Sometimes there is a line that you cross, an action that simply can't be forgiven. You may not know it while you are doing it but upon reflection-you know something has changed. There is a grit associated with you, a slight stench, and you know you can never really be clean again.

Ever since that day I have had trouble looking people in the eye. I think a part of me knew I wasn't as good as they were. It really is not fair. I have certainly done things in the heat of the moment, in the heat of passion, that I know are wrong...but I just could not help myself. To be honest, it's not always my fault.

Sometimes other people intentionally set me off, I don't know why-but they do. I guess that's really how this mess all got started. I don't think I am evil, yet, but I am no longer clean.

As I walked into the church, a strange feeling washed over me. God was here, this was HIS house and He knew what I had done. We both did, and I did not want to meet him. I did not belong here. But I had to talk to someone, anyone. I don't have a lot of money so I can't afford a shrink. Besides I'm not sure there is anything wrong with me mentally. I needed someone I could trust, someone who would never tell another soul about it. Someone who would rather die than betray me. And hey, if their services were free-"Shit yeah, even better!"

I am not catholic but I knew enough to know one of their priests would be perfect. I needed someone to tell me everything would be ok, to listen, and care.

That was not what I got.

Father Ronald was a good priest. That was rare enough. But he was also a good man. He understood that people were human, that we made mistakes and all fall short of the free gift of God's love. He saw himself as a teacher, one who would patiently, lovingly lead his flock back from despair. His job was to walk beside them to provide support, guidance and yes even discipline when necessary. He was a gentle man, but like Jesus he had a temper, a righteous zeal for God's word that he could not, no WOULD not ever hide. He saw the large man with the dark eyes enter his church. The young man was troubled. He also looked like he might smell when he got a little closer. Father Ronald chastised himself briefly for making negative judgments about a person. But they were alone in the church and as the 6ft 3in man stalked towards him, he could not help but feel a trickle of fear. He tried to compensate.

"Good day my son, is there anything I can do to help?" In a voice that was rusty from lack of use the Rapist said, "um, ahem yes sir, I need to talk to someone. I need help". Father Ronald led him to the confessional without a word.

They each entered the small wooden booth, and were separated by a thin, mesh screen.

"I am not catholic, I've never done this before...if we just talk will it still work? Can you forgive me? Will you still have to keep it private? Nobody else can know", he asked in rapid fire.

Father Ronald was slightly alarmed. There were some limits to the confessional seal. He wanted to be honest. "As long as nobody is in imminent danger I will not discuss any aspect of our conversation. If you had say, placed a bomb I would warn the police that it was about to go off. If you have engaged in criminal actions I may ask you to confess your crimes before granting absolution. But I will not turn you in. I swear in the name of my god, and by the holy oaths I took to do his will."

John was concerned. There were too many loopholes. He did not want the police involved at all. Then it came to him. "I will tell you what happened, but understand I am very confused by all of this. Some of my story is hypothetical, some is only fantasy. Portions are all true, but I need your help to sort it out."

Father Ronald agreed to listen. John began to speak. He told much of his story as if he was a detached observer only.

"I don't know where to begin...there is a woman I know, I think I hurt her. Technically I did something sexual to her, but she does not know it. The woman is my little sister, and she did sort of ask for it to happen. Wait a minute I'm not saying this very well. Let me try again.

Susan is 19 years old; she is 3 years younger than I am. She is so pretty, with light blonde hair, and the bluest eyes you have ever seen. She has this soft, breathy voice that could make a guy hard from across the room, and she naturally smells like lilac flowers and raw sex.

When I was 13 I used to fool around with her a little. Nothing really bad, just wrestling, and stuff. Sometimes I'd tickle her until she pissed herself. I'd run my hands all over her body making her squeal. I think I gave her the first orgasm when she was 10. We were wrestling and I pinned her. I held her arms over her head and felt myself get hard as I rubbed my cock into her pussy (through our clothes). She kept begging me to let her up but I wouldn't.

I thought she was going to pee on herself but suddenly she started shaking, and bucking her hips against me. She was breathing really fast. I came in my pants, while she squirmed underneath me.

That was the first time for both of us. I knew she wanted more, but I was scared my parents would find out. Afterwards Susan would still sit in my lap and watch TV, we'd hug and kiss goodnight-and I'd get hard, and I believe she got wet-but we never went that far again.

