Child Brides of India

By C. Stanton Leman

Chapter 22: Aleeya (Mg, rom, no sex)

Later that morning at the park….

Once at the park, Mom began to talk to Aleeya. She asked her if her mother hit her like that very often and Aleeya got quiet. Mom said, “It’s all right, Sweetheart, you’re not in any trouble. We just want to make sure you don’t get hurt anymore.”

Aleeya looked down and said to my mom, “My mother doesn’t like me too much. She always says that I should have been a boy and that because of me, she’ll never have the boy she and Daddy wanted.”

“How does that make you feel?”

“Sad… very sad.

“I feel like they don’t want me. Even though Daddy loves me, he’s not home with Mommy and me during the day. He doesn’t know she beats me and when he sees my bruises, Momma just tells him I’m careless and clumsy.

“I heard him talking to Mom one night after I went to bed and he said that if he had a son, he could teach him to help with his shop and help continue to build what he’s started. A girl is a burden on the family: you raise her and she only leaves to help her husband’s family.”

“Why does she hit you?”

“Because I wet my panties. I’m always so scared that she’s going to beat me and sometimes I pee-pee on the carpet. I can’t help it. She said that she was tired of me going pee. I wet the bed at night sometimes too and she’s spanked me every time I did it.”

“I see,” my mother said. “Do you think you might know why you go wee in bed at night?”

“Whenever I think she’s going to beat me with a switch or spank me, I pee in my panties. I’m afraid to be alone at night and I’m scared to tell her because my mother and father don’t like to be disturbed when they go to bed, They’re always doing secret things at night and I try and hold it, but it just comes out. I don’t feel safe at night.”

Aleeya started to cry and said, “She told me that I was a bad girl and that she was going to make me wear nappies again because I was acting like a baby.”

She smiled through her tears and said, “But last night, I felt so safe and loved. I felt like a princess! Sean held me in his arms and protected me and I felt safe for the first time in my life!”

“How do you feel about Sean, Aleeya?’”

“I love him! He’s my Prince Charming and treats me like a big girl!”

“What do you mean ‘like a big girl’?”

“Sean held me and said he would keep me safe and that he wouldn’t let anyone hurt me, and he did. He held me close in his arms and protected me. Guess what?”

“What, Sweetheart?”

“I didn’t pee in my panties!” For the first time since I can remember, I didn’t pee in my panties!

“Sean makes me feel so special and tingly all over and I feel that he loves me and would never be mean to me. When I sit on his lap and he holds me, it feels like no one in the world will ever hurt me again.

“I’m not afraid with Sean. I truly believe that if I had an accident and went pee-pee in my panties, Sean would still love me and not hate me. I hope you don’t hate me, Auntie, but I have to admit that I’ve been a naughty girl.”

Mom gave her a mock look of being a little angry and asked her, “I won’t hate you, Aleeya, but how have you been a naughty girl?”

“Well, at Priya’s henna party, I heard you and Priya talking about…. about secret things.”

“What secret things?”

“”You know, those things that mommies and daddies do?”

“Oh, those secret things; and what did you hear?”

“You know, you told her it was okay to be shy to show Sean her boobies and her…. her…. pee-pee. And that she wouldn’t feel shy if she really loved him. That it’s okay because Sean will make her feel safe.”

“That’s right I did tell her that. When a man and a woman get married, they don’t feel ashamed or shy because they love each other. A good girl will only show her body to the man she loves.”

“You were right, Sean saw my body, well… not all of me, I had my panties on, but he saw me — even my bottom — and I wasn’t shy at all! I felt so close to him as he held me in his arms, and I wasn’t scared at all! I felt like I belonged there and that he was the only one in the world who could protect me.”

“Is that why you want to marry him?

“Yes, Priya said that maybe someday, she’ll share him with me. Besides, I have to marry him now.”

“Why’s that, Sweetheart?”

“Don’t you see, Auntie? He just has to marry me now, only my husband is supposed to see me nakie like that!”

