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Starting Over: A Love Story
by DG Hear (dghear@core.com)

***

A woman starting over in life, after the death of her 
husband, but her new boyfriend wanted to marry a 
virgin. (MF, rom)

***

Warning: Very little sex in this story. 

***

I just got through reading an erotic story on line 
about a double standard. It was about a man who cheated 
on his wife but wanted her to forgive him. But when the 
tables were turned and she had an affair he couldn't 
forgive her. Damn, I wonder how many guys felt that 
way. 

I started thinking about my views and how I felt. Here 
I was twenty seven years old, single, considered good 
looking according to my past dates. Then I realized 
that I was one of these 'Double Standard' guys the 
author was talking about.

I have dated ever since I was a teenager. I had my 
share of sex and it was good, sometimes really good. I 
really cared for a number of these women who were all 
good looking, most had decent personalities, and all 
were single or divorced. They were all hard working 
women and I almost always enjoyed their company. All my 
dates were more than one night affairs. 

I probably dated these women for months at a time. I 
know I got serious about a number of them. What 
happened? Why was I still single? Most of the women I 
dated would have made good companions. A few had 
children from their previous marriages. I do have to 
say they were all good decent woman.

Then it dawned on me. It was me. I had the double 
standard that the author talked about. Deep down I 
guess I didn't want to marry a woman who had been with 
another man. I wanted a virgin. I was willing to date 
these women and have sex with them but when it was time 
for commitment I always back away knowing they had been 
with other men. Damn! I didn't like being this person. 
I was two-faced and it began to bother me.

My parents, God bless them, were always worried about 
me not finding the right woman. They probably fixed me 
up with a half a dozen dates, everyone of them a 
knockout. They would be so happy that I was dating 
these women. After a few months we would each go our 
own way. In most cases we remained friends. I just 
couldn't tell my parents about my hang up, that I had a 
double standard. Hell, I didn't know it myself until 
after reading that stupid story.

My parents were throwing another cookout at their 
house. My sister, Nita, showed up with her clan of five 
kids and my other sister, Cindy, was there with her 
husband and two kids. Bob, my younger brother, showed 
up with his wife, Barbara, who I had dated in the past. 
She was pregnant with their second child. They seemed 
so happy together. I always felt a bit uncomfortable 
around Barbara knowing I had slept with her and she 
ended up marrying my younger brother. Luckily he didn't 
have my hang-up and ended up with a really wonderful 
woman.

I liked kids a lot. I had to since I was always 
surrounded by nieces and nephews every time we had a 
family get together. The nice part was I enjoyed the 
kids but then at the end of the night they always 
returned to the fold and I had my peace and quite. It 
worked for me. Not everyone needed to be married.

My parents said they had a surprise for me. I said. 
"Okay, mom, who is it this time?" as I smiled.

She went in the house and brought out a guest. "Do you 
remember Kathy who used to live next door?" My mom was 
really smiling.

How could I ever forget Kathy? She was my childhood 
sweetheart from about age six to age fourteen. Then her 
mom died and she and her dad moved away. I was 
remembering back when she had left. I felt so bad. I 
was just a kid who lost his girlfriend. I remembered 
how we would kiss and she would let me touch her boobs. 
We never had sex, we were just too young. 

We always said that someday we would get married and 
have a family. We always argued what we would name our 
kids. She wanted two kids, Bart and Sarah; I wanted two 
also, Jacob and Mary. I always liked biblical names. I 
had heard that she had gotten married about five years 
ago. I remember mom telling me and I took it kind of 
hard. Funny, isn't it? You have these dreams as a kid 
and they seem to stay with you forever. Like they just 
sit on the back burner of your mind. Never to be 
fulfilled.

I believe that's why when we get older we want to buy 
our kids, in my case nieces and nephews, the same toys 
and games we had when we were young. Or go to the candy 
counter and get our old favorites, maryjanes, 
blackjacks, squirrels, juju bees, I could go on and on 
but that was our childhood candy. Then you think back 
about your favorite car that you never did get or you 
wrecked it like I did mine. Always thinking someday I 
wish I could afford to buy one just like it. That's how 
I always thought about Kathy. She was always there in 
the back recesses of my mind. 

Mom brought out Kathy. It was so good to see her. It 
brought back the old memories. I hugged her, she felt 
so good. She was a little heavier than I remembered but 
was still so pretty, now beautiful. She sure filled out 
as a woman. She smiled at me and had tears in her eyes 
as did I. God, it was so good to see her again. I asked 
her about her husband.

She said, "He was killed in Iraq last year. He was a 
good man and you would have liked him. He was so much 
like the way I remembered you."

I apologized for not knowing and told her how sorry I 
was for her. 

She then introduced me to her two kids. She looked at 
me and said, "This is Jacob who is four." He held out 
his little hand for me to shake. "And this is my 
precious little girl, Mary, who is three."

My God, she picked the names I had chosen. I was ready 
to cry but did my best to hold back. Little Mary, who 
was hardly able to walk, grabbed my leg. I picked her 
up and gave her a little hug. She looked just like her 
mother. She gave me a little peck on the cheek and 
said, "Dada". Kathy said, "I'm sorry, she doesn't know 
too many words and dada is one of the first they 
learn."

I said, "Please don't apologize for that. It was nice 
to even hear her say it." We walked over to the patio 
table and just talked. I looked up at mom standing over 
by the door. She had her hands together under her chin 
as though she was praying. I could see tears of joy in 
her eyes. That was my mom. The old matchmaker.

