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                 K R I S T E N' S    C O L L E C T I O N
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Helena Bonham Carter: Unlucky Kind of Guy
by Geminiguy (geminiguy7@hotmail.co.uk)

***

A chance encounter with a British movie star changes a 
guy's luck for the better. (MF, tit-fucking, 1st, 
anal, celeb-parody)

***

[Author's Note: This was a special request from Mister 
Dream. He even gave me some input on what he wanted. I 
hope this is to your liking... Oh, and here's a teaser 
(I hope I do it right) 
http://allhairstyles.tk/hairstyler/helena-bonham-
carter-hairstyles-for-2011-26.jpg G]

***

Once upon a time there was an unlucky type of guy 
who'd resigned himself to the fact that luck must be 
blind. Nothing ever went right for him. Growing up, he 
got more stitches and wore more casts on his arms and 
legs than any other kid. 

He flunked out of several colleges. He'd always been 
clumsy and would have been fired several times over if 
he didn't work at his own father's company, when he 
screwed up too bad they just shipped him off to 
another department [which fortunate for him wasn't 
often; his screw ups seemed to come in cycles]. It was 
sad because he actually had a lot of friends and 
wasn't a bad looking guy. Most of the time, that is. 

You see, he was good at one thing. One thing that was 
a bit of an addiction. He loved to jerk off. He was 
adept at it. The problem was he'd sweat a lot while 
jerking off and it was a bitch on his complexion. When 
it came down to giving up jerking off or having a 
clear face [and boy, did he look like a pizza face], 
he resigned to the fact that he couldn't fight fate.  

He was addicted to jerking off. Besides, he knew he'd 
be a virgin until he died, so why take this away? His 
real passion was celebrities. Short ones, dark-haired, 
nice bodies... His longtime favorite had been Helena 
Bonham Carter. Just the mere mention of her name made 
his cock hard. He had all of Helena's nude scenes on 
his computer [which he rarely used, his bad luck had 
wrecked over a dozen already]. 

His favorites he'd downloaded to his phone, an 
expensive waterproof model [his sweaty jerk fests had 
ruined about half a dozen]. His favorite was of 
Helena's butt bent over, her hairy pussy showing 
between her thighs... He liked to imagine that Helena 
shaved hers. 

His best friend felt the only reason actresses have 
unshaven pussies in movies was because if they showed 
'lips' it would be classified as pornography. He once 
had a dream he was fucking Helena [she was doing the 
fucking, riding him hard] and her pussy was perfectly 
smooth. He remembered how real it'd felt, how vivid...  

He'd woken up in a pool of his own jizz. What he 
really got off on, though, was Helena's tits. He 
couldn't help noticing how having 2 kids had greatly 
increased her boobs. He wished he had some nude pics 
of her after the babies but he would have to 
fantasize. But he hadn't thought about Helena lately. 
He'd had too much on his mind. He was nervous about 
work. 

There were only so many departments left for him to 
get moved to and he was due for a major screw-up. He 
was so worried and nervous he hadn't been able to 
sleep much, let alone jerk off [which, of course, 
cleared up his face nicely]. 

He had made it through the work week, it was Friday 
afternoon. He stopped at his favorite pizza place and 
ordered 5 pizzas to go. Why? Because he had no plans 
but to barricade himself in his apartment until Monday 
morning and survive on pizza. Plus he got a sixth one 
free. He was actually feeling good as he exited the 
pizzeria; 6 pizzas weighing pleasantly in his arms, 
the aroma wafting up into his nostrils also 
pleasantly.

He stepped down onto the sidewalk and everything 
happened quickly. He never saw the person in a hurry 
coming from his left. As he stepped down onto the 
sidewalk he collided immediately with said person. 
Pizzas flew everywhere. All his happy thoughts left 
him suddenly. He'd been used to his bad luck and 
always took it quietly.

This time he lost it. He growled out loud. "I am such 
a clutz! This always happens to me, why can't I do 
anything right?" He began to rant. He was still 
ranting when the person he'd bumped into [who he'd 
forgotten] said in a calm, pleasant, British-accented 
voice, "Don't blame yourself, it was bludy my fault. I 
shouldn't have been in such a hurry..." 

He recognized that voice immediately. The red he was 
seeing dissipated as he calmed, visibly drained. He 
turned to her. "You're Helena Bonham Carter..." 

Helena began to smile at being recognized but the look 
on her face quickly changed to concern. "Are you all 
right?" Helena asked. "You don't look so good." 

He gave her a half-hearted smile. "I've just had a lot 
on my mind lately, putting a lot of stress on 
myself..." 

"And I finally lit the fuse that set you off." 

"N-no," he started to say, then he felt the strength 
leave his legs and he fell to his knees. 

Helena dropped to her knees next to him. That's when 
he noticed one of the pizzas had ended up all over her 
expensively looking blouse. "Gee, I'm sorry about 
that..." He blushed. 

She looked down at herself and laughed. "A soak in 
cold water'll do the trick, right know I'm more 
worried about you. Let me help with these. They mostly 
seem okay, still in their boxes." 

"Except for the one on you," he replied without humor. 

Helena smiled. "Take me back to your place so I can 
soak my blouse and you can tell me what's on your 
mind." 

Who was he to argue with Helena Bonham Carter? 
Besides, she wanted to come to his place. He knew 
nothing would become of it, but still... He felt the 
strength return to his legs. He salvaged his pizzas, 
dumping the empty sixth box, and led Helena to his 
car. He put the pizzas in the trunk.

