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Andrew Roller Presents
FUCK DECENCY
Sponsored by: Crab the dog
Issue No. 321
Naughty Naked Dreamgirls in
Nudie Nursery
Chapter Four
Within the parlor Jasmine sat with two other women. They were
mid-30Õs, perhaps, young like she yet dignified. Old enough to be amused
by what happened to us, yet still in the bloom of youth, pleasing Brent
with their bodies if they chose to disrobe. At the moment they were
fashionably dressed. One wore a sweater, unbuttoned, over a pretty dress.
She had glasses but had put them aside on the coffee table. The other had
on a skirt and blouse. Long strands of pearls hung casually down over her
bosoms. They made her look casual but expensive. Jasmine wore slacks.
They were dress slacks, smooth and dark brown. She wore a beige blouse
and a tan neckerchief. I might have thought I was at some conservative
womenÕs luncheon, except I was barelegged and cuffed.
Jasmine rose as we entered. She approached me first and unbuttoned
my fur. Opening it, she saw the mess IÕd made of myself at lunch. She
gasped. The other two women gazed at me and then laughed. She opened
up Missy next. She removed our coats and called the butler to come and
hang them. She did nothing about our handcuffs.
ÒPoor dear. Even your face is messy,Ó Jasmine said to Missy. She
dipped the corner of a napkin into her tea and wiped MissyÕs mouth with it.
ÒBrent made me--Ó Missy began, but Jasmine hushed her. Her finger
pressed itself to MissyÕs lips. She was gentle, yet her next words chilled
me. ÒGo stand on that big leather chair, darling,Ó Jasmine urged Missy.
ÒBut wonÕt you--?Ó Missy began. Jasmine took her by her pinned
arms and walked her to the chair. In her confusion, Missy did not finish
her sentence. Jasmine tugged off the girlÕs pumps. Then Jasmine bent and
lifted MissyÕs thigh and made her step up onto the chair. MissyÕs feet
planted themselves in the seat. It squished down under her weight. Her
adorable bottom hung its cheeks before our eyes.
The woman with the sweater and the long pretty dress rose from her
chair. She wafted over to Missy. With a concerned look in her eyes, yet
with implacable hands, she forced MissyÕs wrists up off her bulging little
bottom cheeks. The woman, whom I later learned was named Kerri,
pressed MissyÕs hands into the small of her back. Drawing a leather cord
from her sweater, she bound MissyÕs upraised wrists to the back of her
pearl choker.
ÒDonÕt break the strands of pearls or it will be worse for you,Ó
Jasmine told Missy.
ÒBut what are you going to do to me?Ó Missy bawled. She was
shivering and her peaked, honey-tipped breasts were shaking. With her
arms yanked back and high on her spine, bound quite implacably, she
offered her bosoms to the wall. It was an obscene vista, this poor
milkmaid of a girl presenting her full young bosoms. Kerri slipped into the
space behind the chair and, having made Missy present her mammaries, she
took hold of them. Kerri kissed each of MissyÕs nipples in turn.
ÒOoooh, your buds taste like honey!Ó Kerri smiled.
ÒQuit licking my boobies!Ó Missy complained.
ÒIÕm afraid this is a lesbian luncheon, dear,Ó Jasmine said to Missy.
She patted the girlÕs bottom and smiled over MissyÕs shoulder at Kerri.
ÒIÕm going to swat this precious little ass of yours until its wigglier than
you can imagine. Then IÕm going to cup it with my hands and youÕre going
to roll it on my palms, letting me feel all the little tensions and spasms
in your tushy. I see BrentÕs already been playing with you a little, from
this trace of shit in your ass crack. Bring me a napkin, Leslie, so I can
wipe her.Ó
EXPLORATIONS IN PROGRAMMING
with java joe
I was riding the bus with my friend Perply the other day (the guy
who saves his turds in plastic bags, and sings to them). He said he really
liked looking at Alexa Brinkley in Redbook, but he couldnÕt afford to buy
the magazine. I told him he needed to become a Java programmer. ÒThen
you can afford to buy a plastic bag for each of your turds, and magazines
with Alexa in them too!Ó I told Perply. He said he didnÕt understand
anything about Java, and all the books about Java looked really
complicated.
