The Ties That Bind
By Waddie
Greywolf
Postscript ~
Little Beau Peep
Weaving olden dances
Mingling hands and mingling glances
Till the moon has taken flight
To and fro we leap
And chase the frothy bubbles
Whilst the world is full of troubles
And is anxious in it's sleep
Come away oh human child
To the waters and the wild
For the world's more full of weeping
Than you can understand
W. B. Yeats
When we were taking over the shop and forming our corporation, one
of my stipulations in putting up the money was Dad Jake would be
taken in as an equal partner. Everyone agreed, plus I agreed to
foot the bill for operating expenses for the first six months.
When we called him in the office to tell him, he thought we were
going to fire him because we wouldn’t need him any more. I razzed
his ass mercilessly about not having faith in his boy. He cried
when we told him he would be an equal partner. He stood to make
twice as much money as he did in the past. Our announcement
couldn't have come at a better time, he needed it as Anita gave
birth to their seventh child, a beautiful boy, about a year and a
half before. She was in poor health and wasn't responding to
treatment.
The child was named Samuel Beaureguard Red Feather Raggazzi. We
jokingly called him Little Red Sambeau, but he came to be known as
Little Beau. Over the years his brothers and sisters started
calling him ‘Little Beau Peep.’ As often happens, a silly nickname
will stick. He was good natured about it even when the adults
started calling him ‘Peeps.’ So he was known as ‘Little Beau’ or
‘Peeps.’ The Dungeon Master Big Jim, Master Earl, Chief, and I
were his Godfathers. We attended his Baptism. Master Earl was on
patrol on his motorcycle and stopped by the Catholic Church on his
afternoon coffee break to attend the service. He was wearing his
handsome LAPD uniform.
The attending Priest didn’t know what to think. “Now, let me see
if I understand this,” the priest said and paused for a minute to
muse to himself, “this boy child will have four Godfathers; one’s
a giant, one’s an Indian Chief, one’s a Los Angeles Police
Officer, and the fourth is a Vietnam war hero and body builder?”
the Priest asked laughing and added, “Lucky Little boy, he must be
very special,” he allowed. We assured him he was.
Anita was already going through menopause when she got pregnant.
Every physician they consulted advised against having the baby.
They told her she must abort. It was just too risky. Being a good
Catholic, she wouldn’t hear of it. There were complications, and
she never fully recovered. She remained ill and in poor health
until she died two years later. Dad Jake never married again. He
and I continued to carry on with each other once or twice a month
in a small apartment at the back of the shop Chief and I fixed up
for emergency sleep-overs in Silverlake. My master knew, if I
worked late, chances were Dad Jake was going to tear off a piece
of my ass. Master Earl never got upset or tried to stop me from
giving Jake comfort. He considered Jake a part of my extended
family and included him in a lot of things at the house. Jake
loved my master and was grateful to him for his graciousness and
generosity.
Jake was left with seven kids and no wife. Master Earl, Chief, the
Dungeon Master, and even Master Jeb helped out as much as we
could. Our entire biker family helped Jake out at one time or
another. He finally hired a lady in the neighborhood to take care
of the two smallest ones and his sister helped as much as she
could. His oldest daughter graduated high school and was still
living at home. She took over a lot of responsibilities.
After Master Earl’s death and my head was finally retrieved from
my ass, I became the Dungeon Master’s property and we lived
together for a number of years on Mt. Washington. It wasn’t far
from Dad Jake’s and we were all the time taking the kids somewhere
to give him a break. Chief and I would go over a couple of times a
week and help out with laundry, cooking, and cleaning. If he and
the Dungeon Master had any slaves in training they were taken
along for “Community Service Work.” At least that’s what we told
them. No one ever complained. Everyone was glad to help out.
Anything that needed to be done we tried to do to help. The
Ragazzi kids began to think of the Mt. Washington clan as family.
We practically raised those kids.
The favorite of everyone was the baby of the family, Little Beau.
He quickly learned who Chief, Big Jim, Earl, and I were and our
relationship to him as his Godfathers. He became the family mascot
of the Mt. Washington clan. He was riding on a Harley before he
could walk. Half his clothes and toys were on the mountain. Any of
the family who came to visit always brought a gift or toy for
Little Beau.
Little Beau was our constant companion and helper. He could get us
to do anything by batting his big brown eyes. He looked a lot like
his mother. Peeps was even tempered and loved everybody. He was
almost too pretty too be a little boy, but he exuded a masculinity
that was as powerful as his old man’s. He grew the prettiest long
eye lashes that curled up like someone used a curler on them and
he got teased unmercifully in school; however, he was so quick
witted, good natured, and laid back he never took offense. He was
soon one of the most popular kids in his school.
I loved him from the minute I laid eyes on him as a baby. I knew
he would be special. I also knew, by the time he was five years
old, he was going to grow up gay. I talked to Jake and asked him
if he was showing Little Beau enough attention. I warned him all
the signs were there. He must do something. He was the only one
who could show him the masculine love that baby needed. I preached
to him until he’d get so angry he’d shake his fist at me and curse
in Italian. I’d yell back at him, “Well, if you didn’t want us to
care for Peeps you shouldn’t have made us his Godfathers, but you
did, we are, so live with it,” I'd shout at him. He’d think about
it for a while then we’d break up laughing at the absurdity of it
all. Maybe little Beau was genetically meant to be gay, who knows?
Jake tried but he just had real problems showing the child
affection because he secretly blamed Little Beau for Anita’s
death. The kid knew it, too. He weren't no dummy. He had a brain
up in lights.
Little Beau attached himself to us. He slowly grew apart from his
father but loved him deeply. He just didn’t know how to get his
dad to love him. He couldn’t. It wasn't his fault. He tried
everything in his power to gain his old man's love. As he grew
into young manhood he developed the body of a young God; dark,
swarthy olive complexion, a face by Michelangelo, and like his old
man, he boasted a sizable member between his legs. He was one of
the most popular kids in his high school. The girls adored him,
and so did the boys. He could do no wrong. He wanted to be good at
sports and begged Chief and I teach him how to play ball. He was
forever hounding us to play catch with him with a baseball or a
football. He got to be pretty good. He was on the team in high
school and Chief, Big Jim, and I never missed a game.
We had to physically drag Jake to a game. He didn’t want to go. He
just didn’t care. Little Beau was crushed. He work and played
hard, and got really good so his dad would be proud of him. He was
a better athlete than any of his brothers. We would brag about a
play he made, Peeps would be beaming from the praise and his dad
would shoot him down. “It was okay, but your brother could have
done better," he'd tossed of thoughtlessly. Jake could be
thoughtlessly mean spirited and heartless sometimes. The truth of
the matter was, his brother couldn’t have done better. I chewed
that old man’s ass out until he couldn’t believe some of the words
that came out of his adopted son’s mouth. I told him I was ashamed
to call him my dad anymore. He got the message, especially after I
cut off sex with him.
I finally told Little Beau to give up. If his dad was to come
around he would, but I insisted Peeps must let go for his own
sake. By the time, he got to secondary school, we offered him a
place to live on the mountain with us. He thought about it,
thanked us graciously, but couldn't bring himself to leave his old
man. The kid even went so far as to try to take the place of a
wife for Jake. He learned to cook and had dinner waiting for his
dad every evening he was in high school.
He washed his dad’s clothes, folded them, put them away. He saw me
taking care of my master's boots and asked me to teach him how. He
kept all of his dad's boots clean and polished. He washed and
waxed his dad’s truck every week. He mowed the lawn, did yard
clean-up, fixed, painted and generally ran the house. His dad
never even offered him an allowance. His Godfathers slipped him
money on the side. I gave him money. Chief gave him money. Big Jim
gave him money. Each time he would faithfully tell us, “But Beau,
Big Jim and Chief have already given me money.”
"Damn, it, Peeps! Keep a' you mouth shut, caro mio, and take it,”
I admonished him in my best Godfather imitation. I’d stuff it in
his pocket. It always got me a hug and a kiss. He graduated from
high school second in his class of four hundred students. His dad
announced he wasn't going to the graduation. Chief, the Dungeon
Master, and I told him if he wanted to live to see the sun rise
the next day, there would be no argument, he would get dressed
appropriately, and be ready at the appointed time. We would
personally escort him to make sure he attended, if we had to tie
him to a chair and throw his big wop-ass, chair and all, in the
back of my master's truck.
Jake was smart enough to know when we meant business, but what
really convinced him was the anger Chief radiated toward him. He
never saw Godfather Chief really angry before. With no emotion,
Chief asked Jake if he ever saw pictures of a man who was scalped?
"It ain't pretty, Jake," he said. Later Jake told me he never
wanted to see Chief angry again either. He was scared to death
that big Indian was going to scalp him if he didn’t do as we told
him. I would have handed Chief the knife.
We took Little Beau to a lot of the family gatherings over the
years. He knew the score and had no problem throwing his clothes
off with me, Charlie, Blaine, the eunuchs, Will, and Button. (he
loved Button) All the family knew and loved him. We don’t know how
they found out, but there was a contingency of about fifty bad-ass
bikers attended his graduation who stood and yelled for him when
he walked across the stage to get his diploma. His dad was
impressed these guys thought enough of his kid to come to his
graduation. Little Beau was thrilled beyond words they came and
were carrying him around on their shoulders afterwards. It did a
lot for his image among his peers as well. His classmates were
impressed.
* * * * * * *
Several years after his graduation we sold the house on Mt.
Washington and bought a huge estate in San Diego County with
several houses and big garages with apartments over them. Little
Beau was still living with his dad and playing housewife. His dad
took him for granted. Little Beau helped us move and was around us
a lot that month. He always insisted he had to be home for his dad
to take care of him. He did spend several nights away with us in
San Diego with his dad’s permission. Here he was twenty-one and
still asking his dad’s permission for every move he made. He never
complained. He just graciously accepted it was his lot while
living in his father's house.
