Johnny Kape

Love Needs Learning

Chapter 1

Fu walked into the guardroom and greeted me.

"Good evening, Mai. Was everything okay today?" asked Fu.

"Well, nothing special," I said, giving him the job record notebook. He took a look at the records, nodded, and closed the book.

"Okay. Now you can go patrolling. Just follow the way I taught you yesterday. From the highest floor, then down to every floor. You can go home if everything is okay."

I stood up, and took my cap. "I'm going now."

Fu sat down and nodded to me. I walked toward the elevator.

It was my second day on duty. It was a hard time to get a job, and I didn't have any outstanding skill. In the university, I majored in history and literature, which gave me no advantage to find a job. Fortunately, I had a good, strong body, and someone introduced me to a security service company to be a guard. I was trained for two months, and then was assigned to a community composed of four tall buildings. The building I was in had 15 floors, with six large, expensive apartments on each.

I took the elevator to the 15th floor. I started to patrol everywhere.

I walked along the aisle, which, at that time, was dark. Only a small lamp was lit. Though it was midnight, it was still very hot. I walked and wiped at my sweat.

Nothing special. I walked to the stairs and was ready to go down to the 14th floor. I turned my head back to look one last time. However, that time something caught my eye.

I don't know why, but there was something wrong.

I walked back to a metal door. Outside the door was the stairs up to the roof. I felt wind blowing. I looked at the door. Then I realized that the door was not locked. Someone had opened the door.

I opened the door, and walked up to the roof. I shouted, "Anyone there?"

No response. I shouted again, "Anyone there?"

That time I heard somebody moaning. I tried to find where the sound came from. Then I saw my target. A fat boy, about ten years old, with a short T-shirt and shorts, was lying on the floor, moaning.

I ran there and asked, "Are you okay?"

I looked at the boy, and was shocked. There was a small knife in the right hand of the boy, and his left wrist was bleeding; bleeding a lot!

I called Fu on the radio. "Fu, Fu, someone tried to commit suicide by slashing his wrists on the roof. He is still awake. Call the ambulance!"

"Roger," answered Fu. The boy's wrist was still bleeding. I looked around, and started to take off my shirt. Then I took off my undershirt too and used my undershirt to bandage and press the boy's wrist.

Fu's voice came again from the radio.

"Mai, Mai, do you know who tried to commit suicide there?"

"A fat boy, about 10 years old. He is still bleeding."

"He must be the Don boy. Find something to press his wound. Press hard! The harder the better!"

"Yes, I'm pressing."

"Raise his hand higher than his head."

"Can I carry him to the first floor?"

"Press for at least 5 minutes, and see if the bleeding stops or slows. If you want to carry him, remember to keep his hands higher than his head, and notice his bleeding."

"I see."

I pressed the boy's wound very hard, and raised his hand.

The boy was murmuring, "Don't… save me… "

"You little fool. Why did you try to commit suicide? You are so young, and the world is still wonderful," I said softly.

"You… don't understand… "

"No, I don't understand. Since I'm here, I must save you."

The boy didn't talk any more, just gasped weakly. I was still pressing his wrist.

After three minutes, I talked to the radio, "Fu, Fu, hasn't the ambulance arrived?"

"Not yet."

"Want me to carry him down?"

"Can you? I've put the elevator on the 15th floor."

"I'll try."

I tried to carry him with one hand, and with the other hand kept pressing his wrist hard.

Well, hmm, he was a bit overweight. All right, he was a bit TOO overweight. It was so difficult. I carried him carefully. I was out of breath, but I walked to the stairs as fast as possible.

Finally, I got the boy down the stairs and to the elevator. Fortunately the elevator had not been called by someone else so we entered the elevator and went down to the first floor.

When the door opened, Fu was there. He helped me to carry the boy out of the elevator, and asked me, "Why are you shirtless? Where are your clothes?"

"On the roof. I thought it would be better to bandage and press the wound with my undershirt. It's softer."

Fu nodded. "I'll press it for you. Now go get your clothes."

He pressed the boy's wrist, and I went to the roof again to get my shirt. When I got back to the first floor, the ambulance had arrived.

A young doctor simply bandaged the boy, and some staff placed the boy in the ambulance. The doctor asked, "Aren't his parents home?"

"No," said Fu. "He lives with his father only, and his father is not home. I just called his home, nobody answered. I also tried his father's cell phone, but haven't contacted him yet."

"Who found the boy?"

"I found him." I raised my hand.

"Could you please go with the boy to the hospital?" said the doctor.

I nodded. Fu rushed to the guard room, wrote something hastily, and tore off the note paper. He gave me the paper.

"It's his father's cell phone number. The police or the hospital staff will need to call his father."

I jumped into the ambulance, and went to the hospital with them. The boy was sent to the operating room. I sat on a chair outside. I felt pooped. My heart was still beating crazily.

A young policeman asked me to go with him. I followed him to another room. He asked me the details about how I found the boy.

I told him everything I knew. Then I signed my statement, still with a shaking hand.

"All right, you can go home now," the policeman said after I signed my name.

"How about the boy?"

"We are trying to contact his parents. He will survive, I believe. Thank you for your help."

I walked out of the room, and stared at the operating room for a while. Then I walked out of the emergency room with a heavy heart.

Chapter 2

I walked a long way from the hospital back to the building where I worked to get my motorcycle. Fu saw me, and he ran out of the guard room.

"How about the boy?" he asked.

"I don't know. The police said that he would survive."

"You must be exhausted. Now go home and sleep. Be careful on your way home." he patted my shoulder.

I went back to the studio apartment I rented, lay down on my bed without taking off my clothes and fell asleep almost immediately. When I got up it was about noon.

While taking only toast as my brunch, I kept thinking about the boy. The remaining duties all that week were at night, which would start at 12 o'clock midnight. I decided to go to see the boy in the evening, before going to work.

I had nothing to do. I had no money to buy a computer, or even a TV. I turned on my CD Walkman to listen to some classical music. I selected a book to read. I flipped through the book back and forth, but couldn't concentrate on it. The words in the book became a lot of nonsensical symbols to me. The music was just going into my right ear and escaping out from my left ear. However, the boy's hand, drenched with blood, kept showing up in front of my mind's eyes.

I decided to go out jogging. I put on a T-shirt and shorts, and jogged along the street. It was lunchtime, and there were many small boys and girls who had just ended their day at school, walking and playing in the street. I slowed down and watched them playing and laughing. However, soon the boy's painful face came back again into my mind. I almost screamed, but did my best to hold it back. I started jogging again. I ran away from the street, toward the outskirts, and almost ran to the small fishing port beside the city.

I walked back toward my apartment slowly, and was surprised that I had jogged for such a long way. When I got home, it was almost 5 o'clock. I took a shower and then I rode my motorcycle to the hospital.

It was a big hospital. The night before I got there with the ambulance and stayed at the emergency room only. Today I had come there again, alone, and found that the whole hospital was just like a labyrinth. I spent quite some time just trying to find where the information desk was. When I was about to ask where the boy's ward was, I found that I didn't even know the boy's name.

I was standing there without knowing what to do. Then I screwed up my courage to ask the girl sitting at the desk.

"Excuse me, I want to find a boy, who was sent to this hospital last night."

"What is his name?"

"Uh… I don't know. I just know that his last name is Don. About ten years old."

The girl looked at me interestingly. "Do you know why he was sent here?"

"He slashed his wrist last night."

The girl nodded. "The surgical ward is on the 6th floor. You can ask there."

I thanked her. It took me some more time to find the elevator. Finally I came to the surgical ward.

When I had just stepped into the surgical ward, I heard a man roaring.

"Shit! Do you know how old you are? Do you think it very funny, huh? Do you know how much you made me ashamed of you?"

I stopped there to see what was happening. A middle-aged man, in a full business suit, ran out of a room furiously. He passed me without taking a glance at me.

I watched his back. He ran so fast that he disappeared immediately. Then I turned back and went to the nursing station. A nurse raised her head to look at me.

"Excuse me, I want to see the boy who slashed his wrist and was sent here hospital last night. His last name is Don."

The nurse watched me for a while and asked, "Who are you? What's your relation to the boy?"

"Well, hmm, my last name is Mai, and I came with him here last night."

"Oh," the nurse nodded. "he just woke up. But…"

"But what?"

The nurse pointed to the room which the furious man just ran out of. "You saw that, I suppose."

I stuck my tongue out. "Is the man his daddy?"

The nurse nodded, and sighed deeply. "Yeah, and it's his third time to try to commit suicide."

"The third time?" This time I didn't need to stick my tongue out, because my chin had dropped to my chest. "Why?"

"Well, actually he is a good and cute boy, but his father puts a lot of pressure on him."

"How about his mom?"

"His mom passed away because of complications when giving birth to him. That's probably one of the reasons why his dad was mean to him."

"Oh."

