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Appalachian Spring
by Jim Fix (jimfix@earthlink.net)

***

A sweetly romantic and well written love story about a 
back woods youth and a city woman who is a professional 
photographer who is getting away from it all. She 
teaches him about photography and much more. (MF, rom)

***

The Appalachian Mountains stretch southwesterly from 
Canada to Alabama and I was lucky enough to spend my 
childhood on an isolated farm in one of the mountain 
valleys. The farm was bordered on three sides by 
mountain ridges covered with a hardwood forest. We 
farmed the valley floor and cut firewood from the trees 
that covered the steep slopes that surrounded us.

My Dad grew vegetables on part of the farm and Mom 
canned the excess for part of our winter provisions. 
Apple trees covered the lower reaches of the slopes and 
when they ripened we made sweet cider and sold it to a 
distributor who in turn sold it to the roadside stands 
that catered to tourists. The rest of the farm was 
devoted to corn which made up our main cash crop. The 
local farmers had made whiskey for over a hundred years 
in these mountains and it was considered an honorable 
profession, Federal Law notwithstanding.

The corn was pretty much worthless as a cash crop but 
when turned into sour mash whiskey it became a valuable 
commodity. Some folks made "sugar whiskey" which was 
nothing more than sugar water with some cracked corn 
and corn meal added to give it flavor. The whiskey was 
raw and inferior to real sour mash. Sugar whiskey also 
exposed the maker to the scrutiny of "The Law". It 
takes hundreds of pounds of sugar to make a run and The 
Law kept their eyes open for sugar sales like that.

My Dad made real sour mash whiskey which required 
sprouting of part of the corn to make the malt. The 
sprouted corn was dried and then ground very fine. When 
added to the mash it turned the cornstarch to sugar 
which fermented into alcohol. Only a small quantity of 
sugar was needed to start a run which was easily 
concealed in Mom's purchases to make jams and jellies 
when she started canning.

An old coal mine provided cover for Dad's still and 
furnished the fuel to cook off a run. Dad only cooked 
the mash or ran the still at night so his smoke 
couldn't be spotted and give him away. He sold the 
finished whiskey to the same man who bought our cider. 
Other Moonshiners got caught when they sold small 
quantities to individuals or through sugar purchases; 
the profits were higher but so were the risks. Dad sold 
in bulk to only one person and bought very little sugar 
so he was able to make a living with little risk.

Mom and I worked alongside Dad on the farm and I helped 
him with the still. I learned how to make whiskey from 
step one to step last by the time I was twelve. I had 
also learned to be close-mouthed about everything as a 
result of Dad's occupation.

One of my chores was to wander through the woods that 
surrounded our farm and look for signs of anyone spying 
on us. Moonshiners necessarily value their privacy and 
develop a streak of paranoia. It was on one of my long 
walks through the woods when my story really began.

Our county is sparsely settled and a stranger will set 
off a wave of gossip. Many of the local farmers 
supplement their income with moonshine and are just as 
secretive as my Dad. The County Sheriff is the only 
local law enforcement and he has to get voted into 
office every four years so he warns everyone if he 
hears the Feds are planning anything. For this service 
he is given little gifts now and again and can count on 
everyone's support during elections. He is a good 
Sheriff and enforces the law to the letter except the 
one that makes moonshine illegal.

A stranger who doesn't have friends or relatives in the 
local area is considered to be a Fed until proven 
otherwise. If you ever visit this part of the country 
and wonder why the people seem a little distant you 
have to consider how many of them make a living. Once a 
stranger is identified as just an ordinary person the 
local people will go out of their way to be friendly 
and helpful. I digress so let me get back to the story.

It was a beautiful spring Saturday and I was walking 
through the woods looking for signs of anyone who had 
been here before me. To a practiced eye a walk through 
the woods leaves a trail that is as easy to follow as a 
roadmap. I had followed the ridgeline on one side of 
our farm up to the main ridge which gives a view of the 
countryside for miles around. I loved the view from 
here and usually spent a little time sitting on a big 
flat rock resting after the climb.

I noticed something bright yellow laying in the fallen 
leaves nearby and when I picked it up I discovered it 
was the end flap from a film box. The view was 
instantly forgotten and I wondered why anyone would be 
taking pictures up here. The Feds came to mind in a 
flash. 

We had just finished planting our corn; were they 
taking pictures of our fields to show how much we had 
planted? They kept tabs on sugar sales; were they 
keeping tabs on how much corn was planted? If so Dad 
would have to find a new line of work for it was 
impossible to hide acres of corn fields.

I walked the main ridge in one direction for about a 
hundred feet looking for signs of anyone passing. There 
was nothing to be seen so no one had passed this way 
since the last rain. The yellow flap hadn't been in the 
rain so whoever dropped it must have come and gone the 
other way. I made my way back to where I had started 
and carefully studied the ground in the other 
direction. I found a scuff mark in the dirt almost 
immediately and a few feet further a tiny stone had 
been moved out of place. Whoever had been walking here 
hadn't tried to hide their tracks.

I followed the trail and about a hundred yards down the 
main ridge the trail led down the mountain on the side 
away from our farm. Whoever this was they were 
following a footpath that led to a cabin in the valley 
below. I could walk at a normal pace the trail was so 
clearly marked. As I got lower on the mountain I 
discovered a footprint in damp spot formed from seepage 
out of the mountainside. The print was small; either a 
kid or a woman had made it. To my relief, that probably 
eliminated the Feds but only deepened the mystery.

There was a cabin at the upper end of this valley that 
belonged to the son of the farmer who lived at the 
lower end of the valley. The son had moved away but 
sometimes came home and spent some time in the cabin. 
Perhaps that explained the footprint; he had a wife if 
I remembered correctly.

Just before I broke cover at the cabin I slowed down 
and quietly walked to the edge of the woods and 
observed the cabin from a rhododendron thicket. There 
was a station wagon parked outside that had out of 
state license plates. The door of the cabin was open 
and a woman was doing something at a stand of 
wildflowers. As I watched her I saw she had a camera on 
a tripod aimed at the flowers. That explained the piece 
of film box in my pocket but who was this woman?

The easiest way to find out was walk out of the woods 
as if I were hiking and let things develop from there. 
I quietly eased out of the thicket back to the trail 
and noisily walked out of the woods; I was halfway 
across the clearing before she noticed me.

I waved at her, "Hi, how are you?" I could see concern 
and perhaps a little fear in her expression.

She replied with a tentative, "Hello."

"I was out hiking and I noticed the trail had been used 
that comes down the mountain to this cabin. I thought 
my friend was back from the city."

"You know Bill?" she asked.

"Yes, I live on the farm across the ridge." I could see 
she was relieved when her expression relaxed.

"Oh, you must be the Carpenter boy then," she said with 
a smile.

"Yes, I'm Joe."

"Pleased to meet you Joe, I'm Wanda a friend of Bill 
and his wife. You must be thirsty after hiking in the 
woods. Would you like something cold to drink?"

"Yes Ma'am, if it's not too much trouble."

"No trouble at all; I was just about ready to take a 
break anyway.

Have a seat on the porch and I'll get us something, 
iced tea OK?"

I took a seat and listened as she bustled around in the 
kitchen. In a moment or two she returned with two tall 
sweating glasses of tea.

"I don't have any lemon so we'll have to have our tea 
straight with sugar," she apologized.

"Thanks, I like mine without lemon anyway."

"I guess you are wondering why I'm here in Bill's cabin 
aren't you?" she asked.

"If you know Bill that explains it," I replied.

She laughed and said, "Bill told me that people around 
her minded their own business and you just proved it. I 
guess I came to the right place to have some privacy 
and to be alone."

"I didn't mean to bother you; I was just checking up on 
who was taking pictures on the ridge," I explained.

"How did you know someone was taking pictures from the 
top of the mountain?"

I pulled the piece of yellow cardboard from my pocket 
and handed it to her. "I found this on top of the ridge 
and I wanted to find out who had been up there. The 
trail led down here."

"I see," she said. She was silent for a moment as if 
she was considering how put what she wanted to say 
next. "Bill told me what went on in these mountains so 
I understand why you would be concerned when you found 
that piece of film box. You don't think he would let 
someone stay in his cabin that would cause trouble for 
his family and neighbors do you?"

"No, he wouldn't do that."

"Glad we got that out of the way. I needed a place to 
be alone and away from the city for a while. Bill 
offered this cabin to me for the summer. He said that I 
would be completely alone but he didn't mention 
anything about handsome young men walking out of the 
woods. I guess that is an added bonus," she said with a 
merry twinkle in her eyes.

I guess I must have turned red as a beet for when she 
looked at me she said, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to 
embarrass you; I only wanted to pay you a compliment. 
I'm glad you dropped by for I find that the solitude of 
these mountains can be terribly lonely. I've been 
talking to the trees for the past two days."

We both laughed at her joke and I said, "I know what 
you mean; I sometimes talk to myself when I am alone in 
the woods."

"We have something in common; do you answer yourself?" 
We both laughed at that.

"Would you like to see the pictures I took from the top 
of the mountain?" Wanda asked.

"Yes Ma'am."

"My name is Wanda; I like your manners but somehow 
Ma'am seems too formal. I'll call you Joe if you'll 
call me Wanda. Is that a deal?"

"Yes... err... Wanda," I replied in embarrassment for I 
wasn't used to calling strange adults by their first 
name.

She went inside and soon returned with a stack of 
pictures which she spread out on the table. She pulled 
her chair over beside mine and began to show me the 
pictures as she explained them. All the prints were 
black and white and about a dozen of them were shot 
from the top of the mountain. She was a good 
photographer; the pictures seemed to catch the mood of 
the countryside. Big puffy clouds floated over the 
wooded mountains and a stream looked like a silver 
ribbon in the valley. She had captured the view from 
the top of the ridge.

"This is my favorite view. Even in black and white you 
have made it look so natural," I said praising the 
photo.

"Thanks for the compliment. I caught the light just 
right and it gives texture to the trees. A yellow 
filter brings out the clouds. Later I'm going to do the 
same picture in color."

We went through all the pictures and she described each 
one and how she took it. From her work I could see that 
she was a professional. After we had looked at all the 
pictures she gathered them up and took them back 
inside.

When she returned she asked, "Would you like to see how 
I make a picture?"

I said I would and she led me to where she had been 
bent over the wildflowers when I first saw her. She had 
a large umbrella shading the camera and the camera 
pointing toward a cluster of blossoms; she showed me 
what the picture would look like in the ground glass in 
the camera back. The camera looked like an old 
fashioned model where the photographer peered in the 
back while under a black cloth. She explained that this 
was a large format view camera and was as modern as a 
Polaroid. She switched the glass for a film pack and 
took a picture.

I helped her move the camera and the other things to 
the house. She showed me around the extra bedroom that 
was to become her darkroom and said that soon she would 
be able to work there during the day. She hadn't had 
time to set up everything and plug all the light leaks 
just yet. She was proud of her equipment and explained 
everything to me in detail.

When she had shown me everything she got us two more 
glasses of iced tea and we sat on the porch in the 
afternoon breeze. I listened as she talked about 
photography and some of the pictures she hoped to make 
this summer. 

The sun was sinking lower in the sky and it was time 
for me to get home. When I told Wanda I had to go she 
asked me to wait a moment and disappeared in the house. 
When she came back she had the picture of my favorite 
place in a cardboard frame. She put it in an envelope 
and handed it to me.

"Now you can see your favorite view without having to 
climb the mountain," she said.

"Thanks, I'll hang it on my wall."

"Come visit me anytime, I enjoyed having you to talk to 
this afternoon. If you're interested perhaps I can show 
you a little something about photography."

"I'd like that but I have school during the week. I 
could visit some on the weekends," I replied.

"If you're free come back tomorrow; come early and we 
can have lunch together. I'd enjoy having someone for 
company."

"I'll have to tell my folks. If they don't have 
anything planned I'll come in the morning," I replied.

"Fine, I was planning to work on my darkroom tomorrow 
so I'll be here all day."

We said our good-byes and I started walking back home. 
In a minute or two I was out of sight of the cabin and 
walking up the trail to the top of the mountain. I had 
really enjoyed my visit with Wanda and I hoped my 
parents hadn't included me in their plans tomorrow.

I hadn't been interested in photography before but 
after seeing what Wanda had done and all the equipment 
she had in the cabin my curiosity was pricked. As I 
thought about it I liked Wanda too; she was easy to 
talk with and she paid attention to what I said. When 
school was out I had few friends I could visit and 
summers were pretty much spent alone. I enjoyed 
tramping over the hills and working the farm but I 
didn't have anyone to talk to except Mom and Dad. It 
would be nice to have someone else to keep me company, 
especially a woman from a city far away.

I'd have to tell Dad what I had learned about her so he 
wouldn't worry about the new resident in Bill's cabin. 
Actually, having someone living there would give us 
another pair of eyes in a blind spot.

When I got home Mom was getting ready to put dinner on 
the table and Dad had just returned from town. I showed 
them the picture and told about my visit with Wanda. 
Dad said that Bill's father had told him that someone 
was living in Bill's cabin. Dad praised me for finding 
the film box and drawing the right conclusions. "It 
only takes one slip and the Feds will get you," he 
said.

We ate dinner and talked about the day's events. I 
think it was more like my parents listened to me 
describe my afternoon for my day had been far more 
exciting than theirs. When I mentioned that I was going 
to visit Wanda tomorrow and have lunch with her Dad 
teased me about having an older girlfriend.

"Listen to him Mother; he's having lunch dates with 
women already!" Dad said and laughed at his own joke. I 
colored from collar to hairline.

"It won't be too long before he will be telling us he 
wants to marry someone," Mom replied.

"Aw Mom, Dad please; I'm just going to visit her and 
talk about photography. She said she would show me how 
to take pictures," I said hoping they would find 
another subject.

Dad laughed at my reply and said, "Is Wanda pretty?"

As I searched for an answer to his question I realized 
I couldn't remember what she looked like. She hadn't 
worn any makeup and her hair had been wind blown. If I 
recalled correctly she had been wearing jeans and a 
man's shirt. "She looks about average I guess and she's 
younger than Mom," I managed to say.

"She must be quite a talker to get you this excited if 
she's just average. You've bent at our ears about her 
all through dinner," Dad observed.

"Leave the boy alone; he just met a stranger and that 
in itself is a lot of excitement in this neck of the 
woods," Mom said.

"Yeah, I guess so," Dad replied. "Joe how are you doing 
in school? Classes will be out pretty soon and I hope 
your grades are as good or better than last semester. 
You'll need good grades to get into college."

Glad to get on another subject I answered as truthfully 
as possible, "I might get a C in English but I should 
get A's and B's in everything else."

"Good, keep it up; one more year and you graduate."

Mom served dessert and the conversation drifted away 
from me. I thought about Dad's last question as I ate 
Mom's applesauce-cinnamon pie. My parents had demanded 
I put every effort into my education. Neither had 
finished high school and they wanted me to have the 
education they had missed. They hadn't driven me but 
they had instilled good study habits and gave me 
whatever I needed for school. I had to work at my 
studies but my grades reflected my efforts. Some people 
could read something once and it stuck in their mind; I 
had to go over the material time and again but 
eventually I absorbed it.

