Saturday, May 10 2003

My relationship with Nikki is different from the relationship I had with Ella because it's not so sex oriented. It's like a very good friendship. Nikki doesn't care much about sex yet and what matters to her is different from what mattered to Ella for example. She enjoys cuddling and kissing and even sex but to her it's not really sex, it's more like a very close friendship. She's like all other kids. They appreciate very close friendships with older people and I think it matters to them more if their friends are of same sex but I might be wrong. So the things we do are part of our friendship and not just sex or fun as it would be with Ella. It's hard to explain it. I think children her age still need to feel protected and safe by their adult friends, sort of as if I were her mom and the other things we do are just part of that relationship. As she grows up she will learn more about her other feelings and she will learn to separate them from love for her mom or love for her girlfriend. I hope this makes sense. I'm not an expert in child psychology but I think I've learned a lot since I met Nikki. :)

It's Saturday morning here and Nikki is making pancakes in the kitchen. We just returned from her soccer practice. She's having a sleepover tonight with her girlfriends so I'll miss her for one night but I'll see her tomorrow again. I have to go now because she's making a mess in the kitchen! :)