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K R I S T E N' S C O L L E C T I O N
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WARNING!
This text file contains sexually explicit
material. If you do not wish to read this
type of literature, or you are under age,
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Copyright 1996 Jim Fix - This story may not be
reproduced in any form for profit without the written
permission of the author. This story may be freely
distributed with this notice attached.
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My Sister's Love
by Jim Fix (address withheld)
***
A coming of age story, only in this story the boy and
girl are siblings. It started with just a little
curiosity, then circumstances that allowed the pair to
explore their feelings uninhibited, and finally ruined
them for any other relationships in their lives. (bg,
MF, 1st, inc rom)
***
The summer I turned ten my parents bought a house in
the country. The property was a remnant of what was
once a large farm but all the cropland had been sold as
a separate parcel. My father bought the old farmhouse
and barn along with several acres of woodland and
elderberry thickets. The price was right and we could
move out of the city.
My sister, Penny, was almost two years older than I and
as a result of the age gap we had separate lives while
living in the apartment complex in the city. When we
moved to the farm we were thrown together as playmates.
There were no other children who lived close to us and
out of expediency we became companions. We had a grand
time exploring our new, exciting surroundings together
and in a week or two despite being siblings had become
fast friends.
We explored the woods and the thickets along the little
creek that bordered our place. We were explorers in a
trackless jungle or a prince and princess who had been
banished to the forest by a wicked queen. There was one
place in the creek that was deep and wide enough for
swimming.
We would play in the thickets until the sound of
mother's police whistle called us to the house. We were
left pretty much on our own and played endlessly but
when Mom blew that whistle we knew we had to run to the
house immediately. We were in ten and eleven year old
heaven for we had unlimited freedom compared to the
city.
The barn was large with a hay loft in the top. The
ground floor was one large open area with a concrete
floor. Dad used this as his workshop and garaged his
and mother's cars there. In the loft there were two
rooms and a bath with a shower partitioned off from the
main area. One room had been used for storage and had
shelves on two sides. The other had been used as living
quarters for a hired hand. My sister and I claimed this
room and the loft for our rainy day playroom.
The little room, as we called the hired hand's room,
was still furnished with a double bed, a work counter
with a gas hot plate, a space heater, table, and
chairs. Mom had helped us clean the place up and put
fresh linen and blankets on the bed. We had brought a
radio, some books, toys, and games from the house to
give us something to do when we were banished to the
barn. Dad had hung a rope swing from the rafters in the
loft to round out our little private world.
One rainy morning we were being our noisy selves in the
house when Mom sent us to the barn to play and give her
some peace. After what seemed like ages we tired of
books and decided to explore the barn. We had looked
everywhere before but this time we explored in detail.
When Mom called us for lunch we had looked in every
box, every corner, and every crevasse in the loft.
After lunch we went back to the little room to play and
after a while lay on the bed and took a nap together.
I woke up to a strange noise, my sister was tugging at
a board behind the bed. When I asked her what she was
doing she told me that she had found a loose board and
was tugging at it when she saw something hidden behind
it. I helped her and soon we had worked it away from
the wall enough to see some papers hidden in the space
in the wall. Eagerly we pulled everything out and lay
it on the bed.
There were several magazines and what appeared to be
little comic books. I took one of the comic books and
began to leaf through it looking at the pictures. Wow!
I had never seen one of my favorite comic characters
doing things like this. My sister was looking at the
pictures in a magazine and sat transfixed as she turned
the pages. We had found some nameless farm hand's
erotic stash.
"Bobby have you ever seen anything like this before?"
she asked.
"No, are the people doing what I think they are doing?"
I asked in return. I knew about sex from playground
conversations but had never seen exactly how the act
was accomplished. In the magazines there were photos
that were explicit and left nothing to the imagination.
I moved to Penny's side and looked at the pictures with
her. The men had penises that looked huge and the women
seemed to have an ax wound between their legs
surrounded by a mat of hair. I knew that my penis was
no match for the examples in the pictures.
After a few minutes Penny began to answer my question.
"Remember when we lived in the apartment that sometimes
we would hear funny noises coming from Mom and Dad's
bedroom? This is what they were doing."
"Is this how adults do it Penny?"
"Yes... It's supposed to feel good and be fun," was
Penny's reply.
"It looks like it would be uncomfortable to me." I
didn't believe what I had just said for I had the
biggest erection ever from looking at the pictures. I
was also acutely aware of Penny sitting beside me.
"It's supposed to be the best thing ever... Can you
keep a secret Bobby?"
"What secret?"
"We won't tell Mom and Dad about these books. We will
keep them secret and read them when we are up here
alone. If we tell they will take the books away from
us."
I didn't want to lose this treasure before I got a
chance to see all of it and if I crossed Penny she
would pound me into the middle of next year so I
agreed.
We heard our Dad open the barn door to park his car and
we quickly replaced everything in the hiding place and
replaced the loose board. Unless you were a few inches
away from it the board looked like it was firmly
attached. Someone had made a clever hiding place. We
ran down the stairs and greeted Dad as he parked the
car. We all ran to the house through the rain.