I helped Mom with the dishes and afterward Dad and I 
played checkers while Mom caught up on her mending as 
she listened to a radio drama;

TV was a few years away for our part of the world. When 
I grew sleepy I went to bed and slept soundly all 
night.

The next morning I did my chores and had breakfast with 
Mom and Dad. They planned to go visit friends for the 
day and drove off right after breakfast. I was at loose 
ends so I washed the dishes, closed up the house, and 
started walking to Wanda's. I tried not to hurry for I 
didn't want to get there too early.

The trail seemed to fly under my feet but from long 
habit little details of my surroundings registered just 
below the surface of my consciousness. At the top of 
the ridge I noticed I was running a little early so I 
sat on a flat rock and rested as I looked out over the 
countryside. Thinking about Wanda's pictures I wondered 
how she could capture so much in a black and white 
image.

I looked out over the valley and mentally compared her 
picture with the scene before me. She had captured the 
way I felt about it; it was a snug, secure place to 
call home. The picture invited you to look closer and 
study the details. The other pictures she had shown me 
also spoke to my emotions. One picture of a gnarled 
tree limb made me feel as if I was seeing a tree for 
the first time. The background was blurred but the limb 
was sharply focused and the texture of the rough bark 
seemed to jump out of the picture at you. The picture 
said, "I am a tree and you can see my strength."

How did she do that? I had taken pictures with our box 
camera but they looked like lifeless people staring 
back at you from the photograph. I wondered how one of 
her pictures of a person would look like? I'd bet my 
brogans that you would know something about the person 
by just looking at the picture.

I hadn't thought much about what I was going to do with 
the rest of my life but if I could take pictures like 
Wanda perhaps I could be a photographer. I had one more 
year of high school before I had to come to a decision 
but it wasn't too early to start thinking about what I 
was going to do with myself.

It was time to go down the mountain so I stood and took 
one last look at the valley before I trudged off. When 
I turned on the trail that led down the other side of 
the ridge I broke into a loose jointed trot that ate up 
the distance and was easier than walking downhill. In 
minutes I broke out of the woods at Wanda's cabin.

She was nowhere to be seen but the door to the cabin 
was open. I knocked and was rewarded with, "Is that you 
Joe?" from somewhere inside.

"Yes, it's me," I replied.

"Come on in; there's coffee on the stove. Help 
yourself; I'll be with you in a minute."

I poured myself a cup and sat at the kitchen table. As 
I sipped coffee I looked around the room. I had been 
inside the cabin when Bill had lived here and it had 
never looked this neat. I hadn't really paid attention 
yesterday when Wanda had shown me her darkroom but 
today I could see that she had really put some work 
into this place. There were curtains at the windows and 
a vase full of wild flowers added a splash of color to 
the room.

The floor had been scrubbed and waxed to a high shine. 
I guess you would call this the common room for it 
served as kitchen, dining room, and living room. There 
were two other rooms that were bedrooms and a tiny 
bathroom. Wanda had turned one of the bedrooms into her 
darkroom. I could hear noises from her bedroom and in a 
moment she opened the door and stepped out.

I wasn't prepared for the vision that stepped out into 
the room. I had seen pictures of women dressed like 
this but no one around these parts wore shorts and 
halter tops. I couldn't tell Dad what Wanda looked like 
yesterday and I didn't dare tell him what she looked 
like today! She wasn't pretty in the usual sense; she 
defined what a striking woman looked like. Her face was 
framed in dark brown hair and she had hazel eyes that 
looked right inside you.

I couldn't help letting my eyes stray from the top of 
her head to her feet and she was all woman with more 
bare skin exposed than her shorts and halter covered. 
She had curves in all the right places and a pair of 
long muscular legs that tapered to a pair of smooth 
ankles. As my eyes moved back up from the floor I 
noticed she had nice breasts and I could see the little 
valley that was between them. I sat speechless with my 
mouth hanging open like a fly trap.

"Put your eyeballs back in your head; I don't look that 
good," she said laughing at my astonishment.

"I'm sorry; I didn't mean to stare at you but I've 
never seen a pretty woman dressed like this before," I 
managed to stammer.

"Get used to me dressing this way for it gets hot in 
this cabin and I want to stay as cool as possible. 
Thanks for the compliment; I'm glad you think I'm 
pretty."

She got a cup of coffee and sat down across the table 
from me and that caused me another problem. When she 
leaned forward and put her elbows on the table I could 
see down the halter between her breasts. I tried very 
hard to look any place but there but my eyes kept 
straying back to the same place.

"Does the way I'm dressed embarrass you Joe?"

I thought very carefully about my answer to her 
question and I guessed the best answer was to tell the 
truth. "Yes and no. Yes, because I find it very hard 
not to look at you and no, because you can dress 
however you want in your house. I guess the problem is 
I've never seen anyone around here dressed in shorts 
before and it seems strange to me."

"A truthful gentleman; I've never met one before you. 
I'll tell you what, look all you want and pretty soon 
you'll get used to seeing me this way. I consider it 
high praise that you find me attractive; most women 
like to be admired and I'm no different than the rest." 
There was a twinkle in her eyes and a mischievous look 
on her face as she said, "Too bad I didn't meet someone 
like you when I was sixteen."

After her speech I found my embarrassment had subsided 
somewhat and I could look at her without trying to 
imagine what she looked like without the skimpy 
clothes. I was glad I was sitting down for I had become 
fully aroused when I first saw her. That would have 
been unbearably embarrassing to have her see the lump 
in my jeans.

She began to tell me about her plans for the darkroom 
and soon I was all ears taking in every word she said. 
I wanted to remember it all; didn't I come here today 
to learn about photography? As she talked I forgot 
about the way she was dressed and my blood pressure 
dropped at least fifty points. 

"Why don't you help me with the darkroom this morning 
while it's cool and we can see how much you understand 
about pictures this afternoon?"

"Sure, whatever you say."

When we finished our coffee she led the way and I 
followed her into the other bedroom that would become a 
darkroom. The first order of business was to install a 
light-proof fan in one of the windows for ventilation. 
All farm boys are introduced to hand tools at an early 
age and I was no exception. We had the fan installed in 
less than thirty minutes and when we plugged it in a 
cool breeze blew across the room. 

Next we tacked black rubberized cloth over the windows 
and when the light was turned out the room fell into 
darkness. Wanda carefully checked around each window 
and added tacks until no light at all could be seen. 
Satisfied with the windows we light proofed the door 
next. She tacked a rubber strip around the door frame 
and I tacked a rubber flap around the outside of the 
door. When the door was closed the room was plunged 
into stygian darkness.

"Wait a few minutes and let your eyes adjust. You'll be 
able to see little pinpoints of light coming through 
cracks in the walls and ceiling," she said.

She was right. It wasn't too long until I could see 
little star-like spots here and there. I could hear her 
moving around in the darkness.

"What are you doing?" I asked.

"I'm getting a can of putty and a spatula to fill in 
the little light leaks."

"How can you do that in the dark?"

"I'm used to working in the dark; I memorize where 
everything is located and I can move around without 
bumping into everything."

I could hear her move from one place to another and the 
little stars winked out one by one until I could see 
none at all. I heard Wanda put something on the floor 
and begin to walk toward me. Something soft and warm 
bumped into me and I tripped over my own feet and fell 
back against the wall. Wanda stumbled and fell against 
me. Instinctively I reached out and put my arms around 
her to steady us but the more we struggled to stay 
upright the more unbalanced we became. When it become 
inevitable that we fall I slid down the wall with Wanda 
clinging to me and we ended up in a tangled heap on the 
floor. As we struggled to get up in the darkness we 
managed to get even more tangled.

"Are you hurt?" she asked.

"No, I don't think so," I replied.

"Lay still and let me get up and turn on the light 
Joe."

I lay in the darkness with a soft woman on top of me. I 
could smell her perfume and feel her breathing against 
my cheek. For a moment she didn't move; then she 
carefully gathered herself together and slowly got to 
her feet. In the process I had soft breasts pressed 
against my face with the expected result. I hoped she 
hadn't noticed that I was aroused by our intimate 
contact.

The light came on and almost blinded me. Wanda came 
over and knelt beside me. "Are you sure you're OK?" she 
asked.

"Yeah, the only thing that got hurt was my pride. I 
shouldn't have been so clumsy."

Laughing she said, "You weren't clumsy; you just 
learned something about darkrooms. Without visual 
references it is hard to keep your balance when you 
trip over something. Let's take a break and get 
something to drink; I'm thirsty."

We went outside and sat on the porch with tall glasses 
of iced tea. A nice gentle breeze ruffled the leaves in 
the two big oak trees that shaded the cabin. Wanda sat 
on the floor and leaned against the railing. She didn't 
speak for a long time and I kept my peace and looked 
out at the woods on the hills around us. Occasionally I 
would steal a look at her and remember those two soft 
breasts pressed into my face. 

I was almost seventeen and it didn't take much to start 
fantasies coursing through my head. I had almost no 
experience with girls except one time long ago when I 
was about ten. I had played doctor with a little girl 
and we had done the show me yours routine. We had 
played at making babies and pressed together as if we 
were making love but when I had tried to push inside 
her she had pulled away and informed me that we were 
just playing at baby making.

"Are you hungry Joe?" Wanda asked.

"I guess so."

"You guess so; I'll bet you could eat a horse, shoes 
and all, if my knowledge of teenagers is correct."

"And pick my teeth with the horseshoe nails," I replied 
with a laugh.

"You do have a sense of humor; I like that. Let's go 
inside and I'll rustle us up some lunch. Will a cold 
lunch be OK? Afterward we can start your lessons."

"Sounds good to me," I replied.

While I sat at the table she removed bowls and plates 
from the refrigerator and placed them on the table. In 
a moment she joined me and began serving herself. "Help 
yourself," she said.

Almost everything on the table was strange to me but I 
watched her and followed her lead. I managed to get 
through the lunch without making too many mistakes. 

As we ate she talked about photography and how to "see" 
a picture. She would demonstrate her points by 
arranging things on the table. One way they looked 
ordinary but move one item to a new position and 
everything changed. A cup and saucer with a teaspoon is 
altogether ordinary but when placed just right with 
light and shadow just so these common objects take on a 
harmony and balance that pleases the eye.

After lunch Wanda cleared the table and got out several 
books of photographs and leafed through them with me. 
She would comment on each picture and its composition. 
When I asked her about shutter speeds and f-stops that 
were printed below each picture and she explained that 
if you couldn't see a good picture all the technical 
knowledge wouldn't help you make better pictures. First 
you had to train you eyes to see an interesting 
picture; then you tried to capture it with the camera's 
limited ability to see. It made sense to me.

When she turned to a full page picture of a nude woman 
with her back turned to the camera I flushed bright 
red. Wanda laughed and said, "Do you like pictures of 
nudes?"

Flustered and embarrassed I managed to say, "Yes but I 
never saw one in a book like this before."

"Perhaps one day I'll show you some more when you are 
ready to see them. Nude studies are an art form and 
when posed right are beautiful. You have probably seen 
pornographic pictures that circulate among boys your 
age. Am I right?"

I remembered a deck of cards one boy had that had 
pictures of nude women on them and how we boys had 
talked about them. Now I was with a grown woman and she 
was discussing nude pictures as if it was the most 
ordinary thing in the world. The silence grew long and 
embarrassing so I just blurted out, "One of the guys 
had a deck of cards..."

"I've seen those and the photography is lousy. Try to 
remember the pictures on the cards and compare them to 
the picture here. Can you tell me what's different?"

"I-I... don't know," I stammered, growing more 
embarrassed by the second.

"I'll answer the question and save you the 
embarrassment. The pictures on the cards showed pussies 
and tits on women in uncomfortable and unnatural 
positions. They appealed to your prurient interests. On 
the other hand, this picture shows a woman's body as 
soft curves and beautifully textured skin. She looks 
like what she is, a beautiful and appealing woman. Am I 
right?"

"I can see the difference; yes, you're right." Had I 
heard her right?

Had she really said pussies and tits?

"At your age any picture of a nude would make you 
horny, artistic or not," Wanda observed smiling. She 
gave me a friendly one-armed hug and said, "Enough for 
one day; lets go outside on the porch and relax. Like a 
soda?"

I nodded yes and she went to the fridge and got two 
bottles and opened them. I stood up as she handed me a 
soda. The picture and the discussion had aroused me and 
my condition was obvious. When Wanda noticed she smiled 
and led the way outside.

I sat in a chair and Wanda sat on the floor at the 
steps. "I guess sex is a forbidden subject in these 
parts," she said.

How did I talk to her about a subject which I knew 
almost nothing about? I had never talked to a woman 
about sex and my conversations with the guys was 
typical teenage chatter and bluster. I answered with 
the first thing that came to mind, "The boys talk about 
it among themselves and I guess the girls do too but 
girls and boys never talk about it together."

"I didn't mean to put you in an embarrassing position 
but how can we discuss certain aspects of photography 
if you and I can't talk frankly to each other about 
certain subjects?"

"I guess I have to learn about a lot of things besides 
photography."

"It won't be all bad; I promise," she said with a grin.

We sat quietly after that and enjoyed the peaceful late 
afternoon. Now and again I would catch her studying me 
when she thought I wasn't watching. Occasionally I 
would steal a glance at her. She had one foot on the 
steps and the other on the floor. Her legs were spread 
apart and I could see a flash of white panty up one leg 
of her shorts. My imagination filled in what my eyes 
couldn't see.

"Do you think you would really like to learn 
photography?" she asked.

"Yes, after seeing your pictures and the pictures in 
the books today I think I would."

"It looks like I'll be here for the whole summer so I 
will have lots of time on my hands with nothing to do. 
I'll be honest with you; I've enjoyed your company 
yesterday and today. If you want to learn I'll try to 
teach you all I can while I'm here. You can repay the 
favor by helping me out around this place and keeping 
me company. If you can put up with a lonely woman I'll 
try to teach you all I know."

"You've got a deal if I can do a little work around 
here to pay you back," I replied.

"Just having a friend to talk to will be enough but I 
won't turn down a little work around the place now and 
again."

"I guess you have an apprentice."

"How about an a friend and an apprentice Joe?"

"I've never had a woman friend before; you'll have to 
teach me that too."

"First the photography and we'll see what happens 
later," she said as she got up and went inside. I could 
hear her rummaging around as if looking for something 
and in a few minutes she returned with a camera, a 
book, and a worn camera bag in her hands.

"I'm going to loan you this camera and book. I want you 
to take some pictures during the week and try to 
remember what we talked about today as you compose the 
pictures. Read the book; it will help you with the 
basics."

She showed me how to load and operate the simple camera 
and had me sit beside her on the steps as she pointed 
out things in the book that I would need to read before 
I began to take pictures.

We were sitting so close that I could feel warmth 
radiate from her body. As she pointed to things in the 
book she would brush against me. It was innocent enough 
but my attitude had changed since this morning. I was 
aware of Wanda as a desirable woman and I realized I 
wanted to be much more than just her friend. 

The picture of the nude and Wanda's conversation 
afterward seemed to have a double meaning. Perhaps it 
was just an overactive imagination fueled by the 
eroticism of the picture in the book and her choice of 
clothes but hope had awakened that she could want 
something else.

It was getting close to sundown and I didn't want to be 
on the mountain after dark with no light. "It's getting 
late; I'll have to be getting home before it gets 
dark," I said.