ÒJava is a bunch of icons,Ó I told Perply. ÒWhen you have created a
Java applet, you will have at least two icons. One of the icons will be
Ôsomething.htmlÕ. The other icon will be Ôsomething.classÕ.
ÒThat sounds pretty simple,Ó Perply admitted.
ÒRemember that ÔsomethingÕ can be anything,Ó I told him. ÒFor
instance, you might have Ôturd.htmlÕ, or whatever you want.Ó
ÒOkay,Ó Perply said. ÒBut what happens? Does Ôturd.htmlÕ do
anything?Ó
ÒYes,Ó I said. ÒThe Ôturd.htmlÕ icon calls up, say, an ÔAss.classÕ icon
and forces the ÔAss.classÕ icon to do something.Ó
ÒThat reminds me of my web page,Ó Perply said. ÒI have a web page
called Ôturd.htmlÕ. It says ÔI LOVE MY TURDS!Õ across the top of my web
page. Underneath that I have a picture of one of my turds.Ó
ÒHow does your web page actually work?Ó I asked Perply.
ÒMy Ôturd.htmlÕ web page calls up a separate Ôturd.gifÕ picture that
IÕve created,Ó Perply said. ÒMy web page forces the Ôturd.gifÕ picture to
display itself in my web page, so everyone can admire it.Ó
ÒYes!Ó I said. ÒAnd where do you put your Ôturd.gifÕ?Ó
ÒI put my Ôturd.gifÕ in a separate folder,Ó Perply said. ÒIÕve found
that if my gif is in the same folder as my web page, for some reason my
web page canÕt find it.Ó
ÒSo, let me see,Ó I said to Perply. ÒWhat is your Internet address?Ó
ÒMy Internet address is: perply@fart.net,Ó Perply said. ÒAt that
address I have a folder. It is labelled: Ôpublic_htmlÕ. In that folder,
Ôpublic_htmlÕ, is where I keep my web page: Ôturd.htmlÕ. ItÕs also where I
keep a folder labelled: ÔartÕ. Inside the ÔartÕ folder is where I keep my gif:
Ôturd.gifÕ.Ó
ÒGreat!Ó I told Perply. ÒJava works the same way. HereÕs what you
need to do. Inside your Ôpublic_htmlÕ folder, create another folder. Call it:
ÔturdÕ. Or you can call the folder whatever you like,Ó I said. ÒThen, I want
you to create a class file. You can call the class file whatever you like.
But, to keep everything straight, why donÕt you just call it ÔAss.classÕ.
ÒOkay,Ó Perply said. ÒLet me write this down. First, I need to have
my Internet address. At my Internet address IÕve got to have some space
for a web page. My web space happens to be in a folder that my Internet
Service Provider has decided to call Ôpublic_htmlÕ.Ó
ÒRight!Ó I said.
ÒInside my folder, which is labelled Ôpublic_htmlÕ, IÕve got my web
page,Ó Perply said.
ÒRight,Ó I agreed.
ÒMy web page is called Ôturd.htmlÕ,Ó Perply said. ÒThatÕs the name of
the icon itself.Ó
ÒRight,Ó I said.
ÒNow, in order to do Java, I need to have a folder inside my
Ôpublic_htmlÕ folder. ItÕs beside my Ôturd.htmlÕ icon. ItÕs a folder that IÕve
decided to call Ôturd.ÕÓ
ÒRight,Ó I said.
ÒInside my folder called ÔturdÕ, IÕve got a class icon. This class icon
is labelled ÔAss.classÕ,Ó Perply said.
ÒRight!Ó I agreed. ÒLetÕs look, then, at what is inside your
Ôpublic_htmlÕ folder:Ó
turd.html turd art
(an icon) (a folder) (a folder)
ÒThatÕs a good diagram,Ó Perply said. ÒÔturd.htmlÕ is my web page.
