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Coming Soon from Anne Rice
TROMBONE
A man and a woman fly around in time, fighting over a trombone. Is it
his? Is it hers? Or does it belong to the Ringling Bros.? (Buy it or
sheÕll write more porn.)
Hardcover: $42 Paperback: $25
Plus ÒA Trombone for Anne Rice,Ó a new CD, only $29.97 (plus tax).
ÒIÕve always wanted to blow on a (trom)bone since I was a girl.Ó
- Anne Rice
Andrew Roller Presents
FUCK DECENCY
Issue No. 303
Naughty Naked Dreamgirls in
Pussy Playland
Chapter Four
Sherry tickled the underside of JeffÕs cock. ÒIs it too tight, honey?Ó
she asked. Her voice had a tone of mock sympathy in it. Yet I knew she did
not really want to hurt her husband. At least, I hoped she didnÕt. How
awful it must have been for Jeff! He had a huge banana of a cock, but now
almost all of it was on the far side of the pillory, choked at the base by
the clamping wood, the rest left to quiver untended, a hot dog in need of a
bun.
ÒItÕs... ItÕs tight but...Ó Jeff was awed by the fix his wife had put him
in.
ÒIÕll bet I could play with you all day and youÕd never cum now,Ó
Sherry said playfully. She tickled JeffÕs penis and he groaned and threw
back his head. His buttcheeks, so slim and well-formed, seemed to
contract right into his body.
ÒI-I think youÕd still see something shoot out if I came,Ó Jeff said in
a haggard voice. How delightful it must be to have a husband and just play
together, experimenting, I thought to myself. Sherry bent low, mooning
me with her bottom, and gave her husbandÕs prick a long, mouthing kiss
where his purplish head jumped at the air. When she arose I saw that yet
more of her lipstick had been smeared on his penis. And little boys think
theyÕll never wear lipstick!
ÒExcuse me, honey, but I have to take a little break,Ó Sherry said.
She stood opposite her husband and, with loving eyes, began rubbing her
cunt with her fingers. She glanced at me. ÒThis isnÕt exactly ladylike, is
it?Ó she laughed. ÒBut I canÕt help it. I have to have a little pleasure.Ó
Jeff and I watched with anguished eyes for several minutes as she played
with herself. She enjoyed letting us watch. Then, realizing an opportunity
was right in front of her, she faced her husbandÕs cock and introduced his
head into her snatch.
ÒWell, dear, it looks like IÕve got the upper hand now,Ó Sherry smiled
at Jeff. ÒYou WILL cum now, no question about it.Ó Slowly, she drove the
hard length of him up within herself. Jeff grimaced and realized the
battle was lost. I saw a little relief touch at the corners of his mouth. He
was captive, he could do no more. It was time now for him to simply
enjoy, and let himself go.
Sherry gasped as she felt the huge length of her husbandÕs penis
drive up within her. She was in control, yet he was so big, it was like
being in control of the empire state building. They were newly married.
She was still unused to his size. Yet she bit her lip and soldiered on.
When he was quite well up inside her, she began to draw him back. Then,
with him just at her lips again, she sunk on him anew. She would have to
manage the strokes because he was fixed in place. He was like a steer,
clamped down so that he could be used to sperm all the cows. Sherry
bucked her hips at him and rode him more freely as she learned to accept
him inside her body. Suddenly, as she played, her eyes lit up. Jeff was
cumming! Sherry pressed her lips right up to the hole in the wood where
his cock stuck through. She reached out and hugged JeffÕs shoulders and,
straining, they clasped one another. They kissed awkwardly, with the
wood between their loins yet his penis inside her. Jeff came and came and
came, his buttocks straining and compact, his thing buried up inside
Sherry where she could feel every last drop of him flooding her uterus.
Together they cried out. They were in marital bliss, coupled, their loins
working, hers clamping and sucking and his thrusting and pumping.