*
The next morning Penny and I went to the barn and spent
the morning looking at pictures. Penny read to me out
of the magazines and I read to her out of the little
comic books. I had no idea of the many ways to have sex
but by lunch time I had seen pictures of every
conceivable way a man and a woman could copulate. There
were detailed pictures of oral, anal, and straight sex.
Penny and I discussed the pictures and found some of
them downright funny, some scary, and all interesting.
I had an erection that mercifully my jeans hid and I
could feel the heat radiate from Penny's warm body
close by me.
After lunch we returned to the loft and continued to
read the magazines. We had looked at all the pictures
at least twice over leaving the stories and text as the
only thing new left to explore. Penny read a story
about a young couple's first lovemaking experience and
the words struck fire in my groin. The detailed
descriptions of what they did and how it felt drove me
to states of desire I had never felt before. I noticed
the tiny beads of sweat on Penny's forehead and upper
lip.
I could see her shorts pressed against her crotch as
she sat cross-legged on the bed. Every detail of her
body stood out as she read and etched itself in my
consciousness. That was the moment she ceased being my
sister and became an object of my physical desire. I
was lying on my stomach in front of her and I began to
stare at her crotch and inner thighs.
As she read my imagination began to take her clothes
off and I fantasized about what she would look like
naked in front of me. As my erect penis pressed into
the mattress I imagine
d it sinking into Penny's soft nether parts.
Penny noticed me staring at her and smiled as she
asked, "Would you like to do that with a girl?"
Caught off guard by her question I had to think a few
seconds before I answered. I wanted to tell her that I
wanted to do it with her but was afraid, besides she
was my sister. Brothers and sisters didn't do things
like that together, did they? I took the safe way out
and answered, "I would like to make love to a girl
sometime. The problem is finding a girlfriend out here
in the boondocks."
Penny laughed at my answer and replied, "I would like
to make love with a boy also but I'm a little afraid.
They say that the first time a girl makes love it hurts
when she loses her virginity."
"Why does it hurt the first time?" I asked her.
Penny explained about hymens and what happened to a
girl her first time. I listened fascinated by her
explanation, visualizing a penis disappearing into a
vagina and wondering how much blood would result when
the hymen tore. Too bad girls had a tattletale between
their legs.
We had been shy about discussing these things only this
morning but as the day had progressed that had been
overcome by curiosity. We were talking about another
girl and another boy as we discussed our desire for
sexual experience. I wanted to get the conversation to
shift to us but couldn't figure out how to arrange
that. As I tried to think of an opening to turn the
conversation to specifics Mom called us to the house.
Mom had made a pitcher of lemonade and we sat under a
shade tree with her and talked as we sipped on icy
glasses of fresh squeezed lemonade. When we finished
Mom went about her chores and we eliminated one
activity after another from our list of things to do.
The afternoon was hot so we decided to go wading in the
creek. We put on bathing suits and ran out to the
shallow area that was in sight of the house and waded
down to the deeper swimming hole. We splashed and swam
in the creek for a while and then lay on the bank
soaking up the sun.
I must have dozed off for I was awakened by Penny's
laughter. When I looked at her she pointed at my
swimming trunks and said, "What's that?"
That was an erection making a tent of my trunks.
Embarrassed, I quickly rolled over on my tummy to hide
my condition and Penny quit laughing. She began to talk
about our secret books and as I visualized the pictures
I became even more aroused and my erection refused to
subside. I became uncomfortable laying on my tummy so I
sat up and crossed my legs as we continued our
conversation. I racked my brain trying to think of a
way to broach the subject of us when out of the clear
blue sky Penny asked, "Bobby, would you show me yours?"
I was surprised speechless for a moment, my sister was
asking to see my penis.
I couldn't think of anything to say except, "Why?"
"I just want to see it. We've looked at all the
pictures of boys and girls and I would like to see what
a real one looks like," she answered.
I remembered the pictures of the women and the large
gash they had between their legs. I was more than
curious about Penny as well. "Will you show me yours
too?" I asked and waited expectantly for her answer.
Penny was quiet for a while and seemed to be thinking.
Finally she said, "Yes but you first."
Feeling very self-conscious I pulled my trunks down and
lay back on the grass. Penny moved close by my side and
sat staring at my erect penis. She reached out and
touched it on the head and I flinched at this
unexpected contact.
"I'm sorry, did I hurt you?" she asked.
"No, you just surprised me that's all," I replied.
"Can I touch it again?"
"Yes, but be careful for that's tender down there," I
said.
Penny explored everything from the head to my scrotum.
She asked me questions and I answered them as best as I
could. After she had satisfied her curiosity I pulled
up my trunks and then asked her to show me hers.
She was reluctant but after some argument she pulled
the bottom of her swimsuit down and lay on her back
with her knees bent and her legs parted so I could get
a good look. There was some peach fuzz and she had a
little slit, not a huge gaping gash as the women in the
pictures did. I gently pulled the lips apart so I could
see inside and there was a little hole on the bottom
and a tiny fold of skin with a little bump at the top.
When I touched the pink flesh inside it was wet and
slippery. Penny told me that when she touched the
little bump at the top it tickled and felt good. I put
my finger on it and she giggled and squirmed away from
me. Unfortunately, Mom's whistle prematurely
interrupted my explorations. Penny pulled up her
swimsuit and we ran to the house.