I got a girlfriend when I was 14 and was soon having sex all the time...so it was easier to control myself. It was 10 years before I wanted to fuck my sister again. She was in college, and I have a small apartment nearby. She went to a frat party and got drunk (drugged?) so she called me to pick her up. When I got there she was really out of it.

There were frat-boys all around her and I had the feeling they were working up the nerve to do something. She was lying on this couch, her legs were spread open and guys were talking about her like she was a cheap slut. I walked in picked her up and left so fast they did not have time to figure out what was going on. By the time I got her inside my apartment she was completely unconscious.

I took her shoes off, and then for some reason decided to undress her to make her comfortable. I pulled her silk top off, and looked at her flimsy purple bra. I could see her nipples peeking through. I felt myself get hard.

Next I pulled her skirt off of her. I accidentally pulled her panties down too. Suddenly my sweet smelling, sexy little sister was laying in my bed, unconscious, with her legs spread and juicy, wearing only a flimsy lace bra. I was horny, she was out of it, and would never know so I figured, why not!

First I took that fucking bra off so I could suck on her perky, pear shaped little titties. I know you probably have no idea how good a sweet, salty young tit tastes, but take my word for it, it's fucking unbelievable. Knowing that it was my little sister's made it even more exciting. That she was mine, completely helpless.

I licked it, nibbled on her soft tit meat for a long time. I buried my face in her bosom and inhaled the scent of her, reveled in the special warmth that a woman gives only from her center. I don't think I have ever been so close to Susan as I was then. I was completely at peace. In the back of my mind I knew it was wrong... but this was a once in a lifetime opportunity, I had to go for it. Any man would have done the same thing.

I wanted to taste every crack, every delicious little crevice on my drunken sister. I wanted to lap at her wet cunt, to drink her essence in. I positioned her body into an "X". I couldn't help licking her underarms for several minutes. She smelled so musky and sweet. The unique fragrance of soap, and sweat, and sex and sweet, sister Susan was intoxicating. I got my Polaroid out and began taking pictures.

She looked so happy as I explored her fresh, young body, I was glad I could give her pleasure. I had taken 20 pictures when I realized there was something much better to record our first time together. I ran to the hall closet and got my video camera. It took a couple of minutes to set it up but it was worth it.

Susan's breasts, and armpits tasted so delicious I needed more of her. After all this would have to last a lifetime. I began kissing her beer soaked mouth. Slowly I moved to her neck and sucked where her adamsapple would have been. For some reason I wanted to leave my mark on her, to brand her as my property-so all would know. I could not resist licking the underside of her breasts.

The sweat seemed to collect there, so it was a special treat. Reluctantly I moved down to her flat little tummy and began tonguing her belly button cave. Her stomach gave these involuntary shudders, and I couldn't help but to smile. Finally I reached her curly little blonde bush.

I wanted a close up of that do I spread her legs even wider and zoomed in with the camera to capture her pretty, puffy, pussy lips from every angle. I put the camera back down and just had to have a taste. I put us in a 69 with me on top. I liked the idea of my fat smelly cock poking her in the face while I ate my baby sister's snatch. I finally got her clit to come out and I sucked it lovingly for a long time.

Suddenly for the second time in 10 years I made Susan cum. She dripped and dribbled and oozed her fuck fluids all over my bed. She wasn't the least bit shy, or embarrassed about cumming in front of her own brother.

I'm not saying she was a slut, she just couldn't help herself. I'm not judging her, after all I love her.

I sucked and slurped and sipped her pussy as fast as I could. I did not want to miss a single drop. By now I was really hard. I was ready to fuck her. I had my first serious doubt. Sucking her tit, and licking her pussy was one thing. I could rationalize it away. It was inappropriate sure, but it was not really sex. It was more like innocent fun.

I know if I had done this first, gone straight for her pussy meat I would probably have stopped. But because I took my time, built up to it, anticipated it --now there was no way I was going to stop. It was wrong, and I knew it, but I didn't fucking care. This was ...sin. I chose to fuck her anyway.

Her pussy smell was so sweet, so fucking good. Susan's taste was in my mouth, and I wanted to fuck her. It was as simple as that. I took my cock head and lined it up with my sister's vaginal slit. I rubbed her clit hard with my dick, pressing her button, making her cum over and over. It was like a game. She was my hot little sex toy and I enjoyed playing with her pussy.