In the folder named ÔartÕ, IÕve got an icon named Ôturd.gif.ÕÓ
ÒYes,Ó I said. ÒAnd in the folder named ÔturdÕ, youÕve got an icon
named ÔAss.classÕ.Ó
ÒI know how to write html code to make my web page call to the
ÔartÕ folder and get the picture of the turd, for displaying it in my web
page,Ó Perply said. ÒBut how do I write html code to make my web page
call to the ÔturdÕ folder?Ó
ÒHereÕs the code,Ó I told Perply. ÒIÕll write it right here:Ó
<applet codebase="turd" code="Ass.class" width=250 height=50>
</applet>
ÒPut that code in your web page,Ó I told Perply. ÒÔapplet codebase=Õ
refers to the folder where the Java applet is located.Ó
ÒThe Java applet, I take it, is the icon labelled ÔAss.classÕ?Ó Perply
asked.
ÒYes,Ó I said. ÒThat is your Java applet. ItÕs the icon labelled
ÔAss.classÕ.Ó
ÒHmmm,Ó Perply said. ÒWhatÕs this mean: code="Ass.class"
ÒThatÕs your class file, idiot!Ó I told him. ÒItÕs your Java applet.Ó
ÒOh, yeah,Ó Perply said. ÒNow I get it. ÔcodebaseÕ refers to the
*folder* where my class icon is kept. And ÔcodeÕ refers to the class icon
itself.Ó
ÒRight,Ó I said.
ÒHow do I make a class file?Ó Perply asked.
ÒLet me write out the instructions for you,Ó I told him. ÒDo you have
a Macintosh?Ó
ÒYes,Ó Perply said.
ÒOkay, hereÕs the instructions,Ó I said.
1. Call MacWarehouse: (or whomever you prefer) 1-800-255-6227.
2. Order CodeWarrior Discover Programming Edition, $79.95
3. When it arrives, double-click on the ÒJava CodeWarrior IDEÓ icon.
ÒIÕm using an earlier version, so things might be a little different
for you,Ó I told Perply.
4. Double-click on ÒSimpleTextÓ, the writing program that came with
your Macintosh.
ÒYouÕll need to use a bare bones writing program, so only your
typewritten code is included in it,Ó I told Perply.
5. Type the html code, written above, into your SimpleText writing
program. Save the file. Name it Òrough htmlÓ.
6. Type the Java code, written below, into your SimpleText writing
program. Save the file. Name it Òrough JavaÓ.
/* -----------------------------------------
This displays "LoveTurds" when it repaints.
Java's classes: Applet (applet)
Graphics (awt) used for drawing
Custom classes: Ass
---------------------------*/
public class Ass extends java.applet.Applet {
public void paint(java.awt.Graphics g) {
g.drawString("LoveTurds", 100 , 25);
}
}
7. In the Java CodeWarrior IDE, pull down the menu under File. Release it
on ÒNew ProjectÓ.
8. Name your project. (In this example, IÕll name it: turdie).
9. In the project window which has appeared, youÕll see Òreplace meÓ
listed twice. Double-click on the first Òreplace meÓ.
10. Replace the existing text, in the new window which appears, with
your html code (that you typed into SimpleText). Using ÒSave As,Ó save
the file as: turd.html
11. Close the turd.html window.
12. Double-click on the second Òreplace meÓ (in the ÔturdieÕ project
window).
13. Replace the existing text, in the new window which appears, with
your Java code (that you typed into SimpleText). Using ÒSave as,Ó save the
file as: turd.java
14. Close the turd.java window.
15. In the Java CodeWarrior IDE, pull down the menu under Project.
Release it on ÒMakeÓ.
16. Java CodeWarrior will now make your Ass.class file.
ÒSo now IÕve got a turd.html file,Ó Perply said. ÒBut what do I do
with my old web page?Ó Perply asked.
ÒTake it down for now, so I can show you how to display a web page
containing Java,Ó I told him.