At dinner that night Mom announced that her brother and
sister had called and wanted to visit with their
spouses. After talking things over with Dad they agreed
to the visit.
Mom and Dad discussed the arrangements they would have
to make for the visit and when they discussed sleeping
arrangements it was obvious that Penny and I were
losing our rooms temporarily. Penny suggested that we
could sleep in the little room in the barn while we had
visitors. After some discussion between Mom and Dad
that was settled.
*
The next morning we moved some of our clothes to the
loft and enough toilet articles to stock our bathroom.
We were excited about "camping out" and asked if we
could sleep there tonight. After lunch we helped Mom
get our rooms ready for our visitors. Tomorrow we would
have aunts and uncles coming out our ears.
After dinner Penny and I went to the barn and got ready
for bed. Penny changed into a nightgown and I put on
pajamas. We sat talking about all the excitement
tomorrow when we heard someone coming up the stairs.
The stairs made loud squeaks when anyone climbed up or
down and made it impossible for anyone to get up to the
loft unheard. Mom and Dad came in and sat with us for
awhile before tucking us into bed.
We lay awake for a long time continuing our talk about
the visit tomorrow. The sandman slipped up on us and
eventually we fell asleep. I had never slept with
anyone before and I was awakened several times during
the night by Penny's movements.
*
The next morning I was awakened by Penny getting back
in bed after going to the bathroom. She slid up close
to me and the warm place around me. I felt two cold
feet on my legs as she complained about the cold floor.
Her back as turned toward me and as she snuggled closer
to get warm her butt ran into my morning erection. I
started to pull away but she only followed me and
pressed against me even harder.
"Does that thing stay like that all the time?" she
asked.
"No, but first thing in the morning before I go pee it
is hard."
"What happens after you pee?"
"It gets soft and limp," I answered.
"Go pee so I can see it soft."
I got out of bed and went to the bathroom and took a
morning whiz. I quickly returned to the bed and climbed
in and snuggled against Penny's warm body. I felt her
grope for my penis and feel it while it was soft. As
she explored it became hard again.
"I thought it got soft after you went to the bathroom,"
she said.
"It did but when you played with it I got excited and
it got hard again."
"Does it feel good when I touch you like this?" she
asked.
"Yes, I like that but it would feel better if I pulled
my pajamas down." I said as I slid the bottoms down to
my knees.
Penny began to play with my penis, stroking it up and
down with her hand. I was in heaven.
"I read in one of the magazines that this was supposed
to feel good when you did this with your hand." she
said. "Bobby, you can touch me there if you want."
When I reached over for her I was surprised to find her
gown was up around her waist and she wasn't wearing
panties. I slid my finger into her slit and she guided
me to her little button and showed me how to stroke it
gently. I loved the feel of her warm soft vagina and
the wet slippery flesh under my fingers. I slid a
fingertip in the little hole and was rewarded by a
little moan from Penny.
We continued to masturbate each other until we heard
the back door of the barn open and Dad yelled up at us
to get up and come to breakfast. We shouted back an
answer and Dad returned to the house.
Penny cautioned me to keep quiet about what we had been
doing if I wanted to continue to have fun with her. I
had no intention of saying anything for I figured that
Mom and Dad would kill us both if they found out,
besides I had enjoyed this morning more than anything I
had ever done before. I had never kissed my sister on
the lips but it seemed like the thing to do so I gave
her a big hug and a sloppy kiss. She surprised me by
returning my kiss and pressed her body against me. My
erect penis probed the softness between her legs and it
felt wonderful. I moved my hips around trying to slip
between her legs but she kept her thighs pressed
together. We lay this way for a moment or two before we
broke apart and got out of bed.
"For a little brother you're not bad," she said. "Think
you can wait until tonight? Maybe we'll try some new
things."
"Whatever you want Penny."
"I'll hold you to your promise Bobby."
We finished dressing and ran to the house and our
waiting breakfast.
The guests arrived in mid afternoon and everything was
in an uproar. We were introduced to aunts and uncles we
hadn't seen in a long time. Penny and I had the usual
fuss made over us and received the usual amount of hugs
and kisses. The rest of the day was a blur of people
talking about things I didn't understand.
It was late evening when we got back to our little room
and slid into bed. We were both so tired that we fell
asleep almost immediately. We were awakened by someone
coming up the stairs the next morning to get us for
breakfast. It was our uncle and he made sure we were
awake before he left. We didn't have time for anything
except getting up and dressing for breakfast.
It was Saturday and Mom and Dad had a whole day
planned. We went sightseeing around the countryside and
to a movie that evening. Penny and I were so worn out
we didn't do anything except sleep when we went to bed.
The next morning we were awakened again by our uncle.
We spent Sunday at home. Everyone came out to the barn
and took a tour of our loft. They thought it was grand
to have such a nice place to play out of the weather.
Penny whispered to me that she thought it would be
grand if we could have some time to play alone.
After lunch we just sat around and acted lazy until
someone mentioned that it was hot. That brought a
suggestion of swimming. It wasn't long until everyone
went trooping to the creek and jumped into the cool
water in our swimming hole. We played and splashed for
the rest of the afternoon. After dinner we sat around
talking about nothing and just relaxing. When we
finally made it to bed Penny and I fell asleep
immediately after all the activity of the day.