He opened the passenger door for Helena then ran 
around to the driver's side and jumped in. He drove 
home as fast as the law would allow [why test his bad 
luck?]. As soon as they walked in the door Helena 
unbuttoned the cuffs on her blouse then began 
unbuttoning her blouse, slowly revealing a red and 
black low-cut bra that showed a lot of tit. She slid 
out of it and asked where the bathroom was. 

He pointed to the bathroom and then headed to the 
kitchen. He put the pizzas in the oven, he wasn't so 
hungry now and he wasn't sure about Helena. All of a 
sudden he got very nervous realizing he was alone with 
a celebrity. A married celebrity. Then he realized his 
cock was rock hard and his face grew hot. How long had 
he been erect? Probably from the moment he realized 
who she was... 

He quickly sat at the kitchen to hide his erection. 
Helena finally wandered in looking relaxed despite 
being in only her skimpy bra, black skirt and heels. 
"You have a very nice place," She commented. 

"Th-thank you. Ummm, do you want to borrow a shirt?"

"No, thank you, I'm fine." 

"Do you want some pizza?" 

"I'm not really big on Italian food." 

"Oh." He was trying to think of more small talk. "What 
are you doing here? In this town I mean?" 

"I just decided to take a holiday, my husband's away 
on a movie and the nanny is watching the children," 
Helena answered. "Now enough small talk. Tell me 
what's been bothering you now." 

He sighed. Then he told her everything [except the 
jerking off of course]. When he was done Helena was 
moved. "Oh, you poor thing." She put her hand on his 
which caught him off guard. He jumped up, knocking the 
chair over, putting Helena face-to-face with his 
massive erection. 

Her eyes went wide. "Oh, my... Did I cause that?" She 
asked. 

Red-faced he said nothing, looking down at his feet. 
"Don't be embarrassed. I actually consider it a high 
compliment." 

He still said nothing. "You're a virgin, aren't you?" 

His head shot up and he looked at Helena wide-eyed. 
His mouth fell open to speak but no words came out.   

"It's okay," She said assuringly. "I should have 
stepped earlier that you were. And I think you've had 
a big crush on me," Helena smiled. "What you need is a 
good experience to build your confidence..." She slid 
down to her knees in front of him. She looked up at 
him as she undid his belt then opened his khakis. She 
pushed them down with his briefs. 

Helena moaned. "You do have a big one... Biggest I 
ever saw..." She reached back and unclasped her bra. 
She let it slide to the floor. Helena's dark nipples 
stuck out hard. She leaned forward and wrapped her 
large tits around his long, thick cock. He moaned and 
closed his eyes. This was a hundred times better than 
jerking off, he thought. Helena's large firm tits felt 
like pillows around his throbbing cock. 

He knew he couldn't last long. Within a minute he 
groaned and began to jizz her neck. Helena gasped and 
pulled his cock out. She jerked it, sending bolt after 
bolt of hot jizz across her tits. When she'd milked 
him dry she then rubbed his load into her tits.

Helena moaned and finally she looked up at him and 
smiled wickedly. "That was just what I needed... And 
you needed too I think." She helped me out of his 
shoes then pushed his khakis and briefs off of him. 
Helena stood up and led him to his bedroom. She 
unbuttoned his shirt and pushed it off of him. Then 
Helena pushed him onto his bed. She kicked off her 
heels and reached back and unzipped her skirt. She let 
fall and pool around her feet. Helena now only had on 
a black garter belt, black stocking and red and black 
panties that matched her bra. She wore the panties 
over the garters and easily slid them off. 

He noticed that her pussy wasn't shaved, Helena's dark 
brown bush was thick and luxuriant. He wasn't 
disappointed, considering what had already happened 
and what he knew was about to happen... Helena climbed 
up onto the bed and hovered over him. She straddled 
him, taking his revived cock in her hand and impaling 
herself on it. It was just like the dream, he thought, 
remembering it vividly... Helena groaned as she 
bounced up and down on his cock.

Her tits bounced as she rode him. He couldn't take his 
eyes off of them... He'd never touched a woman's tits 
before; he tentatively reached up and cupped them. She 
gasped. He began kneading them then twisting her 
nipples. Helena was moaning louder and riding him 
harder. Soon she began to cum, howling in orgasm. 

He kept playing with her tits as she rode him hard. He 
lasted longer this time. Helena had come over 2 dozen 
times when she sensed he was about to cum himself. 
"No!" She gasped. "Not in my pussy... I don't want to 
get pregnant again." She slid off his cock and took 
hold of it again. She slid her anus down around it and 
howled at the tightness [she'd never done it before or 
even thought about]. 

Helena skewered her butt hole down around it, gasping 
for breath, until she had his cock fully in her. 
Helena groaned as she slowly rode him, getting used to 
it up her butt. Once her butt grew accustom to the 
invasion, Helena fucked him hard, multi-orgasming. She 
lost track of how many orgasms she had...  

Helena was so lost in pleasure she was caught off-
guard when he blew his load up in her butt, inducing 
another orgasm. She collapsed on top of him, both a 
sweaty mess... Helena lay against her head against his 
chest for the longest time. Then she turned her head 
to face him, her hair fallen across her lovely face, 
and smiled. "I know how I'm spending my holiday..." 

And that was how his good luck started.

THE END 

http://www.cinemablend.com/images/sections/7595/helena
_bonham_carter/7595.jpg

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
It's okay to *READ* stories about unprotected sex with
others outside a monogamous relationship. But it isn't
okay to *HAVE* unprotected sex with people other than
a trusted partner. 4-million people around the world 
contract HIV every year. You only have one body per 
lifetime, so take good care of it!
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Kristen's collection - Celebrity Parody Archive