian," said Annie, "I have heard you talk about losing Dmitri and your parents before, and it hurts to hear the pain you went through, but I feel so much love from you every time I hear you talk about it." He got up off of my lap and kissed Sebastian, saying "I love you Sebastian, so much!"

"Love much for Anniechka also!" he said as Annie returned to my lap.

These stories had been tragedy, and then triumph. I thought my home life was terrible, but at least I had a home, and I'd never seen anyone get killed in front of me. Mom was bad, but she never beat me or made me stand outside in the cold wearing only girls' knickers so she could sell me for sex to get money to buy her gin. That was like some of my fantasies, but when it really happened to my friend, it wasn't much of a fantasy anymore. It was horrific.

As I thought about these things, and Annie wiped his nose on the napkin, I realized that I had not cried at all. Why not? I loved these boys, and it hurt to hear their stories, but it was more like someone had pushed a knife in my chest. It wasn't sit-and-cry sad. It was more like I-can't-breathe-help-me-this-hurts pain. I wasn't sad as much as I was cut open with my entrails thrown to the dogs. Well, maybe not that strong, but it was more hurt and shock than sad. I think.

"I guess it's my turn," said Annie. "There's really not much to tell. I'm from a nice neighborhood in London, my parents have always had money, and I've never even lost a grandparent. I guess not all of us in child porn have had tragedy in our lives, and porn hasn't always been some kind of a salvation. It feels a bit embarrassing to tell my boring story after these two, but I want you to know where I came from." He kissed me, and his eyes lingered in mine for a while, accenting his soft smile. Boris cleared his throat and giggled, and Annie continued.

"Mum discovered me in the garden wanking one day. That's really all. Two minutes' embarrassment was my tragedy. I was eight, and she thought maybe an eight year-old boy who is already wanking might fancy making sex movies. She knew I liked to be pretty, and I had been wearing girls' things at home for as long as I could remember, so she thought that might make me well suited for a variety of porn genres. She asked if I was gay, and I told her I didn't really know, so she thought making child porn might help me find out." He kissed me when he said this. "I think I have that answer now at least.

"Mum wanted me involved in social activities and sports over the summer. I hate sports, so she thought this might be a suitable alternative. Daddy is away a lot for his work, so really it was Mum pushing me to try this. Since what I really wanted was to learn whether I was gay, and whether child porn was something I would like, it took some time before I could get a contract. They want actors who know already that they want to make child porn. So I worked without a contract as a fluff boy over the summer holidays last year. It was brilliant! I discovered the lovely people here, and their thoughts about love and sharing what we have, and I discovered how much I actually liked sex. Wanking was fun and all, and I'd thought sex would be lovely someday, but when I walked onto the set on my first day as a fluff boy, I had no doubts.

"I was scared though. Walking down the corridor naked for the first time, with people looking at me, and thinking that it was no big deal to them, that took a while to get used to, but when I stepped through the door to stage 5 and saw so many naked people in the fluff area having a brilliant orgy, just for the fun of it, I don't mind saying I got a stiffy that didn't go away until lunchtime that day!

Then there was the sight of all the equipment, the lights, cameras, the boom microphones, all pointed at another group of naked kids having sex. It reminded me of a firing squad, only it was with cannons and big artillery, but instead of firing things that hurt, they were firing orgasms! I know it's silly, but that's the first thing I thought of that day.

Then there were the fully dressed technical crew, the people scrutinizing it all on video screens as it happened, the designers, craft services, and even the nurse, all were like a live audience who weren't just watching. They were concentrating on every aspect of the kids having sex! This was definitely for me. My body became like a gift for everyone who liked what they saw. Who wouldn't absolutely love that?" He wiggled his ass on my rock-hard cock and kissed me with a cute giggle. The way he described it was amazing! It was everything I'd felt on my first day too, but I didn't really know it until he said so just then. Even though I'd had more sex that afternoon than anyone ever, his story made me horny again!

"Of course Mum is delighted, and Daddy is proud of me too," he continued. "Daddy says when I'm an adult, I might have more money than he does. I don't care about money really. Daddy won't visit the studio. He says it makes him uncomfortable, and I guess some people are like that. He loves me though, and he's very proud of my success. However, you all know Mum is brilliant! I'm glad she pushed me to try something new.

"So my answer to Linda's question was really about the attitude around here toward love and making people happy, feeling like I am giving a gift of my body for people to share if they wish, my love for sex, and the chance to try new things to learn about my own sexuality and even my gender. And I told you before, it's far better than rugby or dressage, though I wouldn't half fancy being in the middle of a scrum one day!

"Those were the sorts of answers I gave Linda. Really, she seemed pleased. Of course, I didn't see her until after two months of fluff work helped me decide that I wanted to make child pornography and why. Most of the kids at my school who know about my work here think it's brilliant, but the headmaster has asked me not to discuss it during school. Mum calls him an 'old coprolite.' That means a piece of fossilized dinosaur poo, because he's so old-fashioned and unchanging."

I kissed Annie, and loved him more than ever. It wasn't anything he said, really. It was just knowing more about him. I loved him, but I knew so little about him, and maybe that scared me a little bit too.

All in all, their answers to Linda's question didn't seem very different from mine, but I sure learned a lot about my dearest new friends. Some of Sebastian's story was so sad, I couldn't bear to think about it, but then he had to live with it every day. How could he be so happy all the time? How? I wondered if he could teach me.

***

The world I had come from was full of lies. My new world had no limits. Was that a good thing for a boy my age? I had learned that everything about sex was foul, disgusting, and wrong. Now it seemed that there was nothing about sex that was foul, disgusting, or wrong. Everything was ok! Trish and Lena should have been an important lesson. What I learned was that putting my fist inside a woman's pussy felt nasty. What I should have learned was that sometimes limits were a good thing. I had never set limits of my own, and I was not in a mood to accept anyone else's. I was living very close to disaster in so many ways. I was worried about losing my new life for all the wrong reasons. Was there anything I wouldn't try?

Chapter 44
Shlomo

At tea, Boris and Sebastian decided to jump into the boy pile while Annie and I settled into a comfortable cushion in the circle in the middle of the room. I loved it more and more when he sat on my lap. It was easier for me to feel every part of his chinchilla-soft skin, and it was easier to kiss him. I wasn't a strong boy, but he never felt very heavy. He had a super-soft ass. My stupid brother Ian had a bony butt. If he sat on my lap, it hurt! Ian was only a little bigger than I was too.

I saw two more familiar faces in the circle, but Annie didn't know either of them. One of them was Yvgenia, and she was delighted that I was going to move in with her in room 46. "And this is my friend Shlomo," she said, introducing the very small, cute, and very familiar boy she was sitting with. "He lives in room 46 as well, so we're all roommates."

I had met Shlomo that morning. He'd introduced himself to me with his working name, Shlong O. He let me see and touch his oversized and circumcised cock up close, the first one I'd ever seen on a real boy, and not just in a picture. I already knew he would be my roommate in room 46 because I'd seen his painting above his bed. It turned out he was only eight years old. His cock was much bigger than mine, and everyone said mine was long for a boy of eight, nearly nine. His cock was about as thick as Boris' and longer than Randy's.

"My new bed is going to be right between theirs," I said to Annie. "I already know everyone on one side of the room, and no one on the other side."

"It's ok," said Shlomo. "we'll introduce you. They're all super nice. There are two more boys, one girl, and one teenage ladyboy who is fifteen. So that's…" He counted on his fingers. "That's five boys and three girls."

"Are you sure about that, Shlomo?" asked a boy as he lept into the circle. "What do you really know about our new roommate Trevor here?"

"Adrian!" I said as he kissed me, and then Annie.

"Have you seen the kind of knickers the boy wears?" Adrian asked as he kissed Shlomo and Yvgenia.

"Yes I have," said Shlomo, looking proud of himself, "and I think they are very pretty!"

"What a sweet boy!" said Annie.

"Thanks, Shlomo! I really like the ones I was wearing this morning, and they are the prettiest thing I have ever owned."

"I hope you'll own something prettier soon," said Shlomo, in a soft voice, blushing.

"Thanks," I said, not sure whether he was talking about clothes.

"You'll find very few butch boys in the dorms," said Adrian, "so for a butch boy who likes sissy boys, that's where all the fun is at!"

"But what if I like to be butch but sometimes I like to be sissy?" I asked.

"Sounds like you'll have a lot of fun with yourself too then!" he said with a wink.

"Shlomo's not a sissy boy, are you?" Yvgenia asked, putting her hand on his knee.

"For a boy like Trevor?" he asked. "I might be." He blushed, then gave me a cute grin, followed by an even cuter kiss. When he sat back down, Yvgenia slapped his leg for his cheek, then kissed him.

"He is so cute!" Annie whispered in my ear.

I smiled and nodded, whispering back, "And I get to sleep next to him every night!" I licked Annie's ear. "If you like, I'll rent him to you on Mondays and Thursdays."

***

"Trevor Hawk!" shouted Shlomo when Esmeralda held up my super-sexy purple silk bikini knickers with gold and black paisley. I had to lean down to kiss his sweet little mouth for the second time. When I kissed him, I noticed two things. He'd been standing on his toes, and he'd gotten a boner while kissing me. A very big boner. That boy's cock was huge! I gave it a few quick tugs, which made him gasp and squeak like the brakes on a rusty old steam locomotive. His eyes had opened wide, and so had Esmeralda's

"Thank you Auntie," I said with a kiss as Esmeralda handed me my clothes. Shlomo had dived for cover under Yvgenia's arm and curled up in a ball. I didn't mean to embarrass him.

"Sometimes he's bold," said Yvgenia, "and then he can be really bashful."

"Sorry Shlomo," I said. "You were just being so sweet and so cute. I didn't mean to embarrass you."

He peaked up from under Yvgenia's arm and giggled at me, then hid again.

"Need put collar for that boy," said Boris, who had joined us, along with Sebastian, for the undies game.

"Collar?" I asked.

"For be slave," he said. "Want be slave for you. Must put collar for him, then own for slave."

"You having me on?" I asked Boris.

"I think he's right, Trevor," said Annie. "You should find out if that's what he wants. If you think you'd like that kind of thing, it's a big step."

I had seen BDSM activity on the lot already. Lena and Trish were both wearing collars when we filmed my promo video. I thought it was funny, but Shlomo was too sweet and little to be like that.

"Come on, Shlomo," said Yvgenia. "Sit on your own. Sit properly, there's a good boy."

The small boy with the huge cock, which was still hard, hopped out from under Yvgenia and sat between her and me. He looked at me with a shy grin.

"You would be a sissy boy for me?" I asked him.

He didn't say anything, but he blushed and lowered his head with a cute, irresistible smile, holding his eyes on me. He was an unbelievable flirt! "Wait for me in your dressing room after tea," I said to him. "Don't leave your dressing room until you've seen me. I'll have something for you." His boner bounced as he nodded.

"Oh do be careful," whispered Annie. "Keep it fun. These things can go wrong and people can feel hurt when they do."

"Only for fun," I agreed. "I want to try everything!" It seemed absolutely crazy, but he was so cute, and I thought I could learn more about BDSM with him. Most of all, he was a boy, a very cute boy! No more Trish and Lena.

***

"Yes, a black leather slave collar for a little," I said to the voice on the phone. "Eight years old, yes, but very small for his age. Yes, that's him, Shlong O. And the cuffs, yes, wrists and ankles. Oh, and I need a leash too. What size do they come in? Ok, er, I'd like the two meter leash. Sure, you can bring it to my dressing room. Yes, thank you." I had made the phone call to 222 from the tea room after the undies game. I had all that gear already. Diane had given it to me as my welcome gift, but it was all at Randy's house.

Annie giggled, "You're going through with this then?"

"Of course!" I said. "For fun. He's super cute, and it's his idea. It's just for fun. We'll be fine."

Annie introduced me to a ten year-old girl after the undies game. She wore black lipstick and a black leather collar. She did kids BDSM films, and she was a slave to a teenage boy who shared a two-bed dorm room with her on our floor. She told me about being a good master and knowing what slaves want, how to be responsible, that sort of thing. Shlomo and I could work things out, I thought. I understood the worst kinds of risks, and I decided that an informal, playful thing would be best. Maybe I'd call him my pet boy instead of my slave.

***

Annie had to leave early because he and his parents were having dinner with friends in Oxford, and it was a long drive. I hated saying goodbye to him every day! I wished he could stay with me in room 46, but he had a family and a nice home, and I had nowhere decent to stay outside the studio complex.

I felt sad as we snogged in the front lobby while wait ing for his mum. He'd put on his soft cotton pink shorts, ruffled ankle socks, pink shoes, and white tank top with the daisy on the front. I had dressed again in my sexy purple silk kit with gold and black paisley and my black fishnets. I'd also put my makeup on. Somehow I liked rubbing Annie's leg more when he was wearing those soft shorts. That was good, because I needed cheering up.

I knew part of that sadness was that nagging feeling that it still wasn't real, and that he would go home and not come back. I decided this was a good time to ask him the question that Linda said I had to ask him. I didn't like hurting when I thought of him, and I wanted to know the answer myself.

"Annie," I began, "you know I said it hurts sometimes because you're so pretty and I love you so much?"

"Oh yes, Trevor sweetie," he said, kissing me. "But you know I love you too, right?"

"Uh huh," I said, and I really did know it. "But… but I have this thing I'm supposed to ask you. Linda wants me to ask you this thing." I was getting scared. Why had I brought it up? "Well, she wants me to ask, but I want to know the answer too."

"Of course sweetie," he said. "Ask anything. When people love each other, they can ask anything, and it's ok. And it's also ok not to answer."

"Ok," I said, taking a deep breath. "I love you and being around you and looking at how pretty you are and hearing your pretty voice," I said all at once, "and I love touching your body all over and having sex too. It's special to me when we do that." He looked at me with curiosity.

"But you mean so much to me that I'm always afraid of doing something stupid and you won't like me anymore. I can't feel good about loving you without also being frightened that you might go away. I've never felt this way about anyone. My whole life is like that now. It's full of precious things that I might lose!"

He hugged me and said, "Oh no, Trevor, I won't go away! I love you, and if people love each other they can sort out their differences."

I kissed him, and then continued, "If you won't ever leave me, but I worry anyway, maybe that's stupid. But what Linda wants me to ask you is if you worry too. Do you worry you might do something stupid, and it might make me go away? I mean, I can't imagine someone like you worrying about such a stupid thing, And I would never go away," a thought that seemed worse than death to me at the time, "but I'm supposed to ask if you worry about losing me too."

He looked into my eyes with an expression that was difficult to read. Then he looked down and hugged me around my chest, saying "All the time." He sniffled, and I could feel warm drips running down my belly.

"I don't know much about your life before three days ago, and I don't know what happens when you become angry with someone or disappointed. Would you go away then? I must be myself though, and I must trust that you love me, the person that I am, and that person can be stupid sometimes. What if I do something stupid?"

"I wouldn't go away if you did something stupid," I said. "Besides, you don't do stupid things. You're like an angel. That's why I get frightened sometimes. Why would an angel want to be with an ordinary boy like me?"

He chuckled softly and said, "You'll know soon enough. I'm no angel, and you're no ordinary boy."

***

We mostly hugged, both of us sobbing a bit, until his mum came into the lobby. "Oh Trevor luv!" his mum said. "Annie told me how pretty you were today over the phone. He was certainly right! And such sexy clothes! Did you two love birds have a scene today?"

I said no and Annie said yes. To answer his mum's perplexed look, he said, "We did a short scene for Trevor's new promo video, not for a full film."

That was not what I was thinking at the time. What we'd done on the chaise lounge felt private. It was only Annie and me. It wasn't like a scene, but really it was a scene. It was different with Annie. My feelings were all about him, not fucking and cumming. It was just us together, and nothing else mattered. There were no cameras, and nobody else existed.

I smiled at him and kissed him. He rubbed the growing bulge in my super-sexy knickers and said to his mum, "Trevor has become a very, very special boy to me, Mum."

"Oh, I see!" said his mum.

"You see," I said to Annie as much as to his mum, "it didn't feel like we were doing a scene. It felt like we weren't here on the lot at all. We were on a beach somewhere with nobody else around, and I was with this real live angel. I mean, I know there were cameras all around, but none of that mattered."

"Oh Trevor!" Annie fell into my arms and hugged me tight, beginning to sob again. Then he kissed me passionately.

When he'd had enough kissing, he said, "You see Mum? It's like that for me as well. I love him, and it's not like how I love the other boys. It's different, and it's very special."

"It sounds as if you two really are love birds," said his mum. "Trevor luv, I'd like to make a suggestion. Since you're new to child porn, strong feelings can become stirred up, and it's easy to get them confused. You two love each other in a very special way, but I hope you will keep talking to Linda about your special relationship with Annie, and Annie sweetheart, I am going to schedule a special appointment for you with Linda as well. What you two boys have is lovely, and I want it to grow as long as you make each other happy, but since you're so young and Trevor's so new, it's very, very important to be careful."

I nodded to her in agreement, but I thought Annie would protest at having to see Linda an extra time. Instead, he smiled and kissed his mum. "That sounds lovely," he said. "I can't think of anything I'd rather talk about than my sweet, pretty boy Trevor!"

"Oh how sweet, luv! But time does make fools of us all," she said. "Come along Annie. It's time we were leaving." I kissed him, feeling much less anxious. As I saw his soft, bare, elegant legs walking away, I wondered whether I should have grabbed one more feel, just to be sure they were real too.

***

I walked to my dressing room to wait for the delivery of Shlomo's collar and things. It was expected to take less than fifteen minutes because they were coming from the gift shop attached to the lobby in the same building. The package was already waiting on my makeup table when I arrived. I took the leather collar, cuffs, and leash out of the packaging. The collar was soft yet strong. The leash was a bit stiff, but Shlomo would get used to it. The cuffs were padded on the inside for extended wear. I walked down the children's dressing room corridor until I found his room. I knocked, and the door opened.

"Come in," said a soft voice.

"Are you alone?" I asked.

"Yes, Sir," the voice said. That was it. He had called me Sir. That meant he wanted this.

As I entered his dressing room, I saw he was naked, stepping backwards to the middle of the floor with his hands behind his back. "Kneel," I said.

He knelt down and bowed his head, keeping his hands behind his back. My cock bounced back up when I saw this. I liked being in charge! I stepped behind him and wrapped the collar around his neck. At that moment, his oversized cock snapped into a boner as well. I fastened the collar and attached the leash before stepping around in front of him.

Then I read from a card, "Shlomo, you are my pet boy, my slave, my property. I own you, your name, and everything about you. You will serve anybody I tell you to serve. You will at all times, even while on the set, represent your master with pride and excellent behavior. During all hours when you are not working, you are mine unconditionally, and you will serve me and only me unless I dismiss you. Do you understand?" Annie's friend had said it was a good idea to say something like this right away to make sure we both wanted the same thing before we were committed. She helped me write it down on the card I was reading from.

"Yes Master," he said in a soft voice.

"When you address your master," I said, "you will speak in a clear and confident voice. If others are around, you will show with your clear voice that you are proud to be my slave. Do you understand, Boy?

"Yes Master," he said clearly, with what looked like a sincerely proud smile.

"Stand," I said. "Turn around." I could tell he was going to be an obedient slave. I put the leather cuffs on his wrists and ankles. Then I connected the wrist cuffs behind his back. "You will wear these items at all times unless a director requires their removal, your collar and these four cuffs. Do you understand?"

"Yes Master."

"You have a nice boner right now," I said. "We are going for a walk. You will keep your cock hard until I give you permission to let it go soft." I paused. Then I turned on him and said, "Your master has given you a command. I expect all commands to be answered with 'Yes Master,' is that clear?"

"Yes Master. Sorry Master."

"Every time you speak to me, you will address me as 'Master' at least once."

"Yes Master," he said.

I paraded Shlomo around the bath hall, then down the corridor to the gift shop, where I also bought him a butt plug and ball gag. I attached the ball gag to his head and mouth, and I had him bend over right there in the store so I could roughly insert the butt plug into him after first having him lick it to make it slippery. He squeaked through the ball gag, and the gathering crowd voiced their approval. I felt an amazing rush from the power, but much more because he was so cute and little, and he was mine. Everyone liked us cute littles, and I had just made the littlest little my property.

"We will step outside now. If anyone wants a service from my new slave boy, follow us and speak with me. He will do as I command," I said to the crowd.

Two men and a boy, who was the son of one of the men, wanted to fuck him, a man and another boy wanted him to suck them, and a woman wanted him to eat her daughter's pussy. The girl was only as big as he was.

I put him on his knees, removed his ball gag, positioned the girl on the grass, her legs spread open in front of him, and I pushed his head into her little pussy. This was not easy for him because he was off-balance, having his hands cuffed behind his back. He had to support part of his weight with his mouth on the girl's pussy, which soon had her screaming with orgasmic ecstasy.

The boy fucked his ass first. I pulled the butt plug out abruptly, which made him gasp. I told the boy he could fuck him dry or lube him with his own spit. He decided to go in as he was. The other boy stepped in front of him and lifted his head by the hair and put Shlomo's face over his cock. The boy held Shlomo's head there as he face-fucked him. The boy in Shlomo's ass came first. He shot a little cum, which made it easier for his dad to shove his cock into Shlomo's tiny ass. He barked and squeaked as the man penetrated him. That made the boy in front cum rather loudly.

After a few minutes of fucking and sucking, the man in back pulled out and shot his load over Shlomo's back and into his hair. The last man jammed into the tiny ass and fucked with ferocity. The man up front pulled his cock head out of Shlomo's mouth and squirted onto Shlomo's face, hair, and glasses, with only a small amount going into the boy's mouth.

"Swallow!" I ordered him, and he did. Randy walked over to us from the Office building. "Do you want a piece of my new boy?" I asked him.

"You took a slave?" Randy asked.

"Yeah," I giggled. "He's so tiny and so cute! I just had to have him!"

The man in back pulled out and said to Randy, "You can have him back here. I'm going to shoot in his face."

"Thank you, that's ok," said Randy. The man face-fucked Shlomo for only a minute before shooting his load all over the boy's face and hair. "He really is a cute little boy. Where'd you find him?"

"He's one of my new roommates," I said. "His bed is next to mine in room 46." I put the ball gag back on him and ordered him to stand. "I don't think he can see well with all that cum on his glasses," I said.

"Why don't you connect him to the hitching post at the front door. He can wait there while we talk business. He will make a cute decoration, all covered in cum. It's his first day, so you should make it something special for him to remember."

Randy showed me some yellow frames, which I'd thought were bicycle racks. "You see these attachment points?" he asked me, indicating a continuous row of steel loops spaced about an inch apart, going all around the rack. "They are positioned so you can hook all four of his cuffs to the frame, in whatever position you want to keep him in."

I connected each cuff to the four corners on the frame. His legs were spread wide, and his arms were spread in a downward direction. The rack came up to his waist, so his arms had to be attached low, though Randy suggested that sometimes it's fun to hook both arms and legs to the top of the rack.

"A little boy like Shlong O. wouldn't reach the ground. He would hang there until you retrieved him." Then Randy whispered something into Shlomo's ear, and the boy nodded, shook his head, then nodded again.

We went inside to my dressing room, leaving my new, sticky, cum-covered boy as a decoration at the front door. I thought about Amber, and how upset I was about seeing her mistreated just two days earlier. Had I really changed that much?

***

When we arrived at my dressing room, I reached for a root beer, and Randy made some coffee in a coffee maker that was above the microwave. "You know," he began, "nearly every top, every slave master on the lot has been trying to collar little Shlomo. How did you get him into a collar?"

"Well," I began, "It wasn't hard, really. He just… you know, he'd shown me his willy this morning, and I remembered him when we were in the tea room. He said that for me he might be a sissy boy if I wanted that. Then he got a huge stiffie when I kissed him after he'd guessed my knickers in the undies game. He had that stiffie through the rest of tea. He played all shy and giggly, and then he wasn't so shy. Boris said I should put a collar on him. So I bought one and I did."

"It sounds as if he chose you," said Randy. "He couldn't have made it more obvious. I need to order something for you."

He picked up the phone on the coffee table and dialed 222. He asked them to send several pamphlets. One was called The First Time Master: A Guide to BDSM Success. He ordered two copies of Abusive Doms and Masters: How to Know if You Are in an Abusive Relationship. Finally, he ordered two copies of Pleasing Master: A Slave's Guide to Worthiness. "Give a copy of Abusive Doms and Masters and Pleasing Master to Shlomo," said Randy. "I want you to read through all three pamphlets. They are not very long, but there is some very important information for you in those pamphlets. I'm sure others have already cautioned you that you must be very careful with a slave. You can hurt him very badly if you are not careful, and he can also hurt you.

"I want you to discuss this with Linda at your next appointment too." I sighed my crabbiest sigh. I was tired of hearing about what I needed to tell Linda!

"Listen to me Hawk," he said. "Linda is not the enemy. Her job is to make sure you stay happy and healthy–that's all. She does not want to take anything from you. She only wants to help you manage what you have. She will not tell you to give up your new slave. She will help you to understand why it's so important to watch yourself, and to watch out for Shlomo. She will help you make it more fun and last longer."

"You whispered in his ear before we came inside," I said.

"Oh yes," said Randy, "I did. I asked if he knew about safe-words and safe gestures, and I asked him to show me the safe gesture for the hitching post."

"Safe gesture?" I asked.

"Yes, that's the very first rule you need to establish as a master," he said. "You need to designate a safe-word, and if you have a gag on him, or if for some other reason he cannot speak or you cannot hear him, you need to have signs and gestures that he can use to tell you he is in trouble and needs to stop whatever is happening.

"That way he can say things like 'ouch,' and he can beg you to stop, which can be part of the fun, but you know it's not serious unless he uses the safe-word. But if he says his safe-word, it's like tapping out of a situation on the set, or like calling 'hold' if something is not right. A safe-word means that you stop whatever you are doing immediately and release him from anything he is attached to. You don't know why he uses his safe word until you stop and he tells you. It can be something very serious, like maybe he can't breathe. Or it might be that he feels uncomfortable with something."

"But isn't a slave supposed to feel uncomfortable?" I asked. "I mean, he's locked to the hitching post rack thing right now. That can't be comfortable."

Randy grinned, but paused before answering. "In BDSM, and slavery is a special part of BDSM, pleasure and pain can become the same thing. Forced discomfort can enhance a slave's pleasure. It's difficult to understand at first, I know, but the most important thing for you to know is that if Shlomo says the word 'lunchtime,' you must absolutely stop whatever you are doing and release him. Do you understand that much?"

I nodded. "So 'lunchtime' is our safe-word? And if he says it, I need to let him go?"

"Exactly," said Randy. "Lunchtime is the safe-word for the whole complex, but you can also choose one of your own. It should be a word that will never come up during sex." He ran his hands through his hair and inhaled deeply. "Your question is difficult, and only your slave can tell you the difference between being uncomfortable in a way that gives him pleasure and being genuinely uncomfortable with what you are doing to him.

"That is why he is the one who gets to decide when to use the safe-word. He always has the right to say no. In fact, if he says his safe-word and you don't stop, you will at minimum be banned for three months from having a slave or participating in any form of BDSM activity, either on-camera or off, and you will be required to go through special lessons before being allowed to participate again.

"The penalty can be worse if you actually hurt your boy. You could lose your contract, and you could be permanently banned from Frenetic. You must understand that continuing after a sub or a slave uses the safe-word is a kind of rape, and adults here, even older teens, can be sent to prison for violating the safe-word."

That sounded scary. I didn't want to hurt my new little cutie boy, not ever! "But what if he feels uncomfortable now?" I asked. "He has a gag on, so he can't say the safe-word, and maybe no one would hear him if he did. He can't even move his hands! Will I get in trouble?"

"I'm glad you asked that," he said. "I also mentioned safe gestures. When I whispered into little Shlomo's ear, I asked him to show me the safe gesture. He nodded twice, shook his head twice, then nodded twice again. Since he can't speak, and his hands are bound, he uses his head to make a safe gesture."

"But I'm in here with you!" I said, becoming frightened. "You suggested I lock him up outside! But I can't see his safe gesture from here!"

"That is taken care of," said Randy in a calm voice. "The hitching posts are in that location for a reason. The security office is right across the roadway in front of them. When a slave or sub is on the rack, a security officer watches constantly on a video monitor, looking for signs of a safe gesture. The officers also walk to the hitching post every ten minutes and check on the slave in person. If Shlomo makes a safe gesture, the officer will be with him in fifteen seconds to release him and see to his needs. They run as fast as they can if they see that."

"I see," I said.

"It's all in The First Time Master," he said.

A knock at the door announced the arrival of the pamphlets, which Randy handed to me.

***

"'Having your dreams come true isn't as easy as everyone thinks, is it, Hawk?' he asked. I shook my head and continued crying. I wasn't sad, but I felt lonely. Even in the arms of the man I loved so much, for some reason I was so terribly lonely."

Chapter 45
Back to Business

"Ok, down to business," Randy said while rubbing his hands together. "First, we need to discuss money again. I don't think you realize how much money you made in total today. For the live performance, you earned £24,000 for the basic fee. You also earned a very generous £36,000 in bonus pay. I say it is generous because Mr. Eastman is paying you first-time bonuses for doing ATM on Boris and again on me. Technically he should only pay that bonus once, because I was not your first ATM, but Mr. Eastman has been so pleased with your work here that he decided to give it to you anyway, and he tells me he plans to continue the practice for all of your first time bonuses. He really likes you, Hawk. So your fee for the performance is an even £60,000.

"Here's how that gets divided. The money for your basic fee goes into your trust, but you have to pay my commission first. That means you get £21,600 for your trust. Your bonus money all goes into your spending account, but again, I get my commission of that too, so you'll have £32,400 remaining for your spending account. But the big number for you is all that tip money! You received £47,200 in tips, which all goes toward your spending account, meaning you have £79,600 for your spending account, and £21, 600 for your trust. Your gross pay for that single hour's work was £107,200. There are people in the office looking into it, but that might be an all time record gross for a live show for anyone who has been here for less than a month. But we still have more money for you." My head was spinning fast. Surely these were just numbers.

"Shooting your promo film turned out to be quite a bit more lucrative than we had expected. The whole video only counts as a single scene, even though you did scenes with several people. But the basic pay was £7,000. Not bad." He was developing a sly smile. "Hawk," he said. "I want you to take a guess at how much bonus money you made on your promo video. Just guess."

"I dunno," I said. "I suppose for fisting those women, that was kinda nasty. Maybe I got something for that. And maybe because of Hannah's virginity?" He nodded with a growing smile. "I hadn't done those things before, so maybe £3,000?"

"Try £48,000 kiddo!" said Randy, hugging me close. "Hawk, you are an amazing phenomenon here. So many people wanted to be part of your promo video shoot, and they wanted to do a lot of K & F work, most of which was first time stuff for you. Those two women you fisted were worth exactly £20,000 alone. Pussy fisting, anal fisting, and going arm-deep are all considered separate acts, and they are worth a lot, plus the additional first time bonuses, which Eastman agreed to double for the two pussy fistings. He also agreed to pay your little gangbang as an actual gangbang, so you got £14,000 for that as well."

"Oh wow," I said. "That's… a lot."

"That's £55,000 for your promo film," he said. "We're also looking into whether that's a record. So, for the basic film fee, £6,300 goes into your trust after my commission, bringing that up to £27,900. For the bonuses, after commission, £43,200 is left for your spending account, bringing that to a total of £122,800. That means that so far today, you grossed £162,200, which might well be a record for single day total gross for a little."

"How could that be a record?" I asked. "I only worked half the day."

"It might be a record for a little," he said. "Remember, that means kids who are under nine years of age, or who look that young. Most littles don't want to do a lot of the things you have been doing comfortably, and we never push them. If a little does an anal scene, he is almost always the bottom, and he is usually with a man or an older boy. Very few littles can bottom a man's cock, and for most, bottoming for a teenage boy is too painful.

"On the rare occasion that Eastman and a director agree to try a new little as a bottom for a teenager, the director or the KCU supervisor often has to stop the scene. Eastman only agreed to let you bottom after I'd shown him some of the pictures of us from Sunday. He knew you could do it, and that you liked doing it. You are the only little I've known since Sebastian was your age who can do a gangbang with men. Not just men, but porn star men with big porn star cocks. You have to understand how rare that is." Was I really that unusual? The only one since Sebastian?

"Most littles are curious," he continued, "and you guys will try just about anything, but that means a little can easily get into a situation that feels overwhelming, and they don't handle it very well. I've learned a lot about you in these past few days, Hawk, and I decided to let you try some pretty exotic stuff, like fisting with Trish and Lena. I knew you might not like it, but I also knew how important it was for you to explore and learn for yourself who you are sexually. You seem to be the kind of boy who can have bad sex and still like it because it's sex.

"When some littles try something like that when they are new to porn, and they discover they don't like it, they can have much stronger reactions than you did. You just seemed a bit annoyed. Some littles can become sick. They can cry, or run away upset. It doesn't happen very often because we try to be careful, but when it does, it's very upsetting for everybody, especially the poor little.

"That's why so many people, including Linda, are watching you so closely, to make sure you are staying comfortable and safe. But the things you are doing while staying safe, and mostly comfortable, are extremely uncommon for a boy your age. I saw something in you when we first met. Do you remember me telling you that?"

"Yeah, I do. You say that a lot." I remembered that wonderful afternoon in the tree with Randy.

"Well, I didn't know you could do all the things you do," he continued. "I only saw your natural beauty, the way you move, and your sexual energy. I knew the camera would love you, and our viewers would go crazy. Mr. Eastman saw it too on your first day here. He knew how special you were. Put that together with the skills you have and your young age, and you are not only an incredible and lovely young boy, but an absolute phenomenon in child pornography. Are you beginning to see why people like Eastman and your director yesterday, Mr. Koolman, why they love you so much? Mostly they love you because you are Trevor, but they also love these extraordinary qualities you have as a porn actor." He smiled and ruffled my hair.

"The most difficult quality to understand is how perfectly the camera captures your beauty and your energy during a scene. Sometimes that doesn't happen. A boy can be truly beautiful and expressive, but he just doesn't look right in video. Directors can do a lot to make actors look better, but with you their job is easy. Even in bad lighting, you look dead sexy."

"That's because I am dead sexy! Ask Annie!" I said with a confident smile, still not believing half of what he had just said. Cameras love some boys but not others? I knew that wasn't true for a start. It was Randy's job to make sure I felt good in my new job, so I was sure he was making me sound way better than I was.

"Ok Hawk," he said. I'll ask him tomorrow. Now we need to have a difficult and serious talk about all this money. You have £122,800 for your spending account, but only £27,900 for your trust. That leaves you very vulnerable. Money in your trust account is safe and tax-free until it's taken out of the fund. Money sitting in your spending account is taxable unless you spend it on things for your work in child porn. Markus had a talk with me a short while ago, and he is very concerned about the situation. You could lose a lot of money. Remember about money that doesn't feel real? We need to consider that here. All of that money was transferred to Markus this afternoon, and he has a separate account for clients' money. He has deposited £20,000 into your spending account, and he would like to add the remaining £102,800 to your trust. It is not in your trust fund yet, and he can transfer as much as you like to your spending account with a single phone call. He wanted to hear back from us first though. Our contract says you are entitled to have all of that money in your spending account, but it also says you can choose to put as much as you like into your trust."

"What do you think I should do?" I asked the man I trusted more than anybody, even though he exaggerated a lot when he talked about me.

"I think you should do what your solicitor recommends. In fact, I would feel better if you kept only £10,000 in your spending fund, but I have to go with Markus. He's the expert on these things. He wants you to have enough money to have fun, and he wants you to celebrate your fantastic start in child pornography. He also thinks, and I agree, that you'll probably be spending most of that money on business items anyway, like sexy clothes and jewelry."

"That's so much money. I didn't think I'd ever see that kind of money. I sure didn't think I'd ever own so much of it. It feels a bit scary."

"If it feels scary, that's a very important sign that you need to trust the experts who work for you. It's their job to know what's best for you. I think that means you should do as Markus suggests."

I nodded, then suddenly I needed to run to the loo and throw up. I didn't quite make it all the way, and some of it made a mess on the floor. "Yes, Trevor Hawk's dressing room," I heard Randy say. "He's just been sick, and the lavatory floor needs cleaning," I heard Randy say. "I think he's fine. He's had a rather stressful day. Oh yes, that would be lovely; send him along. Trevor will be happy to see him again. Thank you."

I wiped my face with a towel and stepped out of the loo as Randy hung up the phone. I ran over to him and cried into his belly. He hugged me, and then picked me up and carried me to the settee. He cradled me in his lap. I didn't know why I was sick and crying. I just was.

"Having your dreams come true isn't as easy as everyone thinks, is it, Hawk?" he asked.

I shook my head and continued crying. A man came and cleaned out my loo in about five minutes, but I hardly noticed him. I cried right through his visit. Randy rocked me in his arms. "I love you Hawk," he said. "You'll understand all this soon enough. Just feel what you feel, and cry as much as you want to cry. I will be here, and I will love you when you are done just as much as I do now."

It's strange when you have to cry and cry, but you don't know why. I wasn't sad, but I felt lonely. Even in the arms of the man I loved so much, for some reason I was so terribly lonely.

"Do you remember Nurse Dan?" he asked, "the one who helped you when you were dehydrated?" I nodded without stopping my crying. "He will be dropping by in a few minutes to look you over, just in case there's a medical problem that made you sick. He's coming from the clinic, so it'll take a few minutes." Nothing mattered besides Randy and my confused feelings. I felt like a baby kangaroo, safe in its mother's pouch, all warm and comfortable, but still I cried.

Maybe that was the moment when everything changed for me? There had been several moments when I thought I had finally accepted my new life. Was this finally it? Had it finally hit me?

Without realizing it, I had stopped crying, and I was left with feelings of happiness and love. I felt at peace in Randy's strong arms. "Is my makeup ok?" I asked him.

He looked at me and laughed before kissing me sweetly. "It looks very pretty," he said. "They really chose the right stuff for you. It doesn't run at all."

"Good," I said. "I want to look pretty for Nurse Dan."

I answered the door myself when Nurse Dan knocked. "Well hello, my sweet, pretty boy!" said Dan as he offered me a hug. "I haven't seen you looking like this. It suits you! Hi Randy," he said, offering Randy a handshake. "So what's going on with our pretty young friend?" I loved it when people called me pretty, but when Nurse Dan called me pretty, my heart skipped a beat.

"Well, we were going over some business," Randy said, "when I think the stress of it all suddenly snuck up on him, so he had to run to the toilet and throw up."

"I tried," I said, "but I didn't make it all the way. Someone had to come and clean it up. But I cried and cried, and I don't know why."

"Oh my," said Nurse Dan. "That can be such a bother. Feelings can get confusing when you are new here, but there are a lot of people here who love you, so always ask for help if you need it."

I nodded and said, "Dr. Ben told me that too."

"That's good. Dr. Ben wants you to be happy and healthy too. Now, let's have a look at you," he said. He lifted me up and set me on my makeup table. "I'll need to do a lot of the same things we did yesterday." He took the temperature in my ear, then my blood pressure. He felt around my neck and throat. He had me say ah. He looked into my ears. Then he had me lie on the table while he pressed my belly in a few places, asking if it hurt. He used his stethoscope to listen to my belly.

I imagined I was naked, like I was the day before, only this time lying on a table for him while he played with my adorable body. But I knew he had to be a professional, and he couldn't do any of that just now. I also felt surprised for just an instant that I had been crying for so long, but here I was thinking about sex as soon as Nurse Dan entered the room. That wasn't right, was it?

"Ok, you can sit up now," he said with a smile. "Looks like your feelings got a little too strong for your body to handle. It happens sometimes. Your feelings can be so strong that parts of your body no longer work properly, like the part that keeps your food on the inside. I think the best thing for you to do is trust Randy here when it comes to business. He knows what's best, and that means you don't have to worry about things when you trust him. He gets paid to worry about business and money and all that, and he's very good at it. You get paid to look absolutely gorgeous! And you are both world-class experts at what you do," he said, tickling my belly.

As I giggled, he turned to Randy and said, "It looks like stress-related stomach upset. I don't see anything that indicates medical treatment, just some relaxation. He should be fine. He had a good cry, did he?"