That weekend I asked him what he wanted to do with his life. He
told me he wanted to go to college to become a veterinarian, but
his dad said it would be too expensive. We knew Jake put four of
the kids through college with no sweat. They weren’t half as
intelligent or bright as Little Beau. They didn’t make near the
grades Beau made in high school. Jake was making damn good money
from the shop.
We were approached by a larger firm to buy us out at a huge profit
so we decided to sell. Everyone could retire in comfort from what
we got. Jake ended up with enough to be comfortable the rest of
his life but wouldn’t agree to put the kid through college.
Partner or no, I was about ready to write Jake off. I was angry.
Chief was angry. The Dungeon Master was livid. I asked one
question of them both and before I could get it out of my mouth,
they yelled an answer in unison.
“What if we...?”
“Yes!” they exclaimed in reply.
We simply moved Little Beau in with us and told his father he
would be attending U.S.C. (San Diego) in the fall for Veterinary
Medicine. If he wanted to see him he would have to come down. Jake
didn’t seem to care one way or the other. Except now, he was
alone. Once in a while we’d get a phone call from Jake in an
evening to see how we were doing, but he would never ask a word
about Little Beau. We didn't let his incurious behavior put us
off, we would tell him about Little Beau; he was doing well and
making top grades. We were so proud of him. Jake never once asked
to speak to the boy. Little Beau finished his freshman year at the
top of his class, and we couldn’t have been happier.
We bought him a small car, and he loved it. He was beginning to
have sex with guys and wanted to know if we would. We told him we
didn’t think it would be a good idea because we were his
Godfathers and so close to his old man, but we had no problem with
him finding someone else in the family. God help us, he picked old
Sarge to fall in love with as a Master/mentor. Wouldn’t you know?
Titus and Button welcomed him into the family. That dirty old man,
Sarge, taught the kid about good sex. How to give it, and how to
take it. He taught him well, and I’ll have to give the old fart
his due, no one could have done it better than Sarge.
I spent many a wonderful, happy evening riding his cock calling
him every name that came to my head to get him to fuck me harder.
He never let me down. Then he’d have me trade places with him.
He’d get into the sling, and I’d slam my old cock into him as hard
as I could. Sarge would tell me I could come up his butt, but if I
didn’t get him off the second time when I shot, he was going to
cut my dick and balls off. I never failed him either. I told
everyone I had no doubt that filthy old pervert would do exactly
what he said he was going to do to me so I had to bust his ass to
make sure he got what he needed. Then, we’d both roar with
laughter. We laughed for years together about our bonding and the
sex games we played. Then one night he passed away in his sleep.
No one in our family expected it.
God, I loved that old man. Sarge was like a second dad to me. I
cried more at his funeral than I did my Masters. Why? Because I
learned to let go; how to get it out. I had to. I didn't have
another choice. My love, Big Beryl, wasn’t around any more to take
me to the barn to use his twelve-foot black-snake whip on my ass
to take my mind off my misery so I could start living again. In
memory of one of the finest men I ever knew or played with, Sarge
was a man among men. I miss him today with all my heart, and I
can’t stop the tears as I write this. Under that gruff, mean, foul
mouthed, facade beat the heart of one of the kindest, gentlest,
caring, giving men I ever had the pleasure to know.
I accompanied Little Beau to Los Angeles to visit his father the
end of his freshman year at U.C.S.D. His grades were tops in his
class. I left him with his dad and went to visit friends. Bull and
Charlie were moving to the San Diego area to be nearer to us. I
spent several days with them helping pack and and several with Sam
and Doctor Yoshie. I had a good time. I called Jake’s house and
Little Beau answered. He was reserved, and said he was ready for
me to pick him up. I drove by and Jake was all over me hugging and
kissing me. He said he was so glad to see me again. I noticed as
we left Jake never tried to hug Little Beau, give him a kiss, or
tell him ‘goodbye.’ I just figured they said their ‘goodbyes’
before I got there.
Little Beau got into the truck and quietly closed the door to wait
for me. It was a quiet, introspective ride back to San Diego. I
wanted to reach out to him, but I didn’t know how. I decided to
let things be and be there if he needed me. Just beyond San
Clemente, near the nuclear reactors, Little Beau kept looking at
the ocean with his face turned away from me. It was getting dark,
but I could occasionally see his face reflected in the window.
There were tears running down his cheeks, but he didn’t want me to
see he was crying. I pulled off into a rest area near the San
Onofre Beach. I got out, used the head, and came back to the
truck. I went to the passenger side and told him to get out, we
were going to take a walk. He looked like a seventy-five year old
man who had the burdens of the world on his little shoulders.
I made him take his boots off. I took mine off, and we threw them
behind the seat. We walked down to the ocean and hand in hand we
walked along the beach in the sand with water coming up to our
feet every now and then. He wouldn’t talk. A full moon was rising
and we were walking far away from the few on the beach. I knew the
child, the boy, the young man walking beside me so well he
could’ve been my own son. In many ways, I felt he was. I certainly
wished he was my progeny. My heart ached for him, but I didn’t
know what to do. What could I say to him? I was his dad's
part-time sex-slave for years. Jake freely gave me the love Peeps
needed for himself but never got.
I’ve always been told to follow my heart. I grabbed him, pulled
him to me, and kissed him hard with a tender, lingering kiss. At
first he was shocked and a bit surprised. He stiffened but then
relaxed and allowed himself to flow into his Godfather. He knew I
understood without saying a word. It opened the flood gates on
both sides of the damn. His and mine. We were reduced to holding
each other and letting it all come out. Our tears mingled with the
same salinity as the ocean waters that washed against our bare
feet. I gently let him go and held him at arms length to speak to
him.
“Peeps, I don’t care what happened. I don’t wanna’ know. I’d
probably go back and kick the worthless old bastard’s ass, but one
thing you have to know is you have a large family, natural and
extended, who love and care about you. I ain't just talking about
your Godfathers but your brother’s and sister’s too. There ain’t a
week goes by we don’t get a call from one or all of them wanting
to know how you’re doing and if they can help in any way. Hell,
they’ve been down here to visit us and you more’n they have your
old man. I am and always will be your number one fan and cheering
section. I am, after all, your Godfather. Chief is number two and
the Dungeon Master is number three. Sarge is a close runner up,” I
said. He laughed. He looped his elbow through mine and we walked
some more down the beach.
“Nothing happened, Beau,” Peeps said quietly, “absolutely nothing.
If he was mad at me about something it would have been all right,
but there was nothing.” He broke into tears as we walked. “I
cleaned the house. I fixed breakfast, lunch, and dinner for him. I
washed his clothes. I cleaned and shined his boots. I washed,
vacuumed, and waxed his truck. I cleaned up the yard. I washed,
dried, and folded his clothes, but he didn’t thank me for
anything. Never said I did a good job or even a bad one. He just
doesn’t love me, Beau, and I have always tried hard to win his
love. I guess I just realized this weekend, I can’t do it any
more, Beau. I just don't wanna' try no more,” he said. He was
devastated. I was too. I couldn’t imagine what had come over the
man. He wasn't the Dad Jake I knew and loved all those years. To
do this to his own flesh and blood was totally unacceptable. Why
didn’t he just tell the kid to fuck off, I don’t want to be
bothered by you anymore. It would be kinder than what he was doing
to him. By completely ignoring Peeps, in essence, Jake was cutting
the kids balls off.
“What did he do while you were there, Beau?” I asked.
“Nothing but watch television. He never talked to me. Never said
more than a handful of words. He grunted several times and farted
twice. Even when we ate, he never asked how I was doing in school.
Nothing. Just got up, put his plate in the sink and went back to
his T.V. I tried to talk to him several times, but he hushed
me up telling me he wanted to see what was on T.V. I gave up. I
went and found something else to clean. That was my vacation with
my dad, Beau.” He kind of giggled a disappointed little laugh. “I
don’t know what I expected. He never has paid any attention to
me,” Peeps lamented, “but like a fool I kept trying. I keep
telling myself, one day soon, he will wake up and love me, but I'm
afraid he's waited too long,” Peeps said.
“Look, I told you to stop trying. Next time don’t “do” for him.
Just sit and make him nervous. Just be strong and sit there until
you get a reaction, then go from there. Beat him at his own sick
game. I’ve known your dad a Hell of a lot longer than you, and I
know what pulls his strings.”
“Beau? Why does my dad love you so much? He brightens up every
time you come around. He’s never done that for me. Did you and my
dad have a ‘thing’ at one time?” he asked.
“By ‘thing,’ do you mean sex?” I asked in reply.
“Yes, sir,” Peeps replied.
“We’ll, I’m too damn mad at your dad to protect him any longer,
and you know me so well you’d know in a minute if I lied to you;
besides you’re old enough you deserve to know truth. Yes, we did.
For many years, I was your dad's part-time slave. We never crossed
the barrier between gay and straight. He was a straight master who
liked to use and be serviced by a male slave. While we loved each
other deeply, we approached it from different perspectives. Didn't
matter none. What mattered was we meet in the middle, and it
worked for us. I serviced your dad two to three times a week up
until Master Earl was killed. My master knew about Jake and our
bond and accepted your dad as part of our family. I won’t lie to
you, Peeps, ‘cause I’ve come to love you more than I ever loved
your dad and that was a powerful lot at one time.
"There was a small, single apartment at the back of the shop which
hadn’t been used for years. Sam originally fixed it up for Yoshie
to hide in when he first escaped Breed years ago. Chief and I
fixed it up, ‘cause it had an outside entry, and we could use it
if we got stuck in Hollywood for the night. Or Chief could use it
if he didn’t want to bring a trick back to Mt. Washington, he
could take him there. We painted, redid the floor and made it
comfortable. We put an air conditioning unit for comfort and redid
the bath to make it nice. Someone could have lived there. After I
showed it to your dad, he and I started to use it after work when
our schedules allowed. Maybe twice a week, sometimes three, I took
care of him all those years. I haven’t been with him since you
were in junior high school, and I saw what he was doing to you.