*
The next morning we woke up before anyone came to get
us and were just getting into mutual masturbation when
someone called us for breakfast. We managed a hug and
kiss. Again I tried to push my penis inside Penny's
soft nether parts but she pulled away and told me I
would have to wait until we had the time to do it
right.
After lunch Penny and I were left at home in the care
of our uncle and his wife while Mom took her sister and
her husband into town. Dad had to work all week so that
left the four of us at the farm. Penny and I went to
the barn to play and as we sat in the little room
playing a game we noticed, from our window, our uncle
and his wife walking toward the swimming hole. About a
half hour later we finished the game and decided to
join them.
We changed into our bathing suits and walked toward the
creek. Penny stopped and put her finger to her lips
signaling for quiet just before we got to the clearing.
I could hear some strange noises coming from that
direction. Quietly Penny led me to a place off the
trail where we could see into the clearing without
being seen. When we got into position we were in for
quite a show. Uncle was laying on his back and his wife
was on top rocking back and forth. Her back was toward
us and we could see all the action clearly. His big
penis was buried in her vagina and she was working up
and down on it. We could hear the wet slippery sounds
they made each time they thrust in and out.
Penny and I lay side by side in the bushes and watched
as their lovemaking progressed. Uncle was making
grunting noises and trying to thrust deeper into his
wife's vagina and she was making little animal noises
in her throat as she matched him thrust for thrust.
Uncle lunged upward and she let out a loud moan and
collapsed on his chest. They lay very still kissing
each other and we could see a thick white liquid
dribble down the shaft of his penis. After a few
minutes they got up and went into the water naked.
Penny and I slipped back to the barn and changed our
clothes.
We talked about what we had seen and Penny asked me if
I would like to do that with her tonight when we got to
bed. I had a raging erection and was ready then but she
figured our uncle and his wife would be coming back
from swimming any time. We didn't want to get caught
but we were both aroused by what we had observed and
wanted to try it ourselves as soon as possible.
After dinner we excused ourselves as quickly as manners
allowed and went to our little room and got ready for
bed. We lay in the darkness for a while and when no one
came to tuck us in we started kissing each other. I
slid a hand between Penny's legs and began to play with
her and massage her little button with a fingertip. She
began to stroke my penis with her hand and when I tried
to get on top she stopped me and got out of bed.
She grabbed a bath towel from the bathroom and put it
under me as I lay on my back. Penny got on top and
straddled my hips and put my penis against her little
slit. She pushed down but it wouldn't penetrate. Every
time we tried to push it in it would either bend or
slip aside. She moved down and took me in her mouth. I
had seen pictures of this but hardly expected my sister
to do it to me. She bobbed her head up and down a few
times and I was wet with her saliva.
Again she sat astride me and tried to insert my penis.
This time it would go partially inside but would not
break through her hymen. We tried until my penis dried
and things got painful for both of us.
Next she moved up until her soft mound was above my
face. She asked me to kiss her and rub her little
button with my tongue. I was in such a state I would
have done anything to get to try to penetrate her warm
softness again so I did as I was told. What I thought
would be quite revolting turned out to be a very
pleasant experience.
I gingerly pushed my tongue into her hairless slit and
massaged her button. I grew braver and began to thrust
my tongue into her little hole as deep as it would
reach. It wasn't too long until my face was wet and
slippery from my saliva and her juices.
She was making little noises in her throat like auntie
was this afternoon when she pulled away and again took
a position astride my hips. I was rock hard with an
erection and she was wet and slippery from my deep
tonguing. She took my penis and placed it in the
opening of her vagina and pressed downward until she
met the resistance of her hymen. She stopped for a
second or two before she thrust down firmly and I felt
something let go and slid deep inside her.
Penny lay atop me and hugged me close as I enjoyed
sensations that were almost indescribably pleasant. My
penis was trapped in a warm, wet, slippery prison that
no prisoner would ever try to escape. I could feel
little ripples of contractions deep inside Penny. She
kissed me and forced her tongue between my lips and
deep into my mouth. We lay like this for a long time
kissing each other deeply and enjoying the joining of
our bodies.
Penny began to rock back and forth and I matched her
movements. To this day I cannot describe the pleasure I
felt as the warm slippery flesh of Penny's vagina slid
up and down on my penis. After a while I could feel the
walls of her vagina tighten and then a tickling
sensation began in the head of my penis. When the
tickling became almost unbearable Penny contracted
strongly and lay limp on top of me. We lay quietly in
each other's arms and enjoyed the intimacy of the
moment.
After a while Penny got up and led me to the bathroom.
There were bloodstains on me and between her legs. The
towel she had put under me was stained also. We cleaned
up in the shower, returned to bed, and fell asleep
cuddled up spoon fashion.
*
We woke up early and lay in each other's arms kissing
and generally making clumsy attempts at foreplay. When
we tried to make love again Penny was too sore to enjoy
it so we just talked about the night before and our new
circumstances.