"Yes I did," I said to him. "I cried and cried, and I didn't know why."

"That's your body's way of telling you to slow down and stop worrying so much," he said, poking my belly. "You only get to be a little boy once. Save the worrying for when you're Randy's age. Little boys should have fun."

He turned to Randy and said, "Try to help him stay on top of his stress. There are resources at the clinic for stress management in these little guys. Just call during the day and they'll connect you with whatever you need. When we get the new batch of kids in the fall, we'll start up the support group for new littles again. That seemed quite helpful to a lot of them, and you know we see a lot of this in new kids.

"Dr. Ben also recommends getting kids enrolled in regular fitness activity during the summer if they're struggling with stress or anxiety." I knew that every child actor at Frenetic was required to exercise for one hour each day except on weekends, but not during summer holidays. "Exercise can help reduce stress, and we have a lot of fun activities that don't really feel like exercise," he said with a wink to me. I think he noticed I was none too thrilled about a keep-fit program. "If he vomits again tonight or develops a fever or abdominal pain, call us right away, ok?"

"Ok," said Randy. "I'll drop by the clinic tomorrow and have a chat with your people about stress management and fitness. Thanks for coming out, Dan."

"And you!" Nurse Dan said, turning to me, "I want to see more of you looking gorgeously pretty and less of you being sick and worried, ok?"

"Ok," I nodded with a winking smile, sexily crossing my legs and blowing him a kiss.

***

"Do you think you're ok to talk business a little more, Hawk?" Randy asked me some while later. He was sipping his coffee, and I had my root beer. I was curled up on his lap again. He had been rocking me slowly, and it was in some ways like making love with Annie. I was in a different place. It was a beautiful place, and only Randy and I were there. It was the safest place in the world.

"No more money talk, please?" I asked. "That's just too weird to think about now. Just do what Markus said with the money, and then can we talk about something different please?"

"Certainly," said Randy. "I think that's a wise decision. The next thing we need to talk about is your living situation. You are all signed up for room 46, so you can sleep there tonight if you'd like. You have been assigned to room 212 in the DAB."

"The DAB?" I asked.

"Sorry," he said. "The Dormitory Accessory Building. It's usually called the Accessory Tower, but that's not its proper name. It's the tallest building on the lot, so people call it a tower," he explained. "If you would like two rooms connected to each other, there are still some available in the upper floors. Remember, that's an extra two hundred quid per month, but I think you can handle that. It will be paid from your trust."

"Oh yes, please!" I said. "I want two rooms. I want to make a studio in one of them, just like your studio! And I want to have a place to put my things too, and a computer room, and a private place for Annie and me, and a play room, and… all sorts of things!"

"That sounds just fine," said Randy. "Just draw a simple picture of where you want things." He handed me a piece of paper with the outlines of the two rooms printed on it. At the top of the page was my name, along with the room numbers 1208 and 1210. "It doesn't have to be perfect, or even good. The architects know how old you are, and they can work with whatever kind of drawing you give them. They will make a design and walk you through it with a computer model before they start building. Then the interior designers will want to meet you to get to know your personality and the kinds of things you want in the rooms. They will add their ideas to the computer model. You can change things however you like, and you will see the changes on the computer right away, so it should be a quick process."

"I want pretty boys on all my walls!" I said, feeling excited that talking about business could actually be fun. "And I want big posters of Boris and Sebastian and Robbie and Adrian… and maybe other boys too, but not Annie."

"Why not Annie?"

"He's special," I said, feeling myself blush. "I don't want to show him off naked to everyone. I want to be with him and love him and keep him special. I want pictures of him on my shelves and on my walls, but I want them to be pretty pictures of the boy I love, not sexy pictures of a boy I want to fuck."

"Hawk, that is a very sweet sentiment," he said. "Of course all actors here have promo posters and many photographs you could use, so I'll get anyone you need. The decorators will have them framed for you too. Some of them even have old paintings of them in storage. You would need to get their permission to use them though. You should also know these rooms are on the top level of the building, the twelfth floor. The view is beautiful, overlooking the complex, but the lifts can take a minute or two to get to you."

"Oh that sounds lovely!" I said. "I don't mind the lifts, really. You know I like to be up high!"

"How could I forget!" he said, rumpling my hair, which must have become thoroughly messy by that point. "I'll let them know you want the twelfth floor DAB rooms. And give some thought to whether you want to stay in your dorm room tonight or come back to my place." I nodded. "Tonight I need to visit your mother and inform her that you won't be living there anymore. I'm sure that will be an interesting visit, but I don't want you there. Things can sometimes get ugly when we have talks like that with parents, especially if there's alcohol involved, and I need to keep you away from all that for now. Like Dan said, I get paid to worry about those things, and you get paid to look gorgeous." He smiled and kissed me.

There was a knock at the door. "Come in," called Randy. "Hello Markus," he said to my attorney as he entered the room.

After they shook hands, I jumped up into Markus' arms, put my arms around his neck, and gave him a big, sloppy kiss. "Hi Markus!" I said. "We're having a business meeting again. Are you here for our meeting?" I asked.

"I'm here for part of it, Trevor," he said. "For now I'll just wait quietly until we get to my part. Is that all right?" I nodded with a smile. I liked Markus a lot. He played along during my victory drive, the drive in the limousine where we drank champagne and celebrated my new contract with Frenetic. I don't know if it's normal for a victory drive, but we also had a lot of sex, and Markus was fun! He did everything I told him to do.

"We were just getting to Hawk's schedule for tomorrow," Randy said to Markus. The latter nodded and opened his briefcase, then sat quietly. "Ok Hawk, you and I will start at 8:30 with some voiceover work in recording studio C. That's the small room with the best voiceover equipment."

"The one that made my ears feel funny?" I asked. I didn't know it then, but the voiceover studios had materials in them to absorb sound, nearly all of it. It can be difficult to talk to someone if they are even ten feet away. The music studios weren't as weird, but they still had that feel. They were also much larger. One was large enough for a full orchestra to record.

"No, that was studio D, but your ears will still feel funny, maybe even funnier. Studio C is the best voice studio in the complex, and possibly in the whole London Metro area. You will be adding some narration to your promo video, like you did for the live show this afternoon. There will be very little for you to say, but they will probably want to record everything several times. They will also want to try different microphones to see which one best captures the uniqueness of your voice. Everybody's voice is different, so different microphones might be better for different voices. We have blocked out a two hour recording session, though you will likely be done much sooner."

"Ok," I said, taking a sip of root beer. "If all I have to do is talk, that sounds easy."

"Yes and no," said Randy. "Remember, having sex is also easy, but filming a scene is much more complicated than just having sex. You have to learn to control when you cum and when you are hard, you need to keep your hair away from your face so the camera can see you, you have to keep your sightlines open to the cameras, you have to do scenes again and again until the director thinks it's just right, and maybe you aren't even attracted to the person you're working with." I nodded, wondering where this was going.

"Well, your voiceover work for the live show wasn't very critical. You had very few lines to read, and it was ok if they didn't sound perfectly polished. However, your promo video needs everything to be professional and perfect. The surprising thing is that it needs to sound like you're having a chat with a friend, and we can all do that, but when you're in a studio with people looking at you with a script and a microphone in front of you instead of a friend, it takes practice to sound natural. You'll do just fine," he said, reading the look of worry on my face.

"Everybody involved has made hundreds of these promo videos for new kids your age, and they all want you to be relaxed and happy. They will put you at ease. They are not scary at all. I will be there with you as well. The worst part of it is that you will probably become bored at some point because we'll have to pause several times to work out technical issues that you won't have to worry about, and it can take a while before we get back to recording when we do that. That means a lot of waiting."

"Ok," I said. I wasn't worried when Randy was with me.

"Ok, that gets us to 10:30. That's an important time in our schedule," he said with a smile that somehow didn't seem sincere. That made me think that bad news was to follow. "That's also why Markus is here." Markus nodded without smiling. "Earlier today, after the live performance, you were sexually assaulted by Beauregard Buford."

"He didn't assault me," I said. "He just grabbed my cock, and Raoul pulled him away."

"Hawk," said Randy, "you don't understand yet why such a thing is so very serious. You will understand one day, I don't know when, but it is very, very serious. Your body is your own. You decide who touches you sexually, and it doesn't matter if you are sitting naked in front of him after doing a live sex show, or even if they've tipped you £10,000. That is the most sacred rule in the child porn business. Nobody ever touches a child sexually without that child's permission. He robbed you of control over your sexuality. That is a kind of rape, and it must never be allowed.

" I know you don't really understand why that rule means so much to everyone. That's why you have people like Raoul and like me looking after you, and Markus too. If people like Buford got away with assaults like that, child porn actors everywhere would be at risk. Then our whole industry would be in danger. It must not be allowed ever. Children must always be kept safe from any form of unwelcome sexual touch. Always. And not just in the child porn business. I mean all children everywhere, always."

I nodded and said, "Ok, I guess you know what's best, but what happens at 10:30?"

"At 10:30, a detective inspector from the Metropolitan Police will be visiting the studio, and she needs to ask you about what happened," said Markus.

I know I looked scared. I sure felt scared. "Why? Randy said it was all on video!"

"Yes, it was all recorded on video, but there was a lot of talking in the room, and you weren't wearing a microphone. That means the video can't tell us what you said to Mr. Buford. So without a statement from you, the victim, they might not be able to bring charges," said Markus.

"What if I don't want them to bring charges?"

Randy hugged me and rocked me again. "All of this stress and fear that you are feeling right now is part of how he hurt you. When he touched you, he made you the victim of a crime, and being the victim of a crime is never fun. It means you have to work with the police when you'd rather be playing with your new pet boy. It means you have to tell your story to the detectives, and maybe even to a magistrate, though it shouldn't come to that," he said. "It means you might feel sick and have to throw up again sometime because it's stressful. He did that to you. He put you in this position."

"Hawk, the law does not require you to say anything to the detective," said Markus, "but if you don't tell your story to the detective, Mr. Buford might get away with his crime. When people get away with crimes like this, it makes it easier for others to commit the same crimes against other child porn actors, and even worse crimes. I know it's difficult to understand, but if you don't speak with the inspector, other kids might be assaulted by Beauregard Buford. It wouldn't be your fault if that happened, but you have the opportunity to prevent that by helping us to put Mr. Buford in prison. I know it feels like a lot of pressure, and you don't understand all the fuss, but you should also know the visit with the inspector will not be like anything you've seen on the telly. It's really not a lot of fuss, and it could do a great deal of good for a lot of children. I spoke with the inspector this afternoon. Her name is Detective Inspector Judith MacAdams, and she's really quite nice."

"Is she from Scotland Yard?" I asked, now feeling a little awe-stricken.

"Yes, she is. She is with the Criminal Investigations Division of the Metropolitan Police Service. Her office is indeed in Scotland Yard."

"Wow," I said. "I bet she's solved loads of murders!"

Markus chuckled and kissed me again. "You watch too much telly, you little sweetie! There really aren't as many unsolved murders as television would have us believe. Besides, Inspector MacAdams doesn't work homicides. She works for what they call the 'pedophile unit.' It has a longer name, but that's not important."

"Is Mr. Buford a pedophile?" I asked.

"He is, and so am I, and so is Randy, and so is everyone else who likes children sexually," he said. "That's what a pedophile is, but that is not a crime. The crime is when a pedophile forces a sex act onto the child, or acts without permission. That is a very serious crime, and that is exactly what Mr. Buford did."

"How can I tell the inspector what she wants to know if I don't understand what was so bad about it?"

"She will want to know only one thing from you, Trevor. She only wants to know what happened. You can even tell her you didn't think it was so bad if it will help you feel better about telling her what happened. You let her worry about the seriousness of the crime and all the details. And remember, you won't be alone. Randy will be there with you as your guardian, and I will be there as your attorney."

Randy put his arm around me and gave me a quick side hug. "All the inspector will do is ask you to tell her, in your own words, what happened. She might ask a few questions to clarify what you've said, but that's all. You just tell her what happened in your own words. She will ask you if she needs to know more about something. If you don't know the answer, tell her you don't know. You can do that, can't you, Trevor?"

"You make it sound so easy. Just talking is all?"

"Just talking," he said. I would be just talking all morning, in the studio and with the inspector, and I wasn't looking forward to either.

"Inspector MacAdams' assistant will be typing down what you say into his computer," Markus continued. "When you are done, the assistant will print a copy. You and I will read that copy, Randy too, if he wants, and if you agree that everything on the page is true, you and I will sign it. That's it. It's only that. Tell the inspector what happened, answer any questions she might have, then read and sign the paper, if it's all true. If there is a mistake on the paper, tell me, even if it's a small mistake, and we will correct it and print a new copy before you sign it. There is no need to think too much or worry about anything. Remember, Randy gets paid to worry, and I get paid to think over the legal details." He smiled and kissed me. "And what do you get paid for?"

"For looking super-sexy and absolutely gorgeous!" I said, winking at him and blowing him a kiss.

"That's right! So, that will take about twenty minutes…"

"Twenty minutes?" I asked with surprise.

"How long do you think it will take for you to tell the inspector what happened?" he asked.

"Well, I guess I could say what happened in about a minute," I said. "There wasn't much to it really, and it only took a few seconds, but she'll have all sorts of questions, won't she? Don't I have to say I swear on a bible that I'm telling the truth and all that stuff? Won't they need my fingerprints and a DNA sample?"

Markus and Randy both laughed at my questions. "I hope you spend more time here making videos than you do watching the television," said Markus. "No, you won't need to do any of those things, and I don't think she'll have very many questions. This is only a victim's statement, not a deposition. That's a longer and more complicated process, and it shouldn't be necessary. This is quick and easy. She told me to plan on ten minutes for Randy and twenty minutes for you, and that's only because you are so young, and you will have your solicitor and your guardian with you. Sometimes we lawyers also have questions for the detective, so it can take longer, but still twenty minutes should be enough."

I took another sip of my root beer, wondering how it could be so easy to put someone in prison, just with a twenty minute chat. "Ten minutes for you?" I asked, turning to Randy. "You need to see her too?"

"Yes," he said. "Before you go in to see Inspector MacAdams, she needs to hear my statement of what happened. You were the victim, and I was a witness. I was right there and I saw it very clearly. I am also your guardian, and she might want to ask me some questions about your home and your general safety. Unfortunately, I've had to do this before. That's how I know how quick it can be. You will have a few hours of free time after our visit with the inspector."

"Maybe I should draw some pictures of my rooms in the ADB?"

"That sounds like a great idea, but remember, it's the DAB, not the ADB." We both had a giggle.

"Do you have any more questions for me, Trevor?" Markus asked.

"I don't think so," I said.

"Very well then," he said, rising to his feet. "You will find this easier than you might think, I am sure. If you think of any questions, call me any time. I will always answer my phone if you call from your new cell phone," he said.

"Um… ok," I said. I didn't want to tell him I hadn't learned how to use my cell phone yet.

He leaned over and we kissed goodbye. He shook Randy's hand and said, "I'll need to know as soon as possible about the accounts and tax plan."

"Ok," said Randy, walking him to the door. "I'll see you shortly for our visit with Mrs. Hawkinson tonight. I'll fill you in on the way."

"Ok," said Markus. "See you soon."

Randy closed the door and came back to sit with me. "Back to tomorrow's schedule. I will have to leave you alone after we are done with the inspector. I need to be at a meeting in the office building until lunchtime. I would like you to have a plan for the time in between. You are going to draw some pictures for your rooms. Can you think of anything else you'd like to do during that time?"

"Can I go for a ride in the helicopter?"

"What an excellent idea!" he said. "I'll speak with our aviation staff and set that up, if the helicopter is available. If it's not available, maybe you could visit the school and speak with some of the staff there. You could get a tour and learn how they do things. They might even have a tutor to assign to you if you don't want to wait until fall term begins. The sooner you begin, the sooner you will graduate."

"Ok," I said, with a clear lack of enthusiasm. Who wanted to go to school during summer holidays?

"That gets us to lunch. I'll meet you in the dining area, along with Sebastian and Boris, and your little sweetheart Annie as well." I blushed, but I couldn't think of anything in the world that I would rather be embarrassed about.

"After lunch, you and I will have another busy day."

There was a knock at my door. "Come in," I called.

"What hell for forget we friends?" said Sebastian with his huge smile, naked and pretty, as usual. I bounced over to him and gave him a big kiss, and he didn't let me go until he'd gotten a nice, long hug from me.

"See for meetings with business?" asked Boris, dressed in black, as usual. I threw my arms around his neck and kissed him. I really loved him, even though he dressed in such depressing clothes.

"Hi boys!" said Randy, giving them each a kiss. "We were just going over Hawk's schedule for tomorrow, and I need to talk to you boys as well. Sebastian, you're shooting your second scene tomorrow morning with Baron Gargantua and Amber. That's studio 5. Boris, they gave you the part in that new ladyboy film, The Ladyboys and the Lazy Boy. You begin in the morning, studio 9. Congratulations!"

Randy tossed each of them a script. Boris smiled and punched the air happily. "Yes! Is great happy for make ladyboy film again!" he said. "Fluff for them many time, but not asking Boris for act in film. Now, ask!"

***

"Boys," said Randy, "now that you two have joined us," gesturing to Sebastian and Boris, "I want to change the subject for a few minutes. I stopped by the Rectum Center at the clinic today to find out about IAH." Sebastian and I snapped to attention. "Dr. Gupta was very eager to talk to me about you two." He pointed to Sebastian and me. "You all know that Dr. Gupta is a researcher as well as a specialist. Well, he is actually the person who first discovered IAH, and he's the one who gave it that name. IAH stands for…" he said as he retrieved a card from his wallet, "idiopathic alimentary hypotonia."

We all giggled a little when we heard Randy struggle to say the technical words. Then he nodded and said, "That's exactly what I thought when he told me the name. I thought you might like to hear me try to pronounce it, just for fun. Apparently doctors understand this language, but he gave me a plain English translation." Then he looked at Boris and Sebastian and said, "Sorry Boys, but I can't help you with the Russian name. Boris, when you see Vlad tomorrow, you might ask him for a translation."

"Oh, please do for me, Boris!" said Sebastian. "Maybe write for paper and we have fun!" Boris rolled his eyes before nodding.

"What this means in English," continued Randy, "is that your whole digestive tract, from your mouth to your anus, is really a long tube covered with muscles, and people with IAH have muscles that are unusually relaxed for some unknown reason. Normally, these muscles are always just a little tight. They can relax to a certain extent, which is what happens when you are opened up for anal, but they don't ever relax completely. That's what keeps them from opening more than they do. That's also what makes anal penetration hurt so much for some people, and why it hurts when someone with a cock or a toy that's too big fucks you." He glanced at Sebastian and me and said, "Well, it hurts most people anyway, and it hurts a lot. Those muscles are always squeezing back when they are stretched."

I knew from Dr. Gupta that my anus had two muscles, one that I could control and one that I couldn't, and Dr. Gupta told me several times that it was important to relax the one I couldn't control by stretching it and using smaller toys or a finger first. I wasn't sure, but I thought this was what Randy was getting at, that my ass muscles were really easy to open up, and they could open up much wider than other kids' ass muscles because they relaxed super-easy, and that also made them not hurt.

"In IAH, those muscles are able to relax almost completely. That means your anus, rectum, colon, and throat can stretch open wide enough to take in the largest cocks in the business without all of that muscle-stretching pain that makes it impossible for most people." Yes, that sounded like what I was thinking. He started talking in such technical language, but he was good at explaining things. Again, he really understood boys.

"Sebastian, Dr. Gupta says you definitely have IAH. He told me more too. He said you have the…" pausing to look at the card again, "the annular type. That means that it's only the muscles that circle around that long tube, the one that makes your rectum, colon, esophagus, and everything else in your digestive tract, that are unusually relaxed. That's a good thing, because it's those muscles that are stretched during anal sex and deep-throating.

"The other kind of muscles that cover your digestive tract go along the length of your rectum and esophagus and other organs, following them in a straight line. They are normal, which helps your intestines to move the food you eat down the line in a mostly ordinary way. Your regular exercises, dietary fiber, and enemas as needed should keep everything working just fine." Sebastian grinned and nodded.

"Hawk, Dr. Gupta thinks you might have IAH, but he isn't sure. During your exam, he found there are some limits to how much you can comfortably open, but there are several possible reasons that might have happened. He also wanted me to tell you that most kids with IAH can't open as wide as Sebastian, so those limits might not mean much." Seeing my confusion, he added, "When I said 'those limits,' I meant that you can only open so far before it hurts. Sebastian can open more than anyone Dr. Gupta has ever seen." Good! That meant Sebastian could still do things that nobody else could, and I wouldn't be taking roles from him.

"Dr. Gupta would like to do more tests on you, Hawk, but he has signed a special release for you to do extreme anal twice per week, and more if you like, but only if there is absolutely no pain. He said that, even if you don't have IAH, you have a very… what was the word he used… oh yes. He said you have a very elastic anus and rectum.

"He did not test your throat, but he said that if you feel no pain while you are deep-throating a penis, then you are not in danger of hurting yourself, so no need to worry about that. For now, he doesn't want you deep-throating any toys larger than fifty-five millimeters, and then only the softer gel ones." That was fine with me. How could I make a dildo feel good by deep-throating it?

"All of the dildos supplied by the Props Department, Fluff Services, and the gift shop have their size marked on the package and on the base of the dildo, so you can become familiar with how big that is. You should look them over when you get a chance. I guess it's easier to hurt yourself with a dildo down your throat than a cock because cocks are softer."

"What mean for all this then?" asked Sebastian. I had understood some of what Randy had just told us, but not all of it. It seemed Sebastian only understood some of it too.

"It means two things," said Randy. "First, it means neither of you is in danger of injuring yourselves just because you can stretch open so wide without pain. If you feel no pain, you will not be injured, so no worries. But if you feel pain, stop immediately. That means you too, Hawk." Randy knew I was trying new things, and that there had already been a couple times when I should have called hold but didn't.

"Sebastian, you can continue as you have been doing. Do whatever you like, as long as it doesn't hurt. And remember to see the dietician about fiber." Sebastian nodded.

"Hawk, for you this means it's more important than ever that you stop anal or deep-throating if you feel pain. I can't stress this enough. Your muscles will stretch easily, but your throat and your intestines will only stretch so far. When you feel that pain, you cannot be stretched or opened any more, not even slowly. Dr. Gupta says that pain can be very severe, and it's very difficult, but not impossible, to continue past the point of pain in your throat or your rectum.

He said people injure themselves all the time because they don't stop when they need to. Your colon is more easily injured than your rectum, and it doesn't sense pain very well, so stay away from long toys. Remember, any injuries from tearing these body parts can be very dangerous and very painful." I nodded to show him I understood.

"IAH is an exceedingly rare condition, and it's not a bad one for you boys to have in your line of work. Hawk, if you do have IAH, you will need to exercise like Sebastian does every day. Dr. Gupta says it would be a good idea for you to do the exercises anyway, just because you are so… elastic. Sebastian can show you his routine, and maybe you two can make it fun together. Keeping your sphincter strong is important for people with IAH. If it's not strong, you could have accidents before you get to the toilet."

"I told Dr. Gupta I'd had accidents when I was little!" I said. "This must be why! Mum thought I just liked having poopy pants, but I was also sick with a runny bottom." It was odd how comfortable I felt saying that. Four days earlier, I could never have imagined saying such a thing in front of other people. It would have been incredibly embarrassing. But these people were my new family, and they would never make fun of me.

"That might be true, Hawk," Randy said. "I couldn't tell you. Dr. Gupta's the expert, not me. But I do want to tell you the second thing that IAH means for you two. It means that Dr. Gupta wants to study your bodies to learn more about IAH. Hawk, I told him I would give my consent after you and I discussed the matter, and only if you want to do it. Sebastian, Dr. Gupta will need to get consent from Mr. Bumbayev. His colleagues in Prague will contact Mr. Bumbayev to discuss this with him, but I think he will also consent, but only if you want to participate. I'll speak with him too."

"Who is Mr. Bumbayev?" I asked.

"Is Daddy!" said Boris. "Sebastian tell for you about him live now for our house in Czechia, and Boris Daddy now gorjidan for Sebastian."

"Is guardian, no gorjidan," said Sebastian.

"Gardan," said Boris. "Is no easy for learn English."

I felt embarrassed again. Of course Boomboy was not Boris' real name! He had a working name just like I had.

***

"Now to an even more serious matter," said Randy. "Boris, you saw what Buford did to Trevor after the live performance, right?" asked Randy.

"Saw all," said Boris. "Filthy is bastard should go for hell." It seemed clear that Boris understood why it was such a bad thing that Mr. Buford had done. Maybe he could help me understand. I thought maybe I'd ask him sometime.

"There will be a detective here tomorrow, and she will want your statement. I'm afraid you will have to take time from lunch. It should only take fifteen minutes or so, but it's very important. Your director wouldn't release you early on the first day of shooting, and I didn't want to press the issue and endanger your new role. The detective has scheduled a Russian interpreter, and Vlad from KCU will also be there to make sure everything is perfectly clear in your statement. It should be just like last time. You will speak only in Russian, and only to Vlad. He will print your statement in Russian. Then you and Vlad will sign it if it is correct. You only sign the Russian statement. Vlad and the police interpreter will both sign the English translation."

"This interptret is all fucking," said Boris, a frustrated look on his face. "English good for work, no good for tell police lady Buford is for sick pervert?" Sebastian began stroking his shoulder.

"I know," said Randy in a calm voice. It was obvious to him, and to me, that Boris' English was horrible, but now wasn't the time to tell Boris that. "Your English is just fine," he said, "but this is extremely important. We cannot leave any doubt about what happened. I really think it's best. Inspector MacAdams said she would also be very grateful. You can have your own solicitor there too if you like. You have that right. Remember, Vlad works for KCU, not for you, though he will certainly look out for you."

"Is ok," said Boris. "No need sleecitur man. Will talk for police lady. If police get filthy pig shit man for prison, is good. Talk for Vlad. He good guy, Vlad."

"So Sebastian and Boris will be shooting scenes in the morning, and Hawk and I will be doing our business. We'll meet in the studio dining area for lunch. After lunch, Sebastian, you have nothing scheduled. You can look for fluff work if you like, or enjoy an afternoon off. Boris, you'll be shooting the second scene already for the ladyboy film. I guess they want to get that one out fast. If they can, they want to try to shoot two scenes in that studio during the afternoon, and you're in both of them. Make sure you choose a good FSP. They'll be expecting a few high quality money shots from you, and I know you want to keep getting these ladyboy scenes."

Boris looked at Sebastian and raised his eyebrows. "Of course, want for Sebastian, if Sebastian want also."

"Make hard for you cock like rock!" Sebastian boasted. "Make ready cum five time for hour!"

"Well," said Randy, "that's you two sorted out. Trevor, your afternoon is going to be a fun one. First, you and I will go to the office building for a screening of a rough draft of your promo video. The editing department has already begun to put that together. I think we should give them some footage of your new pet boy though, just walking him around. It shows how versatile you can be." I had forgotten about Shlomo already! He was still outside, attached to the rack.

"I think he should be cleaned up first though. We want him to look absolutely as cute as possible because it shows the viewer that you are the kind of boy who is worthy of a prize pet. And it's true. Like I told you, since he began in the winter, nearly everyone has tried to collar him, but you got him. The really little cuties are the ones everybody wants.

"Where was I… oh yes," said Randy, remembering his place. "Hawk, the screening will take only an hour or so. It begins promptly at 2:00, so we should end our lunch a little early. It will be the same screening room we used this morning for our little home movie, The Dipstick. Be ready to hear lots of criticism. The artistic director and the producers will be there, along with members of the PRC, that's the Public Relations Committee, and Mr. Eastman as well.

"There will also be various other directors present to see who the new boy is and to offer their artistic advice. Mr. Koolman said he'd try to be there. You might even see some of the owners and investors you've already met, and a few other executives and artistic designers you haven't met. They want comments from as many professionals as they can get.

"Your initial screening will likely be very well attended because of the impression you have made so far. Once we've seen the film, we will go to the large conference room to discuss it. That room will probably be crowded.

"Remember, these people are all artists, and they are very good at what they do. They want things to be just perfect, because this is the short film that will introduce you to industry executives and fans around the world, not just the distributors who were at the live performance this afternoon. The video will also be included as a bonus feature with all of your video releases during your first six months with Frenetic. We'll make a new one then. After that it will always be free for download at the studio's website. It is a crucial stepping-stone for your career, and that is where their passion will be coming from."

He paused, looked me directly in the eye, and said, "Be ready, Hawk. They will speak their minds as if you weren't even there. They have to do that in order to make this the best film possible. They will not worry about hurting anybody's feelings, and you might not like what they say. You must remember that all of their comments are about the film, and not about you. They already love you. No one there wants to hurt your feelings, but they need to speak honestly about the parts of the film that need to be improved, and they are not always delicate about it. They know you are an absolute treasure, even if they don't tell you. This is only about how we package that absolute treasure. They are there to discuss the film, not you. I will sit right next to you the whole time."

"Ok," I said. I had to stop worrying. Randy knew best. But I was worried anyway. Money, learning how to record my voice in front of people I didn't know, talking to the detective so I can make a man go to prison, people arguing over how stupid my promo video looks – of course I was worried!

"Then at 4:30, we have a very special treat," said Randy, brightening up. "You've already got another live show!"

"Really?" I said. Suddenly I'd forgotten to worry. I could hardly believe it! I loved working in front of people, and the money was terrific. "Who is it with? I mean… what… Tell me about it please!"

"Oh, you are going to like this," he said, looking as if he had a fillet steak hiding behind his back, about to give it to a hungry dog. "Of course, you remember those two Japanese boys from this afternoon, Hiro and Kenji?"

"Oh, of course, they were really sweet! It was so nice they were in my promo video!"

"Well, Eastman is using the footage from your promo film shoot as their on-camera audition, and he has offered them a contract. They haven't left the lot here all day. But the first thing their father wants to do is pay for a live show with you and his two boys, because he thought you were so nice to them earlier, and he thinks you are incredibly sexy. His boys wanted to do something with you as well for their first scene in child porn, so Daddy-san is paying out-of-pocket for this one. This will be your £9,000 scene, so you will earn a basic fee of £36,000 plus tips."

"That's so much money," I said, "and I'm not going to think about it or I might have to throw up again, ok?"

"Of course it's ok," he said. "But do you think you can handle even more good news?" I smiled and nodded. "Hiro and Kenji are going to move into your dorm room and take the two beds left by the Harlow boys. They couldn't believe their luck when they heard there were two beds side-by-side available in the same room with Trevor Hawk! Your room is full, and you have two very cute Japanese boys who adore you as roommates."

"Wow!" I said. "We're going to have a lot of fun at bedtime! And Yvgenia will be so happy to have all the beds full again, and with more boys! She likes boys," I said. "She's not a lesbian." Then I thought a moment and asked, "You said that was my £9,000 scene, but what about my £8,000 scene?"

"We'll get to that in a minute," he said. "From the sound of things, Hiro and Kenji's dad will be flying half of Japan in to watch your live show. He is very proud of his boys being signed with the most prestigious studio in the UK, but he wants you to decide what to do for the scene. He wants you to come up with a script, tell them what to wear, what props to use, everything. I know you love those two cuties, so really all you need to do is imagine your greatest fantasy with them, write it down, and we'll make it happen, ok?"

"What if I want to do something they think is stupid?" I asked, feeling worried again.

"Hawk, you're not just a little, you're still a little boy," said Randy, calmly. I didn't like being called a little boy in those days, but I would soon learn to appreciate the status it brought me. "Mr. Watanabe doesn't expect an expert production. Everything you do is cute to him. As long as no one gets hurt, the audience will love whatever you do. If you don't have anything by lunch tomorrow, I'll help you put something together, ok?"

"Can Nellie give them special undies to wear?" I asked, feeling a boner coming on.

"Of course, Hawk," said Randy. "You can use all of the studio resources. What did you have in mind?"

"I want Hiro to have yellow bikini undies, but really sparkly, and I want Kenji to have light blue ones, also really sparkly. And I want a flame pattern in the front done in sequins that are the same color blue and yellow, only super sparkly!"

I had said all of that quite fast, and I was a bit embarrassed that Randy and the boys were trying to hide their giggles. Yes, I had thought a lot about them since the afternoon, and yes, I'd already had several very nice fantasies about them.

"Once we tend to your pet boy and get a little video footage with him," Randy said, "we'll visit the costume shop and get things set up. They've got people here round the clock."

"Props and scenery too?" I asked.

"You do have this worked out, don't you!" said Randy. "Sure, props and scenery too. And if you need to do any voiceovers, just go to the studios in the Office building again and ask at the desk. There's usually one or two open with engineers."

***

Randy took a deep breath, and I could feel an announcement coming. "Boys, I have some excellent news. Frenetic Studios has bought The Dipstick!" We all cheered. "You will all receive your fees and bonuses as if you'd shot the film here, and each of you will get co-producer credits and fees, as well as a percentage of the sales. Boys, this is going to make us all a lot of money."

"My £8,000 scene?" I asked.

"Your £8,000 scene. Sebastian, you get an extra £2,000 K & F bonus for two deep throats, and you as well, Trevor, but you also get £4,000 additional for your two deep throats being your first time ever doing deep throat. Remember, Eastman wants you to get first time bonuses for everyone you do in your first scenes. Each of you also gets another £20,000 as co-producers. So Hawk, you and Sebastian each get £34,000, which brings Hawk's gross for today up to £196,200…" An explosion of cheers came from my new Russian friends. I was a bit numb. "…and Boris, sorry, no bonus money for you, so you get £32,000. But I did manage to swing an additional £500 for you as a camera operator and editing assistant." That made Boris laugh. "The film will be re-edited and remastered, and a music score will be added, but we have to shelf the film until after St. Felix Academy is out. That is your film debut, Hawk."

"Shelf the film? I asked.

"Oh yes," said Randy. "That's jargon. It means we won't release it until after we release St. Felix Academy." What did that matter? I probably had enough money to retire already – certainly enough to buy Big Ben. And I had two extremely cute Japanese boys to sleep with at night and to work with the next day!

"Once this film is released," Randy continued, "Each of you will receive one pound for each unit sold, whether it's Blu Ray, streaming, or some other format. I don't think we're bothering with DVD anymore, maybe in Kazakhstan or something. You get these fees because you are co-producers. This is child porn, Hawk, and Frenetic only makes the very best. This stuff costs the customers a lot more than adult porn, and Frenetic is usually a little more expensive than other studios, so you get a very nice cut of the sales. For public performances, such as in a cinema or in a pub of some sort, you will receive one pound for every five audience members. For broadcasts, except pay-per-view, you will also receive one pound per five viewers as estimated by a ratings agency. For pay-per-view, you get one pound for each subscriber. Trust me boys, that will add up fast."

***

We each had champagne from a few of the half-bottles I had kept in my dressing room refrigerator. It was time to celebrate! It was no small feat to make a film and sell it to Frenetic instead of BIA, which is the division Frenetic uses for most of the films they buy from Frenetic employees. Never in my life had I been so nervous and worried yet so happy at the same time.

Something had to give, right?

***

Addendum

My days at Frenetic were still very emotional. It was difficult to tell when I was doing the right thing because it seemed everything I did before I met Randy was the wrong thing. The better things felt, the stronger my anxieties got. Still, I felt incredibly good about my new life, and so much more good was yet to come.

I learned I might have a rare condition that allows me to stretch wide open for even the biggest cocks. I told Randy I'd like to let Dr. Gupta study my body. Mr. Bumbayev also signed a consent form, and Sebastian also agreed to be studied. I would get to see more of Nurse Blaine that way, and I wanted to know everything I could about the things I could do with my stretchy parts, even if I didn't have IAH. But the possibility of having IAH felt uncomfortable in one way. Sebastian was Frenetic's boy with the magic ass. I didn't want to take parts from him, like other boys did. I wanted him to keep all those roles, at least while he was still with Frenetic, which meant until the end of summer. Thinking about Sebastian and Boris leaving then made me sad.

I had begun taking a lot of risks. I fell hard in love with Annie. If things went wrong (and they so easily could have), we would both be devastated. I couldn't imagine life if that happened. I had also taken a slave. It made me feel better to call him my pet boy, but he was a slave. I was naive back then, and I thought having a slave was pretty cool. I thought it made me seem more important. I didn't realize how important I already was without Shlomo on my leash.

Those aren't the best reasons for taking a slave, but I think Randy understood me very well. He was watching me closely, and he knew I needed to experiment and find myself. Like he said, that was why he suggested I take a risk and try something new with Trish and Lena. It wasn't really as nasty as I thought it was then. In fact, I have since done it again, though not up to my shoulder. It makes a difference if you do a thing with someone you know after thinking about it for a few days instead of doing it on the spur of the moment.

It also made a difference to me that I had gotten to know a lot of people who did BDSM. They liked talking to me about what they did and why. I've never been into it, but I've done several films with a BDSM theme.

Being surrounded by people bickering over what made me look or sound good or bad was difficult to take. Talking to the detective was also a very difficult experience, knowing that the things I said would put a man in prison. But there was also a lot of fun! I went to Hiro and Kenji's signing party, and I made my decision about where I wanted to spend the night. I'll tell you now, I'm very glad I made that decision, because that night was a night to remember! I also went shopping with Yvgenia, and I had my first helicopter ride. But the best part was definitely my live show with Hiro and Kenji. Where else but in child porn can a boy take his hottest fantasy, write it down on paper, and make it come true?

I didn't fully appreciate all of these risks, but I loved and trusted the people around me. Randy had been letting me stretch myself because he knew how important it was for me to find my own way. It all worked out in the end, but there were problems along the way. At age 12, I am a multi-millionaire, and I live in a mansion in Minnesota. I run my own porn studio, and I have a private jet. Life is good.

I love you all!!!

xxoo

Trevor

***

I didn't want to ruin an incredibly sexy pair of bikini knickers, but Rhys said he had plenty more, and he wanted to know how much of Hiro's butt cheek I wanted showing. He scribbled across the front to show me it was ok, which tickled my cock!

xxx

Chapter 46
Design

Randy and I went out front to get Shlomo, my pet boy (who was really my new slave), whom I had left hitched to a rack in front of the main studio building. I grabbed his leash and disconnected his cuffs from the rack. I noticed there were new cum splatters on his belly, which made me smile. When he saw me smile, he also smiled.

"Let's get him cleaned up. We're going to lose daylight soon," said Randy.

I walked with Randy and yanked the leash behind me. We took Shlomo to his dressing room. I removed his leash but left his collar and cuffs in place. "Get in the shower," I said. "Get all of that cum out of your hair. I need you looking cute."

"Yes Master," he said as he turned to enter his shower.

Randy called for someone from hair and makeup to come down to get his hair dried and styled. I thought he might look even cuter with girl makeup like mine, but I wasn't sure if it would work well with his boy glasses. I would have to ask the stylist for suggestions.

***

Randy had set Shlomo on his makeup table so the stylist could work on him. "A little eyeliner and mascara always increase the boy cuteness factor, as I see you've discovered for yourself," she said with a wink at me, "but nothing colored for his eyes. Not with those glasses. And just a hint of red lipstick will go a long way toward maximum boy cuteness too," said the stylist. "There, how does that look?" she asked.

"That does look cute," I said.

She handed me two lipsticks, saying, "This one is for your boy, and this one will do the same for you. It's a different shade that will work better with your hair and eyes. Only use a little, and rub it in. You want it to look like it's your real lip color, and not makeup. Same with the eye makeup if you want to look cute and adorable. Use more, of course, when you want to look pretty. And here is some eye makeup for your boy. I see you already have good eye makeup that is perfect for you."

"Oh thanks!" I said, giving her a kiss. I hesitated for a moment, then said, "But his hair… it's too perfect or something."

"I know just the thing," she said. Five minutes later, a package from the gift shop arrived. It contained a flower garland to go around his head. The flowers were artificial, but the effect was stunning. "His hair can be perfect, and the garland will pull focus from the hair."

"That is so pretty!" I said. "Randy, do you see that? He's pretty now!"

"Thank you Consuela," Randy said, kissing the stylist.