She was so wet I slid right in. Her cunt was warm, it fit me so snug. It felt like she had a fever. I knew that we were made for each other. I rubbed her clit and manually stimulated her, while sucking on her fat little nipple stubs. I wanted to see how many times I could make Susan cum. At first I was barely fucking her.

I just rammed myself as deep as I could and held it there enjoying her heat, and contractions. The power that I had over her was delicious. Every once in a while I'd grind myself into her deep and hold it. The tight contractions that her pussy gave as she spasamed were amazing. It was like a velvet glove that kept making a fist.

Her breathing came in these pants, she was soaked in sweat, and her body was shivering and squirming underneath me. Finally I knew I could not hold out any longer. I began fucking, rutting, ramming my little sister's cunt, as hard as I could.

I think I lost control at some point, and wanted to wake her up. A sick part of me wanted to see her eyes open with her brother balls deep inside her, sucking her tits, and a video camera recording it all. I began shaking her violently, calling her name as I pounded her cunt, trying desperately to wake her up before I came.

Just before I spewed my salty cream, I pulled out and sprayed it all over her face. Then I played with my spunk, positioning it evenly all over her eyelids, nose, and finger feeding it into her mouth, smoothing it all over her pretty lips.

After resting for a couple of minutes I got the camera and took a close up of her cum covered, face. I wanted some special audio to go with those final moments, so I could always remember:

"Susan, I love you. I love your tits, and your sweet ass, and your warm cunt, and your salty belly button and your fuzzy armpits. I love how tight you are, and how sweet you smell. You look so precious laying here with my cum dripping, and drying, forming a flaky crust on your face. Do you like the taste of my cum in your mouth? Are you a cum-slut honey? Do you need my cock baby, your brother's nasty dick? Even though I pulled out, there is a chance you may be carrying your big brother's son. This night is ours. For this one night you are MINE! I OWN YOU!" I said as I cupped her sex, and played with her ass.

I raised her butt in both hands and lifted her sticky cunt to my face. I kissed and licked and sucked and ate my sister's cunt until she came again. I left my face buried in her thighs and slowly breathed her in. I belonged here, and I knew it. My hands reached up to wrap around her tits passively but I left my face in her cunt. I blew a raspberry on her pussy lips, just for fun. I was sticky with her cum and sweat as it dripped on to me. At some point I dozed off. Not quite asleep, but just content, and warm and safe, in my sister's pussy.

Finally I got a washcloth and some paper towels and cleaned her up. I put her panties back on and dressed her in an old nightshirt. I took the pictures and videotape and hid them in my closet. I sprayed Lysol in the room and then opened the windows to get the sex smell out. I tucked her in my bed, gave her tits one last playful tug, locked and then closed the door. I got a pillow and blanket and went to sleep on the couch. Like any loving brother would."

Father Ronald sat in stunned silence at what he had heard. The raw sexuality and coarse, vulgar descriptions offended his sensibilities. He said a brief prayer to the lord asking for the wisdom and patience to touch the heart of the sinner before him. There must be some good, some shred of conscience and morality for him to come to this church seeking guidance. He would nurture that tiny flicker, fan it, pour God's love onto it, until it was a raging fire that burned away the dross of filth and base debauchery and left a pure, clean, shining metal of true repentance and remorse.

"That's quite a story son. We have a lot to talk about. It may be easier if we were on a first name basis. My name is father Ronald, if you are more comfortable, since you are not catholic, you may call me Father, or even Ron. What is your name?"

No way I was telling him my real name, even if he was a priest. I decided to use the nickname most people called me since childhood.

"My name is Jaz," I said in a quiet voice.

"Jaz I am very concerned about you. You have done some truly horrific things. I won't pretend to understand your motivations yet. This was your sister, your own flesh and blood. To take advantage of her was not only wrong, it was perverted. She loves and trusts you and you betrayed her in the worst way. Your very soul is at stake. If you die in such a state of gross sin, you will burn in hell for all eternity. Whether you repent or not, for the rest of your life, for all eternity you will be known as a rapist, an abuser of the innocent, of your own Sister. But all is not lost. You see Christ shed his pure, precious blood, he died an agonizing, sacrificial death so that sinners might have hope. Jesus loves you, even you, and wants you to repent of your wicked deeds. "

I was beginning to get a little angry, and was wondering if I had made a mistake in coming here. All I was looking for was a little comfort, a dollop of human kindness and understanding. I did not need a lecture or threats about going to hell. I felt guilty enough about what I had done. But come on I had not really hurt my sister! Her life had gone on unchanged. She had no idea what I had done. I was still her loving brother who she trusted. That is what was so frustrating. She woke up the next morning with a hangover and an all over body ache. She came out to the couch and asked me where I kept my aspirin. I got her 3 and a glass of juice. After a few minutes she came up behind me in the kitchen and gave me a tight hug.

