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Archive name: barneys.txt (MMF, voy, family)
Authors name: Laura Wood (laurabwood@yahoo.com)
Story title : Barney's Beginnings
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Barney's Beginnings (MMF, voy)
Laura Wood (laurabwood@yahoo.com)
Two years ago at the Calgary Stampede I saw a
family of hicks who had personality written all
over them. He was definitely a caring (very) sheep
farmer. She spread her charms all over the
district and the young guy; Barney was looked like
a young Homer Simpson with three legs! I imagined
their lifestyle as wickedly as I could...
***
M'names Bawnie, thass spelt B-a-r-n sumthin. I
live up in Alberta where it's cold wif Mom n Pa.
We is sheep farmers, least Pa is, I'm just a kid
of 16 an Mom, she ain't a sheep farmer, she does
cookin an shit like that. I got a new puter so I
kin make words on the screen thing. Its great, it
tells me ifn a words speld wrong. Wish I had this
thing years ago woulda saved those three long
years of schoolin which tort me jack-shit. This
spellin thing is truly amazing like if I write " I
seen Mary Janes carnt last week" it tells me " I
saw Mary Jane's cunt last week" So I yell, "Hey
Pa, this puter seen Mary Janes pussy too." And Pa
said, "Shit Bawney, everbody in the district has
seen that glue-pot, looks like she's branchin'
out."
Don't remember much when I was small; used to be
wif Mom all the time. Pa always had some sick
sheep in the paddocks, which needed, as he put it,
"My undisturbed attention." When he said that, me
an Mom knew it was serious so we kept away.
Strange thing is tho he usta say it damn near
every day. Never saw any dead sheep about so Pa
must have been fixin these ewes up real good.
Once a month Mom an me would set off in the pick-
up and travel around all the local farms and Mom
would cut the men's hair. I used to look forward
to these days but I didn't know why, like I was
only about five or six an pretty stoopid. Mom was
kinda skinny but she had real big chest muscles,
Pa calls 'em milk jugs, but they don't look like
any milk jug on our table so Pa was wrong I think.
First call was to old Mr. Jackson. Pa said he was
a cranky old coot but he welcomed me n Mom big
time, always smilin' and putting his arm around
Mom. "Hello little pecker," he'd say to me as he
grabbed me on cock. Mom just larfed.
Mom would put her special sheet around his neck,
which just about covered him and set about
trimming his hair. He used to sit there fiddling
under the sheet as Mom bent over him. "I got this
special itch again Nikki and there is an extra ten
bucks for you if you can fix it" I reasoned that
the itch musta been between his legs cos he was
fiddling a lot down there. Anyway Mom thort
different I suppose because she pressed right up
against him inspecting his scalp, looking for bugs
I thought. The funny thing was that her milk jugs
were pressed right in his face and his head was
movin' around trying to get away! Shit I laughed.
He even tried pushin them jugs away with his
tongue but Mom would not budge.
Mom must not have found any bugs on his head cos
her hand went under the sheet, probably to see
what he was scratching at. She must have found one
but was having trouble catchin' it because her
hand was going up and down real fast. You had to
feel kinda sorry for old Mr. Jackson, there he was
trapped in the chair with my Moms jugs still in
his face and her hand going crazy between his
legs. "Oh Nikki, I think ya got it," he mumbled.
And Mom sure must have caught it and squashed it
too cos the special sheet turned wet right where
her hand was. What a dumb ass that Jackson was.
Still he paid Mom the extra 10 bucks anyway.
Next we headed up into the mountains to a small
homestead where old Harry McMinn and his dog
lived. I don't know who was the happiest to see
us, the dog or Harry. They was both jumpin' around
and fussin' over us, I swear some people just love
getting their haircut.
I sat on the floor with the dog while Mom started
to work on Harry. The dog started licking his cock
and I thort that looked like a good idea. So I
twisted this way and that but I just could not
reach the damn thing. "Mom, why cant I lick my
cock like the dog does" I shouted "Don't let that
damn dog lick your cock Bawney, you never know
where its been," shouted Mom. Shit, she got that
wrong but it gave me a cool idea anyway. While Mom
was cutting away, Harry said, "How's every little
thing Nikki," as he spoke his hand sort of got
mixed up between Moms special sheet and her dress.
So there was poor Harry with his hand stuck up
Moms dress and he didn't even know it. Of course
Mom was too polite to mention it and she sort of
just wriggled and giggled while Harry talked about
her little thing.