"Yes," I said, "thank you!" I kissed her. Then I said, "Boy, thank her and give her a kiss."

"Yes Master," he said. "Thank you for making me pretty for my master, Madame." He looked absolutely adorable as he kissed her. I ordered him to kiss me as well. His little puckered lips were so very sweet.

***

I knew I looked extremely sexy in my purple silk outfit with gold and black paisley and fishnet stockings, and now I had the cutest, littlest boy in the whole complex on a leash, with his hands cuffed behind his back. A man with a portable camera met us at the lobby entrance, and he followed us as I dragged my boy around the lot, around the swimming area, around the helicopter on the pad, around all my favorite places.

"Kneel," I said to him when we returned to the lobby entrance. I pulled down my knickers and said, "Suck my cock, boy!" He obeyed immediately, and the camera got some great shots. I grabbed his head, with his leash still in my hand, and face-fucked him. I didn't know what the evening had in store, so I didn't want to cum. I did my best to pretend, but I'm not sure it worked very well.

"Pull my knickers back up boy." He obeyed. I learned later that he got paid £10,000 for his part in my promo video.

***

Back in my dressing room, Boris and Sebastian were in two chairs at the coffee table, Randy and I sat on the settee, and my pet boy was curled up on the floor at my feet. "Always remember," said Randy, "that your pet boy is a real boy, and he needs your love always."

"I think he likes it there," I said. Shlomo licked my boot when I spoke.

"Yes, he is happy there right now, but there will be times when you will need to cuddle him on your lap. He has given himself to you to do with as you please, but never forget that he has needs as well. Just make sure you read those pamphlets, and give him his copies." Randy had ordered several pamphlets for Shlomo and me to read. They described ways to make master/slave relationships work, and how to keep them from becoming abusive.

"Ok," I said. I handed the two pamphlets to Shlomo and told him to begin reading them. "Are we going to go to the costume shop and stuff?" I asked.

"Oh, of course," said Randy. "You might want to leave your boy here though. Give him a chance to read the pamphlets all the way through." Then turning to Boris and Sebastian he said, "Do you boys want to come too?"

Sebastian smiled and looked at Boris. Then he slithered out of his chair and began to unfasten Boris' belt. "Thinks need for practice fluff for Boris," he said. Boris lit up, and Randy and I had a good laugh.

"Can you please keep an eye on my boy?" I asked proudly.

"Is no problem," said Boris.

"Boy," I said, "you will obey Boris and Sebastian. You will provide any service they desire. You will not leave this room until I return."

"Yes Master," the tiny boy squeaked with his big, adorable smile, as if he would rather be nowhere else in the world. I understood that feeling, having experienced it many times myself these past few days. I didn't understand how he got it by being kept on a leash though.

***

"Hello!" said a large, bizarrely dressed, and excessively happy man with a huge, pink, bushy mustache and pink hair as we entered the costume shop fitting room. He was also wearing a dark pink outfit, with what looked like a plastic jacket, pink skin-tight trousers with small cupcakes printed all over them, and dark reddish-pink Wellingtons. (That's what people in the UK call rubber boots.) I thought he looked like a huge piece of bubble gum. I had met loads of strange-looking people in my new life, and I was growing accustomed to it. It seemed ok because they were all so nice and friendly.

"Hi Rhys," said Randy. "I'd like to introduce you to Trevor Hawk. Hawk, this is Rhys. He's one of our costume designers, and he minds the costume shop during evening hours."

"Nice to meet you, Rhys," I said, offering a handshake.

"None of that now!" said Rhys, rejecting my hand. "For me, it's a kiss or nothing," he said with a playful wink and a Welsh accent.

I stood on my toes and gave him a kiss. He wobbled his face from side to side as we kissed. He made me feel giggly, and that was nice on a day when I'd found so many things to worry about – money, talking to a detective from Scotland Yard, listening to important people saying horrible things about my promo video. But I couldn't worry about that now.

"So, to what do I owe the fabulous pleasure and great honor of meeting our extremely pretty and shockingly sexy new star, Trevor Hawk?" he asked.

"Trevor here is directing a live show for tomorrow with two of the new boys, Hiro and Kenji Watanabe" said Randy, "and he's been asked to do all the design work himself. He has some costume requirements to go over with you."

"Oh my!" said Rhys, his eyebrows flying to the top of his forehead. He sat down at a computer and began typing. "Congratulations Trevor! Already directing at… how old are you?"

"Eight," I said. "Nearly nine."

"Well, that's quite an achievement for a boy your age," said Rhys. "So tell me what you need."

"Well, er, the other boys are Japanese," I said, "and I want Hiro to wear yellow sparkly bikini knickers with a flame pattern in sparkly yellow sequins up the front. I want Kenji to wear the same thing in light blue."

"Oh! I have just the thing," said Rhys, standing up again. "You wait right here, and I'll be back in one minute, less if you're lucky," he said with a wink, "and I'll have a few samples for you to look at."

Rhys left the room through the door Nellie had used two days earlier to get me kitted out in my St. Felix uniform. Randy put his hand on my shoulder. I think he was showing that he was proud of me, or else he was trying to keep me from worrying about things. "Am I really the director?" I asked. "You just said I'm the director when you were talking to Rhys."

"Yes Hawk, you're the director," he said. "That's what it means when you're in charge of everything. I wouldn't worry about it though," he said. "Have as much fun as you can. Mr. Watanabe only wants to see you getting off with his boys. As long as you get off, he'll be happy. And I get the impression those boys will do anything for you."

The door opened again, and Rhys came through holding two sparkly pairs of knickers, one yellow and one light blue, and several clear plastic bags of sequins. He laid them on a table and asked, "So how do you like these? A bit flamboyant?" I picked up the yellow pair, feeling stunned at the amount of sparkle.

"They'll give off a nice glow under the lights. It has a bit of a surreal effect, but you boys always have that effect," he said with a snorting chuckle. "We have several other fabrics you can choose from. I just brought these because we have several sizes already made up."

"They're…" What should I say? They were so much more than I expected. I turned to Randy and said, "Am I allowed to buy some of these for myself?"

"Oh stop!" said Rhys. "You just say the word and I'll put something together for you."

"They're so… pretty!" I said. "I mean, really pretty! They're better than I thought. How much butt cheek can you see with these?" I asked. I was starting to think that everyone at Frenetic could do anything, so it was a little less difficult to ask questions. Everyone was also comfortable talking about sex and body parts too, and that made it easy for me to say what I wanted to say.

"Well let's see," said Rhys. "I grabbed these two because they are your size. You can try one on and see if you like the cut."

I took off my vest and sexy purple silk bikini knickers with gold and black paisley and pulled up the yellow bikini knickers. "Oh my heavens!" said Rhys. "You did fall down from heaven, didn't you, you sparkly little angel!" He pulled a 3-way mirror up to me so I could get a good look.

"I like to see more of that, that part of the ass…" I pointed to a part of my ass, the crease where the butt cheek meets the thigh. "These are so pretty! But can I see more ass cheek?"

"Oh you do know exactly what you want!" he said. "Are you looking for more of a thong, or a T-strap?" he asked.

"A bit more like a thong, yeah, but not a proper thong," I said, not knowing what a T-strap was. "Just something that's skinny on the bottom of the butt, and it can be wider up top."

He handed me a felt-tip marking pen and said, "Would you look in the mirror and draw a line on these to show me just where you'd like the cut?"

"On these?" I asked. "Are you mad? I can't ruin these!"

He took the marker from my hand and scribbled all over the front of the knickers, which tickled my cock. "I've got dozens of these in back. Go ahead and ruin them. We're making something better!"

I did my best to keep the marker near my butt crack until it was almost halfway up. Then I curved it around and went the wrong direction. It was a difficult thing to do while looking in the three-way mirror. I scribbled that line out and started again, and made a mess of it again.

"I think I see where you're going with this," said Rhys. "Would you mind if I try on the other side?" I handed him the pen, and in an instant he had drawn the exact, perfect curve.

"That's it!" I said.

"Ok, don't move," he said. He took a pair of scissors from a drawer and carefully cut along his line. Then he made a similar cut on the other side. There was something very sexy about a man with scissors cutting into my knickers. "How does that look? Can you see enough cheek, you cheeky little angel?"

"It's perfect!" I said.

"Of course the leg openings will be done up properly with elastic and narrow hems," he said, "but this gives you the rough idea."

Looking in the mirror, watching this man cutting my undies up with scissors, gave me a thrilling rush, and of course I got another stiffy. "Oh," he said as he pulled the yellow undies back off of me, "you do like these!" I looked at him and nodded. He made a honking sound as he gave my boner a quick tug, which made me shudder. "We need to look at some sequins now," he said.

He laid the yellow and blue undies next to each other and poured a few sequins from each bag on the table. "You said you wanted sparkly sequins that were the same color, so I brought these," he said. "I'd also like to show you a different idea, if I may." He laid a few of the sparkly blue sequins on the blue knickers, and next to them he put a few that were plain blue, with no shine at all.

"The shiny sequins don't really show up very well against the sparkly background of this fabric. But you can see the plain ones do show up, so a pattern can be more easily seen." It was true, so I nodded. Then he set a few very sparkly blue-green sequins on the blue knickers and said, "A similar color can also set off the pattern without changing the whole look." He sprinkled a few lime green sequins on the yellow knickers. "What do you think hun? You know how cute these two luscious little boys are. What do you think will make them look sexier?"

"I like your idea," I said. "I like those colors that are just a little different. And I want the sequins to look like fire coming from under their cocks. Can you make it look like that?" I asked.

"Can we?" he asked with mock incredulity. "Sweetie, if you can imagine the costume, we can make it. Believe me. Now you wanted some of these for yourself too?" he asked.

"Yes please, in pink. The little ones like the ones you're making for Hiro and Kenji."

"Done!" he said. "Darker pink for the sequins?" he asked.

"Oh yes please," I said, nodding. "That sounds lovely!"

"It sounds like we're done here," said Randy.

"Oh no," I said. "We have to get the rest of the things!"

"The rest?" He asked.

"Of course," I said. "I need a big, fancy crown, like the royal coronation crown, and a big, soft ermine robe as well. That's what I want to wear. I want to be the king, and a visitor from far away is presenting these boys to me as a gift."

"Oh how exciting!" said Rhys, sitting back down at the computer. "Do you need anything under the robe?"

"No thanks," I said. "Just the robe. I want them to see me open my robe and go mad with desire. Do you think it will work?"

"With your sexy little body?" he asked. "I'm going mad with desire just imagining it! I should tell you though, if you want a royal scepter as well, they have them in props. If you wear it, you get it here. If you carry it, you find it in props. If it sits on the floor, it's scenery. Ask Carl for the special scepter. He will know what you mean," he said with a sly wink. "I'll add a note for him in the computer."

"I will want some big boots too," I said. "Nice, big, comfortable boots with fur on the inside that will tickle my foot when I put them on!" I giggled a bit. "They have to look big and important when the boys kiss them."

"I think we can manage that," he said, typing away. "We have everything in every size.

"Ok," I said, steeling myself for the last request. "Can you make matching collars out of this same pretty fabric as the knickers? And leashes for the boys?"

"Ooh!" he said. "Someone fancies himself a bit of a dom!" I smiled and nodded, hoping he would just say yes. "Of course we can handle that," said Rhys.

"Two meter leashes please," I said.

"Two meters exactly," he said, typing the details into his computer.

I turned to Randy and said, "Now I'm done. That's all I need here."

"Ok," said Rhys. "We can guarantee the bikinis done by 7:00 AM, but really there's very little for us to do on the evening shift. We'll probably have them done later this evening. I'll rummage around and find you the right crown, robe, and boots. We have your measurements on file, all except what size crown you wear." He winked and wrapped a tape measure around my head. "Are you in residence here?" he asked. "The DICKS system has you in dorm room 46, but there is no move-in date."

"The DICKS system?" I asked.

"That's the name of the computer system here," said Randy. "It stands for Data, Information, and Computer Knowledge and Support, which is really the name of the department that manages the computers." He turned to Rhys and said, "Hawk is assigned to room 46, but we still have to decide whether he will be staying there tonight," said Randy.

"Ok," said Rhys. "If he's here tonight, we can do a fitting instead of waiting until tomorrow."

"Are Hiro and Kenji staying here tonight?" I asked Randy.

"Well, they are having their victory drive and their signing party tonight," he said. "I don't know if they will go back to the hotel with their father or stay here. But if I'm reading their father right, I think he's going to press them to get started in their careers. My guess is they will be here tonight."

"Then if I stay here," I said, "we can all do our fittings tonight instead of tomorrow."

"Now you're thinking like a director!" said Randy, giving me a sideways hug.

"Hiro and Kenji are in the system," said Rhys, "but we don't have their measurements yet. I see we have video of them from your shoot this afternoon. Oh my! They certainly are cute!" Rhys began fanning himself with his hand.

"We can use our best estimate from the video, but we will likely need to make some alterations for them. You won't exactly need fitting," he said, tickling my belly. "Your robe will be loose and huge, and everything else should be sized correctly. We shouldn't need to do any custom alterations for you."

***

We moved on to the props department. I had mixed feelings about staying in the dorm that night. I wanted to be with Boris and Sebastian. I loved them better than brothers, and I knew they would always be my best friends, but I was excited about meeting everybody in the dorm. Then it occurred to me there were only two roommates I didn't already know, the ladyboy and the other girl, and I thought I might have seen them both in the fluff area at some point. Besides them, it was Yvgenia, me, Shlomo, Adrian, Hiro, and Kenji.

"He said to ask for the special scepter," I told the man in the props department. His name was Carl, and he was big. Very big, like a man who had eaten nothing but fry-ups and barrels of beer his whole life. He was very kind, like everyone at Frenetic, but something seemed a bit odd about him. He was soft-spoken with a breathy voice, and he smiled a lot, which I thought was good, but his smile never changed at all. His eyebrows were always raised the same exact distance above his eyes.

"Oh, right then, I see the note from Rhys. He says you'll be wantin the… er, special scepters. He needn't have bothered with a note. You know just what you want, don't you, my precious boy? Right then. Anything else?"

I turned to Randy, who gave me a sly wink to tell me he understood my discomfort, and that Carl was really ok. "Oh yeah," I said to Carl in a soft voice, trying to sound like him. I had just thought of something at the last minute. "A scroll, like parchment they would use in Harry Potter. Something that just has pretend words on it will be fine. Something like that?"

"Ah right," said Carl, "I think we can scrounge something together for you, my fine boy. You wait right there. Won't be a tick." He nodded briefly to me, then stared into my eyes for a few seconds. Finally, he went into a back room in the props department and returned with three scepters and a parchment scroll.

"The special scepters, you see, they've got a dildo in the handle end," he said, gently stroking the dildos. "I've got these three sizes for you. Not sure what size you'll be needing, but you can take all three of them and see what works." The three scepters were identical except for the size of the soft black dildo protruding from the handle. "See, we've got boy cock right here, this one's a man cock, and that's our cricket bat size," he said with a soft chuckle.

"I think you can keep this big one," I said, handing the largest of the three back to him. Hiro and Kenji were little boys like me, and they were brand new. This was going to be their first scene. I wasn't going to give them a Baron Gargantua dildo. Hiro probably couldn't wrap his arms around that one. I wasn't even sure about the man-size dildo. "Thanks Carl," I said, giving him a hesitant kiss as we left for the scene shop.

***

"Randy," I said as we made our way toward the scene shop, "What's with Carl? He sounds all creepy. If I felt like this while doing a scene, you'd want me to call hold!"

Randy couldn't stifle a light chuckle, but he immediately collected himself and said, "It's sad, really. Carl is a wonderful man with a beautiful heart. He was hurt very badly when he was a boy. Very badly. He would give his life to keep you from being hurt like he was. He looks at you carefully to make sure he understands what you need from him, and to make sure you feel loved.

"Those were only two of the things that were missing from his life as a boy. He speaks softly to make sure no one thinks he is angry with them. He doesn't know how he comes across to other people, bless him," Randy said. He stopped walking, got down on one knee, facing me, and said very seriously, "Hawk, you need to know that every adult who works on this lot is safe, and that you can always trust them to help you if you have a problem. Some people just have… weird mannerisms. That doesn't make Carl a bad guy. It just makes him Carl, and I would trust him with my life."

"What happened to him? How was he hurt?"

"That's for another time, Hawk. Right now we've got more work to make your show a smashing success!" He smiled, picked me up, and spun around, making me giggle.

***

"A really big throne covered with red velvet and lots of padding," I said to the man in the scene shop, "and a red rug that rolls out in front of it." Randy had told me that live performances didn't require a lot of scenery, props, or costumes. The stage was small, and all the audience really wanted was to see people fucking, not fancy furniture. "The rug has to be thick and soft or padded or something, because that's where we're going to be fucking. Well, mostly." I was still developing my fantasy with Hiro and Kenji in my mind. Some fun on the throne would certainly be a good idea too, but I wasn't sure how the story would go.

We went through a huge warehouse and looked at several thrones, and they had one that was just perfect. Even my first time at directing was turning out really well.

***

"I had never met a ladyboy in person. I wasn't sure how they were different from transgender girls except they were Asian. I was looking all over her body, fascinated by every square inch. 'You look curious,' she said. 'You can touch if you like.'"

Chapter 47
Stepping Out

Sebastian's head was lying across Boris' knees when we returned, a few small rivulets of cum dripping from his cheeks. Boris' head was leaned back against the wall, as if asleep. Shlomo was kneeling at attention, facing them. He turned toward me with a great smile across his face. "Who's been a good boy then? Have you been a good boy?" I ruffled my pet boy's hair as his smile somehow widened further.

Randy and I took our places on the settee, and he said, "Hawk, Markus and I need to pay your mother a visit tonight. There's no more putting this off. You three boys will need to decide what to do with your night. Hawk, you can stay here in your new room if you like, and you three can get a car from the motor pool and go to Cockerel Manor for Hiro and Kenji's signing party. I think they'd love to see you there. Or you can all come back to my place right now, with me, and stay there while Markus and I visit Mrs. Hawkinson."

Of all the things I worried about in those days, the thought of Randy and Markus telling Mum that she no longer had custody of me and that I had moved out, didn't feel stressful at all. It seemed like a natural part of my new life. I didn't hate Mum. She had become far less important to me in my new life, that's all. Now that I'm twelve, I think that's a sad thought, but when I was eight, nearly nine, I was free.

"Oh! Car for party, I think," said Boris.

"Cute Japan boy must for cute Russia boy for welcome!" said Sebastian.

"Are pets allowed there, Randy?" I asked.

"I think it would be best if you dismissed your boy before you leave, Hawk," said Randy. "All of your things at my house have been boxed up. I had them packed and sent to your dorm room once I signed the paperwork. Everything should be there now." he said.

"You are welcome to stay with me tonight if you like. Just get a change of clothes from your room and bring them in the car to my house, either now or after the party."

This was it. I had postponed my decision whether to stay in the dorm or to spend one more night with Randy and the boys. I began breathing heavily. Boris and Sebastian meant so much to me! I didn't ever want to lose them as friends! But I really wanted to meet my new friends and sleep in the huge dorm room with them.

"I don't know," I said in a quiet voice. "I love Boris and Sebastian and you, and I want to stay at your house forever, but I can't. Now I want to sleep in my new bed with my new friends, but I don't want to lose our special love! You've been like a family, like a proper family. I don't want to lose that. I don't want to be a friend you only see at work or school or just in the daytime. I want us to be special, always!"

Randy kissed my head, and the boys got up to hug me. "Is always for special love," said Boris, just before he gave me a soft kiss. "Trevor Boy always love for brother. Spend many evening here for play, for visit, for fuck, for make film, for many reason. Always love is special."

Sebastian hugged and kissed me next. "Always for brother!" he said, looking me in the eye with a serious expression. "Unless some time want be for sister," he said with a giggle and a kiss for me. "Come for us three day only, make for much happy! Always special boy for Sebastian is Trevor Boy. Should stay for new room. Need for start new home. Special always. If bed here, if bed for house of Randy Man, if bed for Czechia, is no matter. Special boy always."

It was so easy to forget that Sebastian and Boris really lived in Czechia, and that they would be leaving in September. It was too sad to think about, so I didn't.

"Hawk," said Randy, "You have made a huge impression on a lot of people in three days, and none so much as the three of us. You have nothing to worry about, and you are always welcome to visit and spend the night. I think you should get settled in here in your dorm at the studio lot first though. You can come for the weekend if you like."

"So I stay here tonight and tomorrow night, and I can stay with you on Friday night then?"

"Sure," said Randy. "You can come anytime, but we will have lots of time together over the weekend."

"I love you all so much!" I kissed each of them as I began to cry again, but only a little cry. "Happy tears," I told them. Sebastian sniffled too.

***

Before leaving, Randy called the motor pool and arranged for a car to pick us up in front of the dormitory. First, we went to Boris' dressing room, and then Sebastian's, so they could change into their Cockerel Manor suits. Sebastian was wearing his glasses, which I thought made him look cute again, even with his new haircut. Then we went to dorm room 46, my pet boy in tow.

All of my things were in my walk-in closet, including all the gifts I'd received when I got my contract. My clothes were on wooden hangers, even my undies. Smaller things like socks were on shelves, unless they were part of an outfit, in which case they were attached to the hanger with that outfit. Larger things in boxes, like my nice camera and tripod, were stacked on the top shelf.

"Yuko!" called Boris as a very tall, pretty, naked ladyboy walked into the room. He kissed her and said, "Love for see you! Is Trevor Boy here, good friend, love much for him, much love, like small brother. He live for room 46 now."

Yuko came to me, leaned over, and kissed me. "Oh, you are a sweet little boy! So pretty too!"

"Thanks," I said. I had never met a ladyboy in person. They are Asian boys who dress and act like girls. They can really be girls or boys on the inside, like Jeanine or Annie, but they like to call themselves ladyboys. I was looking all over her body, fascinated by every square inch.

"You look curious," she said. "You can touch if you like."

"Thanks," I said, reaching out to stroke her hip. It was almost as soft as Annie's. "Should I call you a boy or a girl?" I asked.

"I'm a girl, and thank you for asking!" she said, bending down again to kiss me again. I kept my hand on her. It was as soft as a chinchilla that I got to pet at the zoo once on a school outing.

"Your skin is soft. You are really pretty," I said.

"Thank you," she said. "I can show you the skin products I use if you like."

"Er… yes please," I said. "I'd like that very much. I want to be soft like you." Boris was giggling as I explored her body, being careful not to touch her penis, which had no sign of pubic hair.

"You can touch it if you like," she said. "Boris has had it just about everywhere in his body," she giggled. Boris grinned and kissed her.

I put my hand around her penis. It was big like Boris' cock, and it slowly engorged and began to rise. "It's very nice," I said. "It's big and lovely. But how did you get… those?" I asked, pointing to her modest breasts.

"I'm a girl, and I'm growing up!" she giggled. "Really, I'm taking hormones so I will grow into a woman," she said. Then noticing my pet boy, she said, "Oh wow! Who collared our Shlomo?" Shlomo came to my side, knelt, and wrapped his arms around my leg. "No!" she said with an incredulous smile. "I've been trying since he moved in here! You lucky boy! He is so cute, and everybody's wanted him."

"He's the first pet boy I've ever had," I said. "I think it's fun having a pet boy, but I need to read the pamphlets about how to be a good master."

"Yes you do," said Yuko. "Read those tonight. There is very important information in them." I nodded.

I leaned forward to take a taste of her fully erect cock. "Is it ok?" I asked.

"Hunny, that's always ok!" she said. I pulled her cock into my mouth. It tasted very clean. There were no boy smells or anything. I didn't mean to give her a blowjob, but I found myself deep-throating her, only gagging once, just because it seemed like the thing to do with a big cock in my mouth. I was exploring, not really having sex. She gasped when her cock slid all the way in. "Trevor! Oh my god!"

Boris laughed and kissed her. "Trevor Boy have many surprise for you learn," he said.

I pulled my mouth back and smiled at her. "I learned how to do that last night. Really, it's easy."

"Easy for you!" she said. "I've never been able to do that, and you're just a little! Will you show me sometime?"

"Sure," I said. "But I might have IH… IHA… something like that. It makes my throat stretch more. Dr. Gupta wants to do more tests to see if it's true."

She gave me a confused look as Boris led her away to her bed to continue what I had started while Sebastian showed me how to use my cell phone. "Is for calling very easy," he said. "If want, soon also show for you internets." He showed me where all of the important phone numbers were. Sebastian guessed that Randy had programmed them in. He even programmed Mum's number, as if I was going to call her. I hoped he hadn't given her my number. "Must now put clothes for party for cute Japan boys," he said.

I removed all of my clothes and put them in a bin in my closet that was marked 'Laundry'. I put my gold chains in a jewelry box on my shelf that I didn't remember owning, though all of my stones and earrings and chains were in it. I took down a hanger with one of my Cockerel Manor suits and laid it on my bed. I selected my sparkly pink thong to wear under the shorts.

"That might be a surprise for someone tonight," I said, winking at Sebastian. I got dressed, being careful to pull the socks up straight, and put my shoes and cap on.

Yuko was shrieking, but when girls sounded like that, I could never tell if they were cumming or just enjoying themselves. Soon Boris stood up, wiping his mouth, and I had my answer. "Love for Yuko, very much," said Boris as he kissed her. "Must go for Cockerel Manor for party for new boys. You meet yet? They have beds for room 46 also."

"No!" said Yuko, sounding quite surprised. "Which beds? Who is moving out?"

"The man said the Harlow brothers were moving to America and weren't coming back," I said. "So my new friends Hiro and Kenji Watanabe are moving in instead."

"Are they Japanese?" she asked, lighting up.

"Yeah," I said, "and their dad is really nice and really rich. Randy says he is the distributor in Japan for Frenetic, but I think he has a whole bunch of businesses."

I told her about the live performance the next afternoon. "I hope I can get in to see that," she said. "Are they really cute? How old are they?"

"Hiro is eight, and Kenji is nine," I said, "And yeah, they are really, really cute, and really sexy. And they always smile! Always!"

"Oh, I can't wait to meet them!" said Yuko with a broad smile. "I never get to speak Japanese anymore. My English family only speaks English, and they don't understand Japan very well. I hope they like older ladyboys!"

"I think they like everything," I said.

"Trevor Boy director for live show," said Boris.

"Wow!" said Yuko. "You can't even be ten years old! How did you get that?"

"I'm eight, almost nine," I said. "Their father, Mr. Watanabe, brought them to my live show today for the distributors from other countries. He gave me a huge tip to give them an autograph on their bodies. I gave them a little more, and Mr. Watanabe liked that. I asked Randy, he's my agent, to talk to Mr. Watanabe to see if the boys could be in my promo film, so we did a really fun scene. Mr. Eastman liked the video, and he used it for their video audition. Then he gave them a contract. So, Mr. Watanabe wanted to say thank you to me by paying for a live show with his boys and me, and he wanted me to direct it. I guess it's all just a big thank you."

"Wow," said Yuko. "What an opportunity! You can do anything? You are doing the script and costumes and everything?"

"Uh huh," I nodded. Then I thought for a minute. "You… you're Japanese…"

"You don't miss a trick, do you!" she smiled.

"Um… are you busy in the afternoon tomorrow?"

"No," she said. "I have my morning scene with Boris, and I was planning on fluffing for one of the cast in the afternoon, but he can find someone else. Why?

My thoughts were racing. Yuko could be a servant to the king, a sort of nanny for the boys. "I think I can use other actors in the live show. Do you want to be in it?"

"Of course!" she said.

"I've got to make sure it's ok for me to have more actors," I told her, "but I have the perfect idea for you."

"Sure! Just let me know."

Boris was laughing. "Is good for see Yuko," he said. "Love Yuko, love Trevor Boy, now both work for live show." I didn't understand why he was laughing, but I thought we'd just made a pretty good deal.

***

We said goodbye to Yuko, and I dismissed Shlomo until I saw him again. We went downstairs where the car was waiting. There was no champagne, but plenty of root beer and ginger beer, all the beers that aren't beer, even shandy. This was a smaller car, with only one big seat facing forward and a cooler under a hinged tabletop, like in the limo we'd used for my victory drive, and an entertainment center with a fancy sound system, a TV, computer, Internet, video games, and the entire collection of all of Frenetic's movies from their entire history.

We watched a short video that was grainy and not the best quality from the 1980's because the boys wanted me to see Randy's first movie. He was a very cute boy of about ten, with long, wavy blonde hair. He was with a much older teenage boy. They were outside in a meadow with a blanket on the ground. Little Randy couldn't get the boy's cock inside his mouth except at first when he was soft. I noticed the older boy never touched Randy's little cock. Then the camera showed how Randy climbed onto the huge boner and slowly slid down, very slowly, until it was all the way in. He sat there still, then giggled a bit before pulling back up slowly, then grunting as he slid back down.

Before long, he had found a rhythm, and the older boy took over, pounding him doggy style, then in a weird missionary position. They kissed while Randy, lying on his back, wrapped his legs around the teenager's back, and the teenager fucked him hard and fast, and I thought rather carelessly. In the end, the teenager pulled out of Randy's ass, Randy sat up, and the older boy shot cum all over his face. The camera moved in for a close-up of Randy's cute, smiling, cum-slathered face. The whole thing was shot with one hand-held camera, and I think it was a cheap home video camera. It wasn't at all like the quality Frenetic produces today.

"Ask for Randy how was this movie," said Boris. "He say for you was not so good. Hurt for ass, not like boy, director not nice. He tell why Frenetic change for child porn. Child not important then. Now, important. Pay for him only fifty pound for film. Randy Boy love for big boy fuck, love show people fuck, love for child porn, so make film. If hurt a little, is ok. He like for make child porn, so he do. Now, not never do. If hurt, stop. No film if hurt. Pay for child same if hurt, if no hurt, but not use film if hurt."

"Things really have changed," I said. "I'm glad I'm a kid now, when things are so much nicer."

When the movie was done, I called Randy on my cell phone and asked him if I could have more actors in the live show. I told him what I wanted, and he said he'd see to it. He couldn't talk much because he was almost at Mum's flat, but he said everything I wanted was just fine. It was going to be a fun show, and Yuko was not the only one I wanted in my cast.

***

"The audience were encouraging us, and they complimented our beauty and artistic form, whatever that meant.

Holding still for even a minute is difficult enough for kids our age. Imagine doing it for 20 minutes with your cock twitching inside a cute boy's mouth, and your first ever fluff boy smiling at you!

Chapter 48
Party

When we arrived at Cockerel Manor, the party was in full swing. Mr. Eastman's serving-man, Benton, greeted us at the door. "Good evening, Master Trevor, Master Sebastian, and Master Boris," he said with a smile. "Come in, won't you. Masters Hiro and Kenji will be positively delighted that you came."

He showed us to the statuary room with the living statues and the piano. There were maybe fifty guests there, including several of the foreign distributors who had attended the live show. I was delighted to see that Hannah was also there.

"Trevor, my boy!" boomed a loud voice from the center of the room, "Boris! Sebastian! So good to see you! Don't you all look wonderful!"

It was the man who was responsible for the suits we were wearing, or at least their design. To me, they looked like little schoolboy uniforms, and I think the shorts were even shorter than my St. Felix uniform shorts. If I were anywhere else but a Frenetic function, I would have been embarrassed. Mr. Eastman gave me three of these suits, and he liked boys in clothes like this. I think the school uniform thing was a fetish of his. If it made him smile, I thought, then why should I be embarrassed? Boris was much older than I was, and he seemed to be fine with his Cockerel Manor suit.

We went to Mr. Eastman and gave him a kiss. Indicating the man standing next to him, he said, "I believe you know Mr. Watanabe already." Mr. Watanabe smiled, bowed his head briefly, and shook my hand. "Boris, Sebastian," Mr. Eastman said, "meet Mr. Watanabe, our distributor in Japan. Boris, you might have seen him this afternoon at your live performance, but I don't believe you were properly introduced." Mr. Watanabe greeted them with the same smile, head bow, and handshake. "His boys are the reason we are here," said Mr. Eastman. "Now where have they got to?"

Hiro and Kenji ran up to me with huge smiles, stood in front of me with their hands at their sides, not touching me, and both said, "Hi Trevor!" with a brief bow from the waist.

"Hiro, Kenji," said Mr. Eastman, "Meet Sebastian and Boris, two of our brightest stars at Frenetic." Hiro and Kenji said hello to them as well, with a similar smile and quick bow from the waist.

A serving-man came by with a tray of small white cups that were overflowing with a clear liquid. "Ah," said Mr. Eastman, taking a cup. "Boys, all, take a cup, and we shall drink a toast to these adorable young newcomers!"

After Mr. Watanabe and all of us boys had taken a cup, Mr. Eastman said, "I don't suppose you'll have tried sake before, Trevor?" I shook my head. "It is a bit stronger than champagne. Benton will make sure you stay within a reasonable limit tonight, so no worries." I nodded, feeling embarrassed again that I seemed to be the only kid being watched so I didn't drink too much. Mr. Eastman raised his cup and said, "To a tremendous and prosperous future for our new young boys, Hiro and Kenji Watanabe. May we all prosper as much as they surely will!"

"Hiro and Kenji!" we all called out before taking a sip. I slopped some of the sake onto my blazer as I raised it to my mouth. Then I coughed after I'd had a swallow, spilling even more. I could feel the alcohol in my lungs, even though I'd swallowed the drink into my stomach.

"Ho ho!" chuckled Mr. Eastman. "I did warn you!"

"Mr. Hawk," said Mr. Watanabe, bowing his head ever so briefly, "sake has many ancient traditions in Japan. We call it nihonshu, and there are many types. This is a special variety of genshu sake, my personal favorite, but it is strong. You might enjoy it more if you add a small amount of water to it. Drink it not only with your mouth, but also with your mind, and with your nose. Tell me if you do not taste a hint of banana, and the aroma of fresh flowers?"

I sniffed the sake and had another sip, very carefully. "I can smell a little of the banana I guess, sort of like there is a tiny bit of some fruit juice in it, but I only taste it after I swallow it. It's like it comes back into my nose the other way. Is that normal?"

"Yes, that is exactly how this sake strikes the palate. I see you are a budding connoisseur of fine sake! As you sip more, see if you can find the delicate flower aroma. I think you will enjoy discovering other flavors too," he said with a smile. "I had this delivered by air from Hyogo as a gift for our friends here at Frenetic. I did not know we would have such reason to celebrate!"

Mr. Eastman applauded, and others followed his lead. I hadn't noticed, but a crowd had begun to gather around us. "Now, if I may," he said, holding his glass high in the air with both hands and turning about to attract the attention of everybody in the room. "I would like very much to offer a toast of gratitude. To Frenetic Studios and to Mr. Philip Eastman for making this worthy investment in my fine boys, who have made their father very proud, and most of all to Mr. Trevor Hawk, who reached out so graciously to my two sons, who saw them worthy to cast in their first roles in child pornography. He so enthusiastically recruited them for performance in his own promotional video, itself a tremendous honor, and who thus brought their unique beauty and talents to the attention of the talent agents and executives here at Frenetic. I thank you all!"

"Here here!" shouted the crowd. I didn't know if I was supposed to have another sip of sake. Am I supposed to drink to a toast that someone has given me? Mr. Watanabe answered that question with a broad smile and a gesture with his hand, indicating that I should raise my glass and have a drink. Hiro and Kenji took small sips of their sake, and they continued to stand side-by-side, either smiling at me or giggling to each other. Neither of them had spilled a drop of their sake.

"Mr. Want-a-habby Sir," said Boris. "Ok we take boys for talk, we boys only, talk and make fun?"

The man chuckled kindly at the mutilation of his name. "Of course!" he said. "Go play, talk, admire the art, be boys! Do not listen too much to old men, who may be wise, yet are still old. The changing world is always fresh and new, and it belongs to young people like you. Go along now." His boys bowed to him and Mr. Eastman from the waist, and Mr. Watanabe returned the bow with his head.

***

I was surprised to see the boys were so neat and tidy, and fully dressed in their cockerel Manor suits. That was not at all how I looked when I arrived for my signing party. "Did you enjoy your victory drive?" I asked them.

"Oh yes," said Hiro. "We drove all over London. We had sake with Papa and our guests, and we laughed a lot!"

"Didn't you…" I wasn't sure how to ask my question. "I mean, when I had my victory drive, we drove all over London as well, but we were naked most of the way, and we had terrific sex. I thought that was how everybody did it."

Hiro and Kenji looked like their smiles were going to make their faces explode as they giggled to each other, but I noticed Boris and Sebastian were giggling too. Kenji stood by Hiro, like a proud big brother, and let him continue speaking.

"We were naked before we got into the car, but we are brothers, so of course we don't have sex with each other. And our father was there. But there were two others that Papa invited to entertain us during our drive. They were older boys from the studio named Jacob and Robbie. And of course the man from the studio had to play too!"

"I know Robbie!" I said. "He's really sweet and kind." I had a quick look around the room but didn't see Robbie anywhere.

"He is," said Kenji. "He took very good care of my brother. Jacob was with me most of the time. He pulled me onto his lap and…" He blushed, ran his hand through his hair, and the two brothers looked at each other and burst into a fit of giggles again.

"I think you're supposed to learn to say things out loud when you're talking about sex here," I said. "There were some things I felt embarrassed about, but my boyfriend Annie showed me it was ok to say things."

"You have a boyfriend who is named Annie?" asked Kenji. "But that's an English girl's name, isn't it?"

I nodded with a smile. It made me happy to think of my Annie. "You will meet him soon, I'm sure," I said. "You will understand."

Then I remembered we were talking about victory drives. "Our clothes were soaked with champagne when we got here," I said. "We had nothing to wear, but we didn't really want to wear anything either."

"You came here naked?" asked Hiro with wide eyes, "into the party room?"

"Well, yeah," I said. "Randy said they don't really expect us kids to wear anything here unless we want to."

"Papa said we must clean ourselves," Kenji said, again running his hand through his hair, "and that we must wear respectable clothes. Mr. Eastman gave us these Cockerel Manor suits so we could follow our father's wishes. Papa said there were important people here, and that his son must not be seen with…" Another giggle fit. "Er, I had something from Jacob in my hair. It was messy. Sticky."

"Oh!" I said. "He shot cum in your hair!" Those boys giggled far too much! "Yeah, if you let that dry, it can be hard to get it all out."

"Must be first hard for cum out!" said Sebastian. This time the three of us were giggling while the two brothers looked confused.

"Say it out loud," I said to Kenji. "He shot his cum all over my hair."

He blushed a deep shade of red, then repeated, "He shot his cum all over my hair!" Another giggle fit. "And his cum came from his big, hard cock!" he added, which made his little brother bend over with laughter.

"Papa said you are writing the script for our performance tomorrow," said Kenji with an air of giddiness, after Hiro had calmed himself.

"We are very excited!" added Hiro. The two brothers nodded to each other. "Papa says we should work with you as much as we can," said Hiro. "He says you are the best new boy porn actor ever, and that very soon you will be a superstar. He says we should watch you and take notes. That way, as we watch you succeed, we might learn from you and succeed too."

Take notes? Everyone was saying I was special, and ok, I'd begun to believe some of it, but these two boys were going to base their careers on watching me and taking notes? I think that was too much for me. I wasn't anxious though. I think I felt more annoyed this time. I felt a wave of recklessness sweep over me. I decided to see if these two brothers were really serious.

"Then watch me and take notes," I said. "Follow me and learn!"

I quickly stripped off my clothes, right there in the middle of the room, except for my sparkly pink sexy thong, and hopped over to the piano and began to dance. I could see a serving-man immediately picking my clothes up and brushing them off before taking them out of the room.

I danced for the pianist, wiggling my ass to the room. She played something a bit more lively, and I danced among the people nearby, who seemed careful not to touch me except to return the kisses I offered to each of them. I danced my way back to Kenji and Hiro, and told them softly what I wanted them to do next. Of course, they looked at each other and giggled again. While I held my arms high above my head, wiggling my hips, each of them took hold of one of the skinny side straps of my thong and pulled it down, making my boner bounce, as if waving hello to the crowd. Then I kissed the two brothers with my arms around their necks and asked them, "Are you going to follow me now?"

