Wed, July 31 2002

Nikki is helping her mom and dad packing up for their trip and doesn't have time to come here for a visit. I'll see her tomorrow before they leave though. Hopefully we'll have some time to ourselves in her bedroom so we can kiss for one last time. I think I've found a place where we could go when they return from Spain. It's not even too expensive. Actually there are a few different places I like and they're all in France. The one I like is down in the south of France near the coast. I booked it for 7 days. Some other places I really liked are similar but not very close to the coast.

Apparently there is a show called "Undressed" on American MTV which features some lesbians. I haven't seen it here because we have different shows on MTV here. Unfortunately there are not many lesbian shows on TV. I think they should make more mainstream shows for free to air TV with lesbians, maybe sitcoms or something like that. Even game shows would be fun, like Survivor for example. I'd like to see a lesbian version of Survivor where a group of girls are playing games on a desert island. That would be fun and I could watch it with Nikki every week. It would be even more fun if the girls are really young like 10 or 12 years old.

I thought maybe I should speak with Nikki more about our relationship but I don't know how to bring it up with her. I would probably be more open with her regarding sex if it wasn't for her parents who don't want us to be that close. I'm just respecting their wish. It makes me uneasy even when we're only intimate like when we slept together in her room and I held my hand between her legs. I don't dare to go any further with her than that even though both of us would love to be more sexual with each other. I think it's just a matter of waiting a little bit longer until Nikki becomes more independent. I hope it will happen before she starts her high school but I can wait for her as long as it takes. Age of consent here is 15 so it's still better than in America but we have to wait a few more years before we can really be open about it. Maybe I should just talk to her about it for now and not necessarily practice it. I must admit we haven't discussed it a lot, just on a few occasions when it came up while we watched some sexy movie. Maybe I'll try talking with her when we go on vacation. Then we'll have plenty of time just for ourselves and lots of privacy. To tell the truth I don't even know if she masturbates. We never talked about it before and I'm curious if she would want to talk about it at all. She's not shy and she has sex education at school but it just never came up between us yet.

I'm going to help Ella now make some dinner for us. She's a great cook and she knows how to make a good Asian dishes. I tried to do something like that by myself before I met her but I could never make it as good as she does it.

Tomorrow I'll see Nikki. I can't wait to hug her. I hope they'll have a good weather in Spain and lots of sunshine so Nikki can get a nice tan. I love when she has a tan, it makes her very sexy and then I just want to kiss her all over!