Until this summer we had never been really close. I
guess our relationship was normal for a brother and
sister for we had traveled in different circles. The
summer had forced us to keep each other's company and
this was the morning after the night before. Penny had
taken an irreversible step and we lay discussing the
consequences as we understood them at our age. One
thing was certain and that was I wanted to stay close
to my sister. I felt protective and held her close as
we lay talking. I felt content to have her laying
beside me in the warm bed.
I was concerned that I had hurt her last night but she
reassured me that everything was normal. She told me
that in a couple of days the soreness would be gone and
we could enjoy each other whenever we had an
opportunity.
That was the beginning of a long journey that continued
until Penny left for college. There were incidents of
interest that occurred such as the time when Penny had
her first period and scared me half to death. I watched
her breasts develop from two little nipples to a pair
of pert globes that I never tired of fondling and
kissing. Then there was the time when I matured enough
to ejaculate and we had to get serious about birth
control.
In the intervening years between that morning and
Penny's departure for college we grew up together,
matured together, and explored a forbidden love that
was as tender and deep as possible for two people. We
shared emotional bonds secured in the strength of a
brother, sister relationship and enriched with the
volatility of lovers. We were inseparable; friends and
lovers.
With a lot of luck we managed to keep our secret from
our parents and our friends. We seldom dated others and
when we did it was only to camouflage our private life.
One would be in agony while the other was with someone
else. One boy tried to take liberties with Penny on a
date and when she told me I was enraged. I cornered him
in a parking lot and the ferocity of my attack left him
unconscious and bleeding on the pavement. Penny had no
further problems with boys after that.
We used study as an excuse to be alone together in the
loft and as a result both of us made good grades. Our
parents were happy with our scholarship and seldom
invaded our private world in the little room. When we
were alone together our universe was complete. We were
a pair of studious nerds out of the mainstream of
teenage society.
I was devastated when Penny left home to go to the
university. I moped around for days and had a generally
hard time adjusting to life without her. We wrote long
letters to each other and poured out our hearts. Penny
kept reminding me that I would be graduating in the
spring and would be able to join her in the fall
semester but that was a whole year away.
First and foremost I missed Penny's company but it
wasn't long until I missed the other half of our
relationship more. I had sex regularly since I was ten
and the sudden celibacy Penny's absence imposed became
an unrelenting burden. I had never had relationships
with other girls and couldn't bring myself to start one
now. I loved my sister and we had pledged our loyalty
to each other. Absence makes the heart grow fonder and
I found out the hard way how true this was.
Penny came home over the Thanksgiving Holiday and we
had a fast and furious reunion. Christmas rolled around
and we had a glorious two weeks together. Spring break
came and went all too soon and then I had the long wait
until school was out.
We spent the summer together on the farm. Penny had
some studying to do before fall semester and we used
that as an excuse to spend long hours in our little
room. Sex was of paramount importance for the first
week or two but afterwards it became something to do
when the mood struck us. We were lovers with years of
time together and were as familiar as an old married
couple despite our ages.
This was to be our last summer together with no
responsibilities. The days and weeks rolled by and we
used the time to get reacquainted and deepen our
relationship. We had become young adults and fully
understood our unusual relationship. It was our
responsibility to keep our secret and protect our
parents from scandal.
In late July we had a family conference and discussed
the coming school year. Finances were the main topic
for the expense of two people in college was a major
item in our parent's budget. Penny had a scholarship
that covered tuition and fees and I had won a cash
scholarship that would just about cover the same. Room
and board was the big item. Penny suggested that we
rent a small apartment and then we could live together
and prepare our own meals. Mom and Dad liked the idea
and the item was settled.
Dad took some vacation days and we drove to the city
and looked for us a place to live. After some searching
we found a place that was within walking distance of
everything. It was a garage apartment behind an older
couple's house. They were very conservative and
wouldn't rent to an unmarried couple but a brother and
sister was a different matter. They were impressed that
the whole family had come to look at the place.
The furniture was sparse but in good shape. The
bedrooms had double beds and a table and chair for
study. The kitchen, dining, and living room was a
single large open area and quite homey. We had privacy
and a quiet neighborhood around us. The rent was
reasonable and Dad signed the lease.
We spent the rest of the week with our parents looking
for the little things to round out our new home. We
made one trip back to the farm and loaded our personal
belongings and extra household items that Mom donated.
By the weekend Penny and I had a nice place to live.
We spent the last few weeks before registration on the
farm with our parents. This was a bittersweet time for
all of us. I was the last to leave the family nest and
Mom and Dad were reluctant to let go. The days passed
and then the big day arrived. Our parents drove us to
the city and helped us get settled in. They spent the
night in our apartment and after breakfast the next
morning left for the farm. Penny and I found ourselves
alone in our own place.
We had been lovers for eight years but there was a
special magic about this morning. It was our first day
together on our own. We didn't have to listen with half
an ear for someone coming up the stairs. We could
simply lock the door and refuse to answer if anyone
knocked. For the first time in our lives we had real
privacy.
Penny was washing up the breakfast dishes and I went to
help her. We were two people, alone, with no pretenses
just doing the things that needed to be done. Penny
stood beside me dressed in a plain, comfortable dress
wearing no makeup with her hair in disarray. When we
got close to each other I could smell the real woman;
her musk, her sweat; and not what the perfumer's art
dictated. The books say that there are no known human
pheromones but I dispute that. Whoever wrote the book
has never had an intimate moment with a woman he loved
au naturel.
