Note: This story was dynamically reformatted for online reading convenience. Trainee Nurse ============ Chapter 2 - Cathy Before we continue relating Cathy's interview with Mr Reynolds, there are some details the reader must know about Cathy and her upbringing in order to make sense of events. This is because Cathy and her past are both sufficiently unusual that if the reader attempts to 'live' these events as interpreted from their own experience, they will be misled. Cathy was born with a highly pronounced clitoris, that even at birth projected like a tiny penis considerably past the labia of her otherwise normal genitals. Her parents were strongly religious, and declined medical recommendations that her 'abnormality' (as the doctors called it) be surgically corrected soon after birth. The doctors had tut-tutted, and explained that 'clitoro-megaly' occured in perhaps one female newborn in a thousand, and conventional medical wisdom advised early surgical cosmetic correction in order to avoid potential embarrassment and other 'sexually related' difficulties later in life. The operation was routine and safe, they said, and performed on infants many times each year across the country, without any complications. However her parents had stood their ground, invoked God's mysterious ways, and inisted the righteous should not question or attempt to defeat His purpose. Her father died in a car accident (other driver drunk) when she was 2, so she doesn't remember him at all. Her mother had raised Cathy very strictly, and had very firmly forbidden Cathy from ever 'touching herself in her naughty place.' Watched like a hawk even as a baby, Cathy had been immediately punished any time her hands had strayed anywhere near her crotch. Her hands would be slapped sharply away, and any sign of persistence would bring her a spanking on her bare bottom. Her mother was also quite obsessive about cleanliness - when bathing Cathy even as a baby, she would pay particular attention to the child's crotch - and the large clitoris. Which from earliest infancy would swell in response to being stroked with a washcloth, oiled, or rubbed with talcum powder. Her mother found this quite unsettling, taking it as an indication that Cathy was prone to carnal tendencies. Consequently becoming even more watchful and strict in her punishments of any 'naughty touching'. As well as going to greater lengths to ensure that area was always very well cleaned and 'irritations' prevented by daily application of skin creams and oils, worked well into the skin around the vulva and on the clitoris itself. So Cathy had grown up deeply conditioned to never touch herself for pleasure. Even past the age of 10 her mother had still bathed Cathy entirely herself, and continued her practice of either oiling or powdering Cathy's genitals after a bath, with particular attention paid to Cathy's 'so easily irritated' overgrown clitoris. As Cathy approached her teens this would be tinglingly erect more and more often, and invariably became rigidly swollen during Cathy's bath even before her mother's disapproving ministrations with oils and powders after drying her off. Cathy was also quite used to painful spankings for any display of 'lustful' behaviour during this process. About all she could get away with was a deepening of her breathing - any kind of squirming or sighing would earn her a spanking and heaven forbid she make any move to touch the achy throbbing center of 'sinful urges' between her legs, or moan as her mother massaged oil into the rigidly engorged fleshy finger projecting so obscenely from her puffy-lipped slit. At around the age of twelve, her mother had decided to see if Cathy could be trusted to perform her own bathing and toilet duties in the future. And so began an even more strict regime, in which her mother would closely supervise and instruct Cathy in wiping, drying, oiling, etc, all with an absolute minimum of touching, and quite severe punishments for 'lingering'. Her mother lectured her over and over on the vital necessity of refusing the Devil's temptations, and how any kind of unnessesary contact with her 'nasty places' could only make the disturbing sensations and desires worse. How if she succumbed to those urges, her soul would be damned and her body doomed to a rapid decay into decadence and illness. Any time her mother felt Cathy had lingered too long with her oiling, she would administer a practical demonstration to Cathy of how the feelings would just get worse and worse with excessive touching - her mother would carefully rub her oiled fingers over the throbbing hard clitoris, till Cathy was panting and writhing in an unbearable aching haze of powerful, indescribable sensations, as if her entire body was in a fever. "There, you see? That's what happens if you succumb. When you marry you'll have to endure such