Message-ID: <53824asstr$1147241401@assm.asstr.org>
From: "Carol C" <cobillard@hotmail.com>
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Subject: {ASSM} Sex and the older woman, and some other stuff
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Date: Wed, 10 May 2006 02:10:01 -0400
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.   And here's to you, Mrs. Robinson
.   Jesus loves you more than you will know (Wo, wo, wo)
.   God bless you please, Mrs. Robinson
.   Heaven holds a place for those who pray
.   (Hey, hey, hey ... hey, hey, hey)


In my last essay on the religious aspect of sexuality
http://www.angelfire.com/co4/cobil/religion.html I addressed the common 
predilection of older men -- like the Rev. X -- for younger women. (That 
essay is still a work in process, and was posted only in draft.) It now 
occurs to me that I ought to stress that within Mom's Friend's "same age" 
rule for the under 18s it was consistent not only for men to approach girls 
after their 18th birthday -- so long as they respected an answer of "no" -- 
but that there was more than one older woman, meaning mothers of girls in 
our community, who, like Mrs. Robinson and many others in conventional 
society, were eager for sex with young men. The common nudity and the 
absence of inhibitions facilitated such dalliances. While it was appropriate 
to deflect an under-age boy (although who can be sure that there were no 
violations of this rule) any girl or woman who found that a particular boy's 
penis was excited by her body was free, in our ethic, to claim that penis 
for her own. For a while. And certainly there were young men who found sex 
with adult women supremely pleasurable: we all, after all, have bodily 
preferences and many boys transfer their affection for their mothers into 
sexual attraction for older women and, finally, older women are more 
experienced and, perhaps, more solicitous with a young man's penis.

I need to start at the beginning, however.

Our circle of friends included many who lived far away and who came only for 
summer camps, for the occasional dance party or just for the annual alumni 
barbecue event. Mom and Mom's Friend knew a group of women in Nevada whom 
they knew from CoG days. We would see them and their kids on such occasions.

It's important to realize that because our sexuality is related to our 
faith, we were encouraged and permitted to express it -- bluntly, to have 
sex -- only within our own community. To the outside world we dressed and 
acted conventionally. Whether I chose to wear a bra or not was one thing, 
but aside from that if I didn't expect to meet an approved partner my dress 
and attitude would never have marked me as a girl who had sex an average of 
twice a week and with hundreds of different partners from the age of 11 on 
into my 20s: about 1,500 orgasms over that time. But within our community, 
and especially within our families, common nudity and, once we reached 
puberty, sexual activity in front of family and friends was part and parcel 
of our lifestyle and beliefs. As I've said many times, our faith excluded 
coercion of all kinds; some kids, while brought up in that environment, 
abstained from sex at puberty -- indeed it was common enough for a boy or 
girl to become shy and embarrassed and to withdraw from nude activities from 
the age of 11 or so until fully developed. A few would not rejoin the group 
or have their first sex until 15 or even 16. Even fewer -- 1% or so -- would 
not be seen again, or if they were in our presence would not relate to us at 
all: these could be presumed to be gay, were left alone and we would 
generally not see them again. But by and large as soon as a boy or girl was 
physically and emotionally ready -- at 13 or so -- she or he would 
spontaneously begin relating in a different way to the group, and to the 
opposite sex. Parents, mothers especially, took it as a sacred duty to 
encourage this. If ejaculation is an expression of God's Message and if 
reception of semen is Holy Communion, then it is part of our evangelical 
obligation to reach out to the youth of our faith and to encourage the 
impulses and attractions that anyway are developing naturally. It is simply 
a matter of banishing shyness, embarrassment, inhibitions, socially-imposed 
"guilt". Somehow, from early childhood, we absorbed, just as we absorbed 
language, an appreciation for the beauty of the sex organs, vicarious 
delight in erections and in others' orgasms. From those early days on, I 
always knew that once I reached puberty I would want to play with penises, 
to have them in my mouth and vagina, to want to feel, to taste, to swallow 
semen. But not yet: first I would have to develop breasts and pubic hair, I 
would have to be sexually attractive and magnetic to boys of my own age. And 
of course the boy would have to be of an age to ejaculate semen -- at least 
a little bit. (Let us not get to the issue of children being able to 
experience physical pleasure from friction on their penises and clitorises. 
That is undoubtedly true, and I have known a number of boys, and some girls, 
who masturbated beginning regularly years before puberty. But they did not 
have the innate need to do so, the hormonal impulsion, the irresistible 
attraction.)