It began with an accidental touch; perhaps when I
handed her a plate to rinse. Then we both felt a need
to touch and be touched in the fleeting instants the
task allowed. A hip brushed a hip, shoulders brushed by
each other, fingers contacted fingers as the dishes
slowly moved from one side of the counter to the drain
rack. For a moment anything more than a caress in
passing would have been too much, an overload of
information for our nerve endings.
Like a drug we found a need for more and stood hip to
hip, the touch maintained, as our bodies found a need
for constant contact to communicate. Words would have
been an intrusion, everything that needed to be
exchanged passed between us in the warmth of our
touching. The flood of communication became too great
for the tiny contact of the hips and shoulders touched
to widen the channel and the need to feel the intimate
warmth of the other person became overwhelming as the
last item was put in the drain rack.
Wordlessly we turned to each other and embraced and
kissed pressing our bodies together as if we wanted to
join as one. As we stood locked in each other's arms
the real need defined itself, we wanted to give each
other the ultimate gift a man and a woman may share.
The distance to the bedroom became an infinite journey
of pauses to embrace and kiss never losing contact with
the exchange of sweet need continuously flowing through
the points of warm touching.
We made love gently, slowly savoring each second as a
unique experience in itself. We were in a timeless
place exploring the slopes of a mountain, up and down
each new side saving the climb to the summit until we
could hold back no longer. Unhurriedly we began our
final ascent and when we found release the earth moved,
not in the violence of an earthquake but the slow
geologic movement of continents.
New and deeper emotions were shared and our bonds of
love were forged even stronger. Words were inadequate
and we held each other in silence as our bodies
communicated on a primal level. We will never speak of
this moment but we will remember it always.
Timelessness must eventually give way to reality and
the demands of the real world intruded. It was lunch
time and a more mundane hunger had to be satisfied. We
got up and fixed a quick lunch. Afterward we sat
talking over coffee. There has been a fundamental
change between us.
Penny guides me through the labyrinth of registration
and enrollment. What could have been a bewildering
experience is only a series of things to do with her
guidance. At last I am firmly entrenched as a freshman
at a state university. As the weeks pass we settle into
our old pattern of high school. We are still considered
two studious nerds slightly out of the social
mainstream.
The weeks fade into months and soon the spring break is
upon us. Penny and I have to decide if we want to go on
the fast track and take summer courses. When we visit
the farm we discuss this with our parents. They are
pleased with our progress and grades but just a little
disappointed that we won't spend the summer at home.
Their pride over the fact that we have been selected to
take accelerated courses eventually overcomes their
disappointment and they endorse our plans
wholeheartedly.
We return to school and soon are absorbed in our
studies. Time passes by and finally the day comes that
we thought was in the far future. Penny will graduate.
It seems like only yesterday that I was a lowly
freshman and now I will be a senior. What are we to do?
We spend long hours discussing our options but there
are no answers other than reality. Penny will have to
move on and I will have to stay here and finish school.
We hope she can find a job close by but fate delivers a
cruel blow, all her job offers are half a continent
away. We have to accept our fate and she accepts an
offer on the west coast. I plan to graduate and then
join her after graduation. With that out of the way we
finish the school year in peace.
The inevitable day comes and with our parents I see her
off at the airport. In a matter of hours my sister and
my lover will be far away. When I get back to our empty
apartment I play our last night together in my mind. I
remember our frantic lovemaking over and over until it
is only a blur. As I look around the apartment so many
things remind me of her and I think about moving. When
I think about moving the thought of breaking my last
link to Penny is too much to bear and I stay in our old
place.
I throw myself into my studies to dull the pain of
separation. I live for the days that Penny's letters
arrive. Again we pour out our hearts to each other on
paper. I can't afford a telephone so we seldom call
each other. Hearing her voice is too much and I settle
for letters.
When she came home for Christmas we had a stolen week
together. She tells our parents that she will arrive a
week later. After our week alone we spend the holidays
on the farm with the family and then it is over. She
must go back to her job.
As January fades into February I begin to notice a
subtle change in her letters. There seems to be some
distance between us, not the geography but an emotional
distance. I can't quite put my finger on what has
changed but something has changed. I get a letter just
before spring break that mystifies me. She asks me to
stay in the apartment and she will visit me but I
mustn't tell Mom and Dad she is visiting. I agree and
make excuses to Mom and Dad and await her arrival.
I meet her at the airport and we fall into each other's
arms. I smell her perfume and I am immediately
intoxicated. After collecting her bags we go to a
restaurant and have dinner. Afterward we dash to the
apartment and catch up on so many missed nights. The
next day is a blur of becoming reacquainted. We catch
up on events in our lives and we catch up on lost
moments in the bedroom.
After one particularly satisfying session we are lying
side by side and I am completely sated by our
lovemaking. This seems like a good time to discuss our
future.
"Penny, I have been offered a grant to get my Master's
Degree. I haven't had time to refuse yet but I will let
them know that I won't be accepting after this break."
"Why would you refuse it?" she asked.
"Why indeed, because I will join you as soon as I
graduate in June. We have been apart for too long."
