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Lovers, Fantasies, and Realities (MF Rom)

By Shon Richards

I was too old to be climbing trees. I was too young the last time I climbed this tree. I had often wondered what would the police have thought if I fell and they had to come out and to collect my broken body. My imagination used to speculate on which my parents would take the hardest- the fact that I was dead or the fact that I was sneaking into the bedroom of a black girl.

It had been four years since I had last tried this, but the bottom of the window screen was still loose. Kendra's parents might be wealthy but they're lax about home repair. I slipped my hand under the screen and tapped on the window a little too hard. Chalk my nervousness up to dangling out of a tree limb. Or, chalk it up to meeting my first love again. Either would be true.

Kendra's face appeared at her window and my heart just ached. She was prettier than Galadriel and lovelier then any nymph from Xanth. I loved what she had done with her hair. It was woven into tight braids that reminded me of African Princesses. Her cheeks were a little fuller and there were wrinkles for the first time around her dark eyes, but I didn't care.

I felt an amazing sense of loss at the realization that time had passed while we were separated.

"Aaron!" Kendra growled. "You're too old to be climbing trees!"

Kendra and I always thought alike. It's one of the reasons I sneaked into her bedroom every night for two years in High School. Well, that and the handjobs.

"Are you going to help me in or what?" I snapped back.

Kendra smiled, and I knew everything was going to be all right. Her teeth were so white in the moonlight and her smile was so genuine I knew it hadn't been a mistake to come back here. In fact, as Kendra helped me back in, I realized I had been a fool to ever leave.

"Crom's Blood," Kendra swore as we panted in her dark bedroom. I guess I had put on some weight too. We both began to laugh at the same time.

"Still swearing obscurely?" I asked quietly.

"Of course," Kendra replied just as quietly. "Are you still entering homes through the windows?"

"Only the homes of Princesses," I replied. I took a good look at her while we shared a warm silence. She was wearing a purple nightgown that was far racier than the white fuzzy gown she used to wear. It clung to her body and revealed a cleavage that Kendra would have killed an army of Orcs to own when we were teens. I was aware that she was no longer the girl I remembered. She was now a woman.

"You're looking good," Kendra whispered. "What a minute, you've got pecs! When did a skinny boy like you get muscles?"

I laughed. "I took up fencing in college. It felt silly to read all of those books and not know how to hold a sword."

"I wish my school had fencing," Kendra laughed as she sat on the floor. I sat on the floor across from her.

The bed creaked. We had long ago discovered that the slightest creak brought questions from her sleeping parents next door.

"You would have been great at it," I said. Kendra had an anger and a fire that most of my fencing companions could never match.

We looked at each other in comfortable silence. I don't know about her, but for me I understood why I had been so restless the past few years. Looking into her brown eyes, I knew that there was one less mystery in the world.

"Why are you here?" Kendra asked. "Not that I mind."

She reached out and took my hand, and I clutched her fingers tightly.

"I was back in town to visit my parents," I explained. "After telling me about cousin Greg marrying a Jewish girl and cousin Wesley marrying a doctor, she mentioned that you had come back to town."

Kendra snorted and her cheeks puffed. "I bet. More likely she told you that the nigger girl you used to like couldn't find a job and came back to live with her folks."

"Hey," I whispered sharply. "First of all, it's bad enough hearing that word from my mother. You don't have the venom to say it. Second, what's this 'used to like' nonsense?"

Kendra looked away. "You haven't written to me in years."

I squeezed her hand tighter. "You were dating Teddy," I almost accused. "You were happy, and I wasn't. I didn't want to send you letters about my sad life."

Kendra looked back at me, and I saw that anger grow. The same anger that appeared when I told her about my mom ripping down my poster of Janet Jackson or when her parents told her she would never get a husband if she kept reading "fantasy hippy crap". I couldn't help it, but I smiled as I saw the return of her familiar passion.

"Who ever said I was happy?" she hissed. "And why are you smiling?"

"Whoa, you weren't happy?" I said with maybe too much glee.

"Of course not!" Kendra snapped. "Teddy was an ass, and my parents loved him. Couldn't you tell by what I wrote you?"