I’m sorry Beau, but I love you deeply and just couldn’t have sex
with Jake while I watched him reject you,” I said.
“I never knew. Now it makes things more clear. I would’ve never
guessed you and my dad...” he couldn't finish.
“Don’t hate me, Darlin,’ I couldn’t stand that. It would break my
heart, I love you so much,” I said. I held him tightly in my arms.
“I don’t, Beau, but it does tell me something. He’s still in love
with you, and I’m just an echo of that love. I killed his wife and
then I destroyed your love for him. No wonder he hates me,” he
said and started crying again.
“I promise you, Peeps, I’ll make it up to you somehow,” I said to
him.
“You already have, Beau. Look what you’re doing for me. You guys
are so kind and giving. I can’t even look at something I might
like or one of you will buy it for me. No young man could ask for
better Godfathers, but you’re more like three big brothers. Hell,
I love you guys like I could never love my old man. You guys were
always there if I needed anything or a shoulder to cry on. I
didn’t realize until I was older how many weekends you guys gave
up to see to my happiness. You guys became my dads. I wanted dad
to love me. I wanted to love him, but it’s hard when you get
nothing in return, Beau,” he said through his tears. I held him as
he cried some more. “Tell me, Beau?” He looked at me with those
killer brown eyes of his. “If you had sex with my old man, why
won’t you ‘get down’ with me?” he asked. He was right. He mentally
grabbed me by the gonads. If I really loved him as I claimed, why
was I denying him what he probably needed from me?
“Would it help if we were intimate?” I asked softly and stole a
kiss from him.
“I need to be loved this evening. I need love from someone, and
I’d rather it be you than any person on this Earth,” he said.
“You know what, Tiger? I need you, too,” I replied. We kissed
again. I’d never been intimate with Little Beau before that
evening, but I felt we both needed it. I stopped and got us a
motel room in Carlsbad and called back to Bear Park. (our name for
our place) I told my master we were stopping for the night, ‘cause
we were tired. Neither wanted to drive any more. There was a show
on cable I didn’t want to miss. My master knew me so well by that
time he understood from a few well chosen words it was a
‘situation.’
“Ya’ll have fun now, y’hear?” the Dungeon Master said laughing as
he hung up the phone. My master knew me too well and understood
Peeps needed me. Little Beau and I made love five times that
night. He couldn’t get enough, and I couldn’t fill him enough.
Sarge is one Hell of a teacher. I bought him a box of those
god-awful cigars he loves after that night with Peeps, but never
told him why. Little Beau and Big Beau fell in love that night. We
bonded, and I knew I would never let anything bad happen to him
again as long as I was alive. He slowly became more our son than
he was Jake’s. I wasn’t going to let Jake hurt him anymore either.
The end of Little Beau’s Sophomore year came and went. That summer
he spent with us or the family. I occasionally had sex with him.
The Dungeon Master and Chief began to use him every now and then.
He was learning that sex didn’t mean you had to latch on to
everyone who made a night of love to you. I don't know who he
learned it from. Maybe Sarge? He didn’t learn it from me. I still
fall in love with anyone who throws a decent fuck in me. So, I’m
weak. Peeps never once mentioned going to see his dad that summer.
The phone calls from Jake became more infrequent. The oldest
daughter called and said he was miserable because Little Beau
didn’t call or come to visit.
“Good, serves him right!” I told her then I laughed. She didn’t
want to agree but her giggle told me volumes. Jake’s kids knew
what he did to Little Beau and tried to talk with him. They all
expressed their disappointment the way their dad treated Little
Beau. Then she said, “I think he’s gonna’ drive down to visit
Little Beau.” I told her fine, we’d love to see him. He was
certainly welcome. Two days later I got a call from Jake asking if
he could come down to visit?
“Sure come on down, we got plenty of room. Stay as long as you
like,” I said.
I gave him instructions how to get to our place, and he found it
with no problem. I was so proud of Little Beau. His dad arrived,
but he didn’t run to him as usual. He walked into the room after
his dad was there for a while and simply said with no emotion,
“Hi, Dad,”and walked on through to the kitchen to get a cold
drink. He came back in and asked his dad if he could get him
anything.
“No thanks, Son,” Jake replied quietly.
“Okay, fine. You plan on staying for a while?” Peeps asked.
"Yeah, if your Godfathers will let me. I might say the night,"
Jake replied.
"That's good. Well, have a good time, and it was nice to see you
again," Peeps said without nuance, turned, and went back to his
room. Jake was visibly shaken. I looked at him with sympathy and
just shook my head.
“I need you guy’s help,” Jake said in a low voice. I was afraid of
what was coming. I had an ominous feeling, and I couldn’t have
been more right.
“Have I totally blown it with Little Beau?” Jake asked quietly.
I wasn’t going to coddle him. “Damn near, Dad. Yeah, I’d say
you’ve managed to kill ninety-five percent of any love he had for
you, and it’s real hard for any of us to have much sympathy. We
warned you for years. Do you remember the arguments you and I got
into about showing him love when he was just a toddler? You
wouldn’t listen to me. You never heard a word I said. After all,
what would a Goddamn queer-faggot know about raising a kid? What
were we to do? I wasn’t going to sit by and watch you destroy our
Godson. The only Godson, Big Jim, Chief, Master Earl, and I may
ever have.”
“You don’t have all the pieces. You don’t know everything,” Jake
countered. I didn’t like the sound of that, but I had to know. I
let him take the lead. If he wanted to tell us he would. At that
point, I really didn't give a damn, and I knew my brothers felt
the same. They were as disgusted with him as I was. Sarge was
visiting in Little Beau’s room. They were making plans for going
to the next family get-together in the desert.
Jake continued, “I blamed him for Angie’s death for years. (Anita
Angela was his wife's two first names) I couldn’t look at him when
I didn’t see her face. He looks just like her. He has the face of
an angel,” Jake said and started crying. I didn’t move to console
him. As far as we were concerned it was too little too late.
Neither did Chief, Blaine, or the Dungeon Master try to console
him. “As time went on, I couldn’t show him love because it was
like I wanted to love him like I loved Angie or you, Beau. I
wanted to hold him and have sex with him from the time he was in
grade school. When he started puberty I caught him jacking off one
afternoon. I almost went in to lay down with him to help him. I
wanted to hold him and make love to him while he was doing it. I
wanted to catch him in my mouth. I know it sounds sick, but I’m
being honest here,” Jake was doing a true confession number but
none of us were buying it; at least for the moment.
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing and then I remembered my own
dad catching me jacking off to Billy’s picture and asking if he
could help. Six degrees separation of probability? Maybe less than
that? I suddenly began to see things in a new light. He fell
deeply in love with his own son and didn’t know what to do about
it. There's no doubt it would produce a major conundrum in someone
like Jake. He knew society wouldn’t accept incest. Hell, it has a
hard enough time with homosexuality let alone to lust after your
own son. He bottled up all this without talking to a soul? He
could have talked to me of all people. No, he couldn’t have. He
knew how much we loved Little Beau and we took our God-parenting
roles seriously.
Jake continued, “When he comes home he acts like a slave to me. I
remember you and Chief talking about Will and all the things he
used do for you guys. Your descriptions of what a slave should be
stuck in my mind, and then I realized I unwittingly turned my own
son into a slave without the sex; however, for lack of a better
term, it was barren, it was lifeless. It was frightening, because
the truth is, I wanted it all with him,” he declared.
I looked at Chief and then the Dungeon Master for help. They were
staring at the floor and wouldn't look at me. Blaine shrugged his
shoulders but didn’t look sympathetic. I was stunned. What
do you say to someone who has asked for your help and thrown you
the curve of a life time? Then, I thought, why didn’t you see this
coming, Beau? You’ve known that old man for years, but you never
figured him to be an uncaring man especially to his own child.
Something had to be desperately wrong. Well, there it was staring
you in the fucking face. You just found out. Now, what the Hell
are you going to tell him?
Jake went on, “He can walk by me and his scent causes me to get
erect. Not just a little. I mean a fucking boner hard, Beau, like
I used to get with you. He has a scent just like Anita's. How is
that possible? He doesn’t use colognes or soap like she used. He
doesn’t use deodorant or hair spray like she use to. No talcs or
bath powders. No bath oils, nothing. I’ve checked everything. How
can a male child have the same damn scent his mother had? Explain
it to me if you can?” Jake asked like he was trying to make sense
of something he put off far too long.
I didn’t have an answer. I’ve pondered the role of pheromones in
sexual attraction for years but found no answers. Except, I
noticed of late the same scent from my giant master, Earl used to
have just before he wanted sex from me. Now, I can tell when the
Dungeon Master requires my services. I don’t even have to ask. I
just start taking off anything not going to be used in sex. He
asked me one day how I always knew. I told him a slave has ways of
knowing those things about his master. That scent is not from an
aftershave. It’s a sexual scent. Like my beast is getting ready to
go into rut. I can smell it in his urine. About a week ago I
passed Chief and got the same scent from him. Blaine was gone for
a week visiting with Josh, Zack, and Will in the desert. I pulled
Chief aside and asked him, “Your room, twenty minutes? Meet you
there?” I asked.
“I’d really appreciate it, Beau,” he replied with kind of an
urgent tone to his voice. I was there stripped, clean, and ready
for use. He didn’t even say a word. He knew what I was there for
and couldn’t get it into me fast enough. He used me as the slave I
was intended to be. Damn good, too, I might add. My Yavapai
brother could still bring a satisfied smile to this old slave’s
face. Later that afternoon I was doing something and humming away
while working. My Master passed by me then stopped. “Chief?” he
asked.
“Yes, Master,” I replied still working away.