Kathy said that after her husband had died she wasn't 
sure where to go. She remembered the old neighborhood 
and how much she loved it growing up here and decided 
to move back here to raise her children. She was able 
to buy a house about a block away next to the park we 
used to play in. She said she knew the kids would love 
it as they grew up. She stopped by to see if mom still 
lived here. She always like my mom. That was when mom 
invited her to the family cookout.

I told her I had an apartment across town. It wasn't 
homey but was good enough for a single guy. If she 
wanted, she could bring the kids over some day and we 
could use the pool. That was one of the perks of having 
the apartment. I could register her name with 
housekeeping and she could bring the kids anytime to 
swim. She said she would love to and would probably 
take me up on the offer.

My sisters both came over to see Kathy and the kids. 
They were doing their girly things, hugs and kisses and 
all. I got up and took a breather. I had to decide if I 
should ask her out. The childhood thoughts were still 
with me. I loved her as a kid and I probably could love 
her now. But she was a widow with two kids to raise. I 
wanted to date her but was afraid of maybe building up 
her hopes. What to do, what to do? I needed to think on 
this.

I know I wanted to see her again and she gave me her 
address and phone number. While we were talking mom 
came over and offered her babysitting services to Kathy 
if she ever needed one. I know mom wanted to see us 
together. I just didn't know if it would happen to the 
extent of marriage.

As I said goodnight to everyone I gave Kathy a kiss on 
the cheek. She just smiled and said how nice it was to 
see me again. Jacob came over to shake my hand good 
bye. He said. "Boys don't kiss boys". Then I picked up 
little Mary and gave her a big hug. She hugged me back 
and said "Dada" again. I smiled and handed her to 
Kathy.

I owned my own independent insurance agency. I was the 
only agent and had two office girls to help take care 
of business. One was also licensed to sell insurance so 
she was allowed to sign legal documents. Business was 
good and I made a very good living being my own boss.

Mom called me at the office and told me Kathy stopped 
by the house to thank her for inviting her to the 
party. She was glad to see everyone again, especially 
me. Mom then asked what I thought of Kathy. I told her 
she was just like I remembered, a beautiful girl and a 
great personality. 

Mom then told me that Kathy's father had died of a 
heart attack about three and a half years ago and then 
lost her husband last year. She was an only child so 
she was pretty much alone in the world. Then mom 
surprised me. She said, "Gary, please don't mislead 
her. She has had a very rough life and deserves 
better." I was stunned and asked my mother why she 
thought I would use Kathy?

"Well, Gary, you have dated for years now and we know a 
lot of the women got their hopes up and then nothing 
ever materialized. I would hate to see Kathy hurt. If 
you date her, just be totally honest with her. That's 
all I ask."

"I promise, mom, the last person I would want to hurt 
on God's green earth is Kathy." Then I had to ask mom a 
question. "Mom, did Kathy say why she named her kids 
Jacob and Mary? Did she say anything about it?"

"Well, Gary, I did say that they were good biblical 
names and Kathy said a very good friend suggested those 
names to her many years ago. Why do you ask, Gary?"

"No reason, mom. I just thought they were pretty 
names." I didn't know what to think about that. I would 
have to ask her why.

After I hung up the phone, June, my office gal who was 
married and about seven months pregnant, asked if she 
could talk with me. She came in and said she had seen 
her doctor and he told her she should stay off her feet 
more. She wanted to know if she could work part time 
during the rest of her pregnancy. She didn't want to 
leave me with no office help at all. I told her that 
would be fine, that I would find someone to help her 
with her bookkeeping and billing duties.

I was wondering if Kathy could use a job. Maybe I'd 
stop by and see if she might be interested. I sure 
would like to help her out if possible.

After work I drove straight over to Kathy's house. It 
was like I was driven from inside to go there. Kathy 
answered the door and said, "Oh, my God, I didn't know 
you were coming. Look at me, I'm a mess and the house 
is a mess."

I just blurted out and said, "It's okay, Kathy, you 
look beautiful with peanut butter and jelly on your 
blouse and your hair the way it is." It was combed but 
just kind of hanging there. Kathy looked at me but 
didn't know whether to laugh or cry. She invited me in 
and offered me something to drink. 

I told her I'd take some of whatever she was having so 
she laughed and handed me a glass of milk. She was just 
so much fun. Just like I remembered. She asked me what 
brought me to her neck of the woods and I told her the 
truth. I didn't know but seeing I was there I had a 
couple of things I would like to talk over with her.

I told her I know that it was personal but how was she 
doing financially? She said she got a death pension 
from her husband being killed and she received social 
security. Things were tight but she could survive. I 
asked her if she wanted a job. She looked up at me and 
said, "I'd love one but I'm going to be here for my 
kids. We may not have money, but I can give them love. 
That's much more important." She was right, she put her 
kids first. To bad more women didn't think that way.

I then asked, "How about a part time job that you can 
do at home? I have an office girl who can only work 
part time and I need someone who can operate a computer 
and do billing. What do you say?" 

"I know how to do billing, I did it before the kids 
were born. But, Gary, I don't own a computer. I had to 
sell it when we moved."

"Boy, you drive a hard bargain. I'll buy you a 
computer, set in up for you in your living room, so you 
can do billing for me when your kids are sleeping. Just 
don't put peanut butter on my statements," as I 
laughed. "Is it a deal?"