"No," I said honestly. "All I noticed was that you were having wild sex with him in your dorm room and that you guys were planning to spend the summer together instead of meeting in Jacksonville like we had planned."

Kendra's eyes widened. "Oh, drok! Why didn't you remind me? You could have written back and told me."

I had to look away. "I thought you had made your choice. I didn't have the guts to write back and when you never didn't either, I thought that was the end of the story."

"Dumb-ass," Kendra said as she touched my face. I looked back at her and saw amusement in her eyes. "Since when did we ever read a story that wasn't part of some long series or trilogy?"

I laughed. Her hand on my cheek felt good. No, it felt right.

"That reminds me," I said, as reached into my back pocket. "I brought you a gift."

"I bet you did," Kendra teased.

Neither of us brought up our old arrangement. I'm not sure which of us was more embarrassed by it. One night I had brought her the latest Xanth book and that night, Kendra gave me the first handjob. The next day I brought another book, and she told me to wait 'till she had finished the first one. We didn't have sex that night, but later, when she was done with the first book and I again brought her the next one. Then she allowed me to slip my hand under her robe and bring her to orgasm. That became our arrangement, and we never discussed it.

"I didn't know if you had this one," I said as I handed it to her. It was an anthology of stories in tribute to Tolkien.

"No, I don't," she said as her voice broke. For a moment it looked like she was going to cry, but she started to laugh.

"What's so funny?" I asked. My heart was doing flip-flops. There was a sob or two in her laughter, and I didn't know if she was in anguish or delirious.

"Remember the stupid 'Incarnation' series?" she said when she wiped away some tears.

"Stupid?" I asked. "You devoured those books. You read one a day and would call me at my house to tell me you needed the next one that night."

Kendra leaned over and kissed me. In all our years, we had never kissed. I tasted salt from a tear but it was obliterated by the taste her tongue and her lips and the amazement of kissing Kendra.

"I never read them," she said after she broke the kiss.

"What? Yes you did! I remember how guilty you looked when you-"

Realization struck like a blast of fire from a dragon.

"When I was having you in my panties every night?" she asked.

"Kendra, I wish ..."

"I know," she said. "But hey, I was the rich black girl with a lawyer dad, and your mom was a secretary. I'm black, and you're white. I went to my dad's college for free, and you got scholarships at a college across state. Aragorn and Arwen didn't have it this rough."

I touched her lips and ran my thumb over her lip. "It was no excuse. Do you remember when we first met?"

"Of course," Kendra said. "I had checked out the second Narnia book, and you couldn't wait for it to be returned."

She kissed my thumb before continuing. "You were smart. You noticed that someone had checked out the first book just a week before, and you guessed that the same someone would have checked out the second book. You tracked me down and asked me if I was done with it yet. Do you remember what I did?"

"You reached into your bag and gave it me, right there," I said.

"And you asked me if I was done with it first," Kendra sighed. Her fingertips touched my ears and ran over my eyebrows. "You wouldn't take it unless I was done first. There you were, a skinny white blonde boy who read the same books I did but was nice enough to let me finish it first instead of demanding it like any other white boy would have done."

"Not all white kids would have been rude," I said.

"Which is why I lo-like you," Kendra said. "You believe that."

"Why bring all this up?" I asked. My fingers traced the lines of her cheeks. Never in all our late night games did we touch this much. At least not above the waist. Her own hands were sliding down to my shoulders, and I liked she way she squeezed my muscles. It felt like she approved.

"Because I knew on that day that you were something special," Kendra said. "But I also knew that my dad would kill you if I ever told him. It was hard enough talking to you at school or at the library with people staring at us. Deep down I knew we were going to get into a snakepit of trouble."

I chuckled. "Then why did you invite me to your room during the summer?"

Kendra took my hand and placed it on her breast. I gasped and then smiled as I lifted cupped her breast in my hand. The satin was no barrier at all to my fingers and I delighted in the feel of her hard nipple underneath.

"I guess I wanted to see if you would come," Kendra sighed.