“Fine,” he said and walked on smiling to himself. Now, how did he
know? He couldn’t tell me either. Could it be the same? Could it
be our bodies produce one or the other pheromones depending on the
role we need to play in sex. Is the male of our species capable of
producing both? Was Little Beau's psyche controlling his
pheromones to duplicate his mother's so he might unwittingly tempt
his dad into having sex with him. Flowers have been doing it for
eons evolving to imitate the female scent of an insect needed to
pollinate the flower; and the male insect, in his attempt to have
sex with what he thinks is another female of his species,
unwittingly pollinates the plant. Stranger things have been
noticed about the human body’s ability to produce scents.
“Dad,” I spoke softly to Jake trying to think, “Are you trying to
tell us you feel so strongly drawn to Beau you couldn’t have met a
middle ground with your son?” I asked incredulously.
“You know me, Beau, that afternoon I asked if you were free to let
me come by your apartment I knew if you let me I was gonna’ fuck
the daylights out of you. I couldn’t hold back. I’ve never been
able to hold back with you. I would go with you right now if your
master let me and you wanted me. Forgive me Jim. Beau, I’ve missed
you in the last eight years like you can’t imagine. I’ve even gone
to a couple of gay bars looking for a replacement but never left
with anyone. I knew to show Little Beau any affection I was going
to go too far. I wanted him so bad I just closed up when I was
around him,” Jake said.
About that time Sarge walked in to say ‘goodbye.’ He told us he
would talk with us before the weekend. I introduced him to Jake
and he shook his hand. “Mr Raggazzi, you have one Hell of a fine
young man for a son. He’s a good boy. You should be proud of him,”
Sarge said firmly. Jake thanked him, and I walked Sarge to the
door. I kissed Sarge on the cheek and told him he would never know
how much I loved him for what he just said to Little Beau’s dad. I
told him I would fill in the details later. I walked back into the
living area and told Jake I had to think about this, but in the
meantime let’s get him comfortable. Blaine and I needed to get
into the kitchen to start dinner. We were on K.P. duty that
evening.
“To be perfectly honest with you, Dad, I don’t know what to say,"
I said, "Am I shocked? No, not really. Does it bother me? Only in
the sense that I don’t have an honest answer for you as to how I
feel about it. I haven’t had much time to think. Can we just leave
everything on hold right now and give me a chance to think? I want
to put in a call to Master Wolf for his opinion. He helped me a
lot recently, and I want to hear his take on this. Can we get
together again after dinner and talk? We won’t say anything
to Little Beau about this and you shouldn’t either until we’ve had
a chance to talk among ourselves. Dad, we’re not here to be your
judge or jury. You and I should be the last ones to judge anyone.
Look at the clandestine love you and I shared for each other all
these years.”
Jake agreed to wait until after dinner to pursue the conversation.
I immediately put in a call to Master Wolf and got his slave Zane
on the phone. He said he was with a client but would have him give
me a call as soon as he was finished. I told him it was somewhat
of an emergency. Blaine and I began to cook dinner and Little Beau
came to the kitchen with no clothes on to help like he always did.
I pulled him aside. “Peeps, do your old Godfather a favor and go
put on some clothes since your dad is here, for his benefit,” I
asked him quietly. He thought I meant because Jake wasn't used to
seeing his kid run around naked in a houseful of grown men. “After
he’s gone you can go back to being comfortable,” I consoled him.
He started to say something and then stopped. “Yes, Master Beau,”
he replied quietly and trudged off to cover himself.
“Was he being a smart-Aleck, Blaine?” I asked.
“Don’t think so, Love. I think he sees you as his
Godfather/Master. That kid would jump through flaming hoops for
you and never ask why; with good reason, I might add. You’ve never
lied to him or told him you were gonna’ do something and didn’t,
or ask anything of him that wasn’t for his own good. Shit! Not
only him, Darlin,’ I’d jump through them flaming hoops if’n you
merely suggested it would be a good idea,” Blaine said and we
shared a good laugh at his joke, “You’ve never told me to do
anything or asked anything of me unless it was for a damn good
reason; in Nam or here. I would trust anything you told me to do
in a New York minute,” he added. The phone rang and I went to
answer as Blaine began getting dinner on the table.
“Hello, Bear Park, Big Beau speaking,” I said.
“Hey, Beau, you wanted me to call?” Master Waddie asked.
“Yes, Master Wolf, thanks for returning my call. Remember Dad
Jake? I spoke to you about him and my ongoing relationship at work
for years. Then I stopped it when he began to reject my Godson,
his youngest child?” I asked.
“Yes, I remember it well and was a bit amazed as a straight man he
jumped the fence for a gay man. Remember, I told you my experience
was, it usually was a strong single relationship with a gay man,
but he would never venture out to more partners. Exclusivity with
one male partner or female is more compatible with straight
mentality,” he replied.
“Well, Good Master, there has been a new variable. He just laid it
at our feet why he rejected his youngest son all these years,” I
said.
“I remember you told me he blamed the boy for his wife’s demise.
Is there more? No, wait, lemme' guess. His real rejection of the
kid is because he has realigned his sexuality with his son. His
son has become his wife and replaced his need for you?” he asked.
“You’re pretty damn sharp, Master Wolf,” I replied.
“That’s why you pay me the big bucks, Slave Beau. There is, by the
way, no charge for this conversation,” he said laughing. “It’s far
too interesting to sully it with money. You should be charging me
for this one,” he said and laughed again.
“Furthermore,” he continued, “The child has done everything he
could to win his father’s approval with little results and has
gone overboard in his attempts to please; much like a slave would
wish to win approval of his master by pleasing him. His dad
relates this with his experiences with you being a slave and has
subconsciously rejected him more to induce this performance from
him, right?” he asked.
“You’re batting a thousand so far, Master Wolf,” I replied.
“Then your question would be...?”
“The boy is our Godson. Our family, here in San Diego, is putting
him through college which his father refused to do for him,” I
said.
“Of course he did. He didn’t want to lose control of his little
slave. College would mean separation, knowledge, developing a more
mature self-awareness, a better image of himself complete with a
side order of cognitive thinking, logic, and reason. It might mean
an end to his power base. To Jake it’s not only threatening, it’s
frightening. He’s there to reclaim his slave and re-establish
control. He may even ask for your help,” he said.
“Exactly. He’s done precisely that. My question to you is how we
should feel about this? Is this incest? Is it psychotic? Should we
be indignant and seek to protect the kid? He is our Godson, but
he's also an adult. He's going on twenty-two years old. However,
we don’t want to see him hurt any more,” I said strongly.
“Well, is it incest? Absolutely. Ain't no doubt about 'tat. But,
only if sex occurs. It may be called incestuous feeling, but it
isn’t incest until they boogie down. Is it psychotic? Probably
not. Should you be indignant?” he asked and paused to laugh,
“You’ve had sex with his dad so you live in a glass house. That
would be a little like the pot calling the kettle black, and if I
know you like I think I do, because of empathy, you’ve allowed the
child to seduce you, rendering you incapable of a rational
judgment in this situation. I hate to be clever, but what the
Hell, you’re the shuttle cock and they’re the players,” he said.
“I don’t think I like the analogy, but I see your point,” I said
and laughed.
“Your next step is to lay it at the kid’s feet, but not with his
dad present. Don’t even tell him if you can avoid it, while his
dad is on your turf. Send his old man back to his domain with
hugs, kisses, and promises to consider helping him, but you need
more time. Whatever it takes, get him to his home. Meanwhile,
don’t alarm the kid but manage somehow to have him sleep over at a
friend's tonight. Get him out of the house. Dad is there to cause
a confrontation which won’t be wholesome for the boy in the long
run. The kid can’t be expected to make a rational decision with
his dad offering to hand him the love he never got from him for
twenty-two years. Give the kid any lame fucking excuse but get him
out of the house. Got that?” Master Waddie asked.
“Yes, sir, sounds like damn good advice to me,” I replied.
“You do that, then you’ll have breathing room and daddy won’t have
a reason for staying around if he can’t cause a confrontation. We
can talk again. I’m home all night tonight. I’ll be in the office
tomorrow. Call anytime and I’ll leave word with my receptionist to
put you through immediately. If you need me again tonight call at
any hour, and I’ll take your call. Good luck and do let me know
how you progress,” he said.
“I will, Master, and thanks,” I replied.
“No problem, good night,” he said.
I hung up the phone and turned to Blaine who just looked at me.
“He’s pretty damn sharp,” I said quietly. Blaine nodded his head.
“Master Waddie said we needed to get Little Beau out of the house
for the evening or for as long as his dad is here, and get Jake
back to his place before we talk to Little Beau about it.”
“Smart man. Good advice,” Blaine agreed, “Call Sarge, ask him to
come get him. They’re fifteen minutes away. They’ll keep him as
long as you need,” Blaine said.
“Good idea,” I said as I dialed Sarge’s number.
“Hey, Button, how you doing, Hon? This is Big Beau,” I said.
“I’m fine, Beau. How’s my Big Bro?” Button asked.
“I’m fine, Sweetheart. I need to speak to your number one master
for a moment if I may,” I said.
“Sure, Beau, he’s right here,” Button called Sarge to the phone.
“Hey, Buns, what’s up?” Sarge came on.
“Sarge, we need your help,” I said.
“Name it! You got it, Kid,” he replied.
“We need to get Little Beau out of the house for a while. Maybe
tonight and perhaps tomorrow. Could you come get him?” I asked.
“Be right there,” Sarge replied.
“Just let yourself in, go to his room, get him, and leave as
quietly as possible,” I said.
“Will do, Sweetheart, be there in ten,” Sarge replied.
“Thanks, Sarge, we owe you. We’ll talk later. I’ll give you a
call.”
“Sure, anytime,” Sarge replied. He hung up.
I went to Little Beau’s room and knocked gently. “Come in,” he
said.
