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ÒThere is a wall of money ready to hit any business that stands even
a slim chance of becoming a blue-chip Internet brand.Ó
- The Economist, July 25, 1998, pg. 62.
As you know, brand names are very important. ThereÕs Sears, K-
Mart, and even aol.com. For a brand name to be successful, it must be a
name that everyone has at the tip of their tongue.
IÕm no slacker in this department. As you can see, my brand name is
a word everyone knows: fuck. Heck, you probably hear fuck every day.
The other half of my brand name is a word you hear a lot too:
decency. Put the two together and what do you have, if not a billion dollar
brand name?
Investors of the world, donÕt be left out. I can see it now: ÒI
thought that damn zine was just SPAM. Now its stock sells for $200.00!Ó
Of course, the wise investor will want to read a prospectus. HeÕll
want to see the Fuck Decency stock offering laid out in legal language, and
written about in an approving way by accountants.
But, gentlemen, do you know how much lawyers and accountants
cost? Figure it this way: a porno magazine costs $5.99. Thousands of
dollars that could be put to a useful purpose, buying porn for me to review
in Fuck Decency, would have to be wasted (on lawyers, no less!) in order
for you to read some fancy prospectus.
So, letÕs not waste any money, okay?
HereÕs how IÕll spend your money:
First of all, IÕm going to need a continuing supply of porn. As you
know, porno reviews are a staple of Fuck Decency, so IÕll need to have
plenty of money to go to Tower Books every day and get all the latest
magazines. American magazines, like Playboy and Penthouse. British
magazines, like Mayfair. French magazines, like Club and the French
Penthouse. Heck, Tower even sells porno magazines from Mexico,
Australia, and Japan! ThatÕs a lot of dollars, as you can see, but IÕm
willing to work hard at spending them to insure a proper return for you.
Next, there are video tapes. I will need to go to the SunCoast video
store on a regular basis to keep up with all the new Playboy tapes. IÕll
need to go to Virgin Megastore to get all the Penthouse tapes. Plus, as you
know, there are thousands of other tapes, by lesser known brands. IÕll
probably need to buy several VCRÕs and run them day and night to keep Fuck
Decency up to date on all the latest pornographic offerings.
Now, with all those magazines and tapes, IÕm going to need
someplace to put them. This had me stumped for awhile. Where could I
find a really big house to put all that porn? I thought and thought. Then it
hit me; of course! Beverly Hills. When I found out that Larry Flint already
lives in Beverly Hills, that clinched it for me. If weÕre going to make lots
of money, we need to think like the big, successful entrepreneurs do.
Fuck Decency has been published for three years and still has no
pictures of naked girls. This is a deficiency that must be remedied at
once. So, when I have purchased a mansion in Beverly Hills, I am going to
have to throw a big party to let all the girls know IÕm in town and ready to
photograph them. Young girls are popular right now, so I will have to
invite girls who are soon going to turn 18. This means I will have to go
around to all the high schools and pass out invitations to all the girls. I
wonÕt want to look like some pervert so IÕll need a big limo to take me
around. We may as well buy the limo instead of just renting it, since the
girls will probably want to go to the beach or something, and what better
way to keep them happy than by taking them in a limo?
As you know, Playboy has been around for over 40 years. So thereÕs
no sense in just passing out invitations to pose for Fuck Decency to girls
in high school. It will be a big job, but I may as well visit the junior high
schools and elementary schools too. IÕll invite them all to my party, so
they can all know that Fuck Decency is ready and waiting to photograph
them!
(IÕd go to the nursery schools too, but since the girls there canÕt read
the invitations, it seems like it would be rather pointless.)
Of course you canÕt have a party for little girls, even in a big
mansion, without having a swimming pool. There will probably already be
a pool in the backyard of any mansion I buy in Beverly Hills, but this
question arises: with so many little girls running around my house, will
they all be able to fit in my pool? I guess I could put some girls in the
bath tub in my house, but why not build an indoor pool too? I figure with
an outdoor pool, an indoor pool, a jacuzzi, AND a bath tub, there should be
just enough water for all the girls to get wet.
Oh, yes. No pool or bath tub is complete without a rubber ducky or
inflatable raft, so I will need to buy a lot of those too, so each little girl
can have one of her very own.
I guess I should detail all the various types of food that will be
needed at my party. But that would take up the rest of this issue. Just
ask your daughter what she likes to eat, write it all down, figure out what
it costs to buy all that stuff, and then multiply it by 3,000. (DonÕt forget:
what goes in comes back out, so include toilet paper on the list.)
After the party is over, I will of course need to get down to work.
IÕm sure youÕre wondering about transportation in and around Beverly
Hills, and I am too. How is the busy publisher of a successful Internet
zine supposed to get things done when L.A.Õs freeways are jammed with
cars?