"I know; can you come back next weekend? We can develop 
any pictures you've taken Saturday and make prints on 
Sunday."

"I'll come over as soon as I finish my chores and Dad 
lets me go."

To my surprise when I stood up to leave she gave me a 
quick hug and a little peck on the cheek. "See you 
Saturday."

I walked across the yard to the beginning of the trail 
and when I looked back she was still standing on the 
porch. I waved goodbye and she returned my wave. A few 
more steps and the woods swallowed me and cut the cabin 
off from view.

As I walked along I fumbled through the bag to see what 
it contained. There was the camera, a couple of extra 
rolls of film, and the book. I examined the camera and 
tried the viewfinder. It was nothing unusual, just a 
simple point and shoot camera. I tried to remember all 
she had told me about composing a picture but my mind 
wandered to the photo of the nude and her frank 
discussion of the picture.

I had never met anyone like Wanda before. She could 
have been from another planet and not been more 
different than the people around here. How had Bill met 
her? He had joined the Army and when he finished his 
hitch he had taken a job in the city close to where he 
had been stationed. He had married a girl he had met 
while in the Army and perhaps that was where he had met 
Wanda.

One thing was certain; I liked her a lot. She was easy 
to talk to even if she talked about things that were 
uncomfortable for me. She was pretty in her own way. 
She wasn't pretty like the women in the movies but when 
taken all together she had an aura that made her 
beautiful in my eyes. "Pretty is as pretty does," my 
grandmother had said. What was wrong with me? I had 
only met her yesterday and here I was dissecting her 
bit by bit. One thing was true; she looked good in a 
halter and shorts.

That set off another train of thought. I thought about 
the little white patch of panties visible when she sat 
on the porch and what it concealed. Combine that with 
her soft breasts this morning when we had collided in 
the darkroom and her intimate nearness when we sat side 
by side on the porch and you had one highly aroused 
boy. Hadn't she kissed me when I left? The voice of 
reason spoke up and told me she was just being friendly 
but I could fantasize couldn't I?

I arrived home just before my parents drove up. Mom 
prepared a quick dinner while Dad and I discussed the 
camera and book Wanda had loaned me. He was happy that 
I had taken an interest in something. We had talked 
many times about what I was to do with myself after 
high school and I hadn't found anything that interested 
me as a profession. Dad didn't know anything about 
photography but he figured it was as good as anything 
else for a job if it got me off the farm. He didn't 
want me to follow in his footsteps if there was 
anything else I could do.

While we ate dinner Mom and Dad talked with me about 
Wanda and the proposed lessons. Dad suggested that I do 
my chores early then I could have all of Saturday and 
Sunday if it was OK with Wanda. Mom asked me to invite 
her over for dinner Sunday afternoon if she could get 
away.

During the week I read the book and shot some pictures. 
Wanda's instructions came back to me when I was working 
with the camera. At other times I fantasized about 
other things. By Friday evening I had two rolls of film 
exposed. Mom and Dad were tired of my chatter about the 
pictures I had taken. They were glad that I had so much 
enthusiasm about something but I had worn them out with 
my nearly constant commentary about pictures.

At dinner my ever practical Mom said, "Lets see what 
the pictures look like before you crow like a rooster." 
That shut me up.

The next morning I hurried through my chores and almost 
ran over the mountain to Wanda's. When I arrived she 
had just gotten up and was making coffee. She was 
dressed in a robe and her hair was still uncombed from 
sleeping. She asked me in and had me sit at the table 
while she poured us coffee. She wasn't terribly 
talkative until she was about halfway through a cup. I 
was embarrassed by my too early arrival.

"Intellectually I knew farm families got up early but I 
never realized how early until just now," she said 
laughing at my embarrassment.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to get here too early."

"It's nothing, you assumed that everyone in the world 
got out of bed with the chickens. You've probably done 
a half day's work already and I've just got out of bed. 
I guess I'll have to start getting up earlier. I look a 
mess."

"You look just fine," I said.

"One thing I don't have to teach you is manners. You 
already know not to agree with a woman when she says 
she looks like hell."

We drank coffee and discussed the pictures I had taken 
over the past week. I know my way around a kitchen so I 
made breakfast for her while she showered and dressed 
for the day. When she came out of her bedroom I had her 
breakfast on the table.

"I could get used to this very quickly," she said when 
she saw the plate.

When she sat down I poured a fresh cup of coffee and 
she dug in. After a few bites she said, "You are a good 
cook; in the future make sure you get here early enough 
to fix breakfast for me. I'm tired of eating my own 
cooking."

That seemed like the proper moment to bring up Mom's 
invitation. I was surprised when she accepted right 
away and seemed enthusiastic about meeting my parents.

"Want to take a quick ride into Mt. Wildwood? I have 
some packages to pick up and I want to make a phone 
call."

"That sounds like fun. I haven't been there for a long 
time," I replied.

"Good, tell you what; I'll buy us lunch since you made 
me such a nice breakfast. My equipment for color 
processing came in this week and I want to get it set 
up today."

In a few minutes we were on the road and we waved at 
Bill's father as we drove past his house. It was a 
twenty mile drive to Mt. Wildwood and I wondered why 
she had packages come there. There was a Post Office 
just a mile away.

Wanda chattered about the scenery as we sped down the 
highway and listening to her talk I saw the familiar 
sights through different eyes. She was always looking 
at things as if she was going to take a picture of 
them. I guessed that was the reason her pictures were 
good.

When we got to town she stopped by the Post Office and 
got her mail but there were no packages. Afterward we 
drove over to a little warehouse that I knew well. It 
belonged to the man who bought our cider and Dad's 
other products.

When we walked in he greeted me with his usual smile as 
if he wanted to sell me something, "Hi Joe, who's the 
pretty girlfriend?"

"This is Wanda; she's a friend of Bill and his wife."

"Pleased to meet you," he said shaking her hand, "I 
guess you must be the one Bill sent all those boxes 
to."

"Nice meeting you and that's right; I'm here to pick 
them up."

"I have them in back; I'll help Joe load them in your 
car."

"I'd appreciate that very much. Could you do me a favor 
and let me use your phone to make a collect call?"

"Sure, it's right in there on my desk make yourself at 
home," he replied.

Wanda went into his office and we went in back and 
loaded boxes on a hand truck. It was only the work of a 
few minutes to load everything in the station wagon. 
The back was full with the seat folded down. By the 
time we finished Wanda was through with her phone call. 
We made polite conversation for a few minutes and then 
left.

"Is there a camera store in this town?" Wanda asked.

"Yes, it's downtown on Main St. You can probably park 
right in front of it."

"Tell me how to get there," she said.

I gave directions and shortly we were parked a couple 
of doors away from the only camera store in town. Wanda 
and I went inside and she carried on a long 
conversation with the owner. The words were familiar 
but I didn't understand a thing they were talking 
about. After a few minutes the owner put a large pile 
of things on the counter and wrote down several things 
Wanda wanted but he didn't stock.

Afterward we looked at cameras. Wanda was interested in 
a couple of used cameras and the owner took them off 
the shelf for her to examine. She mentioned a 4X5 
format camera and the owner asked her to follow him in 
back. They were gone for a couple of minutes before 
they returned. I heard the tail end of their 
conversation as they walked back into the front of the 
store.

"I might be in the market for a camera like that in the 
near future if the price is right," she said.

"I still have to do some work on it but I can give you 
a firm price after I get it fixed. Right now I don't 
know what the parts will cost me."

"Keep me in mind when you get it fixed," she said.

I carried her bags out to the car and we drove off to 
get lunch. After lunch we drove back to the farm. She 
explained how I was to develop my film as we drove 
home. 

At the cabin I unloaded the boxes and carried them into 
the house. When I looked into the darkroom there were 
three long tables sitting in the room. One of them had 
equipment on it and the other two were empty. A laundry 
sink with two tubs was sitting along one wall and 
evidently had water piped to it. There had been only 
one table last Sunday and the sink was new. Wanda 
explained that she had everything put in over the past 
week.

She had me sit at the kitchen table and handed me a 
spool and a strip of exposed film. She demonstrated how 
I was to wind the film on the spool and watched as I 
did it once. She told me to practice doing that with my 
eyes closed for I would have to do it in total darkness 
when I developed my film. I practiced and Wanda 
unpacked boxes. Every now and again she would have me 
demonstrate how well I had learned to wind the film and 
offer a suggestion.

Finally I was able to pass her strict scrutiny and she 
took me in the darkroom and put two spools and my film 
in front of me on the table. Off to one side sat a 
stainless steel tank that I would put the loaded spools 
in when I finished. She had me close my eyes and touch 
each item so I would know where they were when the 
lights went out. She flipped the switch and plunged the 
room into total darkness. She walked over and stood at 
my side as I began to load the film. 

It didn't take me long to appreciate all the practice 
she had put me through. Doing a thing with your eyes 
closed and doing it in total darkness are two different 
things. It is more difficult by several orders of 
magnitude in darkness; you can't sneak a peek when 
things don't go right. After a few long minutes of 
fumbling I got the film wound on the spools and in the 
tank. When she turned on the lights I was blinded for a 
moment.

She showed me how to measure the developer and helped 
me time each solution until the film was developed. 
Afterward she put the tank in the laundry sink and let 
fresh water run over it. While the film washed I helped 
her put things on the tables and run extension cords 
overhead to the items that needed power. When we had 
everything in place she went over to the sink and 
turned the water off.

"Lets see if you got anything on film," she said.

She stripped one of the rolls of film off the spool and 
held it up to the light. I could see little rectangles 
with gray images in them but nothing looked very 
interesting to me. Wanda, on the other hand, seemed 
delighted with the negative and put clips on each end 
and hung it up to dry. She did the same with the other 
roll of film and gave me a big hug.

"Joe, you're a photographer now, congratulations."

I examined the strips of film and when I looked close I 
could see that I did have pictures. I grew excited for 
the first time and asked, "When can we make prints?"

"Tomorrow morning when the film dries. I think you have 
some good pictures there. Lets take a break and have a 
soda."

I sat on the top step of the porch and Wanda sat down 
beside me. "I missed you during the week," she said 
without preamble.

"I missed you too, I've never had a friend like you," I 
said surprising myself. I found the words were true and 
I had been able to say them without embarrassment.

We sat there side by side in companionable silence each 
wrapped up in our own thoughts. I had never been 
comfortable around any woman besides my mother before 
but Wanda was different. We had spent the day together 
and I could honestly say I had enjoyed every moment of 
it. The cider man had asked who my pretty girlfriend 
was? Too bad she wasn't. She couldn't be interested in 
me; I was too young. She had said she missed me though.

I noticed the sun was sinking low in the sky and it was 
time for me to leave. "I have to go now; it's getting 
late," I announced.

"I guess you'd better; that mountain could be dangerous 
in the dark.

Can I kiss the world's newest photographer goodbye?"

"Why not," I said as I stood to leave.

We embraced and after a clumsy fumble or two our lips 
met in a warm kiss. Wanda was soft and warm in my arms 
and I wanted to kiss her forever. In a moment she came 
up for air and said, "Will you cook breakfast for me 
tomorrow?"

"You bet," I said still holding her.

"That deserves another kiss," she said and proceeded to 
kiss me again.

When we broke the kiss she said, "You'd better let me 
go before I do something foolish," and slipped out of 
my arms.

"I'll see you in the morning," I said and reluctantly 
turned and walked away.

All the way home my mind was in a whirl. What had 
happened? One moment we were a boy and a grown woman 
and in an instant we were kissing as equals. I had 
never been kissed that way before by a woman and it 
left me shaken to the core. Did she really feel that 
way about me? Was it possible? What did she mean by 
doing something foolish? I had an idea but it was 
beyond my wildest imagination.

I got home just before dinner and sat in the kitchen 
and told Mom and Dad about my day as Mom finished 
cooking. I carefully left out the parts I didn't think 
they should hear. I was truly excited about the 
pictures and could hardly wait until tomorrow when we 
made prints.

Mom asked if Wanda was coming for dinner tomorrow and 
when I told her Wanda was looking forward to meeting 
them Mom and Dad began planning for a big dinner. They 
asked me how long would it take us to make prints I 
honestly didn't know but I figured sometime after 
lunch. Mom said she would have dinner late and we could 
drop by anytime in the afternoon.

I went to bed later in the evening and dreamed of 
Wanda. I awoke early and had coffee with my parents. I 
told them that I was going to fix breakfast at Wanda's 
and would eat there. Mom gave me a package of cured ham 
slices to take over for breakfast.

I left early and walked across the mountain. I arrived 
at the cabin about the same time I had the day before. 
Wanda surprised me and was already up and had coffee 
made. She was dressed in a pretty dress and looked like 
a page out of a magazine.

"You look like a million dollars," I said.

"Thanks, I thought you deserved better than a frumpy 
woman in a bathrobe."

"Mom sent some cured ham for breakfast. Ham and eggs 
sound good."

"Great, I can walk it off tomorrow."

I began to prepare breakfast and Wanda sat at the table 
and watched. When I put her plate in front of her she 
exclaimed, "That looks too good to eat."

As we ate Wanda commented on the food and said she had 
never had ham that tasted that good before. I explained 
that Dad had cured it by his own method. We discussed 
what we would do in the darkroom later and she 
explained step by step how to make prints.

After we finished eating we relaxed for a few minutes 
over coffee. Wanda talked about how lonely it was to 
stay here alone and how much she appreciated my keeping 
her company. In return I told her how my summers were 
lonely without the company of my classmates. As we 
talked a warm and intimate mood descended over us. 
Yesterday I had only thought about physical 
possibilities; today I added a new range of feelings 
for her. I had only known this woman for a week but 
when I looked at her I got warm fuzzy feelings.

Wanda began to pick up our breakfast things and I 
helped her wash the dishes. Dishwashing had always been 
a distasteful chore but helping Wanda made it a 
pleasure. It was only a matter of minutes to put the 
kitchen in order and we shared a towel as we dried out 
hands. When our hands touched I couldn't help taking 
her hands in mine.

There was a long moment as we just stood there holding 
hands looking at each other. I could see confusion in 
her eyes that mirrored what raged in my head. I didn't 
know what to do next but Wanda rescued the moment by 
saying, "I think we had better go make those prints." 
The moment passed and I followed her into the darkroom.

As we busied ourselves with film and paper the tension 
dissipated and we got on with the task at hand. She 
showed me how to make contact sheets and when they were 
finished we took a break. We sat on the porch as we had 
yesterday and studied the pictures. There were sixteen 
pictures and four showed promise. She pointed out my 
mistakes in the twelve rejects and gave me pointers on 
how to avoid the same mistakes in the future. Neither 
of us had forgotten the moment in the kitchen but had 
managed to ignore it by unspoken agreement.

Afterward we went back into the darkroom and made large 
prints of the four good pictures. One picture I had 
made of the rows of corn coming up in the field she 
liked very much. She made and 8X10 of it. She put the 
wet prints in the dryer and we had lunch. 

After lunch we gathered up the prints and contact 
sheets and drove off for my house. Wanda discussed the 
one picture of the cornfield and wanted me to show her 
how I had taken it. It was around two when we pulled up 
in the farmyard.

