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April 2001

Wednesday, April 25th

Well, it's been a long week. J and I spent the week with J's parents and we managed to produce plenty of new material for me to write about. One of the greatest moments of that week was of course (and J will kill me for telling you this) the moment when we were getting heavy in J's car and a security car went by. My cry of 'He's not turning in, don't worry, he's not turning in....HE'S TURNING IN!!!!', followed by a mad dash for the front seat and driving like maniacs before we got caught keeps reducing J and me into fits of giggles whenever we mention it.

Now that I'm back, I did, of course, bump into both Philli and Victoria. Philli asked me how my trip was, though I'm not sure how she knew I was going away, and proceeded to smile radiantly when I told her I had a good time. Victoria has apparently also been away, playing in concerts. She is a very good musician and often seems to take time out of hours to pursue it. They both looked stunning, of course. My head is currently filled with thoughts of J, so I'm not looking as much as I normally do. I'm sure that will pass, though.

Tuesday, April 10th

I haven't seen Victoria or Philli for a few days, and I think I'm in withdrawal. I really miss watching Philli's face when she smiles, or the way the sun shines off Victoria's hair, making it even brighter than usual. I hope you like the new graphic of my eye that J did. Hopefully it will be the first of many.

Saturday, April 7th

It's bad enough being tormented by day, but at night as well!! I dreamt about Victoria last night. I dreamt that we were out walking together and talking, and she told me that she wasn't straight. I think it was a big part wishful dreaming. She was radiant in this dream, I can't remember how her hair was, but I know that it was that glorious red colour, and that it shone like silk. She is completely out of my league, she would be even if she wasn't straight. It's so unfair! But I guess there are a lot of people who aren't in my league either. I just wish that Victoria was more... approachable. I'll tell her one day, and then I'll go home to J. I know I can't have her, I don't even really want her. I just wish she wasn't so damn attractive!

Thursday, April 5th

I know every single part of Philli's face. I can see her in perfect detail. I must have spent half an hour staring at her today. It's not often that I'm in a position to do so, so I made the most of it. I want to know what her skin feels like, her face has flawless skin, all smooth and creamy. I found myself looking and imagining what it would be like to be behind her, kissing her neck, kissing her sweet, sensuous mouth. You can totally tell I've been thinking about this! It's a nice daydream, but I prefer the reality that waits for me at home.

Tuesday, April 3rd

Victoria. Seeing her for fifteen seconds with her hair down is the most incredible thing I've seen (except J's ass) in my life. She is so beautiful, and she doesn't even know it. Alan told me today that he would like to see me and Victoria together, and I don't think he was talking about the male fantasy point of view. I would love to be with her, but I have J, and that's what I need. Although I love to stare and fantasise. I didn't see Richard or Philli today. Just Victoria.

Monday, April 2nd

Today was a nice day. Bright sunshine, beautiful women, who could want for more? I was talking to Victoria for a while today. She had an 'interesting' birthday. Seems that she and some of her other friends went to a restaurant and got a bit rowdy! I hope there's good photographical evidence! I have a friend called Alan, who I constantly winge to when I like someone that I have no hope of getting, and he caught me staring at Philli today, although I'm aware that he sympathises with my dilemma. She really does have a fantastic ass. I could close my eyes and relate to you exactly what both Philli and Victoria were wearing today. When I spend time near them, or even just see them walking along somewhere, I'll instantly take in every  detail. I don't know why. Odd, isn't it? Other things to note- saw a tall woman with curly black hair walking down some stairs. Very attractive. If I ever see her again I'll have to find out who she is. I know it's a look-no-touch thing, but looking is a hell of a lot of fun!