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K R I S T E N' S C O L L E C T I O N
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WARNING!
This text file contains sexually explicit
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This work is copyrighted to the author © 2007. Please
don't remove the author information or make any changes
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Homework Assignment
By Master JWLMAN's submissive (address withheld)
***
I am Master JWLMAN. This story was a homework
assignment of MY newest submissive. W/we have been
working together for a few weeks. The submissive is a
complete novice with no lifestyle experience. In fact,
MY new sun is a 22-year-old virgin. I will admit that
she shows promise, especially in that she completed
this task while having her period. (F-solo, mast)
***
I'm not really sure where to start exactly so I guess
I'll start at the beginning...
A few days ago, I went to bed preparing to wake up with
a task given by my Master. Before signing off, He told
me to spend the entire day (beginning at 9am),
masturbating at the beginning of every hour for 15
minutes. I was not permitted to cum during any of these
sessions every hour. I was to be on line and available
to talk to Him for whenever He decided to check in, and
I was to picture Him standing over me as I was doing
this. Aside from these aspects, I was also to
masturbate in every room of the apartment at least once
and only be in my panties during each session, being
allowed to dress in between if I wanted to or not.
I had never done something like this before at all. The
night before I began and the morning I woke up, I was
having heavy doubts I could do it. I understood why He
told me to do this though...that He wanted me to learn
to discipline and control my body's reactions. The
longevity of it worried me and trying to fall asleep
the night before was difficult.
I worried about disappointing Him most, about failing
and losing control easily. I wanted to be able to get
through the next day with flying colors and I worried
that if I failed sometime in between, I would want to
not tell Him about it. Failure was on my mind before
even beginning the task at hand and I know now that
this was the wrong state of mind to be in.
I woke up just slightly before 9am. I began trying to
ready myself mentally for the day but ending up finding
that this was in vain. I didn't really know how to
focus my energy on controlling myself before the first
session and I was unsure about how difficult this was
actually going to be. I had never masturbated before
without the end result happening. I've had times where
I couldn't get there and I tried but those times were a
result of me not being able to, not me controlling
myself not to.
Just before I began my first session, I felt myself
getting excited. I was growing wet and warm and I
hadn't even touched myself yet. As 9am approached, I
began the first session. I started in the kitchen
because I had just had breakfast there. I sat my laptop
on the floor beside me and began to masturbate. I tried
to have my laptop with me everywhere throughout the day
for whenever He signed on.
It wasn't all that hard in the beginning but watching
the clock continuously, the 15 minutes to me seemed to
drag by. He told me I was not to do a half-ass thing
and touch myself lightly the entire time but to work
towards my full release, stopping myself at the brink
of orgasm every time. I had to stop a couple times this
first session but I wasn't really worried about
cumming. Being in the kitchen was sort of strange. Some
of the rooms I spent my sessions in during the day were
more comfortable than others and some just felt odd.
The kitchen itself didn't really have a feeling but the
atmosphere was sort of odd to be masturbating in. I've
only ever done that in my own room.
Picturing Him standing over me and watching during this
first time was intense. I didn't really like imagining
it most of the day. Later on when evening came I began
to get used to imagining Him there but I still didn't
like it all that much. It did make the sessions more
intense for me, but more in a frightening than exciting
way.
It's not really that I was scared of Him but being so
exposed and feeling so open, masturbating in a room of
the house I had never been in before, and not being
able to cum... it was just a mixture of different
intensities and coupled with imagining Him standing
over me watching was something I couldn't get used to.
***
After the session ended, I felt very aroused. I wanted
to spend the day productively so I decided to clean the
apartment between sessions and try and busy myself with
something else. I figured if my mind wasn't focused on
being so turned on, but instead concentrating on
something else, it would make the next session easier.
It seemed to work. Intermittently between each session,
I ended up vacuuming the entire apartment, sweeping and
mopping the kitchen floor, doing dishes, organizing my
room and putting some things into storage, going
through my closet and drawers and getting rid of some
stuff, and doing laundry.
I didn't want the day to be idle. I didn't want to sit
around watching movies or be online all day. I usually
clean when I'm bored anyway so the apartment isn't
really ever in a horrible state of disarray. Mom sort
of neglects stuff so I'm normally the one who does the
majority of keeping up the place.
Just before 10am rolled around, I started thinking that
this time was going to be more difficult. It wasn't as
if I had woken up in a state of arousal but after the
9am session, I knew it was going to be harder to
control my body. During the time after 9am, I sort of
let my body's reaction fade away from my mind and just
before 10; I didn't really feel different from when I
had begun the 9am session.
When I began masturbating a second time, it wasn't all
that bad the first few minutes. I fell back into the
routine but about halfway through things began to get
more difficult and my body was trying to react faster
than before. I had to pause more to control my body and
slow down here and there. The second time I was in the
living room and that wasn't all that bad.