Mom and Dad came out to meet us and I could see they 
were taken with Wanda when I introduced her. We went 
inside and she showed them my pictures and explained 
what was good and what was bad in each of the pictures. 
She praised my first set of pictures and said that I 
showed promise. After looking at the pictures I led 
everyone out to the cornfield and showed them how I had 
made the one good picture.

Once back in the house everyone sat around and talked. 
Wanda was good at conversation and my parents warmed to 
her. Soon they were laughing and joking as if they had 
known each other for years. Dad disappeared for a few 
minutes and returned with a quart of his whiskey; this 
was going to be a party. Dad didn't set up drinks for 
just anyone.

Wanda sipped the moonshine cautiously as if she 
expected it to set her on fire. After the first sip she 
said, "That was good; it's as smooth as glass going 
down."

Compliment Dad on his whiskey and you have a friend for 
life. Compliment Mom on her cooking ditto. After a 
while the party moved into the kitchen as Mom prepared 
dinner. Wanda watched Mom and helped whenever Mom let 
her. Dad poured himself another drink and sat at the 
table with me.

"Joe, that is one nice woman there. You have picked a 
nice person for a friend."

"I like her a lot Dad."

"How old are you?" Dad asked with a merry twinkle in 
his eyes.

"Oh Dad don't tease me. She's too old for me."

"All I can see is she likes you a lot too. I won't tell 
you what to do; you're old enough to make your own 
decisions but I will say this you could do a hell of a 
lot worse." Dad slapped me on the shoulder in a 
friendly fashion and gave me a knowing wink.

I thought about what Dad had just said and it dawned on 
me that he had just accepted me as an adult. The drinks 
had loosened his tongue and he wasn't trying to edit 
his words for my benefit. He had in so many words told 
me that I was man enough to make my own decisions. Too 
bad Wanda didn't see things the same way.

After dinner we sat on the porch in the cool evening 
breeze and talked. After she had the kitchen cleaned up 
Mom had a drink also. Neither of my parents drink often 
but on special occasions even Mom will have a couple. I 
sneaked a pint of Dad's best a few years ago and it 
made me very sick. I've shied away from whiskey ever 
since.

After a while Wanda began telling about herself. She 
was the younger sister of Bill's wife. She had been a 
camera nut since she was a kid and had studied 
photography after she finished high school. After 
graduation she had gone to work for a studio and had 
done some freelance work. She was taking a break from 
the studio this summer and would do some work on 
special projects here. She wanted to do some artsy type 
stuff and the cabin gave her the solitude she needed. 
In fact there was too much solitude and she wanted to 
teach me to keep from getting too lonely. She told them 
what a big help I had been so far.

Both Mom and Dad liked the idea of me learning the art 
and told her that I could spend any free time I wanted 
taking lessons from her. The conversation got off on 
other subjects and Dad's whiskey flowed. Mom and Dad 
had been lonely also and welcomed Wanda's company.

Before we knew it the hour was late. When Wanda stood 
up she realized she had drunk too much to drive home. 
She asked if I could drive her home and bring her car 
back tomorrow after school. I could drop it off school 
if I wanted. Mom agreed and I helped her to the car. 
Dad got another quart of moonshine and gave it to Wanda 
for an eye opener in the morning and for special 
occasions.

I drove out of the farmyard with Mom and Dad waving 
goodbye to Wanda.

She sat on the other side of the car and just looked at 
me as I drove.

After we got on the main road she said, "I like your 
parents; they are nice people. Is that why you are so 
nice?"

"I hadn't thought about it," I replied.

"That's the problem; you're so damn nice I can't make 
up my mind about you."

I decided to let that go and not say anything. She had 
been drinking and tomorrow she might feel different 
about things. I had seen enough people drink to know it 
didn't do any good to pay heed to what they said.

Just as we turned off the main road she asked no one in 
general, "Why am I kidding myself?"

"What did you say?" I asked.

"Nothing, forget it," was the reply I got.

When we arrived at the cabin I helped her to the front 
porch. She threw her arms around me and gave me a big 
kiss. I held her close and she responded by snuggling 
closer in my arms. We kissed again and again. 

After a while she pulled away from me and said, "Can we 
talk about this tomorrow? I'm too drunk to know what I 
want to do right now."

"Only if you kiss me again," I replied.

"I can do that," she said and did.

She went into the cabin and I drove home. I felt as if 
she had crossed a bridge and we were on the other side 
together. I could wait until tomorrow.

After what seemed like the longest school day I had 
ever endured I was finally driving toward Wanda's 
cabin. I didn't know what awaited me there but I had 
made my mind up that we were going to get off this 
roller coaster. Whatever was decided today was going to 
be final. I might be young but I could make up my mind.

When I drove up to the cabin Wanda was sitting on the 
front porch waiting for me. I parked the car and walked 
over toward her. I half expected her to get up and give 
me a hug but she remained seated and greeted me in a 
distant manner. All I got was a, "Hi Joe, take a seat."

"Hi Wanda, how was your head this morning?"

"Not too bad, that stuff your Dad makes sneaks up on 
you but I didn't have too bad a hangover. I haven't had 
that much to drink for a long time."

With teenage directness I said, "You said last night we 
had to talk this afternoon."

She was silent for a few moments and seemed deep in 
thought. Finally she said, "I guess there's no better 
time than right now to talk this out. I was very drunk 
last night and I said and did some things I shouldn't 
have."

She was trying to deny that anything had happened 
between us. I had played every scenario I could imagine 
over and over in my mind today and this was one of 
them. She needed a push to get her out of this line of 
thought and I had a reply for her. "Were you drunk 
Saturday afternoon when you said you had missed me?"

"No, I wasn't drinking then but I shouldn't have said 
those things and I shouldn't have kissed you?"

"Why Wanda?"

"Why is always a terrible question to answer. Like it 
or not you are too young for me. If I were seventeen 
things would be different but I'm over 21 and that puts 
a different complexion on things."

"Would you feel any differently about me if I were 
eighteen?"

"No, I would feel the same."

"How do you feel about me?"

"Dammit, that's not the point!" she said with some 
heat.

"It's the whole point. You think I'm too young for you 
to have feelings for me and in your mind that's that. 
What about me? Have you considered my feelings? Yes, 
you're older than me but I can't help what I feel for 
you and I can't dismiss my feelings simply because of 
our differing ages. If you can than you must not feel 
what I do."

Wanda started to cry and sat slumped in her chair as 
big sobs rocked her body. My words had hurt her and I 
felt like the lowest form of life. I sat there in 
misery as she sobbed out her pain. I wanted to comfort 
her but didn't know what to do or say. What did the 
hero do in the movies? He took the woman in his arms 
and gave her a kiss.

I got up and pulled Wanda to her feet and planted a big 
kiss full on her lips. I held her close and felt her 
struggle to get away but her struggles weren't 
convincing and I continued to hold her. After a moment 
or two she relaxed and returned my kiss. When our lips 
parted she said, "Damn you Joe, I give up. I can't 
fight with you and myself at the same time."

Just before dark Wanda drove me home and came in to 
visit for a short while. She apologized to my parents 
for our late arrival but explained that she had needed 
some help and I had volunteered. My parents didn't seem 
to be concerned; they said they knew where I was and 
hadn't worried. After a few minutes conversation Wanda 
said she had to go and asked me if I would be over 
early Saturday. I told her I would.

After she left we sat around and talked about the 
dinner yesterday. Mom and Dad both were pleased that I 
had befriended Wanda. They both liked her and hoped she 
would visit more often. Living out on a farm in the 
boondocks is a lonely life at times and making a new 
friend is a big event. When they had exhausted the 
subject I excused myself and went to my room. I flopped 
on top of my bed and in my imagination relived the 
unbelievable events of the past few hours...

...I couldn't get enough of her kisses; a hunger for 
female affection had built up during my teenage years 
and now I was at the banquet table. Wanda responded 
with a hunger of her own that easily matched mine and 
we hugged and kissed for what seemed like an eternity.

No words were spoken after her initial surrender to her 
desires. She simply led me to her bedroom and began to 
undress me item by item from head to toe. As I sat on 
the edge of her bed she removed each piece of her 
clothing deliberately; giving my eyes time to drink in 
the details of each new area exposed before she removed 
the next piece of clothing. 

At long last she stood before me totally naked; the 
first real woman I had ever seen completely nude. I was 
beside myself with desire but there was a streak of 
fear I wouldn't be able to carry the rapidly unfolding 
events to a conclusion. Parts of me wanted to rush into 
unknown territory and other parts held back with fear 
of the unknown. 

This moment would never happen again and Wanda extended 
it longer and longer giving me time to savor each 
nuance, sight, and sensation. When I could wait no 
longer she came to me and gently but firmly inducted me 
into the mysteries of love. I had crossed one of the 
bridges that leads to manhood.

I was a stranger to the uncontrollable hunger that 
swept over me but Wanda patiently introduced me to the 
banquet that would satisfy my newfound needs. I entered 
a world of physical sensations each more overwhelming 
than the one before, cumulating in an overpowering 
release. I recalled the warm touch and texture of her 
skin. Her delicate perfume was subverted by the 
powerful musk of a fully aroused woman. 

I recalled the faint salty taste of sweat as I kissed 
her wherever my lips could find flesh like a starving 
man at a feast, driving me to unknown heights of 
desire. The tactile sensations are almost impossible to 
describe; warm silky skin, soft pliant orbs of flesh 
under my hands and the incredibly hot, wet, slippery 
flesh of secret places at last discovered...

**

All week, as I impatiently waited for Saturday morning 
to roll around, I had flashbacks to the incredible 
events of Monday afternoon. At the most inopportune 
moment a vision of Wanda lying on the bed would float 
in front of my eyes. In English class the teacher, who 
carried the nickname of Miss Prune, would flicker in 
and out with an image of Wanda standing naked in her 
bedroom. I saw Wanda in her shorts and halter, in her 
bathrobe, and laying in my arms smiling up at me with a 
tender look on her face. 

My body sat in the classroom that last week but my mind 
was in a little cabin in a valley nearby. Fortunately, 
everyone was excited during this last week of school so 
my distraction went unnoticed. Final exams had been 
last week or I would have posted failing grades across 
the board.

Friday was a short day with an assembly first to hand 
out awards; afterward we reported to our homerooms to 
pick up our report cards and at last we were free. I 
quickly scanned my grades and Miss Prune had been a 
dear and had given me a B in English. I was free for 
the summer.

Mom and Dad had gone to town to do some shopping so I 
had no reason to hurry home. On a whim I caught the 
school bus that went past Wanda's valley and walked to 
her cabin. When I knocked on her door she yelled from 
the darkroom for me to get something to drink and wait 
she'd be out as soon as she could safely open the door.

I sipped a soda and leafed through a photography 
magazine while I waited for her to finish whatever she 
was doing in the darkroom. I could hear her making 
noises as she worked but she didn't say anything to me 
so I kept my mouth shut and read.

After about a half-hour she opened the door and walked 
over to me and gave me a big hug as I sat at the table. 
She flopped down in my lap and took a sip of my soda 
before she kissed me hello. After soundly kissing me 
she got up and took the chair adjacent to mine.

"How'd school go this week?" she asked.

"It's a good thing I got finals over last week for all 
I could do was think of you."

"How were your grades?"

I handed her my report card and she studied it for a 
moment and handed it back. "I guess grades like those 
deserve a little celebration. Do you have any ideas for 
a proper reward?" Wanda said with a wink and smile as 
she struck a sexy pose.

I had one but I was too shy to mention it. I guess I 
must have turned red with embarrassment for Wanda 
started laughing and said, "My, my, I can't believe you 
are as shy as all that," in a teasing tone of voice.

She got up and moved to my lap sitting astride my legs 
and faced me. After a quick kiss she said, "You don't 
have to be shy around me. You can touch me, kiss me, 
pat me on the bottom, or do whatever affectionate thing 
that crosses your mind when we're alone. I like to get 
little love pats and kisses for no reason other than 
you just want to show affection. Do you know that it's 
been almost four days since your last visit and I've 
missed you every one of them?"

Later we lay in the ruins of her bed and let a fan blow 
cool air over us. Love is sweaty work on a late May 
afternoon. "Joe, you never had a girlfriend did you?" 
Wanda asked out of nowhere.

"No, not before you."

"We're lovers and that is different. Being someone's 
girlfriend implies that the two people involved are 
committed to each other. Lovers on the other hand enjoy 
each other's company but either can walk away from the 
relationship with no strings attached. We're lovers not 
boyfriend and girlfriend. Do you understand what I've 
just said?"

"No, I don't. How can we be together like this and not 
be committed to each other?"

"Did you enjoy the past few minutes Joe?"

"Yes but what did that have to do with commitment?"

"Everything, I invited you to share my bed with me for 
the simple reason I wanted to share a little pleasure 
with you. I like you a lot or we wouldn't be here like 
this but that doesn't mean we are committed to spending 
the rest of our lives together. I guess in these parts 
when a man and a woman have sex it means some kind of 
commitment and usually the man is dominant. Joe, I'm 
not that kind of woman. I don't want a man running my 
life; I'm capable of taking care of myself. I want and 
need a friend to share a tender moment with when the 
mood strikes; someone to share my ideas with but most 
of all I want a friend who respects me and doesn't want 
to control me. Can you be that person?"

"I guess I'll have to learn to be like that for I don't 
want to have you mad at me. I like you too much to have 
to stay apart."

"If I told you to leave right now Joe what would you 
miss the most, the sex or my company?"

"I would miss both. The sex would be what I missed most 
at first for I've never had a lover before but when I 
think about it I would miss being around you just as 
much."

"I don't believe it! An honest answer from a man!" 
Wanda exclaimed.

"Keep talking like that and you might have trouble 
getting rid of me. Joe don't ever tell me what you 
think I want to hear; tell me what you really think and 
we will get along just fine."

Later we sat on the porch and talked about a little bit 
of everything but mostly about what she had planned for 
us tomorrow. She wanted me to help her in the darkroom 
with some developing and later she would show me how to 
use a view camera. 

Almost as an after thought she asked, "Does your Mom 
and Dad like movies?"

"Yes, sometimes we go on Saturday nights."

"I have an idea," she said. "Ask them if they would 
like to go out to dinner with us and take in a movie 
afterward."

Soon it was time for me to go home and after a goodbye 
kiss I walked over the mountain to my house. Mom and 
Dad hadn't returned from town yet so I did my evening 
chores.

While I worked I thought about what Wanda had said this 
afternoon. She had turned my world upside down. I could 
see that I had a lot to learn about her and women in 
general. I had thought that our relationship had meant 
a lot more than she had described this afternoon. I had 
entertained thoughts of love in the romantic sense but 
she had put that to rest. 

In my mind I had always associated sex with love and 
marriage but she had added a new wrinkle; sex was 
something that special friends shared if the mood 
struck them. That clashed with the moral lessons I had 
learned. Girls were taught that sex was a dirty word 
while boys could be boys with no stigma attached. A 
girl who had sex before marriage was a slut but a boy 
was expected to sow his wild oats. As I thought about 
it this didn't seem fair but it was the way things 
were.

At dinner that night my report card was the main topic 
of discussion. My parents were happy with my grades for 
the year. I told them about stopping by Wanda's on my 
way home and the invitation she had extended for 
tomorrow night. In typical farm fashion Mom and Dad 
talked the subject to death, examining it from every 
angle, but in the end accepted readily enough.