“The word is naked,” Mom corrected. “Let’s pretend for a minute, okay? What if you were to marry Sean? You’d have to take all of your clothes off and then he’d see your little pee-pee. How do you feel about that?”

“Does Sean see Priya’s pee-pee all the time?”

“Yes, Aleeya, Sean sees Priya’s pee-pee all the time.”

“I wouldn’t be afraid. Sean makes me feel safe and loved and I know he would never be ashamed of me or hurt me and do bad or dirty things to me.”

“But, Honey,” Mom added, “those things you think are bad and dirty are bad and dirty if little girls your age let others do these things, but they’re things Allah has allowed husbands and wives to do. They’re not dirty or bad if you’re married and you do them with your husband. Allah lets husbands and wives do those things because He gives them a special, secret love to do these things in secret.”

“What things?”

“They’re secret things. We’re not supposed to talk about them unless we are married. If you were getting married, I could try to help explain the secret ways husbands and wives show each other their special love.”

“Oh… would Priya and you let me marry Sean too? We could both be his wife and Priya and Sean could teach me these… secret things?”

“I’m not sure, Baby. You’re very young and your body is very small. Little girls your age aren’t supposed to get married until they get older.”

“I’ll be five next month, will that be old enough?”

“You should really wait until you can have babies.”

“Oh please, Auntie, I can’t wait that long! Mommy will hurt me too much by then.”

“Why don’t you tell your Daddy? He loves you and wouldn’t let that happen to you.”

“Daddy can’t watch me all day long, every day. He works very hard and men think taking care of little kids is a woman’s job.”

“Can’t you stay with an aunt or someone else to look after you until you’re older?”

“Our family is poor. Uncle Adib is the richest in our family. Sometimes, we don’t even have enough food to eat. Mommy can’t spend money to buy me new clothes. She said it’s a waste of money because I wet myself all the time and she doesn’t have time to wash all my, my, she calls them ‘my pissy clothes.’”

“I see…”

“Do these secret things that mommies and daddies do hurt?”

“Sometimes, when you do them the first time, but you have a tiny body and you aren’t able to do these things yet. All I can say, not to scare you, is that if your husband is very gentle and loves you, it’s a ‘beautiful hurt.’”

“What’s a beautiful hurt?”

“It’s very hard to explain; it’s like having a baby. When a woman has a baby, there is a pain so great, Allah has to help a woman bear it to bring her baby into the world, but when that baby is born all that pain becomes a beautiful thing. But when the time comes for it happen for you, you’ll know what I mean.”

“Sean just has to marry me, he wasn’t ashamed of me: he accepted me. He’s already seen me, what’d you say, nekkid?

“No dear, the word is nay-kid: naked.”

“Well, he’s already seen me, so you’ve got to let him marry me. Will you help me?”

“We’ll talk about it later, I promise, okay?”

“Oh all right, but you know he’s just got to, otherwise I’ll be what Mommy said would happen to girls like me.”

Mom, not knowing what she meant, asked her, “What did your Mommy said would happen to a girl like you?”

“She said girls like me turn out to be little pissy whores that can’t control themselves.”

Mom just hugged her and cried.

Mom called me on my cell when she and Aleeya came home from the park to tell me the three of us had to talk and that she’d have to put finishing planning Priya’s party off until tomorrow when Aleeya was back home. Mom was gearing up to leave and was planning a big birthday party for Priya at our house. Priya invited most of her relatives and was secretly planning on the side to be a combination send-off for Mom and Priya’s party.

While sitting in my office, I began to have flashes of vignettes of my mother from the last few months. I recalled that night I met Priya with her hustling around the kitchen without noticing I was watching her. I remembered that was the first time I looked at my mother through a man’s eyes. Her mature beauty and figure made me proud to have such a lovely woman as my mother.

I recalled her laugh: the way she’d throw her head back and let it flow so easily, her schoolgirl giddiness and giggles, and her completely overcome with laughter. I laughed out loud when I remembered her slipping to the floor pissing herself in a laughing fit the night of Priya’s henna party.

