Andrew Roller Presents
C O M I C U P D A T E
FREE! Internet Edition May 18, 1995
THE COMIC UPDATE ARCHIVES
by Andrew Roller
From: COMIC UPDATE #3, August 25, 1986
Guidelines for Researchers: I have dispensed with the Ògrading system.Ó
Where the current address of the artist is known, I have published it.
Slam Bang #5, $1.25. Digest. Hutchinson Bros. and Allen Freeman.
Headline: SON OF MAD
Story Preview: Anthology of wry, humorous stories. The last days
of the dinosaurs are detailed in ÒA Dinosaur Legend!Ó A monkey grinderÕs
chimp gets thrown in jail in ÒThe Monkey Business.Ó A hippy coma patient
wakes up and moves in with a medical intern in ÒItÕs A Groovy World.Ó A
cannibal orphan gets adopted in ÒCarnivorous Habits.Ó
Story Critique: ÒDinosaur LegendÓ simulates Pierre BoulleÕs novel,
ÒPlanet of the Apes.Ó ÒMonkey BusinessÓ is hilarious but dies with an old
joke at the end. ÒGroovy WorldÓ and ÒCarnivorous HabitsÓ are flawless.
Art: Mainstream MAD magazine art in all the stories except
ÒDinosaur Legend,Ó which is not stamp art but looks like it.
Special Features: Wraparound mailer sports a flawless eight panel
story about life as a wraparound mailer plus [many other special features.
Ed.]
Subjective Opinion: Excellent buy. Best small press magazine I have
ever read.
1995 Commentary: One of the great mysteries of the small press (to
me, anyway) is, ÒWhat ever happened to the Hutchinson Brothers and Allen
Freeman?Ó They seemed to have an excellent, highly acclaimed ÒcompanyÓ
going when I joined the small press. Yet, by about 1987, they were utterly
and completely gone from the small press scene. Other than Matt Feazell,
they were probably the most professional artists in the genre.
Captain Optimist #1, $1.25. Digest. T.M. Maple and Allen Freeman, Fan-
Atic Press.
Headline: CAPTAIN OPTIMIST, 150 Copies Printed
Story Preview: Can Captain Optimist save the world from nuclear
destruction when President Reagan has a down day and decides to Òpush
the button?Ó
Story Critique: Story is loaded with hype in a satire of the John
Byrne style. Be prepared for a lot of wordy reading!
Special Features: Editorial explains how Captain Optimist was
created (as an antidote to CYNICALMAN), mentions and gives addresses for
Matt Feazell, The CollectorsÕ Club. Beautiful one page Captain Optimist
pin-up. Back cover ad for Captain Optimist No. 2 and Captain Optimist
dayglow button.
Subjective Opinion: Unique character. Excellent buy.
1995 Commentary: As I sit here now looking at Captain Optimist
once again, it occurs to me that this is probably THE character that all
comics collectors are consciously (or unconsciously) looking for.
First of all, let me define Òcomics collectors.Ó What I DONÕT mean
by that are the average boys who pass on through, reading all kinds of
comics, perhaps even morbid or insane science fiction comics. Nor do I
mean those who are into creating their own strange or bizarre comics
today.
What I mean by Òcomics collectorsÓ is the hard core dudes. The ones
who have every issue of X-MEN and who stay up late watching Dr. Who on
Saturday nights. You know, guys with beards, small brains and big bellies.
Now these sort of fellows would be perfectly delighted with Captain
Optimist. This hero wears rose colored glasses--all the time. He flies
around looking for all thatÕs good in the world. Except for jibes against
conservative Republicans, youÕll never find anything in this comic of a
satirical or ironic nature. No, there is no hypocrisy in America in Captain
Optimist. If we would all just fly around in our underpants looking for the
good in everyone, everything would be fine! Captain Optimist is sort of a
retreat from reality. It works as long as you never leave...your closet. The
minute you walk out, of course, youÕre confronted with the reality of the
world, which (even in America) is much more temperamentally like Bosnia
than like Ossie and Harriet. But there is a hard-core gang of comics
collectors who yearn for the world to be like Captain Optimist, and it is
my opinion that somebody could make some nice pocket change for himself
peddling this kind of character in 1995.
As for the creators of Captain Optimist, I have no idea what
happened to them. Like the Hutchinson Brothers, they disappeared around
1987, never to be seen again. Perhaps they are with Elvis in a flying
saucer somewhere, exploring the good side of Jupiter.
The Funny Files #1, $1.39. 8 1/2Ó x 11Ó. By Andrew Eng and Bob Supina.
Headline: STEPSON OF MAD
Story Preview: Anthology of wry, humorous stories and vignettes.