After chores the next morning I walked over the 
mountain and found Wanda already working in the 
darkroom. She came out in a few minutes and gave me a 
hug in greeting. She poured coffee and we sat at the 
table as she explained what she wanted me to do today.

She had received a shipment of exposed film from the 
city and we would process it, make prints, and ship it 
back. She would do all the cut sheet film and I would 
develop all the roll film from the 35 mm and 127 
cameras.

We sat silent for a while and then she said, "Joe, I'm 
going to have to ask you to keep a secret; can you do 
that?"

"Sure, if you want me to."

"This is as big a secret as our being lovers. You can't 
even tell your parents what's on this film. You may 
even have to tell them a white lie or two if they ask 
you any questions; can you promise me that you can do 
that?"

"If you want me to keep whatever's on the film secret I 
will do it."

"Good, remember the picture cards you told me about the 
other day? These pictures are the same kind but much 
better quality. They are taken by photographers in the 
city and I develop and print them. Some will be used in 
magazines, some will be printed on postcards, and some 
will be sold as originals. I can promise you that you 
will enjoy looking at them," she said laughing.

"That's why you set up a darkroom way out here in the 
sticks."

"That's a reasonable conclusion. There's more but I'll 
tell you the whole story later, OK?"

When we went in the darkroom there was a cardboard box 
on one of the tables full of film. Wanda sorted the 
film into two piles and I set up a place to work. When 
we were both ready she turned out the lights and we 
began. As I rolled film on spools we chatted about the 
work at hand and photography in general. At first I 
found it strange to carry on a conversation in total 
darkness but after a while the strangeness wore off and 
the chatter back and forth made the work go easier. 

I filled all the available spools and tanks before 
Wanda finished with the cut sheet film so I just stood 
in place and waited for her to finish. In a few minutes 
she turned on the light and then we began to develop 
the film in the tanks. Everything was black and white 
today so we were soon done and put all the developed 
film in the sink to wash.

While the film washed we took a break on the porch and 
enjoyed the fresh air after the smells of the darkroom. 
"I'm going to have to get some more film tanks if we're 
going to process this much film at a time," Wanda 
observed.

"There sure is a lot of it," I replied.

"Many of the pictures will be test shots; perhaps half 
of them will be good enough to use. You will learn that 
many pictures are only useful for what the mistakes 
teach you. As you train your eyes to see pictures and 
learn the limitations of the camera you will shoot 
fewer wasted shots."

"It looks like today I'm going to practice in the 
darkroom with all the film we have to process," I said 
with a laugh.

"Wait until I teach you how to do color; that takes a 
long time and you'll think you are going to spend the 
rest of your life in there. Which reminds me, the film 
is done washing."

As I took the film off the spools and hung it up to dry 
I tried to make out what was on it but negatives are 
hard to figure out. I could see that there were people 
in various positions but couldn't make out any details. 
It should be interesting when we made prints.

We loaded another batch of film in the tanks and 
developed it. while it washed we had lunch and 
afterward went back to work. It grew hot in the closed 
room and Wanda suggested I take off my shirt. Bare to 
the waist it was cooler.

When she turned on the lights I noticed she wasn't 
wearing any top and was bare to the waist just like me. 
"Put your eyeballs back in your head," she joked, "I 
get hot and sweaty just like you."

After the last batch of film was developed and washing 
in the sink Wanda came over to my table and hugged me. 
Both of us were sweaty and where bare skin touched it 
felt slippery. She gave me a long kiss that tasted of 
our sweat and somehow this was more erotic than when 
she was powdered and perfumed. We had been working 
closely together all day long and the work had eclipsed 
any erotic impulse I may have had but in the few 
seconds we stood there in each other's arms my need for 
her came back with interest compounded for each and 
every moment we had spent together. 

The bedroom was miles away, too far and too long to be 
apart. There was an old daybed pushed into a corner of 
the darkroom and I picked her up and carried her there. 
We fell into a tangled heap on the bed and I fumbled 
with her shorts and panties as she undid my jeans. 

There was nothing quiet or gentle about the fire that 
had been kindled between us. All that mattered were our 
two mouths searching for each other with a hunger for 
the other's lips. Our tongues were embattled in a kiss 
and passion drove two bodies hurriedly together with 
ever increasing violence that cumulated with Wanda's 
animal moan in my ear.

"Where did that come from?" she asked a few moments 
later as we lay in a sweaty heap on the little bed.

"I don't know but I hope there's more in the future," I 
answered.

"I was going to put this bed in the attic but I think 
I'll leave it here if you are going to get this 
passionate smelling chemicals; I don't want to get 
splinters in my butt from the floor."

"I'd pick them out," I said.

Wanda laughed at my little joke and said, "There's 
other things I'd rather have you do."

"Such as?" I asked.

"You'll find out."

Before I could reply a timer bell chimed and Wanda 
pushed me off and walked to the sink to get the film 
out of the water bath. "Get up lazybones and give me a 
hand," she ordered.

It was only a few minutes work to hang the last of the 
film to dry but working with a naked woman in the room 
was distracting to say the least. A woman jiggles when 
she moves and jiggles in the most provocative places. 
In my nakedness I couldn't hide my condition and Wanda 
laughed at my discomfiture.

"Lets take a shower and go to my bedroom where we can 
do tender things and enjoy each other."

Later we lay together completely satisfied. "There's a 
thing to be said about slow and tender but it's much 
nicer if it follows quick and violent," Wanda said.

"It's all incredible," I replied.

"Incredible is a big word; when did you start using 
it?"

"Just now; it fits. Love is incredible, sex is 
incredible, and you're incredible Wanda."

"The last time anyone used incredible to describe me 
they called me an incredible bitch. If I remember 
correctly I slapped the guy but you deserve something a 
little different," she said and gave me a warm sloppy 
kiss. "Lets get dressed and take your parents to 
dinner."

I went to the darkroom and gathered up my scattered 
clothes. I was dressed in a moment. Wanda was putting 
on makeup so I went out on the porch and waited for 
her. After what seemed like an hour she stepped out and 
looking at her made the wait worthwhile. Her short hair 
was brushed out in a pageboy style and shined like a 
new penny. 

She had spent a lot of time with her makeup but the 
effect she had achieved was phenomenal; you couldn't 
see the makeup and she looked beautiful. She had on a 
simple dress that didn't call attention to her body but 
the overall effect said real woman; she would stand out 
in any crowd. She looked like a million dollars.

"Wanda, you're beautiful," I managed to say when I got 
over the shock of seeing her like this.

"You are full of compliments today; you could be habit 
forming."

As we drove around the mountain to my farm I studied 
Wanda from the far side of the car. I couldn't believe 
that this beautiful woman had only minutes ago had been 
making love with me. There was no way I had been locked 
in a lover's embrace with the vision that was driving 
the car. She looked like someone you saw in a magazine, 
remote and unapproachable. 

"Is something the matter? Is my makeup smeared or 
something?"

"No, I was just wondering what a beautiful woman like 
you saw in me?"

"Have you looked in a mirror lately? You are a handsome 
young man and if I may say so I feel lucky to have you 
for a friend."

I couldn't think of a reasonable reply to her last 
statement so I kept silent for the rest of the drive. 
When we pulled up in the farmyard Mom and Dad came out 
to meet us. Everyone was dressed in their Sunday best 
so I dashed into the house to change. When I came out 
of my room and into the kitchen the three of them were 
laughing and joking like the friends they were.

As we drove into town Wanda said, "Joe, I told your Mom 
and Dad about the contract I had with the magazine. 
Would you like to help me with the darkroom work?"

Clever, she had a magazine contract; I'd best go along 
with her story and find out where she was leading. 
"Sure, I'll be able to learn more about film processing 
and such."

"You can't believe how much Joe has learned in the 
short time I've known him. Today he developed at least 
forty rolls of film and I have to make prints next week 
and get them mailed back to meet the contract. I can 
teach Joe how to print tomorrow and he will be a big 
help to me. That is if you don't have any objections to 
him spending his spare time working for me."

"Wanda, after he does his morning chores he can help as 
much as you want. Right now the farm doesn't need a lot 
of attention and I can handle it easy enough. When I 
need him I'll let you know. Keep him busy so he will 
stay out of trouble."

We drove up to the nicest restaurant in town and Wanda 
led us inside.

This place was run by a family and served good food in 
large portions. The restaurant was nothing special just 
a big room full of tables covered with red and white 
checkered tablecloths. There were old tintype pictures 
hanging on the wall beside sprays of dried flowers. 
Here and there hung old fashioned kitchen implements 
scattered among the other things. 

Wanda was fascinated with the tintypes and asked the 
waitress about them. She said she didn't know where 
they had come from but the owner might. After we 
finished eating an older lady stopped by our table and 
invited Wanda to look at the pictures with her. When 
she returned she said that the pictures were family 
pictures and she was fascinated by old tintype and 
daguerreotype pictures. She carried on an animated 
explanation of the process as we finished our drinks. 

After the movie we stopped by a place that stayed open 
until midnight. It was the only nice place in town 
where you could get a beer or a family could go and get 
a sandwich after the movies. Many of the kids I knew 
from school stopped by here after the movies and had a 
soda. As usual there were several of my classmates 
sitting in a booth and saw us come in. They gave me a 
friendly wave and I waved back in greeting.

Wanda ordered three beers and a soda for me. We sat and 
talked about the movie, her imaginary contract, and 
farming. After a few minutes I excused myself and went 
to the bathroom. A couple of my classmates were already 
there and they asked me about Wanda. When I told them 
she was a family friend they all made silly faces and 
called me a lucky dog.

"Nah, it's not that way," I protested.

"Too bad," one of the guys said, "That's one good 
looking woman."

"Don't I know it," I said with a rueful look.

"Hell, you might get lucky," one said as they left the 
restroom.

When I returned to the booth I noticed the girls 
looking at us and talking among themselves. When one of 
the boys would look at Wanda the girl he was with would 
poke him in the ribs with an elbow to get his attention 
centered on her. Wanda noticed the action at the other 
booth and gave me a hidden wink and smile. When we left 
I helped her out of the booth and she took my arm 
possessively as we followed Mom and Dad outside. 

As we walked to her car she whispered to me, "That 
should give them something to talk about for a while."

The next morning Mom and Dad decided to go to a church 
social with a pot luck lunch and offered to drop me off 
at Wanda's. A ride was preferable to the long walk over 
the mountain so I accepted. My parents are not very 
religious but they do attend many of the social 
functions to keep in touch with old friends. 

When we drove up to the cabin and knocked on the door 
Wanda shouted, "Just a minute; be right with you," from 
somewhere inside.

When she let us in she was dressed in a blouse and 
slacks. I expected to see her in her usual shorts and 
halter. She invited us in and showed Mom and Dad around 
the darkroom. They were fascinated by all the equipment 
and surprised to find out that I would learn to use all 
of it. Afterward we sat at the kitchen table and had a 
quick coffee together before my parents had to leave. 
From their conversation I could see that they were 
suitably impressed. 

After they left Wanda changed back into her usual 
halter and shorts before she joined me at the table. 
"I'm glad it's quiet up here. I heard the car coming up 
the road and changed clothes; I don't think your 
parents are ready to see me dressed like this."

I laughed as I imagined the look on my folks' faces had 
they seen Wanda in a skimpy halter and shorts. "I think 
they would have been more shocked than I was that first 
day."

"Ready to make contact sheets Joe?"

"What do you want me to do?"

"Tell you what; I'll do exposures and you develop and 
when we get bored we can switch jobs."

Wanda assigned numbers to each roll of film and cut 
them into strips of five frames. She pencilled the 
film's number on the back of each sheet of paper and 
placed the film on top of a sheet of photographic paper 
in an easel and exposed it. The film went into a 
numbered envelope and I developed the contact sheet. I 
had the routine down pat after a few repetitions. 

First into the developer tray, then into the stop bath, 
next the fixing solution, and finally into a water wash 
to remove all the chemicals. I hardly had time to look 
at the tiny pictures on the large sheets; Wanda kept 
piling up exposed paper in the light safe beside me and 
I had to hurry to keep up with her. The darkroom was 
very dimly lit with a orange safe light which made the 
work easier than working with film which had to be 
handled in total darkness.

When we finished the 35 mm film Wanda called a break 
and we went out on the porch with coffee and relaxed. 
When she was working in the darkroom Wanda was single-
minded about what she was doing. Outside the darkroom 
she was relaxed and an entirely different person. 

"It must be lonely as an only child," she said out of 
nowhere.

"I couldn't say. I've always been alone," I replied.

"I guess that was stupid of me. How would you know 
anything different? I have an older brother and sister 
so I have always had someone around besides my parents. 
Perhaps not having siblings is what makes you seem 
older than your years to me."

"Is my age a problem?"

"Joe, there's one thing about you that keeps me on 
track; you go directly to the heart of a matter. To 
answer your question, your age does matter. It's a bit 
late to go back to the beginning now but that's water 
under the bridge. Sometimes I feel guilty about us. I 
feel as if I have taken advantage of you for my own 
selfish needs."

"Wanda, if I remember correctly, I forced the issue 
that afternoon."

"You did but somehow I feel I should have been 
stronger."

"Why?"

"That's the question I can't answer."

"Does every question have to have an answer? Can't 
things just happen? An apple falls off a tree when it's 
ripe; why does it fall at a particular moment? Who 
knows? You just pick it up and enjoy its sweetness 
without asking why it fell. We met and things happened 
between us."

"That's one way of looking at us but there's another. A 
lonely older woman seduces an impressionable teenager."

"How about an impressionable teenager seduces a lonely 
older woman?"

There was a second of silence as my remark registered 
with Wanda. She broke up with laughter and when she 
regained control of herself she said, "Either way, the 
apple is sweet. Give your older woman a hug and kiss 
before we go back to work."

We spent the rest of the afternoon in the darkroom. The 
work was relentless and repetitive; over and over we 
did the same things until there was no more film left 
unprinted. Wanda fed all but the last sheets of prints 
into the dryer as I finished developing the pictures in 
the light safe.

"Joe are you as tired as I am?" Wanda asked in a weary 
voice.

"I feel like I have been hoeing corn all day. This can 
be hard work," I replied.

"Did you get a chance to look at what we've been 
printing?"

"Some, but after a while everything looks the same."

"Tomorrow you will get a chance to study all of the 
pictures in detail and I predict that you will get 
tired of looking at naked females."

"Right now I'm tired of looking at pictures period."

"Bet you're not too tired to eat."

"That's one of two things I'm not too tired to do."

***

WANDA'S MUSINGS

A strange noise intruded on her peaceful sleep and 
shocked Wanda fully awake. A blue jay was having a 
dispute with another bird over territory in the big 
tree that shaded the cabin. How could one little bird 
make so much noise? The country was supposed to be 
quiet wasn't it? 

When she had first moved to this cabin in the middle of 
nowhere the absence of street sounds and the hurly-
burly of the city had made the silence almost 
oppressive. After a few weeks she learned that the 
country had noises of its own. City noises were always 
there just below your level of awareness but out here 
the noises were random. You were aware of every little 
chirp and rustle.

In many respects this was the best part of the day. She 
was warm and secure in her safe cocoon of blankets and 
sheets and the demands of the day hadn't intruded yet. 
All she needed was Joe beside her and the moment would 
be perfect. A brief fantasy unfolded in her mind of 
loving touches leading to more serious manifestations 
of love.

