| Home ~ Reviews ~ 4 ~ 5 ~ 6 ~ 7 ~ 8 |
Title |
Amanda |
Author |
Shadow Cleric |
Story Code(s) |
M/F, Teen |
Length |
1,600 words |
Rating |
6.0 |
Summary |
Boy and girl have been friends for a long time. Boy and girl are both on the swim team. Swim team goes to a meet in a distant town. Boy and girl take the opportunity to get buck naked and fuck. |
Commentary |
I liked this story. There was a little build up. The story gave
some background. The narrator and Amanda were not in
the sack from the get go. For a first attempt I thought it
was a decent one. It was a little short, but the author did pace the story. The characters could have been fleshed out a little more. My advice to the author is to put these two characters in different situations, both with and without each other, and show how the sexual tension affects them before having them jump in the sack together. |
ASSM |
Amanda |