ÒArtieÓ gets into trouble when he draws details of PicassoÕs paintings on
his employerÕs ice cream cakes. ÒSpring breakÓ collegiates are
enlightened in Florida. ÒSubway Survival Tips.Ó ÒMall DoctorÓ treats acne
on Valley Girl cruisers. ÒSecret Agent A-10Ó risks losing her clothing
when she embarks on a dangerous mission. ÒHonko, Clown For Hire,Ó
attempts to cheer a child. RAMBO takeoff featuring ÒJersey ShoreÓ eatery
class.
Stroy Critique: ÒArtieÓ is flawless. ÒSpring BreakÓ is flawless but
boring. ÒSubway SurvivalÓ is flawless. ÒMall DoctorÓ is flawless.
ÒSecret Agent A-10Ó is flawless but boring. It features traditional
stereotyped portrayals of women and homosexuals. ÒHonkoÓ is flawless.
ÒJersey ShoreÓ is slightly flawed but excellent fun.
Art: Excellent. Some stories, like ÒSecret Agent A-10,Ó are perfect,
others are quite good. ÒSecret Agent A-10Ó is a real doll, a must buy for
collectors of blonde, blue-eyed good girl art.
Lettering: Excellent. Some is even like Walt KellyÕs George Ward.
Special Features: One-panel gag on back cover, a satire of the lyrics
to John Cougar MellencampÕs ÒJack and DianeÓ pop song.
1995 Commentary: Another collection of outstanding artists and
writers who have disappeared into the void.
EDITORIAL, On MINI-COMIC UPDATE (pg. 4): Hi! Believe it or not, six
months ago I had no idea mini-comics existed. I was struggling to sell my
comics, and took out a (very expensive) half page ad in THE COMICS
BUYERSÕ GUIDE.
Guess who saw my ad and mailed me a free comic? Of course! Matt
Feazell! Guess what I did? I read it and then threw it away! (IÕve since
bought another copy.)
Matt wrote Ònetwork accessÓ beside Tim Corrigan and Clay GeerdesÕ
addresses (publishers of the fanzines, SMALL PRESS COMICS EXPLOSION
(SPCE), and COMIX WAVE (CW), respectively) and I subscribed to both at
once.
I was disappointed by the clutter and diminutive space allocations in
SPCE, and later got kicked out. CW, on the other hand, despite ClayÕs
excellent editorials, provided little more than one line plugs for minis.
On July 1 Tim announced in SPCE No. 6 that SPCE was dropping to a
quarterly schedule. I had planned to devote my whole summer to expanding
my comic company; but now, with SPCE going into hibernation, it looked
like I would have to close down too.
Shortly thereafter a very rude letter from Tim appeared in my
mailbox, and I was curtly informed that, due to my (innocent) attempt to
advertise THE GAY ADVENTURER in SPCE No. seven I, and the ÒcrapÓ and
ÒhorseshitÓ that I published, was ÒoutÓ of SPCE.
I at once dropped everything and began working on MINI-COMIC
UPDATE, reviewing minis I had bought second-hand from Matt.
And here we are! IÕm still hesitant about reviewing other peopleÕs
hard work, and some have criticized me for being too harsh. IÕve made
some mistakes, too, like my ratings on SNOWBUNIÕs story and art in MINI-
COMIC UPDATE No. 2 (too low). But MINI-COMIC UPDATE is loads of fun (at
least for me!) and I hope to keep it up for years to come (unless I get
elected president in Ô88!) Modestly yours, Andrew Roller
1995 Commentary: Some of you may remember Tim CorriganÕs SPCE,
which was briefly sold by real comic book distributors and stocked in real
comic book stores. There was a black and white independent comic book
explosion going on at the time, fueled largely by the popularity of the
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. (At that time a brand new comic book on
the Òcutting edge,Ó not some tired over-commercialized crap for 5-year-
old boys.) The B/W explosion, like TimÕs reviewzine of the same name,
was totally over by early 1987. Tim and the other B/W comics makers
slowly (or quickly) went bankrupt and faded away. However, Tim
CorriganÕs work is still talked about to this day and seen as a Òturning
pointÓ in the small press, a kind of lodestone by which small press history
can be marked out.
Oh, yeah. Not enough people wrote in my name for president in 1988
so instead we got that stellar leader...George Bush!
A final note: for the first three issues MINI-COMIC UPDATE was the
name of what I published, but people kept sending me digest-sized comics
and whatnot so with issue number four I changed the name to COMIC
UPDATE.
Floyd Flamdoozle (Unnumbered), 25¢ + stamp. Mini. By Allen Freeman and
Chuck Bunker.
Story Preview: Floyd Flamdoozle, mini-comic character, refuses to
work for Fan-Atic press.
Story Critique: Choppy but excellent. I have, however, seen this
Òcharacter comes to lifeÓ sort of thing many times.