"Thanks for coming to my rescue last night. I think somebody must have spiked the punch at the party. I was half expecting to wake up naked and surrounded by naked frat-boys. It was such a relief to find myself safe in my big brother's bed. I could smell you, your cologne on the sheets, your scent was all over me, all over your room. I knew where I was before I opened my eyes. I got lucky this time, I am never losing control like that again. Thanks Jaz. I love you", she said as she hugged me tight, pressing into me from behind.

I could feel her warm, soft tits on my back and enjoy her crotch rubbing against my ass. I wanted to turn around and hold her properly, but my cock was hard and I couldn't. In the days that followed, I was no longer satisfied with the role of big brother. When she hugged me or gave me a peck on the cheek I wanted to grab her and fuck her like she was my woman, my property. I wanted to strip her and spread her and lick her and sniff her, and drink her cum. I knew it was wrong but I just could not help myself.

The pictures and video sure didn't help. I saw her hot little naked body respond to my touch over and over again. Whenever I wanted, I had proof! Susan, belonged to me. There is no way a woman can cum that many times without loving you on some level. I knew that.

For some reason she wouldn't allow herself to admit how she really felt. The frustration, the closeness and the video evidence combined to make a dangerous situation.

I can see now that the priest had gotten the wrong idea. He thought I felt guilty about making love to my sister while she slept. I guess I did a little, but after all she did not even know I did it, I mean shit, and how guilty was I supposed to feel about that! I had to try explaining it better, I had to make him understand why I had really come to him. Why I needed his help.

He was still pissing, and bitching and moaning about my eternal soul and John 3:16, and some other shit, I think he switched to Latin for a while, and was talking to some chick named Mary. I don't know, it did not make a whole lot of sense. I had to get him back on track. "Uh Ron, hey Ronald excuse me, but I wasn't really finished yet. Don't you think you'd better hear the whole story before you send me to hell, or forgive me?"

Father Ronald got really quiet. What kind of man was sitting before him? How could there be more? My god he had videotaped the rape of his sister! He was obviously aroused by what he had done. This was not going to be easy. Reaching a man like Jaz would be impossible, if he did not have the help of the almighty. Father Ronald was strong in his faith. He would find a way to help this man. God would not have brought them together if there was no hope.

"I'm sorry my son, please continue", he said in his mildest tone. John explained how his lust, and obsession grew every day, how his frustration began to consume him. Eventually, pictures, and videos, and memories of his little sister, just were not enough. He needed more. It was selfish and even a little cruel but Jaz tried to be honest, he was no hypocrite.

"As much as I wanted to fuck my sister again, to hear he scream, and beg, to hold her down while I stripped her and fucked her...I don't think I could have if it wasn't for my mom. It was about a month after I first fucked Susan. Spring break was coming up and Susan was coming home from school. Two days before she got home mom's sister had a heart attack. She was flying out to be with her. Dad insisted on going with her. Mom wanted me to make the two-hour drive home and spend some time with Susan, so she would not be alone. I don't know where the lie came from. It was inspired, instinctive.

"Sorry mom but I can't get away. I have a project at work due and I have to stay here. I'll call her though and check up on her from time to time. Now don't worry about us, Aunt Beth needs you now. I love you mom."

My parents caught a plane Friday morning. I went to work as usual, at 5:30 I got off then I started my car checked to make sure my rape kit was in the back seat, and made the drive to my parent's house. I parked my car in the grocery store parking lot around the corner from my house, and called Susan on my cell phone, we chatted for around 20 minutes and I said I was sorry I could not make the drive down. I told her to call me if she got lonely. I was going out but would have my cell phone on. We hung up and I walked home.

I climbed the back fence and unlocked the door. I then put my ski mask on, and the 4-inch lifts to my shoes. I doused my self with cheap perfume, to disguise my scent. I walked in to the house, and could hear the stereo playing in Susan's room. I climbed the stairs and entered her room. She had her eyes closed and was singing "Say my name, say my name", or something like that. I turned off the stereo. She opened her eyes and looked up at the 6ft 7inch monster towering over her. Fear and respect were written on her face. I think she knew right away that a man like me would not be denied.

