!ADULTS ONLY! Tag Bonewell: House Dick!

"I want you to fuck me, Tag. Right on my bed and right in front of that bastard Jake." She tossed a thumb at the closet. "That prick, lord knows, cheated on me enough times. I, believe it or not, never cheated on him. Not even once. And, believe me, Tag, I had plenty of offers." Tag didn't doubt that one bit. "So, Tag, fuck me, please. And let's have Jake watch. It'll be fun! I promise." She moved toward him, her breasts swaying seductively. Her arms outstretched.

"This is too crazy, Greta. And fucking downright ghoulish. And I don't . . ." She was near enough now for him to smell her light, delicate perfume. Close enough to sense her body heat. Her arms were headed toward his shoulders. He thought he smelled the delightful odor of pussy.

And, though he hated himself for it, her weird idea coupled with her absolutely beautiful body, had aroused him. She didn't miss that fact, either. She changed the course of her right hand, reached down and pressed it onto his bulge. And squeezed. Twice for emphasis. Her left hand was around his neck.

"Ghoulish, smoulish, Tag. Jake's dead, for Christ's sake. He ain't gonna object! And I know that bump in your pants ain't your gun. I saw you put that away. Didn't I?" She squeezed him again. He decided to get cute.

"You know, Greta, I normally decline sexual invitations from delicous looking naked women who have a fresh husbandly corpse in their closet, but in your case, my dear, I just might make an exception."

He pulled her toward him and kissed her, full on the mouth, tongues aroar. Man, he thought, what a mouth! She kissed him back with a passion he sensed was long denied her by the rough-ass Jake. Still kissing her, he opened one eye and stole a peek at the closet. Jake was watching with glazed over eyes. Enjoy yourself, Jake, Tag thought. Jake winked at him.

They kissed a second time, and he then undressed. The two of them, both naked now, and still standing less than six feet from Jake's dead eyes, kissed a third time. It was heaven for them both, but not much fun for old Jake, it is to be assumed.

Greta dropped to her knees and placed her right hand on the base of his cock. She looked up at him. "You're big, Tag, nice and big. I like big. Always have." She put her mouth on the head of his cock and moved down on it. Tag winced. Her teeth felt way too sharp for his general comfort. He placed a hand on her chin and tilted her face up toward him.

"Open your mouth wider, Darling, and use less teeth. OK?"

She nodded and placed her mouth back on his pulsing penis. This time, she felt a little better to him, but he was still aware of her teeth. Then, all of a sudden, she jumped a foot in the air, her teeth raking him painfully. She screamed out, "Ooooooooh, no!"

"What is it?" He hollered at her. Had she lost a tooth? A filling?

"Jake! He winked at me! He's still alive!" She was trembling now. It took a bit of explaining and persuading to convince her it was just a trick of light, and that Jake, the bastard, was not winking at anyone, and wouldn't for the rest of eternity.

"Greta, why don't I close the closet door if it bothers you so much?"

"No, Tag. I want him to watch. I want him to see me suck you off and fuck you silly. I'm all right now, really I am." She knelt before him once more. Calmed somewhat, she went back to the task at hand. Tag winced again. Then once more.

Greta tried her best to suck Tag's cock really well, but she was no Lucy Fern. Or even a Mergie. Far from it. Her mouth was too small and her teeth way too sharp. They were cutting into him now. Both going and coming.

Tag said gently, "Less teeth, dear." She tried her best, but it was a losing proposition. Shit, he thought, I'd better fuck her before my dick feels like its gone through a paper shredder! He winced at the thought. He'd had enough.

Helping her up from her kneeling position, he picked her up bodily and placed her gently in the center of the big king-size bed. Her legs spread wide as she landed, her pussy fully on display. He joined her on the bed and placed his head between her legs and proceeded to eat her out. She moaned in response to his first small, tentative lick. He worked her this way for a while. Then he crawled between her legs and placed his penis at the entrance to her moist, very ready pussy.

He fucked her gently at first, then quite quickly, and then quite violently as if she were a rag doll. He bucked and pumped and pistoned in and out of her. She was getting wilder and wilder with each stroking action. Her legs would fly out to the sides and then wrap themselves around his back, his ass, his legs. Her hands were clawing at his back, her teeth nibbling and biting on his neck and shoulders. The same sharp teeth she used for dick shredding. It hurt like hell, but Tag didn't care. He was beyond mere pain.

That she had come, he had no doubts. It was now his turn. He gave one last series of hard, deep fucks to her hot, wet pussy and then exploded within her. As he spurted and pulsated deep within, he felt her cunt muscles flexing and chewing on him, urging him on. He collapsed onto her and buried his face into her delicate neck. She moaned and said, "I love you." He knew she didn't mean it for real, so he said back, "I love you, too." For the moment, they had both meant it.