“Hi, Darlin,’ I want you to do something for me.”
“Anything, Master, you know that,” he replied.
“Peeps, I ain't no master. You must reserve that title for Sarge,
Chief, and the Dungeon Master. I know what we shared was me being
strong and demanding of you, but it was what you needed at that
moment, and I provided it for you because I love you. I'll always
be there if you need it again, but I'm just a slave at heart. It's
what any good slave would do for someone in distress no matter if
he was another like himself. Just call me Beau or Brother,
Sweetheart.”
“Okay, Beau, I was only trying to show my respect for you,” he
said a little embarrassed.
“I know you were. I know you respect me. I appreciate it, but it
ain’t proper right now. Sarge is coming by in a few minutes to get
you. I want you to stay over to his place tonight. I want you to
just go quietly with him and not bother to come in to tell us
goodbye, understand?" I asked.
“Yes, I think so. What’s this all about, Beau?” he asked.
“Will you trust me until tomorrow to answer your question?” I
asked in reply.
“I’d trust you forever, Beau. Sure, I’ll go with Sarge. Love to, I
may even get to ride that big piece of mad-man military meat again
tonight,” he said with a wicked grin.
“I’ll say a prayer for you, Dearheart,” I assured him. We both
laughed. “Now don’t come out of your room until Sarge gets here,”
I gently ordered.
“I promise, Beau,” he replied.
I hugged him. “I love you, and I’ll call you tomorrow morning.”
“I love you, too, Beau.”
I helped Blaine finish getting dinner on the table. We never used
the big dinning room unless we’re entertaining the family for the
holidays. We have a table set up in an ante-room off the kitchen
that used to be a large walk in pantry. Blaine and I completely
redid it to make it into a cozy, kitchen dining area. Plenty of
room for everything including a couple of linen storage cabinets.
Sarge quietly came by and whisked Little Beau away before I went
to Jake’s room and quietly knocked. He came to the door. “Come,
Dad, we got dinner on the table,” I said. He followed me down. The
Dungeon Master was already seated and stood for Jake. Chief joined
us and our next door neighbor, an older, straight man who we
befriended and came to know and love us was invited. Blaine sat
down and I motioned for Dad Jake to sit next to me.
“Isn’t Little Beau eating?” he asked.
“He went to the movies with a friend and is going to stay over at
his house tonight. We fed him and his friend before they left. I
reminded him you were here, but he didn’t think you’d care whether
he stayed or not. I didn’t say anything, Dad, ‘cause I don't have
a clear picture yet about the details. We’ll talk after dinner,” I
said. Jake seemed satisfied with my explanation, but he was
visibly shaken Little Beau didn’t want to hang around for him.
What did he expect? Just because you’re the kid’s parent? Little
Beau was, after all, a legal adult. He was twenty-two now. He
could drink now and die for his country. Well, he could have done
that at eighteen, he just couldn’t have voted as to whether he
wanted to go to war or not.
We had a pleasant dinner. Bob our neighbor, a retired railroad
worker for Amtrak, engaged Jake in conversation. They held some
things in common coming from the same straight mentality. “Well,
sir, it was a bit of culture shock living next door to what I
thought was gonna’ be the Hell’s Angels,” Bob related to Jake
laughing, “Then less and more so when I found out they’s Hell’s
Belles instead,” he said. We all laughed at his crude take on our
life style. “Then over the years they’s done a lot of nice things
for me. A Hell of a lot. Why, two of their buddies cured me of a
crippling arthritis the doctors gave up on. Be what they may,
masters/slaves, whatever they want’s to be, they's damn good
people.
"Good to me anyways, and I’m right proud to have ‘em as neighbors.
Took me a while to get used to coming by and several of ‘em
walking around in the buff. Hell, now when they invite me to their
pool, I think nothing of joining ‘em. They don’t bother me none.
They respect me, and I respect them. You say your son is living
here with ‘em? That sweet young boy they call ‘Peeps’? If he’s
your son you have one Hell of a kid there Mister Jake. He goes out
of his way to be good to me and does little chores ‘round my
place. Won’t take a nickle for his help. I tried to give him
something for his thoughtfulness, but he won't take it. He's well
mannered, bright, and intelligent,” old Bob raved on about our
Godson. Jake just played with his food and muttered thanks to Bob.
I knew there was a reason we’d been good to that old man all these
years. Bob was like part of our extended family. He even called
Big Jim, ‘Dungeon Master.’ He loved Chief. Told everybody he had a
real, honest to God, Indian Chief living next door to him. We grew
to be able to gently kid with him and shared a lot of fun and
laugher together. Every now and then he’d bring a ‘sweetie’ by he
was dating, but if she got upset he’d dump her. He finally found
an outrageous woman who traveled the world who was not the least
put off by our lifestyle. Her name was Blanche. She was a terror.
A fun terror. Everybody loved Blanche. She insisted Bob get a bike
and join the family. They eventually did and were married at one
of our family gatherings in the buff. Everyone breathed a sigh of
relief when they finally decided to put their clothes on.
After dinner it took a while for Blaine and me to clean up. Chief
and the Dungeon Master helped. I wanted them there for support
when I talked with Jake. I already had in mind what I was going to
say. Thank God I called Master Wolf. The man was good. He helped
defused what might have become a bad situation. We got the idea
Jake came to San Diego to pick up Little Beau, demand he give up
school and return to Los Angeles with him. Knowing Little Beau the
way I do, he just might have done it. He loved his dad that much.
He would have considered anything to gain his dad’s love. If I was
in the kid's shoes, I don't think I could say no to that old wop
of a sex machine. Jake was one of a few men in my life who grew
sexier with age. There were more than a few times after I cut him
off my gut craved to feel his big cock rooting around in my ass
like a hog in a truffle patch.
Fortunately, Little Beau attached himself to two very powerful
male figures in our family, Sarge and the Dungeon Master. He was
always in Big Jim’s lap with his head on his chest while Big Jim
read or talked to us. He’d have his arms around Little Beau
holding him. The kid soaked it up. I know how he felt. I got my
fair share of the giant’s love with my head on his huge chest.
He’s my rock to this day. Don’t care how bad things got, ten
minutes in that man’s arms and the world looks a lot brighter.
Little Beau was the same with Sarge. Titus and Button were giving
enough to let Little Beau have some of their beloved Sarge’s time
and love. Besides, they had each other, too. By this time,
Titus pretty much took over being Button’s exclusive master. He
reported to Titus first and Sarge second, with Sarge’s approval of
course. I knew in my heart Little Beau was going to end up a good
master’s slave. He wanted that more than anything.
A good, strong, firm, but loving master would be the perfect
replacement for a father who was cold and rejecting. Peeps was
wise enough to not kid himself about belonging to Sarge. Sarge
became a ‘safe’ harbor for Little Beau. He knew he could give and
receive all the love he needed from Sarge and he didn’t have to
worry about the complications of a real master/slave relationship.
Don’t misunderstand, he accepted Sarge as his master and knew
because Sarge was his first master he would always think of him
that way. A part of him would always belong to Sarge and a part of
Sarge would aways belong to Peeps.
Little Beau showed Sarge the respect he was due and paid homage to
Sarge’s boots like any good slave should. He knew in his heart, as
we all did, when it came time for Little Beau to go to his own
master, Sarge would send him with the greatest love in his heart;
however, you could count on Sarge to check out the intended master
to the max. As much as I ragged on old Sarge, and he and I went
round and round, he was the perfect first master for Little Beau.
I will always be grateful to Sarge for that bit of kindness.
What the Hell, that dirty old man was getting a young hot piece of
ass regularly. All he had to do was lower his pants, snap his
fingers for Little Beau, and the kid was on his cock.
Nevertheless, we were grateful for the chemistry between the two.
Sarge treated him like a son and Little Beau needed that. When he
did well in school, Sarge was the first he’d run to for approval.
No one in the family made a bigger fuss over Little Beau’s
accomplishments or sang his praises more than Sarge.
* * * * * * *
We moved from the kitchen into the living room. Bob excused
himself, thanked us for dinner and left. We were alone with Jake.
“I talked with Master Wolf on the phone before dinner, Dad, and he
helped clear a couple of things in my mind. What I think we’d like
to know is do you want to interrupt Little Beau’s schooling?” I
asked.
“If necessary, yes,” he said without hesitation. There was a
stunned silence, and I felt everyone in the room physically pull
back from him.
I tried not to, but in a quiet, resolute voice I said, “I won’t
let that happen, Dad,” his face fell like a house of cards. Jake
knew I held the trump card.
“I won’t let it happen, either,” added my master firmly.
Chief raised his hand. “Me either, Jake, that kid’s been hurt
enough,” Chief said as fact.
“If I have any say in it at all, it won’t happen, Jake,” Blaine
said with conviction.
“He’s my son. He belongs at home with his dad not with you...”
“Perverts, Dad?" I asked. He hung his head knowing I won that
round.
“And I suppose what you have in mind is not just a tad on the
questionable side? You want what you and I had, only now, you want
it with Little Beau, your own son. Just because he’s your son
doesn’t white wash the stigma of perversion,” I said.
“That’s not what I meant and you know it,” he said.
“No, you’re wrong. I don’t know you anymore. I did once and would
have sworn by your love; however, I ain't sure who you are today.
I’m calling in all the debts you owe me right now, Dad, right this
very minute, for the sake of your son. You know I don’t want
money, but I do demand control in this situation. You gave up
control when you started pulling away from Little Beau when he
began junior high school. Every man in this room watched it
happen,” I said.
“Amen to that,” said the Dungeon Master.
“Who was it who emotionally supported that poor kid all those
years? Who was it taught him to play ball? It wasn’t you, Jake. It
was his fairy Godfathers. Who was it took him to baseball practice
and football practice. We were there, at every fucking game to
cheer him on? It wasn’t his dad. Fuck, Jake, we had to rope and
hog tie you to get you to his Goddamn graduation. I should have
just turned my back and let Chief scalp you. I was so disappointed
and pissed at you, I would have held you down while he done the
deed,” I said with considerable anger.
