I was crying freely now, but you’d never have known it. Rain was pouring over my head and smattering down onto the back alley below in a million little claps that sounded like incessant applause.

Applause for what? For being a sucker? For being taken for a ride by a two-bit whore all these months? Fuck that. If I never saw her face again that would be fine with me. I turned to leave.

But wait! She had a few things of mine at her place. Things that might happened to accidentally disappear if we got into a big fight over this. I decided I would get them now, while they were busy in the bedroom.

I stepped up to the window and quietly slid it upward. Then I swung one foot in, my head and body, and then the other leg followed. I stood in Alicia’s living room dripping wet, but a little comforted by the warmth of being indoors. There was the smell of her living room though, all around me. It had a distinctive smell that made my insides ache for a time when all was right with us. There had been such a time, when we’d made love on that couch and her eyes flashed like lightning in the night as I slid myself inside her. Now it was gone. Now it was all cold, black pain, like a gangrenous wound. Now the smell was making me sick inside. I wanted to vomit. What a nice little goodbye present that would be.

She had a couple of my movies and CDs. I grabbed them from on top of the TV. She had a baseball cap of mine that she liked wearing for some reason, and my football jacket. Hmmm. Where was it? I walked around the corner and saw it hanging on the doorknob. I picked it up and went to put it on.

That’s when I noticed it wasn’t my jacket. The name on the sleeve should have said GREG, but it didn’t. In the dim light of the flickering TV I made out the letters CHUCK.

Fuckin’ bastard!

Fuckin’ bitch. Slut! FUCK!!!

My guts flipped over with renewed rage, and for a second I almost snapped. I almost ran down the hall to kick the living shit out of both of them. Two miserable fucking back-stabbers! My best friend and my girl! God damn it all to hell! I almost killed them both right then and there.

Then there was another flash of lightning and I noticed something else that belonged to me, something that would come in handy right then. Something so perfect I suddenly thought that God himself was on my side.

It was my mom’s video camera. Alicia had borrowed it to video tape her cheerleading practice. I lifted it from the small table by the back door of the apartment. There was a tape in it that said, Cheerleading #1. I turned it on. The battery indicator lit up to the maximum.

Good.

I decided right then, that I wouldn’t kill them physically. I would kill them socially. You see in my school for a girl to cheat on her boyfriend pretty much rendered her a leper among her peers, and a disease among the opposite sex, and for a guy to snake his buddy’s girl. Well that was lower than low. Our team mates would have a thing or two to say about that. All I had to do was get proof.

The school wanted rumours. They would have them.

I switched the camera into the record position and crept down the hall. The floor creaked under my feet and I froze in place several times, terrified that I would alert them to my presence. Them betraying me was despicable, but my breaking in to spy on them was even worse, at least in the eyes of the law, if they caught me in there. I moved more slowly toward that crack of light, listening to their distant giggles and sighs, timing my steps so that the creaks would be buried beneath their impassioned cries.

They had just started by the time I got there. The door was slightly ajar, just enough for me to point the camera lens into and get a good shot of Alicia’s bed. The lights were on, bright and revealing. I poked my eye to the view finder and found I could see them both vividly, in full color.

They were bare-assed naked. Chuck had just gotten between her whorishly spread thighs and was guiding the head of his cock up and down her slippery little pink slit. My heart pounded wildly, my hands were shaking a bit and I willed them to steady. I breathed deep and released it slowly.

Calm. Calm. Calm.

But Chuck glanced up toward the door and I almost ran for it. I almost bolted out of there like a scared little kid from a haunted house. His eyes just breezed around the room though, rolling in ecstasy as he slid his cock into Alicia. He took his first few strokes and buried himself into the very bottom of her, rolling his gaze up to the ceiling and closing his eyes with a stupid-looking grin on his face.

“God, you’re tight, Alicia…”

She allowed him to pump his way into her and then she pulled him down for a kiss. He fucked her like that, in the bed I myself had enjoyed her in so many times. His cock speared in and out of her. He was rougher and clumsier than I had been with her, but she seemed to like it that way. I also noticed that his cock was longer and thicker than mine. My male ego withered a bit more. Then she screamed out lustfully at him and my ego completely collapsed.

“Oh god, Chucky! Give it to me, hard. Oh yeah, baby!”

Great material. Just like a porn star.

“You like that, huh? So much better than Greg?”

“Damn rights! You blow him out of the water.”

Bitch! Slut! Goddamned accursed whore!

My hands shook a little at this and I willed myself calm again, steadying the shot.

“Fuck, yeah!” Chuck shouted in triumph, and banged away at her slick little whore hole.

I thought back to the first time I’d ever fucked her, right there on that very bed. We had been kissing and petting for a good hour, when finally she got up to go to the washroom. I followed her in there and forced my way in. I couldn’t wait anymore. I began tugging her pants down and unzipping mine. She looked at me excitedly, wondering if she should stop me, but I was too forceful for her. So she just went with it, and the next thing we knew I had her up against the bathroom door and was trying to fuck my way into her right there. She stopped me though, claiming it was too awkward, and that if we were going to go through with it, we might as well do it right. Then she took me back to her bed and I fucked her for the first time, sliding into her delicious little pussy like it was made for nothing else but to receive my cock. I fucked her for a good ten minutes, pausing to resist a premature orgasm several times, and finally pulling out to shoot my load all over her stomach. I still remember my come squirting out in thick streams that made her eyes widen.

