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 Archive name: judybro.txt (mm, mf, inc?)
 Authors name: Anonymous
 Story title : Judy's Brother

 ------------------------------------------------------
 -= This work is copyrighted to the author © 1996. =-
 Please do not remove the author information or make
 any changes to this story. You may post freely to non-
 commercial "free" sites, or in the "free" area of
 commercial sites. Thank you for your consideration.
 ------------------------------------------------------

 I know that Judy can be a pain in the ass. Hell, I
 grew up with her. But that's not why it happened. Paul
 and I met in a bathroom, I'm almost ashamed to admit.
 I was, well, young. He was older, but we went to the
 same school.

 I had just had a fight with Judy..like most younger
 brothers do with their older sisters. My folks just
 let us fight. To this day, I remember hearing my
 father tell Mom, "let them work it out". So I knew
 I couldn't count on them to help me out.

 She picked on me for being, living, breathing.....and
 it was a shame. Because, I liked her. She was older,
 wiser, had friends, went out on dates, was a big deal
 in high school.

 I was a freshman, awkward, kind of brainy, and a nerd.
 Judy wasn't the only one who called me that either.

 Many years later, I can smile about it, because this
 nerd is quite wealthy, happy, successful and pretty
 well respected in the computer world. And even Judy is
 proud of me. But back then, she called me the cold
 sore in her life.

 I guess I was in my second year of high school. You
 know how those years are. Your crotch keeps demanding
 attention..and you gladly give it all the attention
 you can give...cause it feels fucking great!

 And it's confusing too. Even squash got me excited by
 then. And those dreams....wow. I'd wake up at three
 o'clock in the morning, sweaty, out of breath and
 realizing I had screamed or yelled out a name in the
 middle of the night.

 Then I worried who heard me...let alone what name I
 called out. There was Bradley, a jock in my gym class.
 His body had developed well beyond his years and I
 thought he was amazing...like those bodies I saw in
 muscle magazines.

 Dad was thrilled I took an interest in body building
 even though I stayed pretty srawny. It was years later
 he probably realized why. Anyway, Judy and I had a
 screaming match that pissed me off and hurt me. I did
 like her...admired her..and wished she wanted me
 around. 

 But Judy didn't want me. She even wished I had never
 been born. To this day, I remember her saying it. And
 even though I know she was just going through a female
 hormonal tornado at the time, it still hurts remember-
 ing her telling me that.

 We fought about something, I dont' know what. My
 parents ignored my pleas for intervention and I was
 pissed off at them too. So I stormed out of the house,
 flush with anger.

 The cool night helped...and the more I walked away
 from where Judy was, the more I calmed down.

 The night air was cool but with wisps of warm air
 mixed. It was summer in Chicago..a confusing time for
 weather as well as for me. There were several parks
 along the lake and I wandered through one of them. The
 sight of the cinderblock house in the center of nowhere
 beckoned me. It would be better then taking a leak by
 a tree I thought.

 The stench was horrible. But I had to use the john and
 emptied my bladder. Paul, I didn't know his name at
 the time, suddenly appeared and stood in front of the
 urinal beside me. He had ignored the many others there.
 We were alone.

 "You ok?" he asked and then added "you look angry".
 Hell I had to talk to someone, and I spilled my guts
 to him. He sympathised and listened. He told me I was
 right, I had a right to be pissed off, that my sister
 must be a bitch.

 And then he put his hands on my shoulder.
 
 I shuddered. Nobody had ever comforted me that way. I
 cried. And I was in his arms, feeling foolish but
 crying nevertheless. I cried because my sister didn't
 love me the way I loved her, my parents didn't seem
 to care what was going on, my fears about being queer
 complicated things and everything else that a teenager
 goes through.

 He kissed me on the cheek and then my mouth. And I was
 suddenly kissing like I saw men and women do on tele-
 vision. My mind raced, rationalized, questioned and
 tried to label what we were doing.

 But my gut was on fire, my dick was hard, my lips
 hungry and my body thrilled. Paul's hands were inside
 my shirt and pants. Mine were inside his. We moved to
 the back stall and with our shirts and pants wide
 opened, we fumbled until we found ways to give each
 other pleasure.