He crawled off of her and nestled beside her, taking her into his arms. They both looked over at Jake at the same time. Jake's dead eyes were looking right at them. If he had been turned on by what he saw happen, you'd never know it. His cock was still flaccid. Tag had a silly idea pop into his head.

"Greta, Jake's not enjoying our little sex show. Why don't you get up and go suck on his little pricky a bit and give him a treat?" He was joking, but she surprised him by escaping his arms, leaving the bed, and rushing over to Jake.

"Greta, I was only . . . "

As she kneeled down between Jake's hairy outsplayed legs and took the very dead penis in her hands, wobbling it around, Tag said, "Greta! You're crazy! You wouldn't . . . " She would. Tag watched as she engulfed the corpse's prick with her mouth and proceeded to suck on it. She did this for a time and then stood up.

"No use, Tag, he's impotent! Just like when he was alive!" She joined Tag in the bed once more. He looked shell-shocked, but he could still play cutesy.

"Think Viagra would help?" he asked. Then she got cutesy.

"Tag, Jake was such a prick that if he took Viagra he'd only get taller!" Tag laughed and squeezed her to him. He spoke softly to her.

"Well, this is a new one for me. My first ménage à trois with a corpse. And the cops will probably arrest you for tampering with the evidence by leaving your DNA all over Jake's schlong." He squeezed her again after she had giggled.

"Plead insanity, hon. Tell them you thought he was stiff for the first time in years and you didn't want to miss out, dead or no. They'll go easy on you when you explain all about the winking eye. How it winked and winked while we were fucking up a storm right in front of him. I'll back your story. I'll tell how you cried and cried everytime you came. Poor new widow, I'll tell them, couldn't stop yelling until I shoved my cock in her mouth. They'll understand, being cops and all."

She shivered. "I'm not in any real trouble, am I, Tag?" Perhaps, he thought, my attempt at gallows humor went a tad too far.

"No, angel. If you didn't end his misery for him, you have nothing to worry about. Just don't tell the cops a thing. Lawyer up and let him do the talking for you. Sure, the cops will suspect you at first, that's only normal, but in time it won't mean crap. Of course, I'd appreciate your not mentioning our little romp in the hay to anyone, including the mouthpiece. OK?" He felt her nod.

They showered together, made more drinks, and Tag called the police. All they had left to do now was get quickly dressed and wait. Tag broke the silence.

"Did you kill him, Greta? Because if you did, you'll probably get caught and I won't be able to do a thing to help you."

"No, Tag, I didn't, but thanks for asking. Jake had a thousand people who had more reasons to want him gone that I have. Eventually, we'll probably learn who really did it, but for now, fuck Jake! And tell me the truth, Tag, were you as turned on as I was knowing Jake was in the closet?" She laughed.

"I hate to admit it, but I was. It was sort of like one of those threesomes in which the husband only wants to watch and be cuckolded at the same time. Only this time, the guy wasn't paying too much attention! Aside from the winks." They both laughed.

Then Greta thought of something deliriously silly. "Tag, what if the winks Jake gave to us weren't just a trick of the light? Huh?" She grinned at him and took a sip.

Tag winked at her. "We can only hope!" She laughed, long and hearty.

Well, the cops came, the body was removed, and before you could say cuckolded winking hubby, Tag was back in his office. With a horny, all business-like Ms. Lucy Fern. She locked the door behind him and, well, you know, they did the nasty. Twice.

A few days later, Tag read in the papers that the murder of Jake Stern had been solved. The killer was an amateur named Wilson Q. Wilson, one of Jake's many accountants. Q? Another Quiff? He would have shared it with Lucy, but it was her day off.

Seems the guy was pilfering from the company and Jake had gotten the goods on him and was planning on turning him in. All legal like, a first for Jake, probably. Well, the poor schmo, facing ruin both socially and financially, not to mention a long jail term, had taken what he thought was an easy out. Might have been except for one big mistake.

The dope had shot Jake with the dope's own gun. And then, stupidly to be sure, had hidden it in the Stern's own laundry basket! As if cops were not allowed to search people's dirty laundry, it being off limits and all.

Tag looked down at his desk calendar. He was free for the next four hours. Let's see, he thought, who shall it be for a nice fuckfest? Lucy? Mergie? Greta? Wanda? Or should he troll The Den for some strange? Or maybe give Cherry, the flower lady a ring? And Brenda, Lucy's roomie. Christ, he thought, so many women, so little time!

He smiled as he reached for the phone. One of those ladies was in for a rousing good time today, if she was up for it. She answered on the second ring.

"Hi, Baby, it's Tag. You free for some sexy shenanigans?"
She said she was . . .

The End.
"'From my mind, to your mind!"