When at last their course was run Sherry backed herself off of JeffÕs
cock. I watched with saddened eyes as he slowly deflated and, at last,
could simply remove himself from the pillory, without even asking Sherry
to lift up the top half. She brushed her hair back with her fingers. A girl
always looks classy doing that, even if sheÕs staring at a manÕs organ,
wearing nothing herself, with sperm running down the insides of her
thighs. Sherry walked round to Jeff and clasped his balls and his penis.
She could cup both easily now. ÒIÕm glad I didnÕt cut you off,Ó she smiled.
ÒWe do have a knife down here, you know.Ó
Jeff looked a little surprised. But he said nothing. He kissed her
instead, letting her dream of knives if she wished. She squeezed his cock,
his eggs, possessively. He was hers, after all, wasnÕt he? And she was
his. Their kiss deepened and I was left to watch with envy as they shared
a long and intimate embrace.
The two of them looked at me when they finally separated. ÒDo you
think you could come up again so she could have her due?Ó Sherry asked
her husband. He nodded. ÒThen she must be taken home,Ó Sherry said. Jeff
nodded again. Rats.
Sherry walked up to me. She kissed me lightly on the lips and ran a
feathery hand over my forehead. ÒJust relax, dear. YouÕll get yours in a
minute,Ó she said. I gasped and she kissed my whimpering lips and walked
away. Her bottom, lovely and full and seemingly suspended atop her slim,
column-like legs, rolled with womanly satisfaction. She went to the table
and picked up the empty bottle of champagne. Grinning at me, she came
back with it. She stood beside me and put a finger within my mouth.
ÒSuck,Ó she told me. I tongued her. ÒThis should help a little,Ó she
said softly, and put the neck of the bottle against my cunt lips. Slowly I
felt it start to intrude.
Jeff walked up to us. I saw over SherryÕs finger that he was already
getting hard again. The obscenity of her fucking me with the bottle was
arousing him. He began to play with himself, enjoying the sight.
Gradually, as she shunted the bottle within me, making me moan and cry
out, he lengthened and hardened.
ÒThere, youÕre both ready now,Ó Sherry whispered. She removed the
bottle from me but not her finger. Jeff stood close, held himself, like a
man about to urinate into a urinal. I felt fingers part my pussy lips and
then, quite boldly, a cock shove itself up inside my cunt.
I screamed. I had wanted him so long, and now he was here,
breathing hotly on me, the hair of his massive chest against me, his thing
up inside me. I bucked at him, as if to push him away, but it only buried
him deeper. With quick, forceful strokes he fucked me. I panted, Sherry
all the while fingered my mouth. At the same time she tickled her pussy
anew. We would all share this last orgasm together.
MAGAZINE REVIEWS
by holy joe
PlayboyÕs X-GIRLS, $6.95. http://www.playboy.com
Review: Stocks go up. Stocks go down. And now some guy told me
thereÕs a ÒMillion Molester MarchÓ being planned. Apparently theyÕre going
to all march to a playground or something. IÕll keep my ears open for more.
In the meantime, you can worry about it.
As for me, my retirement plans remain unchanged. IÕm investing in
porn. I intend to spend my golden years ÔreadingÕ.
All month long I looked forward with baited breath to PlayboyÕs X-
GIRLS. One reason was I couldnÕt figure out what X-GIRLS could possibly
stand for. Was it girls whoÕd been Playboy Playmates, and then gone on to
star in X-rated movies? Well, it turns out that they are the girls of
ÒGeneration X.Ó (A dumb name, for a dumb generation.) (Just kidding.)
I enjoyed the X-GIRLS. For one thing, the cover is great. But then I
knew it would be, since last summer I sold the Playboy company a bunch of
Òholy joe bras.Ó IÕm no longer in that business, alas. Making womenÕs
underwear turned out not to be a profitable venture. All the girls kept
complaining that their bras, after they put them on, kept getting tighter
and tighter. Finally the girls would rip off their bras, often right in
public, because they could no longer stand them. I thought it was pretty
cool, seeing girls rip their bras off, but apparently the girls didnÕt have
the same opinion of the matter as I did.