“Amen to that, too, Jake,” Chief agreed who just about heard
enough.
“I came to ask your help not to get lectured to. I thought you’d
understand. You guys of all people,” he accused.
“You’re wrong again, Jake. Your problem is, we understand all too
well, and you’re asking us to consider your selfish needs, not
Little Beau’s. That’s exactly what you’ve done to him for years.
You ain’t shown that kid any love at all because of your misplaced
grief and sexual confusion. Now, you sit there and tell me that’s
not selfish? Now he’s becoming an adult, you want to demand he
come home to become your little slave, but what kind of a master
do you think you’d make, Jake? You haven’t done a damn thing to
deserve him. You didn’t want him to go to college because, you
wanted to keep him under your thumb just like a little slave boy.
He was your brightest child. Your crowning achievement as a
father, for Christ sake. I would give both nuts and dick to have
sired a kid like him,” I said.
“Every man, with or without a cock, in this room is in agreement
with that, Jake,” the Dungeon Master said, “Hell, every one of us
has become more of a father to Peeps than you ever were. I ain’t
said very much, but I’m backing my slave a hundred and ten
percent, Jake. I won’t let you do it either without some honest
soul searching on your part. Besides that, Little Beau is an adult
now, and I won’t let it happen unless I hear it from his mouth he
wants it,” Big Jim said to Jake in a voice that nailed his butt to
the door. Surprised the Hell out of me, but that was my giant.
“Don’t look at me or Blaine, Jake, you know we feel the same damn
way,” Chief added sternly.
“Look, Dad, I’ll give you this, I won’t say no, I won’t help you.
There will be stipulations. I want to discuss it with Little Beau
away from you. I’m going to see he stays away until after you
return to L.A. He’s twenty-two now! We keep telling you that fact
but it just don't seem to sink in to your reality!” I exclaimed.
Jake looked shocked. He didn’t even remember how old his own son
was.
“You don’t have legal control over him anymore. You also don’t
have emotional control over him anymore. We do. Call us any name
you want, but thank God, he has seen fit to give us that option
right now. One stipulation will be he finishes college living here
with us. Second, it will be his decision as to how much he wants
to see you depending on the outcome of our presenting this news to
him. If he’s totally turned off by the idea, I ain't gonna’ lie to
you, I’ll see to it he’s protected,” I said.
“We all will, Jake," added Blaine.
Jake hung his head and started to cry. Not one man moved to
console him including me. He needed to feel our solidarity. To
console him would have shown a weakness in the ranks. “Look, Dad,
you know me well enough to know I won’t try to influence his
choice. I’ll present the facts and options and that’s it. You
better do some praying, and a good deal of major soul searching
might be advised. We’ll talk tomorrow before you go back. It won’t
look so bad in the morning, I promise,” I said. Jake got himself
together and nodded his head.
I walked him back to his room. It was late and I retired to the
Bear’s Lair with my master. He held me and kissed me. “I was
s'damned proud of you, Beaver, I just wish Earl, Jeb, and Beryl
could have been here to hear what you told him,” he said.
“What makes you think they weren’t?” I asked smiling. “You think
either of them old men or Master Earl would’ve missed something
that good with their baby slave holding court?” I asked with a
grin.
We both laughed and then the Dungeon Master, my love, again
surprised the Hell out of me. “Go to him, Beau. Give yourself to
him,” he said.
I looked at him stunned. “Please, Master, don’t feel like you have
to...” I started.
“That ain't a request, Slave, it’s an order. You will obey your
master. You must trust the man what own's your ass, Slave,” he
demanded and kissed me gently, “And, no holding back from him,
either, you understand, Slave?" he asked. "You give him the best
you have to offer,” my master said firmly. I knew better than to
question him further.
“I will obey, Master, and thank you, sir, for this lesson,” I
kissed him again and added, “You’re a much bigger and better man
than I am, Master,” I said softly.
“You know that ain’t true, you little shit, now go,” he commanded,
turned me around, and patted me on the butt. “Don’t stay the
night. You sleep in your master’s arms, not his. Just pleasure
him, see to his comfort, give him your love, and return to your
master. I’ll be waiting. You may even get a second load up there
tonight,” he growled. God, I loved that man.
I went to Dad Jake’s room and knocked gently. Jake came to he door
in his underwear. “May I come in, Dad?”
“Sure, Son, come on in,” he opened the door for me.
“My master sent me to you for your pleasure and comfort, sir. I
have been ordered to offer myself to you to use in anyway you see
fit. Furthermore, I am in agreement with my master’s order and
wish to please you, sir. Perhaps, if I hadn’t withdrawn from you
eight years ago we wouldn’t be in this position. I still love you,
Dad. You loved me all those years ago and know you still do. I
can’t turn love on and off any more than you can. Give me your
love, Dad, and I’ll give you mine in return,” I offered.
Jake grabbed me and held me tight. I held him equally as tight. He
sobbed in my arms and thanked me and my master for allowing me to
come to him. I forgot how good Dad Jake felt in my arms. I
recalled the love we had for each other all those years and the
wonderful outrageous sex we shared time after time. I started
getting hard. He laughed. “Your old man can still do it to you,
huh, Kid?” he asked.
“You know it, you old frump. I love you so much, Jake. There has
to be a happy ending to this. We just have to find it together,” I
replied.
“Let’s worry about that later, Slave, you don’t know how bad I
need your ass. I may come on entry,” he groaned. I slathered him
up real good with my spit. He mounted me from the top with my legs
on his broad shoulders and slammed that huge Italian cock as deep
as he could into my gut. He heaved twice, sucked in air, and I
could feel him filling me with his gizz. It happened just the way
he thought it might.
“That was just a warm up, Dad. Relax inside me for a minute, and
we’ll do some good-old down home fucking like you like to do. You
need to ride your slave-boy for a while,” I said.
He couldn’t get enough. I didn’t think he was ever going to stop
fucking me. Finally he started climbing the hill, and I knew he
was going get it. I asked his permission to come and he said ‘no,’
save it for my master. I didn’t come but he emptied a second big
load up my butt. Jake still had it. 'It'? That undefinable sexual
stimulant to my psyche. I could have come in a second, but I
learned over the years not to if ordered by the master fucking me.
It was a matter of control and my need to become a good slave.
Master Jeb was right all along. I was harder on myself than any
master’s punishment could have been. I saw it as my master’s right
to control my coming.
Master Earl rarely let me come in all those years, but when he
did, oh my God, it was like Christmas, New Years, Thanksgiving, my
birthday, the forth of July, Valentine’s Day, Bastille Day, and
Ground Hogs Day all rolled into one. He promised he would have me
learn to control my ejaculations and he did. It got easier as time
went on. I still could come at a moments notice. Before he
was killed he was working on having me come by snapping his
fingers and ordering me to. He made me perform several times for
select family members to show off his slave. I was able to obey
almost every time. Our family members were impressed.
He’d have me stand at parade rest, take hold of my nose chain,
pull it tight, snap his fingers and order me to come. He would
pull harder on my nose ring, but I knew not to follow. He wanted
me to feel the pressure. Sometimes he would reach behind me and
press hard on my plug as I pushed back. Pretty soon I couldn’t
hold it any more and would shout, “By your command, Master!” I
would shout and shoot four or five feet into the air. Now my giant
is following that same training and limits my coming. So I wasn’t
real sure I’d get to come that evening. As it turned out I
didn’t. He thought I needed to learn a lesson from the
evening and coming would be a reward. My master's use of his slave
was enough reward for me.
The next morning, Jake was a different man. Everyone, including
me, was shocked by his abrupt change of spirit. He was radiant. He
talked little about the night’s conversation, but when he did it
was with humility and acceptance. He knew Little Beau was in the
best of hands and we would do what was right for him. We assured
him we would as we waved goodbye to him.
“Well, Beaver...” the Dungeon Master said about to go on with his
sentence, but I cut him off.
“Please, Master, don’t say it, I’ll say it for you...my Master
knows best. Damn. I’m so sorry, Master, I even questioned you. I
feel bad.”
“No problem, you’ll be punished later,” he grinned wickedly.
“You promise?” I asked seriously.
“Of course,” he replied. He couldn’t contain himself any longer
and we both broke up in each other’s arms; glad a crisis was
averted.
“You know what this means don’t you, Slave?” the Dungeon Master
asked.
“I have an idea, but I’d rather hear it from my master,” I
replied.
“You’re gonna’ have to start making bi-monthly trips to Los
Angeles to pleasure him to protect our Godson. Whatever it takes,
with my blessing, none of us want to see that kid hurt more than
he already has been. Maybe Jake’ll find someone else while you’re
keeping his beast at bay,” he said. My master grew into a
wise and considerate man, and excellent Dungeon Master and a
superb master. I was only too proud to serve him. Fuck. Did he
punish me good. Woah. My ass ached for three days. I couldn’t stop
smiling.
Sarge kept Little Beau that night as well and returned him the
next morning. Sarge and Peeps were like two young lovers,
whispering and giggling with each other. It was good to see. It
was sickening. That wretched old pervert. Sarge was one of a kind.
Still wish there were fifty more in the world just like him. When
he passed away we thought we were going have to get a casket for
Little Beau as well. It was like it was his real dad lying there.
In some ways, it was. That young man went through the seventh ring
of Hell after Sarge died. Since I’d been through the fire, run
from the rain, and saw the light, I knew what to do. I got him up
and out before he had a chance to wallow in a quagmire of
self-pity, doubt, and depression. I taught him how to grieve. We
worked at it. Yes, it’s work. Why do you think they call it grief
'work.' He didn’t grieve alone, I grieved with him. We all did.
