A Search for a Pun
by Arty

Things were not going well, his Story Fest story though
plotted and coming along reasonably well, was beginning to
seem clichéd to him. Unfortunately it was another
angst-ridden piece and his muse was getting pissed with him.

"I thought I ordered humour with a side-order of laughter?
Where did all these tears come from?"

"I'm sorry, I don't know where it comes from…"

"You're not seeing another Muse on the side are you?"

"No I…"

"If you are I might have to see about removing these." She
gave my balls a little squeeze and resumed licking my cock.
I did so love these Author/Muse meetings, but it always put
me in a vulnerable position, especially if I'd done
something to irritate her, which was more often than I'd
have liked.

"Hmmm, as if I would. Chocolate would never taste the same."

"And don't you forget it." More sucking from her and panting
from me and then she stopped and stood up leaving my cock
glistening with her saliva. "Now that I have your undivided
attention, I will reiterate the requirements: fun, laughter
and sex, lots of sex."

"Yes, dear."

"Good" She kissed me and for a while things were quiet with
the silence broken only by the increasing noise from her
fluttering wings. Eventually oxygen starvation caused us to
part.

"Wow!" we both exclaimed as we fell back on the increasingly
convenient and unlikely bed that was the feature of our
trysts. Turnabout was only fair and I slid myself down the
bed and stuck my head in one of my favourite places -
between her legs and set about returning the favour. I
seemed to have been successful, if the screams and moans
were anything to go by.

"Of course this isn't getting the piece written."

"What piece?"

"The one that was 'One Night Stands', 'Tales of the FK
Lounge', 'Just For Arty', and 'The Program', all mixed
together. You dared me to write one, remember?"

"Oh that. If it's giving you problems, don't worry about
it."

"I'm not, I just thought I try and think of a pun to get me
started."

"What sort of pun?"

"I don't know one with a Muse in it, probably."

"Just a minute."

Friday concentrated for a moment and suddenly there were two
of them in the room, each of them stared hungrily at his
cock. I looked in mock horror, two Fridays! Was the world
ready for this? I was jerked from my reverie by the
simultaneous thump of two fists hitting each of my arms.

"Ow! What was that for?"

"You forget we can read your mind." The two of them spoke
together and the effect was startling.

"Oh" The thought of the two of them working on me had
possibilities…

"Think of boring things for a moment will you? I want to
talk to Friday and I can do without the distraction of your
erotic fantasies."

"Exactly. Now where were we?"

"He wants a pun."

"A clever one, no doubt."

"I don't know why, no one will believe that he came up with
a clever pun on his own."

"Oi! Do you mind? Who came with 'Knights in White Satin'?"

"Exactly! Now belt up and let us think."

Suddenly the alternate Friday frowned for a while and then
the room behind her started to fill with smaller versions of
Friday.

"What the hell is that?"

"Haven't you ever heard of Quantmuse computers?"

"Not exactly, what's going to happen."

"Well Friday over there will create as many version of
Friday as necessary until the problem is solved. Meanwhile
you can get back to the important business of satisfying
your Muse."

"Yes, dear." Sometimes there are times to argue, but when
there are a several hundred versions of your muse in the
same room as you, isn't one of them.

"I'm glad you know what's good for you."

Things had cooled down a little so I started in where I had
left off. I.e. driving her wild with my tongue. I think some
of her passion leaked over to where Friday2 was
orchestrating the quantmuse computer as I could hear the
sound of several thousand tiny muses each of whom seemed to
be having a good time. After a while Friday grabbed my ears.
And spoke between pants.

"You, in, me, now."

Always do as a naked and panting muse tells you, is one of
my many mottos - perhaps I should make a list? And so I did.
I scooted upwards and entered her in a single, gentle
thrust. This was always the best part for me, the first
entry, so welcoming, so warm, so good, so…

"Stop soliloquising and start doing some work will ya!"

"Bloody, philistine Yank." I muttered and kissed her to stop
the inevitable follow-up. At the same time I thrust strongly
and she forgot about insult to her cultural heritage.

[Yeah right! Culture? Big Macs and George W. Bush]

[Oh shut up, it's just getting interesting.]

[Of course it is. Have you thought of that pun yet?]

[Not yet. Though there are only four or five million of me
working on it.]

[Four or five MILLION?]

[Yes, don't shout. It's distracting.]

[I'll tell you what's distracting. Distracting is the
thought of four or five million Fridays unleashed on the
world.]

[Six million.]

[SIX… what's that acronym? Oh yes E.L.E Extinction Level
Event.]

[Seven million.]

[Where do you put them all anyway?]

[They're not all that big, and we do have all these
fictional universes to play in. Like fairytales, Goldilocks
and the Three Bears that sort of thing.]

[Won't Goldilocks get a bit concerned when several million
copies of you suddenly invade her private space? (And did
you know that 'Goldilocks' is in the Micro$haft dictionary?
I mean how often does someone type 'Goldilocks' for crying
out loud?)]

[I don't think so, anyway I have it on good authority that
Goldilocks is a bit of a goer and wouldn't be averse to some
hot, girl-on-girl action.]

[I thought she was into fur?]

[Well we do have that in common at least, I'm sure I can
parlay that into mutual attraction. Anyway enough of this I
need some more sex and this isn't it]

I brought my arms one at a time to behind her knees and
lifted each leg so that my penetration was at maximum. [A
guy has to make the most of his equipment you know.] Friday
groaned at the increased depth that this position afforded.
Sweat was gathering between her breasts, I leant forward and
licked it off her; it was divine and, like everything else
about her, tasted faintly of chocolate. With a sigh I moved
my head and latched onto a nipple and bit down gently. The
extra stimulation caused her to tip over into another
climax. I continued to thrust gently as she recovered and
then she husked into my ear.

"Your turn. Cum for me, cum in your Muse."

I could never resist her when she spoke like that, nor when
she concentrated on massaging my cock with her pussy. My
thrusting increased in speed and then lost its regular
cadence as I neared by climax. I could her whispering to me.

"Cum, cum, cum…"

And I did, yelling my release and finally collapsing onto
her.

[Sorry didn't mean to squash you.]

[Uhhh, that's OK, sorry I got a bit distracted there;
Goldilocks is definitely good at pussy eating.]

[I thought you were working on my pun.]

[I got a bit sidetracked.]

[Ah bit?]

[You try keeping track of the activities of eight million
muses.]

[You've released eight million horny muses onto an
unsuspecting multiverse?]

[Looks like it.]

[Did they come up with a pun?]

[Nope.]

[Ah hell,I think I'll have to go with my first thought.]

[What's that?]

[A muse meant accolade]

[Groan.]

[Now all I have to do is think of a story.]

-Fin-

--
http://www.asstr.org/~arty