My recklessness continued. I bent over, picked up my thong, and threw it carefully at Mr. Watanabe, hitting him in the face. He laughed conservatively, but his smile seemed genuine. He handed my thong to a serving-man, who left the room with it. I danced back toward the piano. Kenji and Hiro looked at their father in horror for a few seconds. Mr. Watanabe gave them the slightest nod, wearing the slightest smile. The brothers squealed as they turned to look at each other. Then they nodded slightly, looked again at their smiling papa, then back at each other. They nodded again, and within a few seconds they had also stripped off their clothes and joined me, to the tumultuous applause of the crowd, including Mr. Watanabe.

I had the impression that many of the adults considered it a challenge to get the kids naked at Cockerel Manor parties. Maybe I was too easy. I certainly wasn't much of a challenge. I felt a very intense sense of freedom when I stripped in front of a crowd because it defied everything I had ever believed about being naked. It wasn't a bad thing at all. In fact, it was a very good thing that made a whole crowd very happy.

Boris and Sebastian were soon dancing naked with us, and soon after, so was Hannah. I wondered where Robbie had gotten to. He had to have been there somewhere. I wanted to dance with him. He looked really good naked.

Gradually some of the adults joined us near the piano, and then a few more. They kept their clothes on while they danced. It seemed only us kids and living statues were allowed to be naked at Cockerel Manor parties.

The pianist played a slow tune, and we paired off into couples. I asked Hannah to dance, and Sebastian and Hiro paired up, as did Boris and Kenji. There was another fit of giggling when Hiro accidentally got a boner while he was dancing with Sebastian, but Sebastian kissed him, and all was well.

Sebastian had a gentle way of calming people down. He could certainly calm me down. I think Sebastian had probably explained how much people liked to see boys' boners, and he gave Hiro's cock a few tugs, which were more like wanking him than the playful tugging everybody normally did. Hiro squealed with giggling appreciation.

I wanted to learn about girls. I thought dancing with Hannah would be a good opportunity. She liked me a lot, so I thought maybe she could tell me things without laughing at me. Why had this particular girl decided to give me her virginity that afternoon, knowing I was gay? Why did boys say girls had cooties? Did they have cooties? What did it feel like having nothing down there? "Hello?" she said. I think she noticed I was looking at her body all over but not looking at her face.

"Oh, sorry," I said. "I mean, you're a girl…"

"Yes," she said with a hint of a grin. "I am a girl."

"Of course, I mean…" What did I mean? I just wanted to know. "What's it like being a girl? I mean, what's it… what's it like?"

She kissed me softly and said, "There's not much more that I can tell you besides what you feel in my kiss. You see the obvious differences, I mean your cock and my pussy, but who we are is as much a mystery as who you boys are."

I kissed her again and asked, "What do you feel in my kiss?" If that was really all she could tell me, then what was she telling me? It didn't make sense, so I wanted to hear how she answered the question.

"I feel a very lovely, curious boy," she said, "but a boy with amazing power, emotional power and sexual power. I knew the moment I met you that I wanted it to be you, Trevor Hawk. I wanted you to have my virginity. I wanted to feel your power, and it was almost more than I could bear."

"But I'm gay," I said. "I mean, you're lovely, and it surprised me how fantastic our sex was, but I'm gay. How can you feel that sexual power if I like boys?"

"Maybe you should think about what made our sex so fantastic for you, even though you are gay? When a girl gives her virginity, I think that makes sex powerful too. I think that made it powerful for you, because you felt how powerful it was for me. I think that's how it works, with good sex anyway. We each feel what the other person is feeling. And you are a boy with great sexual power," she repeated.

"You use it as you wish. This afternoon, it was your wish to use it with me, in your promotional video. Then, even though you are gay, you still said yes, you would have my virginity. And I felt your power as I settled down on you, and your cock tore deep into my vagina. I've never felt anything like it. You are gay, and you won't ever be my lover. I knew that, but you are a part of me forever now. I will always have your mark on my body. You've changed part of my body that cannot be changed back again. When I'm with my girlfriends and we tell stories about how we lost our virginity, I will always have the best story because I lost my virginity to Trevor Hawk, but I will also have the best story because it will be filled with very powerful feelings of joy and pleasure and wonderful memories of today." She looked frustrated. "I'm talking too much. I hope that was an answer. I'm afraid I've forgotten your question."

I kissed her. I'd also forgotten the question. "If I weren't gay…"

"Don't say that!" she interrupted. "You are gay, and there's an end to it. I don't want to hear how things might be different, because they're not different. Let me love you as a friend, and let me remember my time with you as a very, very special day, not as the beginning of something that can never be, all right?"

"All right," I said. She was a very intense girl. Her daddy loved her, but I wondered if he understood her. I sure didn't. I liked her, but she seemed to have a bit of craziness in her head. I thought that it might be pretty cool to have sex a few more times with her before she went home to Australia, just to see if it was still as powerful. "We should have more sex. Are you going to be in London long?" I asked.

"We leave in the morning," she said, avoiding my eyes. "We're stopping in Budapest first, so Daddy can have a meeting with another studio there, then Beijing, and finally home. Very boring. There's no one else to talk to on Daddy's Jet, and everything is so boring in Beijing. But there are a lot of sexy girls and boys in Hungary that I get to meet."

"Oh! Do you like girls?" I asked.

"Of course I do," she said. "I like girls the way you like girls."

Of course that couldn't be true, because part of my fascination with girls was not knowing anything about their bodies. Sure, I had friends who were girls at Preston Primary, but they would never be my friends again if I asked them about their bodies or if they liked sex. No one my age seemed to know sex existed at Preston Primary.

"You mean they're friends?" I asked.

"Well yeah," she said. "I have lots of girlfriends, and I think it's fun to play sex with them, especially with my friend Tiff. The things that girl can do with her tongue are amazing! But it's physical really. Physical is brilliant, but I couldn't fall in love with a girl. I haven't met one anyway. With you I…" She stopped abruptly and shook her head. She looked sad, so I kissed her. "Don't," she said, and she walked quickly out of the room, leaving me alone on the dance floor.

"What did I do?" I asked Boris, who was dancing with Kenji nearby.

"Dance with girl," he said. "Is enough that." Girls could be so complicated! Once again, I was glad I was gay.

Hannah's dad was not far away, and I could see he had watched the whole thing, though he was too far away to hear anything. I went to speak to him. "Don't you worry your pretty head, son," he said with a smile. "Hannah is a bit peculiar around boys. I don't think she likes feeling out of control, and when she falls for a boy, she's not in control. She can be a stubborn girl, but she has a very kind heart." I didn't understand that at all. I certainly didn't feel like I was in control, not for a single minute. "I'd better go see to her. She'll have a quick cry, and she'll be on her feet again."

He left the room, and I never saw him or Hannah again.

***

Hiro, Kenji, and I went to look at the living statues, especially the large plinth with the group on it. Boris and Sebastian stayed by the piano, dancing arm in arm or hopping to American ragtime, Boris' favorite music.

"Mr. Eastman says you can touch them, but only gently," I said to Hiro as he admired the various body parts. "Sometimes it's fun to try to figure out which part belongs to which person, or whether it's a man or a woman's part."

I reached up and gently stroked a lovely, smooth, round ass near the top and said, "This is a man's ass. During my signing party on Monday I thought it was a woman's ass." The brothers giggled again. "You should feel it," I said to them. They both reached up tentatively and touched the ass with a single finger. "No," I said. "That's just touching it. You need to feel it properly. Rub it gently, like this."

They giggled at each other, and Hiro said, "It's so soft! Is this a boy?"

"No," I said. "He's a grown-up man. See? Follow his body, under that leg and that head. It's tricky, because the woman's head looks like it goes with his body, but can you see his head there? With the cock in his mouth?"

"I see him," said Kenji. "Look Brother, there," he said. Hiro finally saw the connection.

"I like this kind of art!" said Hiro.

I got an idea. I rushed off to ask Benton, the man in charge of the household staff, if he could arrange it.

***

Five minutes later, Hiro and I were standing in a room full of naked adults and older teens, waiting quietly in a queue. We heard a bell, and a similar group of naked people entered our room and walked quietly past us. Then our queue moved out quietly into the room. Hiro and I stepped onto the small, cold marble plinth nearest the piano. I stood upright with my legs spread while Hiro dropped to his knees and put my cock in his mouth and his hands up the back of my thighs and on my ass. I grabbed two handfuls of his hair and made a growling face. A small crowd gathered around our plinth and applauded. A few took pictures. We had to pretend they weren't there. My cock was hard while we were walking out to our position, and it was my job to keep it hard without moving.

It was more difficult than I thought. I wanted to move my cock in and out of his mouth, just a little. Without thinking, I did a few times, and it made me twitch. Hiro stifled a giggle each time. Some of the adults touched our bodies gently, in a caressing way. It felt nice, and it made me harder, but it also made it more difficult to stay still.

Hiro and I were both eight, though I was nearly nine, and for boys our age, holding still can be very difficult, even for a minute. It was really hard to remember to keep a growl on my face. Hiro had his eyes closed the whole time and a cock in his mouth, so he just had to hold still. But the audience was encouraging us, and they complimented our beauty and artistic form, whatever that meant.

Mr. Watanabe brought a group of business associates to look us over. "Yes, he is my son Hiro, and I am very proud of him. And this other boy is Trevor Hawk. He is the reason my sons were discovered by the talent agents at Frenetic, and I will always be grateful to him, as will my boys."

Kenji moved to the front of the group and bowed to me from the waist. My eyes were flitting around as I tried to sneak a peek at the people around us. That wasn't allowed, but I was curious. Many of Mr. Watanabe's associates took pictures of us, some with Mr. Watanabe standing next to us, others with groups of people standing around us.

And there he was – Robbie! He was standing next to another boy who looked familiar, but I didn't know him. He had sort of messy purple hair, and I thought I might have seen him by the pool, or in the fluff area. Both boys were dressed in their Cockerel Manor suits. Robbie gave me a smile, and I winked back, which wasn't allowed, but I was excited to see him.

"I know you can't talk," he said, "but you should see how stunning you look!" He took his phone out of his inside blazer pocket and took a photo of us. "I will show you this later so you can see. It's lovely to see you again!" I had forgotten to growl.

Every now and then I felt my body wobble, as if I'd forgotten for a second which way was down. Hiro held my ass tighter when he felt that happen. On his knees, he had better balance than I did. I began using his head to steady myself.

As time went on, I wanted so badly to fuck Hiro's little mouth that I think I could have orgasmed without moving at all. It was then I understood how the men in the living statues kept their cocks hard.

Finally, I heard the bell ring. Hiro looked up at me, my cock still in his mouth, and smiled with his eyes. He sucked in and out a couple times, which surprised me and made me give out a small yelp. I wasn't cumming, but I was close. We were told to keep a neutral look on our faces as we stepped down from the plinth and joined the queue of naked adults back to the room. That proved to be just as difficult as holding still for twenty minutes.

"That was naughty!" I said to Hiro, once we were back in the room with the other naked statue people. He covered his mouth and giggled, his eyes showing that familiar, intense smile that made me think his head might soon split open. He and Kenji seemed so well behaved. I'd never expected any mischief from him, but it made him all the more adorable to me. I wondered if Kenji would ever do such a thing. He was the big brother, I reasoned, so probably not. I had the impression that it was important to Kenji to set a good example for his little brother. Without meaning to, I let out a giggle as I imagined my stupid brother Ian trying to set a good example for me.

Benton approached the two of us with a tray, on which were two more cups of sake. "With the compliments of Mr. Watanabe, who enjoyed your glorious display, and who wishes me to tell you further that you, Master Hiro, have made your father proud, and that you, Master Trevor, have honored his son, and therefore him as well."

"Oh, thanks!" I said, taking the sake. "It's ok, isn't it, Mr. Benton?" I asked.

"It is a gift from Mr. Watanabe," he replied. "It would be discourteous if you did not enjoy it now. Might I suggest the two of you join him?"

We both nodded and sipped the first bit from our cups. They were overflowing again, but this time I was careful and didn't spill any. Of course, this time I was also naked, and it wouldn't have mattered if I'd dribbled some of it down my front, like I'd done on my blazer earlier. It was good to practice though. I was sure this wasn't the last overflowing cup of sake I would be handed that evening. "If you would both follow me, please," said Benton. "It would not be proper for Master Hiro to be seen entering the statuary room from this side chamber. He and Master Kenji are the guests of honor. And of course you, Master Trevor, like them, are always an honored guest at the Manor. It is therefore proper that you should always use the main entrance to every room, and to the Manor itself."

He led us through a large double-door in the back of the room, then along a corridor and around a corner to the main entrance to the statuary room. Benton leaned over and spoke softly into my ear before we entered. "Master Trevor, might I suggest you use this drink to offer a simple toast of thanks to Mr. Watanabe."

That made me nervous. It took very little to make me nervous in those days, when my new life was still very new, but I'd never made a toast before without using bread and a toaster. I didn't know what to say. Mr. Watanabe was very kind, but also very wealthy and powerful.

Benton seemed to read my mind. He was a very perceptive man. He spoke softly again, saying, "Master Trevor, it need not be a complicated or eloquent speech. To Mr. Watanabe, the words of a child are a vessel of love, as I have heard him say, and he will hear anything you say with kindness. Might I suggest something simple, such as, 'Thank you, Mr. Watanabe, for your many acts of kindness and generosity to me and to those around me.' If that sounds daunting, then I might suggest you say something similar in your own words, but do say it from the heart."

I nodded and thanked Benton before the three of us entered the room. I didn't like it when he watched my drinking, but he was a very helpful person to learn from. He always seemed to know what to do.

I was surprised when we were greeted by a round of applause. Hiro immediately placed his sake back on Benton's tray and bowed several times toward many of the people in the crowd, and to his father last. He also held his bow to his father longer. I put my sake on Benton's tray as well and tried to copy Hiro's movements. Mr. Watanabe and some of his Japanese associates applauded me as I did, and they returned my bows. So did Robbie, who was standing next to Mr. Watanabe, along with Boris, Sebastian, and the purple-haired boy. It seemed the Japanese party guests were not expecting bows from an English boy.

We took our sake back from Benton's tray and joined Mr. Watanabe, Robbie, his friend, and the Russian boys. I gave Robbie the sweetest kiss I could, and I hugged him. "It's so nice to see you here, Robbie!" I said, spilling a small amount of sake on the back of his blazer.

"You too," he said, a wide smile stretching his face. Then, turning to his friend, he said, "This is my mate Jacob. We rode with Kenji and Hiro for their victory drive." Jacob greeted me with a kiss.

"I need to give a toast to Mr. Watanabe, and I'm nervous," I whispered in Robbie's ear.

"Blimey mate," he said. "Better you than me!" That didn't help my confidence. A passing serving-man carrying a tray of sake stopped near Robbie. He took two, saying, "I guess we'll be needing something to drink then." He gave the second cup to his friend.

Kenji rushed up to his brother, and they stood face-to-face, smiling and giggling, but not touching. "You did very well, Brother!" he said. "You were very still, and you looked cute with Trevor. You even held your penis stiff the whole time without touching it! We were happy that you lasted the whole time. Papa was very proud!" I hadn't realized Hiro kept a boner while we were on display, though it shouldn't have surprised me. I couldn't remember anyone telling us that was part of our pose though.

I returned to my nervousness. I didn't know how I was supposed to start a toast. Mr. Watanabe was in front of me, smiling at me, and it seemed he wanted to talk to me. I whispered to Kenji, "I want to give a toast to your dad, but I don't know how… I mean, everybody's talking, and I'm nervous. I want him to hear me, but I don't want to be rude and interrupt everyone." He nodded with a bright smile. Then he turned to his dad and said something softly in Japanese. His father raised his hands and hushed the crowd. They all looked at me. I suddenly froze in terror.

Kenji seemed to notice my panic. He took my hand, the one that wasn't holding the sake cup, and he said very quietly to me, "It's ok, Trevor. He will be delighted with anything you say. He is a good man, and the others will do as he does. He does not want you to be afraid. He loves you already." I looked Kenji in the eye and nodded, trusting yet another person I hardly knew.

I held the sake cup with both hands, the way you're supposed to hold it, and I lifted it toward Mr. Watanabe, as he had done when he'd offered his toast earlier that evening. I took a deep breath, and spoke. "Mr… Mr. Watanabe, you've been, well, really nice to me and my friends. Oh, and very generous too. I mean, you've also been very generous. I mean it. From my heart, I mean. I just wanted to say thanks with a toast…" How did grown-ups do this? What did they say? "…Um, thank you, and a toast to your good health, Mr. Watanabe."

I could hardly sip my sake from embarrassment, but as I did, I heard calls of "Mr. Watanabe!" and "Here here!" from the group.

This time, after sipping his sake, Mr. Watanabe bowed from his waist and said, "Thank you for your very kind words, Trevor. I bow to you now because such words from a child are more powerful and humbling than the same words from a mighty emperor. I know my boys will have a very good friend and mentor here at Frenetic. You have made me, as a father…"

His words were so much better than mine! And he was so nice! And he thought I was this brilliant kid who was going to make his sons' careers take off! And why didn't these people ever touch each other? I felt reckless again. Reckless, and a bit frustrated as well. Maybe it was the sake, but I didn't care. Right in the middle of his sentence, I put my sake cup on Benton's tray again and wrapped my arms around Mr. Watanabe's waist in a big hug. A hush fell over the people around him. I was sure I had done wrong by interrupting what he was saying, and probably being naked and hugging him was a horrible sign of disrespect to him, but I didn't understand all the words and the bowing and the not touching. Hugging him was something I could do that everyone should understand.

I felt a hand on my bare back, then another on the back of my neck. "Forgive an old man," he said softly. "It is easy to forget the pure language of children, which is not always spoken in words. You are not formal. You are pure, and your heart is not yet capable of dishonesty. I understand the love in your young heart, and I thank you with all the love in my old heart."

He held me in that embrace until I was ready to let go. He was smiling when I looked up, and so were the people around him. "People at Frenetic kiss all the time," I said. "Everybody kisses each other to show we love each other. Can I kiss you?"

He looked to his left and his right, and there was quiet gasping and soft, uncomfortable giggling among the crowd. He said, "I would… love that, and I would be proud to have so many good people see our kiss, Trevor." Then he bent down, and we kissed. "Now drink your sake, young Trevor, and you as well, Hiro! We are celebrating this evening!" We drank down our sake and returned to the area near the piano to dance again.

***

"I would be scolded if I did that in Japan," Hiro said during a break from our dancing. We had paused to have another cup of sake sent to us by Mr. Watanabe.

"Can't you even hug your own father?" I asked him.

"Of course we can," he said, "but it would not be proper to take hold of him in front of his business associates. We hug all the time at home, and when we're not around his business people. When we are in public, we act properly in public. When we are with Papa's business associates, we act properly as the proud sons of a powerful businessman. When we are at home, we act properly for our home, and that means hugging and sitting on Papa's lap and sometimes even teasing him!" He looked at his brother, and they both, once again, covered their mouths and giggled.

"But when Papa is not in Japan," said Kenji, "he tries to accept the customs of the country he is visiting. He expects us to act properly as Japanese boys when we are with him, but he welcomes gestures from others, like your hug and your kiss, because they are the custom here. But after he returns to Japan and we remain in England, he expects us to act like well-behaved English boys."

"So, as long as he is here," I asked, with a bit of mischief in mind, "it's ok for me to act like an English boy, but you have to act like proper Japanese boys?"

"Yes," they both said.

I put a hand behind each of their necks and pulled them each in, one at a time, for a kiss, very sweet kisses at first, then moving back and forth, I kissed them more passionately, adding some tongue. "Ha ha!" I said, taunting them. "I can kiss you and you can't kiss me!" They looked at each other again and fell into another giggle fit.

***

"Hiro bowed deeply in thanks to Mr. Eastman. I just stared at my medal. It was beautiful! It was set in a decorative box for display, and in a small compartment behind the medal was a gold chain with a mount so we could wear them around our necks if we liked. Everyone cheered and applauded."

Chapter 49
Homecoming

It was time for us to leave. Before letting us go, Mt. Eastman called us kids to gather around him and Mr. Watanabe, next to the piano. After one of his important-sounding speeches, he presented Hiro and me each with a gold medal, on which was an image of Michelangelo's David, only he was clearly done up as a young boy.

"When children participate in my living statuary," he said, "they are awarded these medals for successfully completing their twenty minutes, which is no small achievement for boys as young as yourselves," he said, shaking our hands.

Hiro bowed deeply in thanks to Mr. Eastman. I just stared at my medal. It was beautiful! It was set in a decorative box for display, and in a small compartment behind the medal was a gold chain with a mount so we could wear them around our necks if we liked. Everyone cheered and applauded. Kenji and Mr. Watanabe were beaming with pride.

I stepped forward and whispered to Mr. Eastman, "But I didn't stay still the whole time. I forgot to growl, and I looked around when I shouldn't have."

"Nonsense, boy!" he said. "So you weren't perfect. None of my statues are perfect. It's impossible! If you watch very carefully, you will see they all move slightly at one time or another, and you are only eight. Your feat was more impressive than theirs. That's why you get a medal, and they only get money. You've earned this medal, and I'll hear no more against it." He smiled kindly, and I kissed him.

Hiro had been looking over his medal too. He bowed again at the waist to Mr. Eastman. "What, no kiss for your executive producer?" Hiro looked at me and giggled as if I were his brother. Then he kissed Mr. Eastman, and both smiled broadly.

"Pardon me Sir," I said, "but what does 'executive producer' mean?" Normally I would have been nervous to ask such a blunt question of such a powerful person, but the sake had made me a little careless with such things.

"Oh ho!" he said. "You should know that already, my boy. It means that I am in charge of all aspects of every production in the Children's Division."

"You mean, like a director, Sir?" What he said sounded like what Randy had told me about directing tomorrow's live performance.

"Not quite, young Trevor," he said. "All Frenetic productions have a director, whose job it is to make all artistic and editorial decisions for that production. They choose the cast, costumes, set, props, lighting, sound, technical and design personnel, everything.

"My job is to ensure that the product of our directors is of the highest quality. The directors create the art, and I oversee the art they've created. No film can be released by the Children's Division, or any other division within Frenetic if there are children anywhere in the film, without my approval. I also determine which screenplays will be made into films. All films in the Children's Division must get my approval before production begins. I rarely have to use it, but I do have authority to intervene in any production.

"I can tell a director that the music should be done over, or that a certain scene needs to be reshot with different lighting, things like that. But you see, we hire only the finest directors here at Frenetic, and that makes my job as executive producer quite easy." He leaned in to me and said with a quiet smile, "But we'll keep that just between us, ok?"

"Ok," I said.

"What keeps me far busier than my work as executive producer is my work as managing director of the Children's Division itself. We have a large business to run, you see, and that requires a lot of organization, and often tedious paperwork."

"So you're a businessman, like Mr. Watanabe?" I asked.

"Yes," he replied. "You could say that. He buys films from us, and then he sells them to other businesses for a profit, or he airs them on his cable networks. That is his business, or rather a small portion of his many businesses. I simply direct a division here at Frenetic, and I am executive producer for all child pornography that comes from Frenetic Studios. That is my business. Far less complicated, and I daresay a lot more fun," he added with a wink, "but Watanabe strikes me as a man who thrives on keeping very busy. Odd how he can be so calm all the time with the amount of work he does. I think I would find the stress a bit much at my age."

***

We all got our clothes back, cleaned, neatly folded, and bagged, before we left. I was feeling a little dizzy from all the sake, and so were the other boys. Benton did not dare restrict my drinking as much as he did on my party night, because Mr. Watanabe kept sending us all more and more sake. Benton seemed frustrated, but I think he wanted me to have the experience, and he didn't want to upset such an important guest as Mr. Watanabe. Drinking too much at celebrations seemed to be a tradition for Mr. Watanabe. I was grateful I wasn't filming a scene the next morning. Being dehydrated wasn't fun when it happened before, even though I got to meet Nurse Dan.

Mr. Watanabe let us boys use his personal limousine to get back to the Frenetic lot because we couldn't all fit in the car we had taken to the party. Our plan was to go to Randy's house first to drop Boris and Sebastian off, and then return to Frenetic to bring Hiro, Kenji, Robbie, Jacob, and me–home. It dawned on me that I really had a new home, and it was a lovely home.

Kenji told me that Jacob was the boy who had played with him during their victory drive. "Oh!" I said. "You're the one who shot your cum in Kenji's hair then?" Robbie and Jacob shared a laugh, but Kenji blushed. I'd embarrassed him, so I kissed him and said I was sorry.

I also learned from Robbie that he had just moved from his home in London into an empty two-bed room in the dormitory building on the third floor. "It was empty," he said as we left, "and it's boys only. My little brother will be moving in with me over the weekend. I wanted to look after him until he finds his own way at the studio. He got signed a few weeks ago, and we meant to move in together, but he's had mononucleosis, and he hasn't been able to begin working here yet. He might just fluff for a while and join the fall class of newcomers before doing any films. He hasn't decided. He's nervous, and he wants to do it right. He thinks maybe fluff work will give him good practice before he starts filming."

"Monocluni…" I couldn't pronounce it, and I'd never heard of it.

"Mononucleosis," he repeated. "Most people just call it 'mono.' Poor kid had such a terrible sore throat. He stayed in bed for weeks. He was too contagious to make porn for a long time too. You don't know how strange that is for such a hyper kid as my brother to be so knackered all the time. It was a bit depressing really. He's about your age, you know. You'll like him."

"Cool!" I said. If he was anything like his older brother, I was sure we'd be good friends. "What's his name?"

Robbie chuckled and said, "His name is also Robbie."

"What?"

"Yeah, I know it sounds strange," he said, "but his real name is Robin, Robin Christopher Mason, after Christopher Robin. Our parents liked Winnie the Pooh, but Little Robbie gets embarrassed about being named after Pooh's friend, so please don't tease him about his name, ok?"

"I promise," I said, thinking how horrible it would be to be mean to anyone at Frenetic.

"My real name is Robert Cornelius Mason," he continued, "after our grandad. I've actually got a number three after my name because I'm the third with that name, Robert C. Mason the Third, but I rarely use it. Grandad's mates call him Corny, Dad's mates always call him Robert, and I'm just Robbie. There's no need for numbers really." He gave me a look that told me he was a bit embarrassed about his name too, though I couldn't imagine why. I'd never known anyone named Cornelius though, and I'd never known anyone with a number at the end of his name.

"Little Robbie and I have our own separate friends, and they started calling each of us Robbie, all on their own, and it sort of stuck. We're very close as brothers, so we thought it was ok to share the same nickname. We call him Little Robbie so people know who we're talking about. Thing is, he looks dead-on like I did at his age, and the studio have some weird ideas for us about some strange time-travel thing, or maybe flashback scenes where he plays me when I was younger. I don't understand it yet, but they're thinking of doing the time travel thing in this St. Felix series if it takes off. And it will, mate, because you're in it!" He gave me a kiss, and I blushed.

***

Seven drunk, naked boys in the back of a limousine. You know we had a fun drive, and we took the long way to Randy's house. It took us less than a minute to get Robbie and Jacob naked once we were done talking. The rest of us had remained undressed since the party. We spent at least an hour driving aimlessly through London. I deep-throated Robbie and Jacob, just to show them I could do it. "Blimey, Trevor!" was all Robbie could say. Jacob said nothing at all, but he came very quickly, and I added the taste of another boy's cum to my palate.

At one point, Boris opened the sunroof and lifted Kenji in a sort of upside-down hug, but really it was a standing 69 position. Boris' upper body and Kenji's lower body protruded through the sunroof as Boris sucked Kenji's cock. (The nights had been warm in London that mid-July week.) Inside the car, we could see that Kenji had difficulties wiggling and giggling, and he was not really paying enough attention to Boris' cock. So, Boris punished him by setting him on the roof of the car with his legs hanging down through the sunroof and blowing him with all the power and skill a boy with Boris' experience had. Kenji was left screaming and kicking through the streets of London as pedestrians on the pavements looked on, some cheering, some with their mouths hanging open. Boris did not stop when Kenji came either. Kenji made quite a scene for the onlookers.

I wanted to send Boris and Sebastian off with something special. Boris stood up again while I deep-throated him. I tried to teach Hiro and Kenji how to do it, and they tried, but they kept gagging, and when they weren't gagging, they just couldn't do it. So, I bent over the back seat and asked Boris to fuck me. He made me beg him first, and I had to beg properly!

"Boris, mightiest of Russians, with your cock so massive, I beg you with ass held high, please do me the honor of pounding my ass until I scream!"

With the Japanese boys giggling hysterically, Boris obliged, saying, "Not stopping for scream, Trevor Boy."

I asked Sebastian to sit in front of me while Boris fucked me so I could suck him off. I think he knew how important this felt to me, so he did. I'm sure he wanted to be the bottom, but he could bottom for Boris and Randy anytime. I sucked him as well as I could, trying not to pay as much attention to Boris' cock in my ass as I did to Sebastian's pleasure.

He still had a small boy cock, so it was always all the way inside my mouth, and I worked my tongue around it, tickling his foreskin and cock head. He ran his fingers through my hair, and he began to moan. He leaned forward, and he and Boris kissed over my back, which made it very difficult for me to continue sucking Sebastian, so they turned me over on my back. Then it became more of a face-fuck for Sebastian. I liked this position because I could use my legs to keep my ass lined up with Boris' cock, but still I tried to pay attention to Sebastian. They were kissing over my body, and that filled me with love and happiness. I think they felt a lot of love because they both came soon after taking the position. I was only sorry I couldn't see Sebastian's sweet face from where my head was. His honest orgasm face had filled me with so much love earlier that day.

Hiro had been mostly an audience member while all of this was going on. I liked that. I wanted Hiro to have a special experience. Kenji and Hiro were not afraid to touch each other when their father wasn't around, but never sexually. (I imagined touching Ian if he were naked, even non-sexually, and it made me want to puke!) While The Russian boys and I were playing, the Japanese boys were just watching, sometimes touching us and caressing us. Robbie and Jacob mostly looked on and smiled.

***

When we arrived at Randy's house, he invited the seven of us in. He told me how things had gone with Mum. He said she was drunk, and she didn't care where I lived. I pressed him for details, because I sensed he was holding something back.

"I don't want to upset you, Hawk, but it got ugly," Randy told me in a somber tone. "She said some very ugly things. It was the gin talking, Hawk. You have become successful, and her life is dreadful. Normally, parents are happy when their kids do better than they did, but sometimes, parents in a bad situation can become jealous of their kids, and that's what this looks like. The gin makes a mess of those feelings, and drunk people always say stupid things. She put your things in a few boxes, which I had sent to your dorm room. Ian was delighted to have the room to himself."

He thought that would upset me? "Good!" I said with a smile, not a fake one either, but perhaps a bit of a drunken one. "I can't wait till she really sees the back of me!" I turned around on the settee and wiggled my bare ass at the group. "You didn't tell her we were making child porn, did you?" I asked.

"Of course not, Hawk," he said. "That's for you to decide, where, when, and how, though I suggest you do it before the promotional material for St. Felix Academy starts to circulate next week. We advertise in places where your mother is not likely to see the adverts, but she might be flipping through the television channels late one night and see you. It would be better if she found out in a way that you want her to find out."

"I just want to see her face when she finds out," I said. "Maybe I should ask Raoul to come along though. She might throw a few things!" I giggled.

"We can arrange that," said Randy, to my surprise. "Your safety comes first."

Then I remembered the live show. "Oh Randy!" I said. "Can King Khan be in the live show tomorrow, just for a few minutes?" Hiro and Kenji looked at each other curiously. "Only I need someone to deliver the boys to the king. He wouldn't need a costume. He would be naked the whole time. He would bring them out

with their leashes, get a quick blow job from Yuko, and leave."

"I will see if he is available," he said. "This is very short notice for him. He is busy with his talent agent work, sorting out the next class who will be starting in the fall. He's also directing a film, though I don't know his shooting schedule."

"Ok," I said. "But if he's not available, could you ask Pao Pao? Or maybe even Roddney?"

"Sure Hawk," he said. King Khan, Pao Pao, and Roddney had played three Polynesian men in the first film shoot I'd ever seen at Frenetic. I was fluffing for Sebastian, who was also in the scene. All three of the men had really big porn star cocks, and all looked like they could be from a far off land, like Hiro and Kenji.

I went to Randy and kissed him. I rubbed his cock through his trousers and undid his zip, fishing around inside for his treasure. He gently took my forearm, almost caressing it with both hands, and pulled it away.

"Hawk, you've had quite a bit to drink tonight. Benton kept me informed. I'm glad that you celebrated in the way that Mr. Watanabe wanted. I think it's good for you to learn Japanese culture and traditions, but an adult must never have sex with a child when either of them has had a lot to drink. It's another important rule that you will understand in time. You cannot give permission for an adult to have sex with you unless you are sober. It doesn't count as permission if you've been drinking."

I looked at him and suddenly felt sad. He had never said no before. "I'm not drunk," I said, louder than I meant to. I was not like Mum! She fell over sometimes, and sometimes she made no sense when she spoke. I realized it was strangely difficult to form my words when I spoke, but I was sure I was still making sense. I was a little dizzy, but I hadn't fallen over!

"I know, Hawk, but the rule still applies. I believe you have had a lot to drink, and that's ok for tonight, but it means I can't have sex with you, or with any of you boys. Mr. Watanabe was very generous with the sake tonight. You can play with each other, but not with an adult."

Without expecting it, I began to cry. I wanted to give him a nice deep throat blowjob, and he wouldn't let me! "Don't you like my deep throat?" I asked him.

"Hawk, I love your deep throat!" he said. "I've never felt anything like it! And I've never known a nearly-nine-year-old boy who could do that for me! But I cannot put my sexual pleasure over my professional ethics and your personal well-being. You need to know that this would be the same as touching you sexually without asking, because now if I asked, and you said yes, there is no way to know for sure if you are only saying yes because you've been drinking. You might not understand. I expect you don't understand, but it has to be that way." He hugged me until I stopped sobbing. "I love you Hawk. I love you in ways you can't imagine. And when you are sober, I would love it if you give me that deep-throat blowjob any time, if you still want to, as long as I'm not in a meeting or something, ok?" I nodded.

"Ok," he said, "I think it's time for a special treat." He went to the kitchen and put a scoop of vanilla ice cream in each of eight glasses. Then he filled the glasses with root beer. We sat around the table, and he gave us each a glass with a drinking straw and a spoon. They were covered in a thick foam, much thicker than I'd ever seen in a root beer.

"This is called a root beer float, and I think they're fantastic!"

Hiro and Kenji looked at each other, apparently not knowing what to do, whether to drink through the straw first or to begin eating the ice cream with the spoon. They looked around and saw each of us doing something different. Then they looked at each other, shrugged, and of course giggled, before digging in. Hiro took his spoon to the ice cream, and Kenji sipped through his straw first. Randy swirled his ice cream in his root beer with his straw first. I picked up my glass and slurped some of the foam off. It was delicious!

***

Soon it was time for us to leave. I kissed Boris and Sebastian goodbye, and I cried a little more. I was still afraid of losing my new best friends, who were a lot like real brothers, but they were wonderful, like older brothers are supposed to be, I think. They said they would stay overnight with me sometimes in my big bed, and I would be spending my weekends at Randy's house, so I felt better.

We drove straight to the Frenetic complex, for the first time using the residents' entrance near the dormitory. The driver carried our bags with our clean and folded clothes into the lobby along with another bag containing Robbie and Jacob's clothes, which were neither folded nor clean.

"Good evening, Mr. Hawk, Mr. Mason, Mr. Hampton, Mr. Watanabe, and Mr. Watanabe," said the woman at the front desk, as if counting us off and marking attendance.

The driver set our bags on the desk because he was not allowed beyond that point in the children's dorm. Before he left, I jumped up on him with my arms around his neck and kissed him, saying "Thank you for driving us!" His reaction surprised me. He held his arms out sideways, and he looked frightened, not happy. Hiro and Kenji had another giggle fit as the driver left.

The woman at the desk also seemed to be stifling a giggle. She explained that the driver did not work for Frenetic, and he didn't know of our kissing customs. Of course he didn't! I had forgotten we had arrived in Mr. Watanabe's car, not the one we had taken from the Frenetic motor pool. I felt sorry that, by showing love to him, I had made Mr. Watanabe's driver uncomfortable.

"Oh yes," said the woman at the desk, "I have a message for you, Mr. Hawk. Rhys from the costume shop called to say you three can go any time tonight to get fitted for your performance tomorrow afternoon." Hiro and Kenji are the happiest boys I've ever known. The news that they had a fitting positively filled them with delight!

"Oh, do you two want to go now for the fitting?" I asked them.

They looked at each other and nodded. "But shouldn't we wear something to walk there?" Kenji asked.

"You can wear something if you like, but I'm going as I am," I said. "You'll just have to take it off once we get there." They giggled at each other again. Robbie and Jacob left for their rooms, with kisses all around, and we left for the costume shop.

"I will have your bags sent to your rooms," said the woman at the desk.

***

The bikinis looked so much better than I'd imagined, thanks to a little bit of Rhys' sense for shaping sexy knickers. And again I couldn't believe that boy in the mirror was me! I was Hawk Boy, King of Sexiness!

Chapter 50
Fitting

We walked in the dark from the dormitory building to the main studio building and into the costume shop. Rhys greeted us with his smiling exuberance. "Oh! I'm so glad you three lovely cuties could make it here tonight!" he said.

"Rhys, this is Hiro, and this is his brother Kenji," I said. "Kenji, Hiro, this is Rhys."

"So nice to meet you adorable boys in person," said Rhys. "I got a call from Cockerel Manor with Hiro and Kenji's sizes after they were fitted for their suits, so these should fit just fine, maybe just a nip or a tuck. Trevor, you are going to love this, and you boys are going to look very, very sexy!" He knelt down and helped each of us into our sparkly, shiny, sexy bikini knickers.

"Oh!" he said with true Shakespearian drama, "Oh my! Don't you boys look fabulous? I hope you don't mind, but I made a few more changes to the cut that I thought you'd like. I lifted the side-straps and scooped the front and back to give them more of a curvy look. Now they have higher sides with a sort of plunging belly line. Do you like it?"

I nodded, speechless as the three of us stood gazing into the three-way mirror. These were so much sexier than I'd imagined. I asked the boys to turn around so I could see how much ass cheek was showing, and I could feel my cock hardening. The cut in the back was exactly where I had drawn my line. Rhys put his fingers under my leg openings and worked his way around and said, "Yes, that's a wonderful fit." My own ass had never looked so good! He ran his fingers under Hiro's bikini and said, "That's a bit snug, sweetie. Are you comfortable? Would you like it to be a little roomier?"

"No Sir," he said. "These are very sexy! I think if they are tight, that makes them more sexy."

"My name is Rhys," he said with a smile, "not Sir, ok sweetie?" Hiro nodded. He had a look at Kenji's bikini and said, "Oh my! This one looks just perfect, don't you think?"

Kenji turned in front of the mirrors and nodded. "It looks nice Rhys," he said.

Rhys smiled and said, "I have something for you boys," he said. He showed a second pair of identical knickers to Kenji and Hiro, saying, "Those are for you to keep. The studio keeps all costumes used in shows, so I made each of you an extra pair that you can keep as your own. You keep the ones you're wearing, and I'll have these waiting for you in the dressing room."

Hiro and Kenji bowed at the waist as they accepted the gift. "Thank you, Mr. Rhys," they said.

"Oh stop it!" he said with his permanent and genuine smile. "Call me Rhys."

"I thought you two were supposed to act like English boys while you were here," I said. Naturally, they looked at each other and giggled.

"Yes, you are right, Trevor," said Kenji. "Thanks Rhys," he said, this time without bowing. "These really are sexy and beautiful."

"Yes, thanks Rhys," said Hiro, clearly trying not to bow. If it's possible to bow with the eyes only, Hiro did.

"I have a crown and a few robes for you to try too," he said to me.

He took a robe from a hanger and wrapped it around me. It was beautiful! It was also surprisingly heavy. Then he put the crown on my head. It was also a little heavier than I expected, but very well padded, and not uncomfortable. I stepped in front of the three-way mirror for a good look. The robe was longer than I was tall, so quite a bit of it dragged on the floor.

