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                 K R I S T E N' S    C O L L E C T I O N
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This work is copyrighted to the author © 2007.  Please
don't remove the author information or make any changes
to this story.  All rights reserved. Thank you for your 
consideration.
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My First Time
by Recently Bold (address withheld)

***

This is the story of an event that happened to me when 
I was young. My first sexual experience was being 
touched by my grandfather. I've decided to post it as 
the anonymity makes me feel safe and the thought that 
this story might excite someone excites me in turn. 
(Mb, ped, inc, 1st-gay-expr)

***

I've been reading these stories for some time and it 
has prompted me to tell my own story. It's true and 
it's not something I've shared with many (for obvious 
reasons) but the idea of publishing it anonymously 
gives me a shiver of excitement. The truth is that this 
memory is a very erotic one despite the experience 
leaving me very conflicted at the time. At the time I 
was overwhelmed. I didn't want to stop it but I was 
afraid of acknowledging it.

I was about eight. It was the Christmas holidays. My 
mother's parents were staying with us for a few days. 
My relationship with my granny was somewhat formal but 
I was always close with Grandpa. He had taught me card 
games and chess and he talked to me like an adult, 
which I always appreciated. 

Something had happened and I was sulking. I'd gone to 
my room and had been there a while when Grandpa knocked 
on the door and cracked it open. I didn't mind seeing 
him and was actually glad that he'd cared enough to 
come see me. He came in and just casually asked me what 
I was doing. 

The conversation was light and he came and sat on the 
bed near to me. I was on the floor for some reason. 
After a little preamble he asked what was wrong and I 
told him the story (whatever it was). He was 
sympathetic and encouraging and I felt close to him and 
appreciative. 

Then he reached down and pulled me gently under my arms 
so I'd slide closer to him. I slid willingly and I was 
now between his legs. I remember feeling excited and 
nervous. I knew I was closer to him than was normal and 
I felt that he knew it too. I didn't know what it 
meant, though I suppose I may have known in some part 
of me or I wouldn't have felt excited. 

The conversation continued but it was less detailed. I 
wasn't paying much attention to it as I was intoxicated 
with the sense of experiencing a naughty secret. After 
a little while he put a hand on my shoulder and 
massaged it a little. Then he put his other hand 
through my hair and played with it. By this time 
neither of us was talking. 

I was terrified but also, definitely, excited. I 
remember that I felt very loved too. My favourite 
grandparent was showing me I was special. I don't 
recall if I was frozen or if I gave some sign that I 
was as excited as I was, but after a short time he 
slipped off the bed and was sitting behind me on the 
floor. I had to move forward a little to accommodate 
him and moving made me feel guilty and complicit and 
numb with the nervous thrill all through me.

I was wearing shorts at the time. The kind with a 
button and a zip. I don't know why as it was winter. On 
top I was wearing just a t-shirt. I could feel his body 
behind me and he wrapped his arms around me and held me 
the way a Grandpa always holds his grandson, gently and 
lovingly. But I knew this was different. I was silent 
and let him hold me. 

It seemed to last for a long time and I must have been 
tense because he reached up to my head and lent it 
against his chest. I didn't resist. I felt powerless to 
resist and I knew that I didn't want to resist. I was 
glad to feel powerless as it stopped me feeling guilty 
(though obviously those thought weren't consciously 
thought at the time). Anyway it worked. With my head 
against his chest I felt myself exhale and relax and I 
felt comfortable and safe. He sensed it and I felt him 
sense it as he relaxed too and I lay against him like 
that for some time. 

Looking back those minutes spent in my imagination were 
the most sexually charged of all as I felt comfortable 
enough to be fully aware of what was happening. I was 
being touched by my Grandfather and no-one must ever 
no. I was fully aware that this was a secret forever 
between us. Perhaps he knew I knew that as he never 
told me to keep it secret. That was the kind of respect 
he gave me that made me want to be worthy of him. Both 
in the best possible way (the person I wished to be) 
and in the naughty way too. After this night I would 
always be most thrilled when I knew I had turned him on 
unusually intensely. 

I glanced up at the door and realized that he'd locked 
it coming in. I realized that he must have known that 
he wanted this and that thought emboldened me. I 
supposed it made me feel desired and I stirred against 
him to provoke some reaction. I just moved a little as 
if to make myself more comfortable but, in relaxing 
against him again, I knew that I was telling him that I 
wanted to be where I was. When I settled in against him 
again I could feel his penis. I hadn't noticed it 
before and it was a sudden sensation when I knew it was 
there and hard and touching me through our clothes but 
I wasn't scared. I was extremely curious. 

I moved again so I could feel it move against me and 
I'm sure my intention wasn't lost on him as he began to 
explore my chest (outside my t-shirt) with his hands. 
And his hands soon moved to my hips. I became nervous 
again. I knew what happened next and I wasn't sure I 
was ready. But I couldn't say or do anything to change 
anything. I felt in his complete control. 

He moved his hand to the button on my shorts slowly to 
gauge my reaction. I gave none. Then he fumbled for a 
moment to undo them and I sucked my breath in to give 
him better movement and I knew this made me an 
accomplice. He undid the button and then the zip. He 
pulled the fly apart exposing the top of my underwear. 
I was hard and I realized he could tell by looking 
(maybe not but I thought so then and it made me feel 
exposed).

He pulled my body closer to his so I was sitting 
upright firmly against him, his erection against my 
back twitched. He pushed his hands inside my shorts and 
I lifted to give my shorts room for him. He was 
covering my dick. I was twitching too and I felt 
flushed and I was suddenly scared I might pee. I pulled 
away from him and sat, looking away a few feet from 
him. He understood I think as he stood up and helped me 
up and led me toward the bed. 

He sat me down and then lay me down. I didn't look at 
his face but I watched his hands move to my shorts and 
tug on them. I lifted my butt up and he pulled them off 
me. Then he sat next to me and pulled my underpants 
(whities) down exposing my hard little dick that stood 
up straight and throbbed. I wanted him to touch it. I 
felt about to burst and I knew I needed him to touch 
me. He paused and I looked away embarrassed at being so 
'seen'. Then he squeezed me between his thumb and 
forefinger and I felt something that I'd never felt 
before. 

I wanted him to touch me so much but I wanted to be 
alone too. I was overwhelmed with nervousness and 
longing and I felt out of control. I closed my eyes 
while he moved his finger and thumb up and down me, 
masturbating me for the first time. I let him do this 
for a little while but began to feel like I couldn't 
continue and I rolled over away from him without a 
word. 

And without a word he let go of me, covered me with the 
edge of the bed covers and left the room. And I lay 
there until my mother came upstairs. I said I was sick 
and she let me sleep without much fuss. And I lay there 
going over what had happened and feeling alternately 
guilty and thrilled until I fell asleep.

That was my first time with my Grandpa. It wasn't my 
last. Perhaps I'll share more another time.

END

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The author does not condone child abuse, this story is
meant as an erotic fantasy not real life. Anyone acting
out such scenarios in "real life" can look forward to
many unproductive years getting it up the butt by a 
fellow convict in their local prison.
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Kristen's collection - Directory 51