Subjective Opinion: Good buy. Excellent buy for any who wish to see
the Dark Horse, High School, APC, Psuedo [sic] and Fan-Atic small press
publishers caricatured.
1995 Commentary: It is funny listing those names of publishers,
because many of them had disappeared from the small press by the time I
wrote that review, and that was a review of a ÒnewÓ comic at the time.
ÒHigh School,Ó ÒAPC,Ó ÒDark Horse,Ó all were ending their careers in small
press by the time I got into it. ÒHigh SchoolÓ and ÒAPCÓ were part of the
New Wave era of small press, which ended with the beginning of Tim
CorriganÕs SPCE.
Ratman, The Dark Snipe #1, 25¢. Mini. Randy Crawford.
Headline: DARK TRIPE
Story Preview: The death of Spruce PayneÕs parents spurs him to
combat trivial crimes.
Story Critique: Good. Weightlifting sequence lacks spontaneity.
Payne resolves to fight traffic violators when his parents get run over by
a truck, yet as Ratman, he nearly runs over people himself! Other scenes
are too heavy handed: it is not enough for publisher Randy Crawford that
Ratman beat up a man for littering: Crawford swathes the character in
bandages and places him in a wheelchair (BEFORE his encounter with
Ratman).
Story Complete? No. The police have spotted Ratman and are about
to pursue when the comic ends.
Art: Excellent.
Subjective Opinion: Excellent buy. Why do talented writers/artists
insist on mucking about with another companiesÕ copyrighted characters?
Frank MillerÕs DARK KNIGHT is itself a sort of parody of BATMAN, parodies
of parodies appear almost pointless.
1995 Commentary: DonÕt confuse this Randy Crawford, now long
gone from the small press, with Randy H. Crawford, a popular member of
the small press today who makes adult comics.
C O M I C U P D A T E S T O R I E S
The Fading Universe
Part Seven
by Andrew Roller
Chapter Three
The department store shuddered as artillery bombarded the mall.
Marvin and Elsa exchanged anxious glances, their hands slipping into
each other's palms.
"We're under attack," the Lieutenant, suddenly appearing, shouted
to the prisoners. "I suggest you take cover!"
"Must be the city cops," Marvin said to Elsa as he pulled her
underneath a table.
"Just so it's not the Leathernecks," she breathed.
"Or the mutants," Marvin added. Or one of a hundred other groups
inside the sprawling city that would find quick work for any cache of
arms that they happened upon.
Suddenly the ceiling above them collapsed in a shower of cement
boulders and broken plaster.
"You O.K.?" Marvin asked Elsa as a snow of alabaster dust drifted
down upon them.
"Yeah." She coughed.
Marvin crawled out from underneath the table.
"All I asked for was a refund," Perry quipped when he saw him.
Marvin spotted Flaherty's feet sticking out from underneath a
rack of women's dresses.
"Marvin? Are you still there, Marvin?" the fat boy's voice
quavered.
Harrigan appeared, dressed in a see-through nightie, with a
flowered corselet around his thigh.
"Pull your pants on," Marvin told Harrigan. "And get Frankie."
C O M I C U P D A T E N E W S
CORRIGAN REVEALED!
Openly Queer, He Leads Update Into its Tenth Year
Interviewer (I): You have been quietly putting out Comic Update
for several years now, yet nobody knows who you are. You review
others, yet yourself go unreviewed. Isn't it time the public got to know
you?
Corrigan (C): Well, I'm a very private person.
I: Still, a few words wouldn't hurt, would they?
C: (after stalling) Okay. When I was 32 I was in a terrible
marriage. I was unwilling to admit to myself that I was gay. Finally
one night I packed up my secret collection of BlueBoy and Mandate,
picked up my cat, and climbed out the bedroom window. I've never
looked back. The wife got everything else, and she can keep it. I
believe she's now happily married to a prosecutor or something, in
Florida. Fortunately there were no children from the marriage.
I: How about your relationship with Roller? Is he a pervert, your
ex-gay lover...
C: (interrupting) He masturbates. That is the main problem. He
even unplugs his phone so nobody can interrupt his masturbating. Once
he told me he was trying to get into the Guiness Book of World
Records.
I: How about Dockery? What is your relationship with him?
C: I pick up his mail for him. I hand over his bills and shit, and
keep the small press stuff. Then I take it over to [P.D.] Wilson's and
review it and type it all up. Then this alcoholic jailbird wife-beaten
(note I didn't say "beater", but "beaten") Jones guy runs off the Update
at a local copy shop. I think he gets someone there to do it when the
management isn't looking, but I don't ask. It goes from me to Jones to
the copy shop, then Jones shows up with a stack of the shit and I have
to begin the thankless task of folding, cutting, and stapling. It takes
me hours, and yet people say "I won't deal with Update because it's put
out by that Andrew Roller guy." Thanks, folks. My numb, stapler-bitten
hands are a testament to how false that statement is.