"Oh my god, please don't hurt me, please don't hurt me," she begged in a humble, breathless voice.

I backed her up against the bed and made her sit down without saying a word. I pulled out my black masking tape from my rape bag and wrapped several layers around her eyes. I then taped her ears, just enough to help muffle my voice. It was perfect! She could not see me, or hear my voice clearly. Her rapist was 4 inches taller than I was. Not to mention her loving brother was 150 miles away, she had just talked to me on the phone.

I quickly undressed.

Susan was wearing a sheer satin baby doll nighty. She looked so sexy, I almost left it on her but...I wanted to see her naked flesh, to feel the heat coming from her skin. I would allow nothing to come between her body, and mine. I had the right to see every inch of my sister, she would show me all of her, her most intimate secrets would be open to me. I pulled it off of her slowly.

Susan was shaking, little whimpers and shivers escaped her lips. I wanted to make this last, I wanted to make my sister cum for her rapist, to want me, to need me. I made her lay flat on her back, naked on her bed. Her chest was rising rapidly and her sweet nipples were erect from fear. I needed to kiss her, to possess her tasty wet mouth.

I covered her with my body, and began kissing her slowly, tenderly, lovingly. I did not want her to catch her breath. I kept telling her how beautiful she was, how badly I needed her. I licked and sucked and nibbled on her mouth for 20 minutes. I kept instructing her to kiss me back. I did not curse, or scare her. This was my little sister and I would never hurt her. I got an urge to feel more of her, so I pulled her into my lap and sat up. I just held her warm naked body for a long time. She could not see, or hear but she could feel me.

If you have never just held a beautiful woman you don't know what you are missing. It was so romantic. I gently cupped her breasts. My fingers were lightly tracing her fat nipples. Every once in a while she would ask me to stop, to let her go. She was crying prettily the way women do when they are extremely sad, or happy.

I know it is not PC but-well I enjoyed hearing her cry as I prepared to make love to her. In a weird way it was exciting. I softly kissed her neck and hugged her closer. I assured her that she belonged to me, and I would never let her go. My dick was pressing into her bottom hard and soon, I knew that I had to taste her. I positioned my sister on her stomach and gently spread her ass open. Her anal scent was intoxicating. I bent close to her and sniffed her deeply.

Soon I began licking, and tonguing her ass. She struggled at first, so I stopped and massaged her sweet ass for a while. Susan had a fat, juicy handful, and it was perfect for kneading and licking. I kept telling her that it would be ok, that I would not hurt her. I felt her calm down, slowly. Susan was beginning to trust me, to accept my right to her body.

I peeled her ass open again and she allowed me to happily munch on her butt flesh, until she came. I did not let her relax. I sat up again and made her straddle my lap, facing me. My cock was bumping around between her thighs. I was kissing her, sucking her tongue into me.

Gradually she kissed me back. I squeezed her breasts together and rubbed them hard. I think she came again. It was time. I wanted to fuck my Susan. I asked her for permission. I could tell that she wanted me to...but she said no. She started begging me not to fuck her. She was so cute with her pussy dripping naked, and wet on my lap, my hard cock inches away.

Shit, did she really think I wasn't going to fuck her silly?! Ha ha, tee hee,(giggle, giggle snort, snort) God how I loved my goofy little sister. I hugged her tight and bent down to suck on her nipples for a little while.

Then I put her hand on my cock and made her help me guide it into her vagina. She struggled a little bit as I filled her, but I made her sit down on me, and soon I was balls deep. She tried to get off my lap but I held her in place where she belonged. I sat completely still, trying for control. This was not going to be a selfish act. I wanted to bring Susan pleasure too. I found her clit and lightly brushed it with my fingertips. I kept repeating the phrase, "I love you baby, you're so good, just relax, let me have you. Shh, you have to honey, you have to, let me love you."

She squealed in dismay as another orgasm slipped out of her. Clit/tit stimulation works very well on my little sister. There was a steady cum trickle, streaming out of her now. I needed to kiss her some more so I did, while pulling her snug down into my lap, onto my throbbing cock. I devoured her pink little tongue and sucked her, while slowly fucking her sloppy cunt.

