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Title

 Getting Wet

Author

 Belfast Bloke

Story Code(s)

 M/F, Teen

Length

 4,900 words

Arousal

 4 out of 5

Story

 3 out of 5

Objective Analysis

 7 out of 10

Subjective Analysis

 Good

Summary

 A young man, presumably in his late teens, arrives at his friend's house soaking wet. His friend isn't home, but his friend's 15-year- old sister Katie is. The narrator seems shocked when Katie insists that he take off all his clothes in front of her. Eventually he mellows.

Commentary

 This is a very arousing story. The fact that the narrator seems to have some sense of loyalty to his friend made the situation more interesting. Katie's forwardness also made the story more arousing.

There are things I liked about this story and things I didn't. I liked the plot. It could probably flow more smoothly, but I still liked it. It seems logical enough. I liked the characters. They seem realistic enough, for the most part.

I did not like the fact that the author did not have a line break or an indentation at the beginning of each paragraph. I also felt that the narrator did a bit too much "mind reading" instead of just describing how he was feeling or what he saw. There is also the fact that the narrator twice takes off his jeans without seeming to put them back on after his removes them the first time. It sounds like a neat trick, but I think it would have been less distracting if this problem had been eliminated in the editing process.

The author is from Ireland, or so he seems to imply by his moniker. Some of the vocabulary in the story also leads one to believe that the author is from the British Isles. What I am trying to get at it is that there is a good deal of slang and other terms used that most Americans are unfamiliar with. There is nothing wrong with that. It probably makes the story more attractive to some people. Personally, I struggled with the vocabulary. The struggle made the story a little less fun to read.

I enjoyed reading this story. If you have an easier time with the language then you might like this story more than I did. I have given it a Good, under Subjective Analysis.

ASSM Link(s)

 Part 1 (of 2)
Part 2 (of 2)