For those who lived far away, a boy or a girl's first sexual experience 
might be at Mom's Friend's House. A girl might have a coming out party, or 
be matched with a boy (or, less frequently, spontaneously take hold of a 
boy) at one of our events. One can usually tell that it is an adolescent's 
first time. The partner, rarely a virgin her- or himself, would know without 
being told and would fall into didactic mode, leading the way but at the 
partner's pace. Others would come back after an absence of many months or a 
year and would declare "I learned how this winter"; or else without any 
declaration at all simply carry her- or himself in a way that suggested 
receptivity to sexual approach. Thus: taking pleasure in being watched, even 
stared at, pleasure in breasts, penis, vagina being seen, being smiled at, 
being appreciated. For a girl, seeing a boy's penis become erect in response 
to her body required a reaction: unequivocal acceptance or rejection. (In 
the outside world girls equivocate, tease. That wouldn't work with us.) And 
likewise, if a girl took interest in a boy's penis, he would normally 
respond in kind. Bear in mind that we were always deemed to have been 
"properly introduced" by the mere fact of belonging to the same community of 
faith or, for those who were not in fact religious, of the community of 
believers in free sexual expression by and for adolescents.

I've mentioned in the past families that vacationed together or otherwise 
arranged for themselves and especially for their children to be together 
naked, not only as naturists but as sexual progressives. If a child does not 
encounter this way of life from toddlerhood he or she is unlikely to be 
comfortable being seen nude after the age of ten and is even less likely to 
accept the notion of public sex or, importantly, to understand the 
relationship of romance and passion to religious devotion and their 
independence from love and marriage and fecundity. Hence the eagerness of 
many mothers (and a few fathers) to bring their kids to visit at Mom's 
Friend's House at least once in a while, even if their only sight of nudity 
and sex would otherwise be at home. One would not like a child to think that 
early and free sex as a bizarre family practice rather than a firm belief by 
a real population of self-assured and secure communes and sects.

By way of example were the Nevada mothers who brought the boy of one and the 
girl of the other together regularly, instilling in them the knowledge that 
as soon as the boy's penis reached 4-1/2 inches -- by which time the girl's 
vagina would certainly be developed and ready for it -- of course they would 
celebrate it by having sex. That actually happened. They'd been occasionally 
to Mom's Friend's House, and now they came back during vacation time so the 
kids could mingle freely with their peers and enjoy sharing their bodies 
with others, expanding their horizons and opportunity for communion. When 
they arrived, we could see anticipation on the kids' faces and a sort of 
critical observation of the naked bodies of others. Their story had preceded 
them, and so they were surrounded by eligible partners. Unfortunately I was 
too old for the boy. Older Girl and I set up Terrific Girl to go forward and 
approach him.

In her own stylish way she broke through the crowd and while he was frozen, 
staring at her breasts, she proceeded to undress him, taking down his 
underpants with panache and flourish. Her aim was to have mutual oral sex 
with him so that we could all enjoy the sight of tongue in vagina and penis 
in mouth, see how closely the two could time their orgasms, and enjoy the 
sensuality of semen dripping from the corner of Terrific Girl's mouth. 
Meanwhile the Nevada girl -- this boy's first sex partner, disrobed and 
showed us her bouncy little breasts and lovely triangle of hair. She avoided 
accepting any partner and said she'd wait to do that until after lunch. That 
was a clever decision on her part since it assured her being surrounded by 
eager boys and of being the center of attraction while each, without ever 
mentioning sex or being crude in any way, tried to convince her that she 
would enjoy his penis best.

All this time the adults were looking on fondly, the two Nevada mothers 
taking personal pride in their kids' bodies, the mother of the boy 
demonstrating as much as any mother ever could that "mystical bond" I've so 
often mentioned that exists between a mother and the penis of her son. A few 
of the single parents began, too, pairing off and were already fondling each 
other like teenagers. They were, in a sense, setting down markers as well as 
reminding all the children and genuine teens that sex is ageless and that 
the arousal of an adult is no less holy and the erect penis of a grown man 
no less lovely than those of young persons. (I get annoyed when girls speak 
of "dirty old penises" because there is nothing dirty about a penis; it is 
selfish lust that is dirty.)