"Oh that looks simply gorgeous!" said Rhys. "I have another robe I'd like you to try." He removed the first replaced it with a much lighter, simpler, and slightly shorter one. "There are a few reasons why this one might work better for you," he said. "You won't be stepping on it when you walk, so it's safer, and safety comes first. You could easily trip and fall in the other one."

"Oh that's ok," I said. "I won't be wearing the robe when I walk. I will be climbing out of it when I first stand up from the throne." This robe was dark red with gold lace trim. It had strange red flaps sitting on the shoulder and a tall red collar with gold trim.

"Ok," he said, "but I'd like you to think about one more thing. That first robe looks very regal and very important. You look like a real king wearing that one." I nodded. "But I think what you might really want is to look like a sexy king. I think this one does that better than the first one with all the fur.

"When the front of that one is open, it's still difficult to see anything unless it's open wide. With the gold lace trim on this one, just a little peek is all the audience needs to see. You can keep this one on as you stand and then pause a few beats before slipping out of it. Let them drink in your sexy gorgeousness before revealing everything."

"I see what you mean," I said. He was right about the bikinis, and he was a professional, so I decided to trust his judgement about how sexy the robe looked on me. "I'll use this one."

"Well that's that problem solved!" he said with excitement. "That leaves just a few more things. Can you boys come here, for a sec?" he asked Hiro and Kenji. Rhys sat in a chair, and I noticed two collars on the table next to him. "This is very important, boys," he said. "These go around your necks, so they need to be perfectly comfortable and not tight at all, so you tell me if anything feels too tight." They nodded obediently. He positioned Hiro in front of him with the boy's back facing toward him. He wrapped the collar around Hiro's neck and said, "There, how does that feel, sweetie?"

Rhys poked two fingers between the collar and Hiro's neck as he answered, "Fine. It feels just fine."

"Ok, that feels loose enough, but it doesn't look loose," said Rhys.

"Ok Kenji, your turn." Kenji stepped in front of Rhys with his back toward him. Rhys went through the same procedure and determined his collar was also good. "Oh those bikinis do look marvelous from this angle!" said Rhys, looking over Kenji's cute butt. "That revealing curve over their little bums was just perfect, Trevor sweetie! Have you ever considered going into costume design?" He made me giggle almost as much as Hiro and Kenji!

"Ok," said Rhys, "you two boys stand side by side, good." Rhys walked me around behind Hiro and Kenji. The view was breathtaking. "Now Trevor, I need to show you how these leashes work. They are covered with the same shiny lame material as the bikinis, and that material stretches. The boys' collars do not stretch, so this is a safety feature.

"The leashes have a rope in their core for most of their length, but the last six inches have only padding. That means the last six inches can stretch." He connected the clasp at the end of each leash to the two collars. "This hardware also has a special feature," he said. "Boys, you will feel me pulling on your leashes, but I want you to stand still, ok?" They both nodded.

"Now watch carefully when I give this a good tug," said Rhys. "I'm going to count down now. Three, two, one…" He pulled sharply on the leashes. But instead of pulling the boys' necks back, the clasps seemed to have broken and let go.

"You see? That is a safety release," he said. "If the leash is pulled too hard, the clasp will separate and release from the collar. Now how did that feel, boys?"

"It was ok," said Kenji, smiling and nodding.

"You know," said Rhys, "that in scenes like this, it is always the boy in the leash who directs the movement, not the person holding the leash."

"Oh, like dragging someone by the hair?" I asked.

"Yes, it's the same principle," he said. "Now I'm going to need these back," he said as he removed the collars from Hiro and Kenji.

"That leaves just one more item," he said. "Your boots, Trevor. You wanted big boots with fur lining. I have your shoe size. I have long boots, but I added the fur lining myself. I had to guess a bit how much that would change the boot size. We might need to work a little to get a proper fit."

"Ok," I said, feeling excited at how this was all coming together.

Rhys showed me two pairs of boots, both black, and both with fur lining. One was long, and the other was shorter, but quite ornate. I tried on the shorter boots first and stepped up to the mirror. I took down my sexy sparkly pink bikini knickers so I could see myself naked in them. Then I asked for the robe and the crown so I could see them all together. They had looked pretty good to me when I tried them on separately, and Rhys liked them too, but I wanted to see them with the long boots. I like long socks, and I thought long boots might look nicer too. I sat on Rhys' lap while he pulled them over my feet and up each leg. Then he did up a row of brown fasteners on each boot. He asked me to walk around a bit so he could see how they looked.

"Oh heavens!" he said. "Your legs are lovely!"

I walked up to the mirror, and I couldn't help getting another boner. It felt natural now to get a boner in front of people, and I wasn't embarrassed anymore. These boots made my legs look amazing! The tops were just below my knees. I wanted to jump into the mirror and make love to that boy's sexy body!

"Ooh! I think we have our decision, don't we Trevor?" asked Rhys. I nodded slowly, enjoying the sight in the mirror. It was still difficult to see myself as a truly sexy boy, but there I was, as sexy as any boy on the film lot.

Rhys put the crown back on my head and wrapped the robe around me so I could see the effect. I held it closed tight, then open, and then open just a little. When it was open just a little, I could see a tiny part of my knees and inner thighs, the inner part of the boots, my cock, and the middle of my belly on up, all framed by the sparkly gold lace. That was the perfect look!

"You won't be taking these boots off during the performance, will you?" he asked. "It would be very time-consuming and awkward. If you go with these boots, you should plan to leave them on for the whole performance."

"Oh I'm not taking these off," I said. "I mean, just look! Would you want me to take them off?" I asked. He chuckled and agreed they made me look much sexier.

"That robe has such wonderful movement too," he said. "It seems a shame for you to climb out of it so soon." I decided to give it some thought.

Rhys tapped something into his laptop computer, which was sitting on the table next to him. "Now the cast list shows that you will have two more actors in the live performance," he said. "But there's a note here from Randy that says Khan is not available for the show. I am supposed to ask you if Pao Pao would be ok." I nodded, and he typed. "And just to be sure, Pao Pao and Yuko have no costumes at all?" he asked. "They will be naked for the whole show?"

"Yes, that's right," I said.

"Yuko?" asked Hiro. "That is a Japanese girl's name. Will there be a Japanese girl in this show?" he asked.

"Well, sort of," I said. "You will meet her later, and you can decide how much of a girl you think she is. She will be our roommate, so you will meet her tonight. She's really lovely." Both brothers looked slightly confused and a little concerned.

"We wanted to be in a room with you, Trevor," said Kenji, "but we have spent very little time with girls. In Japan we went to a boys' school, and our friends were boys." He looked at Hiro, who appeared worried. "You are the director, of course. We will follow your script as you require."

I chuckled quietly and said, "It will be just fine. You'll see."

"Ok then," said Rhys. "You can wear those cute bikinis back to your dormitories, and I will have these two waiting for you in the dressing room tomorrow, along with the robe, the crown, and the boots. I will need to keep the collars and leashes too. They will be waiting for you tomorrow. You will have a dresser in your dressing room to help you with the collars and the boots."

"They will be in a dresser drawer?" I asked.

"Oh, you are precious!" Rhys laughed. "No hun. A dresser is a person who helps you get dressed. You'll need a hand getting into those boots before the show tomorrow. Your dresser will see to that."

I was fascinated by all the new things I'd been learning, but I felt oddly embarrassed to have made such a mistake in front of Hiro and Kenji.

***

Hiro and Kenji felt a little awkward around naked girls, especially the one they were scheduled to perform with the next day. They were willing to do whatever it took to make it at Frenetic, and to please me. Of course, they had nothing to worry about. To me they were both quite pleasing already.

Chapter 51
New Family

We all kissed Rhys and thanked him for his excellent job of making us look sexy before walking back to the dormitory building. The night air in July was warm, and it was perfectly comfortable to be walking around naked, or nearly so. Only a few days earlier I would have wanked to such a fantasy – walking around naked in public – but this was my new life, and the incredible had become the everyday in many ways. I saw Roy, the camera operator, entering the pub as we walked past. I waved to him and blew him a kiss. As he smiled and waved back, I thought briefly about the end of summer, and how the weather would soon make it impossible to walk around naked outside. It wasn't a happy thought, but I was enjoying the evening, and I decided not to get upset about it.

It was about 10:30, and house rules at the dormitory said our lights should be off at 11:00. The three of us were excited to meet our roommates, but that didn't give us much time to get to know them before we had to go to bed. When we entered room 46, Shlomo was lying in his bed under his blankets, dutifully reading his slave pamphlets, and Yvgenia was lying naked on top of her blankets, reading a book. Yuko was standing at the foot of her bed, locked in a deep kiss with a naked black girl of about thirteen, who looked just like the girl in the painting above the last bed in that row, next to Yuko's bed.

"Master!" called Shlomo as he sprang out of bed to kneel in front of me. He hugged my legs and kissed the sequin flame on the bulge of my sexy pink bikini knickers from Rhys. I noticed his leash was on my shelf where I had left it when I dismissed him before going to Hiro and Kenji's party. He was wearing his collar and cuffs too. As he hugged me, he developed another of his enormous stiffies.

"Heel, boy," I said. He knelt at my side, and wrapped his arms around my leg in a happy hug. I could feel his hard, bouncy cock rubbing against my leg. He wasn't humping my leg like a horny dog or anything, but I think we both liked it there.

All of this happened very fast, and Hiro and Kenji looked confused. They looked from Shlomo to Yvgenia, back to the two kissing girls, and then at each other. I thought I could sense some discomfort from them, but I decided to go on saying hi to everyone and introducing them.

"Yuko!" I called to her when she finished kissing the girl. "This is Kenji Watanabe, and this is his brother Hiro Watanabe, the brothers I told you about. Boys, this is Yuko. Yuko…"

"Yuko Sato," she said as she approached the brothers, offering them a quick bow of her head, which they returned. Their dad wasn't there, but I guessed it was ok for them to act like Japanese boys when they were around other Japanese people.

Yuko was wearing a skimpy pair of knickers, and to my astonishment, I could see no sign of her cock bulging through. "Don't you two look sexy! Look at those cute bikinis!" she said with excitement to the Watanabe brothers. "I can't wait till our performance tomorrow. It will be so much fun! They said your father was paying for it. Is that really true?"

"Yes it is," said Kenji, bowing briefly from the waist this time. Yuko returned his bow with a brief nod of her head. Kenji lacked the same sense of enthusiasm that Yuko showed. "Our father is very proud that his sons have been accepted to work with Frenetic, and he wanted this live performance to be a celebration. Many members of our family and many of Papa's business associates will be there too."

"You don't seem very happy," said Yuko. "Is something wrong? Don't you want to do the show?"

Hiro seemed to be looking at the floor, or possibly he was holding his head in a bow. I couldn't tell. "My brother and I, we have not been around girls," said Kenji. "We have no experience with girls our age, and certainly not older girls such as yourself. We went to a boys' school in Japan. Our friends were all boys. We have always played with boys, and several teenage boys and men too. With our lack of experience, we hope we can perform satisfactorily to please a girl such as yourself." He bowed from the waist again.

Yuko giggled cutely, then apologized with a quick bow from the waist, remembering the seriousness of the situation. "You have nothing to worry about, sexy boy!" she said. "Just think of me as one of the boys." She pulled down her knickers, revealing her cock, which had been tucked away between her legs.

Kenji gasped with surprise. Hiro looked up to see what was happening. Then he also gasped. Yuko had a good laugh. "Then you are a boy!" said Kenji.

"Oh no, I am a girl." Hiro and Kenji seemed utterly baffled by this statement. "I am as much a girl as our friend Igi here," she said, indicating the black girl, who smiled and waved. "You boys have never met a transgender person, have you?"

"I am sorry," said Kenji. "Please excuse our ignorance," he said, looking at his brother, "but we have not heard that word before." Both boys bowed at the waist in apology. "We do not know what that word means, and we have never met a boy who says he is a girl. We do not mean to be rude…"

"Oh no," said Hiro, shaking his head and finishing with a bow, "never rude."

"We hope we can learn from you," finished Kenji with yet another bow. I was beginning to wonder how long conversations normally took in Japan if they had to keep stopping to bow. I also wondered how normal this was. I would try to ask Yuko or the boys about bowing some time.

"I will tell you all about being transgender," said Yuko, briefly returning the bow, "but first we need proper introductions. This is Igi," she said, indicating the girl she had been kissing. "She also lives in this room. Igi, this is Hiro and Kenji, and I don't think you have met Trevor here either."

"No, I have not," said Igi with a heavy foreign accent. "It is a great pleasure to meet you three boys," she said, offering each of us a kiss. There were those soft, full, thick, lovely black African lips again! I might be gay, but I would always kiss any girl with lips like that.

"I'm sorry if it's rude, but may I ask where you are from?" I inquired.

She laughed and said, "I come from my home in Sheffield!" She looked at Yuko, who tried not to giggle too much. "But that is not the meaning of your question, is it?" I shook my head, feeling a little regret that I had asked. "Don't worry, dear. You are curious, and that is not rude. I was born and raised in Nigeria. My family moved to the United Kingdom three or four years ago."

I was curious about the rest of her story, and I would ask her another time, but I wanted to introduce the two happiest brothers in the world to the girl who really needed more happiness in her life. "It's very nice to meet you, Igi," I said. "I hope you can tell me more about Nigeria soon."

"It would be my pleasure," she said. "I miss my village, and talking about it makes me feel like I am there again."

I led the boys to Yvgenia's bed while Yuko and Igi returned to their kissing. Yvgenia had sat up when she heard us talking. Shlomo crawled on all fours at my side. I hadn't told him to do that, but I think he wanted to. When we arrived, he resumed his position hugging my leg.

"Hi Yvgenia!" I said to her with a smile.

"Hi Trevor," she replied in her customary monotone.

"This is Kenji Watanabe and his brother Hiro," I told her. "We learned today that the Harlow brothers are moving to America, so now the Watanabe brothers will be staying here instead. Kenji and Hiro, this is Yvgenia, and she is not from Greece. She is my friend."

I gave Hiro a look as he began to bow, and he straightened up right away, saying, "Very nice to meet you, Vev… Yevevg…"

"Her name is Yvgenia, Brother," said Kenji. "It is very nice to meet you, Yvgenia. That is a Russian name, isn't it? Are you Russian?"

"I guess so," she nodded, perking up just the tiniest bit, it seemed.

I kissed her and said, "I love you, Yvgenia." I waved Hiro and Kenji to join me and kiss her as well. "We kiss a lot at Frenetic to show our love for everyone," I said to them. I saw the title of the book she was reading. It was called Juvenile Diabetes for Juveniles: How All Those Shots Will Save Your Life. No wonder she seemed depressed again. I felt sad for her.

"Yvgenia, I've told you I didn't know a lot about girls' bodies and sex and stuff," I said, "but Hiro and Kenji have even less experience. It would be lovely if you could help us learn. I mean, you like boys, right?"

"I'm not a lesbian, if that's what you mean," she said, still in her monotone voice.

"Well, sort of," I said. "I mean, you can't work now until your diabetes gets sorted, so maybe you can help us learn, and it could be just like working? You could even charge us for lessons!"

She gave off a faint hint of a smile. "I'll think about it, ok? Right now I don't want any sex at all. I just don't feel like it. Maybe I will tomorrow. Maybe not." She didn't say anything about my offer to pay her for sex like a prostitute, though looking back on it, I feel a little guilty for having said that. Still, it wasn't ordinary prostitution I had asked for. It was more like tuition that I was offering. I wonder if all these thoughts went through her mind. I over-think things sometimes, and maybe this is an example.

"Maybe one day you could just lie back while we look over your body to learn about girls? It would be like a doctor examining you. You could listen to music, or read a book even, but I hope it would be a happier book than the one you're reading now," I suggested. "That's not really having sex, and it would help us a lot when we have scenes with girls to know where all the nice, good-feeling parts are and all."

"I suppose, if you want to."

"If she doesn't want to do that for you, remember me, you cutie boys!" said Igi.

I wanted so badly to cheer Yvgenia up, or at least to take her mind off her diabetes for just a little while. Hiro and I told her about our experience as living statues. "You did that?" she asked, sounding surprised. "You were one of those people, I mean two of those people who has to be still for twenty minutes in the statuary room?"

"Yes," said Hiro with a wide smile. "If you're a kid and you make it through the whole twenty minutes, you get a gold medal! You should try it some time. It's not easy, but it feels wonderful when you are finished!"

"They might let you do that at Cockerel Manor," I added, "even if they don't let you work here at the studio."

"It sounds boring to hold still for twenty minutes," she said.

"Yeah," I said, "that part can be boring, but people can touch you, and it made me more and more horny the longer we were there. When everyone is watching me and touching me, it really turns me on, and my cock was just sitting there in Hiro's mouth, and I couldn't move it! Sometimes I accidentally moved it a tiny bit, and I thought I would explode!"

"That used to turn me on too," she said, "being watched and touched, all that. Maybe when I'm feeling better I'll talk to Mr. Eastman and see if he wants me to try it."

"If you want to pose with a boy," I said, "you can always pose with me!"

"Or me," said Hiro.

"Or me," said Kenji.

"Or all of us!" I said.

That made her smile, and my heart leapt! I kissed her and hugged her, and said to her, "I love you Yvgenia. You're my friend, and if I can help you feel better, or if I can help you with your diabetes, or maybe hold your hand when you have to get another shot, I want to do that, ok?"

"Ok," she said, smiling at me. "That's so sweet of you!" She kissed me.

I turned back to Kenji and Hiro and said, "I don't think you've met my pet boy."

"Pet boy?" asked Kenji. "I wondered why he was acting like a cute puppy. He is very cute."

"His name is Shlomo," I said, "and he is wearing my collar. That means I own him. He is my slave, but I just want him to be my pet boy. I don't want to do mean things to him like people do to proper slaves, but I want to make sure he's trained to obey me."

"If you keep a slave in Japan," said Kenji, looking frightened, "you will go to prison for many years. I am surprised you can do that here. I thought it was illegal around the world!"

"Oh he's not that kind of slave," I explained. "I didn't force him to become my slave. He wants to be my slave, and if he wants to stop being my slave, that's the end of it. He is always free. I have a lot to learn about how it works, but it turns him on to serve me. Just look at his big boner. Obeying me is like sex to him."

"Oh," said the brothers, looking at each other, obviously still confused by the whole thing.

"Watashi wa anata ga otokonoko wa hontōni kawaī to omou!" said a voice from behind us. Hiro and Kenji turned around and giggled at Yuko.

"Soshite anata wa totemo kireidesu! Ashita wa watashitachi ni totte tanoshī tsuitachi ni narimasu!" said Kenji.

"I think you are very pretty too!" said Hiro to Yuko.

"Papa says it is impolite to speak in a language that others in the room do not understand," said Kenji. "But it will be very nice to speak in our own language with you another time," he said, offering a head bow, which Yuko returned, followed by Hiro's quick head bow to her.

Shlomo had begun to feel like an anchor to me. As long as he was hugging my leg, it was difficult for me to walk around the room and mingle. "Shlomo," I said, "you are dismissed from your slave duties for now. It is time for us to visit and get to know each other."

"Yes Master. Thank you Master," he said before standing up and kissing me with his even sweeter little lips.

We sat around one of the larger tables, with one seat remaining empty. Adrian finally joined us just before lights-out. I learned that we turned our own lights out, so we could be a little late if we like, and the rule only said the main room lights had to be out. There was no rule about reading lights or other small lights, and there was no rule that said we had to go to bed. If someone did go to bed, we had to be quiet and not disturb them, and if someone had work to do in the morning, but hadn't gotten enough sleep because they'd stayed up too late, the studio would send people to their room to carry them to the set. Some kids did it just for fun. By the time their FSP got them ready, they were wide-awake and ready for work.

Adrian went around the room and kissed us all, one at a time. I introduced him to Hiro and Kenji, who smiled broadly when Adrian kissed them. "These little buggars are bloody cute! I heard the Harlows weren't coming back, and a new pair of brothers were moving in, but I hadn't heard how bloody sexy they were." The brothers looked down and giggled. "Are you two really that bashful? You'll soon be cured of that, trust me! Blimey Trevor, they're having me on, aren't they? Acting all shy and cute like that." I looked him in the eye, shook my head, slowly smiled, and got another hard stiffy. He was right. Their shyness made them even sexier.

We stayed around the table talking long after the lights were out. I learned that Igi was short for Igitioluwotilaiye, which I still can't pronounce or even spell without help. Her family had fled Nigeria to escape ahead of approaching terrorists. She said they called themselves the Boko Haram, and young girls were not safe anymore. Her father was an oncologist – a cancer doctor. He was able to get a UK medical license and settle his family in Sheffield. She missed her friends in Nigeria, and she wanted to try something new, to make more friends, which she was finding difficult at her school in Sheffield as a black immigrant. Her mum found an advert seeking kids to make child porn films. It was from one of the low-class production houses, but she did her research and learned which were the quality studios to work for. She was one of only two black girls who had active contracts with Frenetic, so she got a lot of work. I thought to myself she was probably the prettiest as well.

I also learned that Yvgenia had a reputation as a girl version of Sebastian. Well, nearly. She could take nearly anything up her ass, and it made her scream wildly. She couldn't deep throat though. She had given her virginity on camera to Sebastian only a month earlier. She'd made a lot of money for doing that, but she said she didn't do it for the money. Sebastian was a special boy to her, and she wanted to share that moment in her life with the rest of the world. Her parents signed her permission slip, and it was all done. She wanted to show us the video, but we weren't allowed to have the telly on after 11:00. She said she wanted to show me the next chance we had because I was her newest friend, and she wanted to share that moment with me. I remembered how important that moment was for Hannah, the Australian girl, but I think she seemed a little bonkers in the end.

Shlomo was born prematurely in a London hospital. He said that's why he's so small for his age. (It didn't explain his cuteness though, or his bizarrely huge cock.) He had worn glasses since long before he could remember. His family were Jewish immigrants from New York City. His mother wasn't happy that he worked in child porn, but his father was very proud of his boy's success. He liked doing scenes with men and older boys. He got a lot of work fucking older boys because of the size of his cock. Normally, when an eight year-old is cast with a fourteen year-old, it's the eight year-old who gets fucked, but when Shlomo's cock is bigger than the fourteen year-old's, it makes for great porn. Boy-boy scenes between littles are very popular, but they become much more popular when one of the little boys has a cock that's big enough to fuck properly, without all the effort of trying to insert only the tiny head.

There had also been many requests from girls for him to have their virginity, but so far he had refused. He was gay like me, but he wasn't as comfortable as I was doing scenes with girls. He had, however, done fluff work for girls he knew well, and there were some girls he liked to play with for fun. He also did the odd scene with women, but he had to like them a lot first. Apparently the women went crazy like Hannah when they felt so thoroughly filled up inside, but then looked down to see a cute, tiny little boy. It made them scream and howl.

Yuko's story reminded me of Annie's in some ways. She had a privileged upbringing in a large home in the Tokyo Prefecture. Her family was quite wealthy, and they traveled often. She spoke several languages besides Japanese and English. She was always adored by her parents, but everything changed when she realized she was a girl, not a boy.

She began dressing as a girl during school holidays, introducing herself as Yuko instead of her given name, Michiru. That was where her similarity to Annie ended. When she was nine, she returned to her private school in the fall dressed as a girl. She introduced herself as Yuko, and it didn't go very well at all. It wasn't only the children who mocked her. Her teacher did as well. Her parents still adored her and supported her, but other parents complained to the headmaster about allowing a 'girl-boy' to attend the elite school, and eventually she was expelled.

Her father's business suffered as rumors spread of his son being a whore and a prostitute. None of that was true, of course, but reputation can be everything in business. Her parents thought it might be best if she moved in with friends in England and attended a private school that was more supportive of transgender kids. She learned about the ladyboy culture in Thailand from some of the other Asian students at the school, and she wanted to be just like them, except she did not want to be a prostitute. Her host family suggested she try child porn instead, and she was hooked. She was really a male-to-female transgender girl, but she called herself a ladyboy because she identified with the sassy attitude many ladyboys seemed to have, and she fit right in with the other ladyboys who worked for Frenetic. Now her scenes were mostly with men, which she didn't mind one bit, but she still loved boys of all ages, especially cute littles. Especially cute Japanese littles.

Adrian's home life was a little like mine. He grew up on the wrong side of London in a poor family. He was small for his age, like Shlomo, but in Adrian's case it seemed it was because his mum smoked through her pregnancy with him. He was a Chelsea supporter, which for him meant he was surrounded by a lot of drunkenness and fighting. That was mostly down to his older brothers though. Chelsea FC have done a great deal of work to clear out that element of hooliganism, but there were still the hardcore 'ultras' like Adrian's brothers, who seemed impossible to stop. Adrian said he'd spent too much time with them and started to get in trouble himself. (At that point in his story I decided my Arsenal jersey would probably remain in a box in my closet.)

That was when his parents decided to get him away from all that and see if he could make it in child pornography. Frenetic rejected him the first time he applied, but he was signed to a contract with a studio called Starlight Cinematics. They're not a bad studio to work for, he said, but they're nothing like Frenetic. The most they would pay a boy for a scene was £1,500. There were no bonuses for anything, and if a boy refused to do a scene with kink or fetish parts, they could drop his contract. He gained exposure, and Frenetic eventually discovered his work. He was the perfect combination of sweet and innocent looks with a domineering personality, and Frenetic could no longer ignore his appeal. They bought out his contract from Starlight, and he moved straight into the dorms at the Frenetic lot, happy to be away from life in the tenement blocks.

The Watanabe boys told their story together. Their father had made a fortune on porn in Japan. He did not produce the porn, but he owned a large chain of stores and two distribution companies. He owned seven cable TV networks and one broadcast TV network. Two of his cable networks were dedicated to adult porn, one straight and one gay, and a third was dedicated to child porn. The subscription rate to the child porn network was three times as much as the adult channels, but more people subscribed to it than to the other two combined. He was considering an eighth network so he could separate the boy porn from the girl porn. There seemed to be a lot of demand, especially from his boy-loving customers for a boys-only network. There was real money to be made in child porn, and fans of child porn would pay a lot for the good stuff.

One evening, Mr. Watanabe had a business associate come to their home for supper. He showed his guest his porn networks on his enormous television, including his children's porn network, Chairudosekkusu, or CSTV. Hiro and Kenji were there, and they became fascinated by what they saw. They questioned him every day about how the films were made, where the children came from, and what it was like to be a child porn star. That was why he'd brought them to see my live show earlier that day, the day when their lives changed.

***

"I chose a dildo that was about as large as Randy's cock and lubed it up. 'Hold onto him now everybody,' I said. He moaned loudly as I began to move it in and out. I pressed it upward to try to reach that area behind his cock. His body bounced when I did that, so I did it again. 'Do you like this, Hiro?' I asked.

"'Yes,' he panted, 'Yes, please don't stop! It has been so…' He did not complete that sentence. Instead he chose a Japanese interjection that made Yuko and Kenji laugh."

Chapter 52
Night Life

One of the things I'd been looking forward to in room 46, was all the people to have sex with. I didn't really know how it worked in that room, or if there really were nightly orgies, but I sure hoped there were. Yvgenia didn't exactly say so, but my imagination was quite active. I was impatient to find out, but I was nervous. How would I bring it up? Would someone else say something first? I was feeling that nervous thrill that always made me horny, so I decided to get the conversation going by talking about the live performance the next day.

"Hiro, have you ever been fucked by older boys, or men?" I asked. "Can you do that?"

"Yes," said Hiro. "By some men in Japan, but they weren't very big. I don't know if they were even as big as Yuko or Shlomo."

"Hmm," I said, trying to sound like an important director. "It's important for the live show tomorrow. Do you think you could take a cock bigger than Yuko's?" I asked. The brothers looked at each other with what seemed a weird mixture of thrill and fear, but I could see Hiro was getting a little hard. "We should find out, I think." I nervously looked around the room to see if anyone had anything to say about the idea.

The brothers looked at each other again, smiling and giggling nervously. Hiro eventually nodded. "They are so cute!" said Yuko.

"Do it on the small table so we can gather round and see clearly," said Igi. "This must be a precise measurement." The others chuckled but agreed.

I was relieved, but I tried not to appear that way. I was the director. Hiro was mine, and he had instructions from his father to follow my suggestions. I had wanted to save Hiro for something special when we were in their father's limousine, and I had tried to work things out so he didn't cum. I had hoped I could have this little bit of fun with him in front of our new roommates, and it really would help me to figure out our scene for the following day. Which scepter would be best?

I whispered some instructions to Shlomo, who was seated immediately to my left, and he scurried off into my walk-in closet. Then Kenji and I steadied Hiro as he stepped up onto a chair, and then onto the table next to Igi's bed. I guided him by the hips to stand in front of me, facing away from me, so his ass was in my face. I reached around his hips and slowly slid his sparkly sexy bikini knickers down around his ass, allowing them to get hung up on his now rock-hard boner. I spread his ass cheeks with my hands and licked his hole, which made him giggle. I reached one hand up between his legs and grabbed his cock and his sexy yellow sparkly knickers, and I pulled the knickers down all the way to his ankles. He bent forward as I continued to lick his ass, holding him by his soft thighs.

I could hear Shlomo dragging a large box toward the table. I told Hiro to kneel down and scoot back to the edge of the table. When he did, I sat back in my chair and continued probing his sweet ass with my tongue. "Does anyone else fancy a taste?" I asked.

"I'll have some of that," said Adrian. I stood up again and let Adrian take over. I rummaged around in the box of sex toys that Shlomo had brought out of my closet, all the sex toys people had given me as signing gifts. I selected a variety of dildos, different shapes and sizes. "Do you need him back?" Adrian asked.

"If that's ok," I said. Shlomo had also brought a few towels from one of the bathrooms, and there was a wide selection of lubes in the box. I helped Hiro roll over onto his back. Adrian held Hiro's left leg, and little Shlomo held Hiro's right leg, which looked like it was more than the tiny boy could handle, but he was surprisingly strong. Yuko and Igi held his arms in place as well.

Yuko insisted that we pause for a moment while she told Hiro, in English and in Japanese, about the safe-word, and how to use it before we went any further. When she was done, everyone held on tight as I slathered lube over a small, narrow dildo, not much bigger than a finger. I pressed it against his hole gently, then more firmly. "Are you ready for the little one, Hiro?" I asked. When he nodded, I slid it in with very little effort. I moved it in and out several times and said to the others, "This isn't much of a challenge, is it?

"No!" they said as a group.

I left the first dildo in his ass and lubed up one that was larger. I pulled the first one out, then gently pressed the next one in. Hiro grunted softly and began to moan as I moved the dildo in and out, and around in circles to open him up. Hiro was clearly loving every bit of this. I couldn't tell if it was all the people watching or his own anal sensitivity, but he seemed somewhat distant from reality at that point.

I fucked him with that dildo for about three minutes before asking the room if he needed a bigger one. When they all agreed, I chose a dildo that was about as large as Randy's cock and lubed it up. "Hold onto him now everybody," I said. I fucked him fast with the second dildo before removing it and immediately inserting the third dildo, slowly but steadily. He moaned loudly as I began to move it in and out. I pressed it upward to try to reach that area behind his cock. His body bounced when I did that, so I did it again.

"Do you like this, Hiro?" I asked.

"Yes," he panted, "Yes, please don't stop! It has been so…" He did not complete that sentence. Instead he chose a Japanese interjection that made Yuko and Kenji laugh.

"My brother likes this very much," said Kenji.

"Perhaps we need a larger one?" I asked around the table.

The response was mixed, except from Hiro, who shouted, "Yes! Please!"

I continued to fuck him with the same dildo for a few more minutes, adding a stirring motion, as if I was stirring cookie dough with a spoon. He grunted and wailed as I continued. His eyes were squished closed, the same way Sebastian's were when he'd cum for love instead of the camera.

I decided the group knew much more than Hiro or I about how big a dildo should be for a particular boy. Instead of choosing a larger dildo, I kept fucking him with the one I had, and then I leaned over to suck his little boner at the same time. He screamed the moment my lips closed around his cock. I sucked him thoroughly, still pumping his ass full of dildo. He tried to get away, but everyone was holding him tight. He lifted Shlomo off the ground at one point when he was trying to kick his right leg free. I was sucking him through his orgasm, and he was not in control of his body. "Remember your safe word," Yuko said in English and in Japanese.

"No!" Hiro shouted. "No! I will… I want… I… Agghh!!!"

He had cum a second time. He did like performing for a crowd. Kenji chuckled and said, "Oh Brother! You can do anything!"

I kept sucking him and fucking him with the dildo until he was no longer hopping around, but I could see the muscles in his legs tensing. "One more?" I asked him. He grunted. I took that as my cue and fucked him faster with the dildo and sucked him harder. Everyone around the table put their hands on his body and stroked his skin, including his brother. (Apparently that wasn't considered sexual touch.) I used my left hand to stroke from his belly, over his hip, and onto his upper thigh and back again. A slow growl grew into a loud howl, and the bouncing boy was back! We all held him in place this time, but I withdrew the dildo, and I held his cock inside my still mouth. Adrian and Shlomo released his legs, and everyone applauded. I sucked as I lifted my head, allowing his cock to pop out, and I joined in the applause. Hiro was completely out of breath, his cock was soft within seconds after I'd released it, and his body was limp. He rolled his head to face his brother. They smiled at each other and began another giggle fit.

***

"Who else wants to play?" asked Yuko.

Everybody but Hiro and Yvgenia raised their hands.

"Can I play with Yuko and Kenji?" I asked

"We don't usually do it that way," said Yuko. "We just look at who's hands are up right now. Then we go to our own beds and turn off all our lamps and reading lights so it's completely dark. Someone will say 'go', and if there's someone we want to play with, we can go to their bed and see if they are there. Otherwise we can stay in our own bed and see who shows up. Anybody who joins somebody at their bed is allowed to stay, no matter who it is, so if you stay in your own bed, that means you want to have sex with everybody who has their hand up, girls and boys. You may not talk until everyone has found partners. But remember, since Hiro and Yvgenia don't have their hands up, no one is allowed to go to their beds."

"Which beds are Hiro and Kenji in?" asked Igi.

The brothers looked at each other. I helped Hiro off the table, stealing a kiss and a hug, and they decided that Hiro would have the bed on the end, and Kenji's bed would be between Hiro's and Yuko's.

I handed the used dildos to Shlomo and told him to wash them. He began licking them, so I added "with soap and water!" I certainly knew which special scepter I would use in the live show the next day.

***

"Go!" called Igi's voice. We had all brushed our teeth, and Shlomo had cleaned the dildos and put the box away in my closet. Everything was done, and the lights were all off.

I stood up, but I didn't know where to go. I wanted to play with Yuko and Kenji, so I thought I would go to Kenji's bed and ask quietly if he wanted to join me at Yuko's bed, but Kenji wasn't at his bed. I went to Yuko's bed, and there was no one there either. I'd missed them both.

I sat on Yuko's bed, wondering what to do. Just then, someone sat next to me, on my right. I felt a soft hand on my left arm. I reached over to touch the body next to me with my right when a third body alit upon the other side of the bed, behind the two of us. The hand held my right arm in place while another probed around my body, down my belly, and onto my instantly hard cock. I reached with my right hand to feel who it was when they abruptly bent over and began sucking my cock. I gasped, stifling a yelp, because talking was not allowed. Now I'd never be able to feel his cock. It felt like a bigger body than mine, for sure, but that could be Yuko, Igi, or… I realized it could only be Yuko or Igi.

I lay back on the bed to enjoy my blowjob, and the person behind me did the same. I reached my right hand over and felt another larger body. Igi and Yuko? It was hard to concentrate with the magical feeling of the blowjob I was getting from the mystery sucker, but I ran my right hand down to feel what would either be a cock or a pussy on the body who'd sat behind me. It was a cock, a very big cock. Only two people in this room had cocks that size, and Shlomo was far too little to be the person behind me. Yuko had come back! I finally got to feel those big, soft African lips on my cock. It was everything I had dreamed of!

I took Yuko's cock in my hand, and it unfurled slowly and dramatically. I began to stroke it when I felt another body sit on the bed to my left. This had to be a smaller body, much smaller than Yuko, who was the biggest person in the room. The person on my right, who was probably Igi, sat up and released my left arm, and the small person took over my blowjob. He couldn't take it as deep as Igi had done, but small mouths feel sweeter somehow, and this mouth was also very determined to give me pleasure. Then Igi revealed herself when she turned around, crawled over my body, and began kissing me. There was no mistaking it now.

Igi crawled farther up my body and began to suck Yuko's cock. Igi's pussy was right above my face. Was I supposed to lick it, like I had done with Claire? It wasn't so bad, and I had found that spot behind her clit that she really liked. I leaned my head back and wrapped my arms around Igi's hips, pulling her pussy down to my face. Clearly, she had held herself up so I could be the one to decide whether I wanted to eat her pussy. She wasn't going to force it on me.

It had to be a boy giving me the blowjob. That meant Adrian, Kenji, or Shlomo. I never realized how hot it would be to get a blowjob from a friend I loved but didn't know who it was!

Igi gyrated her hips, pressing her pussy into my face. I licked all around the ordinary places, remembering that girls didn't like it when you go for the really sensitive parts first. I could hear her moaning though as she sucked on Yuko's cock. I wondered if kids in the other dorm rooms played this game at night.

My wonderful blowjob came to an end. I felt the boy climb onto the bed and straddle me. He knelt down facing Igi's ass and slowly settled his ass down on my cock. That felt good! I rewarded the good feeling by passing it on to Igi by sliding two of my fingers into her pussy. Her body shook for a second, and she pulled her mouth off of Yuko's cock long enough to give a high-pitched yelp. I probed around inside her pussy as the boy's ass moved up and down over my cock. I went for the spot that I had found on Claire. I felt behind her bone and found that soft spot right in the middle. I rubbed it gently. She barked as she coughed out Yuko's cock. I rubbed it a little more aggressively as she tried unsuccessfully to get Yuko's cock back in her mouth. She began to cry out. She seemed to lose control, like Claire had done, and like Hiro had just done. I kept at it and she screamed! I could taste something a little different in her pussy juice, just like when Claire came. I didn't want Igi to get Yuko's cock back inside her mouth because I wanted Yuko to cum inside my mouth! That was selfish of me, but I didn't think either of them would complain after Igi's intense orgasm and after I deep throated Yuko.

But who was the boy riding my cock? I couldn't feel him just yet with Igi's screaming and wailing body requiring both of my hands, one to hold onto her and one to rub her special spot. I began to rub harder, and she screamed again and rolled off urgently. "Boy!" she panted. "How did you learn to treat a pussy like that?"

"Dunno," I said, "Just did."

She huffed and huffed to catch enough air to make it to her bed, the next bed over. "Damn boy!" she said, "You work with women, you will make a lot of money. All the women porn stars are gonna know you!"

"Trevor?" came a groaning voice from above. It was the boy who was riding my cock. "I hoped it was you!" It was Kenji! I wanted to play with Kenji and Yuko, and they were both here!

"Me too!" I said. "Yuko, you have to put your cock in my mouth. You know what I can do with it!"

She stood up on the floor. Then I could feel her pulling my arms, sliding my head off the edge of the bed, with Kenji riding along, and I let my head hang back. Soon her cock was entering my mouth. She thrust it in and out, but I wanted to give her the rest of the deep throat I had started earlier that day. I reached around her ass with both of my arms and pulled her in hard. A couple tries was all it took to get her cock all the way in. Once I got her face-fucking me balls deep on her own, and I had found my breathing rhythm, I turned my attention to sweet Kenji. I couldn't see him, and it really was difficult to feel him with Yuko's cock pounding my throat. I stroked his thighs, and Yuko's thrusts got faster and harder. It's odd that the faster she went, the less I wanted to gag. Soon I could hear her kissing Kenji. Then she began to moan, louder and louder, fucking my throat faster and faster. I was such a lucky boy to have learned so young how to please both cocks and pussies!

She was growling now, and soon it became a wail. She shoved her cock deep into my throat, and I tried to swallow a few times, but her cock was in the way. It seemed her cum must have gone straight down into my stomach. I wanted to taste her cum, but I wanted to give her pleasure too. It felt nice having her relaxing cock in my throat, though I couldn't keep it there too long. I had to breathe soon.