"Only if you answer one question honestly for me. Why 
are you really doing this, Gary?"
"Well, Kathy, I really do need the work done. But 
mostly so I can have a reason to come over and see you 
without making excuses. That's as honest as I can get."

She came over to me said, "I'll take the job and we'll 
seal it with a kiss." She put her hands around my neck 
and kissed me gently on the mouth, not once but twice. 
It felt good, really good. She backed away and said it 
had been so long since she was kissed liked that.

I had to change the subject so I asked her if she 
wanted to go out and have dinner. She said, "Not 
tonight. It would take too long to get ready and 
getting the kids ready would be a chore." Then she 
asked me if I wanted to stay and eat with her and the 
kids. She would love the company.

I said, "Wow, a home cooked meal. I only get that at 
mom's. What are we having?"

She laughed again and said, "The kids favorite. Hot 
dogs and macaroni and cheese." God, she was so much fun 
to be around. I told her I would love to have dinner 
with her and the kids. She got up and said that while 
she got it ready I could baby-sit. 

"Baby-sit. Me baby-sit. You've got to be kidding." 

She just laughed and said, "Just talk to them. They 
love people," as I sat down on the couch. After moving 
a half dozen toys and sitting on a truck little Mary 
came staggering over to me saying, "dada." I picked her 
up and hugged her. You couldn't help loving her, I 
don't care whose kid she was. She was just so darn 
sweet. She would sit in my lap and I guess she was 
talking. Mostly a bunch of mumbo jumbo but it sounded 
so cool. I just had to laugh.

Then Jacob came over and asked me if I loved his 
mother? God, out of the mouths of babes. I started to 
answer when Kathy came in and told Jacob that's not the 
kind of thing you ask guests.

He said, "But mom you said last night that you. . . " 
Kathy cut him off it mid-sentence and said to him, 
"We'll talk about it later," but she did give him a 
loving hug. What I wouldn't give to hear the rest of 
his answer. I guess it will have to wait.

We all sat around the table and ate our hot dogs and 
macaroni and cheese. It was almost like a family eating 
dinner together. After we got done eating, I told Kathy 
that I had business to attend to so I had to say my 
good-byes for the night. When I hugged and kissed 
little Mary, I got my usual dada message. Kathy laughed 
every time Mary said it. 

Then Jacob came up to me to give me his handshake. He 
looked at me and said, "Sir, what should I call you? I 
know Mary calls you dada but she doesn't know any 
better. You see our daddy got killed last year 
protecting us against the bad guys but Mary doesn't 
know it yet."

I just had to hug the young boy. He was only four and 
had already lost his father. I told him it was okay for 
friends to hug even if both were boys, and that for now 
he could call me Uncle Gary.

He looked at me and said, "I like you, Uncle Gary, and 
so does my mom." I looked up and saw Kathy with a tear 
in her eyes as she quickly turned away. I said, "Jake, 
is it alright to call you Jake?"

He said, "Sure, Uncle Gary, it sounds like a big guy's 
name."


"Well, Jake, how about me and you taking your mom and 
Mary out for dinner tomorrow? You pick the place and 
I'll pay for it."

"Wow, that's so neat." He ran up to little Mary and 
said, "Mary, me and Uncle Gary are taking you and mom 
to McDonald's for dinner tomorrow, we get to play in 
their playground." They both starting jumping up and 
down, Mary was just doing what her brother was doing. 
Kathy, on the other hand, was just laughing.

"Well, Kathy, is it a date?" I asked.

"Do I need to dress up or can I dress casually?"

I looked at her, she even looked good all rumpled. "You 
may dress casual for tomorrow's dinner but you have to 
dress up for our date Saturday. I'll ask mom to watch 
the kids." Then I left wondering what I was getting 
myself into.

The next day I went to the computer store and picked up 
a laptop for Kathy. I also got a printer so she would 
be able to do the billing. I had April, my licensed 
office help, take everything she needed over to Kathy's 
and help set it up and explain how our billing program 
worked. I figured it would be better than me trying to 
explain the office stuff.

I called my mom and asked her about watching Kathy's 
kids Saturday. She said she would love to but for me to 
remember our little talk. I called Kathy and asked, 
"Has April arrived and set up the billing system for 
you?"

She said, "April is a wiz. She had everything set up 
and is already showing me test runs on the billing 
system. She is a great instructor and you are lucky to 
have her in the office."

I agreed with Kathy, "April is a great asset to the 
agency." I was thinking of making her a full time 
licensed agent where she could do outside sales if 
necessary.

I mentioned to Kathy that mom would baby-sit Saturday 
for her and that I would see her and the kids tonight 
for our dinner at McDonalds.

When I arrived the kids were so happy. You could tell 
they didn't get to go out very often. We went in and 
Jake asked if he could order for himself? We said sure 
but the counter help wasn't overly pleased. We all got 
our food and sat down. Kathy and I actually talked 
about her business duties while the kids were busy 
playing on the playground equipment. When we got back 
to the house Jake said, "Thank you, Uncle Gary, that 
was really fun. Can we do it again? Can we, huh?"

I said, "Sure, little buddy, we can do it lots of 
times." Then he hugged me. Of course little Mary saw 
him hug me and she always did what her brother did so 
she hugged me also. I gave Kathy a peck on the lips and 
then said my good-byes for the night.