Meanwhile, from my point of view, one of the nicest things was the sight of 
a whole group of boys and girls -- myself included -- having lunch with 
everyone seemingly oblivious to the fact that at any given moment so many of 
the boys' penises were erect. I made a conscious effort to be sensuous, but 
I think that even if we hadn't I -- and the other girls -- would have had 
airs of eagerness and anticipation. Anticipated sex is something one can 
always see in faces, on breasts, in posture and in movement. Even -- or 
perhaps especially -- while eating (or better "dining", even if it's just a 
barbecue).

For the adolescents one might have thought that there would be a pecking 
order in relation to fitness, physical appearance, beauty, and size and 
presentation of sex parts. In fact, while bodily beauty was certainly 
appreciated and everybody had preferences in relation to breasts, penis, 
hair and so on, the fact that partners were changed, or exchanged, almost 
every day made this irrelevant: variety was prized more than claiming 
"title" to the prettiest girl or the most athletic boy, if only because one 
held onto a particular partner just for the purpose, and for the duration, 
of arousal, sex and orgasm. One could be good friends with a boy, 
emotionally and intellectually very close to him, but it was very rare among 
us to demand fidelity. Even when I was "going" with the 16-Year-Old Boy it 
didn't stop either of us from enjoying sex with others; rather it gave us -- 
me, anyway -- an excuse at a particular period when I was tired of being, as 
I thought, "passed around" and I had some adolescent personal issues to deal 
with.

So: just as in the criteria I gave for the for judging of that "Second 
Annual Best Penis Contest", functionality of a penis was at our parties the 
most essential aspect, the prime criterion. Penises are simply great fun to 
play with, to kiss, suck and bring to ejaculation. They are lovely to look 
at. But then so are vaginas, but that is more by way of extension and 
anticipation. Boys and girls tended to sit, chez nous, with legs apart and 
there is nothing lovelier than to have sight of the sex parts of both boy 
and girl as they begin to relate to each other. And loveliest of all is the 
really stiff penis, big or small, responding to the promise of the vagina 
opposite, especially when it begins to exude a drop or two of seminal fluid. 
Girls who are reading this will know what I mean.

----------

I don't remember how we came to know that Terrific Girl planned to make a 
show of introducing the Nevada boy to mutual oral sex -- to soixante-neuf -- 
but the fact that we did led us all to defer to her and, once we'd finished 
our barbecue lunch, to turn towards her and her Nevada boy, who seemed 
anxious to be on display and had no sign of an erection.

There was always a stack of beach towels in the back yard near the pool: 
indeed there was an industrial-strength washing machine in a garden shed 
there to keep them clean. Terrific Girl spread out one and sat down with her 
boy and kissed him and they began to fondle each other. His hands gravitated 
to her breasts and she smiled coquettishly. Presently, she began to play 
with his penis, and she leaned down and slid it into her mouth and began to 
excite it. When it was half erect she lay back, pulled him over her and 
guided his penis into her mouth and his mouth to her vagina. We could see 
her lips working on the penis while he moved his hips up and down trying to 
maximize his pleasure. And worked at the same time to please her with his 
tongue. Later she was to tell us that she'd warned him never to stop licking 
her clitoris and vagina even as he approached climax and ejaculation. But as 
it happened, Terrific Girl got there first, and she made no secret of her 
ecstasy -- in fact she seemed to frighten the Nevada boy with her shriek. 
When she'd calmed down, she had the boy dismount and lie back and she 
approached his penis from below, a position which, for many boys, allows for 
more direct stimulation and hence more rapid excitement and ejaculation. We 
could see the difference in the face of the boy: he was no longer worried 
about giving pleasure, he was just straining to receive it and to ejaculate 
into Terrific Girl's mouth. When he did she let us see the semen right away 
and it was a signal to us that we ought to be having fun too.