"Go and see him. Give him some support and comfort. He is a lonely boy, and he doesn't have many relatives and friends. It's good that you have come to see him."

I nodded, and walked into the room. It was a small single room. A small sofa and a small refrigerator were put against the wall. A TV was hanging on the wall. The boy was lying on the bed. His left wrist was bandaged, and his right hand was connected to what must have been an intravenous feed. His eyes were closed, but tears were still escaping from his closed eyes.

I took a chair and sat beside him. "Are you okay?" I asked softly.

The boy didn't answer me. His eyes were still closed.

"You may not know me. I found you on the roof last night."

The boy opened his eyes. He looked at me. In his eyes, I saw a bit of hatred and a lot of sorrow.

"Hmm… how do you feel now?" I didn't know what to say, so I could only ask some stupid questions.

The boy still didn't answer me immediately. He looked at me sadly. After a long pause, he finally said, "Why… why did you save me?"

"Why did I save you?" I scratched my head. "Well, I just found you when patrolling. If I hadn't saved you, I would have never forgiven myself all my life."

The boy closed his eyes again. Another tear flowed from his eye to the pillow.

"What on earth happened? What made you give up your hope? The nurse told me that it's not your first time to try to commit suicide." I asked, still softly. No answer.

"Do you really feel so sad? Is there any problem that you couldn't solve?"

Still no answer. Another long pause, then he said with his tiny voice, "You don't understand… Nobody will…"

I looked at him compassionately, then I patted his head. "All right. Don't think that much, okay? Have a good sleep. I'm the guard of your building. You can come to talk to me any time, when you feel depressed."

The boy still didn't answer.

I stood up, and said, "I have to go. I'm on night duty today, and I have to go home to prepare for it. I'll come back to see you tomorrow morning when I'm off duty. Okay?"

I waited there for nearly a minute, and the boy opened his eyes finally. He looked at me, and nodded slightly. I closed the door as I left his room.

Chapter 3

At 8:00 am, I transferred the job record notebook to Wang, who was the next guard on duty, and started my patrolling job. After everything was done, I decided to go home first, before visiting the boy at the hospital. I took a shower, and ate something for breakfast. I pulled my old paper box out of the bottom of my bed, and picked some old comics and novels which I liked the most, but hadn't touched for a long time. I thought for a while, and took my CD Walkman with me. I also picked some classical music CDs. I put everything into a backpack, and then rode my motorcycle to the hospital.

I took the elevator to the 6th floor, and walked into the surgical ward. I stood in front of the boy's room. The door was open. I peeked inside the room. I was actually afraid to meet his mean father again. Phew! Only the boy was there.

I walked into his room. The boy was not sleeping. He just watched the ceiling and seemed not to care about anything any more.

"Hello, here I am." I smiled.

The boy looked at me.

"I brought you something." I took a chair and sat beside him.

The boy sat up, and looked at my backpack. I took my CD Walkman out.

"If you feel bored, you can listen to some music. But… I found that I only had some classical music CDs. I don't have any pop music. Would it be too boring for you?"

The boy shook his head, and gave me a smile. His smile made me feel relieved.

"You have a wonderful smile," I said. "Oh, I still don't know what your name is."

I looked at the card on the wall. "Don, Ming-Jun. Well, good name. Do you have any nickname?"

The boy shrugged. "Well, my nicknames were quite fixed. Fattie, piggy, porker, boar, or their combinations like fat pig or something similar."

I shook my head. "Not good nicknames. Do you have an English name?"

"Fred."

"Good, let me call you Fred. Okay?"

Fred did not respond. I took the old comic books out.

"Here are some comic books, but they are very old ones. I don't know if you like them or not. If not, I'll take them back home."

Fred's smile was bigger. "You like them too?"

"Oh, a long, long time ago. I loved these comic books, but they had been in my paper box for a very long time. This morning I took them out of the box. Do you want me to leave them with you?"

Fred nodded.

"Here are some more novels. They were my favorite ones in my childhood," I said. "Sometimes I still read them, to recall my childhood."

A short silence. Then Fred asked, "Did you have a happy childhood?"

"Did I have a happy childhood?" I scratched my head. "Good question. I don't know how to answer it. Hmm… When I was a boy, my father worked very hard to raise me, but we were not rich, just okay. My grades were not good, but I read a lot of extracurricular books, novels, and of course, comic books. My father was very strict with me, and I was punished very often too. Well, my childhood was quite normal, I guess."

"Oh." Fred didn't speak anymore.

I asked him carefully, "Are you very unhappy?"

Fred didn't answer me.

I gave up. "All right, you don't need to tell me if you don't want to. Do you want to listen to some music or watch TV?"

Still no response.

After nearly one minute, Fred finally said, "I think that I have never been happy."

"Have never been happy?" I was surprised.

Fred shook his head and said, "No, never."

"How come?"

Fred shrugged. "Nobody cared about me."

"Well, hmm, your father looked mean, I agree. But how about your mom… Oh."

The nurse's words suddenly called to my mind. His mother died because of complications giving birth to Fred. I scratched my head. "Sorry, I shouldn't have talked about this."

"That's okay." Fred shrugged again.

"Who took care of you when you were a baby?"

"My aunt. She passed away too."

Why did I always touch his tender spot? I was a bit angry with myself. "Then you should have some good friends, right?"

"They treat me like a friend only when they need someone to paint a poster, or when they have questions on their homework."

Hey, what was I trying to do, pour more oil on the fire? I wish I could kick myself.

"So it seems that you are very good at painting." This topic should be a lot safer!

When I spoke of painting, Fred's eyes gleamed with amusement, but the shine vanished very soon. He shrugged. "So so."

Come on, would this topic hurt him too?

"Why, you didn't look very happy speaking about painting."

"Well, my daddy doesn't like me to paint."

"Why?"

Fred shrugged again. "He feels that painting won't help me with my future."

I felt that I started to understand why Fred had tried to commit suicide three times. I sighed deeply.

"All right, I surrender. I just want to find something happy for you to recall, to make you happier. I give up." I raised my both hands, making a gesture of surrender.

Fred laughed. I sighed with relief. I finally made him laugh. I was so proud of myself. Hey, I'm so good a babysitter, huh?

All of a sudden, tears dropped onto Fred's face. He started to weep.

I was thrown into a panic. My pride was all gone in a nanosecond.

"Hey, what's wrong? Don't cry. Did I say anything wrong?"

Fred didn't answer me, but was still crying. I didn't know what to do. I patted his head, and wiped the tears from his face.

"If I hurt you, or said anything wrong, I apologise. I'm sorry, okay? Don't cry. If your daddy came in now, he might kill me and throw me out of the window."

Fred laughed despite his tears again. I took some tissues to wipe his face. He was still sobbing, and after a while, he said, "He doesn't care about me at all."

"All right, all right. Stop crying, okay? Did I say something wrong?"

Fred shook his head. He seemed to have calmed down a bit. "I just thought that, I don't remember the last time I laughed. Suddenly I felt so sad, so I started to cry."

"You almost scared me to death." I patted my own chest heavily, with a 'phew'. Looking at my action, Fred laughed again.

"Actually, you have wonderful laughter. Don't think those sad things any more, okay? Smile, my good boy."

Fred lowered his head without replying.

"Well." I patted his shoulder. "I'm one of the guards in your building. I was on duty the whole night, and now I have to go home to sleep. You can keep these comic books, novels and CDs. You can give them back to me when you are out of the hospital, or any time you like. Okay?"

"Yeah, thanks."

I stood up, and gave Fred a smile. Fred looked at me. Tears were still on his face, but he seemed like he didn't want me to leave. I walked out of the ward. The nurse I met yesterday nodded to me, and gave me a sweet smile.

Chapter 4

I went back to my own apartment and had a good sleep, and then went to my job at 8 o'clock in the evening.

It was not a peaceful night, however. A couple on the fourth floor started to argue. They argued so loudly that all people in the building knew that the husband had been operated on for his piles, and the wife bought a lot of Louis Vuitton bags. Someone called me to complain and protest and I tried to call the couple's home telephone and their cell phones, but nobody answered. I had no choice but to call the police.

Their arguing finally stopped. However, at dawn a clamorous drunk man tired to get in. He hit our gate crazily and again I had no choice but to call the police. The police came to try catching him, and I went out to help the police. In this total mess my chin was hit by the drunk's fist. Finally the drunk man was arrested and I went to the police station to make the deposition after transferring my work duty. When everything was done, it was almost ten o'clock in the morning.

I went home to take a bath and rode my motorcycle to the hospital to see Fred. I walked to the ward, but then I found that the ward was empty.

"He left the hospital this morning," another nurse saw me and told me.

"Left the hospital? This morning? Just two days?"

"Yes. His father came here very early to handle the procedures and put everything in their bags. Soon he took the boy home."

"Oh."

Well, I had no reason to stay any more, so I thanked her and went back home to sleep.