I arrived Saturday to pick Kathy up. She had already 
taken the kids to mom's house. She looked fantastic. 
She only stood around 5'1". I have no idea what she 
weighed. She had probably 36B boobs. I really don't 
know much about size. All I knew was in my eyes she was 
one beautiful creature. She asked me for one favor 
before we left. She asked me if I would kiss her one 
time and then hold her for at least thirty seconds. I 
thought it a bit odd but would never turn it down.

She kissed me passionately but only one time. Then I 
held her for much longer then a minute. She was 
shuddering and I held her till she felt calm again. She 
said she wanted to do that ever since she saw me at 
mom's. It was just something she needed to do. I told 
her anytime she needed to be kissed or hugged to please 
give me a call. I knew there was more to it and would 
probably find out what it was eventually.

We went out and had a great time. We had an elegant 
dinner at one of the best restaurants where I could get 
reservations. We went into the lounge and had wine to 
drink while listening to the music. We danced a couple 
of slow dances as I held her close. God, I could hold 
her forever.

She said she needed to talk to me when we got back to 
the house. She looked a little nervous but said it was 
extremely important to her. We stopped by mom's and 
picked up two sleeping little children. We laid them 
gently on the back seat and I drove everyone home. 
After putting the children to bed and changing into 
something more comfortable. Kathy came back out to talk 
to me. More comfortable meant pajamas and a robe, but 
she even looked good to me in that.

As we sat on the couch talking, things became more 
serious. I kissed her gently and she kissed me back. I 
wanted to hold her. She told me, "We need to talk. 
Things are beginning to get serious between us but you 
need to know things about me and how I feel."

She looked at me teary-eyed and said, "Please don't 
interrupt me because it has taken a lot of courage for 
me to tell you what I'm about to say."

I was very nervous, I had no idea what to expect. My 
feelings for her were very strong so I held her hands 
in mine and listened to her story.

She began, "As you know after my mother died, dad and I 
moved away. I had a lot of trouble adjusting and was 
always down in the dumps. I began to gain weight. I was 
a pretty heavy teenager so I really wasn't into the 
dating scene. I think the only guys that I dated just 
wanted in my pants. It didn't happen. I couldn't just 
have sex. That wasn't part of my makeup, poor or not. I 
always thought of you and the talks we had when we were 
kids. About how we were going to save ourselves for 
each other, get married and have a family."

"After graduating from high school, I went to a 
community college. I started feeling better about 
myself and joined a weight class and started losing 
weight. I found that my eating was caused by my 
depression. I started a new job and was making a life 
for myself and dad. I still lived at home at the time. 
Dad wasn't in the best of health and we lived on his 
disability checks and my income from working at the 
office."

She stopped for a minute just to look and see if I was 
really listening. I knew this was important to her.

She continued, "One day as I was leaving the building 
and headed to the parking lot, I was attacked. Two men 
tried to rape me. They had most of my clothes torn 
off," she began to cry," and were beating on me. I was 
screaming, kicking and yelling as I was fighting back. 
That's when Don, who became my future husband, came to 
my rescue. It wasn't as much him beating them up as 
them being caught in the act. My screaming attracted 
attention. 

Don was the first one there. The would-be rapists saw 
him and ran. The police caught them and they were 
eventually tried for attempted rape and are now 
incarcerated. Don took off his jacket and covered me. 
He stayed until the paramedics arrived. I was taken to 
the hospital and was taken care of and then released."

She stopped for a moment and got a glass of water 
before continuing. "Don came by the hospital to see if 
I was alright. That is really the first time I met him. 
I thanked him for being there and for helping me in the 
garage situation. I don't know what I would have done 
if he didn't show up. I almost felt an obligation to 
him. He worked in the recruiting office for the 
military and was in the same building that my office 
was in. 

We began dating. He was a good man. He did take my 
virginity. Shortly after, he asked me to marry him. I 
cared for him a lot, in a sense I loved him. Not in an 
exciting man-of-my-dreams way. But as a caring loving 
individual."

"We got married and about ten months later Jacob was 
born. Yes, I named him Jacob. Believe it or not it was 
in honor of you. Don made me laugh and of course he is 
the father of my two kids. For that I will always 
remember him. He was a good man and I vowed always to 
be faithful to him. And I have been. 

He is the only man I have ever been with. I was about 
seven months pregnant with Mary, when he was sent 
overseas. He had only seen Jacob as a baby and of 
course never had a chance to see his daughter. He was 
reassigned for an extra year and due to be released 
within weeks of his death." 

Kathy started crying. I held her till she could regain 
her composure. "Don lived in an orphanage before being 
on his own. I guess that's one of the things that 
brought us together. We were just two people pretty 
much alone in this world. Dad died while I was pregnant 
with Mary. Thank God that was a couple of months before 
Don was assigned overseas. 

I had a shoulder to lean on during that time. Then 
after Don left for Iraqi it was only his letters that 
held everything together. Then one day I got the 
official letter that Don was killed in action. I was 
devastated. In my short life I had lost my mother, 
father, and husband. I had two babies to worry about. I 
didn't know what to do. I was lost. That's when I 
decided to just ?tart Over' from scratch with my two 
babies. I was going back to where my life started and 
hope for the best. That's why we are here today."