I heard Shlomo screaming from the other side of the room, and I knew who he was with.

Yuko gently pulled her cock from my throat and mouth. I was able to taste a trail of cum as she did, and I was even able to suck a bit off the tip. She sat down next to my head, turned to her side, and began to suck Kenji's cock. That made his ass twitch, and I finally began to pay attention to my own cock. As Kenji got more and more excited, he wailed louder and louder. His ass twitched as spasms ran through his body. Yuko slapped his ass, and he suddenly clenched hard onto my cock. I was cumming! I grunted as I grasped his hips, moving him faster; his voice is what did it. His wailing penetrated my ears and went right to the love center in my brain. Nothing mattered because all was pleasure exceeding pleasure. I was unaware of what sounds I might have made, but I became aware that I was not the only one making them. The great drilling machine between Kenji and me had stopped, and Adrian was also howling on the other side of the room.

"Are you ok, Igi" I asked.

"Fine, dear crazy boy!" she said. "You do such a thing with my body and you must ask? Oh, I am doing quite well, thank you!"

"I just hoped I didn't hurt you," I said.

"Crazy dear boy! Think of the exact opposite thing to severe pain. Now can you imagine severe pleasure? No boy, no hurt!" She laughed deeply. "Crazy dear boy!"

Yuko leaned over me and kissed me deeply. "I'll be looking for your bed in future, that's for sure!"

Kenji leaned forward and lay on top of me. He also kissed me deeply, letting his tongue mingle with mine. After we had lazily ended the kiss, he said, "Papa said you were a good friend and mentor. What he did not say is that you were also a beautiful lover." He kissed me again and rolled off the bed to go to his own bed. I felt a twinge of sadness letting him go.

"I suppose you need to go to bed and all," I said to Yuko.

"I've got a morning scene and an afternoon live show, so I should get some sleep, yes."

"Ok," I said, grudgingly standing up. "You know, Boris is right. You ladyboys are bloody sexy!" She kissed me, and I returned to my own bed.

"Boy," I said to Shlomo, "Come here. Come to my bed."

"Yes Master." The tiny boy crawled in bed with me. I kissed his sweet, tiny lips again, and I held his naked little body as we slept. It was my first night away from Randy's house. I needed a teddy bear, but I learned a little teddy boy could be much nicer.

"It was then that I put a few facts together for the first time. Rather, my pet boy Shlomo put them together for me. The first fact was that I had an unusually long cock for a boy my age. It wasn't huge or thick or anything, but it was rather long. The second fact was that Shlomo was unusually small for his age, and he therefore had an unusually small mouth. The remaining facts were that Shlomo was both highly skilled at sex acts and completely dedicated to his master."

Chapter 53
Dreamy Wake-Up

Thursday, July 19

The most beautiful feeling permeated my body. It was a dream – a dream of a very cute boy, smiling at me and giving me pleasure that I never thought I'd have in my miserable life. I didn't want to return to Mum's manky old flat just yet. I wanted to dream a little longer before I opened my eyes to see what new mess Ian had made of my things. Maybe he'd peed on me in the night again. I didn't want to know. I was happy here in my wonderful dream with my teddy boy.

As my eyes cracked open I looked down to see Shlomo sucking my cock in long, slow, loving strokes. There was none of Ian's pee on me. I was not in Mum's flat. It was real! When he saw me move my head in his direction, he smiled his most adorable smile and said, "Good morning, Master!" Then he resumed my blowjob with renewed vigor. I do love it when dreams come true!

***

Adrian had left earlier to find fluff work, and Yuko and Igi had also left early to do scenes with 8:00 call times. Yvgenia was still asleep, and the Watababe boys were watching Shlomo provide his service to me.

"Good morning, Trevor!" they both said cheerfully, with their permanently affixed smiles.

They were wearing their own suits again with the embarrassingly short trousers, neckties, and caps. Their white socks went up almost to their knees though, which I thought looked sexy – boys wearing short shorts with long socks. Their agent had arranged for them to have their appointments that day with Dr. Benson, the studio's pediatrician, Linda, the child psychologist (who was properly called Dr. Bates), and Dr. Gupta in the Rectum Center. Shlomo had a man-boy scene in the afternoon, but nothing scheduled in the morning, so he'd decided to spend the morning with me, instead of finding fluff work. He was in very high demand for fluff work, being the sweetest little and the littlest sweetie at Frenetic, but he disliked fluff work, so he didn't do it very often. He told me he would fluff for me anytime though. As his master, I could command him to fluff for me, as long as he didn't have a scene to shoot or any appointments, but if he wanted to do fluff work, or any other kind of work, I had decided that was something I would never interfere with.

A knock at our open door interrupted my now-waking dream, but Shlomo didn't pause. A woman with a KCU badge came to me as I lay there in pleasure and said, "Ah, good morning, Mr. Hawk."

It's funny how quickly I felt normal and unembarrassed about being naked everywhere I went, but every now and then, and at that moment, I felt a startle of doubt that it was really ok to do anything sexual in front of other people, especially adults. I looked down at Shlomo, who sucked a little harder. I think he could feel my startle, and he didn't want it to ruin my pleasure.

"Here is your KCU health certificate," said the woman as Shlomo pressed down mightily on my cock, and for the first time I heard him gag on it. I felt a shiver as the woman handed me a plastic card with my picture on it. I was surprised and confused by how much having a boy struggle to please me… pleased me. "You need to have this certificate in order to be allowed to perform sexually, either on-camera or off," the woman said. Shlomo pressed my cock in deep again, gagged one more time, and it occurred to me then just what he'd intended to do. "I'll need you to look everything over to make sure all the information is correct to the best of your knowledge," she continued. I felt a popping sensation, as if my cock was a cork stuck in a champagne bottle, that was accompanied by the most indescribable pleasure I'd ever known. "You need to have this certificate renewed monthly for it to remain valid." I howled loudly with my eyes surely bulging. My cock had slid into his straining throat and was being blissfully strangled! In a way it seemed that both my cock and my boy were being choked, which was an ecstasy that I had never expected nor understood.

The woman paused, looking at Shlomo, who seemed to be in a reality of his own. Hiro and Kenji were standing still with incredulous grins on their faces. "You don't need to keep it on your person," she continued, "but you should keep it in a safe place. Frenetic has a copy of this on file." I was gasping and panting, having forgotten about my doubts about being in front of people. My boy's deep-throat blowjob was too good to worry about such things. I had given a few deep-throat blowjobs in the past few days, but I could only guess what it felt like. Now I knew, and it was not what I had expected. It was so much more. "If you ever leave Frenetic and sign with another studio, they will ask to see this certificate. If they don't ask, leave that studio immediately, because that is an indication that they are not a safe place to work." I felt my entire body spasm. I shrieked! I was exploding, and love was the fuel. I loved this cute, sweet little boy! I loved him so much I wanted to squeeze his adorable little head with my clenching thighs. (So I did.) I loved everyone! "I'll just leave this here, shall I?" she said as she wrenched the card from my grasping hand and placed it on my end table.

A stirring from the bed to my left told us that Yvgenia had awoken, undoubtedly from all of my howling. "Oh, good morning, Yvgenia," said the woman.

Yvgenia yawned. "Good morning, Maria," she said in her usual monotone. "Come to tell me some more bad news?"

"Oh, nothing of the sort, dear," Maria said cheerfully. "My business here is with Trevor today, but it's always lovely to see you."

"Sure it is," said Yvgenia, rolling over to face the window.

Shlomo wasn't going to stop unless I made him stop, so I pushed his head away and told him, "Thank you boy. That was incredible! I thought I'd have to wait until puberty before I could get deep throat. I'll want loads more of this I'm sure." He scurried up to my face and kissed me, then curled up next to me in my arm.

"I'm sorry," I said breathlessly to Maria. "I was a little preoccupied."

"I could tell," she said with a wink.

I picked up the card and looked at it again. It had my picture on it. I didn't remember having that picture taken, but it was a very good one. I was taken by a shivering aftershock from my orgasm before I could ask, "Sorry, what's this card for again?"

"It is a certificate that says you have been properly checked out and looked after in order to work safely in child pornography."

The card was the size of my Visa card. It had a large KCU logo on the front. The title "Child Pornography Wellness Certificate" was printed across the top. It listed my agent and solicitor with their phone numbers, KCU's emergency response number, the phone number to the clinic, an identification number, and the rating "Class A: Approved for all standard performance categories. See reverse for details." My signature appeared under my picture, and the expiration date of 19/8/2018 was just below my signature. On the reverse were four items with dates next to them: General Pediatric, Gastroenterologic, Psychologic, and Legal Representation. The first three had the date 18/7/2018, and the last had 16/7/2018. Below these items were the following comments:

GP – NR, rec exercise pgm

GI – NR, x-anal 2x/wk, more if no pain, rec Kegel, PAF 1.0

Psy – NR, wkly f/u reqd ufn, rec stress mgmt

Lgl – KCU rep w/POA, contract w/Frenetic, exp. 15/7/2019

There was also a black strip on the back and a chip, just like the one in my Visa card. "I see. So if I didn't have this, I couldn't work?" I asked.

"If you didn't have that, then you shouldn't work in child pornography because it would be unsafe or unhealthy. That's what this certificate tells the producers. They need to know they aren't hurting you by having you perform in their films and such."

"What does all this stuff mean?" I asked. "What is X-dash-anal… all that stuff?"

"That stands for extreme anal," she said. Taking the card from me, she said, "It says you are approved to do extreme anal twice each week, and more if you feel no pain. It also says you should do Kegel exercises."

I had just woken up, and I'd just had a lovely orgasm. My mind wasn't together yet, and I wasn't sure I was following her. For sure I didn't know what Kegel exercises were, though I would learn soon enough. "How can I tell if I'm doing extreme anal?" I asked. "Is a man's cock extreme anal? What if it's super-big?"

"A man's penis would have to be 'super-big' as you say in order to be considered extreme. The size changes as you grow. There are formulas we use, but each child's capacity is different, so those formulas include a personal adjustment factor, or PAF." She looked at my card again and said, "I see your PAF is one. That is the PAF of the average adult man. Such a high PAF and twice-weekly extreme anal are very unusual for a little boy. But, back to your question. Each actor knows his size, and your director, stage manager, agent, or the KCU supervisor on your set will tell you if it's extreme for you."

"But what if I'm the director, and I don't know?"

"Then congratulations! A boy your age rarely has that opportunity. In that case, the actor himself can tell you what PAF is considered extreme for his own penis, but it's better if your agent works out the numbers. That way we have someone checking to make sure things are going to fit."

"Ok," I said, "Thanks."

"Just keep that certificate somewhere safe, and I'll bring you a new one next month."

"Ok, thanks," I said. I kissed Shlomo quickly, rolled out of bed, and stood up to kiss her, but then I remembered the rule with KCU people. I had to ask. "I love everybody, even bad people, and I love you too, so can I kiss you goodbye?"

"I'm sorry," she said with a pleasant smile, "but I am uncomfortable kissing children when they are naked. I would prefer a handshake, and I would like it very much if I could have a kiss next time I see you with your clothes on. If you like, you can even stop by the KCU office and collect that kiss any time I'm in. Would that be ok?"

"That would be fine," I said. The way she said that made me feel good. It was the first time at Frenetic that someone had said no when I asked for a kiss, but she made sure I knew that she wanted a kiss, but everyone is allowed to say no if they feel uncomfortable. After we shook hands, she said goodbye and left us.

The grandfather clock by our double doors read 7:45. I had to be in the recording studio by 8:30. "Would you like breakfast, Master?" asked Shlomo as he rolled out of my bed and knelt next to me on the floor, hugging my leg.

"Yeah," I said. Turning to Kenji and Hiro, I asked, "Will you join us?" They looked at each other and smiled, as usual, and nodded. "I need to shower first, and so does my boy." I turned back to Shlomo and said, "Remove your cuffs and come with me. Leave your collar on." He followed me into the shower and washed me thoroughly with soap and a washcloth, paying special attention to my hole and my cock. I washed my own hair because Shlomo couldn't reach it very easily, and I didn't want him to slip and fall. I scrubbed off the last traces of my purple lipstick. Shlomo used the opportunity to wash himself.

Yvgenia joined us in the showers. Shlomo and I were sharing one, and she used the shower facing ours. "Hi boys," she said. "I'm sorry I was a bit ratty when Maria was here. Usually when I see her, she has more bad news for me. I just don't want to see her anymore, especially when I first wake up."

I held onto a towel rack and leaned over to kiss her. "Can I watch you clean yourself?" I asked her. "I just… remember I told you, I don't know much about girls' bodies, and I want to learn more from you."

"Of course, silly boy!" she said, with her first smile of the day. "We're friends, remember?"

She did everything the same as boys did, only she didn't have to wash under her scrotum or foreskin. She spread her legs and simply rubbed a soapy washcloth in and around her pussy. "That's all you have to do?" I asked. "Only my brother said girls have to squirt water with stinky stuff up their pussies and clean them out, almost like a pussy enema. He likes having me on."

"He wasn't having you on this time," she said. "Women and older girls do that once they reach puberty, and some younger girls do it too. It's called a douche. It's like boys. Your cocks smell fine before puberty, but then you get a smeggy smell from juice that comes out under your foreskin. When you reach puberty, you need to pay special attention under there. Most older actors wash it out just before each scene, and most actresses douche before each scene. It's a courtesy, like having an enema before an anal scene."

"I hope people help me with all these rules and courtesies," I said. "There are so many I don't know."

She giggled and said, "You'll be fine. You're really sweet, and everybody helps the new kids. If you didn't know to have an enema and there was a mess, everyone would still be nice and teach you what to do. Actors have seen that lots, and no one gets upset. A little brown cleans up easily, and you saw how quick it is to do an enema with the set nurse, right? Besides, you didn't know, and you didn't do it on purpose."

"You look just like a naked boy," I said, "only you have a pussy. I thought girls would look different somehow."

She stepped across to the shower that Shlomo and I were using. I told Shlomo to dry off and put his cuffs back on. "Look really closely at my nipples and your nipples," she said. "Do you see it?" I didn't know what I was supposed to see. "Mine are just a little bigger than yours, and if you touch them – go ahead – you can tell mine are a little softer underneath."

She was right. "I see," I said. "Is that because you are starting to grow breasts?"

"I hope not," she said, "but Dr. Benson says maybe it is. I don't want to have breasts! I don't want to be a woman! I want to be a girl! I want to stay here and work in the Children's Division, but I can't work now, and maybe I'll be too old by the time they say I can work again."

I didn't know what to say. I didn't want her to be upset again, so I hugged her. After a while I said, "You can't perform for them, but you can sure play with us anytime. It might make you feel better." She nodded. "Would you like to join us for breakfast?" I asked her.

"Yes please," she said. "I'd like that."

Then I felt a little embarrassed by the next question I had to ask, and I did so quietly. "How do I… I mean, I will be doing anal today, and I don't know where to… where the stuff is…"

"Oh, you need an enema?" she asked in her normal voice. I thought I should no longer be embarrassed about enemas after my experiences with Nurse Dan and Nurse Blaine the previous day, but for some reason, falling asleep and starting a new day seemed to reset my embarrassment. "You can do it here by yourself in the toilet. The supplies are in the cabinet. I like to go to the Rectum Center though and have them do it for me. They are very thorough, and very friendly. It makes it a lot nicer when a friendly person does it, and I can be sure during my ATM scenes that I won't have any surprises."

"You mean, I can just walk in and they'll do it?" I asked. She nodded encouragingly. "Nurse Blaine did my enemas for my appointment with Dr. Gupta yesterday. I know what you mean about nice, friendly people doing it. I love Nurse Blaine."

"So do I!" she said. "They're all super nice there. They love us kids, and for some reason they all seem to love flushing all the poop out of us. I don't get it, but I'm glad they do."

After we had dried ourselves off, I noticed Shlomo had obediently put his cuffs on. I attached his leash and said to him, "Put on the makeup Consuela gave you yesterday. Remember, only a little! Cute, not pretty." He nodded enthusiastically and scampered into his walk-in closet with his leash proudly dangling behind.

Yvgenia stood next to me, and I didn't know why. "Don't you need to get dressed for breakfast?" I asked.

"Oh why bother," she said. "Dining halls in the dorms and apartments don't require clothing, so I'm going as I am, if that's all right?"

"Of course it's all right," I said. "I mean, is that all right, boys?" I asked Hiro and Kenji. After all, they were part of our breakfast party too.

They looked at each other again with wide smiles, modest giggles, and raised eyebrows and nodded happily. Kenji said, "Of course it's all right. She is pretty, and we will have a pretty sight at our breakfast table." I could detect a hint of his father in that comment.

"Oh! You're so sweet!" said Yvgenia as she ran to kiss Kenji. "And you as well," she said before kissing Hiro.

***

I stared at the clothes in my walk-in closet, finding it difficult to decide what to wear. I settled on my white shoes, white tube socks, white fringed leather vest, and the matching white fringed leather bikini knickers. I decided not to wear a thigh chain, but I did wear a chain around my neck with a small black onyx to accent the white outfit. I decided to wear the white tube socks so I would match the Watanabe boys in at least one way.

I sat at my makeup table and applied the same cute boy makeup that Consuela had suggested – just a little lipstick rubbed in, thin eyeliner, and a little mascara, mostly in the corners. The effect was stunning! I was a boy again, but I was pretty in a boy way now. Saying I was cute wasn't quite enough, but it made me very happy.

I stepped out into the room smiling and did a twirl for my roommates. They all clapped playfully for me, the little diva. I looked in the full-length mirror, and I was breathtaking! I wanted to walk into Preston Primary looking like this and see the looks on their faces! But they're all such stupid thugs, they wouldn't recognize a beautiful boy if he sat on their face and farted. I decided they would probably pick on me all the more, until they saw me drive off in my own Jaguar E-Type.

"The only thing I wish I had was a pair of long, white boots with fringes instead of the socks and shoes," I said.

"I bet they have those at Almost Heaven," said Yvgenia.

"What's that?" I asked.

"That's the clothing store attached to the pub," she said. "Oh it's brilliant! I'd love to go shopping with you there if you like."

"Ok!" I said, happy that there appeared to be something she was looking forward to. "My agent has me busy in the recording studio until 10:30, and then I'm supposed to…" I didn't want to talk about Mr. Buford or the detective from Scotland Yard. Not now. Not when Yvgenia seemed to be feeling better. "I'm supposed to have some sort of meeting with Randy… my agent. That should be over around eleven. We could go shopping then, if that works for you."

"I'd like that," she said as she leaned in for a kiss.

Yvgenia had to leave right away for the dining hall because she had to meet a nurse downstairs to get two shots before breakfast.

***

We sat at a round table for five in the dining hall. Yvgenia and Shlomo were sitting naked to my left and my right, Hiro and Kenji were sitting fully clothed next to Yvgenia and Shlomo. I was dressed somewhere in-between in my small, open vest and tiny white bikini knickers. When Yvgenia had said clothes were not required in the residential dining halls, I'd ordered Shlomo to remain naked. I think he was normally naked all day anyway. I think he liked all the looks he got because of his big cock. Now I loved those same looks too because I was the one holding his leash. His big, beautiful cock belonged to me!

The selections for breakfast included everything from nearly everywhere around the globe! The menus were as thick as magazines. I ordered a simple English breakfast: a soft boiled egg, a kipper, beans and toast, and orange juice. Yvgenia frowned at the server and said, "My usual, please." Shlomo asked for something that sounded like locks and beagles with milk, and Hiro and Kenji ordered fish with seaweed, rice, and tea.

The thought of eating seaweed was very strange to me, but I said nothing. Mr. Watanabe wanted to experience customs and cultures in the places he visited, so I decided I wanted to experience customs and cultures from the places my friends came from. That meant not saying anything impolite when they ordered seaweed.

Kenji leaned forward and said, "Yvgenia, I hope this is not impolite, but may I ask what is your usual? you did not seem happy to order it."

"I'm not," she said. "I have diabetes, and that means that I have to take a lot of shots, and the doctors and the dieticians decide what I eat for every meal. For a while anyway. Soon I will get to decide what I eat, but they will decide how much, and I always have to eat everything on my plate."

***

When our food arrived, I was glad I didn't have to finish everything on my plate, like Yvgenia did. The kipper was very large, and beans on toast meant two slices of toast with what looked like a whole tin of beans. My orange juice came in a half-pint glass (which is considerably larger than a half-pint in the US), though my egg was just an egg, boiled to perfection and served hot. It was all delicious! And the beans didn't taste like any beans I'd had before. There was no way I could finish all of it.

I looked at Yvgenia's plate of food, and it didn't look too bad really. Her orange juice was half the size of mine though. She had one small banger sausage that didn't look quite right and a small portion of beans on a half-slice of toast. Her plate was garnished with a piece of cheese and a piece of melon.

"That's not too bad," I said, trying to sound sympathetic yet encouraging. "I think I could actually finish that much."

"You can have it then," she said with a sour tone in her voice.

"I'm sorry, Yvgenia," I said. "I was trying to be cheerful, but it didn't work."

She turned to me and kissed me. "It worked," she said with a sniffle. "You're such a sweet boy!"

"Would anyone like to taste some seaweed and rice?" asked Kenji. "Yvgenia, a small spoonful won't matter, will it?"

She looked at Kenji with a smile and said, "Oh yes, please! I'd love to taste something new for a change." She pushed her plate toward Kenji's, and he dolloped a spoonful onto Yvgenia's plate.

"Trevor?" he asked, looking at me.

"Yes, thank you," I said, feeling a little nervous about eating seaweed.

"Let me, Brother," said Hiro. The younger boy scooped a small portion of rice and seaweed onto my plate. At the same time, Kenji scooped a small amount onto Shlomo's plate.

It was almost like a toast. We all looked at each other, then we tasted the rice and seaweed together. There was something a little nasty about it, like salty, dead fish, but that was just a part of the flavor. The rest of the flavor was quite nice.

Shlomo reached for his milk glass right away. When he'd finished a few gulps, he looked down with embarrassment, but the Watanabe boys shared a giggle, and Kenji said to him cheerfully, "Our food is not for everyone, but thank you for trying something from our home."

"I quite liked it," said Yvgenia. "It reminds me in a strange way of caviar."

"Yes," said Hiro. "Very salty, very fishy taste."

***

We managed to keep Yvgenia in reasonably good cheer through breakfast. When we had finished eating, I asked her, "Would you like to borrow my boy until I meet you for shopping at eleven?" He stood up and went to her side, giving her a nice kiss.

"He is the cutest… I mean, why not?" she said, giving the slightest glance down toward his enormous penis. "He is cheerful too, and I know you have to go to work now, and Hiro and Kenji have to be in the clinic at nine."

"Ok, he's yours," I said, kissing her. "Boy, make her smile. That is your duty, and your only duty until I see you again. Use whatever you have," I said, reaching down to take his monstrous cock into my hand. "Whatever it takes."

"Yes Master," he said with a broad grin that told me he had a few ideas. I knew he didn't particularly like girls sexually, but he had a command from his master, and I think that made it thrilling for him. Besides, Yvgenia was his friend, and he shared my love for making people feel good.

I kissed Shlomo's sweet little lips and handed his leash to Yvgenia. She disconnected it from him and said, "If he is mine for the next few hours, let him prove it by staying with me without being forced. If I need a leash, I'll improvise," she said, grabbing hold of his cock. "Come with me, boy."

"Yes, Mistress," said Shlomo. He was definitely hardening as he followed her out of the dining hall.

Chapter 54
Voiceover

I met Randy on my way to the office building basement, where the voiceover recording studios were. He was just stepping out of the pub, where they serve breakfast with famously good coffee. (I don't like coffee, but that's what people say.) Randy told me their coffee is made from coffee beans mixed with some kind of wild cat poop, and that was supposed to make it good. People at the studio could play jokes just like everywhere else, but Randy always told me the truth. He never seemed to make things up just to have me on, but cat poop coffee? There were a lot of things that went on at Frenetic that I would think were nasty as time went on, so maybe he was telling me the truth.

"Hello, Hawk!" said Randy. He handed me a warm half-liter bottle of water. "You'll need that for your recording session," he said.

"Warm?" I asked.

"Room temperature," he said. "If it's cold, it can cause your voice muscles to tense up." He took a sip of his coffee and said, "Hawk, you look fantastic! That outfit really suits you!"

"Thanks," I said. "It's one of those I bought from Gold Boys of Chelsea. I need matching boots though."

"I think the shoes and knee socks look lovely," he said.

"I like them too," I said, "but Yvgenia says there's a clothing store there next to the pub." I saw the store for the first time and pointed to it. "There it is, Almost Heaven. She says they probably have some lovely white boots to match this outfit, so we're going shopping after I'm finished with the detective."

"Oh, how lovely!" said Randy. "It'll be nice to see poor Yvgenia out and about. She has been so miserable since she found out about her diabetes. Do you see, Trevor? You have amazing powers to make people happy!"

"That's not what you mean!" I said, play-punching his shoulder.

He tickled my belly and said, "Near enough! The truth is that you try very hard because it's important to you to make people happy if you can." He paused and said, "Oh! The helicopter pilot said he is available anytime between 11:30 and 1:00 this afternoon. You can bring Yvgenia along if you like, and even your pet boy Shlomo."

"Wow, cool!" I said. "Thanks!"

***

We entered the door marked 'Studio C' and met a man with long gray hair combed neatly over the back of his head. "Trevor Hawk, this is Norman Lucan. Norman, Trevor." I stood up on my toes and kissed him.

"Very good to meet you," he said in a soft voice with an American or Canadian accent.

"Norman is the sound director for your promo film," said Randy.

"Nice to meet you," I said.

"And seated over there at the console," said Norman, "Is Gary Putnam. He is our engineer for this session."

Norman closed the door behind us, and I felt suddenly deaf. I was awe-stricken whenever I entered a recording studio. There was so much equipment with so many flashing lights and wobbly needle-looking things, but also that inescapable feeling of being part deaf.

Norman and Randy started going over the script and working out different ideas that sounded quite technical, so I wound my way around Norman and gave Gary a kiss, which made him smile. He gave me a hug too. "I've been waiting to meet you, Trevor," he said, holding his hands on my hips. That seemed like good touch. "A boy like you doesn't come along very often. Would you like to sit with me while Norman and Randy work things out? Maybe you'd like to learn what some of this equipment does?"

"Yes please," I said. "I'd like that."

"Those are some far-out duds!" he said. I smiled and thanked him, not knowing what duds were, and suddenly feeling a bit bashful. He was a muscular man with a long, brown mustache that wrapped around his lip and went down to his chin. His brown hair was very long and straight. He kept a pair of eyeglasses on the big console in front of him that he wore only when he had to look at his equipment. His voice was very clearly American.

He pulled a chair from his other side and rolled it toward me. "Can I sit here instead?" I asked, pointing to his lap.

"Hang on a sec," he said. "Randy, he's asking to sit on my lap while I show him around. Is that cool?"

"If he asks, it's fine. He's asking and consenting for himself now. Paperwork's in place."

"Gotcha." He looked at me and said, "I heard what happened to you yesterday with that piece a' shit Buford. I'm sorry about that, and I want to make sure everything is ok before I touch you closely, even if it's not sexual. You really are an incredibly beautiful boy, and no one wants you to get hurt anymore or feel uncomfortable."

"Because I'm so beautiful?" I asked.

"No," he said. "Because you're a Frenetic kid." He picked me up and set me on his lap, and I was lost in thought about what he had said. It sounded so lovely, and I believed him when he said it. This seemed to be a man who loved children.

"Do you have kids?" I asked.

"I have a daughter who is sixteen, but I haven't seen her since she was three," he said. "Why do you ask?"

"You seem so nice," I said, "and you don't know me. You already want to look after me without knowing me. I think you'd be a brilliant dad."

"Thanks," he said, kissing me. "It could happen again."

He showed me a large window above the console. He said I would be in that room, speaking into the microphone. I would see the video on a monitor, and the words I was to speak would appear on the monitor, over the video. "We control that right here," he said, indicating a computer. "This is what it will look like to you."

He made a few mouse clicks, and there I was, leading Shlomo around by his leash. Then words appeared over us that read, "I like to explore new things with new people, and sometimes other people explore new things with me."

"See how that works? It's that simple."

"That's brilliant!" I said. "They didn't have anything like this at studio D. I just stood at the microphone and read lines that Randy printed out on paper. They made them match the film later. I couldn't read fast enough to do it well, so I had to remember the lines and say them out loud, one at a time."

"We can do that too," he said, "and we will if we have to, but it makes for a more organic narration if we record it real-time like this."

"I don't understand what you just said," I told him. "Is that ok?"

"Of course," he said, kissing me again. "It's fine. We just find that doing it this way makes it sound like you're really talking to the viewer. It makes it more real."

"Oh, I see." I said, not entirely sure I saw at all.

"They have this equipment in studio D too," he said. "It sounds like you just did something quick and simple. Was it a rough edit of something?"

"Yes," I nodded. "That's what Randy called it. He said it was a rough edit of our short film called The Dipstick. There were only a few lines for each of us to record. I also recorded some lines for my live show yesterday, but they didn't need to match a video. It was super-simple."

"Well there you go!" he said. "We don't always use the fancy gear for rough edits or live show voiceovers."

"What's that thing for?" I pointed to a cabinet that was as tall as a refrigerator with two large wheels that turned when he had played the video, and then they turned really fast when he was done playing it.

"That, my friend, is a rare Studer quarter-inch half-track 30 ips analog magnetic tape machine," he said dreamily, then he chuckled a bit. "That thing is my baby, and they are getting harder and harder to find, and finding parts for them can be nearly impossible." He patted my lap when he saw me snarl at him. He had a machine for a baby? "When you were in studio D, your microphone was connected to a computer. The sound of your voice was kept in the computer and then put on the film. In this studio, we record your voice and save it on a computer, just like in studio D, but we also record it onto this thin tape. I'll show you."

He stood up, carrying me with him. He walked to the machine and he showed me the tape. "But it's not sticky," I said. "How can it be tape?"

He tried to hide a chuckle, and that's not easy to do when the boy you are trying to hide it from is in your arms with his legs around your belly. "It's not sticky tape," he said. "It's called magnetic tape because the whole piece of tape is a long, thin magnet."

"Oh, I love playing with magnets," I said.

"Then you know what this tape does," he said. "When the tape moves over this thing, which we call a head, the head makes some of the tape more magnetic, and some of it less magnetic. That magnetic change comes from your voice, and it happens really fast. When we play the tape back, this other head right here can feel the magnetic changes in the tape, which came from your voice, and it turns them into electricity, which we can connect to speakers in order to hear you. We can connect that electricity to anything we like, even a computer."

"Wow!" I said, astonished that I understood him. "That's so cool! But why do you need this big machine when you can use a computer?"

"That's a little harder to explain," he said. "Recording machines, like this tape machine and our computers, all have their own sound. Nothing you record is ever an exact copy of the original sound. It always sounds just a little bit different. For most people's voices, these old tape machines make your voice sound the best. They have a real smoothness to them, though you might find it hard to notice until you get more experience."

He turned around and walked toward Randy and Norman. "Excuse me guys," he said. "I'd like to show Captain Hawkman the 24-track."

I giggled at what he'd called me. "I wanted my name to be Hawk Boy, but Mr. Eastman thought it sounded too Native American. I thought it made me sound like a superhero!"

"Ok, Hawk Boy," he said, "in here you are Hawk Boy, Defender of Earth, with superboy powers!" He held me flat in front of himself and carried me like I was flying until we got to the machine.

The machine looked a lot like the one he had just shown me, only the tape was not a quarter inch wide. "This is a two-inch, 24-track Otari multi-track recorder," he said. He set me on the ground so I could see this one, which was mounted onto a rack about as high as a desk.

"This machine works exactly like the other one," he said, "except this machine divides the tape magnet into 24 sections, side-by-side. That means this wide tape acts like twelve of those skinny tapes connected side-by-side, so we can record lots of different things at the same time. If we have 24 people talking on 24 different microphones, each of them will be recorded separately onto one of those skinny tape sections. These are great for music too. You can record a singer in one track, a guitar in another, a piano in another, and you can record one instrument at a time. You can turn each track on or off. Are you following all this, Hawk Boy, Defender of Earth?"

"Yes, I am!" I said, proud to answer truthfully. "It all looks and sounds complicated, but really it's not."

"Then, Hawk Boy, it's back to the control booth!" He lifted me onto his shoulder, and we pretended I was using my boy powers to fly back to where we were sitting. "Keep your body straight! Legs up! You're gonna crash with that sloppy flying! Straight! There ya go!" He sat back down in the chair and rolled my body around so I was sitting on his lap again.

"I love you Gary!" I said, kissing him.

"I love you too, Hawk Boy!" he said, tickling my belly.

***

"Gary, I think we've got things worked out," said Randy as he sat next to us at the computer. "I'm going to enter this new copy, and we should be good to go."

"All right Randy," said Gary. "We're set up with the U-87 first. I'll get Hawk Boy here situated in the live room."

He carried me again, though I didn't know why he kept carrying me, through a thick, wooden door that opened to the other side of the big window. There were a bunch of strange microphones on stands, with one positioned in the middle of the room. There was a video monitor next to the microphone. Gary set me down on a taped T on the floor, with a chair a few feet behind it. "I need you to stand here, facing the monitor while you record. Put your toes right up to the top part of the T, with one foot on each side of this other tape strip, ok, Hawk Boy, Defender of all that sounds and looks fantastic?"

"Ok," I giggled. He was such a nice man, and so much fun to be with. He moved the microphone to about a foot away from me. He lowered it a bit, and then moved a black mesh circle between my mouth and the microphone.

"Can you see the monitor ok?" he asked.

"Yes, just fine," I said.

"Ok, Hawk Boy," he said. "I'm going to be talking to you through these." He put a large pair of headphones over my ears and went to the control room, where I could see him through the window. "Can you hear me ok?" asked the voice in my headphones. How was I supposed to answer him in the other room? I looked at him and nodded. "You can talk to me with your normal voice," he said. "Just stand where you are, and I will hear you through the microphone. You will hear yourself too through your headphones."

"Ok," I said out loud. I hadn't worn headphones in studio D, and Randy was the one talking to me there. He was standing right next to me, so this was new to me.

"Good," he said. "I would like to do a test first. I am going to play part of the video, and I want you to read the words on the screen. Imagine you are reading the words to kids in a school room, loud enough so they will understand you in the back row, and breathe in nice and deep before you say anything. Have you got that, Hawk Boy?"

"Got it," I said. The video began, and the sound from the video started out quiet, but it grew louder. It began with a close-up of my face when Hanna was sucking my cock. I opened my eyes and followed the camera to my left and grinned just a bit.

"Hello, my name is Trevor Hawk," I said. "I'm the new boy at Frenetic Studios, and you'll be seeing a lot of me very soon. In fact, you'll be seeing all of me very soon." The scene cut to several one-second clips of me fucking and deep-throating and being fucked. It all looked very raunchy, and not at all like it felt when I recorded those scenes, but I looked very good. Then I realized I couldn't read fast enough to keep up with the video.

"Thanks, Hawk Boy," said Gary. "We've got a few things to work out in here, so have a seat, have a drink of water, chillax, but leave your headphones on, ok?"

"Ok," I said.

I sat down, and Randy came into the room a few seconds later with my water bottle. "You forgot this," he said, handing it to me. I took a sip. He stood in front of me, next to the microphone. That meant I could hear him without taking the headphones off, like Gary said.

"This is how we're going to do this session. It's going to be different from yesterday. You'll do one quick take, only one line, then there might be some discussion, some adjustments, switching microphones, and even arguing about the script. We're already making a change. You are no longer the new boy at Frenetic since Hiro and Kenji signed yesterday, so now you are 'new to the Frenetic family.' I told you, people can be a bit fussy about the details at this stage." I think I looked worried again. He said, "Remember, other people get paid to worry. Just be yourself and speak into the microphone if you need to ask for anything. Speak your lines clearly, but talk like you would to a friend. Maybe you could imagine you're on the phone with Sebastian."

This was too much to remember all at once! Now I really was worrying. "But I can't read this fast enough," I told Randy. "What am I going to do if I can't keep up?"

"I will get you a copy of the script as it is right now so you can read and remember one line at a time before we record it, just like we did yesterday," he said with a reassuring tone.

"Remember, when you've memorized a line, don't say it too fast. Go at the same speed you see in the monitor, ok? Also keep in mind that we will be making small changes to the script throughout the session, and I will bring you the changes as we make them." I nodded, feeling relieved.

"Hawk, everyone who hears these recordings will be a loving friend. You know the people at Frenetic love you, and you will be loved by fans all over the world, and I know already that you love them. You are always among friends, no matter what you do at Frenetic." I stood up and hugged him, feeling very relieved. What he said when I first met him was very true – he really did understand boys.

***

"Hi, Trevor," said another voice as Randy went back to the control room. "This is Norman. Can you hear me ok?"

"Yes Sir," I said.

"No, no, just Norman is fine. I wanted to let you know that we will be doing several takes of each line. I will probably talk to you if I want you to do something differently, maybe saying something slightly differently. When I do that, it doesn't mean you've done anything wrong, ok? It just means I want to try it a different way. Your sound check sounded wonderful. Remember what Gary said. Breathe deeply before each line. Oh, Randy is here too, and he might also have suggestions and information for you. Remember, we're all working for you. We're all here to make you look and sound sexy and fantastic!"

"Hi Hawk," said Randy. "We're going to start now. Do you need anything at all before we begin?"

"No thanks, I think I'm fine."

"You're more than fine, kid," said Norman. "You're sensational!"

***

We began recording. When I memorized one line at a time and then spoke the line with the video, it worked really well. I did my best, but Norman told me a few times I needed to put live energy into it. He said sometimes it sounded like I was making an announcement rather than saying these things to my new friends. He told me to project my voice, which sounded like he wanted me to be louder. He said that wasn't it, but when I projected like he wanted me to, I was louder.

One time when Norman was talking to me, I heard Randy saying, "We need to try the 319. I only work with kids, and the 319 nearly always sounds better with them. The U-87 is coming across too thin and dark. We are not using digital emulators! He's a kid, not Frank Sinatra!" Norman's microphone cut off, and I wondered if Frank Sinatra was one of the adult actors. I could see them speaking behind the window. Randy looked frustrated, but after a minute, Norman waved Gary into the room with me.

"Hawk Boy! How ya doing, partner?" he said happily. "We're just going to try a different microphone." He took the silver U-87 away and brought a stand with a black microphone on it. He asked me to stand on the T again, and he brought this one in closer to my mouth.

"Are they arguing?" I asked.

Gary chuckled and said, "Yeah, and they're doing it very well. There's not a thing wrong with arguing if you know how to do it with respect. Look, Hawk Boy, these guys are serious, world-class professionals, both of them, and they didn't get where they are by not handling disagreements well. In all art, everyone has an opinion, and all opinions are valid. Let them worry about the best way to do this, and when it's your turn to read the lines, just do it the best you can. That's how we all work together. Ok partner?"

"Ok, Gary." He kissed me before stepping back into the control booth. If this was how it was when only two people disagreed about something in my promo film, I was dreading the screening, where dozens of people would surely be disagreeing and arguing.

"Ok Trevor," said Norman, "we're going to take it from the top again and see how this new microphone sounds."

"Hello, my name is Trevor Hawk. I'm new to the Frenetic family, and you'll be seeing a lot of me very soon. In fact, you'll be seeing all of me very soon." It went on like this, on and on. At some point I took my knickers and my vest off and stood there naked, stroking my hard cock as I read my lines. Norman wanted sexual energy, so I thought that might help.

It's amazing how much of a turn-on it was to know whatever I was doing was going to make somebody cum somewhere in the world. Even after being deep-throated for the first time, I managed to cum twice during this recording session. I knew that my voiceover recordings would be part of the good feeling people got from my child porn videos. It made me feel sort of powerful, but in a good way. I had the power to make people feel good. That was the most amazing feeling in the world. Before I met Randy, it seemed people were annoyed by me being around them, or something like that. For whatever reason, they didn't want me near them. No matter what I did, I couldn't make them happy. Suddenly everything was upside down, but I hadn't changed at all. Had I? I sure didn't think so.