Penny began to cry and sobbed into her pillow, "Oh God,
how can I tell you what I came here to tell you?"
"What's wrong Penny?"
I remember she spent some minutes getting control of
herself before she began to talk. I sensed that I was
not going to like what she had to say. Little did I
know that her next words would deliver me more pain
than I had ever felt before.
"Bobby let me get all the way through what I have to
say before you say anything. Will you promise me that?"
I reluctantly agreed and waited for her to begin.
"I-I... love you more than anyone else on this earth,
you must believe that. Until this moment there has been
no other man in my life but you. I wish we could have a
life together but the way things stand now we can't. I
want children and we could never have children of our
own.
"Mom and Dad would be devastated if they knew about us
and how would they feel if we moved away and lived
openly together? If this world would let us live an
open life and if nature would give us decent odds for
normal children I would agree to live with you in an
instant but you know this is not possible... I have met
a man who has been very patient and wants to marry me.
I told him I had to clear up some unfinished business
here before I could give him an answer and he agreed to
wait until then.
"You and I can't have a normal life together but he and
I can. You'll find someone also. If you love me as much
as I love you I know you will have a place for me
always in your heart but I want you to have a normal
life too. You must find someone else to make a life
with; a respectable life with children."
Penny stopped talking and hugged me. I could feel her
naked body press against me and feel the wetness
between her legs of our recent lovemaking. I couldn't
stand to be close to her, I had to get away from her
touch and the reminder pressing wetly against me of
what we had meant to each other.
I sprang out of bed and ran to the shower. I
compulsively washed all traces of our lovemaking from
my body and when I finished I dressed in street
clothes. Penny was lying in the bed softly crying as I
let myself out of the apartment and walked the streets.
I walked for what seemed like hours. As I recalled her
little speech the each word hit me like a hammer blow.
We had been lovers for over ten years and in a few
seconds that world had come tumbling down. All those
years she had been more lover than sister but in an
instant the woman beside me, naked and wet with our
lovemaking, had become my sister.
I had been appalled with the enormity of what we had
done and yet I could not deny the love I felt for her
even now. She was my Penny and I loved her so much I
would do whatever she asked of me. I began to calm down
and start thinking rationally. I could see the truth in
her words even as a little voice in me cried out my
pain. I would have to go back to the apartment and give
her my blessing for her marriage.
When I walked in she was sitting on the sofa watching
TV. She looked at me expectantly and I could see she
feared what I was going to say. I chose to sit beside
her and I took her in my arms and held her close.
"Penny, I love you and I will always love you. Go to
your man and be happy and I will share your happiness
and we will share the pain of what might have been."
We sat for a long time just holding each other and
stared unseeingly at the TV. Eventually hunger got the
upper hand and we had a cold dinner out of the
refrigerator. Later I left her in the living room and
went to bed. I lay awake listening to her get ready for
bed and was surprised when she came into my room and
got in bed with me.
"What about your husband to be?" I asked.
"He'll wait. Let's just have the few days left to us
like old times."
I could hardly argue with her. We tried to pack a
lifetime of love into a few days.
I accepted my grant and continued at the university.
When I got a wedding announcement I sent a gift and my
apologies with my parents. I was not going to her
wedding and study gave me an acceptable excuse. Our
letters still traveled back and forth in the mail but
they were between a brother and his sister. It was hard
to write that kind of letter to Penny and many times I
had to tear up several pages for my emotions would
spill out in a torrent and spread across the paper.
I tried dating but it just didn't work out. I even
tried to make love to one woman but couldn't. I still
see her around campus but she doesn't speak to me
anymore. I have become accustomed to living alone.
In the spring of my first year of graduate study I got
a devastating telephone call. Mom and Dad had gone on
vacation to warmer climes and as they were returning
their plane had gone down. I called Penny and gave her
the news. We didn't get to finish the conversation for
she became so emotional she had to hang up. The next
morning she called and told me that she would be
arriving that afternoon and gave me her flight number.
She asked if she could stay with me while we made the
arrangements for their funeral.
It had been almost a year since I had seen her and I
waited anxiously at the airport for her arrival. A wan
Penny walked out of the flyway into the terminal. We
hugged briefly and exchanged a quick kiss reserved for
relatives and after a baggage drill were on our way to
the apartment.
When we arrived the old couple joined us for a few
minutes to offer their condolences. I had grown quite
fond of them in all the years I had lived there and I
think they looked on me as an adopted son. Many is the
time they have let me slide on the rent in my earlier
student days and I have eaten uncounted meals at their
table when I was short of cash. Now they are as close
as anyone I know outside of Penny.
When they left and we were alone Penny asked me for
details and I explained to her what I had learned. It
would be a week before the bodies would be shipped and
we could make funeral arrangements. We talked of old
memories and little anecdotes we remembered about our
parents. There was still a sense of unreality about the
whole thing. I expected at any moment to get a phone
call from the airport to come and pick them up.
I prepared a simple dinner and we ate in silence.
Afterward we watched TV until a news program mentioned
the crash and then we turned it off. Mostly we just
talked.
Late that evening I left Penny sitting in the living
room and went to bed. I could hear her stirring around
and finally go to bed in the other room. I lay awake
for a long time remembering the happy, loving times we
had had together in this little place. Finally I
dropped off to a troubled sleep and dreamed of other
nights in other times.