Though I was concerned about Fred's conditions, my duties the rest of the week were all night duty, so I got no chance to see Fred again. Well, sometimes I could see his mean father at midnight and in the early morning. He always said nothing when passing in front of me, not even a greeting, just lowered his head and left quickly.

I finally got my first day off. I got up at noon, and then went to a bookstore after my brunch. I read books all afternoon there.

When I was about to finish my third book, I felt someone push me. My eyes left the book and I saw Fred in his school uniform smiling at me.

"Hey, Fred! Are you done with school for the day?" I put the book down and greeted to him.

"Yeah," said Fred. "I came here to buy pens and saw you standing here."

"How have you been recently? Is everything okay?"

Fred shrugged. "So so."

"I had night duties the whole week and couldn't see you. This is my first day off and I came here to read books. I didn't expect that I would be caught by you here." I smiled.

"Do you often come here to read books?"

"Yeah, because I'm poor, I can only read free books here."

Fred took a look at what I was reading.

"Do you like to read books about history?"

"Oh, yes. I majored in history and literature in college. However, it gave me no skills to help me find a job, so I had no choice but to be a security guard."

"It's a good job being a security guard, too."

I smiled. Fred was such a kind boy.

"I mean it," said Fred. "You have a very good body shape. Not like me…" He blushed.

It was the first time I took a look at this boy seriously.

Well, there was only one word to describe Fred: round. He had a pair of round eyes, a round face, and a round body. His uniform did not quite fit on his body, and his breasts bulged a bit due to the fat.

"Why, you look lovely, too." I said.

Fred watched me. He seemed to feel that I was actually mocking him using the word 'lovely'. I patted his shoulder.

"I mean it. And actually, you don't need to mind how others look at you. Oh, from tomorrow, I will be on evening duty for a week, from four pm to twelve. You can come to talk with me after school."

Fred laughed and nodded.

"Do you want me to take you home? My motorcycle is out there."

"Sure," Fred agreed happily.

I put the book back on the shelf, and walked out with Fred. I straddled my motorcycle and Fred climbed up and sat behind me. His arms wrapped around my waist.

"I don't want to go home now. Can we go somewhere to walk?" Fred asked.

"Really? Why don't you want to go home now?"

"Well, it's boring because nobody is home."

"Maybe you can go home first to change your clothes, then we can see where we want to go," I suggested.

"Okay," Fred agreed.

I took him back to his home. He ran into the building and came out after a few minutes. He had changed to a T-shirt and shorts, which made his body look even more round.

"Where do you want to go?" I asked.

"Anywhere you like."

I thought for a while. "Okay, sit tight. I'll take you to a great place."

Fred's arms wrapped around my waist again. I felt his head leaning against my back.

I rode for about ten minutes and took him to the fishing port. It was a small fishing port, which had only a building with an office and a market inside. However, outside the building was a beautiful park. I didn't take Fred to walk in the park, but instead I took him to walk on the embankment. We walked for a while and I sat down on the ground. Fred sat beside me.

The sun was just a bit above the horizon. The sea wind was not hard, but very comfortable.

"I like to come here to see the sea when I'm feeling depressed or pent-up," I said.

I looked at Fred. He looked at the sea and some fishing boats and he was spellbound. We kept silent for a while, then he started to speak.

"I still don't know your name."

"My last name is Mai. But you can call me Eric. It's my English name."

"Okay, hmm, Eric. Can we…" he stopped.

"Can we what?"

"Can we… Can we be brothers?" Fred screwed up his courage and finally said, "I always wished to have an elder brother."

I smiled at him. "Sure, I don't have brothers and sisters either. Now we are brothers."

"Oh, really? Are you an only child too?" Fred was a bit surprised.

"Yeah, just like you, I'm also the only child and my mother died when I was about five years old. So I was lonely too and had a lot of pressure from my father."

Fred looked at me, and I went on while looking at the sea.

"My father always hoped I would have good grades to enter a good senior high school and university so I could be a doctor. However, I wasn't smart and I liked to read a lot of extracurricular books. I was always beaten up when my father saw my grades."

"Then, how about now?"

"Well, now I sit with my new brother here." I smiled, and Fred laughed. "I rent an apartment and work here. My father gave up his hope for me being a doctor now. He just kept whining about why I didn't have a girlfriend and marry."

"Don't you have any girlfriend? You look so good that I think you should have a lot of girlfriends."

I shook my head. "No. I guess that no girls would like a poor guy. I have to work to feed myself first and have no time to think about that."

Fred turned his head back to look out at the sea. After a few seconds, he said, "Me either. No girls would like a fat pig like me."

I frowned. "Why do you curse yourself like this?"

"I'm just talking the truth."

I looked at Fred, and his stubborn eyes looked at me, too. However, tears started to fall down from his eyes.

I looked at his depressed face compassionately. I held his face with both my hands. "You do mind that you are fat, don't you?"

Fred hesitated for a few seconds, then he nodded.

"You don't need to be like this at all," I said. "In my point of view, you are a great boy. Do you know? The nurse in the hospital thinks so, too. She feels that you are actually a very good boy, but your father put too much pressure on you. She hoped that I would have more talks with you, to relieve your pressure. So, look, there are actually people caring about you, right?"

Fred raised his head and looked at me. His tearing face looked surprised.

"I agree to be your brother. However, I hope that my brother won't be like this, okay?"

Fred lowered his head again. Then he nodded slightly.

I swiped at the tears on his face. Then, I didn't know where my courage came from; I kissed his cheek slightly. Fred looked at me and blushed.

"If you go home after school and I am on duty, you can come to the guard room to talk to me. You can tell me all your worries. Okay?"

Fred didn't answer me, just looked out at the sea. Then he leaned his head against my shoulder. I hugged him slightly, and watched the sea too.

Chapter 5

Since that day, Fred and I became very good friends. No, we became brothers. Fred became more active, at least in front of me. He liked to chat with me. When I was on my night duty, he would come to chat with me at night, until I told him to go home to sleep. He would also get up early, put on his school uniform, take his school bag, and come to the guard room in the early morning. When I was on my evening duty, he was even happier, because he could see me after school. He would go home to change his clothes, and take his homework to the guard room to do with me. Only when I was on my day duty, we would not meet, because, by the time I came to the building, he was already in school, and when he was finished school, I had already left.

On my day off, I always spent my afternoon in the bookstore, and Fred would come to the bookstore to find me after school. Then I would take him to the park or the fishing port. We'd walk and talk there.

One such day, we were sitting on the embankment, watching the sea. He told me that his least favorite subject was physical education, because he was not good at exercise. Swimming class was especially his painful time, because his classmates would laugh at his fat body and his plump breasts. He also told me that his grades were very good, but many classmates disliked him.

"Why do they dislike you?" I asked.

Fred shrugged. "Maybe they think I'm the teacher's pet, and an informer."

"Informer?" I raised my eyebrows. "Are you?"

Fred shook his head. After a while, he said, "Only one or two times, I felt that someone's tricks were too cruel."

"How bad?"

"One time I saw a boy in my class pour a lot of glue on a girl's chair, then she sat down before I warned her. Her skirt was all in a mess. She cried, and the teacher asked who did that. Nobody dared to tell our teacher, so I told her."

"Then?"

"Then…" Fred lowered his head. "The second day, it was my turn to have a lot of glue on my chair and my pants."

"Oops, did the teacher punish him?"

"Yes, but so what? He is still tricking everyone like that."

"Then?"

"Then, he pulled tricks on me even more, even with guys in my group."

"How did he trick you?"

"Once our teacher asked me to go out to take something for her. It took a long time, and when I came back to the classroom, everyone had already written the homework list out in their own contact book. I didn't know what our homework was, so a guy in our group told me that he could tell me what our homework was. I thanked him, and wrote down the homework list. However, the next day, I gave my homework to my teacher. She told me that it wasn't the homework she assigned, and she asked me why I did it. Then I knew that the homework on the list my classmate told me was all fake. Thanks to him, I also didn't bring anything we should have brought to class."

Fred stopped. Thinking of this unhappy memory, his tears started to fall. I frowned.

"Didn't the teacher talk to your daddy?"

Fred wiped at his tears, and became angry again. "My daddy? He didn't care about that at all. He only thought about his company. He signs my contact book without taking a look at what the teacher wrote. He never attends any parents-teacher conferences."

I hugged him. "You must be lonely at home and had no one to talk when they tricked you like that."

Fred nodded and leaned his head against my shoulder.

I squeezed his shoulder slightly and said, "Do you feel better after telling me about all these things?"

Fred didn't answer me. After a while, he raised his head and said, "Eric, do you want to come to my home? You'd never come. Right?"

"If your daddy sees me in your home, will he be angry?"

"He won't be home until midnight," said Fred. "I seldom see him. When he is home with me, he is always yelling at me about a lot of things."