torment and worse to satisfy your husband's carnal desires. But till then may God grant you the wisdom and strength to avoid these temptations of the flesh." After which, Cathy usually receive a sound spanking for letting her body behave so lustfully, followed by her mother re-applying the lotions that had got rubbed off during the spanking. Her intent had been to allow Cathy to take over her own hygene. However Cathy's body now invariably became highly aroused soon before her regular bath times, and neither of them knew about Pavlovian conditioning. So Cathy's mother interpreted it as the girl's 'carnal anticipation of genital touching' - of _wanting_ to touch herself, while Cathy denied this, and her mother took her denials as evidence the girl could not be trusted to tell the truth. Also, she often felt that Cathy took liberties with her necessary hygene - an oiled finger pressed too deeply or lingering too long between her labia, too much rubbing of moisturising cream into swollen labia or stroking it too firmly along her rigid stand-out clit. So it had continued - despite having been coached in personal hygene and resistance of her body's urges, her mother continued to closely supervise Cathy during bath and toilet times, going on into Cathy's teen years. As she developed into puberty new dimensions of the 'woman's suffering' arrived - her breasts grew full and their nipples began echoing the oversensitive swollen torments between her legs. Her periods began, and as if the monthly pains and mess were not enough, her clitoris seemed to become possessed by the devil himself. Now it would choose any seemingly random moment of the day or night to suddenly swell into distracting throbbing stiffness that would continue relentlessly tormenting her for hours or sometimes even days. At such times her nipples would also harden, standing out like the tips of her little fingers from her breasts. Both her clitoris and nipples had grown in size along with the dark hair sprouting between her legs and under her arms, and also become far more sensitive to irritations from the cloth of her clothing. Given the size of her clitoris even when not erect and before it grew bigger in her early teens, Cathy's mother had always had to make modifications to things like the onepiece bathing suits she wore to the beach. In her childhood, there'd been a firm layer of coarse felt-like material sewn into the crotch, to hide the shaming bump her clit made when it stiffened under ordinary swimsuits. Cathy loved going to the beach, but didn't so much enjoy those visits when her clit had hardened and grated for hours against the scratchy, wet inner lining. With her puberty, this problem had grown much worse. For one thing her clit had enlarged and strengthened in it's erections so much that a simple stiff pad was no longer sufficient to hide it. The entire pad would be pushed outwards, looking quite noticably odd. Worse, with the increased sensitivity and tendency to spontaneous arousals, she'd find herself achingly stiff and aroused within minutes of donning the swimsuit, and most uncomfortable with her rigid clitoris bent over under the coarse pad material. Also now with her nipples there was the added problem of needing reinforced bra cups, with a similar discomfort and irritation as her crotch. Of course her mother noticed the changes and decided that Cathy should not be allowed to go to the beach unchaperoned. Around age 13, when her friends were starting to go to the beach in groups without their parents, Cathy was forbidden to go to the beach unless accompanied by her mother. Even worse, around 15 Cathy again attempted to get permission to go to the beach with friends, and received another of mother's disapproving lectures about the increasing frequency of Cathy's carnal thoughts, judging by how often she noticed Cathy getting aroused even in house clothes. Cathy laid the blame for her worsening erections of the rubbing of the cloth against her clitoris and nipples, and mentioned that this was happening a lot to her lately with ordinary clothes, for the same reason. This was a mistake. Her mother got the idea in her head that Cathy needed to be even more closely monitored for carnality. She began doing spot checks several times a day, in which Cathy was required to present her bare breasts and crotch. Much to her mother's consternation it transpired that Cathy was indeed found to be in heat during many of these inspections. Obviously, more serous disciplinary measures were called for. So began an interval of nearly a year, in which Cathy would be inspected frequently during non-school days and evenings, and given a sound spanking every time she was found to be aroused. The inspections also became routine at bedtime and again in the morning. Rather than a spanking just before bed, if found to be aroused Cathy