The Nevada girl had watched this all very closely, her mouth open, her head 
moving in sympathy with Terrific Girl's as if over a penis of its own. After 
all, she knew that penis well. Two boys stood behind her, competing for 
attention, but until the Nevada boy ejaculated she seemed not to notice. At 
that point she turned and looked at them, stretched out her right arm and 
put her index finger to the chin of the boy she deemed the cuter of the two. 
She giggled and made a little jump, which caused her breasts to bounce. Her 
nipples were a bit bigger than normal, and I could see they were very 
attractive to all the males. (It made me wish that mine were like that, even 
though many boys have told me mine are super.) The two embraced and I could 
see the boy's penis rising against her body. It looked really nice, very 
adolescent. I always enjoy the sight of two bodies with lots of hair on 
their heads and nice pubic triangles, and the bodies pubescently smooth 
elsewhere. It didn't surprise me at all when the Nevada girl got to her 
knees and began to examine her new boy's penis. She lifted it up and tested 
it with her tongue, put it in her mouth, looked up at the boy and smiled. It 
represented all that is delightful and beautiful about adolescent sex and 
also the fun that is oral sex. In retrospect, today when oral sex is 
acknowledged as normal and healthy sexual expression I can see why so many 
kids rush to try it just as soon as they have crossed the threshold into 
puberty. Mom's Friend, though, taught early on that oral sex is the best 
foreplay: it's one of those issues were society has caught up with us. (It 
is curious: just as yawning is contagious, the sight of others at sex -- 
most especially oral sex -- arouses. This, of course, is the basis of the 
pornography industry.)

The girl must have tired of kneeling or the boy of standing there because 
they moved over and he lay down on a beach towel. The Nevada girl resumed 
stroking his penis with her mouth and tongue and it was really sensuous the 
way she allowed us to see most of the tip of his penis at each upward 
stroke. The boy lay there passive, his penis stiff and vertical; she varied 
the speed of her strokes, and from time to time we could see her tongue 
pressed closely against the bottom of the penis as it slid in and out. She 
was grasping the penis with her right hand and never let it go further than 
halfway into her mouth. For those of us who know a lot about oral sex it was 
obvious that she knew what she was doing and was maximizing her boy's 
pleasure. And through it, I suppose, her own satisfaction. This went on for 
quite some time -- at least ten minutes -- before we saw a sign of semen and 
she continued her strokes for at least a minute after that before taking the 
penis out of her mouth, its head now all coated with semen. Then she 
restored it to her mouth to suck off and swallow the white fluid.

The two then changed places and the boy began to kiss and suck and lick 
Nevada girl's vagina. Pretty soon her vagina dilated as if eager for a 
penis. But the boy persisted with his tongue, patiently stimulating clitoris 
and vagina, pressing it deeply inside. In the background parents had been 
watching and that most of the men, at least, were visibly aroused. 
Cunnilingus is, however, a bit less of a spectacle than fellatio and couples 
began to lose interest in Nevada girl and to think about satisfying their 
own libidos. I felt that way too and I clung to the nearest unattached and 
eligible boy. We looked each other in the eye, scanned each other's body, 
and had enough information for informed consent. It never took me long to 
decide on a partner. I had my preferences of course; but the major ones 
(circumcision for example) were taken care of by Mom's Friend's House rules. 
(As I've written, more than one pre-pubescent boy had to be circumcised in 
order to come to stay. I never heard of any post-pubescent boy who had it 
done, but it's possible.)

I sat down in a chair my legs wide apart and this boy whom I'd never seen 
before and whose name I did not yet know knelt in front and with his fingers 
gently pulled my labia apart and with his tongue tickled and moistened my 
vaginal area and my clitoris. He kissed me there and he proceeded to lick 
inside my vagina and to flick his tongue over my clitoris. He would suck all 
my soft parts into his mouth and caress them with his tongue. And he would 
repeat the process over and over again until I felt climax coming on. I 
moved my body forward a bit signaling to him that I was about to come, and 
then it happened. I felt warm all over, tingly, and then his tongue stopped 
being pleasurable and started to make me sore. I pushed him back a little 
and I could see his penis fiercely erect. We exchanged places, and now I 
knelt in front of him and his penis was in my mouth, my right hand grasping 
the lower part of his penis and his scrotum. Not very many people were 
watching us and that bothered me since at that point in my life I always 
wanted to be at the center of attention when I was having sex, and more 
especially when I was playing with a penis because I knew I could put on a 
good show. I decided I would try to make a game out of it and I left the boy 
in the chair for a minute while I collected two more folding chairs and 
found complaisant boys to sit in them. By this time a few of my friends were 
paying attention and it was becoming a kind of sport. There was actually a 
certain amount of competition for access to the two available penises. My 
boy's had deflated by now, and so all three of us had to start with flaccid 
penises, exciting them with gentle oral persuasion -- mostly licking the 
underside of the penis with our tongues -- before grasping them tightly 
between our lips and stimulating them towards ejaculation. It wasn't at all 
a speed contest -- I think that's something best left to 12- and 13-year 
olds. It was just the fun of parallel sex, not really very different except 
in age from when I would do this alongside Mom with, for example, a father 
and his son. I can't imagine anything cuter or sexier than a couple or three 
girls in a row, each holding a penis she's made erect, each kissing and 
licking its tip like a lollipop and putting it in her mouth to rub and 
caress, eager to see and feel and taste the sacred syrup that will spurt out 
of its little slit.  Coupled with that was the principle that the witnessing 
of an orgasm doubles its pleasure: we wanted to share the sight of that 
semen as each boy ejaculated in turn, so and we all made sure to hold it in 
our mouths and on our tongues to show it off before swallowing it.