"So are you often at home alone?"

"Yeah, except for my piano class."

"Piano class, wow," I said. "How about your dinner? Do you make dinner for yourself?"

"Mostly I'll buy McDonald's or KFC."

No wonder he has become fat, I thought. However, I didn't say that, to avoid irritating him.

"Do you have a kitchen? And pots?"

"Sure. But we seldom use them."

"Then, let's buy something in the supermarket and let me cook dinner for you. Okay?"

Fred jumped up. "Hurray!"

We got up and walked to my motorcycle. He held my hand slightly. I looked at him and he gave me a smile. I held his hand tighter, to assure him.

I straddled my motorcycle, and he climbed up and sat behind me. Again he wrapped my waist with his arms, tightly. I took him to the supermarket nearby and bought some vegetables, cans of different foods, and noodles.

"I often cooked meals myself when I was in the university," I said. "Actually, I can only cook some simple meals. I think that you seldom eat vegetables, right?"

Fred nodded.

"Then we can eat more tonight."

I paid for what we bought and took Fred to his home. Fu was on duty. I greeted to him.

"Mai, you should be off today, right?"

I nodded. "Yeah, Fred invited me to his home."

Fu smiled at Fred. "Have a good time."

We took the elevator to the 6th floor. Fred led me into his home.

I exclaimed when entering his home, "Wow…"

It was a big apartment. The gate faced an aisle, and split the apartment into two parts. One part was their living room, and in another part a dining table and some chairs were there. Their living room was very big, maybe twice the space as my own studio apartment. The sunlight lit the whole living room through the French casement windows, and made the whole space look very bright and clean. A sofa, a loveseat and a short cabinet made a conversation area, with a small table in the center. There were many decorations on the short cabinet. A very large LCD TV was hanging on the wall. To sum up, the whole living room was simple and very clean, but the furniture and decorations were all expensive, top-class.

"Your home is so large," I said.

"But it is very hot in the afternoon," said Fred. He turned on the air conditioner with the remote controller, then he started to take off his T-shirt. However, about halfway, he seemed to recall that I was still there, so he stopped his action. He put his T-shirt on again, and watched me as his face blushed.

"Oops… hmm… it would be… very hot here, so… so I would always…" Fred murmured to explain his action.

I gave him a smile. "It's your home! You can take it off if you like. That's okay. I won't laugh at you."

Fred watched me. I could see that he was hesitating. After a long pause, he started to believe that I wouldn't laugh at him, so he screwed up his courage and took off his T-shirt again, to reveal his body.

His body was white and apparently a bit too fat. His belly was round, but not as big as I thought. Both of his breasts were bulging and his two nipples were a bit bigger than a normal boy's.

He still watched me. In his eyes I could see that he was still worrying whether I would laugh at him or not.

I hugged his neck with both my arms, to assure him. Then I said, "Don't worry. I won't laugh at you. Do you want to tell me where your kitchen and pots are and do your homework while I cook our dinner?"

Fred became happy. He nodded, and took me to their kitchen. The kitchen was not large, but the equipment was also the best. They didn't use a gas stove, but an electric one. Their refrigerator was large. I opened the refrigerator. Inside it was only some juice, a bottle of milk, some eggs and toast.

"Do you cook yourself?" I asked.

Fred shook his head.

"Do you always only drink juice?"

"Yeah."

"How about your breakfast?"

"Sometimes I'd eat toast and eggs, and sometimes I just bought from McDonald's."

I sighed. He really needed someone to take care of his life.

"Okay. I'll cook our dinner, to give you something different. Where are your pots and bowls?"

Fred took the pots and bowls out from a cabinet. I nodded to him, and started to take everything we bought out from the bag. "Now go do your homework."

Fred nodded and left the kitchen. I started to wash the vegetables we bought, to prepare to cook our dinner.

Chapter 6

I cooked a pot of noodles, with a lot of vegetables in it. Actually I just mixed almost all the food cans and vegetables into the noodles. I put the pot on the dining table and put the bowls and chopsticks on the table. Then I called Fred.

"Fred, are you done with your homework? Our dinner is ready," I shouted.

"Okay," Fred answered from his room. He appeared a minute later, wearing only his boxer underwear.

I smiled, "Do you always only wear underwear at home?"

Fred nodded, and blushed again. "Well, I'm usually alone at home, so… sometimes I even…"

Fred stopped. But I could guess, no, I was almost sure what was after the "even…", so I didn't ask more. I just grinned, and changed the topic.

"Your apartment is really clean. Do you do most of the housekeeping?"

"No," said Fred. "A woman comes here to clean for us twice or three times a week. I clean my own room only, because I don't like others to enter my room."

"Oh." I recalled that. Yes, there was a woman who would want to go to Fred's home in the morning, or sometimes in the afternoon. "Doesn't your dad ask her to prepare dinner for you?"

Fred shook his head. "He doesn't care about that at all."

"Okay." I was afraid to make him unhappy again, so I ended that topic. "Now let's have our dinner."

"It smells so good."

"Just a simple meal," I scratched my head, and said embarrassedly. "Actually, I don't cook well. I cook only because it's a lot cheaper than to eat outside every day."

"Simple, but very delicious." Fred had already started to wolf down his first bowl of the noodles.

"Don't hurry."

I also filled a bowl of noodles for me, and ate it while looking at Fred eating happily. Soon we finished the whole pot of noodles.

"It was so great. I haven't eaten something like this for a long time," said Fred.

I smiled at him and started to clean the table. Fred came to the kitchen to help me wash the pots and bowls. We put everything back to their positions and put the kitchen waste into a bag.

When everything was done, Fred said, "I need to practice playing piano. Do you want to come to my room?"

"Sure. I'd like to listen to your performance."

Fred led me to his room. I exclaimed again. "Wow."

His room was square, even larger than the living room. A king-sized bed was in the center, along the wall. Beside the bed were his desk and computer. His homework was still on the desk. On the left wall there was a large cabinet. Beside the cabinet was a door. I thought that inside the door there should be a bathroom. A big window was facing the bed, with curtains. A piano was on the left side of the window, and a big shelf was on the right side. The whole room was clean, not as messy as a normal boy's room. Well, not as messy as mine.

"Your room is so large," I said in envy. "In my childhood, my home was not bigger than your room."

"But it's very boring to be alone," said Fred. "Do you want to listen to me playing piano?"

"Sure."

Fred closed the door of his room. He walked to the piano, opened the lid and removed the red flannelette on the piano keys. His hands slid through the keys and the clear sound rang out from the piano.

I sat on Fred's bed. His bed was quite good and very comfortable. Fred took out a music score from the piano bench, and sat in front of the piano. Soon he started playing.

He only just started his first bar of this music and I already knew that he was playing Bach's Invention No. 8. It was not an easy one, but Fred played it very fluently. To be honest, the music was so wonderful, but it was played by a nearly naked fat 10-year-old boy. The scene and the music were not quite matched.

Well, there were a few defects. Fred stuck his tongue out, but kept playing. After the whole piece was done, I applauded him.

"Hey, you played so well. Bach's songs are not easy, and this one is not an easy one among them," I said.

"Do you know it's Bach's music? Can you play piano, too?" asked Fred.

I scratched my head. "Well, I learned a little before. But we had no money to buy a piano, so I could only learn and practice at school. I can't play as good as you. However, I like classical music very much, so I know that it's Bach's Invention No. 8. Can you play more music please? You played so beautifully.

Fred was happy. He took another music score book. I stood up and walked to the piano and saw the cover of the book. It was The Sonatina I.

"Wow, your level of piano playing is quite high. Sonatina!"

Fred blushed. He found the piece he wanted to play. I took a look at it. It was Mozart's Piano Sonata No.15, K.545, the first movement.

I exclaimed again, "Hey, it's not an easy one either!"

Fred smiled at me, and started to play. I closed my eyes and concentrated on listening to his performance. I was quite surprised at Fred's skill level at playing the piano. The wonderful music flowed out from his fingers. Every note was quite clear and he controlled his strength very well. Especially in the middle of this song, the key signature changed, but it didn't trouble Fred at all.

Fred ended his performance. I still stood there with my eyes closed, to let the music continue playing in my mind. After a while, I opened my eyes and Fred was looking at me. He seemed to wait for my comments. I didn't talk, just gave him a 'thumb's up'.

Fred gave me a big smile. He turned back to the piano and started practicing again. I started to browse his room. I walked to his bookshelf. On his shelf there were many books, mostly about science, astronomy, geography, and all kind of academic subjects. However, most of the books looked quite new. It seemed that he didn't read them too often.

Fred was still playing and I walked to his desk. There was a small shelf above his desk, too. What caught my eyes was a book, which was lying on the shelf. It looked so familiar. I pulled it out from the shelf. Yes, it was the book about history, which I was reading when I met Fred in the bookstore the first time.

I looked at the book full of doubt. Then I looked at Fred.

