Thursday, February 20 2003

I was very busy this week and only now have some time to write. In the last entry I said how I bought tickets for a concert for me and Nikki. The concert was held on Friday, a day before Nikki's birthday which was convenient because Nikki invited her friends to a party at her home like she does every year. They usually stay overnight for sleepover too. Friday was Valentine's Day so it was kind of nice to spend the day with her and go out to a concert. I told Ella in advance where I was going and she didn't say anything about it. She tried to ignore what I told her and I didn't want to irritate her so I didn't say much at all, only that I was taking Nikki out for her birthday and that I wouldn't be back home until late. She said she had to study for exams but when I came home on Friday night I found a note on the kitchen table where she wrote that she went out to meet some friends.

I called Nikki late on Friday morning and told her I'd come to her place and pick her up in couple of hours. When I arrived she was waiting for me in her best dress. She was beautiful. Her mom made her hair in finger locks which I have never seen her wear before. She also wore some lip gloss and ribbons in her hair. She looked much younger than 12! When we got down to the car I gave her a birthday present, the electronic organizer I promised her. It made her happy and she loved it. She unwrapped it in the car and played with it all the way to the city. I wanted to take her home first but I didn't know how Ella would react so I suggested we go the movies first, then have something to eat and then go to the concert.

Nikki wanted to see the new James Bond movie. It wasn't something I wanted to see but I let her decide on everything because it was her birthday. The movie was average but she liked it so I was happy for her. After the movie we went to her favorite pancake restaurant and we talked about the movie and her soccer practice along the way. That was when I decided to tell her about Ella and what I told her about us. I told her how Ella reacted and that everything would be fine. She was surprised about Ella's reaction because she likes her very much and the two of them were always playing together whenever I took Nikki home with me. She said she wanted to see Ella again and I promised her I'd talk with Ella about it. I was surprised how mature she was about the whole thing. I felt that she understood Ella's feelings just as they were, as if she had been there with us and knew what went on between us.

We were talking like this for a long time and almost forgot about time. When I looked at my watch it was already past the time when we had to leave for the concert so we rushed to the car and drove to the club where the Cranes were playing that night. It was very cold outside but when we entered the club it was warm and pleasant and we felt much better than outside and the hall was full of people. I think Nikki was the youngest person there. Some people were looking at her and smiling and she held my hand all the time as we tried to get closer to the stage. I didn't want to take us too close because people were pushing around us all the time but we were still close enough to see the band.

The band came out on time and everyone cheered. I liked their music and I think they were great but Nikki was less impressed although she liked some songs too. The concert was over in about two hours and we left the club happy and a little tired. But it was still too early to go back home so we drove around in the car. It was around 10pm when I parked just outside her home. I kept the engine running so we could stay warm inside and then we just talked because neither of us wanted to go upstairs to her home where her parents were waiting for us. We could have gone to her room but we were happier alone in my car. After a while we kissed and I held her in my arms and hugged her and wished her happy birthday again. She is 12 now and I've known her for four years. I've seen her grow and change and it's such wonderful feeling to be with her in love.

It was around 11pm when I walked her to her home. Her dad opened the door and we said goodbye. I kissed her cheek and then I left. When I came home I found Ella's message. I was hoping she wouldn't be mad at me for leaving her alone on Valentine's Day but she never said anything about it and she never asked me how was my day with Nikki or what we did together. The following day I told her how Nikki asked about her but she changed the topic and pretended she wasn't interested. I can't believe she's willing to ignore Nikki now when she used to play with her before and let her even sleep in our bed. It makes me mad sometimes but I'm not telling her about it.