Joe was an enthusiastic lover albeit inexperienced. 
With time and practice she could remedy his 
inexperience. He was a blank page eager for her to 
write her knowledge on his innocence. She thought of 
several things she would teach him after he became more 
relaxed about sex. Perhaps discussing the proofs they 
had made would give her the opening to interest Joe in 
the finer points of the loving arts.

An unwelcome thought intruded, "What the hell am I 
doing having an affair with a sixteen year old kid?"

She had thought that little bump in the road had been 
put aside but here it was again. Her conscience and her 
desire had waged a war with each other since the first 
day she had met Joe. He was quiet and unassuming with a 
maturity that belied his years. 

Perhaps that mature aspect was the result of being an 
only child living on an isolated farm with only his 
parents for companionship. His maturity and 
intelligence were attractions that were too strong for 
her to deny. Anyway it was a little too late to start 
over on a new track; the deed had been done and what a 
glorious deed it was.

He was attractive in a rugged way. Barely taller than 
she was, he was muscular from heavy work and moved with 
deliberation as if he knew exactly where he was going. 
Wanda had photographed many models who were 
bodybuilders with sculpted muscles but none had been 
attractive to her. Joe was strong because he had to be 
and hardly paid attention to his strength, so different 
from the models she met in the studio. They were 
narcissistic and were always striking poses; Joe was 
just Joe.

He was different from other men she had met especially 
her ex-boyfriend. Joe was a real person, uncomplicated 
and unsophisticated. When she compared Joe to the ex 
the ex came up short. In the few weeks she had known 
Joe he had been more supportive than her ex had in the 
two years they had been lovers. 

She had never been strongly attached to her boyfriend; 
he was more like a comfortable person to have sex with 
when the need arose. Why had she had a liaison with 
him? She knew why but until this moment had refused to 
face the truth. Her boyfriend had only used her because 
she was willing and available and the same had been 
true for her. 

His infidelities were a testament to his lack of 
commitment to anyone or anything except himself. She 
had refused to believe what was obvious and until this 
moment didn't know why. Now she had to admit she had 
been as selfish as the man she detested so much. Their 
relationship had simply become a habit with both taking 
as much as they could get and giving little in return.

Habit or not her association with him had gotten her 
exiled to the backwoods. It had been a long path but it 
had inevitably led to this cabin in the boondocks where 
she was hiding from the outside world. How had she 
gotten here. Like a movie memories began to run before 
her mind's eye...

...She had a diploma in hand that said she had 
graduated from a two year course in photography and a 
job offer that was outstanding. Life was sweet and she 
had the world by the tail.

***

A few months after going to work at the studio Arthur, 
her boss, asked her to help him with a private shoot. 
She was shocked by her first brush with pornography. 
Jobs like hers were impossible to find so she had gone 
along with everything. She had concentrated on light 
and composition just as if she was shooting a simple 
portrait in the studio and managed to get through the 
job without any major mistakes. After the first 
experience it got easier and easier on following 
occasions. 

Her biggest surprise was learning her brother-in-law 
was involved with the distribution of the pictures. He 
had put in a word or two that got her hired in the 
first place. What the hell, he was a good husband to 
her sister Mary.

As time went on she had become Arthur's lover and they 
had a comfortable year together before he began to 
drift away. The attraction of the many female models 
that posed in front of his camera was just too much for 
Art to resist. 

In the topsy-turvy world they inhabited where fleshy 
pleasures were acted out before the camera in every 
mode possible a straying boyfriend didn't seem so 
improbable. She had been vaguely upset but had put off 
any serious thinking about her situation. She was too 
busy learning the fine points of her profession to have 
time for a serious relationship and besides Art was 
always available when she needed an itch scratched.

A couple of months before the hammer dropped Bill had 
invited her to have a family dinner at his place. Bill 
and her sister had talked long into the night with her 
about setting up a studio and joining Bill in a 
partnership. Bill didn't like the way Arthur did 
business and felt that they would be better off without 
him. She had agreed in principle and started thinking 
about breaking off her liaison with Art.

They didn't really break up; they just drifted apart. 
She kept working as always and had no inkling that she 
was going to be set up for a big fall. Little did she 
know that Art had gotten wind of the changes that were 
afoot and had made plans to remove her as a threat to 
his job.

It started as a normal day. They had a session 
scheduled at a warehouse where they had a bare bones 
studio set up especially for this type of shoot. It was 
supposed to be a tryout for a new female model and the 
male model Art scheduled was an old hand at the porno 
game. 

Just before time to leave for the warehouse Art had 
begged off for one reason or another and had left for 
parts unknown. Since it was a simple tryout Wanda had 
decided to take a 35 mm camera and tripod instead of a 
larger view camera. Why lug a heavy monster around?

When she arrived at the warehouse both models were 
there waiting and she set up in a few minutes. Always 
careful of her shots she captured what she needed on a 
single roll of film and unloaded the camera. She had 
put the film cassette back in its container and dropped 
it in her pocket. Both models cleaned up and dressed as 
she packed away her gear. When she went to the bathroom 
they were sitting on an old sofa fully dressed. 

After she finished in the bathroom she began to walk 
back to the studio area when the door opened with a 
splintering crash and cops rushed into the warehouse. 
She ducked into a shadowy area and heard a cop say 
something about statutory rape.

"Where's the photographer?" one cop asked.

"I think she went to the bathroom," the male model 
replied.

Damn, there was no place to hide the film anywhere in 
sight. She took the little canister and put it in the 
only place the police were not likely to look and 
walked out into the light.

"You the photographer?" a detective in a rumpled suit 
asked.

"Yes, I'm a photographer."

"Where's the film you took?"

"What film? We haven't taken any pictures; you're too 
early." For once in her life she was glad she worked 
fast. The male model gave her the OK sign unseen by 
anyone else. The pictures she had taken would convict 
him of rape and he was obviously relieved when she gave 
him an alibi.

The cops loaded them in cars and hauled them downtown. 
Wanda managed to whisper to the girl, "Nothing 
happened, got that?" The girl managed to nod yes. She 
was scared out of her mind but Wanda hoped she could 
keep to the story. If the girl didn't it would be her 
word and the model's against the girl's.

When they let her make a phone call she called Bill and 
he told her to hang on he'd get them out as soon as 
possible. The cops asked endless questions until a 
lawyer appeared and posted bail. The girl's father 
showed up about the same time and took her home. Wanda 
and the model left with the lawyer.

The lawyer dropped her off at Bill's house and she went 
to the bathroom and retrieved the canister of film; 
being a woman had distinct advantages at times. She hid 
the film in the backyard and decided to let that roll 
of film be her little secret until she knew more. Mary 
didn't know what was going on and she decided to let 
Bill fill her in with what he wanted her to know. She 
didn't like keeping secrets from her sister but in this 
instance she felt justified.

When Bill arrived home he brought both of them up to 
speed on events. The cops had sealed the studio and the 
warehouse and were searching everything. Arthur had set 
her up and sung to the cops.

After a couple of weeks with no evidence except Art's 
testimony the case was dropped. Wanda was advised by 
the lawyer not to open a studio in town anytime in the 
near future; let things cool off a bit. She got the 
message and Bill got the message.

Art left town suddenly; she suspected he had a little 
encouragement but at least he was gone. Bill emptied 
the studio of equipment and stored it away. Almost all 
the cameras and all the darkroom equipment had been 
abandoned by Art in his haste to get away.

Bill had orders for prints to be filled and no 
darkroom; he was scraping the bottom of the barrel with 
the stock he had on hand. They knew they couldn't trust 
any studio in town to do the work so they had to come 
up with a plan to set up their own darkroom in a safe 
place. Bill could schedule shoots with local 
photographers and she could do the lab work.

Bill mentioned a cabin he owned and asked her if she 
would consider spending the summer there. He told her 
about the people who lived in the area and said she 
would be almost totally isolated. Almost all her 
neighbors were moonshiners and would respect her 
privacy if she respected theirs in return. At the time 
it sounded like an ideal setup.

***

Two weeks after she had moved she was ready to scream 
just to hear the noise. She was lonely as she had never 
been lonely before. She was discussing things with 
herself out loud in a two way conversation. Solitude in 
the city could be broken by just going outside your 
home. Here solitude was complete; there was no one to 
be seen anywhere. She had only the squirrels and birds 
for company.

She didn't know anyone locally except Bill's parents. 
After a couple of visits she found them uninteresting 
and they didn't seem quite comfortable with her. That 
left her list of acquaintances at absolutely zero until 
the day Joe suddenly appeared out of the woods.

She had looked up from her camera and there he was 
waving and calling a greeting to her from the other 
side of the clearing. She had been frightened for a 
minute but his open smile and polite manner had put 
that to rest. Had she not dropped the piece of 
cardboard from the film box he would never had come 
down the mountain. 

As the afternoon passed and she had more time to study 
him she found she liked this boy/man more than she 
cared to admit. He was intelligent, he was shy, he was 
confident, and he was attractive. Her weeks of enforced 
loneliness had stripped her of her usual reservations 
and left her emotions and desires bare to whatever 
stimuli present in her immediate surroundings; Joe was 
an overwhelming stimulus.

Had she met him in her normal surroundings in the city 
she would have found him a cute boy and immediately 
went on to other things but here in the solitude of the 
mountains he was like an island to a shipwreck victim. 
He was uncritical of her and her habits, he loved 
conversation, and he could damn well scratch the itches 
he aroused. 

Wanda remembered the first night after she had met him. 
She had had a war in her mind over what her body 
desired and what her good sense denied her body. This 
was only a boy her good sense reminded her and her 
body's desire demanded relief for the hunger that Joe's 
presence had aroused. 

Good sense said she was older than Joe and her body 
replied with the fact that six years wasn't much in the 
way of years. On and on her mental war had surged back 
and forth until an uneasy truce had been forged between 
her mental combatants. She would present herself as 
attractively as possible but do nothing overt until Joe 
had made a definite move. 

He had been shy but when things had come to a climax he 
had been uncharacteristically direct. He had simply 
pulled her to her feet and crushed her in his arms. 
Good sense had resisted for a moment or two but at last 
given up. Only occasionally did she have doubts about 
right and wrong.

Did she love Joe? She didn't think so, not yet anyway. 
Could she love him? That would have to wait and let 
time settle that. Did Joe love her? He probably thought 
he did but right now she thought he was enamored with 
sex. In time she would find out what he really felt. 

Right now all she wanted was to enjoy his freshness and 
his young strength. To hell with good sense; sometimes 
something good came along and common sense rationalized 
it out of existence. There was a title of a book or a 
movie that came to mind, "Reap the Wild Wind", that was 
what she would do and let events carry her where they 
may...

...A knock on her door announced Joe's arrival. She 
knew what she wanted before she had breakfast.


COMING TOGETHER

When Wanda opened the door she threw herself in his 
arms and wrapped around him like a snake. He had never 
seen her like this before; she was like a hungry 
lioness devouring her prey and like a lioness she was 
insatiable. She took him to his limits as he tried to 
satisfy her need and just as he was about to cry 
"Uncle" she collapsed on his chest in a limp heap and 
showered him with kisses.

When he tried to speak she put a finger to his lips 
asking for silence. What had happened since last night? 
She had always been a little reserved before or had she 
just been echoing his shyness? This was a new Wanda; a 
totally uninhibited version of the woman he had thought 
was in total control of herself. 

If she was going to act like this at times he would 
have to adjust his opinion of her. Did he like the 
woman he was with at this moment? There was only one 
answer to that, emphatically yes! Wanda had changed 
overnight and his curiosity was pricked. Patience, she 
would tell him in time.

"Good morning lover," Wanda said speaking her first 
words since he had arrived.

"Good morning to you or should I say 'Great day in the 
morning!' What happened to you?"

"Let's just say I cleaned some junk out of the attic. 
I'll tell you about it sometime but right now I'm so 
hungry I could eat a horse. Have you had breakfast 
yet?"

"Yes but I could use a cup of coffee."

After Wanda had breakfast she cleared the kitchen table 
and put the contact sheets in a stack on the table. She 
got a magnifier and set it beside the stack of 
pictures.

"Joe, I haven't explained what Bill does with the 
pictures after we print them. Some are made into 
various size glossies and some are printed onto cards 
like baseball cards. Most are sold to GI's at military 
training bases where there are many lonely young men. 
Some are sold in bulk lots to other distributors. "

"What we have to do is try to pick out the interesting 
pictures and make some large prints for Bill to sell. 
We'll make snapshot size prints of everything that came 
out for him to pick and choose for himself. Since you 
are a young man I want you to go through this lot and 
pick the ones that you like. Think you can do that?"

"After this morning I don't know if I want to look at 
pictures or not."

"After this morning if it tickles your fancy it will 
have to be a great picture," Wanda said with a chuckle. 
"Start with the 4X5's and work down through the smaller 
sizes."

I started looking at pictures and found that I wasn't 
as satisfied as I had imagined. There were pictures of 
women posing alone or with male or female partners. 
Yesterday I had been so busy trying to keep up with 
Wanda I hadn't had time to really look at what I was 
developing. Today I had the time to study each picture 
in detail. I got an education in sex as I sat studying 
each picture.

I saw pictures of girls with girls, girls with toys, 
girls with vegetables, and girls with boys using every 
orifice of the female body. I had heard of boys having 
oral sex with women but I saw my first example of a 
sixty-nine and stopped shuffling pictures and just 
stared.

Wanda noticed my curiosity and asked, "Do you have a 
problem with that picture?"

I thought for a moment before I answered with a 
question of my own, "Do girls really enjoy that?"

"Yes if the man knows how to do it right."

"Do you like to do that?" I blurted out before I had a 
chance to think. I could feel my face redden as Wanda 
considered her answer.

She was silent for many long seconds before she 
replied, "Only if I'm with the right person and the 
mood is right." She gave me a hug before she continued, 
"Now that you've asked I guess you have some ideas."

"All of this is strange to me except the regular stuff. 
I don't know what is right and what is wrong."

"When you love a person nothing is right or wrong. You 
just try to give your partner as much pleasure as you 
can and your partner tries to do the same for you. 
Whatever is agreeable to both people is the only test 
for right and wrong."

"I've heard all kinds of stories about sex but what I 
see in these pictures makes me doubt most of it. 
Everyone seems to be enjoying all the different kinds 
of sex."

"Most of what you have heard from your friends is 
wrong. Most are as innocent as you were when I met you 
and they make up stories to appear more worldly than 
they really are. The people in these pictures are 
posing for pay and even if they weren't enjoying 
themselves they would appear so for the camera. 
Everything you have seen is fun for someone at one time 
or another."

"I guess I have a lot to learn."

Wanda laughed and said, "Just call me teacher."

Just before lunch I had the first batch of pictures 
sorted into two piles; one pile of pictures I liked and 
one that didn't interest me. Wanda looked through both 
piles and agreed with my picks. She chose several 
pictures from my pile of rejects and added them to the 
other pile. We took a break and sat on the porch 
enjoying the cool breeze.