would be tied spreadeagled into bed. After a few months of this, what with Cathy's arousal every bathtime, and often still being aroused later at bedtime, her mother changed the arrangements for simplicity. She made Cathy take her daily bath just before bed, and then tied the girl into bed every night. She'd also heard that a couple of girls in Cathy's year at school had become pregnant. Cathy was very rarely allowed to go out with friends, but the pregnancies weighed on her mother's mind and so she began checking Cathy's 'intactness' every night once the girl was tied down in bed. She also switched the application of oil and skin creme from in the bathroom, till when Cathy was spread on her back in bed, since this was more convenient. Especially since she now also applied lotion to the girl's breasts and particularly her nipples. In addition it saved her the effort of having to spank Cathy when the girl failed to control her squirming during the oiling, since she accepted it was pointless to spank the girl just before trying to go to sleep, and she'd come to realise that the girl was just too carnally inclined to be able to hold completely still for this. Besides, dropping the requirement for Cathy to hold quite still meant she could be much more thorough in her ministrations, and make sure to work the creams in well everywhere. There was another side effect too. She was becoming exceedingly vexed with the girl's perpetual disappointing failure to control her urges, and she had to admit, there was a distinctly vindicating element to seeing her daughter's slutty nature rise to the surface, the girl's body twisting and bucking like some whore under a man, whimpering and moaning with her surely carnal thoughts. All for the trifle of her own mother's hands innocently applying some soothing lotion to the swollen, irritated genitals, and probing carefully against the girl's intact virginity. The whole thing was so... outrageous! It made her own pulse beat like a drum, and since she'd decided that prolonging the activity was a most appropriate punishment for all the times she discovered the girl indulging her carnality during the day, with that freakish clitoris of hers sticking out provocatively like an erect penis... well! The ungrateful girl deserves the discomfort, and plenty of it. She also finds that the activity makes her perfomance in her own bed later of her dear late husband's last wishes far more satisfactory. Bless him for such thoughtfulness on his deathbed! Soon after Cathy's 16th birthday, Liz decides that since Cathy so often turns out to be aroused when inspected, and since Cathy keeps insisting that it's only due to her clothes rubbing on her sensitive parts, that another tack should be tried. Liz orders Cathy to remain naked at all times when inside the house and rear yard. The yard is enclosed and private, with a high stone fence and surrounding bush. The new rule is that Cathy will be spanked any time she is seen to be aroused. If she comes to her mother and reports her arousal immediately, it will be two smacks. If she is discovered in arousal without having reported it to Liz, she will receive 10 smacks. In either case, while remaining aroused she must stay in her mother's sight. As long as her arousal remains, she will receive another two smacks every half hour. Surprisingly, this arrangement works out quite well. After a slow start, in which Cathy keeps trying to hide her frequent arousals but keeps getting caught, she learns that it is better to front up to Liz whenever her clit stiffens. The experience of invariably getting at least two painful smacks every time her sex stirs, actually does start to reduce the frequency of her daytime arousals. After six months she is sometimes going for several days without a spanking. On the other hand, her arousals during the 'going to bed' routine are becoming ever more intense and persistent, as are the times when she does experience a spontaneous daytime arousal. Liz feels that the nights Cathy is unable to sleep due to 'naughty thoughts' are bad for her school work, and to help her get to sleep Liz knits her a clit-cozy from prickly wool. This is a woollen tube with a closed end, that slips snugly over Cathy's erect clit. At the base there are tie-strings that go between her legs and also up in front to a waist tie, to hold it in place. When her clit is erect and pressing tightly inside the hot woolly tube, it is quite uncomfortable. It also prevents her clit rubbing against the bedsheets on nights too cold for her to sleep uncovered. Both help her arousal to subside faster, thus allowing her to sleep. Meanwhile, Cathy's pubic hair has been growing in, and by her 17th birthday is quite a thick, dark mass. It obscures her sex fairly well, and when fluffed up almost obscures her clitoris unless it is at it's most extended. Cathy