I: How did you get in with Roller, anyway?
C: Through Liam Brooks. He led Lydia astray, and me too. He
came up with this Fugitive Factsheet idea. Roller got credit as co-
founder, I wrote reviews, and Liam ran them off at a copy shop in
Texas. I could never get him to mail me enough copies to distribute in
Atlanta, though, and eventually he killed the magazine. That left, you
guessed it, me and Roller. So naturally Roller was looking for someone
to do his Update, and I still had a shitload of unpublished reviews.
Then I made the Jones connection, got a key to Dockery's mailbox, and
the rest is history. I even have the good fortune of being related (by
name, anyway) to the esteemed Tim Corrigan of SPCE fame.
I: You have been distributing Comic Update for years now in
Columbus and, especially, Atlanta.
C: Since at least 1991. It started with Fugitive Factsheet, of
course. I've also run for political office in Atlanta, and Update printed
some of my campaign ads. I ran as the openly gay candidate, of course.
I: Are you HIV-positive?
C: That's an offensive question.
I: It's offensive to be HIV-positive?
C: No, the way you put it. Coming right after I said I'd proudly run
as a gay candidate.
I: Sorry. We'll skip it, then. Tell me where you distribute your
books, I mean, Comic Update.
C: Comic Update, our newly renamed poetry title Dreamgirls
with Shaman, and, occasionally, that heterosexual filth that Roller
foists on me, Naughty Naked Dreamgirls (NND). NND does not get
distributed with Update and Shaman, however, I assure you of that. I
dump NND off at the Museum of Acting and Cinematic Arts in
Columbus, where you will never find Orson Welles but you will always
find the latest Savannah.
I: Which is located where in Columbus, not that I care?
C: MACA, as it is called, is on Victory Drive in Columbus.
I: How do you spell Victory?
C: Not that you care, of course...
I: Well, tell me where you distribute Update and Shaman, then,
the "Atlanta Distribution Points", as it were.
C: Oxford II on Peachtree Road, Fantasyland, Oxford on Pharr
Road, Criminal Records in Little Five Points, Book Nook on Buford
Highway, Oxford Comics, Wax N' Fax, Tower Books in Atlanta, Blue Moon
Records, and Wuxtry's Records in Atlanta. This Wuxtry's it is
interesting. There is an Athens, Georgia branch of Wuxtry's where an
REM band member once worked. REM got their start there (as a musical
group), also the B-52's, and many other great punk bands.
I: So all of these stores have Update and Shaman available all
the time?
C: I stock them basically in the order they are listed. If I run out
of copies, I run out of copies. Jones frequently does not run as many
copies as I could distribute. He is sort of a lazy bum. Also,
Fantasyland closes early, so I skip it if it's already closed. But I
diligently stock all these places, in the order listed, on a regular basis.
Some places Update and Shaman are free, other places charge money.
But the books go right out the door. Somebody is picking them up, one
by one, and reading them. I've even followed a person out, watched him
read Update and throw it in the trash, and gone over and fished the
issue out of the trash can and re-stocked it. I call it recycling (laughs).
I: Did you ever distribute Roller's notorious book, Chester?
C: Good God! Don't even mention that one! I dumped the whole lot
of them in a bin at a Columbus comix store. When I went back the next
day, the manager (or someone) had thrown them out. Good riddance!
I: What is Lynn Hansen's relationship with Update?
C: I don't know. He moved back to Santa Fe, New Mexico, and took
up again with all his gay pals there. Don't send anything to that Boise,
Idaho address listed on the Update business cards. He's not there any
more. Basically he is out of the picture. I am now Update's
representative to the gay community.
I: Well, I can't think of anything much else to say. I'm new at
this.
C: You're good at asking annoying questions. You'll go far. Maybe
Roller will hire you and you can go interview Ian Shires or somebody.
(tape ends)
R E A D E R E - M A I L
ÒThe comics people want you to buy good paper comics so they can charge
over 2 bucks a copy whether you care about good paper or not,Ó writes
findline@ix.netcom.com (Ben Ohmart).
N O T I C E : There was no May 17th Comic Update. (I had to go to the
bathroom.)
ROLLER PUBLICATIONS Free for a greeting-card SASE (or $1.00) from:
Jim Corrigan, P.O. Box 3663, Phenix City, AL 36868. COMIC UPDATE
(Library of Congress ISSN: 0894-5195): small press comix. NAUGHTY
NAKED DREAMGIRLS (Library of Congress ISSN: 1070-1427): sex stories.
(Include an age statement-18 or over.) DREAMGIRLS WITH SHAMAN:
poetry. END OF TRANSMISSION
Subj: Comic Update May 18, 1995 Allen Freeman, Corrigan Revealed!