I could hear Susan squishing, and sloshing with my precum and her own succulent juices. A part of me wanted to rip her pussy apart, to pound her nice and hard, and nasty. A small dark part of me wanted to hear her shriek, howl, to lick the fear from her body to drink in her screams, and feast on her pain. I kind of liked it when she said no, and I forced her to succumb to me anyway.

She was so submissive. From the very beginning she had only put up a token resistance. She knew she was mine for the taking, mine for the raping. If I wanted to I knew I could hurt Susan, I could fuck her till she bled. I wanted to spank her, break her, to hear her sobbing out of control. But I did not do that. No matter how sick my fantasies are, I know the reality. I do love Susan, I want to take care of her and make her happy. Her body brings me great pleasure, and I enjoy returning the favor. I sucked Susan slowly, rubbing her, loving her to a final massive orgasm that I shared.

My cum came in a warm flood, that bathed her pussy in her brother's sincere appreciation. She collapsed in my arms and we fell asleep.

I woke up first (good thing!).

I couldn't believe that I was horny again, but I was. I kissed Susan awake, and led her to our parent's large sunken bathtub. I applied some more tape and played in Susan's pussy while we waited for the tub to fill with steaming hot water. I helped her get in. It was too hot for her and she wanted to get out but I insisted. I held her tight against me and told her not to move, she groaned and cried for a while but finally got used to it. I pulled her up in my lap and slipped my dick inside of her to help her relax. I told her to kiss me, to make love to me. She tried. Susan did kiss me a little and rub my chest, but she just would not ride me, fuck herself on my cock properly. I was starting to get a little pissed. I decided to give her some incentive.

"Fuck me good baby or I am going to rape your pretty little ass next." Of course I would never have done it (um, at least I don't think I would). But it worked. Susan began humping me hard, kissing and sucking me wildly.

I met her thrust for thrust. It didn't take long for me to cum inside her again. I wrapped her tight in my arms and we soaked in the tub for about a half hour. I helped my sister use the bathroom and then fixed her something to eat. I made love to her 6 more times that weekend. I got to know every inch of her body.

I took my Polaroid out and took several nasty pictures of Susan. I have a lovely shot of her blindfolded, on her knees, crying, while sucking my cock. My favorite is the one where she is on all fours, holding her ass wide open for me. I also set up my brand new hand held video camera and got hours of film. I warned her that if she went to the police the pictures would be released. She agreed to keep things between us.

Susan cooperated, she sucked my cock, and let me eat her pussy several times. I fucked her cunt, missionary and doggie style. She let me eat her sweet ass over and over but...she never quite initiated our love making, and that hurt. Sometimes she would cry and ask when I would let her go, but I knew deep down she loved me, she had to! I know I had technically raped my sister, even though she had wanted me, she did say "no" and I know, no means no, no matter what she really wanted.

That bothered me. I mean I loved her and she was so selfish, she could not give me that simple satisfaction, the sheer pleasure of knowing the woman you loved, loved you in return. I really believed at some point it would stop being a rape, and just be love. Maybe I was fooling myself. A pat of me began to wonder if all her caresses, all of her sucking and fucking had been fake. I had seen Harry met Sally so I know women can fool a man into believing he is loved even though they really despise him and are laughing at him.

Ultimately that realization is what made me leave. If Susan could be so insensitive, so callous, after I had been so gentle...maybe it was time to rethink our relationship.

It was time to go. I used an entire roll of masking tape and secured her naked to the chair, to slow her down. I packed my bag, and cleaned up as best I could. I gave Susan a long, hot kiss goodbye and gave her tits and clit a bittersweet caress.

I had my cell phone on but did not get a call as I went down the interstate. I made the 2 hr return trip in 95 minutes. I was watching TV in my apt when the phone rang.

"Hey Susie, I was just thinking of you kiddo how are yah doing, bored out of your mind I bet", I joked in a teasing voice.

"Jaz...can you come home, NOW. I need you. Something bad has happened, something really bad, " she said as her voice cracked and she began to cry. "Jaz, someone broke in, and, and he hurt me. I was attacked. He, ruh, ruh, raped me!" I could hear the pain in my sister's voice and I realized that I was responsible for her suffering. I never meant for her to be hurt. I felt tears well up within me and soon I was crying too. I realized that I could have prevented this, I should have been there to protect her. In the days that followed my sister's rape became real to me. I was determined to get her through this.

"Oh Susie, honey I am so sorry, I'll be there as fast as I can. Do you want me to tell mom and dad?"