starts to shirk telling Liz whenever she's starting to get aroused, and it doesn't take Liz long to cotton on. Liz decides that her daughter's pubic hair is an obstacle to careful monitoring. So one evening she uses a permanent depiliatory cream on Cathy's sex before her shower. Liz finds the idea an immediate success - she's absolutely shocked at how many times Cathy must have been hiding her arousals in that hair, judging by how often she finds the girl aroused once her pubes are laid completely bare. She had thought the girl was making progress against her sinful lusts, but now realises the problem is worsening seriously. Liz imposes some new rules - she requires Cathy to stand in a 'presenting' pose when administering spankings for arousals. The girl must stand with her legs wide apart, and pubes thrust forward. Her mother uses a wooden spatula to spank her directly on her sex for 'caught' arousals, and still hand spanks her bottom for admitted arousals. The spatula is harsher on the skin, so she also adds a rub-in of healing cream after each sex-spanking. Of course, since the girl is still in pain at the time, she relaxes her rule that Cathy must remain silent and motionless during lotion application. This too works well, since now Liz is able to apply the lotion much more thoroughly, and for longer, while being sure to avoid anything 'sexual' such as an accidental orgasm. She becomes quite a practiced expert at judging which of the girl's bestial contortions and moanings indicate a too-close approach to the unthinkably forbidden sin of unwedded sexual climax. It's all for the best, since the more confident Liz becomes of her ability to judge when to pause for a while to avoid risk of Cathy having an orgasm, the more efficiently and carefully she can apply the creams. For several months after the depiliation, Liz almost despairs of saving Cathy from the Devil's lusts. It seems as if the girl has no sooner received one chastisement, than she is found in sin again, her clitoris standing stiffly from her sex. Some days seem like a never ending round of punishments of the girl, who's genitals seems possessed by some perverted demon. But eventually, Liz gains the upper hand, and Cathy becomes able to go for longer and longer intervals without sinning. Despite her unusual home life Cathy graduates high school at 18, and decides she wants to try nursing. She enrols in a three year course, still living at home when not at school. She is now allowed to wear clothes at home much of the time, though Liz had noticed that Cathy is much more prone to her arousals towards the end of her period cycle, so for about one week in four Cathy is still required to go naked all the time when home. With her retiring lifestyle she has become quite studious, and does well in her course. By now her spontaneous arousals rarely happen at other times in the month, though when they _do_ occur their persistence has become strong enough that the half-hourly spanking seems to have little effect. Liz finds that making Cathy don the prickly clit-cozy any time her clit erects still achieves results, so this becomes routine directly after the initial spanking. From her studies, Cathy has learnt about male and female sexuality and orgasm, yet was confronted with the obvious difference between her own genital development and other females. In addition she had the conflict between the medical knowledge, and the teachings of the church from her Sunday school classes, and also her mother. She had realised that she was rather different, and prone to carnal urges apparently much greater than most women, perhaps in proportion to the size difference of her clitoris. She also accepted the church teachings that masturbation was sinful, and that intercourse and orgasm (whatever that was) were reserved for marriage. So she accepted in an abstract kind of way that her admittedly odd home life was probably necessary and for her benefit, and that she should be grateful to her mother for all her efforts. She's always been very self-conscious about her abnormality, and has never discussed it with any of her friends and doesn't want to. For one thing that would lead into other topics, like her frequent spontaneous arousals, the home nudity, her punishments for arousal, and most of all, her bedtime routine. Which.... she tries to avoid thinking about at all, because invariably when she thinks about it, her clit will spring into aching hardness, and stay that way until she can get her hair-shirt clit-cozy onto it. She pushes the thoughts out of her head now. Every evening she has ample opportunity to consider the matter, when lying tied spread eagled on her back, the prickly cozy tight on her aching organ, waiting with every part of her body still throbbing and tingling with the effects her mother's massaging fingers built into a bonfire