 I ran away, pulling my pants up and buttoning my shirt
 so my buttons didn't allign with my button holes. I
 wasn't ashamed, I was scared. My underwear was wet with
 the sperm Paul and I had expelled.

 I loved it..but didn't know what it was. I finally
 slept..and dreamed of other boys I knew and Paul's
 face was now a part of these dreams.

 Judy's dates rarely came into the house. But one night
 he did. And I turned so red that even my folks comment-
 ed on it.

 Paul was standing there in a tuxedo holding the
 obligatory flowers as he waited for Judy to make her
 grand entrance down the stairs. It was their prom. And
 I felt like the jilted lover.

 Paul, too was stunned. He ignored me, not even looking
 in my direction after our seeing each other.

 He stumbled as he and Judy left. My Dad laughed and
 talked about teenagers, proms and other stuff that
 made Mom laugh too.

 But in my mind was the sight of an almost naked Paul,
 introducing me to the world I feared I was a part of.

 If you think that was horrible, imagine how I felt
 standing at their wedding years later.

 I was a senior by then and Judy was pregnant. Paul and
 she were in college but obviously had been spending
 nights together.

 We tried to act like everything was normal..but my
 folks were ashamed. It was back when getting pregnant
 wasn't considered the right thing to do. I handed Paul
 the ring. By then he had become friendly with me..even
 calling me little brother. We never spoke of our
 meeting years before.

 I was civil but jealous.

 Judy's pregnacy resulted in so many fights with Paul
 that he would leave the apartment they shared and come
 to our house to talk to the folks.

 One night, there was only me. And Paul came to talk
 to me. As I said, I know that Judy can be a pain in
 the ass. Hell, I grew up with her.

 That was when I told Paul that after a fight with Judy
 I had gone to the park. He remembered and we laughed a
 bit. His hand on my leg seemed to start the process of
 us both taking up where we had left off.

 Naked, sweaty and sharing our frustrations over Judy,
 our need for each other and the raging hormones we
 spent the night together in my room. In the same bed
 where I had fantasized about so many boys and men, I
 had fulfilled fantasies that men, both straight and
 gay, have had for centuries. My folks knocked on the
 door and I yelled out that Paul was crashing for the
 night.

 They ignored the noises we made and we made love all
 night. Carnius was the name they gave their boy. Paul
 demanded that I be the god father despite Judy's
 objections.

 Then Judy found out.

 But instead of yelling, calling me names or stabbing
 me with a knife, she sat on my bed and said she had
 always known.

 I didn't know if she meant Paul or me at the time. I
 cried and apologized.......probalby for the years of
 arguments...as well as for sleeping with her husband.

 She and I became close....a common enemy, our parents
 finding out about our decandent existance seemed to
 make us the bother/sister companions our parents had
 always hoped we'd be.

 They were even shocked when I moved in with Paul and
 Judy so I could go to the same college.

 I baby-sat my godson, I went shopping with my sister
 and slept with my brother in law.

 OK, it was odd...maybe even sick..but the four of us
 got through a few years with this relationship without
 anyone finding out.

 They graduated and went on to graduate schools. That
 was lucky for me, because I had a place to live and a
 man to fuck.

 And I even had the sister I had always wanted.

 That was years ago.

 I remember it so well because last week I sat on a
 metal chair watching my godson graduate from high
 school. Carnius looked so young up there in his
 black robe and smiling among his just as young friends.
 Judy, sitting beside me was crying...like most mothers
 do. Her divorced husband, Paul was there too and just
 as proud.

 Andy, my lover was with me still uneasy about the
 whole thing. He still calls it incest..but it wasn't
 of course.

 Paul and I kissed hello in front of the hundred
 teenagers and Judy laughed. Andy blushed and Carnius
 turned away as if he didnt' know us.

 Judy and I talk daily....she bitches about men and I
 bitch about Andy. 

 Paul? We dont' talk about him much. He's married with
 two kids and living two thousand miles away.

 And during one drunken phone call, he admitted he's
 been hanging out at the bathroom in the park again.

 But thanks to Paul, I have my sister...and in a way
 I have Andy too. And I have memories.
 ______________________________________________________
 Kristen's collection - Directory 7