Sarge left a hole in our family we couldn’t find a plug large
enough to fill. It was so like Sarge. We irreverently compared the
large hole in our hearts to another hole what no man ever seemed
to be able to completely fill, his.
* * * * * * *
After Sarge brought Little Beau back, we set down and talked with
him. We asked Sarge to join us because we knew we were going to
need him. He and Little Beau bonded pretty tight over the last two
years and Little Beau acknowledged Sarge as his master. I
carefully explained to them my phone call to Master Wolf, his
recommendations, and why we had to get Little Beau out of the
house. Sarge immediately took our view and said it was the best
thing we could have done under the circumstances. I gave all
credit to Master Wolf. “Wise man,” said Sarge. We all agreed.
Little Beau was stunned. He sat quietly with Sarge’s big arm
around him. He didn’t know what to say or think.
“If you want to stay with Sarge a while longer we have no problem
with it, Son,” I told him. “Maybe, it’s better you talk it out
with him first.”
“No, Beau, Sarge knows I love and respect him, but I also know,
without asking, he’d want me to talk this out with my Godfathers
and then with my master. Am I right, Master?” he looked at Sarge
for approval.
“You know you’re right, my Sweet Baby-slave, you didn’t even have
to ask. You need to talk to your immediate family first and then
your old master’s arms will be waiting for you to listen,” Sarge
said. Little Beau started crying and told Sarge he loved him,
hugged, and kissed him. That’s just what the kid needed was
support from those who loved him most. We did, and for all my
ragging about Sarge, I knew in my heart he loved Little Beau
without measure.
Days went by and Little Beau wouldn’t talk to me. The summer was
coming to an end, and I suggested we get away together for a
weekend. We planned a ride out to the desert to Master Zack’s and
Will’s. He thought that sounded good. He was in good spirits and
didn’t seem preoccupied with the news. His other Godfathers
accompanied us of course. We took my bike, and he rode buddy with
me. He loved the big bikes like I did when I rode behind my master
and my giant. He loved wearing his leathers we bought him, and he
loved to see me in mine. He thought I was the epitome of a biker
dude (as he called me) with my tattoos and body jewelry. He asked
me to ride by the side of the Dungeon Master and just a bit behind
so he could look at his big boots as he rode his bike. Like
Godfather, like Godson. Peeps was going to be as big a boot slave
as I was. We’d laugh and giggle when we saw some man with a really
hot pair of boots and whispered to each other what we’d do to him
if we could.
Master Zack, Will, and Josh were glad to have us visit and we had
a wonderful weekend. Peeps slept between the Dungeon Master and me
but he still wouldn’t open up to us. I discussed it with Master
Zack and Josh while Little Beau and Will were playing in the pool.
Josh asked if he could try something. I said sure. I watched Josh
pull rabbits out of hats what shouldn’t have rabbits in them to
begin with.
Later we were in the big spa together after a wonderful dinner
Will and his kitchen helpers cooked. Josh motioned for Little Beau
to sit in his lap. Little Beau moved slowly and made himself
comfortable just in front of Josh. Master Josh enfolded him with
his big arms. Peeps admired and respected Josh greatly. He set in
Josh’s lap and the five of us continued our conversation about
nothing in particular. Time passed, and I looked over at Little
Beau and saw big tears rolling down his cheeks like salt water
boulders. He wasn’t actually crying, they were just coming from
somewhere deep within. Then I knew, Josh was healing something or
at least breaking the log-jam for the flow to start.
Josh wouldn’t let him go even though he asked to be excused. “No,
Little One, you need to sit right here for a while longer. That’s
a loving order from this master, Son. I'll let you go when you're
full,” he said quietly. He held him tight for about another half
an hour. Then the dam broke big-time. Josh let him go and Little
Beau headed straight for my arms. It all came pouring out; years
of pain, rejection, frustration, anger, hurt, disappointment, and
everything else one could think of. I held him while he cried his
heart out. Zack, Will, Big Jim, Chief, Blaine, and Josh gathered
close to put their hands on him for support and comfort. It
helped. Little Beau kept saying over and over, “How could he? How
could he?” he asked.
“There, there, Baby Beau, the worst part’s over. Healing can
begin, thanks to Master Josh. There, there, shhuu...it’s gonna’ be
fine. Your Godfathers ain’t gonna’ let nothing happen what ain’t
comfortable for you. Master Zack, can Little Beau and I go sit on
your rock and watch the Sun go down? I think we need to be alone
for a while.”
“Sure, you know where it is. Nice place to be alone. See you guys
later,” he said.
I pulled on my leather pants, boots, and vest. I made him pull his
on too, because I knew the minute the Sun went down it would start
getting chilly. I led him by his hand up the carved out steps, up
the side of the huge boulder to the natural ledge, and set him on
the bench Zack and Button built many summers ago. I leaned him up
against me and put my arms around him to hold him.
“You have to talk with me, Peeps. You must tell me what you’re
thinking. You have to get it out,” I said.
“I’ve been so afraid to tell you how I feel, Beau,” he lamented.
“Why, Sweetheart? There’s nothing you could tell me what’s gonna’
make me love you any less,” I assured him.
“I should listen to my master. Sarge told me the same thing. You
sure?” he asked cautiously.
“You have my word,” I replied.
“I want him, Beau. I want my dad for my master. I’ve always wanted
him as long as I can remember. When I reached puberty, the very
first time I jacked-off I fantasized about him fucking me or me
sucking him off, night after night. My bedroom closet’s back wall
is the wall to our bathroom at home. I drilled a tiny hole through
the wall so I could look through at him naked. I used to sit there
playing with myself, watching him jack-off on the toilet, and get
mine the same time he did. I used to dream of taking his come and
swallowing it. One time he came in a rag and threw it in the dirty
clothes hamper. When no one was looking, I took it to my room, and
sucked his come out of it. It tasted wonderful, Beau.
"I don’t care how he wants to love me Beau, if that’s the only way
I can have my dad’s love, so be it. I need him Beau. I never had
his love. Can you imagine me being his slave and taking care of
all his needs. Having sex with my dad is the greatest thing I
could think of happening to me. I never thought in a million years
it might happen. Then this last week, I began to think it just
might. I have to see him on my own though. I have to be with him.
I have to see if what he’s telling you is true. I don’t fully
believe it, yet. Until he takes me in his arms and kisses me, I
won’t believe it. I didn’t want to say anything before now because
I thought you might get upset and think I’m really sick.”
“Beau?” I asked him, “How could I be upset with you when I’m as
guilty in my feelings for you as your dad? I’m your Godfather for
Christ sake, and I’ve been making love to you. How much different
can it be? Besides, don't you think I know the attraction Jake
has. Your old man is one fuck'n hot son of a bitch. Ain't no two
ways about it, Son. My master sent me to him the night he came to
visit to pleasure him, and he fucked the holy snot out of me,
twice!” I exclaimed and rolled my eyes. Little Beau giggled.
“Was he good, Beau?” Peeps asked.
“Dear-heart...your old man still has it. It was our first time
together in over eight years. That old hardheaded wop can still
send this old slave into outer space without a booster rocket,” I
declared. We laughed together. "But the old sum' bitch wouldn't
let me shoot my load and then to teach me a lesson, neither would
my master when he fucked me later," I moaned. I had Peeps in
hysterics.
“Yeah, Sarge is training me to only come when he gives me
permission. He punishes me with his whip when I have an accident
and shoot without my master's permission. I never told him I got
the control part down pretty good, I come just so's I can have
both," he giggled and I agreed with him, "I'm like you, Beau, I
need control. Then you understand why I might want him?” Peeps
asked.
“Oh, God, yes! I’d be lying if I said no, but is that what you
really want, Peeps?" I asked. "There's lots of other good masters
out there you could find who wouldn't have the hang-ups Jake might
have," I said.
“What harm could it do to try my old man? I never got much
affection from him and to pleasure him might be just what the both
of us need. I can’t help love him, Beau, he’s my dad for gosh
sakes, but to put your mind at rest, I won’t become his slave
without his full measure of love. If I see it’s going to be the
same old thing, I’ll never fully commit to him. I’m an adult now.
My Godfathers have taught me I have choices,” he replied.
“Yes, you do have a choice. You're absolutely right, but I’m not
going to let the two of you jump into this. You have two other
Godfathers to convince as well, and I promise you, they won’t be
as easy or understanding as I am. You and I are looking at Jake
from a slave's point of view. Your other Godfathers will look at
it as masters and their need to protect you. We can't fault them
for that. They're just doing what masters do. If you ask Sarge, I
think he will agree. You have other people to think about. What
about Sarge? You just gonna’ dump him because your dad snaps his
fingers and wants you for his slave boy? I don’t think so. First
of all, I think you love that dirty old man too much to do that to
him; secondly, I won’t let you do it to a man I cherish, who has
been more than good to you. Sarge loves you very much. Then what
about school? With three strong willed masters and one brother
slave to back me, I won’t allow you go with your dad until after
you graduate from Vet school. That may be four or five more years.
I’ll allow Jake to visit, date you, stay the night or a weekend,
but no permanent living arrangements. After that, if the two of
you still want to be master and slave then Jake pays for you to go
through three months training like all the other slaves.
"Hey, who am I kidding, here? You’re over twenty-one years old. I
can’t really tell you what to do, but if you’re living with us, I
expect you to listen to your Godfathers and abide by our wishes.
Your Godfathers love you too much to hang school over your head
and say, 'Well, you have to do this or no school.' We’d never do
that. Even if you go against our wishes, we’ll still see you
through school. We love you, and that’s why we’re concerned.
Furthermore, I want him to come down to San Diego to live with
you. If he wants you bad enough he’ll do it. Start out together on
a new turf. Don’t go back into his world. That old house has
nothing but bad memories and ghosts in it. Insist he begin to
think of you as his slave and not as his son. Stop referring to
him as dad and call him Master Jake. You both must start to set
aside the fact he’s your parent. He must realize you’re an adult
and doing this because it’s your choice and not his due as your
dad. Do you understand what I’m saying?” I asked.