Fred had stopped his practice. He looked at me too, and said after a while, "I saw that you were reading that book, so I bought it to see what you were reading."

"Are you interested in history, too?"

Fred blushed. He lowered his head. After a minute, some words started to escape from his mouth slowly, "No, I just wanted to see what you were reading…"

I looked at Fred, whose face was red. Something in his words touched my heart. Would this kid… Could it be possible that…

Fred stood up and opened the piano bench. He took a large notebook from inside. His face was still red, but he walked to me and gave me the notebook bravely.

I put the history book down and took the notebook. I opened it, and my chin fell down to my chest.

That was a sketch notebook. The first page was my portrait. The second page was also me. I flipped more pages and saw that every page was me; my full body, me in the park, even me in a superman suit. His drawing skill was also great. The composition was quite accurate. The detail was very clear, too.

I browsed through every page. The more pages I saw, the harder my heart beat. On the last page was my face. I found that at that page, near my lips, there was some trace of water, not drawn, but wet.

I raised my head to look at Fred. "Fred, you…"

Fred lowered his head, but now even his ears were all red. I put the notebook on the bed, and walked to Fred. I wrapped my arms around his neck.

"Fred, you… you kissed my picture, right?" I asked softly.

Fred still lowered his head. After a long pause, he nodded slightly.

I cradled his cheeks with my hands slightly, and looked at his round face. There was nothing more in my mind. All I thought was about the boy in front of me, who needed my hug and comfort, to fulfill his empty and lonely mind. I didn't hesitate. I embraced him and kissed his lips deeply.

My action surprised Fred, but soon he closed his eyes and embraced me tightly too. He looked like he was melting in my deep kiss. I kissed him deeply, as though we were stuck together, and couldn't be taken apart any more. At that moment, we were not only exchanging our first kisses, but also transferring the friendship and love between us. I felt that we were blending into one.

I searched his tongue. When my tongue touched his, I licked it and tasted his sweet juice. My hands started to caress his back, too. I had very few chances to touch anyone's bare body. Fred's skin was a bit cold under the air conditioning, but was very smooth. It was my first time to have such a tender feeling of touch. I took off his boxer underwear and fondled his back and ass crazily. Soon my dick stood up.

I'd never thought that such kiss with a boy would stimulate me so much. I always thought that I just hadn't met the right girl, as a matter of course. I'd never considered whether I was interested in any male person or not. However, at that moment, in front of this boy, I couldn't help giving Fred my first kiss. I released him and watched his blushing face and his white body. All I thought about was to feel his smooth skin with my own body.

I took off my T-shirt and my pants and underwear and lay down on the bed with Fred. I touched, and rubbed Fred's naked body with my own. My erect penis pushed against Fred's thigh. I kept kissing his cheeks, his ears, and his neck. I was about to explode. However, while kissing and sucking his hardened nipples, Fred pushed me away from him.

I was startled from the wonderful feelings of fondling Fred, just like falling from heaven to hell. I watched Fred's blushing face and asked, "Why? What happened?"

Fred sat up, and shook his head. "Nothing."

I saw Fred trying to cover his breasts with both arms subconsciously and then I understood. I was so impetuous that I had invaded somewhere he cared the most.

"Sorry, I must be too impetuous," I said. "I'd never thought that I would be so impulsive."

"It's okay," Fred said. After a while, he raised his head. "Are we becoming gay?"

I couldn't help starting to laugh. I laughed so hard, until I saw Fred's annoyed face. I tried to calm down and I hugged him with my arms. Then I pointed to my semi-hard dick, with some precum on the front of it.

"Look, kissing and touching you like that made my dick fully stand up."

Fred laughed, too.

I became serious, and said softly, "I never would have expected that a boy like you would bring me such a wonderful feeling. I always thought that I could never be gay. But now, I think that even if we are gay, so what? You don't need to mind if your body shape is not all that good. Your body made me feel very comfortable and wonderful. Really."

Fred leaned his head against my shoulder. I kissed his forehead.

"Don't mind how others see you, okay? Your body made me feel very good. Just remember that."

"Can we… do that again?" asked Fred.

"Yes, but I have some conditions," I said seriously.

Fred looked at me with eyes in question.

"First, this should be our secret or I would be thrown into jail."

Fred nodded.

"Then," I went on, "don't do stupid things any more, okay? If you try to commit suicide again, it will break my heart."

Fred lowered his head and nodded slightly after a while. "I won't. Now I have you…"

A warm feeling was flowing through my mind. I hugged Fred and felt his wonderful touch again.

Fred raised his head again. "But… if I hadn't tried to commit suicide last time, I'd never have met you."

I laughed out again, and hugged him tightly. "Yes, I'm sure we would have met. We are destined to be together."

Chapter 7

I kept asking myself after that day, that if Fred really fell in love with me or not? Or was it just a projection for being lonely? And, why was I so impetuous? What stimulated me so much, that I almost broke the law?

Though I kept asking myself about my feelings for Fred, I still did my best to accompany him. He was much happier in front of me and kept inviting me to his home again and again.

"To be honest, I'm afraid that one day I will not be able to control myself and harm you accidentally," I said.

"I don't mind at all," said Fred. "I like you hugging and kissing me like that. You didn't harm me at all."

"Aren't you afraid that one day I may attack your ass?" I said in jest, but actually I was really afraid that one day it might come true.

"If it were you, then I'd like to do that with you," Fred said seriously to my surprise.

I was surprised at Fred's answer, so I changed the topic. The next two times visiting his home I just cooked dinner, listened to his piano performance, and even became a model to let him sketch. I tried my best to control my mind and desires when seeing his shirtless or even naked body.

***

I was waiting for Fred in the guard room. It was the last day of Fred's final exam and he would come home at noon. I was on my day duty, so we arranged to go out together after I was off duty.

However, I didn't see Fred at the time he should appear. I waited impatiently and then I noticed that there were some boys outside our gate. They were looking at me, pointing at me, and laughing.

I didn't know why, and had no way to know. Fred still didn't appear and I started to worry about him. Finally, he showed up and it was already about one thirty.

I was about to greet him, but then I found out something was wrong. Fred was crying. He didn't even give me a look when passing the guard room. He just entered the elevator without talking to me.

Something must have happened. I waited for a few minutes and I tried to call his home. Nobody answered the phone. I tried and tried, but still nobody answered. I couldn't leave the guard room, so I had no choice but to wait for my off-duty time to arrive nervously.

It was really a hard time. Finally Wang came for the next duty. I tried to calm myself down and gave him the job record notebook.

"I'm going to patrol now," I said. Wang nodded.

I took the elevator to the 15th floor and I went to the roof to make sure if Fred was there or not. Fortunately, he was not there. I started to patrol each floor, with double the speed than normal. I only stopped for a while in front of Fred's home, then I decided to end my patrolling job first, as soon as possible.

When I went back to the first floor, I told Wang, "Everything is okay."

Wang nodded, "Okay, you can go home now."

I walked to the elevator.

"Hey, where are you going?" asked Wang behind me.

I didn't answer him and entered the elevator. I took the elevator to the 6th floor and ran to Fred's home as fast as possible. I tried the door and found that it was not locked.

"Fred?" I opened the door just a small slit and lowered my voice to call Fred.

No response.

My heart was beating very hard. "I'm coming," I said. I entered Fred's apartment and closed the door.

The air conditioner was not turned on. The whole apartment was quite hot. I looked at the living room and the kitchen, and then I went to Fred's room. The door was not closed. I walked into Fred's room. Fred was lying prone on his bed, in his boxer underwear only. He seemed to be asleep.

I sighed deeply with relief. I was not sure if I should awaken him to ask what had happened. Then I decided not to; just let him sleep. I picked up a thin quilt to cover his body slightly and was ready to leave his room.

When I was about to close the door, a tiny voice came to my ear.

"Don't go, Eric."

I turned around to see Fred. He was still lying prone. I stood there still and wondered if it was just my illusion.

"Don't go, Eric. Stay with me," Fred's tiny voice said again.

I walked to the bed and sat beside him.

"Did I awaken you?" I asked softly.

Fred didn't move except to shake his head.

I held Fred's left hand and rubbed his back softly. "Can you tell me what happened?"

After a long pause, Fred turned his head to look at me.

"Fuck me, Eric."

I was taken back at Fred's words. "What?"

"Fuck me."

"What did you mean? Why did you say that?"

"They have told everyone that I was fucked by you, so let's do it," he said in abandonment.

A cold feeling was racing along my spine.

"They? Who?"

Fred didn't answer. He got up and hugged me. His tears dropped again.

I hugged and patted him too. "Someone started a rumor at your school, right?"

After a while, Fred seemed to be calmed down a bit. He started to tell me the whole thing.

"My teacher talked with me after our exam. She said that someone told her that you brought me to browse everywhere and even brought me to your home to rape me, not only once."