As I thought about the pictures laying on the kitchen 
table I wondered about the pictures Wanda had shown me 
that first day. Those were pictures that spoke to my 
soul and now we were working on pictures that spoke to 
my balls. I wanted to learn how to make pictures like 
the first examples. I didn't have a quarrel with the 
latest stuff but if she could make pictures of ordinary 
things that spoke to a person why did she do the other?

I gathered up my courage and asked, "Wanda, do you like 
making porno pictures?"

She chuckled and got a rueful expression on her face as 
she answered, "No, I don't particularly enjoy it but I 
like to eat and porn pays the bills."

"I liked the first pictures you showed me; are you 
going to make more like those?"

"I will just as soon as I get caught up with Bill's 
orders. I want you to go with me so I can teach you as 
I look for pictures. If we work at it we can be 
finished with the prints by Friday and I'll ship them 
out. Then we can concentrate on what I like to do and 
what you need to learn."

"I think you can make great pictures," I observed.

Wanda answered me with a hug and a kiss. "Joe, I'm glad 
you found that film box on the mountain."

I was glad too.

Wanda had been right and by late Friday afternoon we 
finished the last of the prints. We packed them in 
boxes and they made a tidy little stack. Tomorrow we 
would drop them of at the warehouse in Mt. Wildwood.

Wanda drove me home and Mom invited her to stay for 
dinner. Wanda and Mom stayed in the kitchen while Dad 
and I finished the chores around the place. When we 
came back inside dinner was ready to put on the table 
and we cleaned up while the women laid out the food. 

Dinner was a festive affair with company and Wanda was 
still considered company. Afterward we sat on the porch 
and watched lightning bugs and talked. Wanda invited 
everyone out for a movie and dinner tomorrow night and 
Mom and Dad accepted. I was feeling warm and fuzzy; 
Wanda was my lover and my parent's friend. What more 
could I ask for?

Saturday was a quick trip into town to deliver the 
boxes and a stop at the camera store to pick up 
supplies. I loaded bags and boxes as Wanda discussed 
things she would need in the future. She and the owner 
were haggling over the price of something as I carried 
her purchases to the car. She joined me in a moment 
with a smile on her face.

"That guy tried to hold me up but I got the best of the 
deal," she said laughing.

"As much as you buy off him he should give you a 
discount," I replied.

"I thought so too."

The rest of the day passed as usual. We went to dinner 
and a movie with my parents and afterward stopped by 
the little restaurant for beers and a soda. The usual 
crowd was there and the guys waved a friendly hello to 
me as we came in. The girls stared at Wanda with open 
curiosity. 

Sunday afternoon we all got together at my house for 
dinner and afterward the adults had a few drinks and 
talked into the night. This was getting to be a ritual. 
When it was time to leave Wanda had me drive her home 
claiming she had too much of Dad's elixir. When we got 
out of sight of the house she slid over to my side and 
hugged me as I drove through the night. By the time we 
got to the cabin I was too far gone to leave right away 
and she invited me in for a quick interlude.

When I drove up to my house I was surprised to find Dad 
waiting up for me. He invited me to sit with him on a 
bench by the barn out of earshot of the house.

"I don't guess I have ever had a birds and bees talk 
with you have I?" he asked.

"No, I don't think so."

"I think it's a little too late for that now isn't it?"

"What do you mean Dad?"

"I won't ask you to violate a lady's trust but I think 
I had better speak my piece. You and Wanda are a lot 
closer than you let on. You don't have to admit 
anything to me and you certainly don't have to deny it 
either. You're almost grown and in a year you'll be old 
enough to do what you want without asking permission. 

"I think Wanda is a good woman. She's smart and she's 
good looking to boot. There's only one of two reasons 
she would take up with you. The first that comes to 
mind is she simply wants someone to take care of her 
needs; the second is she truly likes you. If I thought 
it was the first I would warn you to take what you 
could get and not get too attached to her. Remember 
that little pig you bottle fed and raised as a pet?"

I couldn't see where Dad was going with this 
conversation so I simply nodded my head.

"You had a lot of fun raising the pig but if I remember 
correctly you were a sad little boy when we made 
sausage out of him. Wanda is a grown woman and has 
responsibilities far from our little burg. What happens 
when she has to leave? Where does that leave you? I 
have seen her look at you and I have seen you look at 
her and I don't think it is as simple as that. She has 
feelings for you and I don't think she will just let go 
and leave. Which brings up another question. How do you 
feel about her?"

I was speechless for a moment or two. Dad had guessed 
everything that had happened. He didn't seem upset or 
angry; he just seemed concerned about me and my 
feelings. I remembered his jibe that first Sunday Wanda 
had visited and decided to level with him. "I'm not 
sure what I feel. This is all new to me and I am just 
finding my way along. I know one thing for sure and 
that is I have never felt this way about anyone before. 
I think Wanda feels the same way about me but she is 
older and I could be wrong."

"Son, Wanda is either the worst bitch in the world or 
she is truly interested in you. I have been dealing 
with a bunch of crooks most of my life and I consider 
myself a fair judge of character. I think Wanda is the 
genuine article. She's a grown woman and she has made 
her choice. The problem is are you mature enough to 
make that choice? If not someone is going to get hurt. 
You're my son and I don't want to see you hurt but damn 
it all to hell I like Wanda and I don't want to see her 
hurt either."

A silence fell between us and the only sound was the 
chirping of crickets. I hadn't thought about what 
happened when the summer was over. Hadn't she said she 
was only here for the summer? What happened when she 
left? Where did that leave me and where did that leave 
Wanda? I remembered her conversation about us being 
only lovers and either could walk away. Could I walk 
away? I didn't think so. Could she?

Was it Monday morning when she had almost attacked me 
as I came through the door? Wordless we had made love 
and when I had tried to say something she had put a 
finger on my lips to keep me quiet. Had she been afraid 
of what I was going to say. I was going to tell her how 
much I loved her and perhaps she had guessed what my 
words would be. Did I love her? If this wasn't love 
then I don't think I could stand the real thing.

"Dad, I didn't know things could get this complicated. 
I thought things would be simple. I expected to meet a 
girl, fall in love, get married, and live happily ever 
after. I met a woman, fell in love with her, and now 
everything is like a tangled bowl of spaghetti."

Dad laughed an honest laugh that came from deep inside. 
"Joe, I think you have just figured out what it means 
to be an adult. I'll give you my best advice; do what 
you feel is right. You'll make mistakes but not too 
many. Wanda isn't one of them; that's one hell of a 
woman you've picked. I don't know how you did it but my 
hat's off to you. Your secret is safe with me. Your Mom 
hasn't figured it out yet but she will in time and if 
she doesn't see things my way I'll try to convince her. 
Let's go to bed now it's late."

The next couple of weeks Wanda began to teach me the 
hard part of photography. She had an eye for a picture 
in places where I only saw a tangle of confusion. She 
explained it by reversing the forest and the trees 
simile. I had to look at the forest and see a single 
tree. Understanding came slowly and after a while I 
could discuss a scene with a grain of intelligence. 
Sometimes our discussions became heated and if I gave 
in to her opinion too quickly she would jump all over 
me.

"You must have opinions if you are ever going to be a 
photographer and if you have a strong opinion stick by 
it Joe. Don't roll over just because I say this is a 
better picture; make me convince you and you try to 
convince me that your idea is better."

"I don't like to argue with you. It hurts me to make 
you angry. I love you too much to ever want to hurt 
you." There I'd said what I had wanted to tell her for 
weeks. I hadn't planned to say that but the I love you 
had just slipped out.

"I don't consider this arguing; we are simply 
discussing something that each of us has a strong 
opinion about. Don't worry about hurting my feelings 
over how to shoot a picture; my feelings are 
unimportant when I am trying to get you to change the 
way you look at things. Sometimes I take the opposite 
position just to challenge you and to make you think 
about the subject we are discussing; remember that. 
Lets pack up the camera and go home; we've lost the 
light."

We packed up and walked back to the cabin. After we had 
put the gear away Wanda got sodas and we sat on the 
porch opposite each other at the table. She was 
twirling the soda bottle between her hands and was 
preoccupied with deep thoughts. I kept still until she 
was ready to talk.

"Joe, you said you loved me too much to argue with me a 
little while ago. I have been trying to keep the 
subject from coming up but now I guess it's out and 
there's no going back. There's a lot you don't know 
about me and if you did you might have a different 
opinion of me. I think you should hear about my dark 
side before you go making declarations of love. Do you 
want me to tell you about myself?"

"When I said I love you I meant it. I love the person 
that is sitting here with me. I don't know anything 
about your past but if you want to tell me I'll listen 
but I don't think it will change how I feel."

"Perhaps not but I want you to know the woman you say 
you love," she said.

I listened as she told me about Art, Bill, her sister, 
and the events that got her arrested. When she wound 
down all I could feel was anger at Art's betrayal but 
without it I would have never met her. I owed him that. 

I took her hands in mine and looked her in the eyes as 
I said, "Wanda, I love you and nothing you have said 
has made any difference."

Tears began to stream down her face and she came into 
my arms and our kiss was long and filled with passion. 
"Joe, I've tried to deny my feelings for you. I didn't 
want to do anything to hurt you but I love you too. For 
what it's worth you have a steady girlfriend, a little 
old, but steady all the same."


SUMMER'S LOVE

The days turned into weeks and Wanda and I explored the 
new-found territory of romance. There was much 
agreement between us but there were areas where we held 
different opinions. The differences are the spice of 
love adding excitement when we discovered them and 
learning to accommodate the other's differences taught 
both of us to be caring and considerate. 

Sometimes we had heated arguments over some trivial 
matter but when we finished; it was finished. We never 
had the same fight twice. There were storms and gentle 
rains; the wind blew hot, cold, and most times as a 
gentle breeze, but we were in the springtime of our 
love and like the spring there was warm sunshine and 
flowers.

My birthday wasn't supposed to be a terribly special 
day. Custom at my house was a special meal for dinner 
and gifts from Mom and Dad. After breakfast Dad asked 
me to go into town with him to pick up some new tires 
for the pickup truck. He had been working on it with my 
help getting it in shape for the fall harvest. He has 
said he was going to try to make it last for a few more 
seasons.

We drove into town and dropped the pickup off at a tire 
dealer. Dad and I picked out a set of new tires. I was 
surprised when he deferred to my opinion. That matter 
settled we walked down the street and looked at cars 
and trucks at a car dealer. Dad was taken by one pickup 
and we looked it over and discussed its merits. It 
would be ideal for Dad on the farm.

"Hell, I think I'll just buy it," Dad exclaimed.

"Dad, you just had new tires put on our old truck. Are 
you going to trade in a truck with brand new tires?" I 
asked incredulous over Dad's decision. He never did 
anything on the spur of the moment except to duck a 
punch.

"Why trade the old one in; couldn't you get some use 
out of it?"

I stood in shocked silence as the import of what Dad 
had just said sunk in to my unbelieving mind. The 
second dream of every teenage boy had just been 
realized.

"Happy birthday son and thank your Mom for the new 
tires and the radio."

Words failed me and all I could think to do was hug 
Dad. He was embarrassed by my public show of affection 
and said, "Save your hugs for Wanda boy or I'll take 
her away from you."

"Thanks Dad for the best birthday gift ever."

As we drove home I marveled at how much the familiar 
old pickup had changed. I had driven it for a year and 
even taken my driver's test with it but it was 
different now; it was mine. A brand new radio was 
installed in the dash where none had been before. I 
turned it on and flipped through the stations. I 
settled on a music station and followed Dad's tail 
lights back to the farm.

When we drove up in the farmyard Wanda's car was parked 
beside ours. Mom and Wanda came out to meet us and 
admire our new pickups. I gave Mom a big hug of thanks 
for her gifts.

Surprises weren't over yet. When we walked into the 
kitchen Wanda had me close my eyes and led me into the 
living room. When I was allowed to open my eyes I 
couldn't believe what I saw. The living room had been 
converted into a basic studio. There were lights, a 
neutral background and on a tripod sat a 4X5 view 
camera. I was suffering from overload.

"Happy birthday," Wanda said.

Overcome by the moment I kissed her with all the 
passion I could muster with both parents looking on. 
When I came up for air there was an embarrassed moment 
of silence.

Mom broke the silence with, "I think all this stuff is 
supposed to take pictures. Can I be first?"

Everyone laughed as the awkward moment passed. I posed 
Mom and covered my embarrassment with activity. Wanda 
offered advice and in a few moments I had snapped my 
first picture with the new camera.

The party was on. Mom had prepared a special lunch and 
Wanda had baked a birthday cake. Afterward we loaded up 
in my pickup and drove to a favorite swimming hole on 
the creek a few miles away. Some of my friends were 
there and I got envious looks, not all of them for my 
birthday presents. Of course I took my camera and 
snapped pictures of the women and girls in bathing 
suits.

We swam and played games in the water. Wanda was like a 
little kid when it came to swimming. She would take any 
dare and dived out of an overhanging tree from the 
highest branches with the bravest of the boys. I 
couldn't be outdone by a woman so I had to screw up my 
courage and follow her. I learned something new about 
Wanda; she was very athletic and could out-swim and 
out-dive most of the boys including me. She was a hit 
with almost all my friends except for a couple of the 
girls.

After a stop for hamburgers we drove home. Everyone was 
worn out from all the day's excitement and Wanda 
politely excused herself early. I walked to her car 
with her and kissed her goodbye in the darkness.

"Thanks for a wonderful day; this has been the best 
birthday I have ever had," I said and kissed her again.

"When you come over tomorrow I'll give you the rest of 
your birthday present," she replied and kissed me again 
before getting in her car and driving away.

When I walked back into the house Mom was waiting in 
the kitchen alone. "Sit down Joe; it's time we had a 
little talk."

I knew what the subject would be and I was afraid Mom 
was going to put me in an impossible position. I had 
never defied my parents but if Mom forbade me to see 
Wanda I would have to disobey her. "This is about Wanda 
isn't it?"

"Yes Joe it is. You two have behaved perfectly in 
public except for that little scene in the living room 
today. That can be forgotten; with the excitement of 
the moment I can understand that you got carried away. 
You are seventeen now and there's not much I could do 
to stop what's been going on between the two of you and 
while I don't approve you are mature enough to make 
your own decisions. Times change and people change but 
gossip remains the same. Do you understand what I am 
saying?"

"Yes Mom, we don't want any gossip either."

"I talked with Wanda today and she is a very level 
headed woman except when it comes to you. I like her 
and sometime in the future I would welcome her as a 
daughter-in-law but until then I expect you to be a 
perfect gentleman in public."

It felt as if I had put down a heavy load. I hadn't 
realized how much tension my little secret had caused 
until this moment and now I felt as if I would float 
away. A new emotion floated to the surface; I 
discovered why a son loves his mother. A son can do no 
wrong; only bend the rules a little in a mother's eyes. 
I went to her and gave her a hug that expressed my 
appreciation and love. "Thanks for understanding Mom."

"What's to understand? Wanda is a very bright woman and 
she'll make a wife who'll keep you hopping for the rest 
of your life. At the bottom of all this I'm proud to 
have a son who can attract someone like her. Wanda and 
I expect great things out of you."

Mom's last remark left me wondering about my perception 
of women. I had been raised in a male dominated 
environment but what she had said put a little dent in 
my understanding of how things were supposed to be.