that drives her mind into whirling fragments. It is such an agonising torment, and yet... yet she knows she desires it, and this desire is sinful and deserving of punishment. Any punishment, but especially *this* punishment! Her mother's efforts take Cathy's own sinful urges and turn them around into a blinding intensity of wanting that is worse even than the severest of spankings. She knows she deserves this! She deserves it a lot! She's a nasty, libidinous girl, and her mother should punish her severely. So each night she thrusts and twists her body like a wanton madwoman, both ashamed of her desires and simultaneously flaunting them at her mother, knowing it inflames her mother and goads her to continue, to 'torment' her more, to stroke harder and deeper into her daughter's rebelliously demanding sex, to fan the excruciating excitement until it feels like her brain is going to explode. Until her sex feels like it might burst, or implode or something. Until... until... she finds it hard to imagine anything more intense. Perhaps that 'orgasm' thing may be, but from the descriptions in her sex education class it sounds rather scary and dangerously addictive. Besides, the deeper purpose of all this effort her mother is giving her is to fortify her will, to help her resist the demands of her over-sexed body leading her to do things that are sinful before marriage. It fascinates and draws her, this mix of torment and desire. The desolation and hurting ache when her mother finally 'hmmphs!' and ends her so-thorough application of the cream, quickly slips on and ties the clit-cozy, then leaves the room with a disapproving glance back at Cathy arching with carnal abandon on the bed. To lie there squirming futilely, knowing it will take some time for the throbbing ache in her sex to subside, for the irritating scratchy grip on her pulsing clit to overcome the urges, and cause her sex to shrink down like the embers of a fire glowing to ash. Till her pulse slows and need ceases hammering at her mind and she can sleep. Cathy knows she would get the worst spanking of her life if she ever spoke her desires, if she begged her mother to continue, to torment her more, to rub her clitoris *again* like that, to please not stop rubbing her nipples just yet, because she wants to be punished *harder*... So she never has spoken such words, only moans of anguished sexuality. The understanding between her and her mother is that this treatment is a combination of necessary hygene, a sensual punishment for her frequent carnal behaviour, and a training to strengthen her will. Cathy is not supposed to *desire* it. But she knows... and probably her mother knows, that really she does desire it. She glories in it. Her sexual arousal may be torment, yet through that torment she receives the holy gift of choice and affirmation of her faith. She may choose to remain pure, and chaste, by refraining from any attempt to masturbate herself to relief. Or she may choose to show weakness, to commit the sin of masturbation, to submit to the demands of her flesh and repudiate the Lord's will. She has come to feel that she is especially blessed by her unique development, which must be by God's design. Due to which she has been gifted with an exceptional intensity of temptation, all the better to demonstrate her love of God's word. The greater the searing strength of the desire between her legs, the more strongly she feels touched by God's love, such unique attention. There are times when she finds it... glorious - to know that God had singled her out for such powerful intensity of sensation, such a challenge to virtuousness, and to know that she is equal to the trial. That no matter how powerfully her body fills her mind with carnal wishes, she will never, ever touch herself there contrary to her Lord's wish. Even though her body often cries demands for such touches with all the persuassion, guile and persistence of the Devil himself, she is secure in her adherence to God's command of purity, and the aid of Jesus' love in resisting temptation. Now and then, when the power within her body has been fanned to extremes by her mother's ministrations, and her mind feels as if it will explode or lose consciousness from the intensity, she has experienced a kind of breakthrough into a realm of calm euphoric detachment. She is aware still of her body's anguished, desperate desire for an unknown completion, yet feels herself filled with a serene sense of universal love. Her mind detaches from her tormented, struggling body, and is drawn into the aura of Divine peace. So on the whole she is satisfied with her lot. This torment of pleasure and frustration and struggle with sin is *hers*, her life, and she is not only content with the flame that burns in her body, but derives from it a sense of exhaltation and personal communion with God.