The other girls had their own climaxes to see to. I needed to relinquish my 
chair to another couple, and instead of standing by with my boy while the 
their girls exposed their vaginas I went off in the direction of Older Girl, 
tugging my boy's hand. Over 19 now, Older Girl was excluded from the teen 
crowd and was with a 30-ish older man whom I took to be a weekend father 
who'd brought a child over for acclimatization to the sexual-naturist 
environment. She had him sit in yet another chair and went to work with her 
mouth on his big penis, working exclusively on its head with tongue and 
lips. She didn't keep this up for long. Soon she stood up and moved close to 
him, standing with her legs apart, albeit a bit awkwardly, such that his 
tongue had easy access to her vagina. He stroked it up and down and we could 
measure Older Girl's increasing excitement by the way her vaginal opening 
changed in appearance, in color and shape. Soon she pulled away and knelt 
again, sucked  briefly on his penis once more, took seemingly from nowhere a 
condom and unrolled it over the penis. Then both them were on the ground and 
his penis was moving manfully in and out of her vagina. (Because once kids 
went off to college they were presumed to be having sex outside our closed 
circle of friends, anybody over 17 was supposed to use a condom every time. 
In fact, Older Girl maintained a group of a dozen friends who, by 
restricting unprotected sex to themselves avoided the rule within the 
group.) At this point, the man's son came over accompanied by a couple of 
other small kids and began to stare. (I heard one of the mothers cry out, 
"Kids, remember: until your penis or 'gina grows, never let anybody except a 
doctor touch it; but when it gets big and hairy you will want a partner to 
play with it and kiss it and have fun and make you feel good".) Both Older 
Girl and the man looked at them and smiled. Older Girl pulled the condom off 
her partner's penis and then, in a romantic act put the penis into her mouth 
and licked off the semen that was there. She turned to the kids to tell them 
how good sex felt and repeat how they, too, would love it when their bodies 
grew sexy.

(In that mother's cautionary exclamation lies the key: the sex parts of a 
pre-pubescent child are inviolate, and children's exposure to teens and 
adults at sex is purely didactic and holistic. On the other hand, mutual, 
consensual touching between pubescent and adolescent kids of the opposite 
sex is to be encouraged. This could take place just as soon as the first 
pubic hairs appeared on boy and girl, whether or not either was ready for 
penis in vagina. The first touching, typically by a girl of the penis of a 
boy acquaintance or a caress by a boy of a girl's breastlet, will lead to 
more and better, and inevitably to the pursuit of orgasm. There may be a 
time lag: sometimes it takes conditioning before a boy is ready to have a 
spontaneous erection, and it takes some thoughtful effort for a girl to deal 
with a recalcitrant penis, making it erect by oral stimulation alone. In 
fact, oral sex is the best way to start, and not just because it works well 
even with a penis that is only semi-erect. Equally important is that young 
girls typically don't get an orgasm from vaginal sex at first; with a boy's 
tongue stimulating clitoris and vagina nearly every girl can be satisfied.

(Usually after their first time boys erections will come spontaneously, 
automatically; the only other issue I can think of is occasional shyness and 
embarrassment the first time the boy has sex with others watching. This is 
one reason why "reliable" and confident 14-year-old boys were in such demand 
for coming-out parties: if a girl, anxious herself at being deflowered with 
her mom and her friends watching has to deal with a potentially 
dysfunctional penis the most important celebration of her life could be 
spoiled. She should able to take it in her mouth as a sign of affection and 
to lubricate it, not as a last-ditch effort to make it erect. It worked best 
when the boy had self confidence when his penis was erect in his mom's 
presence. Then if just the thought of sex wasn't enough he could rub it and 
make it erect before entering the room. When his mom took down his 
underpants (if that was part of the ceremony) his penis would spring out 
nicely. From what I know, if the girl's mom wanted a virgin boy to be the 
one, then at least the couple should have gotten together for mutual 
caressing a day or so beforehand to get to know each other's body and to 
make sure that apprehension and anxiety would not get in the way of a strong 
erection, that on the day his penis would be strong enough to pierce the 
girl's hymen on its first stroke, whatever its size. You can envisage the 
girl sitting there, her legs wide apart and elevated, and the boy rising up 
from having licked and lubricated her vagina and pressing his penis home.