I hadn't ever thought of masturbating somewhere other
than my bedroom but I didn't really mind the living
room much. I started thinking after the 10am session
how strange it was going to be to be in the bathroom
and my mother's room. I began cleaning again and at
11am, decided to just get the bathroom out of the way
next. I was eager to finish the rooms that weren't my
bedroom and eventually I just planned on being back in
my room instead of bouncing back and forth in the
apartment from place to place each session.
Between 10:15-11am, I was having trouble quieting my
mind. My pussy was wet and heated and I couldn't focus
on things as well as I had been able to the hour
before. The need for release was already starting to
overpower my mind and it was so early in the day
already. I wondered how I was going to make it to the
end, which I didn't really know when that was going to
be.
At 11am, I went into the bathroom and began the next
session and earlier than before, I found my body
wanting to lose control fast. The pauses and moments
where I slowed down were becoming more frequent. It was
getting increasingly harder session after session to
try not to cum. When those times came along, I tried to
tell myself that Master isn't allowing me to cum and
that if I do, it's not only going to be failing Him but
failing myself. Each session I was bringing myself to
the brink of orgasm and then quickly stopping myself.
Things became harder and harder each time I arrived at
the doorstep of my release.
After the 11am session, I continued cleaning the
apartment. I decided to do the living room once more
and move to my room after. At 12pm, things began to get
very difficult. I didn't want to begin again because I
was already so aroused. I wanted to touch myself during
the break I had but held off; knowing doing something
like that was only going to make the task at hand more
difficult.
I began again in the living room and just after a few
minutes I was aching to cum. I was bringing myself to
the brink of orgasm often now and stopping and having
to slow myself down frequently. Twice during that
session I was very close to losing control and I was
beginning to doubt I'd be able to control my body. It
seemed like my mind wasn't really in the driver's seat
anymore and that my body was overriding the attempts I
was making to control myself.
I somehow managed to not cum during that session and I
sort of felt my impending failure happening sooner than
later.
I decided to have lunch and stop cleaning and I started
to watch a music DVD, hoping that the mental
stimulation of that was more in depth than cleaning and
would force me to focus on something besides my
arousal. I think that helped a bit but as 1pm
approached, I was wary of continuing. Part of me
wondered if I should just skip a session or two,
thinking that He would never know.
I hate that I was thinking this way but failing and
disappointing Him seemed likely in my mind. I felt like
the task at hand was overwhelming my body. I didn't
want to do that though. I wanted to get through the day
still, knowing that even if I did skip an hour, it
would still be me that knew about it and even if I
didn't fail the task at hand, I would have still failed
myself from that and in turn, failed Him.
1pm I began my session once again, this time in my
bedroom. The environment felt more comfortable and I
was used to being in here doing this. My pussy was wet
still, even after watching the DVD and trying to focus
solely on that and push aside my arousal. My body was
winning the battle and beginning the session, things
went downhill fast. I was having a hard time touching
myself after the first couple minutes without wanting
to stop completely.
Before this and in the earlier session, I was merely
slowing down and pausing but not completely stopping
and taking the vibrator away from my body. Within the
first 5 minutes of the session, I was already so close
and I could feel myself shaking from just grinding
lightly against the toy. I kept stopping and starting
and during the middle of the session, I thought I had
brought myself to the brink yet again and when I
stopped and pulled away, my body continued moving and I
started to cum.
It was heavily intense as far as previous orgasms I've
had and my body was shaking slightly for a short while
after. I said, "I love You, Sir" as I should but I felt
horrible thanking Him. It felt as if I was thanking Him
for my failure. The orgasm I had felt amazing but
nonetheless, it wasn't something I was permitted by Him
so it was a mixture of pleasure and being upset.
After 1pm, I felt like my body had calmed down
considerably but spent the next 45 minutes unsure of
whether or not to tell Him. Deep down, I knew I had to
but deep down I really didn't want to. I wondered how
He would react and just how angry it was going to make
Him. I didn't want to think about telling Him but it
remained in my mind constantly the rest of the day and
I think the fact that I had already failed set me into
a mode where I refused to let it happen again.
I was incredibly upset with myself until 2pm rolled
around and was now dreading continuing the day. I
didn't feel like I was doing my best job and I kept
telling myself I should be striving for excellence all
day. I was questioning myself for allowing my body to
lose control, wondering how it had happened so easily
and cursing at myself for not being able to stop myself
before I came.
At 2pm, I went into my mothers' room and I think this
contributed to the session slightly. I wasn't excited
to be in there and was more uncomfortable in the
atmosphere than comfortable. I found my body to be less
reactive and didn't really have a struggle of control
during that session.