"What did you say?"

"I denied it. I said that you were just a very good friend of mine and I have never gone to your home. Then she asked me if you had ever come to my home and I said yes. She kept asking me, very detailed and seriously, if I was raped by you or not. Finally, I lost my temper and shouted at her, 'No, no, no, I was not raped!' Even if I said yes, that would be because I want it!'"

Listening to Fred's words, the cold feeling was not only in my spine, but racing to my head. Though the room was so hot, my forehead was full of cold sweat.

"The teacher said that she had no choice but to call my father. She wanted me to be careful, not to be deceived and harmed by you. I was totally mad that time and I shouted at her again, 'So many people harmed me but you didn't care at all. Eric was the only one who cared about me and you told me that he might hurt me!' Then I cried and ran out of the school."

I was a total mess. Fred really had taken to me, wholeheartedly. That made me feel warm. However, it was also me that put him in the center of the rumor storm. At that time I finally understood why there were so many boys outside our gate laughing at me. The rumors must have been told to the whole school.

"Listen, Fred." I released Fred, and put my hands on his shoulders. I thought that though I didn't rape him, I couldn't control myself to kiss him and fondle him in this very room. That made it my fault.

"It's my fault," I said in shame. "It was me who put you into the center of the rumor storm. I…"

I hadn't finished my words, but I heard some uproar outside the room. Soon a man rushed into Fred's room. It was Fred's father. He stood there and watched us. My hands were still on Fred's shoulder, who was just in his underwear. Both Fred and I were shocked and froze there.

I saw that the face of Fred's father changed from pale to red. I knew that he must have misunderstood something and was about to explode. I stood up and was about to explain, but he was faster than I.

He strode to me and shouted, "YOU SON OF A BITCH! GET AWAY FROM MY SON!!"

The next moment, he grabbed my collar, and my nose was hit by a fist. The world was spinning. Fred's bed arose up to my eye. I saw a lot of stars flying in front of me. I heard Fred screaming. Then someone grabbed my collar again. I was just like a sandbag, lying there to let people hit. Then I felt Fred's shirtless body on my face.

"Don Ming Jun, GET UP! I'll kill the guy who abused you now!" Fred's father yelled furiously.

"Eric is the only one who didn't hurt me. You know nothing about it!" Fred screamed to his father. Then Fred shook my body. His tears dropped to my face. "Eric, Eric, are you okay?"

I moaned, and struggled to sit up. Blood flowed from my nose. A bloody taste was in my mouth too. I looked at Fred's father, who shuddered seriously due to his anger. He started to speak, slowly, word by word.

"Get, away, from, my, apartment, now. I, don't, care, if, you, had, ever, saved, Ming, Jun, or, not. Now, get, lost! I, promise, I'll, have, you, fired. Never, appear, in, front, of, us, any more!"

Fred hugged me from behind. "Don't go, Eric."

I stood up with great difficultly and wiped at the blood around my nose. I patted Fred's shoulder, and turned around to face his father. "I'll go now. But I beg you, it's not Fred's fault. Don't be too mean to him. He is already hurt badly. I'll take all the responsibilities."

"Take all the responsibilities?" Fred's father snorted. "What responsibility can you take? Can you afford the loss of Ming Jun's and my fame? Since you saved Ming Jun's life, I am letting you go. But never appear in front of us any more. Get lost! Now!"

"Don't always think about your fame. Take more care of Fred!" I shouted as I left Fred's room.

"Mind your own business!" yelled Fred's father, still furiously.

I didn't take the elevator, but went to the first floor down the stairs. Wang saw my pale face and my swelling nose, which was full of blood. He stood up in shock.

"Mai! What happened?"

I forced myself to give him a smile. "I hit the pillar."

I walked out of the gate, leaving a surprised Wang behind me.

Chapter 8

I was not fired by my company. However, because I had argued with the inhabitants and was hit, I was transferred to another building and was fined a half-month of salary. I thought that the main reason why I wasn't fired was that Fu must had interceded for me in front of our boss.

However, I didn't worry about if I would be fired or not. I worried about Fred the most. I didn't know how seriously Fred quarrelled with his father after I left them and how Fred had been those last few days. I heard from Fu that Fred's father moved to another place with Fred after that day. He didn't know where they moved to and he had never seen them any more.

Though I worried about Fred so much, I had no choice but to give up. I had always taken Fred to the fishing port or the park when I was off duty. We would chat and laugh there. After that day I could only stare at the sea alone, thinking about Fred. If I was not with him, then who could he talk to about his worries? Fred was so lonely before we met. He didn't have many friends, and the only family, his father, could not understand him. His father might even think that it was enough to give him money to take care of himself. Fred's father had never thought about how lonely Fred would be. Well, even I could not imagine how lonely he would be. He had tried to commit suicide three times, but still didn't get his father's concern. Would he do the stupid thing again if I wasn't with him?

I took some time to clean my own apartment. I saw the paper box under my bed and thought of those old comics, novels, and classical music CDs I loaned to Fred. Well, Fred didn't give them back to me, and I didn't ask him for them. Maybe, it would be fortunate that I had left something with him. Oh, and that sketch notebook; maybe Fred could talk to my picture to release his pressure. Would that notebook be destroyed by his father? Even so, Fred could draw more. He could. His drawing skill was so great, and his memory was too. He could draw me with so much detail without me being there as his model. He could draw more, I believed.

A lot of such thoughts ran through my mind day by day. I felt myself about to explode. I found that I really fell in love with this boy. Since the day we were forced to be kept apart; all I thought was if he would be all right or not. I didn't care about myself any more. Fu sometimes called me to ask me if I was okay or not. He even found some reasons to treat me to dinner because I was fined for a half-month of my salary. I didn't tell him much about my concern for Fred. I didn't even say "thank you" to him. I just put my appreciation to him in my mind.

I was transferred to an old community. Most of the houses in this community were empty because their owners just bought the houses but didn't live here. I was the youngest guard there, so I was assigned to be on most night duties. When I was off, or before going to work, I would still go to that bookstore to read books. It was just that, most of the time, I would not concentrate on the books. I always raised my head when someone walked into the bookstore. I always expected that Fred would come into the bookstore to push me or pat my back, like before.

***

It was about 1 o'clock in the morning. I sat in the guard room, listening to the classical music from the radio. A luxury car came to the gate of the community. I walked out of the guard room, to see who had come here.

"Good evening, sir. Who do you want to …"

I stopped in shock. The man in the driver's seat was Fred's father. He stepped out of his car.

My mouth was open, but I couldn't speak any more. I saw Fred's father walking toward me and look at me. He looked very wan and sallow, not nearly as arrogant as before.

"Mister… mister… mister Mai…" he stammered.

I closed my mouth, but still couldn't speak. After a long silence, I tried my best to squeeze out some words. "Hi, Mr. Don. Long time no see."

Fred's father looked at me. All of a sudden, he knelt down in front of me!

I was thrown into panic. I cradled his arms. "Mr. Don, please, please get up! Don't be like that. What happened?"

Fred's father didn't get up. On the contrary, he put both of his hands stretched out on the ground, falling into a prone position.

"Mr. Mai, please, please save Ming Jun…"

My heart sank when I heard Fred's name. "Fred? What happened to him?"

"He… he…"

"What happened to him? Tell me!" I asked nervously.

"He hasn't eaten and drunk anything for two weeks and he doesn't want to speak to me any more. Then he couldn't hang on anymore and fainted and I sent him to the hospital. He woke up, but still didn't want to speak to me. I begged him to speak to me and he finally said, 'I want to see Eric…'"

Tears dropped onto the face of Fred's father.

"Please, Mr. Mai, now only you can save Ming Jun. It's my fault that I hit you and almost made you be fired. It's my fault. I… I apologize to you. Please save Ming Jun. He is my only son. His mother passed away so early. If he… if he… I…" Fred's father couldn't speak any more, just hit the ground with his own head. I grabbed his shoulder.

"Okay, okay, Mr. Don. Please get up." I cradled his arm to help him get up. "Where is Fred now?"

"In the City Hospital."

"Okay, I'll go with you. But I can't go now. I need someone to be on duty for me. Please wait here."

I ran into the guard room and thought for a moment. Only Fu could help me.

I called Fu's home number with my cell phone and prayed that he was not on duty.

After ringing for nearly two minutes, a sleepy voice answered the phone. It was Fu.

"Hello? Who do you want to speak to? Do you know what time it is?"

I sighed with relief. "Fu, it's me, Mai."

"Mai?" Fu's voice became clear. "What happened?"

"Are you on duty now?"

"Apparently not."

"Then, can you give me a hand? Now I have something urgent and I have to leave. Can you come here to be on duty for me?"

Fu thought for a while. "Is it for the Don boy?"

"Yes. His father is here. He said that Fred has been on a hunger strike for two weeks. Now he is in the hospital."