ÒOkay,Ó Perply said. ÒBut how do I upload my brand new turd.html
file?Ó
ÒUse Netscape Navigator,Ó I told him. ÒLetÕs continue with our
instructions:Ó
17. Use ÒFetchÓ to ftp to your web space.
18. In Fetch, go along the menu bar to ÒRemoteÓ. Pull down the menu and
use ÒDelete Directory or FileÓ to delete your old web page.
19. In Fetch, go along the menu bar to ÒDirectoriesÓ. Pull down the menu
and use ÒCreate New DirectoryÓ to create a folder named ÒturdÓ.
20. Quit Fetch.
21. Use Netscape to *ftp* to your web space. ( ftp:// (etc.)
22. In Netscape, pull down the menu under File. Release it on ÒUpload
FileÓ. Upload your new Ôturd.htmlÕ file. Then open your ÔturdÕ folder and
upload your ÔAss.classÕ file into your ÔturdÕ folder.
23. Go to some other address with Netscape. (Go look at someone elseÕs
web page, like ÒExcite,Ó ÒHotmail,Ó or whatever).
24. Now, itÕs time to go look at your web page. Use http:// (etc.) to go to
your web page.
25. Click on your icon labelled Ôturd.htmlÕ. The Ôturd.htmlÕ icon will call
to the ÔAss.classÕ icon, inside the ÔturdÕ folder. It will make an applet run
on your web page! (The words ÒLoveTurdsÓ will appear on your web page.)
ÒThatÕs it?Ó Perply asked.
ÒThatÕs it,Ó I said. ÒIf you had created a bigger Java applet, you
would have more than one class file in your ÔturdÕ folder. YouÕd have lots
of class files there. Like I said, a Java applet is nothing but a bunch of
icons. One html icon, which is your web page. Plus as many class icons as
are needed for that Java applet to run.
(something).html PLUS (something).class (something).class
an icon an icon an icon
(As many or as few class icons as are needed).
ÒWell, thanks,Ó Perply said. ÒBut it still seems pretty complicated.
IÕve got to sing to my turds now, so you should talk about Java with
somebody else.Ó
ÒOkay,Ó I said.
AND IN THE END...
MERRY CHRISTMAS, AMERICA!
ÒEarlier this month a Chicago law firm urged its clients to
consider cancelling their Christmas parties on the grounds that it could
expose them to all sorts of liability suits - from sexual harassment to
drunken driving.Ó
- The Economist, December 13, 1997, pg. 51.
(Ah, yes, America in the 90Õs. Now even Christmas is ÔinappropriateÕ. -
h.j.)
-------------------------- Fuck Decency! ------------------------
-Back issues (and stories): type
http://www.dejanews.com/
into your browserÕs ÒLocationÓ window. Press your ÒreturnÓ key.
Click on ÒQuick SearchÓ, then type in: roller39@idt.net
Press your ÒreturnÓ key.
Scroll to the very bottom of the page that appears.
Change ÒStandardÓ to ÒCompleteÓ
roller39@idt.net is already typed into the window.
Click in the window behind the ÒtÓ in Ò.netÓ
Press your ÒreturnÓ key.
-Other providers:
Usenet Newsgroup: alt.sex.stories.moderated
or by e-mail: file.request@backdrop.com
or via the Web: http://www.netusa.net/~eli/erotica/assm/
-Free minicomics: send a stamped, self-addressed envelope to: Jim
Corrigan, P.O. Box 3663, Phenix City, AL 36868
- JOIN the worldÕs greatest organization! Send $35.00 to The North
American Man/Boy Love Association for a one-year membership.
NAMBLA, P.O. Box 174, Midtown Station, New York, NY 10018.
-Naughty Naked Dreamgirls (Library of Congress ISSN: 1070-1427) is
copyright 1997 and a trademark of Andrew Roller. Work by others
copyright 1997 by the respective copyright holder.
-END OF 321 EMISSION
- ÒSomething is very wrong here.Ó (Miss Manners on office Christmas
parties in the 90Õs, where the employees, not the company, are required
to pay.) (December 21, 1997.)