"It was like rescuing a Princess," I told her. "Climbing that tree made me feel like a hero. I felt like I was defying the world when I snuck into your bedroom."

"We should have gone to the prom," Kendra laughed. Her hands squeezed my chest muscles.

"We should have worked together on our senior English project," I laughed. I cupped both her breasts with my hands.

Neither of us brought up defying our parents. Some acts of courage can't be attempted even in conversations. We sat in silence on her bedroom floor and touched each other. I didn't have the courage to try to get under her gown; it was too amazing just to be touching her. I loved the feel of her smooth skin, softer than any of my dreams.

"What did you major in?" I asked.

"English," Kendra said. "I screwed up. I didn't want to be a teacher, and I can't stand to write for a newspaper. That leaves me writing fiction, and I haven't sold enough stories to get out on my own. You?"

"English, and I got a job in New Hampshire with a newspaper. A friend of mine works there, and he got me the interview."

Kendra blushed, but then she just laughed with me.

"I leave tomorrow," I said.

Kendra pulled me to her again and kissed me. She kissed me hard and I could feel the anger in her kiss. Her tongue was vicious and her teeth were cruel. When we finally broke our kiss, the anger was still in her eyes.

"Why did you come here tonight?" she asked again.

"The North is different," I said. "They treat black people like people there. We can be a real couple."

She moved in to kiss me again, and I stopped her.

"Come with me," I told her. "We've never dated. We've never eaten a meal together. I'll sleep on the couch, but I just want to have a chance to be with you."

"Leave my parents?" Kendra asked. "After they sent me to college? My family would freak. And I know your mom would never accept me. What kind of a girl would my parents and yours call me?"

"You would be my girl," I said in a whisper.

A knock at the door startled us and delayed her response.

"Kendra? Your light is on. Having trouble sleeping, Pumpkin?"

It was her dad. My heart almost burst from my chest as I stared at the closed door. For a brief moment I considered answering him, enraging him and maybe even getting Kendra disowned. It would cut her ties and leave her free to run with me to the cold places where we would warm each other forever.

I held my tongue. Heroes don't do that to their Princesses.

"Just reading, Dad!" Kendra yelled back. "I'll be going to sleep soon."

"Okay, goodnight," he said and we heard his footsteps walk away to the bathroom. A few minutes we heard the flush and then the slow footsteps back to his bedroom.

"I better go," I said.

Kendra stood with me and hugged me too tightly. I hugged her back. A hug was another first for us and thinking back, I would have traded all the handjobs we shared if we could have hugged at will instead.

"Don't go just yet," Kendra whispered. "I haven't rewarded you for your gift."

"Kendra," I said as I ran my fingers around one of her braids. "You never had to reward me. I would have brought you books just the for the chance to talk to you for hours."

"I know," Kendra said. Her hands were unzipping me and I was stunned as she pulled my underwear down. Our handjobs always stayed within our underwear.

She knelt before me and kissed the tip of my erect cock. "I wasn't rewarding you for the books."

She took me into her mouth as I stood there. The contrast of our skins had never been as vivid as it was when I saw my pale cock disappear into her dark lips. It was like I had never realized just how different we were visually. Kendra had always just been a wonderful friend but for a brief moment I almost understood why people would disapprove of us. That thought was destroyed when her bright eyes looked at me with something I hoped was I love. Fuck everyone else.

Her tongue danced playfully on the underside of my manhood. I stroked her braided hair lovingly as Kendra began to suck me in earnest. Back and forth her mouth moved, and my knees shook as I slid into her throat. I felt her lips seal around me, but I could still hear the loud wet sounds of her sucking. For a moment I feared the return of her father to investigate what seemed to me to be a deafening display of oral affection.

"Wait!" I groaned. "Not like this."

She removed me from her mouth and laid my swollen member against her cheek.

"Oh? You used to never make requests before," she whispered.

The gleam in her eyes told me that I should have.