"No! you can't tell anyone. This is just between us. Jaz I need you, only you. I am so scared. Please hurry."

I drove home and soon I was holding my trembling little sister. She had been crying for hours. It was strange, I did not feel the least bit sexual to her now. I was able to hold her close, to press into her, to kiss her cheek, and did not even get hard. Her body snuggled up close to me, she nestled against me for warmth and protection. I promised her everything would be all right. By the time our parents got home on Tuesday night Susan was presentable.

She had a great idea too.

It was costing my parents $15,000 a year for her to live on campus. For half that she could move in with me. I would get a larger Apartment, and we'd live together.

Well Father, what do you think, is there hope? Do you understand why I came to you? I did not mean to hurt my sister. I thought somehow she liked it, somehow she knew it was me and enjoyed it. I know now that I was wrong. I did not make love to my sister. I raped her. It was an accident. Can god love a person like me?"

Father Ronald was a good, kind priest. But he had limits. He was god's vessel but he was still human. Hate seeped into his heart, righteous rage colored his actions for just a moment. If he had it to do over again, if he had taken a moment to pray...well things might have been different. "What kind of vile creature are you. What have you done. You dare to taint this church, this holy temple of the most high God!? You are wicked and beyond redemption! You are evil and are going to the lake of fire, there will be the weeping and gnashing of your teeth for all eternity. I cannot help scum like you. Get out, get OUT, GET OUT!!" he shrieked in near hysteria.

I had come to god for help, for understanding and forgiveness and this is what I got. I felt like beating the shit out of that fucking priest. Who did he think he was talking to me like that. I have never been so angry in my life. I was seething, boiling, waiting to erupt, wanting to explode. I left his church that night, and turned my back on god forever. A part of me admitted that as much as I wanted absolution, I knew it was a long shot. What I secretly wanted was confirmation from the good father.

Was I evil?

Yes I am!

There is a freedom that comes when you admit that. A rush of power that suffuses your body. I felt it bubble up inside of me and pour out in joyous laughter. All the guilt and tears, and sadness and self-doubt-that shit was gone. I fucked my sister because she was hot, and tasty and sexy. Period. I don't care if she is my baby sister or not. I like fucking her. Her tits taste sweet. I enjoy sucking on them. She is so warm and snug in my arms, she belongs with me, her body is a perfect fit. I love every whimper, how she struggles, and recoils from my touch.

Susan's pussy needs a hard cock in it. I truly believe she won't be happy unless she is crammed full of my dick meat. The more I thought about it, the more I wanted to dominate her completely. I wanted to shove my fat 8 incher up her juicy little ass and hear her scream, beg, pant, cry-for release, for a mercy that would never come. Over the next few days I immersed myself in my new video collection. As I played Susan's rapes over and over in living color, I realized one thing was missing.

I wanted her to know it was me.

I needed her to know how badly she had been betrayed. I knew it would break her, it would fracture her psyche. When she was completely devastated, utterly humiliated I would reach out my hand and claim her as my own. Susan belonged to me, and it was time she learned it. Every day that she lived with me, slept in my apt, in the room down the hall, I resisted the urge to rape her. Every day that she was naked and wet in my shower, I wanted to walk in the bathroom, open the door and drag her screaming, with shampoo in her eyes to my bed.

It would be delicious to see the shocked look on her face, those beautiful eyes swelling with tears, in denial, and pain and anger, and finally sweet acceptance. I had fought the desire to become truly, irrevocably evil as hard as I could, but now that fucking priest showed me it did not matter. I was already lost, beyond hope.

Tonight would be the night I made her mine forever. Susan would learn her place, there was no doubt about that. But dear Father Ronald had lessons to learn too. I would make him pay dearly for his cruelty. I would find a way to make him curse god, to hate his precious church, and renounce his vows.

A wicked smile warmed me as I unlocked my Apartment door. My sister was making dinner for us. She saw me come in and smiled. I came up behind her and hugged her around her waist. She relaxed in my arms for a moment. Susan looked over her shoulder and into my eyes. I saw the love, the trust of my only sister staring back at me. I smiled and cupped both of her breasts. She was still looking at me, I watched her expression change. She did not even struggle as disbelief and utter denial rocked her to her core.

The light in her eyes went out.

"No! No, no!" was all she could say as her voice trailed off to a whisper. "Susan, we have to talk," I said gently as I massaged her nipples, held her close and poked her in her yummy little butt, with Jaz junior.

The End