Kathy looked at me with tears in her eyes. "Gary, I 
still have feelings for you. I don't know why. Maybe 
because you were the one constant in my early life. The 
one person who was there for me. Maybe it's something 
deep in my mind. I don't know what it is. I want to be 
with you. I know you like me. I'm not blind. But now 
there is more to it. My little ones mean more to me 
than anything. I don't want to see them hurt. They 
deserve a chance in life. I'm going to see that they 
get it. The only way I will carry on a relationship 
with you is if you think there is a chance for a future 
for us. That's me, Jake and Mary. We're a package now 
and it's going to stay that way."

God, she was honest and put it right out there. How do 
I respond?

Wow, I never expected all that. Now I know she was 
waiting for a response. I just decided to tell her the 
truth. I didn't want to lie to her. So I began:

"Kathy, I have very strong feelings toward you also. 
But I have a problem that I have never told anyone. I'm 
going to tell you and there's a good chance that it 
might end our relationship. I have a problem that I 
recently found out. The reason I never married is that 
I wanted a woman who has never been with another man"

"What? I don't understand, Gary, you want to marry a 
virgin? You're twenty-seven years old. Are you 
expecting to start dating teenagers? My God, Gary, 
you've been dating women for at least ten years or 
more. I know you must have had sex with them."

This wasn't going the way I planned but I had to 
continue. "Kathy, I think that's why I never married. 
I've been serious with a number of women but never 
committed myself to them. I don't know why I have this 
problem but I do. I have never had problems dating, 
just committing myself to someone."

"Let me get this straight, Gary. Using me as an 
example, I would be good enough to have sex with but 
not to marry. Is that what you're trying to tell me? 
All because I had sex with my husband."

"Not you, Kathy. The women I've dated. I guess I've 
used a double standard. I don't want to be this way. 
You see I really care for you and I'm just trying to be 
honest with you. God, I really care for you. I just 
thought you should know."

"Gary, here's something you should know. I want to stay 
good friends with you. My kids love you and so do I. I 
will not have sex with you. I've gone a year and I 
could go longer until I find the man that wants me for 
who I am. We can date and enjoy each other's company if 
you want to. If you haven't got your mind straight by 
News Year's Day, I will just consider us good friends 
and move on with my life. Life is too short to wait for 
what might have been. I found that out losing my 
husband."

Did I understand her correctly? I have two months to 
get my act together or lose her. I just looked at her 
as I left and said, "Kathy, you must understand that 
it's me, not you." With that said I left the house.

For the next few weeks I tried to figure out my problem 
and where it came from. I didn't see Kathy as often. 
Maybe just once or twice a week. She was always smiling 
and treating me as though nothing had happened. She let 
me kiss her but that was it. I was becoming frustrated. 
I didn't want to date anyone else. I wanted Kathy. 
Damn, damn, damn, I was ready to go see a doctor. Maybe 
even a shrink.

Mom was having a huge Thanksgiving feast. Every 
relative I had in the area was going to be there. Mom 
made sure I invited Kathy and the kids. Every relative 
I know would see us together. Was my mom setting me up? 
I had to talk to my mom before Thanksgiving. I had to 
tell her my problem. The last thing I wanted was to 
hurt Kathy in any way, shape or form. I knew I was 
falling totally in love with her and wanted to be able 
to commit to her before losing her.

About two days before Thanksgiving I stopped by to see 
my mom and have a talk with her. I wanted her to 
understand that Kathy and I might not be together 
forever. Mom looked at me and said she didn't 
understand. She knew Kathy loved me and that she was 
pretty sure I loved Kathy. So what was the problem.

I just told her that when I had dated other women and 
had sexual relations with them I always felt I was 
being compared to their other lovers. I was always 
afraid that I might not meet up to their other lovers' 
standards. I don't know if it was true or not but 
that's how I felt. I knew that sometimes I compared the 
different women I was with so I was sure the women did 
the same. I can't spend the rest of my life wondering 
if Kathy was comparing me to someone else.

"Is that your problem, Gary? You don't think you're 
good enough. You don't know if you're man enough for 
any one woman? Oh, God, son, I wish you would have told 
me this long ago. I think I know where this problem 
originated. At Thanksgiving dinner, pull your Uncle 
Frank aside and talk to him."

As far as Kathy working for me, she was great. She 
reported directly to April. I didn't want the 
responsibility of being her direct boss. I wouldn't 
know how to handle her. April said Kathy picked up on 
the billing and was a big help. She'll be able to 
handle it all when June takes her maternity leave.

April also looked at me and said, "It's none of my 
business, boss, but the woman is madly in love with you 
and her kids are as well behaved as any kids I've ever 
seen. She would be quite a catch for someone," as she 
looked at me.

The family ended up renting a hall for Thanksgiving 
dinner. We must have had sixty or more people. I 
arrived with Kathy and the kids. We were the center of 
attention. The family rumor mill was flying. Everyone 
ran up to meet Kathy. They wanted her to feel at home. 
Many remembered her as the little kid I use to play 
with. Some of the divorced and single guys wanted to 
know if we were a couple. Kathy just looked at them and 
then at me and said we are for now and smiled.

Damn, that kind of hurt. I went looking for Uncle 
Frank. I found him and he said, "Your new girlfriend 
sure is pretty. I heard through the grapevine that she 
is going to be the one to tame you Is that true?"

I told him, "I need to talk to you alone and I could 
answer your question." We went into a side room of the 
hall and had a little talk. 

I told him about the problem of marrying a woman who 
was not a virgin and didn't know why. 