3pm was sort of vague and I'm not sure I remember the
order of what room I was in when but I know I remained
in my bedroom a great deal and was in the dining room
and living room once more here and there.
Around 4:30, He signed on and I told Him that I failed.
He gave me a new task to masturbate only at the top and
bottom of every hour for the next five hours. And He
told me that since I came at 1pm, it meant that those
sessions the 5 hours from before were lost and I had to
make them up this way. Instead I was to now masturbate
at every half hour for 15 minutes and remain nude in
between.
I had finished cleaning the apartment by this time in
between sessions so I remained in my bedroom for each
half hour session. I understood His logic and reasoning
behind the hours that I lost and making them up and was
sort of surprised that He didn't get angrier with me. I
know I had upset Him and He was disappointed in me. I
was just as angry with myself and since the time I had
failed to the time I had begun the new task, I was
incredibly upset with myself for letting Him down.
It was INCREDIBLY difficult not to cum during the new
sessions I had. I tried to focus on Him the entire time
instead of thinking about myself. I told myself that my
body was His and each time I felt the control I had
slipping away, I kept telling myself that Him
permitting me to cum was something I had not earned yet
and that I had already failed once and was not going to
fail again.
I pressed on and around 9:30, we began speaking again
after the 5 hours were over. At 10 pm, He told me I was
to still continue my earlier schedule and masturbate
during the first quarter of every hour so I did this
while watching Him. That made things increasingly more
difficult because whenever I see His eyes or His face
or Him looking at me I feel like I am being hit with a
bolt of lightning. Even if it is only I seeing Him on
His web cam, He still holds this invisible power over
me.
We spoke late into the night and just before He signed
off, something inside of me broke and I started having
some sort of meltdown that came on suddenly.
I had been having worries since before Christmas about
this relationship not being enough for me. I ended up
speaking with Him about it last night but was worried
all day about even wanting to tell Him.
I felt like not signing on at all and I felt like I was
going to upset Him if I told Him what had transpired.
Basically, I started crying uncontrollably and had some
sort of emotional outburst for a few hours afterwards
until I finally exhausted myself and fell asleep. I
hate the fact that I want more but there's a part of me
that thinks it's perfectly normal to want it all. I was
thinking about all of this when I was upset.... about
how He and Jasper both have families and are married
and how I am still alone.... even though He is with me
always, I need the tangible things that go with that
"always". Words are not enough. I hated admitting this
to Him.
I do think that living in this environment isn't
helping. Seeing my mom go on all these dates and
overnighters and spending time with men more than she
is at home, it's not easy.
I've been single for forever and I guess there's always
been a part of me that wants the whole experience. I
see couples on campus, at the mall, the movies, walking
around me all the time and I physically hurt from it. I
want what they have but I also want to keep what I have
with Him. I was at the movies over Christmas and I kept
seeing people there on dates and smiling and laughing
together and it upset me because I kept thinking, "This
is never going to happen with Him. He has a family, a
life of His own and I will never get to be able to
stand next to Him in a place like this on a holiday."
It was like a bullet train hitting me hard, that
thought.
I dislike the vulnerable ways I am sometimes. I've
always been able to be numb to things and even though
I've never really been content with being alone, it's
always been manageable. High School I didn't really
want to date. I was more attracted to older guys then
too...having a crush on my teacher instead of the boys
in desks next to me. The same with college. I hate the
type of guys that are at my school and the priorities
they have and the things they like to do and the
hardcore ways they party is just a turn off.
I sort of put myself in a shell I guess....
encapsulated away from that. He said last night that in
order to grow I need to open myself up to experiences.
Perhaps I haven't really done this enough and need to
make more of an effort with these other things I want
to find in someone. It probably doesn't help that I act
like a complete and total ass around guys to begin
with.
I'm comfortable around my brother and my dad and that's
really about it. I just need to find my way through all
of this somehow.... try to silence my worries and
listen to some other voice instead of the one in my
head that's got me feeling so inadequate.
I'm sort of fond of collecting quotes and I found one
today that I'm going to start focusing on... I think it
will help during those moments when I want to step away
from things and push me into letting go of being
afraid...the quote is simply this:
"Come to the edge," He said.
They said: "We are afraid."
"Come to the edge," He said.
They came.
He pushed them,
And they flew...
- Guillaume Apollinaire
I want more than anything, to be able to fly and be
free from my doubts, my fears, and my worries.
I want and need to continue serving Him even when I
know I may fail. I want to continue to embrace this
part of myself I've been so content to ignore for such
a long time. Above all, I love being His and it is what
I need and want still.
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This story was written as an adult fantasy. The author
does not condone the described behavior in real life.
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Kristen's collection - Directory 54