I recalled her intuitive women’s sixth sense when she spoke seriously, like that day in the park when she cried softly in a melancholy way as we talked. Again, when she bolstered me up in the kitchen after first meeting Priya; her advice to me on my wedding night, but most touching to me was when she recently tried to reflect back the love she had for my child bride with her heartfelt words for Priya to look to the future.

Someone once said to pay attention to what people say for there are many truths revealed in jest. I now realized for the first time, my Mom had let me go. She had been treating me as a man and not her little boy by joking about sex with Priya and me. She was showing me the adult married woman by sharing a tiny glimpse at her sexuality.

I cried at these small glimpses of a woman that I had throughout my childhood taken for granted. Going through life thinking of her as sort of a non entity: she was just Mom… Yeah, just Mom, and I now saw and felt exactly what those three letters truly meant. Oh God, I’m gonna miss her!

I got on the phone and called Dad. We talked business for a few minutes when I asked him if he knew of good custom jeweler here in New Delhi. He gave me the man’s name as I explained I wanted to get Mom something special as a going away present.

“I’m really proud of you, Son. Proud of the way you’re handling things for me there, but I’m most proud that you have come to see just how special your mother really is.”

“I know, Dad. I’ve been seeing her a lot in my mind lately and seeing it more and more. I’m gonna miss her and so is Priya.”

“Yeah, she’s special all right. Don’t be too sad, you’ve got that mini dynamo as my proxy with you! Ha, ha, Priya will keep you busy I suspect. By the way, how is my little ‘chip off the ‘ole block’ anyway?”

“Priya’s fine, Dad. She passed the eleventh grade in one term and will graduate at the end of the year. Sarah’s doing well also.”

“God that wife of yours is so smart, it’s frightening! How’s married life?”

“It’s great, Dad. I can’t imagine my life without her.”

“I know the feeling. I really miss your mom.”

“And she’s missing you. She joked the other night that she’s horny as hell so watch out. Try not to let her give you a coronary.”

He chuckled and replied, “I know how she feels and she may be she may walking funny when you see her next.”

“Dad, that’s a little more information than I need.”

“Sorry, Son, it must be them there hormones or pheromones or whatever they’re called talking.”

I made a lame joke by responding, “Yeah, they won’t quiet down until somebody moans, right?”

Dad laughed and said, “You got it!”

We spoke for a few minutes more and said goodbye. I then called the jeweler and asked him if he could custom make me what I wanted, and he said no problem. I gave him my credit card info and hung up.

I left the office in time to pick the girls up from school. When the girls got in the car, they acted funny. They huddled together, whispering and occasionally looking at me giggling with hand-covered mouths. I just sat back and watched them carry on. When we dropped off Haseeba and Sarah, as Sarah was exiting the car, she grinned at me shaking her finger at me and said, “You’re a very naughty man!” and trotted to the house.

Closing the car door, I looked at Priya puzzled and asked her, “What was that all about?”

She grinned, giggled and said; “They know you like bald pussied, little girls!”

“You told them?”

“No, silly, they were with me, remember?”

“Oh well,” I sighed, “I guess the cat’s outta the bag.”

Giggling she replied, “Yes it is, and de-furred too!”

Laughing I said to her, “You are a nasty little girl!”

“You trained me, remember? You ravaged and defiled me and corrupted my innocence.”

I laughed and said, “I’m proud of myself. I think I did a damn good job, don’t you?

“Wanna get nasty with me?” she purred.

“I’m at your command, Princess.”

“Then suck my toes until we get home.”

And I did just that (tickling her coochie a few times to make it interesting).

When we got home, as soon as I was in the door I hugged Mom tenderly and kissed her cheek. She returned my gesture by giving me a peck on the cheek and asked, “What’s that for?”

“I love you, Mom, just because I love you.”

She looked at me like I’d gone daffy and replied, “I love you too, Son.”

As soon as Mom and I separated, a streaking little waif bounded up into my arms. I didn’t know a kid that small could jump so high!

Aleeya hugged me in a strangle hold and was giving me pecking kisses all over my face and said, “I missed you so much!”