He looked at me and said, "Oh, my God, it came home to 
roost. I'm afraid your thinking is all my fault. Please 
let me explain. God, I'm so sorry."

"When you were just a little lad, maybe nine or ten 
years old you spent a lot of time at my house. Your 
Aunt Rose whom I divorced maybe fifteen years ago would 
always complain about my lovemaking. She had many 
sexual partners before we met. Every time we had sex 
she would complain about how good this lover was, how 
much bigger that one was, how another was always able 
to last longer. I never thought about you being in 
another room of the house sleeping. Then one day you 
asked me about all the things you heard over and over 
again. I told you that if you ever get married make 
sure it's to a virgin. Have all the sex you want in 
your life when you're old enough. But when it's time to 
marry, make sure she has never had another man and you 
will never have the problems I've had."

"Uncle Frank, it's hard for me to believe it was you 
telling me that so many years ago that has caused my 
problem. It's got to be more than that?"

"Gary, through the years you reaffirmed that you wanted 
a woman that was yours only. Every time you got serious 
about a woman you always talked about her past. I do 
believe your mind retained our conversation about 
sexual thoughts and you rejected these women. The 
problem is now you found a woman that you truly love. 
You fell in love with her before your mind could reject 
her. Now you have an internal problem. Do you think she 
is the type of woman who would throw her past love life 
up to you? Do you believe she really loves you? Do you 
know if you truly love her? If you can answer these 
questions, then I think you can make the ultimate 
decision."

I thanked my Uncle Frank for the discussion. I didn't 
know if it was true or a bunch of bunk. I just stood 
back and watched Kathy. Her kids were busy playing with 
all the other kids there. Mom had a few of the 
teenagers watch all the kids. Kathy jumped in like part 
of the family helping put the finishing touches on the 
Thanksgiving feast. She fit in so perfectly. She looked 
up at me and just smiled. God, I had to marry this 
girl. I knew it in my heart, that's where it really 
counts.

Thanksgiving passed and the Christmas Holiday began. I 
stopped by and asked Kathy if she wanted to go 
Christmas shopping. Something I loathed in the past. 
But with her it was fun. We bought the kids the needed 
clothes and then started in on the toys. We had lunch 
and listened to the sound of Christmas all around us. 
This Christmas just seemed magical to me. One that I 
looked forward to. Was it because I had Kathy and the 
kids to share it with?

Kathy told me she wasn't going to spoil the kids with 
tons of toys. She limited them to five toys each. She 
said even with the extra money she made doing the 
insurance billing she still had to keep a close watch 
on her finances. I mentioned to Kathy that I wanted to 
buy the kids something just from me. I picked out a 
bike for Jake. His first bike, it made me feel good. 
What to get little Mary was a lot harder to figure out. 
After all she was only three. I decided on a big wheels 
tricycle. If she saw Jake riding his bike, she would 
need something to ride also. She followed her big 
brother everywhere.

One day I stopped by and told Kathy to hurry up and get 
ready. I wanted to take the kids to see Santa Claus. We 
stood there in the mall and watched Jake talk to Santa. 
The old guy looked at Kathy and I like we were from 
outer space and then he lifted up little Mary on his 
lap. We heard her say dada then blah, blah, blah. We 
had to laugh. They both got their pictures taken with 
Santa and then we headed over to - you guessed it - 
McDonald's for dinner.

I mentioned to Kathy that one of our big insurance 
companies that we represent asked us to come to their 
company Christmas party. April and her husband were 
going. June said she would attend with her husband but 
depending on how her future baby acted would determine 
how long she stayed. Mary said, "I'd love to be your 
date. Who knows, it might be our last."

That shook me up a bit. Kathy was staying with her 
schedule. Less then a month to decide my future.

Mom said she would be glad to take the kids for the 
night when we attend the Christmas party. The kids 
would be sleeping and Kathy could pick them up the next 
morning. Mom said, "I just love Jake and Mary and I 
think as much of them as I do my own grandchildren. No 
matter what happens between Kathy and you, she will 
always have an open house as far as the kids are 
concerned. Did you have your talk with Uncle Frank?"

I just told her yes. I still didn't know what to think 
of that conversation.

I stopped by to pick Kathy up for the party. Damn, was 
she ever beautiful. I can't even explain how good she 
looked to me. She was wearing a low cut blue dress 
showing enough boob to be sexy but not slutty. It came 
down maybe five inches above her knees. When I looked 
at her the only thing I could think of was I wanted 
her. I wanted to make love to her and told her so. She 
of course just smiled and kissed me gently as we headed 
to the party. We took a cab just in case we drank too 
much.

The party was fun, no business, just fun. Alice and 
June's husbands were really nice guys. We all danced 
except for June who was afraid of having to deliver the 
baby on the dance floor. She was due any day now. Kathy 
danced with both husbands but turned down offers by 
many of the other men at the party. She was in a sly 
way letting me know that she wouldn't have problems 
finding suitors. We both drank quite a bit and were 
feeling pretty good. I held her while we danced, 
inhaling the fragrance of her perfume. God, her scent 
was just getting to me.

We left the party and arrived at her house. She noticed 
I sent the cab away but didn't say anything. As we 
entered her house I took her in my arms and kissed her. 
I mean really kissed her and she kissed me back. I told 
her how beautiful she was and how much I needed her. 
She just melted in my arms. She felt so good. We walked 
into the bedroom and I slowly removed her clothes. All 
but her panties and bra. It's so much sexier when 
removing them in bed. I then quickly removed my 
clothes, all but my briefs.