Now Chuck was in that same place. It hurt deeply to watch the scene play out. I still loved her. I missed the thousand and one fucks we had enjoyed together, and the hundred or so times she had sucked me off when full-out sex was too risky with her mom down the hall. Now all that was gone. It was tragic. I began to wonder what I had done so wrong. Surely my jealousy wasn’t so terrible. I got upset once in a while if she was standing too close to other guys, but what the fuck? She was gorgeous and anyone of those guys would have killed to fuck her. Chuck was the only one dirty enough to go through with it though.

These were my thoughts as I watched them fuck in the little view finder of the video camera. Sure every guy would kill to have the chance to fuck her, and I suppose they would be able to now.

Eventually Chuck was ready to come. He thrust away at her, grunting and panting, mumbling stupid shit about her beautiful pussy and her jiggling tits, and she cried out for him to fuck her harder with physical movements that dragged him over the edge. His cock swirled around inside her as she eagerly fucked him back, knocking her pelvis into his in a desperate attempt to make herself come with him. Alas, he could not hold back though, and he simply whipped it out and thrust it up at her. She quickly grabbed a hold of it and began jerking his load up across her naked tits and throat. He panted and shuddered on the bed in front of her and his pelvis jerked spasmodically as though ejaculation took every ounce of strength he had... His come covered her and she received it in a sluttish display of crude verbal sentiments worthy of any porn actress. Finally she took it into her mouth and slurped it clean. Ah.

He rested his cock a bit after that while he went down on her again, bringing her to a jerky little orgasm that seemed to start and stop several times before it finally got going all the way. Then they fucked again. This time he came at her from behind. The funny thing was, he kept looking at himself in the mirror above her dresser. He was all flexing his muscles and grinning and shit. He looked like an idiot. He was an idiot.

All the while they went at it, Alicia kept on calling out these sluttish little come-ons to him. Telling him his cock was so big, and he was driving her wild and shit like that. It was really phoney. She wasn’t much of a bull-shitter. In fact I began to wonder if she was faking the whole thing after a while. What did it matter though? They were fucking. The camera work was a little bit shaky, but I got it all. He pulled out and blew another load across her ass. That was it. I quietly backed away from the bedroom door and returned to the living room. I pulled the tape out and gathered up the rest of my stuff. Then I headed for the window.

Hold on a second though! I stopped in my tracks. If I took all my stuff she would know I had been in here, and if a tape of them fucking got out, I would be busted for breaking and entering! Shit. That wouldn’t do. I had to put everything back exactly the way it was.

“Get me a towel, baby. There’s one in the hall closet by the bathroom. Get me a drink too, would ya?”

“Be right back.”

“Hurry, and I’ll suck you off again. I’m getting that hungry little feeling you love so much.”

Dammit! I had just time to throw my back against the wall in the corner by the back door before the bedroom door flung open, throwing a searchlight down the hallway toward my feet.

“There’s drinks in the fridge,” Alicia said.

Chuck turned around and looked at her. I lifted his jacket from the doorknob it hung on and pulled it up over my face.

“God, you’re sexy with cum all over you,” he said.

I sucked in breath and held it. Chuck walked out and went around the corner into the kitchen. The fridge opened and he got two can drinks out. He stopped in the hall on the way back and grabbed a towel from the closet. Then he went back into the bedroom and shut the door. I shivered violently as I let the breath out again.

I quickly replaced all my stuff to the exact same places they were in, and I climbed out the window with only one video cassette: Cheerleading #1. It got pretty wet on the way home but it was still playable, and more importantly, copyable.

I was crying all the way home, so glad it was raining.

The next day I headed over to Alicia’s house to pick up my stuff officially. Her mom answered the door looking concerned for me. I gathered she had heard about our troubles and was sad for us. She had always liked me.

“Is Alicia was home?”

Alicia came strolling out of the bedroom looking as casual as ever. I was still pretty disgusted with her, but I decided to play it cool. I would pretend to be the little lost puppy dog and beg her to take me back, just to throw off suspicion that it was me who had made the video. With any luck, Chuck himself would be blamed somehow. That would be sweet revenge.

I didn’t have to stretch myself very far to get into the role. Her eyes looked very beautiful to me for some reason, and her lips, though they’d pleasured another man’s cock the night before, looked desperately kissable. A knot tightened in my gut and swelled upward into my throat. I wanted to cry again, but didn’t. Not right away.

“Hey,” I said. “What’s up?”

“Nothing. How are you?”

“I had a pretty rough night, actually. I was worried about us.”

She took a deep breath, looking away for a moment. Her mom went around the corner into the kitchen, giving us some privacy.