The solution, of course, is to travel by helicopter. Sure, the limo
might be nice for taking the Fuck Decency girls to the beach, but when
time is of the essence, only a helicopter will do! So part of your
investment will have to be put to this purpose.
Which raises another question: If weÕre going to build a helipad, why
not just pour a little more asphalt and build a runway? By knocking down
a few adjacent homes, we could even make it an International runway.
Then if somebody like the President wanted to visit he could fly right in
and park Air Force One right in my backyard. (You gotta figure, with 3,000
underage girls all partying at my mansion, Bill might want to cum!)
With a Presidential Visit, we are guaranteed International news
coverage. The Fuck Decency party will be on ABC, CBS, NBC, CNN, CNBC.
You get the picture: By thinking big, we maximize our returns!
Yes, now is the time to invest in the Next Big Thing: Fuck Decency!
Never mind ÒportalsÓ, Òcontent aggregatorsÓ, or ÒgatewaysÓ. Take this
little test: find a 15-year-old boy and ask him,
ÒSon, would you rather spend your money on portals, content
aggregators, gateways, or naked girls?Ó
DONÕT invest a penny unless he answers with the latter!
Andrew Roller Presents
FUCK DECENCY
free plug:
NAKED girls and more at:
http://www.AlessandraSmile.com
donÕt miss investing here either!
Issue No. 395
Naughty Naked Dreamgirls in
PassionÕs Playpen
Chapter Six
Marie extended a curled finger and touched NancyÕs slitted nest.
Nancy jerked but did not complain. She kept her hips offered. She gritted
her teeth a little as Marie began to stroke her fleece.
ÒYes, Nancy, IÕm going to excite you a little first... ah, is that your
spot? Have I found it?Ó Marie asked. Nancy seized up like a child
receiving an injection. She lifted her eyes to the ceiling. ÒAnd then,
Nancy dear, when youÕre in a nice heat, IÕm going to flip you over my knee
and paddle your cute little ass.Ó
ÒOh, NO pleazzze,Ó Nancy begged, her eyes still fixed on the ceiling.
ÒYes, and with this crop if you prove uncooperative,Ó Marie said.
ÒNobody gets out of my game room with an uninjured bottom, my dear.
Erotically injured, of course. Something to make you remember me by
when you sit down tomorrow, and the next day too. I consider it a gift.
From me to you,Ó Marie said to Nancy. She invaded the girlÕs slit but Nancy
remained standing. She clapped her hands to her bottom and begged that it
be spared. Yet she stood complaint, pushing her hips out to Marie. NancyÕs
small hands rubbed the white cheeks of her ass and she remained with her
eyes fixed on the roof.
Kate marvelled at Marie. The woman was completely self-
possessed. She amused herself in NancyÕs slit as unabashedly as if the
girl were a visiting niece, and she simply straightening her dress for her.
Marie looked at Beth. ÒTell Sherry to come in and clean for us,Ó Marie said
to Beth even as she kept a finger within NancyÕs private.
ÒYes,m,Ó Beth answered. Beth went to the door of the game room and
unbarred it. It was locked but she knew the combination. She drew back
the hasp from the bar and lifted the bar. It was wooden, heavy. Beth had
to strain to get it up, although Marie, with her catlike strength, had shown
little difficulty putting the bar in place. Kate wondered if she herself
were Batgirl and Marie the Catwoman. Val Kilmer was the only one
missing. Jim might be Val, Kate thought to herself. Young, excitable, yet
a bit brooding also, she saw, now that his strength had left him. David,
her choice for the next round, was steadily swelling. Silently Kate vowed
to herself that sheÕd kill Rod if she had to to keep the old man from having
the boy up his arse.
An apparition entered. As suddenly as a ghost might have appeared,
a blonde, 13-year-old nymph entered into the room. Immediately she stole
the menÕs attention completely away. Her hair was long but pinned neatly
up in a loose bun at the back of her head. Her face was Elven, a fairy from
Limerick come to taunt the men. She had eyes with long lashes, blue eyes,
blue as the sky on an Irish summer day. Her lips were beestung, like a
modelÕs, poutier even than CindyÕs. She had small cheeks and a thin neck
and fragile, bone-white shoulders. Around them was cast a soft
shimmering robe. It was completely transparent, showing her slim, frail
body inside. Yet the robe, bewitchingly, became opaque where more than
one layer of fabric collected. Between the girlÕs thighs the fabric fell,
and in layering itself upon itself it managed to obscure the view of her
delta. Her bosoms could be plainly seen, high and firm and round. And her
dimpled navel also. But just where the menÕs eyes hoped to see most, they
saw nothing. Just the softly layered fabric of the nymphÕs flowing robe
where it spilled between her legs.