"Okay, wait for me. I'll be there soon. The Sunrise Community on the 4th boulevard, right?"

"Yes. Thanks."

"Okay. And Mai?"

"What?"

"Listen. Now you are the only one who can save the boy's soul. Don't give up. Okay?"

Listening to Fu's words, my tears almost escaped from my eyes. "Okay."

"I'll be there soon." Fu hanged up the phone.

I walked out of the guard room to Fred's father. "Another guard is on the way here. Please wait for a moment and I'll go with you."

Tears were still on his face and he held my hands tightly. "Thank you, thank you."

He went back to his car, and I waited in the guard room nervously. After about ten minutes, a motorcycle came at a very fast speed. It was Fu.

When Fu walked into the guard room, I couldn't control myself anymore. I embraced him tightly.

"Thank you, Fu. You always help me in my most needy moment."

Fu was surprised at my action, but then he smiled and patted my shoulder. "Hurry up. The Don boy is waiting for you."

I ran out and entered the car. Fred's father started the car and made a U-turn. He sped up.

There was a long, awkward silence in the car, then Fred's father finally broke it.

"I really don't understand why Ming Jun would try to commit suicide again and again… What on earth is wrong?"

"You still don't understand why Fred would try to commit suicide?" His words irritated me. I yelled at him. "Do you know how he was bullied and teased in school? Do you know what he liked and disliked? Do you know what he wished to have? Do you know what he worried about the most? Do you know what he took for his meals? He had tried to commit suicide three times, now the fourth, to try to make you more concerned about him; and how about you? Have you done anything except feeling ashamed of him? Have you shared some of your time with him?"

Fred's father was no longer arrogant and mean. Instead, he was totally depressed, frustrated, and lost.

"I… Since Ming-Jun's mother died, I always thought that I must give him a good life…"

"A good life is not built by money. It must be built by love, concern, and time."

"He is my son! I love him! I am concerned about him! I… I just have no time… and he hates me! I know that he hates me!" Fred's father became agitated and he shouted.

"No, Fred doesn't hate you at all." Contrary to his actions, I calmed down. "If he hated you, he wouldn't need to try to commit suicide at all. Why can't you see and understand that clearly?"

"He told me that he fell in love with you. Apparently he accepted you, but not me," Fred's father said in frustration and depression.

"Did he really say that?" I was surprised. A complicated feeling filled my mind.

Fred's father nodded. "He told me when we argued. Then he started to…"

"To be honest, I fell in love with him too," I said, without any consideration. The car stopped suddenly, in the middle of the road. Fred's father looked at me in surprise. I went on. "Since the day I left you, there has not been a single day that I didn't miss him. What worried me the most was that Fred fell out with you and did a stupid thing to harm himself again. I prayed a lot to hope my worries would be just worries, but your pressure, your lack of patience overrode God's desires. You wouldn't let up on him so he fought back again."

"I…"

"And, let me tell you. You are totally wrong," I said, interrupting his attempt at making excuses. "You are his father. You are always the most important one in his mind. He just doesn't know how to love you, just like you don't know how to love him. You both need to learn how to love!"

Fred's father didn't speak anymore. He just started to drive again, and kept silent all the remaining way to the hospital. Soon we arrived. He parked his car and took me to the ward.

Different floor, and different ward. However, very coincidently, the nurse on duty was the same one; the one who cared about Fred too. She saw me with Fred's father and was a bit surprised. But soon she gave me a smile and nodded to me. I entered Fred's room with his father.

Fred was lying on the bed and again his left hand was connected to an intravenous feed. He seemed to be deeply asleep. I walked to the bed and watched his face. He looked pale and was a lot thinner than the last time I saw him. It must be because of his hunger strike. His eyes were closed, but I could see tears on his face. I squatted beside him and caressed his head and face gently.

Fred awakened. He looked at me and his tears escaped from his eyes. He said weakly, "Eric… you… you finally came at last…"

Just like him, my tears had already fallen down uncontrollably. "Yes, I have come. You little fool… you promised me that you would never do the stupid things again… didn't you?" I made sure I spoke softly but sternly.

"But… without you… I…"

"Say no more," I stopped him. "I won't leave you any more."

Fred closed his eyes. He nodded.

"Have a good sleep and start to eat something tomorrow morning, okay?" I said softly.

He nodded again. I heard a sigh of relief behind me.

"Well, actually you look a lot thinner. It's good," I said.

Fred opened his eyes and laughed weakly. He gave me his hand, and held mine. I turned my head to look at his father. He hesitated for a while and walked to the other side of the bed.

"Ming-Jun, I found your Eric, and he is here now. Can you forgive Daddy?"

Fred looked at his father. His tears dropped again, but he nodded as hard as he could. His father held his hands tightly.

Chapter 9

I walked into the bookstore and looked around. Finally I found Fred. There was a new large sketch notebook in his hand. He saw me and ran to me happily.

"You finally came, Eric."

"Yeah, I was delayed when transferring the duty. How did you get here?"

"I took the bus."

"Oh, I see that you bought a new sketch notebook."

"Yeah. I've filled the previous one."

"You are really good at drawing," I said.

Fred blushed and gave me a smile.

"My motorcycle is out there. Let me take you home. I haven't visited your new home yet," I said.

"Sure. I'm going to pay for this notebook."

"Okay, I'll wait outside."

I walked out and waited for Fred on my motorcycle. After awhile, he came out of the bookstore and walked to me. He handed me his bag and climbed up and sat behind me. Just like before, he wrapped his arms around my waist, and leaned his head against my back.

"Wanna buy something to cook at your home?" I asked.

"Sure," said Fred.

We went to a supermarket and picked out some vegetables and different types of food cans, and of course, noodles. To be honest, I could cook that only. However, Fred still looked happy. He handed me some money.

"Eric, I know that you don't have much money, so it's my treat," he said, using the same words he always did.

Fred's father wanted to give me a sum of money, saying that he hoped I could take more care of Fred. I refused him. I told him that I'd prefer to use this money to buy his time, to let him accompany Fred more. After that, Fred liked to come and have dinner with me and always handed me money to pay. I didn't want him to do that, but it was also true that I was on a tight budget, so sometimes I had no choice but to let him pay.

We went to Fred's new home. It was in another tall building. We greeted the guard.

"Who is he?" asked the guard.

"He's my brother," said Fred.

"Oh, I didn't know you have a brother," said the guard.

"He doesn't live with us," said Fred.

We took the elevator to the 12th floor.

"I didn't lie to him, right?" Fred said, with a grimace.

I laughed and nodded.

We walked to Fred's apartment and he showed me his new home.

It was a bit smaller than the previous one and was also very hot in the afternoon. The layout of the living room was not too much different from before, only that the small cabinet was gone.

"It seems to be a bit smaller than your previous apartment," I said.

Fred turned on the air conditioner and nodded. "Yeah. It's only the two of us, and my dad is not home often. We don't need a big apartment. Being alone in a big apartment was quite lonely."

"Does he still come home late now?"

"Yeah, but sometimes he would come home earlier and we would chat for a while before sleeping. Sometimes he would even come to my school to take me to have dinner with his colleagues or customers."

"Then how about tonight? Will he come home early?"

"No. He won't come home today because he is on a business trip. He told me to ask you if you can stay with me tonight."

I raised my eyebrows. "Really?"

Fred nodded. "I told him that we hugged and kissed in the nude that evening."

"What did he say?" I tried to control myself but shuddered.

Fred laughed when he saw me shuddering. "My dad said that if it were Eric, he would accept it, because he knows that you love me and won't hurt me. If I know what I am doing, he won't object."

I sighed with relief. "I'm really afraid to be hit by his fist again," I said, rubbing my nose.

Fred laughed again. "He is always like that. He always loses his temper before making anything clear. I apologize to you for him, okay?"

"You don't have to. He apologized to me last time." I smiled and patted his head.

We put everything in the kitchen and Fred took his sketch notebook to his room. He came back to the kitchen while I was preparing to cook. I was quite surprised when I saw him.

Fred was totally nude!

"Fred, you…"

Fred looked at me for a few seconds and embraced me tightly.

"Eric, I've waited for this day for a long, long time," he leaned his head against my chest and said.

I embraced him tightly, too, and caressed his back gently. After a while, I made up my mind.

"Me too," I said softly. I took off my T-shirt, pants and underwear. We embraced each other naked in the kitchen.

Again, I felt the touch between my naked body and Fred's. I smelled the sweat on his body. I caressed his body gently. Very naturally my dick stood up and pushed against his belly. He raised his head and waited there. I kissed him deeply.

I had no more concerns. I didn't have to worry about Fred's father coming home and throwing me out of the window, or throwing me into jail. I just needed to care about the boy in front of me; the boy I missed so much during the day when I couldn't see him; the boy who spent his whole life learning how to love his father; the boy who was not quite handsome, and was not in a good body shape, but with a sensitive and stubborn soul of an artist; the boy I loved so much.