“I’ve done a lot of thinking about us too, Greg. I know I said some things out of anger yesterday, but I want you to know I really do care about you. I hope we can still be friends.”

That got to me. I couldn’t believe I was hearing the “I hope we can still be friends” line from her. Though I had been betrayed I still loved her. I got a lump in my throat and nearly started crying right there. Mostly I was really angry though. I had to play it cool.

“Friends? So we really are broken up?”

She got a pained look on her face. She was squirming with guilt I suppose. Seeing me near tears made her feel like dirt I bet.

“I just can’t stay with somebody who doesn’t trust me. I’m sorry.”

Fuckin’ lying bitch! Dirty little slut-rag whore! How dare you try and pin this on me like it’s my fault! You deserve everything you’re gonna get, you cunt!

These are the thoughts that flew through my head. There was no outward sign of my inner rage however. I just stood there breathing in shaky sighs on her doorstep. Otherwise I was cool as a cucumber. I was a rock.

“So that’s it then, huh? We’re through?”

Alicia nodded.

“Well I kinda figured, I guess. I know I haven’t been the perfect boyfriend. I came over here to make some big speech and try to win you back, but it seems you’ve already made up your mind. So I won’t bother.”

“There’s not really any point. I’ve made up my mind.”

“Still it seems like an awful waste, don’t you think? To throw away everything we have together over something so small? Something we can work through. Doesn’t our love matter? Isn’t it worth it to you?”

“I just can’t be with you, Greg. You don’t trust me.”

She’d found an angle and was sticking to it, though it made her into an absolute hypocrite. She said it without even batting an eyelash though. She was a liar. It was at that moment I realized once and for all that she wasn’t worth hurting over. What had mom said? If she doesn’t accept me for who I am, she’s not worth the trouble. Something like that. I supposed she was right.

The funny thing was, something died in me at that moment. It was the last of my childhood innocence I think. The part of me that believed in dreams, and wished on stars, and thought that love always conquered in the end. I think all that died right there. As the last flicker on the candle of hope for Alicia and I was snuffed out, all of that disappeared with it. I haven’t been the same since. I learned that day that sometimes love doesn’t conquer all, and sometimes dreams do die, and wishes don’t always come true. It was a hard lesson to learn. I think part of the pain I was feeling was just knowing that those things had died inside me and would never return. I hated Alicia for that.

“Can I at least get one kiss before I go?”

I didn’t want to kiss her. I was disgusted by her. I don’t even know if she’d rinsed her mouth out since she swallowed Chuck’s load last night. I had to play the role though.

She leaned in to kiss me, and I turned away.

“I can’t. It’ll break my heart. I just gotta go.”

“Greg,” she said. Her voice sounded sad now, as though she were beginning to wonder if she’d made a mistake. I had never refused to kiss her since I’d known her.

“You’ve made up your mind. I’ll let you go. But I just wanted you to know I’m sorry for everything I ever did. I’m sorry for not trusting you. I’m sorry for being a jerk. I’m sorry for everything.”

I wasn’t sorry though. Not at all. I was just rubbing salt in her wound. She stood there with her eyes cast down to the floor, struggling with guilt and shame. She knew I didn’t deserve the pain I was in. I was glad to see my speech was making her feel awful. She deserved it.

“I’m sorry too, I guess,” she responded.

Sure you are. You were so sorry to have Chuck’s come sprayed across your tits. You were so sorry to swallow his load, and have your cunt licked all over the place by him. Sorry my ass.

“Can I get my stuff?”

Alicia gathered up my stuff and handed it to me. She even grabbed the camera and placed it on the pile in my arms.

“I hope everything’s here. I think we may have had a break-in last night.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah, I came out of the bedroom and there was water all over the floor. Someone had climbed in the window out of the rain I think and just walked around in here. I don’t think anything was stolen but whoever it was sure made a mess.”

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah. I haven’t told mom about it though. She would probably freak out. I’m just glad I didn’t walk out here while the guy was still in here. I might have been raped or something.”

I almost told her that Chuck would have protected her, but I stopped myself at the last second. Instead I simply muttered, “Yeah. That would have been awful.”

“Well, that’s it I guess. Oh, wait! Hold on. My tape is still in here.”

She popped the camera open but it was empty.

“What tape?”

“Mom, did you take the cheerleading tape out of Greg’s camera?”

“No. I wouldn’t know how.”

“Oh well. I’m sure it’s around here somewhere.”

“So this is goodbye then?”

“Well we’re still friends aren’t we? We’ll see each other around school and at games and stuff.”

“I guess. It’s still goodbye to us, though. Once I walk out of here we’re over for good.”

“Don’t say that. It’ll be okay.”

“It’ll be okay for you. This was your choice. Not mine.”

“It won’t be okay for me, Greg. You think I’m enjoying this or something?”

She sure seemed to be enjoying it last night.

“I don’t know. What does it matter? It’s over. It’s just over.”

 “Are you mad?”

“What difference does it make?”

She didn’t have an answer.

“I’ll call you,” she said sadly. A tear spilled down my cheek, finally.

“No you won’t. It’s over.”

Then I left.

›