Laughing, I replied, “I missed you too, Squirt! Now, let me go so I can get cleaned up for dinner.”

“Okay, can I watch?”

Looking at Priya for approval, Priya nodded and said, “Come on girl, we’ll all get cleaned up and then we’ll say prayers, okay”

“Okay,” she said, “Let’s go.”

Priya, Aleeya and I freshened up, said evening prayers and we ate dinner a little early. Priya said that she was going over to Mahmoud’s to discuss Aleeya’s situation.

After dinner when Priya was getting ready to leave, Aleeya was watching TV and the three of us stepped into the study and I asked Priya, “Priya, seriously, what are we going to do about Aleeya?”

“I’m not sure yet, Sean. Things have taken a shockingly unexpected turn”

”What do you have planned? I asked her.

“The only thing I can think of at the moment is to talk to Uncle Mahmoud and try to find out exactly what’s going on. I suspect he has no idea what Aleeya’s been subjected to. If Aleeya is in any danger because of Aunt Tallie’s recent behavior, we’ll have to work something out that insures Aleeya’s safety.”

“What about Aleeya’s childish fantasy about marrying me?”

“Sean, you have to think of things in terms you’re not familiar with. You don’t know my family that well. All you see is the side everyone wants to project. Aleeya has always been an unwanted child. In Muslim culture, a boy child is considered a continuation of the family seed and therefore has preferred status to girls. Uncle Mahmoud loves her as his child, but desperately wishes she were a boy. They married when Aunt Tallie was ten, and she gave birth at twelve. Her pregnancy and giving birth at such a young age ruined her for any more children. Aleeya appears to be a happy and contented child on the outside, but she’s looking for the same acceptance I sought, only for different reasons. What those reasons are, I’m not sure of because we girls aren’t allowed to discuss such things.”

“Tallie’s only sixteen? My gosh she looks like she’s in her twenties.”

“Life’s been hard on her and Uncle Mahmoud hasn’t made it any easier on her. Uncle Mahmoud is a good and loving man, but he thinks and acts like most Muslim men. My father has never thought that having girls was a curse from God and he’s loved us unconditionally. Uncle Mahmoud is jealous of him because my father has attained a measure of success. I believe that it’s because my father is an honest and upright man that Allah has blessed us.”

Mom interrupted and said, “While we were at the park today, Aleeya and I had a very revealing conversation. She basically told me what Priya just said about her home life, and that the poor child doesn’t even feel safe in her own home.

“Her mother beats her for wetting herself when she’s frighten and she’s so scared in her own home, she’s terrified to be alone at night and wets the bed, for which she gets berated and beaten. The poor child lives in a continuous cycle of fear and abuse. Her mother has convinced her she’ll grow up to be, and I’m using Aleeya’s own words, ‘A pissy whore who cannot control herself.’ Mahmoud doesn’t know any of this and thinks the bruises are just from her being a clumsy girl.

“Priya hit the nail on the head when she said Aleeya has a special affection for you, Sean, but it’s because she intuitively feels safe and protected with you. She somehow knows you won’t let anything bad happen to her. She feels a deep and genuine protective safety in your arms.

“Priya, this is not a simple childish crush she feels, but a definite loving bond. I was so astonished and amazed at how methodically she was able to express her feelings and that even at four, she feels she’s found what all women dream of: namely, someone who can accept her - even if she makes a mistake and wets herself, Sean would cherish her unconditionally.

She also has the religious conviction that now that Sean has seen her nearly naked, her honor would be blemished if she didn’t marry him, reinforcing her mother’s insults that only a whore would show her nakedness to anyone but her husband. She also feels that because she loves Sean, she feels no shyness or shame in letting him see her in such an intimate way.”

Priya and I looked at each other in shock for a moment, and I asked Mom, “My God, Mom, how do we deal with this? How can we help Aleeya without shattering her spirit?”

“Sean, my heart just aches for her. I’ve rolled this over and over in my mind trying to figure out how she’s come to such a conclusion.