***

Randy was right about how fussy everybody was. Eventually we settled into a way of moving through everything that Randy and Norman were both happy with. Norman seemed surprised at how much he liked the second microphone after he had called it "cheap Russian crap."

We were getting near the end of things when Randy came into the room with me. "Hawk," he said, "I'm going to leave you here with Gary and Norman for about fifteen minutes. It's ten o'clock now, so I'll be back at about ten-fifteen. I'm going to give Inspector MacAdams my statement. I wanted to get that out of the way so we could both have a little extra time after you're done." I nodded. Things had been going well, and we were nearly done anyway. "I love you, Hawk," he said with a kiss, "and Norman is absolutely wild about you. He doesn't show it, but he's really very impressed with your voiceover skills. Well, it's more how quickly you learn how to follow his instructions. That could lead to even more work opportunities for you, but we'll talk later. I'll see you in fifteen minutes."

"I love you Randy!" I said as we kissed again.

***

True to his word, at precisely 10:15, Randy was back in the control room, but so was I, fully dressed again in my bikini knickers and tiny vest. We had already finished, and Gary was playing back my recordings with the video. I couldn't believe that was my voice! It sounded like something from a television announcer, maybe one who was eight, almost nine, but a professional announcer. Randy and Norman shook hands and said how great it was working with each other again and that they should do lunch. Gary got handshakes from the others as well, but I made all of them pick me up and kiss me. Well, I asked them to, and they did. I hoped I would see a lot more of Gary.

"The moment had almost arrived when I would have to tell what happened, but Randy was holding me, and he loved me. He would keep me safe. He would tell them I didn't want to make that man go to jail. He caressed me in different places, constantly moving his hands around, and I had a quick giggle as I looked into his eyes, thinking about what a perv he could be, using any excuse to touch my bare thighs! He winked at me. He knew what I was thinking, and I think he knew I needed something to giggle about just then."

Chapter 55
Burden

Randy and I left the office building and walked toward the security headquarters building, where Inspector MacAdams would be meeting me. "Really Hawk," he said, "you'll like her. She works with kids all the time, and she's seen everything. She won't waste time. She just wants you to tell her what happened and that's all. She will record the conversation as well. Oh, and she wants you to call her Judith." He put his arm around me. He knew I was scared.

"Can I sit on your lap while we're in there?" I asked.

"Of course, Hawk," he said. "Everyone wants you to be comfortable. This will be a breeze after that recording session."

"I know, it's just, it's…" I turned around and hugged Randy's leg, suddenly crying.

I don't cry very much at all because I'm older now, but I did a lot of crying during my first week at Frenetic. I don't want you to get the wrong impression though. It was the happiest week of my life. All of my emotions were exploding, all the the good ones too, and I guess it didn't take much to get me crying then. I was scared of this meeting with the detective – very scared. Sometimes I think it's a wonder I didn't pee myself.

Randy picked me up and said, "Shh, shh, it's ok sweetie. Tell me what's wrong."

"I can't do it!" I said. "I can't!"

He sat down on a bench outside the security headquarters and put me on his lap so we could talk. "Can you tell me why, Hawk?"

"That man… If I say the wrong thing, he'll go to jail for a long time, and his family will miss him."

"Oh Honey-Hawk, that's too much responsibility," he said. "You are only responsible for telling the truth. You can only say what happened. I already told the inspector what I saw, and Boris will too this afternoon, so it's not just you. Raoul will also tell her what happened. The CCTV cameras all saw it. What happened is what happened, and none of us can change that. Do you understand that much?" I nodded. "Now think carefully about this. Who decided that he would touch you?"

"He did," I said softly.

"Did you have some way of choosing what he did?"

"I guess not," I said.

"Hawk, whether he goes to jail is not your decision. He decided to violate your body, and Her Majesty's criminal court will decide what will happen next, not you. Like you said, he made the choice, not you. You won't be sending him anywhere. He made that choice when he violated your control over your own precious body." I sobbed more when he said that, but I didn't know why.

"I know it's hard to understand why that is such a serious crime, but believe me, Buford certainly understood the seriousness of what he did, and he made his decision anyway. That's what matters. You will be one voice among many who tells the truth about what happened. You have not decided that he should go to prison. You don't ever get to make that decision. Only the court can decide that. If you're worried about whether his family will miss him, he has been divorced six times, he has no children, and most of his relatives have disowned him anyway."

"Randy?"

"Yes, Hawk?"

"I liked it when you called me Honey-Hawk just now," I said. "It made me feel special, like you really love me, but call me Hawk, too, please. Maybe call me Honey-Hawk when I'm sad or frightened?"

"Honey-Hawk, I do love you, and you are special."

"I'm ready to talk with the Inspector now."

***

Randy carried me into the security headquarters building to an office where we met Markus. Randy sat in a chair, one of three cushioned chairs that were positioned around a low round table with coffee mugs on it. He cradled me in his lap the whole time. Just as Markus sat down in another chair, a man and a woman came into the office. Markus stood right back up, but not Randy.

"Judith!" said Randy in greeting. "I'm sorry I can't stand just now. I have a much more important priority, as you see."

"Hello Trevor," she said, nodding. "My name is Judith. I think Randy and Markus have told you why we're here. You certainly look safe with those strong arms around you." I nodded. "Well that's good. If any nasty monster tries to attack you, you'll be well-protected."

I tried to look at her because it was only polite, but I couldn't. She looked strong and serious. She had a pointed nose and short gray hair that made her look somehow dangerous to me, and I was already frightened. So, I looked down at her ID badge.

It surprised me that she was also wearing a Frenetic ID badge, just like all the KCU people and the Frenetic employees wore. It had a picture of a police badge on one side and her name under the Frenetic logo on the other side, with her picture in the middle. Her badge said she was a visitor. That made no sense to me. She was a police detective from Scotland Yard, not a visitor. The bottom part of her ID badge said "Police Officer" in large letters, right where Maria's badge had said "Child Safety," and Nurse Blaine's had said "RN." She also had a real police badge on her lapel. Surely that must have shown everyone she was no visitor. Otherwise, I guess she was dressed normally.

She said something quietly to her assistant. Then she turned to me and said, "I just started recording our conversation, and I need to say a few things for the record, ok Trevor?"

"Honey-Hawk," I said, looking at Randy.

"What's that, Trevor?" she asked.

"I'm Honey-Hawk now," I said, still looking at Randy. "Will you please call me Honey-Hawk? It makes me less afraid."

Markus said something quietly to her that I didn't understand.

"I think that's reasonable, Honey-Hawk," she said. "Nobody wants you to be frightened, and we all know this is very difficult for you."

"Thanks," I said, still looking at Randy. He never took his eyes off of me.

"Ok," she continued. "I need to say a few boring things for the record. Please be patient while I'm speaking. Then I have to ask you a question about your name, ok Honey-Hawk?" I nodded.

"This is Markus Kramer, attorney for the witness," said Markus. "For the record, the witness has nodded to indicate agreement with Inspector Macadams." That seemed a rather strange thing to say, but he was the expert.

Then Judith began speaking with a rather stiff and boring voice. "This is Detective Inspector Judith MacAdams of the Sexual Offences, Exploitation and Child Abuse unit of the Specialist Crime and Operations Directorate, Metropolitan Police Service, in the county of Greater London. The time is 10:33 AM, Thursday, nineteen July, twenty eighteen. This recording concerns case number one seven six stroke zero seven two one one nine, investigation of alleged sexual assault committed on eighteen July, twenty eighteen on the premises of the Frenetic Film Corporation within the county of Greater London. Present with me in the room are Detective Sergeant Murray Hill, who is taking notes of this conversation, Attorney for the witness Mr. Markus Kramer, legal guardian for the witness Mr. Randall Christianson, and the witness himself, who is a minor child. We will address the witness's identity in a moment."

She paused and took a deep breath. Then she turned to me with a smile and said, "That's all the official talk finished. Now, Honey-Hawk, just this one time, would you please say your real name out loud, including your full surname that you used before you started working here? It's important for our record that you give us your real name just this one time please."

I looked at Randy, and he smiled, giving me a gentle squeeze. "My name is Trevor Martin Hawkinson, and I'm eight, almost nine," I said to Randy, not looking away from his comforting face.

"And for the record," she said, "I will be calling you Honey-Hawk while we talk this morning, because you have told me it makes you feel less frightened. When I say the name Honey-Hawk, that means I am talking to you, Trevor Martin Hawkinson."

It wasn't a question, but I answered, "I'm Honey-Hawk."

She looked in my direction as I continued to stare into Randy's eyes and said, "Yes, we are all clear now, Honey-Hawk, and thank you very much. I just needed to have that on our recording to make things official. I think the best thing to do is to get right into this." Then she looked down at her notes, smiled kindly at me again, which I barely saw off to the side as I continued to look at Randy. Then she said, "If you need to stop for a moment, that's ok. If you make a mistake or say something that isn't correct, or maybe it isn't quite what you meant to say, that's perfectly ok, but it's very important that you to tell us as soon as you can what the mistake was, and we'll make sure it's corrected, ok?"

"Ok," I said to Randy. I felt myself trembling. The moment had almost arrived when I would have to tell what happened, but Randy was holding me, and he loved me. He would keep me safe. He would tell them I didn't want to make that man go to jail. He caressed me in different places, constantly moving his hands around, and I had a quick giggle as I looked into his eyes, thinking about what a perv he could be, using any excuse to touch my bare thighs! He winked at me. He knew what I was thinking, and I think he knew I needed something to giggle about just then.

"Now Honey-Hawk," said Judith, "yesterday you did a live sex performance with Mr. Christianson here, and with another boy who uses the working name Boris Boomboy. Would you please tell us what happened after your performance, when you were meeting members of the audience? In fact, since you are so safe with Mr. Christianson, why don't you tell him what happened?"

"But he already knows," I said, turning to her. "I think I should tell you instead, because you're the detective who needs to know, right?"

"Yes," she said with a kind smile, "Yes, that's right." I was still scared, but she no longer looked very frightening. She was smiling, and Randy had just made me giggle. Somehow that made me feel brave, just for the moment.

"Well, Mr. Eastman told the people in the audience that they could meet us if they wanted to, but they should tip us generously. Raoul and the other security people had the people form into a queue. They came up to me and put lots of tip money on the stage next to me, and I would give them a thank-you kiss or something. Sometimes they wanted an autograph. One man asked me to autograph his willy! Another man wanted me to autograph his two sons' bodies. Some of them wanted to give my penis a tug. That's just a friendly way that we say hello here, but they all had to ask me first, and I can always say no if I don't want someone to do that," I said, as if teaching one of the new boys at the studio how we did things. "But the person you want to know about is Mr. Buford, I guess." I paused, waiting for her to agree, but she didn't.

"Please continue when you feel ready," she said, "ok, Honey-Hawk?"

"Ok, I'm ready," I said. "Mr. Buford was in the queue to see me. When he got to the front, he put down a big tip, but it turned out to be a really small tip with a bunch of blank paper between a few real notes. He smelled horrible, like nasty cigars and whiskey. He said I was the prettiest thing he'd ever seen, something like that. I don't remember his words very well, but he called me pretty, and I really like it when people call me pretty, but he didn't mean it like other people mean it. It felt… wrong somehow, like he didn't mean pretty, but maybe something else; I'm not sure what though. It was a little uncomfortable. While he was talking, he had his hands on my thighs, and he moved them up until he had his hands around my cock…" I lurched with startle at what I'd said. "Oh! I'm sorry! I meant around my penis."

"Honey-Hawk," said Judith, with her kind smile, "please use your own words. If he grabbed your cock, then he grabbed your cock. I need you to say what happened using your own words, not the words you think will please me or anyone else." She turned to the man next to her who had been typing everything into his laptop and said, "until he had his hands around my cock." He stopped typing and nodded. "Please continue when you are ready, Honey-Hawk. You said he had his hands on your thighs, and he moved them up until he had his hands around your cock."

"Yes, Judith, he had his hands around my cock. We always say cock here." She smiled gently and nodded. "So, as soon as he had his hands on my cock, Raoul, my security person, pulled Mr. Buford's hands away from my cock and made him leave. I guess someone called the police then too. That's really all there is."

"Thank you Honey-Hawk," she said with another kind smile. "We're almost done already! I just need to ask a few more questions, and they are all very easy. First, you said Mr. Eastman told people in the audience they could meet you. Was that Mr. Philip Eastman, the executive producer here at Frenetic Children's Division?"

"Yes, that's him," I said.

"Ok, did everybody from the audience who touched you anywhere on your body first ask for your permission?"

"Yes, everybody asked. They all seemed to know they had to ask, except Mr. Buford. He didn't ask anything. He just smelled bad and licked his lips."

"Thank you," she said. "When you say Mr. Buford, do you mean Beauregard Buford, the former American distributor for Frenetic Films?"

"Yes, of course. He's the one we're talking about."

"Thank you, Honey-Hawk. When you say Raoul, do you mean Raoul Rodriguez, a security officer who works for Frenetic Studios?"

"Yes Ma'am," I said. "He was my very own personal security guard for the live show. I've never had my own security guard before! He's a very nice man, and he kept track of all my tip money too. He kept it in his jacket so no one could steal it."

"He sounds like a good man to have with you during a performance like this," she said.

"Oh yes, Judith," I said. "He is a really good person, and Randy, my agent, picked him out specially for me. I hope I get to have him again this afternoon when I'm doing another live show." Randy smiled at me but didn't say anything.

"Thank you Honey-Hawk," she said. "It might sound silly, and it's perfectly ok to laugh if you like, but I need to ask you this for legal reasons that Mr. Kramer will understand."

"Yes," said Markus, "we can talk about these questions when we've finished if you like."

Judith continued, "When you say Randy, do you mean Randall Christianson, your agent and legal guardian, the adult actor at your live performance, and the man who is holding you in his lap right now?"

I did giggle. "Yes Ma'am, that is a silly thing to ask. Of course I mean him!" I giggled a little more. "He's the only Randy I know, and I love him a lot!" I reached my head up toward Randy's, and he leaned down a bit to meet me for a kiss.

"Thank you, Honey-Hawk," she said with a bright smile. "Your kiss tells me that you do love him very much. I'm glad to see you smiling now. You weren't smiling when we began, and I can certainly understand why not. I hope you have been surprised at how easy this has all been."

I nodded with a smile and said, "It's been super easy, Judith. You're so nice, even though Randy says you come from Scotland Yard."

"Oh dear, Honey-Hawk! I hope you don't hold that against me!" she said with a broad smile. Randy and Markus chuckled. "We are almost done now. Here is my last question for you, Honey-Hawk," she said. "Did Mr. Buford ever ask for your permission to put his hands on your thighs before touching you there?"

"No, not at all. He never asked permission for anything. Raoul thought he was drunk."

"Well, I will be speaking with Mr. Rodriguez about that," she said. "How about that, Mr. Honey-Hawk! We are all done with the questions and the talking, unless there is something important you think I should know, or something else that might help us to understand the truth about what happened?"

"I don't think so, Judith," I said. "I said what happened, and it was all the truth, so you can know that's what happened, and you get to decide what to do now."

Judith looked at me sweetly, almost the way a grandmother would look at a grandchild she was very proud of. "Yes," she said, "your job here is finished by telling us the true story, and other people will decide what to do with it." Then she turned from me and said, "This ends the recording. The time now is 10:48 AM." She waved to her assistant, who then pressed a button, which I guess turned off the recorder.

"Sergeant Hill is printing a copy of everything you said about what happened yesterday, ah here it is now." She handed the paper to Markus. "Honey-Hawk, all that's left is for you to read this with your solicitor, Mr. Kramer. Mr. Christianson has the right to look it over as well if he wishes. If everything is correct, I'll ask you and Mr. Kramer to sign it, and we'll be done. This kind of statement is not an exact quote of everything you've said. It just has to be true and complete, and if there are words that are different from what you said, they have to mean the same thing. Mr. Kramer can explain more if you like. If you find any mistakes, or if you read anything that isn't quite what you meant to say, or if you think there is something missing, show it to Mr. Kramer, and we'll make the necessary corrections right here and print a new copy."

After Markus read the paper, he handed it to me and let me read it together with Randy. "Did you understand what Judith meant about this not being exactly what you said, but that it has to have the same meaning as what you said, and it has to be true?" Markus asked me.

"Yes, I understand that," I said. "I don't know why they do it like that though."

"They know what things are important in a statement like this. Sometimes professional people like Inspector Judith can find better words that say things more clearly to the court than the words a young boy might have used, even though you were very clear with your own words, and Judith told you that it was very important to use your own words while talking. This piece of paper is actually your statement. The things you said on the recording were your way of telling Inspector Judith what needed to be written in your statement, and they are the record that shows how the statement was written." I was glad he was the solicitor.

I was almost nine, but some of the words on the paper were difficult to read, and I didn't understand some of them. Markus didn't tell me what those words meant, which was frustrating. He just circled them, and he suggested other ways of saying the same thing in a way that I could understand. (I noticed that the word "cock" was used in the statement, just how I'd used it.) Judith's assistant printed another copy with the changes that Markus suggested, and Randy and I continued reading.

I noticed that the first time I said "Randy" and "Mr. Buford," the paper had "Randall Christianson, my professional agent, legal guardian, and fellow actor, whom I call Randy," and "Beauregard Buford, former American distributor for Frenetic Films, whom I call Mr. Buford" written instead. Markus said that was ok because I had told Judith at the end that those were the people I meant when I said "Randy" and "Mr. Buford." None of Judith's questions were written in the statement either. It was all written as if I were telling the story myself, with no one asking me anything. Markus told me the statement had to reflect what I had said, and only what I had said, not what Judith had to say. That's why her questions weren't there.

"As long as everything on that paper is true and complete, and as long as you understand every word of it, then it's ok," Markus said. When I finished reading it, I looked at him and swallowed. My mouth was suddenly dry. "How does it look, Trevor?"

"It's all the truth." Suddenly I couldn't breathe properly. I looked at Randy, who nodded, and I said, "All the stuff I said is in here and it's all the tru…"

I suddenly exploded into tears again. I wasn't expecting it, and I wasn't sure why, but I buried my face in Randy's chest and bawled. All I had left to do was to sign it, but suddenly I was overwhelmed by the burden of that responsibility. Everybody wanted him to go to prison but me. Even Boris had said he should "go for hell." They wanted him to go to prison, but I didn't, yet I was the one who had to sign the paper that they needed to send him there, the piece of paper I was holding in my hand. One little piece of paper would lock him in prison, but only if I signed it. Me.

Randy rocked me gently in his arms and started singing softly to me. It was a song about how a lot of things turn bad out there, how it's a wild world, and how he'll always remember me like a child. It was really a pretty song, and I'd never heard it before, but he was saying that even when I grow up he would look after me if he could, but whether he likes it or not, I would have to grow up someday and have my own life. But at that moment, I was still a little boy, and he was looking after me.

"Everybody here knows why this is such a struggle for you, Honey Hawk," said Randy. "It's ok to take some time to be sure you're doing the right thing."

"Do I have to sign this, Judith?" I asked between sniffles.

"No, Honey Hawk, you do not have to sign it. You don't even have to talk to me about this," she replied. "I think what you really need to ask is whether you should sign it, and that's a question that only Mr. Kramer and Mr. Christianson here can help you with today. I can't give you that kind of advice."

I looked at Markus, and then at Randy. I knew the answer. I knew what I had to do, and what I should do, but I needed one more cry before doing it. I wrapped my arms around Randy's neck and hugged him tightly while I cried out the last of my tears. Then I looked him in the eyes, kissed him sloppily, and held my hand out to Markus so he could hand me a pen.

He gave me a pen, and Randy sat me upright on his lap. I put the statement on the table and signed the paper that would put a man in prison for fifteen years for grabbing my cock.

"Honey Hawk," said Judith, "you have done some very painful soul-searching. Doing what you should do is not always easy. You showed a lot of courage just now, and you made very sure you did it for all the right reasons. I want to thank you for simply telling the truth, even when it was so terribly difficult. I also want you to know that I am very proud of you, and that you have acted like a good and responsible subject of Her Majesty's United Kingdom. I am sure Mr. Christianson and Mr. Kramer will stay close to you to support your decision. I know they are both fiercely proud of you as well."

Those were really nice words, but I had just made her job easier. Of course she would be glad I did it. Randy was right – Buford was the one who made me have to go through this, and I was beginning to feel properly angry.

***

"How do you feel now, Honey-Hawk?" asked Randy as we walked out of the security building.

"I can be Hawk again. Thanks for helping me feel better."

"I love you Hawk, and I am very, very proud of you. You were so frightened of what you had to do, but you did it anyway. Some people say that's what courage is – feeling the fear and doing it anyway. Yes, I am very proud."

"You're sure?" I asked. "You're positive that soon I will understand why it's good that I just did something that made sure he had to go to prison?"

"I am sure, Hawk," he said. "I can't say how soon, and I can't prove it to you. I can only tell you I am sure."

"Ok," I said. "I trust you. You've earned my trust. I decided that after I made you cry in the pub by Gold Boys of Chelsea. You loved me anyway, and you didn't run away when I hurt your feelings. Everything in my life is better since you've been looking after me. Everything! Now I have to trust you about this too, even though it's difficult."

For a moment, I thought I'd made him cry again. Then he picked me up, kissed me, and hugged me with so much love I thought I might cry again. He sat me on his shoulders and carried me back to the dormitory building, holding me in place by my bare thighs, of course. It made me happy when he touched my bare legs like that because I knew how happy it made him feel, even when we weren't having sex. I squeezed my thighs together against his cheeks because I knew he would love it. Maybe I was saying thank you. He had given me so much, and this was one little thing I could give him, and it made him smile. He kissed me goodbye as he walked back to the office building and I went up to room 46 to meet Yvgenia for shopping.

It's strange, but after going through something so difficult and crying a lot, I nearly always feel super-cheerful when it's all over, even silly. It would be several months before I really understood what was so wrong about what Mr. Buford had done, but at that exact moment, I didn't need to know. I felt sexy again, and I was going shopping with a new friend!

Shlomo was the only boy I'd ever known who always smiled during sex, even when he came. For him, sex was the purest form of happiness, and he was even happier when he could share his happiness, or please his master. I was glad for all that. I loved Yvgenia, but I preferred to fuck her with Shlomo's cock instead of mine. For now, that made her happy too.

Chapter 56
Almost Heaven

The sight that greeted me in room 46 was the last I expected to see. I can't imagine why though. Meeting with the detective seemed to have taken me out of it for a while, and I forgot where I lived and who I lived with. Yvgenia and Shlomo were still naked, but Yvgenia was lying on her back, holding Shlomo's collar, while he fucked her hard. That made me smile because it seemed Yvgenia was finally starting to enjoy things again, and because my boy was serving her so well. God he looked cute!

I sat on the bed with them and caressed Shlomo's busy little ass. It felt hard as he flexed his fuck muscles. Normally it felt soft and squishy. I licked my index finger until it was all wet, and I stuck it in his ass, firmly and steadily. He threw his head back and yelped. I got a stiffy again. I would have fucked his cute, tiny little ass right then, only I had already cum three times that day, and it wasn't even time for lunch. I didn't want to have problems during the live performance either, so I resisted temptation. Instead, I firmly and steadily inserted my middle finger into his little hole as well. He arched his back and made a barking sound as I massaged him from the inside. I could feel how tightly he was clenching my fingers, and I imagined how it would feel to be using my cock instead. It seemed no wonder he was so popular.

I made an impulsive decision. I would just fuck him for a little while and not cum. I removed my vest and panties (and my fingers from his ass) and put my cock in his face so he could suck it, but Yvgenia shoved his head away and gulped it down herself. I didn't want her to get the wrong idea, so I pulled out once I knew I was wet enough to slide into Shlomo's ass. She had been sucking so hard it was difficult to pull out. She let out a brief moan of disappointment, but as I slid into Shlomo's ass, something seemed to reach deeper inside her. She howled and clenched Shlomo and me tightly with her legs.

I leaned in and kissed Yvgenia. She looked into my eyes after the kiss with a certain desperation it seemed. Then she let out a scream, still staring at me. She barked with each thrust my boy put into her, and with each thrust I put into my boy. She dug her fingers into his neck and clenched our bodies tighter with her legs. He kept going, faster and faster, and I did my best to match his pace. Soon I realized he was trying to match my pace. After all, I was the Master. Apparently, that made it feel even more intense for Yvgenia. It was obvious that all she wanted was for me to fuck her, and by directing my boy to fuck her while I was fucking him, it seemed close enough to get Yvgenia shrieking while gazing into my eyes. She looked at me, I looked at my sweet little boy, and he looked at her. I touched her hand and she crushed mine in her grip and screamed again. Then I heard a little puppy bark and felt a sudden, awesome, clenching on my cock. Shlomo pressed his cock deep inside Yvgenia and held it there, then took four more hard thrusts, making Yvgenia shriek one last time, followed by Shlomo's last grunt.

I didn't want to stop yet. So what if I had a live show. I'd be fine. I knew I could cum at least 10 times in a day. I'd done it a few times in the park by Mum's flat. Shlomo had laid his head on Yvgenia's chest when I began thrusting. He arched his back again and threw his head back until it pressed against my chest. Yvgenia screamed when he did this. I noticed a few people had gathered at the open door to our room to watch. I learned that was normal in the children's dorm building.

I think Shlomo was still hard, because every time I thrust into him, Yvgenia writhed and howled. Shlomo turned his head back toward me and said, "Master, I love you!" It sounded as if he was crying the words. I felt so much love for that little boy. I reached my arm around his chest and sucked on his neck until I felt an eruption of bliss.

I don't know how long we remained in that position, but it felt like forever. Whenever one of us twitched, the other two followed.

Soon Shlomo and I rolled off, with my cock still inside his little ass. I'd learned long ago that when I cum several times close together, I usually stay hard after. Shlomo wasn't complaining, and neither was I.

Yvgenia grabbed me around the neck and kissed me madly. When she'd had enough, she said, "If you're ever unsure about being gay, tell me!"

I kissed her gently and said, "You will be the first to know, but don't be afraid to jump on me just because you're a girl. My cock isn't as big as Shlomo's," which I jerked as I said this, "but you can play with it if you like, and you can use my boy anytime too. I think he likes you." Shlomo looked at Yvgenia and nodded with a broad smile.

"That's odd, really," said Yvgenia, "because he almost never does scenes with girls or plays with them at all."

"Master loves you," said Shlomo, "so I love you too, and I want to make you feel good. That makes Master feel good, and it makes me feel good when Master feels good. Other girls don't make Master feel good like that."

Yvgenia looked at me and said, "What a curious explanation. As long as everyone's happy, I guess that's what matters."

I jerked Shlomo's cock again, only to keep it from getting soft. I gave him a few more thrusts in his ass while we all enjoyed the occasional aftershocks from our orgasms. "Master loves you too, my sweet boy," I said to Shlomo.

He turned his head back to look into my eyes and gave me the prettiest smile, then looked down and said, "Thank you, Master, I love you too." He really looked lovely in the afterglow of good sex.

***

Soon we decided it was time to go shopping, but I had something I wanted to try first. After asking Yvgenia if it was ok, I told Shlomo to put his cock back into Yvgenia's pussy until I came back with my new cell phone. Sebastian had shown me how to take videos with it, remembering to hold the camera sideways. I started recording the video as I walked up to Yvgenia's bed. I orbited both of them, which means I walked around them while keeping the camera pointed at them, and then I moved in to get a tight shot of Yvgenia's pussy just as Shlomo pulled his monstrous, almost grotesque cock slowly out of it. Shlomo rolled over and lay next to her as I backed up for a wide shot. They kissed and waved, and that was how I recorded my first child porn video.

***

"To the shower, boy," I said. "Clean yourself thoroughly, and we will join you in a minute so you can clean us."

"Yes Master."

Yvgenia and I cuddled for a minute or so before going to the shower. This time we all crammed into one shower stall, which wasn't difficult given how tiny Shlomo is, and the fact that he was on his knees most of the time cleaning us. Besides, the shower stalls weren't proper stalls. They had no walls or curtains separating them. They were community showers, meant for sharing.

When we dried off, they each took a pair of sandals from the dispenser, and Yvgenia said she was ready. Shlomo nodded in agreement. Both of them always went everywhere naked. I put on a clean pair of long white socks and dressed again in my white knickers and vest with fringes. I wanted to buy accessories for that outfit, so I thought it would be best to wear it to the store. It felt odd being the only one wearing clothing.

I wanted to bring my cell phone and my Visa, but I didn't have pockets or anything to put them in. "You need a purse," said Yvgenia. "I bet they have one of those at Almost Heaven as well. In fact, I saw one there that would be perfect! It's white leather, and it has those fringes you like. You should bring your makeup too, so you can put it in your purse. You should always have your makeup with you. That's really what a purse is for."

I took her advice and grabbed my mascara, eyeliner, and red cute-boy lipstick. I made Shlomo carry the makeup. I held onto my Visa and cell phone. "Aren't you going to buy anything?" I asked her.

"I dunno," she said.

"Won't you need money or a card or something?"

"I set up an account with the studio," she said. "You can do that you know. I'll show you how at the store; it's super simple. That way you can go anywhere in the studio where something costs money, and you can buy it without a card or anything. They just take the money from your account."

"I'd like that," I said. I leashed my boy and we walked to the store.

***

"If you're a good boy and stay quiet, you can come inside too," I said to Shlomo just outside the entrance to Almost Heaven. There were hitching posts in front of the store just like the ones in front of the main studio building for people to tie their slaves down while shopping. There was naked a man with a black hood over his head handcuffed to one of the posts.

"Yes Master," he said clearly, with another cheerful smile.

The three of us walked in. The store was deceptively large inside. The public was not allowed in, only Frenetic employees, so there wasn't a big sign out front, and they didn't try to make it look very noticeable. My jaw dropped at all the pretty and sexy things. They also had regular everyday clothes for wearing off the lot, if we didn't want to look sexy. I didn't think I'd ever wear those kinds of clothes again. The children's department was on the ground floor, women's clothing was upstairs, and men's clothes and BDSM gear for men, women, and children was in the basement.

Yvgenia took me to where the purse was. It was small, made of leather, and it had a one-inch strap with a buckle to adjust the length. White fringes hung from the bottom and sides and from the bottom of the flap. It had gorgeous white beadwork in the middle of the flap. I smiled at Yvgenia. I could see Shlomo's eyes open wide with a huge smile on his face. I think he was happy for his master. "Why don't I buy this first so I have a place to put my things, and then I'll set up my account."

"Ok," said Yvgenia. "You can do all that at the counter in the corner."

We walked to the corner, and I told Shlomo to heel. He knelt back on his feet and hugged my leg like a good boy. The purse was £450, but I learned that the same purse at Gold Boys of Chelsea would cost twice that. The store did not operate for profit, and the studio subsidized everything we bought to encourage us to get top quality goods. I handed the assistant my Visa card and told her I wanted to set up an account. She asked me how much I would like to put into the account. I just said the first number that came to my head, £5,000. She had me sign something, and it was done. Yvgenia was right; it was all very easy.

I put my cell phone and Visa card in my new purse, as well as the makeup I had given Shlomo to carry, and asked the assistant if she knew whether they had long boots that would match my outfit. She called someone from the children's footwear and legwear department. A very young-looking woman with pretty eyes came to greet us. She introduced herself to us as Claudia before leading us to her department.

"Yes," she said, "I see what you mean. I think we have just the thing," and she did! They went up as high as my tube socks. They closed with a zipper on the inside, just like my purple boots with gold and black paisley. They had fringes all around the top and down the back. The leather was plain, with no ornaments or hardware.

They had my size information from the wardrobe department in their computer, so it was an easy matter to find my size. I took off my shoes and slid my feet into the boots. Claudia did up the zips for me. I looked in the three-way mirror, and I loved it. I decided to pull my socks down a bit so they didn't show over the top of the boots.

"If I might make a suggestion, Mr. Hawk," said Claudia, "You will find many white leather accessories in our BDSM department in the basement level. You can coordinate your boy's cuffs, collar, and leash so he matches your outfit if you like."

"Oh how fun!" said Yvgenia. "You could get him all the colors you normally wear."

I decided I needed more shoes. The only Mary Janes I had were pink. So I got them in red, white, and black as well. Claudia charged them to my account and said they would be delivered to my room, along with the shoes I had worn coming in. (I'd decided to wear my new boots.) I have always liked Mary Janes. They're the ones with a thin strap and buckle, and no tongue down the middle. Boys used to wear them all the time in Britain, even the really hard boys. People say they're girls' shoes now, and maybe that's why I liked them. I still liked the idea of being pretty as well as being sexy.

We went to the BDSM department next, children's section. They had all the things Shlomo had, and all the things I had received from Diane (the wardrobe woman who fancied me) as gifts. I bought wrist and ankle cuffs, leashes, and collars for Shlomo in white, pink, and yellow. The white gear had gold plated buckles, clasps, and grommets. I removed his black collar and cuffs and put the white ones on him, including the white leash. I asked for an all white, small boys' size ball gag. I put it on him, which gave Shlomo a huge stiffie. That made the BDSM children's assistant chuckle.

"I like your boy," he said. "He likes to look good for his master." Shlomo nodded to the man and then to me. I could tell he was smiling adorably with his eyes. I put him in the heel position again. As with the shoes, the assistant charged everything to my account and had it delivered to my room, along with the black leather gear Shlomo had been wearing. (I had Shlomo wear the white gear then.)

We went back upstairs to browse in the girls' section. "I don't shop here very often, " said Yvgenia. "Only for winter things. I hate clothes otherwise. I don't even have any clothes in my closet, only coats and boots. I like their jewelry though."

"I might hate clothes too if I had a body as pretty as yours," I said, and I meant it.

"Oh Trevor!" she said. "How sweet!" She kissed me lovingly in the aisle there. She really was coming back to life. "Your body is gorgeous, you silly boy!" she said.

"People keep telling me that," I said to her. Then I thought of something, "You don't have any clothes here?" I asked.

"Nope, none," she said.

"But we're supposed to wear our own undies for scenes," I said. "What do you do for panties?"

"Oh, they'll give you panties to use for a scene," she said. "They've got all the styles too, from plain cotton girl undies with ponies on them to crotchless thongs in gold lame. Really, it's more that you're encouraged to use your own undies because they think a kid's personal choice of undies they buy for their personal use tells the viewers more about who they are, and the viewers know that. Even when you dress in your dorky schoolboy costume, you might have something exciting and surprising and really sexy underneath your shorts. People know that about Frenetic videos, that kids might show them something outrageous, or maybe something childish and cute, when someone pulls their trousers down."

"Oh look at this!" I said, spying a brilliant, sparkling pink, ruffled, micro-miniskirt. "It's so pretty!" I said. I was still very unsure how far I wanted to take the prettiness thing, but the thought of wearing that skirt made me feel electric.

"You mean to make your boy wear?" she asked.

I paused. If she didn't know why I said that, what would she think when I told her? She already knew I liked to be pretty, but maybe she didn't know I wanted to try girl clothes too.

"Oh!" she said, "you mean for you!" I nodded to her, nervously trying to read her reaction. Her smile told me everything was ok. "I think that would really look cute on you," she said with a smile. We waved to the assistant to help me try on the skirt. She looked up my size and handed me one that would fit well.

"Now this one is particularly short," she said. "If you do not wear an undergarment, your organs will most certainly be visible while you are standing."

My organs? How long had this woman been working in a clothing store on a porn studio lot? "That's ok," I said, removing my vest. She took it from me, and I stepped into the skirt, pulling it up to my waist. I looked in the mirror and loved it! I pulled down my sexy white knickers with leather fringes to see how much would be visible.

Yvgenia giggled. "You've never worn a skirt before, have you?" I shook my head in embarrassment. She rotated it so the right side faced forward and helped me adjust it to where it should hang.

Looking in the mirror, I could see the last inch of my cock and the very bottom of my balls hanging out of the skirt. "I rather like that!" I said. "Makes me feel less hidden. If I need something under this, I have a few pairs of knickers and one nice pink thong that will go lovely with this."

I bought several skirts, all very short. I found a white leather one with fringes to go with the outfit I was wearing, a plain pink one that was so short that it covered nothing at all, like the one on the fairy costume at Gold Boys of Chelsea, one in gold lame, and a cobalt blue one that was really made of one inch wide strips of blue satin stitched at one end to the waistband in a slightly overlapping pattern. Something was always showing with that skirt. I loved the brilliant blue color, and I wanted to make a whole outfit out of it.

The assistant charged the skirts to my account, and I put my vest and my white leather fringed sexy knickers back on, along with my new white skirt with leather fringes.

When I asked about matching clothes and accessories for the blue skirt, the assistant showed me a cobalt blue, satin, button-up crop top and led me to a pair of cobalt blue Mary Janes, which I of course bought, along with a full set of deep-blue blue sapphire jewelry, a matching blue satin thong, and a dark shade of lipstick that Yvgenia and the cosmetics assistant both agreed would go well with the cobalt blue things. Then I had to get a matching cobalt blue purse with sapphires and diamonds mounted on gold, arrayed in the shape of a large butterfly on the flap. That purse alone was nearly three thousand quid, but I had to have it. Yvgenia topped everything off with a matching blue bow that was attached to a sort of comb to hold it in my hair. Then of course we had to go back down to the children's BDSM department to get Shlomo kitted with cobalt blue accessories. Everything was delivered to my room, and all of it went onto my account, which I depleted completely, topped back up to £5,000, depleted again, and then added £13,000 to cover my purchases, leaving £10,000 on the account before we left.

"Even with the lower prices," I said to Yvgenia as we left, "this stuff adds up fast!"

I looked at the clock, and it was already after 11:30, time for my helicopter ride, and I hadn't drawn any plans for my DAB rooms or even done a proper script for the live performance, let alone even thought about voiceovers, but Randy said he'd help me with a script over lunch, and my DAB rooms could wait…

***

"Would you like to go for a helicopter ride with me?" I asked Yvgenia as we exited the store.

"Oh no," she said with a sour face. "I get sick when I go up in those things. It's really bad too. They have to give me medicine that makes me all sleepy."

"Oh," I said, feeling dejected, "only Randy got the helicopter for me between now and one. I'd never even seen one up close before yesterday."

"Oh, you should go!" she said with a smile. "I'm sure you'll love it! It's really fun, only I get sick."

"Maybe I'll get sick too," I said.

"I'm sure you won't," she said. "Boys never get sick on helicopters. Only Jillian and me."

"Ok then," I said. "Would you like my boy then? To keep you company?"

She looked Shlomo over, her eyes lingering on his cock. "Sure."

I handed her his leash and said to him, "Be good, and obey Yvgenia! Remember, if she isn't smiling, you're not doing your job." He nodded enthusiastically, unable to speak with the white ball gag in place. "Yvgenia, feel free to remove the gag whenever you like," I added. "I imagine you might have plans for his tongue."

Chapter 57
Battersea and back

We kissed and parted company. I gave Shlomo's cock a few quick tugs too. I strutted across the lot, feeling extremely sexy, to the helipads. "You must be Trevor," said a man of about thirty, with short brown hair, wearing a blue blazer with a pilot's hat and sunglasses, as he offered me a handshake.

"Yes, I am," I said, returning the handshake. "Do you work for Frenetic or another company?" I asked.

Seeming a bit taken aback, he pointed to the ID badge he was wearing on the left breast of his blazer and said, "I am a Frenetic Studios employee. Why do you ask?"

I stood on my toes and puckered my lips, and he kissed me. "That's why," I said. "I like to say hello to people I meet with a kiss, but people who work for KCU have different rules, and it's not always ok for them. What's your name?" I asked.

"My goodness," he said. "I'm not very good at introducing myself, am I! My name is Marvin Jarvis, and I'm one of three helicopter pilots who work here."

"Pleased to meet you," I said.

"Likewise, I'm sure," he said. "Randy was right; you certainly are a beautiful young boy! He told me you've never been in a helicopter. Is that right?"

"That's right," I said, feeling my cheeks blush. "I've never been off of the ground except for climbing trees."