“I understand completely, Beau. You’re trying to look out for me
and my happiness, and I love you for it. All you guys. You guys
watch over me like mother hens, and I want you to know, I
appreciate it. I always have. Other than my brothers and sisters
my Godfathers are the only source of real love I had in my life.
That’s why I didn’t want to disappoint you by telling you this;
how I really feel about my dad wanting him to make love to me. I
would lie in his arms in a minute. Do you realize he's never held
me in his arms in my life, Beau; never even put his arms around
me. Do you know what that would mean to me to have him do that?”
he asked.
“I think I can, Little One,” I said quietly. Peeps started crying.
“He’s never told me he loved me, Beau,” Peeps said sadly. Then the
flood gates opened again.
God, what parents won’t do to their children. Look what mine did
to me. They made a family slave out of me at an early age and then
just came to expect it of me as time went on. There is no such
thing and do-overs. Who among us suffered miserable childhoods and
wouldn't love to go back and restructure those years as we felt
they should have been. We can't. It’s as simple as that. We have
to make the best of what was thrown on our plate. Some folks spend
their lives not living but trying to get over their childhood.
Some never do. How is it, in comparison to the number of years we
spend on this planet less than twenty of those years can have so
much influence on us?
Little Bill, Bull and Charlie's boy, had a great childhood
compared to Peeps or me. Give me Bull and Charlie as parents any
fucking day of the week compared to what Jake did to Little Beau.
He really doesn’t deserve the kid, but Peeps is head over heals in
love with his own dad. What can any of us say to him: no, this
ain’t right? Little Beau is an adult. He can damn well do what he
pleases. The most I can do is try to impose restrictions to soften
the worlds colliding. If Jake goes along with our concerns and
plans for Little Beau without being ‘Bull of the Woods’ demanding,
then let them do it. Incest? Maybe, but it’s not very likely
they’re going to give birth to an idiot child.
We sat on the bench and watched the Sun go down and the stars come
out as I held him in my arms. I felt his anticipation. He finally
just gave up on his dad and decided, as so many gay men do, to
find a substitute. Now, he had the doors to a new world opened to
him and he was eager to cross the threshold. In a sense, having a
master is the same as having a strong parental figure in your
life. Structured a little differently perhaps, but the roles and
results are pretty similar. Some need it more than others. Some
only fantasize they need it, but won’t give themselves over to the
reality. They just can’t get over their rebellious teenager
syndrome. If they only knew, it was the key to passing into a
mature, comfortable, giving, sharing, humanistic adulthood. We
talked some more and I pointed out to Little Beau he already
adequately replaced his dad with Sarge who went out of his way to
show him love and appreciation.
I knew I might as well be whistling ‘Dixie’ in a hurricane. He had
to try his dad. He was like a moth to a flame. I felt it. I knew
it. Who was I to hold him back from the candy dish? Hell, I had it
pulled away from me too many times in life to count, and it hurts
every time. I told him how satisfied his dad seemed after my
master sent me to him and how appreciative and docile he was the
next morning. I told him about my master's suggestion I go to Los
Angeles twice a month to run interference for him (Little Beau)
until he can sort out the mess or until he gets through school.
That’s what his family in San Diego was most concerned about. He
was doing so well in school. He’s happy with us and Sarge. Why
rock the boat. He has the rest of his life to explore that avenue
with his dad.
I did get an agreement out of him. He would tell his dad his
Godfathers were now his accepted parental figures. He was living
under their roof, being supported by them, and he felt obligated
to abide by their wishes. He agreed he would tell him the truth
about Sarge. That he found a man he felt comfortable calling
master who gave him a great deal of unconditional love and was
training him to be a good slave. He promised to tell his dad Sarge
was supportive and caring and he felt he had obligations to him.
Little Beau would make it quite clear he had no intention of
dumping Sarge. When we returned to San Diego there was a night
letter delivered Saturday evening. It was from Master Wolf:
Dear Beau's (Big & Little),
I've taken the liberty of dictating some thoughts to my secretary
in the form of letter concerning father/son homosexual dalliances.
(Fancy name for 'gettin' it on.') I’ve had several cases in my
experience, and they are not as rare as one might think. Sometime
they occur by accident. I had a man in his early forties come to
me all upset. He met a young kid of legal age and they fell very
much in love. They had been living and cohabiting ( i.e. fucking
like snakes) together for several years. Out of the blue he got a
letter from his ex-wife who left him shortly after his son was
born for no reason he could ascertain. He immediately filed for
divorce, and it was granted on grounds of desertion. She
disappeared with the boy, remarried, and he never saw or heard a
word from her about the child in all these years. He was stunned.
She traced him though a mutual friend of their families and sent
him a letter through the friend. She was asking his help because
the kid ran away from her world, and she hadn't heard anything
from or about him in three years. Could he help? She
enclosed a picture.
Well, guess who the picture was of? You guessed it. His little
slave. What are the chances? The fickle finger of fate? He came to
me because he loved the kid as a mature older man loving a younger
learning man. It was sort of a daddy/boy master/slave kinky
leather relationship. The kid was eighteen when they met and was
now almost twenty-two. While the father felt guilty he also didn't
want to give up the relationship. Should he be honest with his son
or should he destroy the letter and picture and just keep quiet
about it? How would you advise the father if you were his
therapist?
I told him absolutely share the letter and the picture with his
son. Do it in a wholesome manner. Preface showing him these things
with a talk about what he is about to discuss with him in no way
alters his feelings toward the boy. He still will be his lover,
master and/or big daddy (whatever), and it will probably be even
better because of the news. Tell the kid he’s not upset and still
loves him very much, probably more now than ever. Not to let this
destroy something wonderful they shared together for almost four
years.
He did exactly as I told him, and while the kid was visibly
shaken, he immediately accepted the fact his father had, indeed,
become his lover and master. He didn't choose to give that up
either. Since his wife had been such an asshole all those years to
keep them apart they decided the father would write her a nice
cordial letter telling her he checked all areas he knew to check
and he found nothing. The kid, for whatever reason, never wanted
to have anything to do with her again. They are still together
after eight years and very happy.
While incest occurs far more frequently than anyone would like to
admit there are more tolerable forms of it than others. For
example, father/son homosexual bondings are tolerated better than
father/daughter or brother/sister. Father/son relationships of
this nature occurs ten times more frequently among Brits than
American. Why? We don't know. Perhaps, they've got tighter bums?
Who knows? Also, I would suspect, (not founded in fact) that the
number of cases of father/son relationships are higher than any
one has ever suspected, but because of their clandestine nature
are rarely reported. Hope this information is helpful. Sincerely,
Master Wolf
Little Beau entered his Junior year at U.C.S.D. and was involved
with school, our household, and Sarge. I began bimonthly trips to
see Jake and we fucked like two alley cats in heat. He was always
so happy to see me and sad to see me go; however, he knew I’d be
back in another two weeks so he was satisfied for a while. I
talked with him about selling the big house and moving to a
smaller one in San Diego. He said he’d think about it.
Master Wolf suggested they begin to date if Jake was interested.
He was. He would drive down, stay with us, and date his son. We
didn’t care if they went out and got a motel room, but they
couldn’t do it at our place. That was Master Wolf’s suggestion as
well. Things went well until Sarge got sick and passed away the
summer Little Beau finished his junior year. Sarge made him
promise on his death bed he would finish school that next year,
and he did. Peeps grieved all that summer and well into the school
year. He didn’t want to see Jake for a while. I was still
traveling up to Los Angeles twice a month. I started going by
Amtrak and Jake would pick me up at the local station. I explained
why Peeps couldn’t see him for a while. He seemed to understand.
He remembered what I went through when my master was killed.
Little Beau went through vet school and slowly began to transfer
his love for Sarge to his dad. Jake bought a small place not far
from us and began to see more of Peeps. His attitude completely
changed. He paid for the last year of Little Beau’s college and
vet school. They began to have sex regularly even though Peeps
continued to live with us through vet school. That was one
graduation we didn’t have to drag Jake to. He was there with us
and about twenty-five surviving family members, yelling, and
screaming for their boy. Jake let loose the flood gates of love
for Little Beau and that was exactly what the kid needed. It was
what Jake needed, too.
Little Beau became a successful veterinarian in a small suburb of
San Diego. After going through three months of slave training with
the Dungeon Master and Chief, Jake made a claim for him, paid for
Little Beau’s slave training and rewarded the two trainers
handsomely. Jake has made a better master than any of us thought
he might. Peeps and his dad have been living happily together for
about five years now. Jake bought a big Harley and they come to
the limited family functions we have. They’re at our house for
dinner, weekends for pool, or we’re at their place several times a
month. Sometimes we go on a run somewhere together. We have a lot
of fun with Jake and Peeps. Little Beau seems to have found
his bliss and why not? His old man showers the kid with more love
than you can imagine; however, Peeps waits on him hand and foot.
He loves his master. He has become his total slave. His master
loves his little slave.
It’s worked out better than anyone expected. Wouldn’t you know,
that horny old goat, Jake, still wants to diddle me every now and
then. My Master orders me to do it so I can’t say ‘no.’ Besides,
he still can throw the meanest damn fuck into me any man ever has.
That’s where our family is today. The story of Little Beau Peep
may upset some. It was a little disconcerting to us at first, but
what the Hell, isn’t love by any definition still love? All of
life is living, loving, giving, accepting, and loss. Our family
has done its fair share of those things but we remain together.
Not as many as in the golden years but in some ways a more quality
group of men you can count on to be there when you need them. It's
been my good fortune to know and love them.
Little Beau Peep ~ Completed: 08/31/01
Copyright ~ © ~ 2001 ~ 2016 ~ Waddie Greywolf
All rights reserved
WC = 17, 511
12/12/2016