The following day Wanda surprised me with a suggestion 
that we take a trip to visit Bill and Mary. We could 
visit her old school and if I liked it perhaps I could 
enroll after I graduated next year. We could see all 
the sights like tourists and we wouldn't have to hide 
the fact that we were lovers.

"What about Bill and Mary?" I asked.

"They know all about us. Mary's my sister and we don't 
keep secrets; she's dying to meet the man who tamed me 
to use her words. Did you tame me?"

"I hope not; you'd be boring as a lap dog."

"A dog I'm not, a little catty perhaps, but I 
understand what you mean. What do you say; want to go?"

"I think it would be fun but I'll have to talk to Mom 
and Dad first."

"I don't think you will have a problem there so now all 
we have to decide is when to leave. Will your truck 
make the trip? I need to bring back a lot of stuff and 
it would be easier if we took the pickup."

I think so; Dad went over it before he gave it to me. 
There's a cover that goes over the bed like a little 
house Dad built when he wanted to haul stuff he didn't 
want people to see. I could put it back on and we would 
have a safe, dry place for your stuff. I guess we could 
leave in a couple of days."

"How about next week? I have some prints to make for 
Bill and we could deliver them when we go."

"Sounds good to me. I've never been more than fifty 
miles from this place before."

"Except when we take a trip to the moon," Wanda said 
with a wicked laugh.

A couple of days later Wanda took me shopping for some 
clothes in a town. She picked out a suit and a couple 
of casual outfits that were a little more mature than 
my usual wardrobe. I could see the wisdom of her 
choices and I did look her age when I dressed in her 
choices.

Finally the big day arrived and I could hardly contain 
my excitement. I woke up so early it was still dark. 
Mom and Dad got up and helped me put my things in the 
pickup. Mom made coffee and filled a thermos for Wanda 
and me to drink on the road. Both hugged me as if I was 
never to return. This was my first trip away from home 
and for a moment I was more than a little scared. I 
drove out of the farmyard and they waved goodbye as the 
darkness swallowed my last sight of home.

Strangely the lights were on when I drove up to the 
cabin. Wanda was up and ready to go. 

"I see you couldn't sleep either," she said as I came 
through the door.

"The sooner we start the sooner we get there. By the 
time it gets light we'll be in places I've never seen 
before," I replied.

"And tonight we'll do something we've never done 
before."

"What's that?" I asked.

"We'll get to sleep beside the one we love and tomorrow 
morning I'll not wake up in an empty bed."

The miles rolled by punctuated by small towns along the 
highway. We had breakfast at a little restaurant in a 
nameless town and continued on our way. Wanda was fun 
as a traveling companion; she talked about the scenery 
and pointed out places that would look good on a 
postcard. At times she would sit close beside me with 
her head on my shoulder and tease me until I gave 
serious thought about stopping and dragging her in the 
back of the truck. 

Once on a lonely stretch of road she pulled her dress 
up and "took my picture" with a lovely view of her 
nether parts. We were two silly people, very much in 
love, and having fun. When it came her turn to drive I 
repaid her teasing in like coin.

We stopped at a roadside inn just before dark and 
rented a cabin. I couldn't remember ever sleeping with 
anyone in my entire life and sleeping with Wanda would 
take some adjustment on my part. I woke up several 
times during the night with various parts of the female 
anatomy pressed against me and naturally I had to 
respond. The sun was well up in the sky when we resumed 
our trip the next morning and neither of us was in a 
teasing mood, at least not that kind of teasing.

Wanda drove into Bill and Mary's driveway about six 
that evening. They welcomed us and helped us put out 
things in the guest room. I looked at Wanda with a 
question in my eyes and she only winked back at me. 
When we were alone she said, "Bill and Mary are a 
little more liberal than the folks are where you live."

After dinner we talked into the night. Mary and Wanda 
had to catch up on each other's lives and Bill and I 
hadn't seen each other in a couple of years. Bill got 
beers all around and when he handed me one Wanda 
laughingly said, "You're teaching a minor bad habits."

"After what you've taught Joe I don't think a beer is a 
bad habit. Mary watch him and keep your pants on; Joe 
must be some kind of man to keep your horny sister in 
line."

Three people laughed uproariously and I turned red as a 
beet.

When the laughter died down Bill said, "Sorry Joe, I 
didn't mean to embarrass you but you've made me proud 
and proved what I've always said; men from the hills 
make the best lovers."

"I can't argue with that," Wanda replied and gave me an 
affectionate hug. "Mary if Bill isn't treating you 
right I'll consider sharing Joe with you; sisters 
always share."

I recovered from the shock of their ribald exchange and 
found that I liked these people very much. "Don't I 
have something to say about that?" I threw out as a 
general question.

"Thanks Joe, you've just struck a blow for the 
independence of men. Let's go out back and sit on the 
patio and talk where we can have some peace and not 
have to listen to the chatter of two women who want to 
gossip."

"And what are you going to do if it isn't gossip about 
the old home place?" Mary said to her husband's back as 
Bill walked out the door.

I learned something that first night at Bill's; women 
like Mary and Wanda had a fire in their belly and were 
fiercely independent. They loved their men with the 
same ferocity and expected their men to give them 
enough space to show how much they could love. I was an 
apprentice in more ways than one but I was a willing 
apprentice and I would learn how to keep Wanda happy 
just as I would learn to be a photographer.

The next morning I found that everyone slept late at 
Bill's house, late by my standards. Around eight 
o'clock people began stirring and coming out to the 
kitchen to find I had already made coffee.

Wanda bragged on my cooking skills so I stirred up a 
country breakfast with a little help from Mary. Bill 
did justice to the food and proclaimed this was one 
thing he missed about the country.

Mary gave me a hug in thanks and said, "If you ever get 
tired of Wanda just give me a call and I'll leave 
Bill."

I had gotten the hang of their jokes and replied, 
"That's an offer I'll consider but Bill is a crack shot 
and we'd have to be looking over our shoulder all the 
time."

"Perhaps you should consider seeing Mary the next time 
you wake up with a tent pole," Wanda said in mock 
seriousness.

"By all means," Mary laughed, "Bill just wakes up."

"Joe lets get dressed and get out of this house full of 
horny women; next they will be comparing the size of 
our dicks."

That remark raised some derisive laughter from Mary and 
Wanda. Bill and I finished dressing and he showed me 
around his operation. He had an office at home and he 
stored his merchandise it in the garage. We drove to a 
printer's shop and loaded cases of four color pictures 
and decks of cards. Most of the pictures I recognized 
from prints Wanda and I had made at the cabin.

We returned home in time for lunch and after we 
unloaded his station wagon ate in haste and left for 
talks with a couple of studios about future shoots. At 
one studio I admired some example shots the 
photographer had displayed. When Bill explained that I 
was Wanda's apprentice he went into great detail about 
the techniques he had used to get the final results. 
Business finished with the studios Bill drove me around 
to see some of his customers.

An independent bus line had the contract to operate 
between the base and town. The downtown stop was at a 
huge arcade which had many little shops selling 
trinkets and items of interest to the young soldiers. 
There were two tattoo parlors already busy with 
customers. We went to a newsstand and Bill introduced 
me as one of his associates. 

Bill talked with the owner and I wandered into a little 
viewing room in back where he had a display of all the 
stuff we did. I was pleased to find much of the stuff I 
had picked was available. There were glossy prints that 
Wanda and I had sweated over in the cabin and bound 
magazines filled with pictures as familiar as a family 
album.

When we left and began walking down the street to a 
bookstore Bill asked me, "Didn't you see enough of 
those pictures when you were making them?"

"I got my fill of that kind of picture pretty fast but 
it is another thing to see them in a magazine or a 
book. I saw prints in there that I had made and now 
someone will want them enough to buy them. That's an 
entirely different feeling."

"Shit Joe, you sound just like Wanda. No wonder that 
the two of you got together. By the way, 
congratulations, you've got good taste in women; Wanda 
is one fine catch and from what I can see she's fell 
for you hook, line, and sinker. How did you do it?"

"I don't know what I did; things just happened. The 
more we saw of each other the more the years between us 
melted away until they weren't important anymore."

"Want to throw in with us and help in the business?"

"I have another year of high school to finish and Wanda 
and I have been talking about photography school. It'll 
be a long time before I can answer that."

"Good answer but keep the offer in mind. I need Wanda 
and after this summer I can see that I need you. Wanda 
says you have the eye for good pictures. She told me 
that you picked most of the pictures I'm selling now 
and I will tell you the truth; they're selling better 
than the older pictures. You see something that I 
can't. I can sell whatever you two print but I would be 
out of business if I had to choose the merchandise."

We arrived at the bookstore and while Bill talked with 
the owner I looked around. The owner led me into a back 
room where he kept his special items and I got a chance 
to see what others were doing in our line of work. Two 
magazines caught my attention and I asked Bill to get 
them for me to study. To my surprise he asked no 
questions and paid for them.

Back on the street we walked back to the car and drove 
home. The garage was awash in boxes. Mary and Wanda had 
been putting together orders while we made the rounds. 
After dinner Bill and I made several deliveries and 
finally returned home.

Bill and Mary worked on the books in the office and 
Wanda and I watched TV in the living room. We talked 
about my day and discussed the picture that had caught 
my attention. I had been exposed to so many new things 
that my mind was fairly buzzing with the overload. 
Wanda took me to bed and put me to sleep in her own 
special way.

The next morning I was up and about hours before 
everyone else. I made a pot of coffee and studied the 
magazines Bill had bought yesterday. I went out to the 
garage and picked out a couple of Bill's magazines and 
compared them to the others. An idea began to form as I 
looked at the pictures and read the text. Mary walked 
in and poured herself a cup of coffee and joined me at 
the table.

"Reading porn so early in the morning Joe?"

"I guess so. The magazines don't sell all that well do 
they?"

"How'd you guess? We turn just enough profit to keep 
selling them."

"I think I have an idea. Want to hear it?"

"Shoot, I'm all ears," Mary said.

"Look at the magazine about the nudists. The pictures 
aren't sexy; they are all about people doing routine 
things without their clothes but when you read the text 
it ties in with the pictures and together the pictures 
and the text tells a coherent story."

Mary studied the magazine for a few minutes and when 
she looked up said, "OK, I see what you mean about it. 
What's your point?"

"Look at this magazine and read the text that goes with 
the pictures."

Mary dutifully followed my instructions and when she 
finished she looked at me expectantly not offering a 
word.

"Were the pictures sexy?"

"Yes."

"Did the text tie the pictures together and make a 
story?"

"No, they tried but it was too big a reach from one 
picture to the next."

"Here are two of Bill's magazines and they are no 
better. What if a series of pictures were shot to fit a 
story? You'd have the coherence of the nudist magazine 
and the sexy pictures of the porn magazine."

Mary thought for a few seconds and said, "People who 
buy these magazines want to see pictures of sex. They 
don't want to read a long story."

"I'll bet the same people read comic books too and a 
comic book has very little text but it does have a 
plot."

"Can't argue with that Joe but porn magazines have been 
this way for a long time."

"Buggy whip salesmen did a land office business until 
the car came along and then they became used car 
salesmen."

Mary almost spilled her coffee she laughed so hard. 
Bill walked in and asked, "What's so funny?"

When Mary got control of herself she replied, "After 
this morning's talk with Joe I'm about to trash the 
next edition of our magazine and start over. Joe get 
Wanda up and lets have an editorial conference."

Much later and a second pot of coffee Mary and I sold 
my idea to Bill and Wanda. Now we had a problem; where 
to get the pictures. Wanda came up with an idea that 
would work. Hire the models and bring them here and 
shoot the pictures using the house as the props. I had 
brought all my equipment with me and Wanda said she 
could use my stuff for the shoot. The cover would be 
the only color shots and she could do that with her 35 
mm.

I thought Wanda was tough to work with until Mary co-
opted my services to help with the magazine layout. 
Mary is a bitch when she works. I soon found out that 
she was the sparkplug of the whole operation. I learned 
more about how a magazine goes together than I ever 
wanted to learn.

One day in a quiet moment I told her that the next time 
I got an idea I would keep it to myself. She laughed 
and asked me what I wanted for a pen name; assistant 
editors had to have their name on the magazine. Funny, 
Mary didn't appear so bitchy anymore.

I never thought I would be grateful to Miss Prune for 
anything but her uncompromising standards had given me 
the tools to help Mary with the writing. We worked long 
into the night polishing each sentence until Wanda's 
pictures and our text flowed together as a story. 

Somewhere I found the time to write my parents and ask 
them if I could stay for a couple of weeks longer; I 
had found a job. Their answer was simple; be back in 
time to start school or Dad would come looking for me 
with his shotgun. In my family that was considered 
humor.

Came the day when we delivered everything to the 
printer and could take a break. We were too tired to do 
much more than sit around the house and drink beer that 
evening. Mary, Wanda, and I had beat our brains out on 
the magazine while Bill had done double duty filling 
orders and distributing the merchandise to the 
customers. Something had changed while we had all 
toiled away; we had become a close knit team and 
friends. Bill and Mary had become the brother and 
sister I never had.

"The next time I want to introduce you to a boyfriend 
shoot me Mary," Wanda joked.

"I don't think there will be a next time. If you ditch 
Joe you won't be welcome here."

"Thanks sister. What do you think Joe; have you grown 
tired of your old lady?"

"No, I'm just too tired to enjoy her."

"A couple of days rest will take care of that. What do 
you think Bill; do we have a best seller on our hands 
or will we go bust."

"I think it will sell; I've talked the magazine up with 
all my customers and told them about the new format. 
What's surprising is my special customers have shown an 
interest and they have never bought anything but 
glossies before."

"One thing we haven't discussed and that is how much 
Joe gets from sales," Mary said.

"I vote we make him a partner in this issue and give 
him an eighth share of net," Bill said.

"It'll screw up my bookkeeping but I second that," Mary 
agreed.

"I don't have to vote so I'll just keep giving you my 
undivided attention," Wanda laughed and gave me a hug 
and a peck on the cheek.

"What do you say Joe; want to join our unholy band?" 
Bill asked.

"I think I did a couple of weeks ago. Wanda will have 
to quit littering the woods with film boxes now."


RUMINATIONS OF AN OLD MAN

Where have all the years gone? That evening in Bill and 
Mary's living room could have been yesterday not forty 
odd years ago. What happened to the horny teenager and 
the lonely woman exiled to a tiny cabin in the woods? 
We got older, raised our children, and as time and 
circumstances permitted made the kind of pictures we 
liked.

Wanda has carved herself a niche as a nature 
photographer and still shoots pictures of tree limbs, 
flowers, and whatever scene strikes her fancy. Her work 
has appeared on postcards, in some of the most 
prestigious glossy magazines, and everything in 
between.

My specialty has been nudes. I have an undying love for 
the female form that has only grown from that time when 
Wanda slowly undressed for me so long ago in the cabin. 
Sometimes, when I'm lucky, I capture the excitement of 
that moment when a young man had his first glimpse of a 
beautiful woman naked and filled with passion. There is 
no more pleasing sight on this earth.

Perhaps when Wanda wakes up we could...

END

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
It's okay to *READ* stories about unprotected sex with
others outside a monogamous relationship. But it isn't
okay to *HAVE* unprotected sex with people other than
a trusted partner. 4-million people around the world 
contract HIV every year. You only have one body per 
lifetime, so take good care of it!
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Kristen's collection - Directory 65