I lay in bed next to her kissing her, hugging her, 
making love to her. I removed her bra and gently sucked 
on her nipples as she made low breathing noises. I slid 
my hand down inside her panties resting my hand on her 
soft brown mound and just gently rubbed her. I kissed 
her some more while continuing to rub her mound. I 
looked at her face saying, "I want you, I need you, I 
love you."

I got up and slid her panties down. She lifted her butt 
to help me. I slowly pulled them down her legs and then 
I mounted her. At first I was gentle, slowly slipping 
my penis into her moist, very hot vagina. It was so hot 
I was ready to cum almost instantly. I did my best to 
hold back as I used a slow in and out motion until I 
could feel her vagina tighten around my penis. I 
exploded into her. I felt her orgasm at the same time. 
That was the only time we did it that night. I crawled 
up next to her, put my arms around her and we both went 
to sleep. It was the best sleep I had in months.

When I awoke the next morning I was alone in the bed. 
Now I was worried. Why did we make love? Did we have 
too much to drink? How will she react when I face her? 
Should I apologize?

I got out of bed, slipped on my briefs, undershirt and 
pants and went out to face the music. There was Kathy 
sitting there in her pajamas sipping a cup of coffee. I 
spoke first saying how sorry I was for taking advantage 
of her the night before. She looked up at me and said, 
"You didn't take advantage of me, Gary. I wanted you as 
much as you wanted me. Besides being in love with you, 
I did it for another reason."

"What reason, Kathy?"

"Who did you think about while we were making love?"

"My God, Kathy, what a stupid question? You, of course, 
only you."

"Well, Gary, who do you think I was thinking of while 
we were making love?"

"Me, of course, you called out my name over and over."

"That's my point exactly, Gary. When two people are in 
love like we are, there is only one person we think 
about while making love: each other. I wanted you to 
know I understand your fear. But you needed to know 
that it is you I love and only you." I finally 
understood. When true love hits there is only one 
person you worry about during love making.

Kathy took me home to my apartment and then picked up 
her kids at mom's.

The next few days flew by. I didn't get a chance to see 
much of Kathy that week due to business and the 
holidays. Then June called and said she went into 
labor.

April called Kathy and asked, "Would you be able to 
take on some additional work due to June's maternity 
leave?"

Kathy said, "I'll do all I can to help out. Just bring 
me the work and I'll see it gets done."

I called my mom and asked a bunch of favors from her. I 
told her I did not want anything to get back to Kathy. 
I gave her a list of what I needed and told her to 
contact the rest of the family but just make sure it 
doesn't get back to Kathy. Even if it took not talking 
to her for a week.

Mom promised me she would get it done. Once mom made a 
promise you could count on her. I told her Kathy and 
the kids would be over on Christmas and then there 
would not be any more secrets.

I called Kathy and asked if I could spend Christmas Eve 
and Christmas Day with her and the kids? I wanted to 
see the joy in her family's eyes.

Kathy said, "Of course you can be here. It wouldn't be 
the same without you. Your mom invited us all over for 
Christmas dinner and your brother and sisters will be 
there with their families."

I went over to Kathy's house on Christmas Eve. It 
reminded me of when I was a kid and how much fun 
Christmas was. I haven't had that feeling for a long, 
long time. Just watching the kids get excited and 
putting cookies out for Santa and making sure there was 
sugar for the reindeer was fun. There was holiday music 
and such a wonderful feeling in the air. The Christmas 
tree with all the presents under it. I had forgotten 
how much fun it really was. But watching Kathy with the 
kids brought joy to my heart. I was so glad I was a 
part of it.

Kathy put the kids to bed and came back and sat on the 
couch with me. She brought out a pillow and some 
blankets and handed them to me. She said, "You have to 
sleep on the couch. My kids aren't going to get up and 
find a man who is not my husband in my bed. But I will 
sit out here and neck with you for awhile," as she 
smiled at me.

We woke up Christmas morning, both of us asleep on the 
couch. We didn't do anything but cuddle and hold each 
other. It was funny when you think about it. I got up 
and made coffee as Kathy went to wake the little ones. 
They jumped out of bed and ran in the living room. Jake 
yelling "Santa was here, Santa was here. Look, mom, he 
ate the cookies and drank his milk. You were right, 
mom, Santa does like milk." Little Mary was running 
around behind her brother.

They both ran to the tree to see the extra presents 
that weren't there the night before. God, what a 
beautiful sight, watching the happiness on Kathy's face 
and watching the kids. Life doesn't get any better than 
that, or does it?

The kids started opening presents. Of course they liked 
the toys more than the clothes. When they opened their 
bicycle and big wheels, they wanted to ride them right 
then in the house. Kathy told them, "Later you can take 
them outside and ride them. Uncle Gary will watch you," 
as she smiled at me.

Kathy got me some nice things: shirts, a new watch and 
a few other things. I got her some perfume, the kind I 
thought she smelled so good in. I also got her a couple 
of outfits I had my sister pick out. Then I gave her a 
big box. Each time she unwrapped it the box got 
smaller. 