(As for familiarization and confidence-building, recall the story of my own 
tentative strokes of a boy's penis to help him masturbate, and my surprise 
when he ejaculated into my face. Soon after that, I let a boy put his penis 
in my vagina during a playful tumble. And within days a penis was in my 
mouth and I was publicly celebrating having semen coating my tongue and my 
teeth.)

Now there were nude bodies everywhere and it seemed to be the case that 
everybody older than 11 or 12 was in the throes of sex or, having had it 
already, was in post-coital embrace. In fact, as always there were some who 
opted out and some who could not find a suitable partner. Some parents and 
other adults while happy to have sex in front of family and friends didn't 
do so in front of strangers. Also, single mothers were far more numerous 
than single fathers among Mom's Friend's circle and so many of the women had 
to content themselves with wistful observation and vicarious pleasure in 
their child's orgasm. The over-18 group consisted of friends of Older Girl, 
college students and others who'd grown up in this circle

What was different about this day from other barbecues and pool parties and 
reunions was that there seemed to be a disproportionate pairing off of 
adults with college-age partners. Perhaps there was an unusually large 
proportion of boys to girls; I only recall seeing one father embracing a 
girl student, his erect penis telling us what would come next. The Nevada 
mothers each had found, or been found by, one of the older boys. Those 
mothers were 30-something and still in their prime; I also saw a mother or 
grandmother of at least 50 playing with a college penis. It is said that 
while men are in their sexual prime in their teens, women reach that much 
later, even at twice the age. So I guess I shouldn't be surprised to see two 
lovely, athletic mothers attracted to teen penises, fondling and kissing 
them. It is sometimes said that boys who seek sex with older women have a 
mother complex but I don't think this was that. One point is that with 
casual sex, especially of the evangelical type where the exchange of bodily 
fluids represents Holy Communion, there is little intellectual exchange 
other than the religious and the sensual so the usual complaint that a 
mature woman would have little to talk about to a teen-age boy isn't 
relevant. I saw one of the boys spending a lot of time with his partner's 
breasts as if he was seeking sustenance: we all have our preferences in body 
appearance and perhaps he did have a fantasy of maternal sex. I didn't watch 
them continuously and all I noted in my diary was that she spent some time 
with his penis in her mouth before and after his caressing her, and that in 
due course he licked at her vagina and then put his penis inside -- against 
all rules without a condom -- to reach orgasm. Whether or not she actually 
felt the stream of semen, the ejaculation itself clearly gave the woman 
pleasure; that, it seems to me, is more common with older than with younger 
women.

I might add that although Moses David did not allow, or at least greatly 
discouraged, the use of birth control (hence the large number of "Jesus 
babies" like me) Mom's Friend and others like her had seen the invention of 
the birth control pill as a work of God and a reaffirmation of their faith 
that adolescents should be free to have sex and thereby to do His work. So 
every girl was urged to go on the Pill from the time of her first 
menstruation -- meaning she would be ready for a coming-out party if she 
wanted one, or spontaneous lovemaking if that was to happen. The only 
unplanned (or planned?) pregnancies I can recall were of older women. Who 
knows? This might explain the failure of some to follow Mom's Friend's rule 
that all the over-18s should use condoms, of which there was always a supply 
handy.