“When I was in college taking child psychology, I remember when we were discussing abused children with emotional problems. It’s been observed that no one: child, adolescent or adult will ever change or get better unless they believe that at least one person in their life accepts them; then and only then can recovery occur. They need to know that the mistakes they’ve made, or perceived to have made, and the ones they will make during their recovery won’t drive that person away.

“It’s always been a mystery to professionals how children of a very young age, who, despite a lack of conventional wisdom and maturity, intuitively formulate methods to protect their ‘child within’. This ‘child within’ is a term used in all fields of psychiatry - treatment for drug and alcohol abuse, physical, emotional and sexual abuse.

“This ‘child within” is a term referring to that pure spirit within us all whose sole purpose is to give and receive unconditional love. For whatever reason, Aleeya has instinctively decided that Sean can be trusted with her ‘child within’. True, she has no concept of what being married means, what the duties or responsibilities of a wife are, she only knows that a marriage means being bonded to someone for life, no matter what the problems of life throw at her. She would always have Sean if they were married.

“Children need a solid support system to endure great hardship. Look at children with terminal diseases. With the proper support, they show courage in dealing with the adult reality of death that many adults can never cope with. I have the feeling that she’s very close to an emotional breakdown if her life continues as it is.”

Looking at Mom, then at Priya, I asked them both, “Mom, Priya, just what can we do? Certainly, you can’t be suggesting I marry a four year-old baby? What of the legal issues, we haven’t even obtained Priya’s visa yet. What would happen if it were learned I’d married a four year-old? I’d go to jail and they’d throw away the key!

“Priya and I haven’t even started our own lives yet. I have a company to run, Priya has school to attend; she’s a baby for Christ sakes! She’d need a babysitter to watch her during the day while we were gone.

“What about our intimate life, Priya? How could we go to bed alone, with a child in need of constant affection and reassurance? I don’t really want to share my time with anyone else right mow. I need our intimacy more than ever!

“Just say, for argument’s sake I was to marry her. How would she react when we need time alone to be intimate? She’d feel left out and that I cared for Priya more that her. She’d again, be left to sleep in a bed by herself in order for us to share time together. What are we to do? Make love in plain sight of the girl right next to us? By what she’s revealed to you, Mom, she’s curious about the intimacy that married couples share. What are we supposed to do: introduce her to marital sex? My God! I doubt I could even penetrate her with my finger! This is ludicrous!”

Priya looked down and said, “Sean, you could give her pleasure without penetration.”

Inside, I was I utter turmoil. The beast had been quiet throughout this entire conversation, but the thought flashed through my mind of the night I fantasized I was taking Aleeya’s innocence and I shuddered at the thought. Somehow, Allah was giving me the strength to see things rationally and considering a child before my own demonic lust, but the feeling of having her began to slowly creep into my consciousness and I started to firm at the thought.

Mom said, “I’m heartbroken. I can’t imagine you taking another wife, Sean. For me, there’s only Priya. And to top it all off, having a four year-old baby as a ‘daughter-in-law’ just makes me weep inside. Priya, how could you even consider sharing your husband with your cousin?”

“I know this sounds strange, Mom,” she said softly,” But I know that the love Sean and I share will never be broken, even if Aleeya was his wife. Does that make any sense?”

“No,” Mom stated as she looked at her surprised. “The thought of my husband being with another woman would be more than I could bear.”

Just then, I saw Aleeya standing in the doorway. I looked at her and asked, “What is it, Aleeya? We’re having a private talk. Why don’t you go upstairs and take your bath, all right?”

“Okay,” she said, “but someone has to wash and dry my hair.”

I silently shuddered inside at the thought of running my hands over the miniature body of this child, touching her in all her secret places. I fought with myself to rise and take her for my pleasure, but Allah was gracious to me and quelled my beast.

“Okay, Sweetheart,” I replied, “someone will be up shortly.”

I looked at Priya and said, “You go and get her ready for bed, please.”

Priya looked at me and then Mom and said, “She wants you, Sean.”