The present was down to the size of a shoe box. She 
looked up at me as the present got smaller and smaller 
until she got down to one the size of a jewelry box. As 
it got smaller, I saw tears well up in her eyes. She 
knew what was coming next, a tiny little box that only 
a ring would fit in. She opened up the tiny box and saw 
an engagement ring and started crying. I got down on 
one knee and said, "Kathy, will you marry me and make 
an honest man of me?"

She jumped up, put her arms around my neck and said, "I 
was afraid you would never ask." As she was crying she 
spoke the words, "Yes, yes, a thousands times yes, I 
will marry you."

We cleaned up some of the mess and Kathy dressed the 
kids as I took them outside to watch them ride their 
bike and big wheel, watching them smile every time they 
went by. Kathy finished straightening the Christmas 
mess up and told the kids to come in and have 
breakfast. 

I told Kathy that I had a few things to do and I would 
be by to pick her up and take her to mom's this 
afternoon. Before I left I hugged the kids and told 
them I loved them. Jake hugged me and said he knew I 
loved his mom, he just knew it. I had to hug him again 
and said, "I love you and Mary too, Jake." Then I 
squeezed little Mary, kissed her on the cheek and went 
to take care of business.

I stopped by mom's before going over to pick up Kathy 
and the kids. I asked her if everything was ready. 

She asked me, "What was Kathy's answer?" 

I just nodded my head yes and mom said, "Then 
everything is in order."

I went over to pick up Kathy and the kids. They were 
all dressed in their new duds. I kissed her the minute 
I walked in the door. That would be something I 
intended to do the rest of my life.

By the time we got back to mom's, most of the family 
was there. Kathy showing everyone her ring. Of course I 
got harassed by everyone but that was okay, it was 
worth it. My brother finally asked Kathy when the 
wedding would be.

Kathy looked at me and then said, "I don't know. 
Everything just happened so quick we haven't had time 
to discuss it."

Mom said, "Not to change the subject, Kathy, but we 
rented a hall for a big New Year's Eve bash. Will you 
be able to attend it with Gary? It's very important to 
him."

"Well, of course I'll attend it with him. But why is it 
so important to him?"

Mom handed Kathy an invitation that read:


Please attend our New Year's Eve bash. It will be the 
party of the year. At 12:05 A.M. there will be a 
wedding of Gary Adams and Kathy Mason. The reception 
will continue after the wedding. Everyone is invited to 
come and enjoy the festivities. There is no charge. 
Please don't bring presents. Just come and join us in 
this happy union. It's been a long time coming.

Sincerely
The Adams Family


Kathy read the invitation, looked up at me, started 
crying and ran to me and kissed and hugged me. "I love 
you," she said.

I said, "You told me that New Year's Day is my deadline 
and I am not going to make any mistakes. I want to 
spend the rest of my life with you."

Jake came up to us and asked, "Does that mean he'll be 
my daddy? 

Kathy knelt down and said, "Jake, you and Mary will 
always have two daddies. One daddy died defending our 
country and we must always remember him. Uncle Gary 
will be your second daddy. You will have to listen to 
everything he says. You will obey him just like you do 
mommy. He loves you very much and will always be there 
for you."

"Do I call him daddy or Uncle Gary?"

I looked down at Jake and then knelt down next to 
Kathy. "Jake, you call me what ever you feel most 
comfortable with" Then little Mary came over to me, put 
her little arms around my neck and said, "Dada." I 
squeezed her as Jake looked on. He said, "You're right, 
Mary, daddy it is." We all had to laugh.

My sister Nita asked Jake how Christmas went. Jake 
said, "It was great. I got all kinds of wonderful toys 
and Uncle Gary - I mean dad - got me a bike. He got 
Mary a big wheel and we already rode them this 
morning." 

Kathy looked at Jake and asked him if he remembers when 
we took him to meet Santa. He said, "Yeah, mom, he gave 
me my special present."

"What present was that, Jake."

"I told him I wanted Uncle Gary to be mine and Mary's 
dad and that my mom loved him and we did too. So please 
arrange it if he could. And he did mom, Santa did it."

Kathy looked at me and we both had to laugh. No wonder 
Santa looked at us so strangely.

Epilog:

Well, life went on. We had over 200 people attend our 
New Year's party/wedding. It couldn't have been better. 
Kathy looked like an angel and, in my book, she was. I 
couldn't love my two kids more. I moved into the little 
house by the park. We could afford a bigger place but 
this is what Kathy wanted. We spend most of our 
evening's home together. We do make it to McDonalds at 
least once a week. Jake's favorite restaurant.

June had her baby, a cute little baby boy, her second 
child. She will be off for a few months. When she 
starts back it will only be part time. She wants to 
spend more time at home with her kids. I don't blame 
her.

I gave April a big raise and made her a full time 
agent. That way I could take more time off to be with 
the family.

Everyone wanted to know about our honeymoon. It was 
fantastic. We took the kids and went to Disney World. 
We got two rooms with connecting doors. We ran the kids 
everywhere all day and then the night belonged to us. 
We took full advantage of it.

I don't know to this day if uncle Frank told me the 
truth or whether mom put him up to it. But right now I 
don't care. I now have my childhood sweetheart and I 
can guarantee life couldn't be better.

Hope you enjoyed my story.
DG Hear

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
It's okay to *READ* stories about unprotected sex with
others outside a monogamous relationship. But it isn't
okay to *HAVE* unprotected sex with people other than
a trusted partner. You only have one body per lifetime,
so take good care of it!
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Kristen's collection - Directory 39