*
The next morning I awoke to the smells of breakfast
cooking and I joined Penny in the kitchen. As a reflex
I hugged her affectionately from behind with my
forearms across her breasts as I had thousands of times
before. It was only afterward that I realized that I
couldn't take liberties with her, she was a married
woman now. I quickly apologized and took a seat at the
table. She poured me a cup of coffee laughing at my
embarrassment and gave me a quick peck on my cheek.
"If you want the truth, that felt good," she said.
We ate and then decided to go out to the farm and see
if we could make heads or tails of our parents'
affairs. I made a couple of quick phone calls to get my
schedule in order and we set off. We talked about the
familiar scenery of this often repeated drive and joked
about earlier trips. Neither of us wanted to talk about
the real reason we were here together.
When we arrived at the farm we walked through the whole
house and looked at old sights so well remembered.
Finally we got the household files and sat at the
kitchen table and spread everything out and began to go
through things one at a time. In a couple of hours we
had a good picture of things that needed to be done and
what assets our parents had. We read the will and it
was very simple, Penny and I shared everything equally.
We had a simple dinner and watched some TV steering
clear of the newscasts. Penny called her husband later
that evening and I could hear her talking on the phone
but could not understand the words. From her tone of
voice I gathered that everything wasn't right between
them. When she returned to the living room I held my
peace not wanting to pry. She was upset but chose not
to talk about whatever was bothering her.
I slept in my old bedroom that night and Penny slept in
hers. Again I had a night of dreams but this time I
kept dreaming of Penny talking on the phone and getting
louder and louder as she shouted into the handset.
*
I woke up early and went downstairs to the kitchen and
made a pot of coffee. I found some pancake mix and
frozen sausage and began to fix breakfast. Penny came
up behind me and gave me a bear hug. I was acutely
aware of her soft body pressed against my back and felt
a little guilty when I found myself becoming aroused.
"That's to pay you back for yesterday morning," she
said.
After breakfast we sat at the table and had coffee
together. We reminisced about times we had spent in
this room in days past. When we finished our coffee
Penny asked me to go out to the barn with her. I
followed her to the little room in the loft. We were
both surprised to find it clean and dusted. Evidently
Mom had kept it clean after we had left home.
Penny sat on the bed and I sat on a chair as we talked
about the times we had spent there. Neither of us
mentioned anything about anything except the most
innocent of events. We seemed to have an unspoken
agreement to say nothing about our past love. Penny
seemed to have something bothering her and she appeared
about to tell me something so I held up my end of the
conversation. Patiently I waited until she was ready to
talk about whatever was on her mind.
After a few minutes she dropped a bombshell.
"Bobby, I'm thinking about divorcing my husband."
I asked the only question I could think of, "Why?"
"Things just aren't right between us. He is jealous of
me. He wants me to quit my job and stay home. He tries
to control every move I make. I asked him to come with
me to give me support while we made the arrangements
for our parent's funeral but he refused. He wanted me
to come here for a couple of days just for the funeral
and come straight back home.
"Last night he said that I should be home not out in
the boondocks going through my parents' things like a
scavenger. I told him that I would be staying here for
a while and would come home only when I was ready. He
became very angry and told me, no ordered me home after
the funeral.
"We haven't been married a year yet and I have had all
I can stand of my husband. I can take a leave of
absence from my job for a month or two and I might just
do that. I need some time to think about my marriage
and what I'm going to do. What do you think Bobby?"
"There's nothing I can say about your marriage but if
you want to stay here or with me in the city you're
welcome. I've missed you terribly."
"Thanks for the invitation and to be honest I've missed
you too."
Penny began to leak tears down both cheeks and I went
over to comfort her. We ended up laying on the bed and
holding each other tightly. At some point our embrace
ceased to be a brother comforting his sister and became
charged with sexuality. My lips found hers and I could
taste the salt of her tears. Her mouth opened and we
kissed as lovers again; our tongues probing hungrily as
our bodies pressed close together.
I was filled with desire and I pressed into the
softness between her legs. Penny responded and opened
her thighs as she rolled on top of me and began to
grind her body against me. It had been so long since I
had been with a woman that I made a mess of my pants.
That broke the spell and I rolled Penny on her side and
pulled away.
"What's the matter?" she asked.
"I can't, you're married," I said in a lame voice.
"I'm your sister but that didn't bother you, incest was
OK but adultery isn't? Bobby how can you get moral on
me now? Remember the first time we made love in this
bed? Do you still love me like you did then?"
"Penny never a day has gone by that I haven't loved
you. I love you right now, at this moment, as much as I
ever have. I just love you so much I don't want to hurt
you or cause you pain."
"Kiss me Bobby," she commanded.
When our lips met I was lost. Somehow our clothes
disappeared and we melted into each other. This woman
would never get away from me again. The world could do
its worst but I would have Penny as mine from this day
forward.
"Penny don't ever leave me again, I couldn't stand it."
"Don't worry, I won't Bobby, just love me."
THE END
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This story was written as an adult fantasy. The author
does not condone the described behavior in real life.
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Kristen's collection - Directory 65