“I just can’t,” I replied shaking my head. “I just can’t deal with that right now. Mom, if you saw that child’s body, you’d want to kill someone. Her tiny back and thighs are one big bruise and her tiny butt cheeks are actually black and blue” I started to tear up and Mom began to cry.

“Alright, I’ll do it.” Priya responded and left to attend to Aleeya.

Looking at Mom, I implored, “I need you, Mom. What am I to do? If I did marry her, Dad would disown me. He probably would never speak to me again.”

“Let’s think this through rationally,” she said.

“Rationally? What’s rational about marrying a preschool girl?” I retorted.

Mom, looking at me as if grasping at straws, said, “Stop it now. Take the emotion out of it. Now… we’re only specking hypothetically, but if you were to marry her, it would be a Muslim marriage, only. You would need a letter of guardianship from Mahmoud and Tallie. That way, legally, she’d be your ward and not your wife.”

“Yeah, and if it ever got out that I’d laid a finger on her naked body, I’d still rot in an Indian prison!”

“That’s if Aleeya told someone, which I don’t think she would if you explained the danger of anyone finding out. You could get her a U.S. visa as a minor child, such as an adopted daughter.”

“Mom, Dad will figure things out eventually.”

“I think I can handle your father when the time comes, maybe in about ten years.”

‘Dad’s no fool. I don’t think we can lie to Dad for ten years and get away with it. Besides, do you want to lie to Dad and keep something like this from him?”

“I believe that I can handle your father, whenever the time comes to tell him. But you’re absolutely right. I couldn’t live a lie with your father.”

“But Mom, you’re asking me to live a life of lies.”

“Some lies are worth living for, Sean. You wouldn’t really have to lie; just not let the outside world know your personal business for Aleeya’s protection and to give her a life of love and acceptance.”

“What are you saying, Mom?”

“Let me tell you a story about your father. Until this day, no one has ever known about this and don’t tell your father I’ve told you. When he was serving as a squad leader in Viet Nam, your father killed an American officer. He executed him by shooting him in the head. They were out on a search and destroy mission and came upon a hamlet that was suspected to be a staging point for VC sympathizers. They rounded up all the men and women in the center of the village and selectively shot many of them after finding caches of weapons and ammunition.

“After the shooting ended, a little girl ran towards her dead mother and this officer shot the little girl. The officer, high on drugs, made the remark that he was going to fuck the child before she got cold. He then proceeded to rape the dead child’s body.

“Not wanting any part of this, the other men left leaving the officer abusing the dead girl’s corpse. When the others were out of sight, your father shot him in the head, killing him. Your father did what every other man in his outfit wanted to do, but didn’t. It was never reported and the officer was reported killed in action.

“I’m not condoning or passing judgment on what your father did, but I believe he was right in doing what he did. Does that make your father a murderer? Only God will judge his actions, but I believe he did the wrong thing for the right reason.”

“I never would have believed Dad could do that, he loves life so much.” I said sadly to Mom.

“Even in war, Son, your father tried to conduct himself with honor. Even though he feels to this day, he brought a measure of justice to a dead child whose name he never knew, it still haunts him. Your father treasures children and he believes that a child deserves to find at least someone who can provide a measure of hope and happiness in their life.

“I had a feeling in the park that day we sat and talked that I would lose you to this land and I now believe that your place in life is here.

“That little girl loves you, not with the all encompassing love and passion as Priya, but she sees you as her shelter from the world. I can’t tell you what to do, Son, that’s between Priya and you. Listen to her and let her guide you. If anyone can make this right for you, her and Aleeya, it’s Priya.

“I’ll support you however the two of you decide. If I gain a baby for a daughter-in-law, I’ll accept and love her as one of your wives and a daughter. Let Priya set the tone and follow her direction as to how your lives will be from now on. I’ll delay going back to the States until this whole thing is worked out. I have called your father though; this is too important not to include him in.”

“Okay, Mom, I need to think… I’m going to the veranda.”

“Good night, Son, I love you, and always will.”

“Thanks, Mom, I love you too.”