Cover girl Leah Darby seems relieved, on page 1, to be out of her
Òholy joe bra.Ó I figure, at worst, the girlsÕ discomfort was good revenge
for all that ÒfashionÓ underwear we men were sold over the years. My
balls never grew to their proper size because I spent all my teenage years
wearing the stuff, hoping to impress some girl. (Unfortunately no girls
were ever interested in seeing me without my jeans on, so what sort of
fashionable, ball-hugging underpants I was wearing never came up.)
There are good ways to get hold of a girl, however. On page 3 you
can see my latest attempt. It worked. ItÕs called a net. I caught Bethany
Lorraine in it. One minute she was undressing for her bath, and the next
she was a ÒguestÓ of holy joe. And my net. Now if only I could get her
untangled from the damn thing, I could actually have sex with her.
Not that I believe girls are only good for having sex, though. They
need to work too. My friend holy shit, who rides motorcycles, but hates
working, put his girlfriend to work. She has a job as a coal miner. You can
see her on page 10. At first the coal company said she couldnÕt work as a
miner. But then holy shit offered to have her work in the nude. So they
relented. It worked out pretty good for womenÕs liberation, in my opinion.
All the coal miners quit hanging ÒgirlieÓ calendars down in the mine,
because they could just look at holy shitÕs girlfriend. She sort of feels
sheÕs getting the shaft, though. She complains about having to wear high
heels while she digs out coal. ThatÕs a girl for you. You let her wear
nothing at all to work, and she wants to go barefoot too.
Working or not, itÕs a good idea once a year to report to your doctor
for a rectal exam. Gina Stasia does just that, on page 78. Here at Fuck
Decency weÕre helping keep down the cost of medical care by offering free
rectal exams. Unfortunately we didnÕt say, Ògirls only.Ó The first day a
bunch of fags showed up. And no girls. No females, even. All day long I
kept having to shove my finger up these guysÕ asses, just so I wouldnÕt
have people say I didnÕt do as IÕd promised. But, from now on, Ògirls only.Ó
Okay? Note that ÒgirlsÓ doesnÕt include women. The last thing I need is
for a bunch of 300 pound women to show up tomorrow.
PlayboyÕs Book of Lingerie, $6.95. http://www.playboy.com
Review: Yep, thereÕs that holy joe underwear again. You can see
cover girl Holly Witt tearing off her panties on the front of this issue.
Personally, I donÕt think Holly Witt is very attractive. And IÕve seen
fashion magazines that have shown girls removing their panties which
looked much sexier. But itÕs the effort that counts, right? In any event,
Holly does get her panties off. If you want to see what her bush looks
like, check out page 1. (Nice bush, Holly. It looks better than your face.)
Uh, oh. I can hear it already. Some feminist, reading this review,
will say, ÒMen produce pornography so they can insult and demean women.Ó
Not at all. IÕm just calling them as I see them. In the case of Tiffany
Taylor, on page 26, I donÕt make insults. I grovel.
And I pray.
(Since lots of guys like Tiffany, perhaps youÕll pray with me:)
THE MOLESTER MEDLEY
(sung to the tune of ÒIÕve been working on the railroadÓ)
ÒIÕve been busy being a pedo
All the live long day.
IÕve been busy being a pedo
molesting away.
Touching little girls,
on their cunts and tits
Driving their mothers out of their wits.Ó
hmmm. ThatÕs not it. Some guy on the bus must have given me that
one. Just a sec.
THE TIFFANY TAYLOR POEM
ÒAh Tiffany, thou art so pretty.
Especially thy hair
And down there
where
My eye doth dwelleth
on so little.
(and yet so much!)
Ah, thine legs,
Whoops! There go my eggs!
Thou art ruining my pants
Will people look askance?