"Let me get on the floor," I whispered as I sat down. Kendra stripped off my shirt and pants.. I did the same with her nightgown, pulling it over her head to gaze on her nude body for the first time in our friendship. We spent a minute or two looking at each other, and I think she felt the same hesitation that I did over the differences in our skins. I marveled over the rich darkness of her hard nipples while she ran her fingers over my pale chest. My hands brushed the black fur of her sex while her eyes devoured the contrasting paleness of my thighs.

"Lie back," Kendra insisted, pushing me down. She turned around and crawled backwards over my body. Embraced by her ebony thighs, I watched as her body melted on top of mine and in a moment of clarity I realized that our colors not only complimented each other but defined us as well.

With her sex hovering over my face, I accepted her offering. As I pulled her to my lips, and she brought her mouth to my cock. I was engulfed by the chocolate pillars of her thighs and fed with the nectar of her delta. She consumed my pulsing sword as her braids fell around my thighs and waist.

We couldn't move much, which was perfect for our clandestine affair. Slight thrusts, a rolling of the hips and an occasional arching of our backs was all we could do merged as we were. All I could see was the curves of her ass and all I could taste was the tangy musk of her desire. I assume it was much the same for her, and I could only guess from the clenching of her thighs that it was just as blissful for her as it was for me.

We found a rhythm of movement. As our climaxes approached, her sex pressed harder against my mouth until my lips tingled. My own hips rose faster and faster to thrust into her mouth, and I shuddered every time I felt her chin strike my groin. Bound in silence, we fucked against each other's mouths. It was hard to express the passion we had within us while at the same time smothering any noise that may betray us.

Suddenly, her hips froze and I sucked hard on her emerged clitoris. Tremors rode through her thighs and a spasm racked her body on top of mine. I remembered with fondness how she used to climax around my fingers and my tongue delved deep into her sex. Wave after wave of clenches pulsated through her and onto my mouth.

Kendra felt me pause as my own orgasm approached. Instead of removing her lips, she sucked me down to my base. I groaned between her thighs as my cock erupted in her mouth. Silently, she swallowed me as I writhed underneath her.

"We should have done that years ago," Kendra said as she rolled off of me. I tried to sip up and failed. Laughing she pulled me up to a sitting position.

"I would have brought you my entire library the next day if you had," I said. The sex was over, but I couldn't help touching her. I wanted her breasts, her smooth belly, and dimpled cheeks all at once.

"Come with me," I said again.

"I'm no heroine," Kendra sighed. "You were the hero. You were the one who left your house, rode your bike to mine, climbed the tree and brought me books. You know how they handle underage sex here. The boy is always at fault and the girl is always patted on the head and pitied. You literally risked jail for me."

"I was no hero," I said. "I just loved you."

She looked away, and that was the end of that.

"Are you leaving tomorrow?" Kendra asked after a time.

"No, I've changed my mind. I'm too awake. I've got my car packed and ready. I'll leave tonight, and when I get tired I'll check into a motel."

We got dressed again. Kendra promised to write, and I promised to write back. I'm not sure if either of us meant it.

Climbing down was always harder than climbing up. For one thing it was dark, and I had to put my feet on branches that I couldn't see. I just had great sex and my knees were a little shaky.

I was also stalling. Kendra's temper was flaring, and I could hear her throwing things around her bedroom. At any moment I expected her to fling open her window and pass me her suitcase so we could ride off in the sunrise. As I circled around the tree in my downward spiral, I waited too long whenever I was on the side of the tree closest to her window. A climb that normally took me ten minutes was taking a half-hour.

There was a flurry of movement in her bedroom that kept my spirits hopeful but when I saw her light go out I realized that last minute changes of minds only happened in books.

I dropped down to the ground and froze as I heard a sound I had heard often in my nightmares-the sound of the front door opening. Sheer panic ripped through my mind and prevented from doing anything smart like running away or jumping into the bushes. In fact, I was so terrified I didn't realize who was at the door until she spoke.

"Help me with this suitcase," Kendra whispered. "I crammed every piece of clothing I owned into it, and it weighs more than the Dragon of the North!"

"Kendra?" I asked, still stunned. "What are you doing here?"

"What? I was supposed to come down the tree like in some bard's tale? If we're going to live together, Aaron, you have to learn to separate fact from fantasy!"