It must have been the weather causin a mess of
bugs to be around the district because you would
not believe what Harry said next. He said "Nikki
I been meanin' to get you to check me out for some
itchin I got. Now since my back is a bit crook it
might be easier if I lay on the bed" "Oh poor
Harry," said Mom "Of course it will cost you an
extra twenty for me to do the job."
Mom and Harry went into the bedroom together while
I sat talkin' to the dog. The damn thing started
licking his old cock again and this time I watched
real close as it grew and poked out of its furry
pocket. I felt real excited but I didn't know why.
Now that I'm 16 I sure know why but 10 years ago I
was so fuckin' dumb. Hell just about all the farm
animals have had a bit of a lick of me and I'm
rightly proud of that. After a while I heard Harry
makin' odd noises so I went to see what was
happening in the bedroom. It was unbelievable.
Harry was gettin the hairs around his balls
inspected for bugs but his old cock must have got
in the way.
How I see it is that Mom had to use her two hands
to catch bugs so what does she do? She holds his
cock with her mouth to keep it outa the way. Mom
sure is smart. Harry is doing his best to help Mom
too cos her jugs musta been hampering things a bit
so he just held onto them for her. Grown up people
sure help each other. Well Mom must have bitten
his old cock a bit too hard because all of a
sudden his hips are movin up and down like he's
trying hard to get his cock away! But Mom just
hangs on, in fact she uses one hand to hold onto
it until Harry relaxed a bit. I asked if they
needed a hand and Harry said "Son a few minutes
ago you cooda been holding my nuts, maybe next
time," I thort that was strange cos I didn't see
any peanuts about. Fuck, you don't know how dumb I
was then!
Mom pockets the extra twenty dollars, gives old
Harry a real sloppy kiss on the mouth and asks him
how it tasted. Musta been a new lipstick or
something. Our next customer was Tennessee Bill,
who, since the departure of his dearly beloved
wife, lives alone in a cabin not far from Harry.
As we arrived, I heard Bill inside sayin "Sorry
Sue, Nikki is here, we'll continue later." He must
have been feedin his bitch. Now I'm 16 I knows
what he was feedin' her. Bill was a strange one,
bald as a coot, so I figured he had a bad case of
the itch cos no way did he need a haircut. "Well
Bawney," says Bill. "What about you going over to
the tree house in the branches of that tree in the
gully and play." I looked up at Mom and she said
"That's a good idea Bawney, I got this farmin
problem to discuss with Bill about the best way to
plough a gully and I think you would find it
pretty uninteresting. So away to the tree house I
strolled.
It was quiet all around me, all I could here was
this squeaking coming from the cabin. Figured that
Bill musta had somethin' badly in need of
lubrication and how right I was! Anyways to pass
the time I tried again to lick my cock, that darn
dog was sure good at it. I wedged myself in the
corner and tried real hard. This time my cock
tried to help cos it went all hard and tried to
get to my mouth but my little tongue could not
quite reach it. Maybe when I'm bigger, I thort, my
tongue will grow some. Shit now I'm 16 and my
tongue didn't grow but, praise the lord, my cock
sure did, what a blast - heh heh.
After an hour I wandered back to the cabin. "How's
the ploughin goin' Mom" I yelled as I walked in.
Now this was strange, Mom was lyin' on the bed on
her tummy and Bill layin' over her, they was both
under the covers. Mom says quick as a flash
"Bawney honey, the fire went out so kin you git
some wood and start it up now, Bill is just
checking the back of my head for bugs and I don't
want to catch cold when he's finished. You see if
you can find that dollar I dropped in the woodshed
yesterday Bawney," said Bill, "I got two more bugs
to find yet" Mom groaned sort of happy like. As I
was walkin' out Bill says to Mom, "Shit Nikki you
sure got the tightest little hole ever," I thort
maybe a bug had crawled into her ear hole or
somethin'. I noticed that Mom's dress was on the
back of a chair and I smiled thinkin' how
considerate she was not to get it all crinkled up
helpin' Bill. Now I'm 16 and I know that Bill was
just enjoyin' hisself butt fuckin my Mom. Boy I
was a dumb little kid.
Over the next few years Mom made a pile of money
cuttin hair, she was very popular and I can now
see why. She must have screwed every farmer in the
community on a regular basis, that is those that
weren't balls deep into sheep like Pa is. Fuck it,
I think I was the only male around who missed out
on a share of her pussy. Mom must have had some
principals after all but not me! I would have
fucked her any old time. Shit I was a dumb kid.
Please send comments to: laurabwood@yahoo.com
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Please keep this story, and all erotic stories out
of the hands of children. They should be outside
playing in the sun, not thinking about adult
situations.
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Kristen's collection - Directory 6