I kissed and caressed him. My tongue licked his. My erect penis rubbed his belly. Fred released me after a few minutes.

"Let's go to take a bath first and have dinner later. Okay?"

I nodded. Fred took me to his room. His room was still as large as the one before. The king-size bed was still in the center, along the wall. His piano, desk and bookshelf were on the opposite side of the bed.

Fred took me to the small bathroom in his room. There was no bathtub, only a small space to take a shower. We pulled down the shower curtain. I smiled and looked at his body.

He was much thinner after his two-week hunger strike. It was apparent that his belly and breasts were smaller than before. His penis and sac were pink, and hung between his thighs. He looked much better than before.

"You became so thin," I said. "To be honest, you are much more stubborn than I thought."

Fred blushed, but he replied back soon. "Just like my father."

"Now, I think that he should be much more calm than before for you."

Fred nodded. "If it weren't for you, I… maybe I would have never reconciled with my father."

I smiled and kissed his cheek. "You just need to learn how to love each other. Love needs learning; just like I need to learn how to love you, too."

I turned on the faucet, and adjusted the temperature of water to be a bit warm. We let the water hit our bodies. Under the water, I kissed Fred again.

I don't know how long we kissed. Fred turned off the water and started to soap my body. I just stood there to let him soap my body, my chest, my ass, and my penis and sac. Then I took the soap from Fred's hand.

"Now it's my turn," I said.

I put the soap on the shelf and rubbed Fred's body with my own soapy body. I soaped his back, his two small cheeks, and the cleft in his back with my hands. Fred closed his eyes to enjoy the feeling. I kept rubbing his body, and moved my hand to his 3-inch penis.

I stood behind Fred and rubbed Fred's ass with my erect penis. My right hand rubbed his penis and my left hands caressed his chest and nipples. My mouth licked Fred's ears.

Actually, I had had no sex experience. All the actions I did were learned from adult videos. Of course, those video clips were all straight. I didn't know if those actions could bring joyful feelings to Fred. I did my best and I got my reward from him.

Fred's penis stood up. I kept rubbing it and he started to moan.

"Oh… um… Eric, I…"

"What? Did you feel uncomfortable?"

"No, it's very, very comfortable. I… I've never been… that comfortable before," he said while gasping.

I was encouraged and I went on with my actions. My penis kept rubbing his cheeks and my left hand kept playing with his nipple. I felt Fred's body start to tremble and become hard.

"Ah… Eric… Oh… yes~~~"

After a longer moan, Fred's body relaxed. He seemed to give out all his strength and I cradled him under his armpits.

"Are you okay?" I asked.

"I…" Fred stood up and turned around. He embraced me tightly. "I don't know why. The feeling was so special."

"That would be your climax," I said. "Maybe. Honestly, my knowledge of sex may not be more than yours. When we had class about sex education before, our teacher just told us to read textbooks at home by ourselves. She didn't want to teach anything about sex at all."

Fred laughed. "It was really a wonderful, exciting, and.. and… and very special feeling!"

"I'm glad. I was actually afraid that I would make you uncomfortable."

Fred turned on the faucet again and started to rinse our bodies. He saw my erect penis.

"If I rub it just like what you did to me, will you be that comfortable too?"

"Yes, and I'll cum."

"I know," Fred said. "I didn't expect that the feeling would be so great."

"You know? Has your teacher taught you about that?"

Fred blushed. "I… I found a lot of data on the internet, about…"

"About what?"

"About… how two boys… do such a thing…"

I was surprised. This boy was really serious.

"So what did you read?" I asked with great interest, though I had known a bit about that.

"Um… Well… one boy would use his dick… to put into another's… another's…" Fred was blushing deeply.

"Another's what?" Looking at Fred's blushing face, I asked in tease.

"Another's… ass." Fred finally completed this sentence.

"But do you know how to do that? I don't know how to do that correctly," I asked, still a bit nervously.

"Oh, I prepared something for that."

"Wow, it looks like you planned so well to seduce me here," I laughed and said.

"No, I didn't," protested Fred. "I was just…"

"I know, I was just kidding." I kissed Fred. "Just like what you had said, even if you said yes, it would be because I want it."

We cleaned the soap bubbles off of our bodies and dried each other with a big towel. Fred had me lie on his bed with him.

"Do you really want to do it?" I asked, still feeling a bit uneasy about having anal sex.

Fred blushed, but he nodded seriously. "Because I really love you…"

Looking at his serious face, I made up my mind. "I love you too, Fred. I missed you so much during those days I couldn't see you."

"Eric…"

We embraced each other tightly. The air conditioner made the room cool and our skin became dry and smooth. We kissed. My hand caressed his soft and smooth skin. My body rubbed his. The feeling was even better than the time in the kitchen and bathroom.

I kissed his cheek, his neck, and his nipples. He cringed a bit.

"Don't you still like others to touch there?" I asked softly.

"It's okay," said Fred, with a blushing face.

"Actually, you body shape is much better than before," I said.

Fred smiled. I kissed his little nipples. Though he was much thinner, his breasts were still a bit plump. Then I went on to other parts.

Fred's reaction in the bathroom had made me a lot more confident. I kissed his belly, and rubbed his thighs with my cheek. Soon I came to his little dick. I kissed and sucked his stiffened small pillar. Then I turned his body around to start kissing his two mounds.

Fred took something from the night stand.

"Eric, use this."

"Vaseline?"

"I read on the internet that you can put it on your fingers and put them into my… my… asshole."

All right. This was what he prepared. Though I had seen some adult video clips, he might know more than me about that. I followed his instructions. I applied a gob of Vaseline to my index finger, and slowly inserted it into Fred's anus.

Fred grabbed my hand and made my finger go in and out of his little puckered hole.

"Can you try two fingers?" he requested, after a few minutes.

I scooped out more Vaseline with my index and middle fingers and again went in and out of his tunnel. After a while, Fred shuddered as if he got an electric shock.

"What? Why did you shudder?"

"You… you just touched a point, and that made me shudder like an electric shock. Go on, Eric, please."

I started to explore inside Fred's hole. I massaged, rubbed, kept going in and out with my two fingers. Fred's reaction was stronger and stronger.

"Yes, yes, oh… Eric, yes…"

I kept up my action and Fred seemed to enjoy the pleasure his body brought him. Watching his joyful face, I felt excited too. His moan stimulated me. I rubbed his hot tunnel with one hand and caressed his dick and sac with the other.

Since two fingers could bring him such strong feelings, how about three fingers? I seemed to start understanding how to do that. I pulled out my fingers, applied Vaseline to my three fingers, and started those actions again. Fred's reaction was even stronger.

"Oh… oh… Eric, I want… I want your… your dick…"

My penis was fully erect. I thought about that, finally, I was going to dedicate my virginity to Fred. That made me even more excited. I started to apply Vaseline to my steel-like dick. Fred changed his position. He lay prone on the bed, with his beautiful butt cheeks presented to me.

"Hurry, Eric, just like that…"

I knelt down on the bed and started to try to penetrate Fred's small hole with my huge dick. Though I just tried with my three fingers, it was still difficult to insert my dick into him. I held his mounds and tried to make the hole larger. Then I tried again to enter him with my dick.

Finally, I found a way to slide my penis into him. I tried to push my penis, but Fred began screaming really loud.

"Ouch!!!"

I pulled out my penis in shock. "What happened, Fred?"

"It… hurt…" Fred held his own cheeks with his both hands. I saw that his tears escaped from his eyes. I was in panic.

"Sorry, I didn't know that. I didn't mean to hurt you." I lay down beside him and hugged him. "Sorry, did it really hurt?"

Fred leaned his head against my chest and sobbed. After a while, he said, "It's okay. Not your fault, Eric. I just didn't expect that it would be so painful."

"Maybe I was too impetuous, too quick?"

"I read on the internet that people say it would hurt at first, so we need some lubrication like Vaseline. But I didn't expect it to hurt like that."

He was really serious, I thought. However I still felt guilty.

"I think we'd better give up," I said.

Fred hugged me. He stopped sobbing. On the contrary, he seemed to try to comfort me. "At the time that your fingers were massaging inside my hole, the feeling was so wonderful. I've never, ever had that feeling. Maybe your dick was still much larger than your fingers."

It was my turn to blush. My dick became soft. Fred kissed my cheek.

"It seemed that you know much more than me about this," I said. "I think we'd better give up and try it again next time. I was scared by you and my dick is soft now."

Fred shook his head. "I'm so hungry. Let's have dinner first. We'll have plenty of time tonight. We can research how to do that together."

Research? Oh my goodness! I surrendered to him, through and through. Fred was so stubborn. I gave him a wry smile. "I just said that I need to learn how to love you. Now I have to learn how to make love with you, too."

Fred laughed. Watching his laughter, I laughed too.

The End