"I think you're going to like this, Trevor." He walked me around the outside of the big helicopter, showing me the skids, the main rotor, the tail rotor, and the two jet engines (I had thought only jets had jet engines), explaining what everything did to help the machine fly. Then he helped me into the left seat in the cockpit. (That's the area where the pilots sit. I told him with a wink that I liked the name.) I felt special because the left seat is where the captain normally sits, but as he explained, the left seat and the right seat both have all the same instruments and controls and things. Most of the instruments were displayed on different computer screens. He flipped a switch, and the computer screens came to life. He showed me instruments that said how high up we would be and how fast we would be going. He gave me a pair of sunglasses just like his and a headset with a microphone. I felt cool, like I was in a movie! He told me to just talk if I wanted him to hear me. I didn't have to push a button, but if he pushed a button, he was talking to someone called a controller, and that meant I had to be quiet.

"Where should I vomit if this makes me sick?" I asked.

"Has riding in a car ever made you feel ill?" he asked.

"No Sir," I said, "but a friend of mine says she always gets sick in helicopters."

"Some people have that problem," he said, handing me a paper bag lined with plastic, "but most people are fine. If you become sick, you can use that bag, but tell me if you feel ill, and I'll fly as smoothly as I can and try to land before you need to use that bag, ok?"

"Ok," I said.

"I am going to start the engine now," he said, flipping switches and turning knobs. He was reading things aloud from a card he was holding. He said that was to remind himself to do everything properly, and that he said each item aloud because everything we said was being recorded for safety reasons. If someone listened to the recording, he wanted them to know what he was doing. "You will hear a lot of strange sounds, including a loud whining sound. All of that is normal, but it can be confusing if you've never been in a jet-powered helicopter before. The main rotor will begin to turn as well. Now I want you to put on your harness." He helped me find all the straps that went over my shoulders, across my hips, and between my legs.

"Are we going to be flying upside-down?" I asked. I could think of no other reason for so many straps to hold me in place.

"No," he said with a smile and a wink. "Remember, the pilots are the only people who can keep the machine and the people onboard safe, and they have to stay in their seats, no matter what happens. Sometimes there can be bad turbulence… I mean really bumpy, air. When you fly through heavy winds, it can bounce the helicopter all around. If that happens, it's important that the pilot stays where he needs to be, and it's also important for us that you always stay where you need to be instead of bouncing off your seat into the controls."

"That sounds scary!" I said, feeling as much thrill as fear. This was a lovely, friendly man who had wanted a kiss, and who had said I was beautiful. I hoped someday we could have sex. That was two men I'd met (the other being Gary, the sound engineer) that morning who were really nice and who I wanted to have happy sex with.

"We shouldn't have any of that today, maybe a little when we're over the Thames," he said. "It's not unsafe when it happens. Some people even like it. I think it's rather fun, like a ride at a theme park, but some people don't like it, so pilots usually try to avoid it so their passengers can be comfortable. This helicopter is pretty big, and it takes some pretty strong winds to blow it about. Still, we must be safe."

"We're going to fly over the Thames?" I asked. "That must be miles from here."

"You'll find this helicopter is a pretty fast machine," he said with a smile, as sounds seemed to come from all around. I heard the whining sounds of the engines starting, but it wasn't as loud as I'd expected. Noises came from inside the cockpit as well, chimes, buzzing and whirring from the instruments and radio noises in my headphones. I might have become scared if he hadn't told me what to expect. He helped me adjust my headset and said, "I'm going to talk on the radio now, so please don't say anything." I nodded, and he said something fast and garbled that sounded like another language. Another voice responded in the same foreign language. "Are you ready for your first flight?" he asked, with the main rotor now spinning so fast I could no longer see it.

I suddenly felt so excited I wanted to laugh! "Yes Sir!" I said loudly, feeling my cheeks beginning to ache from my smile.

He smiled again and said, "There's no need to shout when you're wearing the headset." I giggled a little from embarrassment, which only made me feel more excited. "Remember, I showed you how the rotor blades tilted," he said, "I'm going to pull this lever and make them tilt now, and that will make us go straight up. Three… Two… One… Up we go!"

The helicopter leapt from the ground, and for the first time in my life, there was nothing between me and the ground below. I looked for something to hold on to, but the only things I could find were things he told me not to touch. I crossed my arms and held them to my chest, giggling with the thrill of it all. It was almost like the first time I left my clothes in one tree and climbed up another tree to wank.

"How do you feel, Trevor?" asked Marvin.

"I can't believe this!" I said. "It's like nothing is holding us up, and we're higher than all the buildings now!"

"The engine and the rotor are working with the air to hold us up instead of the ground," he said. "These machines are pretty incredible, aren't they!"

"Yes Sir, they are!" I giggled. "I can see the dormitory and apartments, and there's the pub and the store out my window!"

"Let's circle the lot so you can see everything there," he said.

The whole helicopter tilted to the left, but I didn't slide to the left. I just felt heavier, and I could see that we were turning. "Whoa!" I yelped. "That is so cool! Look at the helipads with the big H in the middle! And look how big the studio building really is!"

After we'd circled the lot, he asked, "Do you remember how we make the helicopter go faster?" he asked.

"Uh huh!" I said with excitement. "Stick forward and the clockter… clockterive… that lever… you pull that up, right?"

"That's the collective," he said with a grin, "but yes, that's right. Let's fly toward Battersea. You watch the airspeed indicator and tell me how fast we're going, ok?"

"Ok," I said. Just then the whole thing tilted forward as if it were trying to dump me through the front windscreen. I gasped out loud, but then I felt much heavier, and I didn't slide forward like I'd expected. I watched the needle go higher and higher on the instrument he wanted me to watch.

"How fast are we going, Trevor?"

"It says seventy, eighty, ninety," I said. "Wow! That's faster than we can go on the M1! One hundred, now one-ten, one-twenty…"

"Remember, Trevor," he said, "That reads in knots, not kilometers per hour. One hundred twenty knots is about one hundred and forty miles per hour, which is about two hundred twenty kph."

"Wow!" I said. Everything about flying was so exciting! "Now it says one-sixty, one-seventy, one-eighty! How fast are we going to go?" I asked.

"We'll keep it here at about one-eighty," he said. "That's a bit over two hundred miles per hour, but we have to consider a few other things. Air up here is thinner than air on the ground, so that makes the instrument read slower than we are actually going. The wind is also blowing us from behind, so we are moving over the ground at close to two hundred and fifty miles per hour."

A voice over the radio interrupted our conversation, so I stayed quiet while he was talking. I didn't know anything went so fast! Mum never drove more than 60 mph ever, and she never even drove 55 mph unless she'd been drinking, but we were going 250, which I figured out later was over 400 kph!

"We have to go down a little lower now, Trevor," he said. "We have to make sure there's room for the aircraft going to Heathrow." I nodded, not really caring how high or low we were. If we were higher than the top of the London Eye, we were really high!

Suddenly my seat moved away from my ass, and my stomach went wooshing up into my chest, like when a fast elevator suddenly goes down. I yelped as we headed down a little lower. "Sorry, Trevor," he said. "I could have done that a little more smoothly, but you seem to like these feelings of moving around in the air."

"It was fun!" I said loudly. "How come you're not laughing and all excited! This must be the funnest thing in the world besides child porn! Maybe I should become a helicopter pilot when I grow up and I'm too old to make child porn!"

"Flying is always fun," he said, "but I have a very complex machine I have to manage, and the life of a precious and beautiful young boy to protect. I need to be careful with all that responsibility, but I assure you, I love every minute I spend in the air, every single second of it."

"I would too!" I said. He said I was beautiful… but never mind that. Flying for the first time ever was too thrilling to think about being pretty.

We crossed the Thames, and the air was just a little bumpy, like he'd said, but it wasn't enough to make anyone bounce out of their seats if they weren't strapped in. We flew once around the old power station in Battersea, then back to the Frenetic Studios lot. He let me handle the stick and collective for a while too, though he had to work the pedals. My legs weren't long enough to reach them properly. I could make the helicopter tip from side to side or forward and back. He showed me how to keep the helicopter at the same level while pushing it forward and turning, though I wasn't very good at it. But I was flying it! I was doing that! I was so excited my leg began bouncing up and down uncontrollably. I couldn't stop it, and it went on for three or four minutes, bouncing harder and harder. He put his hand on my bare leg and held it down, chuckling a little. "There's no need to be that excited," he said.

Then I got a boner. A big, hard boner! I was so excited, and his touch seemed to be more than my body could control. "Hello there!" He said with a grin. He took his hand off my leg and gave me a quick cock tug through my knickers. I yelped and spasmed. I wasn't cumming, but I sure was sensitive.

He took his hand away and said, "I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable. I was hoping to calm you down."

"No! Not uncomfortable! Not at all!" I said. "It's all just… it's so exciting! I don't know why I got a stiffy!"

"Sometimes boys just do," he said. "I sure did. I used to hold my satchel or a book in front of me when it happened, but you boys from the lot, well, you don't wear enough to cover it if you want to keep it private. You have it there for all to see, and you don't seem to mind. I wish I had that attitude as a boy."

"Oh I want people to see it," I said. "People like to see a boy with a boner. It makes them happy. Doesn't it make you happy?"

"Maybe if I weren't flying this machine I could give you a better answer," he said, "but I can't pay attention to that right now. I need to get you back the ground safely. Flying and sex can never go together for a pilot."

"Ok," I said. "I understand." I understood that while he was in the air he couldn't do anything sexual, but I thought he might also be telling me that on the ground he might really like a boy's boner.

I felt a little sadness as the ground got closer and closer, and the helicopter leaned back further and further. My first flight had been the most amazing experience since… well, it was really amazing! But I'd had a lot of amazing experiences in those four days. When we touched down on the helipad, it took Marvin a minute to flip switches and turn knobs, again reading aloud from a card, before the engine started to slow down.

He took off his headset and motioned for me to do the same. He asked, "So how did you like your first flight?"

"It was brilliant!" I said loudly. I released my harness and knelt on my seat, facing him. I leaned across the wide center console to kiss him. It turned into a long kiss. He put his hands on my bare lower back and stroked my skin. I reached between his legs and felt his cock hardening. "You do like boys with boners," I said. He nodded. With my right arm around his neck, I undid his zip and dug his cock out with my left hand. I began stroking it slowly. "Thanks for the exciting time you just gave me, Marvin. I hope I can give you an exciting time now."

His cock was about as thick as Randy's, but quite a bit longer. I leaned down and took his hard cock into my mouth. I sucked up and down, tickling his balls occasionally. The cockpit was roomy, but cramped with all the controls and things. Still, I was small enough to move around easily. I pushed my head down hard, forcing his cock in deep. I didn't gag. I was too excited to gag. I was too excited… I needed to relax to do deep throat, and I wanted to give him that. I closed my eyes and rested my head on his cock, holding my head up by the back of my throat. I thought about his cock head, and how much it wanted to crawl into my throat, and how happy it would make him. I put his hand on my head, and I pushed his hand into my head, hard. I put my weight onto his cock, and soon my throat opened up and let him in. Now he sounded like I did when we were flying!

I deep throated him for about two minutes while pulling my knickers and vest off for the third time that day, and it still wasn't lunchtime yet. I pulled him slowly out of my throat. He stroked my hair and said, "Trevor, I have never had a boy do that for me. I have never had anyone do that for me." I smiled proudly at him. It felt wonderful to know I could give him something that made him feel so good! It felt much better than giving someone a present or doing a favor for someone.

He helped me over the center console and held me on his lap facing him. He opened the door on his side of the cockpit to make room for my left leg. I licked my finger to get it all slobbery, and then stuck it in my ass. It's a tricky thing to use saliva as lube for anal, but for some reason, giving deep throat causes this extra slimy saliva to come up from the throat, which works brilliantly as lube. I grabbed his stiff cock and guided it to my hole. I looked into his eyes, or I tried to (we were both still wearing sunglasses), and held my ass cheeks open as I slid down onto his cock.

This was all for Marvin. I wanted to say thanks for the ride in his helicopter, but more than that, I wanted to share my love and pleasure with a man who seemed to want it very badly. I couldn't possibly think of myself cumming yet again before the live show. Still, I was hard, even a bit sore. I sat still with his cock all the way in. I reached my arms around his neck and kissed him as sweetly as I could. Then I began to lift up slowly, then back down, very slowly, grinning impishly. Well, I felt impish. I was trying to tease him by going so slow. "What do you like most about boys?" I asked, still moving very slowly up and down.

"Everything, of… of c-course!" he replied. "Your face is so beautiful," he said, removing my sunglasses. I pulled his sunglasses off and saw his eyes for the first time. They were a very pretty blue. His expression looked almost worried, but I had learned by then that we all have different faces we make when we have sex, and usually the best sex makes us have the oddest expressions.

"Your skin is so soft," he continued, "and your body is, I don't know, not exactly soft, but certainly not hard like men and their hard muscles. You have youth and energy. You have honest excitement. And you're just plain beautiful!"

I opened wide and kissed him more passionately, starting to go a little faster on his cock with my ass. I hadn't meant to ask for compliments about my body. I wanted to know how I could please him best, and he hadn't really told me that. He grunted through the kisses, and I could feel some of that energy in my ass, right behind my cock. I wasn't going to cum this time though. I couldn't let myself do that! I wanted him to cum, so I moved even faster, still holding the grunting kiss. I could feel his hands squeezing my ass, helping me up and down. Then he began thrusting with his hips, faster and faster. That made me groan, but I kept kissing him. Soon he was doing all the work. He held my ass still as I kissed him while he pounded furiously.

He threw his head back, breaking our kiss, and howled. I let him continue to thrust as he liked, without trying to force anything on him. I looked into his pretty blue eyes a little longer before he began kissing me again. I could feel some of his cum leaking out. I wanted to clean him off with my mouth, but I hadn't had an enema yet, so I didn't much fancy ATM. I reached down and wiped up some of the dripping cum with my fingers. I looked into his eyes as I licked and sucked my fingers clean. It almost felt as if he came again when I did that. Men really seem to like it when boys swallow their cum.

After resting in his calm embrace for a few minutes, I slowly let his cock slide out of my ass. "I have never had a man give me the thrill you just gave me in the air, Marvin," I said with a smile, "so I guess we're even."

From that moment on, I have had a love for aviation.

KING HAWK:

"We thank you for your service, Messenger, and we will pay the customary fee for messengers to our court."

KING HAWK pays the MESSENGER his fee with a blowjob while seated in his throne, deep throat if possible, as boys look on. MESSENGER shoots cleanly into King's mouth.

Chapter 58
Script

I got back to the dormitory at 12:15 or so. This time I wasn't surprised to see Yvgenia lying on her back, holding Shlomo's leash as he ate her pussy hungrily. I saw his white ball gag was on my end table. I sat down on her bed again and wrapped my arm around her right thigh. "I hope my boy is treating you well," I said. She nodded and grunted at the same time. "You know, he is my boy, and what he does, he does for me." She looked me in the eye and moaned desperately. "When he fucks you, I am fucking you. When he eats your pussy, I am eating your pussy." She gazed into my eyes and howled. "I do love you, Yvgenia." She shoved her pussy violently into Shlomo's face. The boy did a valiant job of holding on as she screamed through her orgasm.

She sat up and said, "That's not fair!"

We kissed, and I said, "It's all true, Yvgenia. I do love you, and he is my boy. My love channels through him. Besides, it's so lovely to see you interested in sex again!" I snuck in another kiss.

"Love and sex are different, but they're connected. If you use love to make me cum, is that fair?" she asked.

"Randy says that all real sex is an act of love," I replied. "We make each other feel good because we love each other."

"But you can't ever be in love with me," she said.

"I don't think I can," I said. "I'm in love with Annie, and I just don't feel the same way about girls as I do about boys, but I'd love to have sex with you whenever you like. You will always be special to me. Now that I have money, I love shopping, and you are really good at helping me find nice things. You can help me with my makeup, and I will always listen and give you hugs and kisses if you're feeling sad. I don't like to see you sad. I learned that when I love someone, I get to share half of their happiness, and half of their sadness, but if I get to feel half of your sadness, that means you won't have to feel it all by yourself. You only have to feel half of it while I get the other half."

"You're such a sweet boy!" she said. "Why are all of you nice boys gay?"

"Maybe that's because most of the boys who do child porn here are hired because we like other boys and men?"

"I guess that makes sense," she said. "The boy-boy and especially the man-boy stuff are the most popular films we do here, including all that adult stuff."

"I don't know about Hiro and Kenji though," I said. "I've never actually asked them. They seem to do whatever's needed. They like to perform with boys, but that doesn't mean they're gay. "

"It doesn't mean they'll be my boyfriend either."

"They really are sweet, don't you think?"

"Especially Hiro," she said. "He is sweeter, but I think Kenji is sexier."

"I agree," I said. "I get to try them both side by side this afternoon in a live show."

"Lucky!"

***

I kissed Yvgenia and Shlomo. She smiled and he radiated joy. "Boy, keep her happy," I told him, "and make sure she cums at least once every five minutes. I've heard girls can do that. I will be listening, and if I don't hear her scream every five minutes, you will be punished. Now I have some work I need to do."

"Trevor!" Yvgenia loudly protested.

"Yes Master."

Yvgenia looked nervous, but she couldn't hide her growing smile for more than a few seconds. She was really enjoying her return to sex, and Shlomo seemed the perfect play partner for her, with his huge cock, his super-cute looks, and his sweet disposition.

I went into my walk-in closet and saw that my purchases from Almost Heaven had been delivered and put on hangers or left in boxes on my shelves. I opened up my new laptop computer on my makeup table. I knew how to use my email, and that was all I needed to write my script. I thought about the ideas I had so far. Pao Pao would present the boys to me, the king, as a gift from some far-off land – from the king of that far-off land. I would start off in my throne, and he would enter with the boys. There should be a voiceover. I should say something like, "I am the king of…" Of where? "I am His Majesty, King Trevor of…" I liked that. Where though? Never Neverland? I liked Peter Pan, but I wanted something a little newer. Trevor Neverland? That sounded good. "King Trevor of Trevor Neverland." That didn't sound so good. Maybe King Hawk? "I am His Majesty, King Hawk of Trevor Neverland." Awesome! The curtain would come up, I would be in my throne, and that would play over the speakers.

Then what? Pao Pao and the boys enter. What should I say? "One day, a man came to give me two cute boys from a far-off land." That doesn't work. He was from a king… he represented a king. What are they called? A messenger? An ambassary? No, that wasn't the right word… Messenger is fine. "One day, a messenger from a king…" No, how about, "One day a king's messenger came from a far-off land…" Almost. "One day a messenger came from a king of a far-off land…" I did't want to say came. In porn that usually means he shot his load. Arrived means the same as came. "One day a king's messenger arrived from a far-off land…" Good! "He arrived with two boys as a gift…" When someone important comes from a far-off land, they don't arrive with a gift. They come bearing gifts. I mean, they arrive bearing gifts, like the Three Wise Men they talk about at Christmastime. "One day a king's messenger arrived from a far-off land bearing a gift of two boys." Should I say they were pretty boys? Sexy boys? Beautiful boys? Yes, beautiful. I liked that. They will be beautiful boys.

Yvgenia let out a howling scream.

Then we could just speak the lines after that. I only wanted a few lines so no one had to memorize anything. I'd had the idea the day before that I should ask Pao Pao to prove they are a worthy gift, so he would lie down on my rug, and each of them would pull his sexy knickers down and sit on Pao Pao's big cock, all the way down, and then step off. Kenji should go first. They should make it look painful to show they are willing to suffer for their new master. I should say that in the voiceover. "I required a show of their worth. I made them sit on the messenger's huge cock to show they were willing to suffer for me." That sounded great, but then I thought it should be a broad cock, not a huge one. Broad means the same as wide, and that means it's thick. But Pao Pao's cock was also long. I needed a word that meant the same as long. Long… lengthy… whatever. I thought lengthy sounded better than long, so I scribbled, "I required a show of their worth. I made them sit on the messenger's broad and lengthy cock to show they were willing to suffer for me."

I would accept the gift, and Pao Pao would leave after I give him a fee for his delivery service, my best blowjob from my throne, with the boys at my feet watching. He would have to cum quickly though. Maybe he would need an FSP backstage to get him ready for that?

Then I had to get Yuko onstage. I'd thought maybe she should be their wet nurse, so the boys should suck her nipples, but maybe they would nurse on her cock? She had small breasts, but nursing on a cock seemed sexier. She would enter the stage and I would introduce her. They would suck her nipples, and I would correct them and have them nurse from her cock. But why would I have a wet nurse waiting for the boys who were just given to me as a gift? I'd thought earlier that she might just walk in as a servant to my house, but it still didn't make sense that I'd have someone ready for the job. This was complicated. It was fun though!

Then I thought, Yuko is Japanese, and the boys are Japanese, so maybe the king from far away sent their wet nurse along with them? How would that work…? She could enter with Pao Pao and the boys. On a leash? No, she was the wet nurse, not a slave. I would have to say that in the voiceover. Then they would know to suck her cock to get their nutrients, not her nipples. I should have them both suck her cock, but I would finish her off to sample the quality of her cum. Great!

Mr. Watanabe wanted to see me with his boys. I would have the wet nurse exit then, and come up with something for the boys and me alone. What could I do that was bigger than what they'd already done though? They'd have already had Pao Pao's huge cock in their asses and sucked on Yuko's big cock. Neither of them had a cock long enough to really fuck me, and after those two big cocks in their asses and mouths, mine would look small and stupid fucking them.

Then it came to me. Conventional sex was finished for these boys. They needed bondage. I would have them wearing yellow and blue ankle and wrist cuffs to match their knickers and collars. I would need two racks, those racks shaped like an X, like the one Robbie was hung on for me when we filmed my first scene. Maybe Pao Pao shouldn't exit. Maybe he should just stay off to the side, and Yuko too. They should roll those racks in… no, they should already be upstage… but then it would be difficult to see them. Yes, they should be on wheels and rolled downstage. Then Pao Pao and Yuko would mount the boys onto their X racks (which I later learned were called bondage crosses, or St. Andrew's crosses) and leave. I would go back and forth, sucking them and fucking them roughly with my big scepter dildo. Then I had an even better idea…

Yvgenia screamed, and this time she used language that would have resulted in severe punishment at Preston Primary.

I called the costume shop from the phone at my makeup table and told Nellie I needed the colored cuffs as well as the collars and leashes that Rhys had done up for us the night before. She said they would be waiting in the dressing room. Then I called the scenery department and ordered the bondage crosses. One more call to the Alain Emery Theater, and Rick said he'd have a few tubes of cherry lube waiting in the green room. Everything would be ready, and I wouldn't need an enema. I felt a slight pang of disappointment in that, but the story was better that way. No one fucks the king in his ass.

***

I looked over my lines for the voiceover and decided I had enough time to go to the studios in the office building to record them before lunch. Since Annie would be at lunch, I decided to wear my new white skirt that matched my vest and undies. I put my Visa in the top drawer under my makeup table, and I put my cell phone in my purse. I sent a copy of the script to my own email so I would have it on my cell phone. I freshened up the little bit of makeup I was wearing, then kissed Yvgenia and Shlomo, who were cuddling in Yvgenia's bed, though I could see Shlomo had four of his fingers inside Yvgenia's pussy, clearly intending to follow my command, and she was breathing heavily, apparently exhausted.

"Boy," I said, "If Yvgenia tells you she needs a break, you will pause for twenty minutes. Then you will make her cum every five minutes again. I have errands to run."

"Yes Master," he squeaked, wearing such a sweet smile that I was tempted to remain in the dorm and join the two of them. Although I got another stiffy, I walked to the voiceover studios, feeling incredibly sexy again.

***

I was happy that Gary happened to be free. "You've added to your outfit," he said. "I love those boots!" I smiled proudly. "And a matching miniskirt! Did you find all that at Almost Heaven? It looks far out, and pretty too. Very sexy."

I smiled proudly and said, "Thank you!" I hesitated before saying, "If you think I'm sexy, maybe some time you'd like to, I mean, I think you're sexy too. I think boys and men should have long hair, and, um, I really like you."

"Really?" he said with his eyes open wide. After a pause he said, "We'll have to talk about that another time, and I'll have to check with your agent, too. Right now, we've got some important work to do."

He still had everything set up from my session that morning, including the black microphone they'd called the 319. I looked at it closely and noticed it said "MK-319" in gold letters on the front of the microphone. Gary said it was a cheap one that was made in Russia, which was why Norman, the producer that morning, was reluctant to use it, but everyone agreed it was a surprisingly good sounding microphone for my voice.

Gary had been in the process of editing my voiceovers from that morning, but for the live show, all he had to do was record each line into the computer, and the sound designers at the Alain Emery Theater would take care of everything else. So it would take very little of his time to record me. I read my five lines a few times each before we were both happy with them, and after kissing Gary (and rubbing his hardening cock over his jeans), I went to lunch. The whole recording session took less than fifteen minutes. I thought of Gary on my way to lunch, and I wished we'd had more time. I really liked that man, but I had a very busy day, and he knew it when he ushered me out of the studio with a kiss.

***

"Annie!" I shouted, running over to kiss the most beautiful boy beneath Olympus! He was sitting at a table alone, which seemed a sad thought for such a beautiful boy. He was wearing a yellow sundress, matching yellow Mary Janes, white ankle socks, and a daisy in his hair, above his left ear. "Annie, I love you so much, and you're so pretty, and I've missed you!"

He giggled softly and said, "I've missed you too, sweetie, but it's only been since yesterday." We kissed again for a long time. It was one of those kisses where the world disappeared, and all that remained was heaven in Annie's lips, and the indescribable joy I felt knowing that he was in love with me. "Where's your pet boy?" he asked.

"Shlomo's been keeping Yvgenia company," I said. "She's been coming out of her shell a bit since breakfast, and I thought if she wasn't alone, she might be able to stay cheered up a while longer."

Annie looked me over and said, "Trevor! I love that outfit! And you're wearing a skirt!"

"Really? You like it?" I asked. I'd wondered how he would feel about me wearing actual girls' clothes instead of pretty femboy clothes.

"I think you look adorable and very, very sexy!" He kissed me and rubbed my cock through my skirt. It started to inflate again, but he only rubbed for two seconds or so.

"You bloody tease!" I said with a smile. He giggled, and we sat down. "I guess we're a bit early," I said, looking at the clock. It was 12:53, and cast and crew weren't usually dismissed until 1:00, unless they finished early. "I didn't even ask, did you have a scene this morning? Or were you off?"

"I had a scene, and we wrapped early," he said. "It was for that Ladyboys and the Lazy Boy project. Boris is working on that one too, but he was filming on another stage. They really do want to get that one out," he said. "They wanted a Western white boy to visit their home to learn how to be a ladyboy, so we did a big group scene, which was meant to be my education. I had to start the scene in boys' clothes and no makeup, even a pair of stupid Y-fronts, but you know how quickly those come off." I decided then that I would not wear Y-fronts again.

"Can I see you without your makeup some time? And in boys clothes?"

"Why do you want that?" he asked.

"I don't know," I said. "I don't understand why I want it. I think it's because I've fallen in love with you looking like a girl, but I want to see the rest of you. I want to see the boy in you. It's like, I want to know the whole you. I think. I'm not sure, but it feels like a nice thing to want."

"Oh sweetie," he said, kissing me, "yes, I will do that for you. I'll do anything for you that I'll do in front of a camera, for sure. But what you've seen of me so far is the real me. You know I'm a boy, and you know I'm a boy who likes to be pretty and girly, like you do sometimes. You've certainly seen enough of my body to know that." I giggled and nodded. "It doesn't matter why," he continued. "If you want to see me that way, I will dress that way for you." I kissed him and felt extremely special.

***

Randy, Sebastian, and Boris arrived a few minutes later, and after kisses all around, they sat down. "You look spectacular Hawk!" said Randy. "I guess they had just what you needed at Almost Heaven. I love the boots!"

"Of course you do, you old perv!" I said with a giggle to the boy-leg fetishist. "They make my thighs look super sexy."

"That they do, Hawk, they certainly do!"

"Wear now skirt for girl, Trevor Boy?" asked Boris.

"Yeah," I said. "I want to try dressing more like a girl for a while. And I'm wearing all white, so when you and I stand together, we might look gray from a distance."

Annie giggled, but I don't think anyone else understood what I meant. I kissed him to thank him for getting my joke. (I think he was probably the cleverest kid at the table.) One of the few things I'd learned from Preston Primary is that when you mix white and black, they look gray.

We sat down with Annie on my right and Randy on my left, groping my bare thigh. I liked it when he did that because it made me feel sexy, and it made him feel good. "Randy," I said, "Gary in the recording studio says he needs to talk to you. I went over to do some voiceovers for the live show, and he said he needed to talk to you before he would play with me."

"Gary is a good man," said Randy. "He wants to be careful since you are new here, and because of what happened with Buford. There's also a rule that your agent must sign a release for you to play with adults when you're away from the set. I signed yours when I signed your contract on Monday so Markus and Mr. White could have fun with us on your victory drive." I giggled, remembering the fun we all had on that drive. "All Gary had to do was check the computer," he continued. "We keep the releases on the computer so adults in the studio complex can easily verify that they have permission. I'll have a word with him so he knows you can play. If I might give you some advice, you might want to do it on the settee in the studio control room and have him run some music through the sound system while you play. The weird sound of the room makes the music feel almost supernatural, and the sex can be amazing."

I'd forgotten the rule about the agent having to sign off for kids and adults to play. It was posted in the bath hall. That must have meant Marvin, the helicopter pilot, had already looked before our flight. "I think the pilot knew about that rule," I said

"Oh, that's right! You had your helicopter ride today. How was it?" he asked.

"It was brilliant!" I said. I told everyone about it, how fast we went, seeing that there was nothing under us to hold us up, the feeling of being heavier, then my stomach feeling funny when we went down, and how the whole thing tipped when we turned or went faster.

"It sounds like you really enjoyed yourself," said Randy. "Then you and Marvin played a bit?"

"Yeah," I said. "I gave him a nice deep throat in the cockpit after we landed, to say thanks. Then I sat on his lap and he fucked me. He looked like I felt when we were flying!"

"I know he liked that!" said Randy. "Marvin absolutely loves boys. I mean he really loves you boys. But I hope you haven't been cumming too much before your live show, have you?"

"No," I said, pretending to be confident. "I've been careful. I didn't cum with Marvin."

***

Yvgenia joined us, to everyone's surprise. She was leading my boy by the leash. "Hello Yvgenia!" said Randy with some excitement. "Join us, will you?" He pulled a chair out for her to his left. She kissed him and sat down, handing me my boy's leash. Shlomo sat on the floor behind me.

We ordered our lunch and talked for a while about Sebastian and Boris' scenes. I ordered lunch for myself and Shlomo, but I'd made a mistake, and he had to speak up. "Please Master, I'm sorry, but I'm not allowed to eat ham because I'm Jewish. My meals have to be kosher. I'll just not eat now, if that's ok with Master." I wanted to say how sorry I was to do something against his religion, but I didn't think it was proper for a master to apologize.

"That is not ok with Master," I said to Shlomo. "You will eat your three meals that are ok with your religion each day and take proper care of your lovely body."

He blushed and looked down smiling. "Yes Master," he said clearly.

The waiter made a few suggestions from the kosher menu, though Shlomo had it memorized. I let him choose his own meal, which was fish and chips with fresh broccoli. That seemed an odd choice to me for a boy who could have anything.

My plan was to make him eat on the floor like a proper pet, but I felt so bad after my mistake I let him off his leash to sit between Annie and Boris. I didn't know why I felt so bad. I never knew Jews couldn't eat meat that came from pigs. No one had told me. It was the religion thing though. I felt very strongly about learning about other people's religions and respecting them. I didn't have a religion of my own. All Mum taught us at home was the religion of gin – her "reli-gin." She thought that was funny. Preston Primary wasn't a very good school, but there were a few teachers who were wonderful, and the librarian taught me things about lots of religions, but not the rule about Jews and pork. I thought that was weird, because she was Jewish too. Her husband later became an MP, which actually made me sad because she quit her job to become active in social issues or something like that. One less good person working at my school.

Boris was in a very good mood. He always got that way when he worked on ladyboy scenes. "Big movie," he said. "Much for scenes. You no believe I think. Eight scene for movie, all for ladyboy group, Boris in six scenes! For suck ladyboy, for fuck ladyboy, for ladyboy suck, is all things! Is for ladyboy all like Boris for boy. All try for please Boris! All ladyboy please for Boris!" He was smiling as if he couldn't believe his luck. I was glad to see a porn star could still be that excited about sex. I had wondered what would happen if I got too much sex. Would I get bored? Then I became aware of Randy's hand on my thigh, and I started to get stiff again. No problem so far.

"I start acting as the Euro ladyboy trying to please Boris tomorrow," said Annie, flashing Boris a seductive wink.

"Annie know for please Boris much!" said Boris. They giggled and kissed in front of my boy. "He have for mouth full with magic. Think he have swallow magical fairy."

We all had a good laugh. Then Sebastian talked about his scene. "Go very well for Sebastian, Baron, but think not much so good for Amber," he said. "Not get for him cock in pussy, not for mouth, not for ass. Director say first no expect for her get Baron in, but Amber say can do. Then change for script. Baron laugh nice, say is ok for not fit Amber. Fuck for Sebastian mouth, then fuck for ass. Is very good. Much good for ass. Amber sit for face of Baron. Eat for her pussy. She like! Baron have tongue like for cock! Is long very much. Much scream for her! Amber ass hurt though. Much sore. Not go for nurse. Want much for work scene, so not stop. Find blood in ass for her. Director much angry for her not say hurt." He thought a moment then said, "No angry. Angry is not right word. Much disappoint I think? Frustrate for him, feels for him much bad for Amber, but also say scene no use when actor get hurt. Say need do scene other again with other girl. Nurse look for ass, say not bad, is common for fissure, but send for her clinic. No more can do for her anal until must see Dr. Gupta tomorrow in morning, get permission. Poor for Amber, but happy for Sebastian!" he said, lighting up. "Now can do scene again today with Baron! Director find other girl, maybe talk for Claire. He like big… she like big man cock."

Sebastian knew all about the ass, given his special place in child porn. He knew exactly what a fissure was, though no one else at the table but Boris and Randy did. It's what happens when the ass is stretched a little too far, either from sex or from pushing too hard while shitting, especially if you're constipated, and a weak spot on the anal skin cracks open. It's not serious, and it heals in a few days usually. Most people don't even know they have one until they see a little blood on their toilet tissue or until it gets infected in some people, but that's really rare. These are things they teach kids in advanced sex and stagecraft courses, or ASS, which only Boris had taken. Sebastian just liked studying the human ass, so he knew much more than Boris did.

When Sebastian and Boris finished explaining about anal fissures, I showed Randy my script. "This is good," he said. "Really good for your first script, Hawk! And you recorded all the voiceovers already?"

"Yes," I replied. "Gary says they should have them at the theater so their people can work on them and put them into the show."

"That's great news!" said Randy. "I see you have ATM and a couple deep throats in here too, nice bonus pay. Can I make one suggestion about your script?" he asked. "It might look better if you have the boys' crosses facing each other, sort of at an angle, cheating toward the audience. (Cheating is stage talk for turning a little bit toward the audience when you're supposed to be sideways.) That way they can look at each other while you work them over, and you'll spend less time walking around them and more time working on them."

"Ok," I said. "You really like it?"

"Yes I do," he said. "In fact, I'd like you to email me a copy of it so I can get it to Rick. Do you remember him from yesterday? The stage manager?" I nodded. "I'll make that change to have the crosses face each other, and everything should be all set, as long as costumes, props, and scenery are all set." I nodded. "Do you want them to choose the music and lighting for the performance?"

I knew nothing about lights, and not much about music, so I said, "That's fine."

"You're the director, Hawk," he said, "so you get to decide everything, including music and lights."

"Well, as long as it sounds like music that fits a castle and a king, it's fine. As long as the lights let you see everything that's important, it's fine. But maybe there should be a bright light pointed at my throne, to show I'm the important king?"

"Ok," said Randy, "I'm sure that's not a problem, but the bright light in your eyes will be brighter than it was during yesterday's show. Is that ok?"

"Yes, That's fine," I said, "as long as it makes me look important and sexy!"

Randy chuckled and said, "there is no lighting anywhere that can make you not look sexy, Hawk." I smiled at him, and I think I blushed a bit. Then he continued, "After your promo screening, we'll go to the Emery theater, and they'll play some of the music for you and show you their lighting ideas. Don't be afraid to ask them to show you something different or tell them if you want changes. That's what directors do, and Mr. Watanabe wants everything to be exactly the way you want it."

"Can I bring my boy to the screening?" I asked.

"I don't… Maybe," said Randy. "Maybe that would make a good impression on the creative designers to show them that you really are the person in the promo video. Sure, if he hasn't got a scene, bring him along."

"I don't have a scene, Master," said Shlomo. "May I join you?"

I don't think there is a single person in the world with enough evil in their heart to be able to resist Shlomo's pleading smile. I was glad I had already decided to take him along as soon as Randy said it was ok. "Do you need him?" I asked Yvgenia.

"No, thanks," she said. "I have to spend the afternoon in the clinic. Again." She sighed sadly.

I snapped my fingers and said, "Boy." Shlomo scurried around the table and laid his head across Yvgenia's lap. Yvgenia stroked his hair.

"It's just that stupid Linda," she said. "It's like I'm not allowed to hate this diabetes. I don't know what she wants."

"I'm sorry," I said. "When I felt like that, it seemed she just wanted me to tell her I was angry about how she was doing things. She seems to like that."

"It's true," said Annie. "More than anything, she wants to hear you being honest, and not pretending things are ok, and definitely not telling her what you think she wants to hear."

"Oh I'm not pretending things are ok," she said. "That's for sure."

"Good!" said Annie. "Then the best way to get her clearance to work again is to tell the truth. If the truth is that you want her to go fuck herself, then tell her that is what you want. Be careful though. Don't really tell her to go fuck herself. That's abusive language. Always say 'I feel' something, then 'I want' something, like 'I feel angry, and I want you to go fuck yourself.' She will actually help you to talk like that."

"I told her I wanted her to die," said Yvgenia, "and she didn't like it. But I didn't say it like you just said it. I said, 'Go die! Leave me alone!' I'll ask her about that stuff."

"Linda for you have surprise some time," said Boris. "Very nice for her, want for you be better. Work for Yvgenia be better."

"Boris is right," said Annie. "She'll love it if you start your session by asking her about the right way to tell her you want her to go fuck herself, she really will!" Yvgenia let a small laugh escape, and we all had a good little giggle.

"I wish I could take your boy to my appointments, Trevor," said Yvgenia. "It would be almost like having you there too."

That scared me. I was sitting right next to Annie, and Yvgenia was practically professing her love for me! "I'm glad… er, I mean, I like to help you feel better, and I'm glad to think that being there with you would help."

I reached under the table and held Annie's hand. I wanted so badly to say, "I'm gay, and I love you, not her!"

He wanted me to know it was ok without telling Yvgenia she'd said something that upset anyone. He smiled and said, "I'll bet Trevor is a great person to have around when you need cheering up." We didn't kiss or anything. That would be too much like rubbing Ygenia's nose into the fact that I was Annie's, and I could never be hers.

"Yeah, he is," said Yvgenia with a slight smile. It was still a little awkward, but I think Annie had saved it from being a terrible scene.

***

We ate our lunch and passed the remaining time talking with Yvgenia about what she wanted to do first when she was released to work again. "I would do a gangbang with fifty boys! No, a hundred!" she said with excitement. "After all this time off, I think I need a good gangbang. Ok, maybe twenty, but they have to have nice sized cocks, like Shlomo's. Maybe teenage boys!"

"Have you spoken with you agent about this idea?" asked Randy. "He might set that up for you. Gangbangs on children always sell very well."

"I should talk to him," she said. "It's making me horny just thinking about it." Shlomo made a purring sound, and she scratched his head.

"You can have him again after our live show if you like," I told her.

"We'll see," she said with the biggest smile I'd seen on her face yet. I couldn't see under the table, but from the way her shoulder was moving, I thought she was rubbing her pussy.

"Is good for see horny," said Sebastian. "Is much time for see Yvgenia horny. Time for no sad! Time for horny again!" He leaned over and kissed her, and she didn't release him right away either.

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