Within two hours just about everybody who wanted to have sex had found a 
partner and had found satisfaction. The best thing about our community is 
that, it being female-oriented, every girl and woman had the right to pursue 
an orgasm and by and large it was the girl who would set the pace and choose 
the position for sex. It was also the girls who saw to it that people 
cleaned up after themselves and each other: I can't remember the last time 
that I saw a discarded condom or tampon or tissue in Mom's Friend's yard. 
While stuff might occasionally get misplaced or lost, misappropriation was 
rare. More common was exaggeration and  broken promises; but even there the 
expectation of a different partner next time made that largely irrelevant. 
Instead, much like eBay's feedback system, boys and girls had to worry that 
a bad reputation would precede them. I suspect that if anybody who wanted 
sex didn't have it it was either because of a mismatching of ages (something 
which I surmised above might have led to college boys seeking out older 
women) or because there was always somebody who didn't get the message that 
he (usually he, sometimes she) just wasn't wanted. I've said many times that 
a cute penis is only half of what is needed: a great personality (and in 
later life money and professional status) easily make up for the lack of a 
giant penis even among girls who enjoy flaunting such partners. Until really 
tight jeans came into fashion this year it was rather hard for a girl to 
show off her partner's big penis anywhere but at the beach or at a nude 
party. But nice clothes, expensive stuff and costly venues are things 
everybody can see. I say this by way of observation and not by way of 
endorsement. For the rest, oral sex does the job; and even for getting 
pregnant a little bit of semen is no less effective than a lot, the main 
issue being the number of sperm per square centimeter of seminal fluid. But 
perhaps I'm getting to technical, or too biological and scientific.

People started to leave about that time, especially those like the Nevada 
families who came from some distance away. Then the parents with children 
started to leave, along with those few kids who hadn't found (or hadn't 
wanted) any partner that day. There are only two showers at Mom's Friend's 
pool, so most people didn't bother. I think to us it's a badge of honor, 
respect and sanctity to keep traces of semen on our bodies as long as 
possible. It was mostly the intellectuals who stayed late, and they weren't 
necessarily both halves of all the couples. One isn't supposed to change 
partners on the day, but once people were alone and single again nothing 
seemed to be in the way of their re-coupling with another. The absence of 
jealousy and envy were palpable, which is to say that sexual freedom and 
guileless romance and passion asserted themselves. It didn't seem at all 
like those parties you hear about where there is group sex, or exchange of 
partners and swinging all of an evening. It was just that unlike the initial 
pairing off on the basis of introductions and casual observance and 
accidental re-acquaintance, coupling now was based on intellect and on 
shared interests more than on fascination with body. If people had sex a 
second time it would not be out of urgency but out of affection. There were 
never enough chairs anyway, so lots of girls sat on boy's laps; and nearly 
every boy used that as an opportunity to play with his girl's breasts, and 
more.

As always, I seem to have strayed from my original subject and followed my 
stream of consciousness into digression. Nevertheless I think I've made at 
least part of my point: that it isn't only older men and younger women who 
are attracted (for quite different reasons, usually) to each other. That 
maternal fixation with penis and filial fixation with breasts are alive and 
well, and isn't half of sex imagining what could be instead of observing 
what is? I know that many of my friends from Our Town of Older Girl's age 
group regret the passing of their adolescent freedoms and adolescent fun, 
when sex could be enjoyed freely, under parental guidance and protection. 
Once past, say, 25 there are long-term implications or at least long-term 
motivations. But close your eyes and you could be 13 again and the fumbling 
tongue at your clitoris could belong to that new boy come to stay for the 
holidays at Mom's Friend's House.

----------

Freedom. Aren't we fighting a war for that? Perhaps not. Somebody wrote to 
me recently and asked for a reference to some of the serious professional 
writing on politico-economic affairs that I do at my job. Unfortunately I 
can't do that, and anyway my work doesn't get a by-line since it's assembled 
with that of others, responsible for different geographical areas and 
different issues, to make up risk surveys. But I have posted a few pages 
edited out of some work I did last week, and which I've now re-written a bit 
to stand alone. And changed at the end to attach some relevance for this 
essay on sexual freedom. Find it at
http://www.angelfire.com/co4/cobil/incidence.html -- but I warn you it has 
the rather dry title of "On the incidence of the national debt: Postmodern, 
post-voodoo economics".

I'm always glad to hear from readers and although I can't reply personally I 
do try to accommodate by explaining what made me tick as a young girl. Be 
aware that whereas nobody you know may have lived that way and nobody you 
know may have had sex before 15 (or, who knows, 25...) there really are 
subcultures that know no shame, have no inhibitions and reject artificial 
social rules and cynical, hypocritical religious constraints. We were, in 
fact, scarcely alone in finding, from a young age, religious experience in 
free sexual expression. We had fun: our growing up, while not without 
conflict, insecurity and other problems was enriching and a blessing. I hope 
yours was too.

Love,
Carol

-- 
Pursuant to the Berne Convention, this work is copyright with all rights
reserved by its author unless explicitly indicated.
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