The girlÕs thighs were bare. Her robe had been cleverly slitted up
both her legs so that her legs, in walking, protruded from the slits,
forcing the long robe to layer itself between her bared thighs. She was
naked in her robe, wearing nothing but gold open-toed slippers upon her
small feet. Her hands were small, bare, and her arms were bare up to her
shoulders where the robe, quite uselessly, covered but did not obscure
them.
In her fingers, quite tentatively, Kate thought, the blonde nymph held
a sponge. Kate saw at once it was for scrubbing the floor and the
furniture, for Beth fetched a pail, perhaps one filled outside the door by
the girl, and struggled inside with it. Beth was careful not to spill any of
the pailÕs water upon the floor. Kate saw suds floating in the pail. Their
tops billowed above its rim.
ÒMen, ladies, this is my neighbor Sherry,Ó Marie said casually. Still
she diddled in NancyÕs slit, though Nancy herself now had lowered her face
to gaze at the girl with the sponge. ÒSheÕs a virgin,Ó Marie said. ÒAnd
sheÕll be staying that way tonight, gentlemen, IÕm afraid. But you may
certainly watch her as she scrubs the dungeon for us. Any excitement she
brings you, though, will have to be spent in one of us ladies, not in her.Ó
ÒW-Why?Ó Mike, the sullen one, asked, rising up from the floor and
propping himself up with his hands behind his bare rump as he remained
sitting.
ÒBecause, dear boy, I insist,Ó Marie answered. She seemed delighted
to have provoked the men in a way they could not assuage. Their pricks,
depleted still, were unable to salute the girl as they wished. But they
made sure their legs were apart and they showed her their condition,
however feeble it was, in hopes of inspiring her. Sherry, though, kept her
eyes fixed straight ahead. She looked at no one, seemingly contemplating
some fixed point inside herself. Deliberately she gulped and Kate realized
she was bashful and yet proud. Had she been seen in this way before, all
naked, showing her fresh nudity to men and women? Kate guessed she had
not. The girl was on a special journey, one that was her own private
coming out, in a game room where nude male and female combatants were
assembled, waiting to start a second round at love.
the look
by Will Dockery
Words spoken,
actions shown,
the look.
Where are you, sister?
Still a believer?
Keep the homefires burning,
I watch for errant knights.
Repay the debt in kind,
after three weeks it still blows my mind.
The images from that night,
still leave me sad and breathless.
No harm really came of it,
though nothing is the same,
except my heart,
broken like never before.
Start up a new one,
fresh, cold call,
let the words snap up against the wall.
Or down onto the table,
in this Zen bar psychic babel,
it happens, babe.
Don't know where this is going,
could I look at reality,
and understand my paranoia?
I feel fine in this strange new world.
This summer world, I feel the burn.
I might thrive on it, in my own way.
When the clouds are so rapid they bring in a storm,
I admire the slow moving liquid.
Back down onto the highway, here late at night,
not even wondering, just accepting what happens,
it happens, babe.
Events crossed up here and played out,
the timing of these different panics,
what was here or was it over there.
Mystery of the whole sequence,
I have to talk in code again,
a mystery through the dreamscape,
that must be reality.
Florida is burning,
ashes are turning,
and all I can see is fire.
The mornings grey up,
and the nights darken down,
at this stage of it all is smoke,
our kingdom has crumbled into dust.
What am I, locked into this crushed time plane?
Faded love a memory in my brain.
It happens, babe.
AND IN THE END...
A WOMANÕS POINT OF VIEW
ÒI didnÕt immediately get it but it immediately struck me as
offensive.Ó
- from the column, ÒQueenie and Alphonse,Ó in the Columbus, Georgia
newspaper ÒPlaygroundsÓ.
-------------------------- Fuck Decency! ------------------------
-Back issues (and stories): type
http://www.dejanews.com/
into your browserÕs ÒLocationÓ window. Press your ÒreturnÓ key.
Click on ÒPower SearchÓ in the middle of the screen.
Find the box labelled ÒMain ArchiveÓ.
Change ÒMain ArchiveÓ to ÒComplete ArchiveÓ.
Next, do you see a blank box labelled ÒSearch for:Ó ?
Type in: roller666@earthlink.net in the blank box on the screen
that has ÒSearch forÓ written above it.
Click on ÒfindÓ (the button to the right of the box).
-Other providers and places to INVEST:
By e-mail: file.request@backdrop.com
Via the Web: http://www.netusa.net/~eli/erotica/assm/
- INVEST in NAMBLA! Web: http://www.nambla.org
-Naughty Naked Dreamgirls (Library of Congress ISSN: 1070-1427) is
copyright 1998 and a trademark of Andrew Roller. Work by others
copyright 1998 by the respective copyright holder.
-END OF 395 EMISSION
ÒFuck you, you goddam pervert!Ó
(see? even he knows half my brand name! - h.j.)