When they see mine crotch?
Thou has botched
My date with Mary Sue,
Phi Beta from P.U.
I fear IÕll wind up single and old,
Sitting in the cold
With naught but thine photo to hold.
But ah, thine breasts!
One could hold feasts.
Would that I could do as I pleased
With thy bosoms
Instead of only with my pecker...
And now at last I gaze upon thy face.
It leaves Helen in disgrace.
Thou art not human!
But a temple.
I shall worship thee day and night.
All else shall take flight.
We shall be one!
Though I remain alone, and undone.
Pretty cool, huh? Drama, humor, the whole works. I figure if
TiffanyÕs interested in bedding a poet, IÕll stand a real good chance.
Imagine having her lying next to me after weÕve had sex, while I recite my
greatest poems to her.
Tiffany, by the way, still lives with her parents. Recently she came
home real late from a date, and her dad insisted on spanking her. You can
see what happened, on page 26. She didnÕt exactly like getting a spanking.
(SheÕs a big girl, after all.) But she loves her dad and obediently reported
to him (after getting some sleep). You can thank our intrepid photographer
holy moly for getting the shots of Tiffany carrying her panties into her
dadÕs bedroom. Holy molyÕs only in second grade, so people donÕt notice
him much. He managed to climb up the side of TiffanyÕs house and shoot
through a window. Thanks to Playboy for printing the photos.
ThereÕs some other good photos in this issue. On pages 16-21 you
can see some pets that IÕm gonna buy, when I get the money. Their names
are Lisa Boyle and Patricia Ford. They said if IÕm willing to feed them,
and give them someplace warm, and buy them expensive lingerie, theyÕll
play around my mansion for the rest of my life. Or at least until they get
bored. I figure thatÕs a pretty good deal. Unfortunately I donÕt have money
to buy myself underwear, much less expensive ÒVictoriaÕs SecretÓ-type
underwear for them. But you never know, someday the Internet may
become a profitable place to make money. In that case, Lisa Boyle and
Patricia Ford are mine, okay? You can buy yourself three kids, a wife, two
dogs and a Ford Aerostar.
Be sure to mark November 18 on your calendar. ItÕs the day two new
Playboy newsstand special magazines are released: ÒPlayboyÕs NudesÓ (a
great, irregularly published title) and, especially, ÒPlaymates in Bed!Ó If
ever there was a title that summed up what God made females for, thatÕs
it.
AND IN THE END...
GOOD GOD! S E L L !
ÒFilm-industry insiders are now confidently predicting that
ÔLolitaÕ will find a distributor in the United States.Ó
- The Economist, October 11, 1997, pg. 108.
-------------------------- Fuck Decency! ------------------------
-Free e-mail subscriptions: No longer available due to mailbombing of
my Internet account(s) by right-wing Christians.
-Currently I am: roller39@mail.idt.net
-formerly I was andrewroller@sprintmail.com, roller66@inreach.com,
roller666@aol.com Read my complete works under these names by
going to: http://www.excite.com (Click on ÔnewsgroupsÕ and search
under my various former screen names). (Also you can read irrelevant
bullshit posted by right-wing Christians.)
-Recent back issues at Usenet newsgroup: alt.sex.stories.moderated
-For all back issues, send e-mail to: file.request@backdrop.com
- Free plug: http://www.netusa.net/~eli/erotica/assm/
-Free minicomics: send a stamped, self-addressed envelope & age
statement to: Jim Corrigan, P.O. Box 3663, Phenix City, AL 36868
- JOIN the worldÕs greatest organization! Send $35.00 to The North
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NAMBLA, P.O. Box 174, Midtown Station, New York, NY 10018.
-Naughty Naked Dreamgirls (Library of Congress ISSN: 1070-1427) is
copyright 1997 and a trademark of Andrew Roller.
-END OF 303 EMISSION
- Rice: Charlie Doze, October 25, 1997.