(Starring Ben Affleck and Matt Damon)
"C'mon, Matt! You're taking forever!" Ben Affleck was pacing around the living room of his apartment. His buddy, Matt Damon, had come over to change into his Halloween costume. "Hurry up! I'm dying in this thing!" Ben was dressed in his high school football uniform, which surprisingly still fit. Matt was going as a cheerleader.
"Alright, alright.. but I can't believe you talked me into this." Matt walked out of the bathroom, and the sight of him sent Ben doubling over in laughter.
"I cannot beLIEVE you shaved your legs!" Matt was wearing a tight cheerleader's uniform that hugged the stuffed bra he was wearing underneath. His legs were indeed shaved, as well we his face, which was colored with lipstick, blush, and eyeshadow. The funniest thing to Ben was the pouting look that he gave from under his exaggeratingly large blonde wig.
"You owe me SO big, Ben. They're gonna laugh me out of the party." Matt and Ben were planning on attending a party at a WB party. They were going to televise parts of it, and they wanted a bunch of "young", "hip", and "hot" stars there. They didn't refuse, but both felt that a teeny-bopperish event was beneath their professionalism. Therefore, Ben came up with the idea of going as football player and cheerleader, to spite those who were in charge of the event without snubbing them.
"Nah, you'll probably just turn them all on. Especially, those Dawson's Creek guys.. You'll put out after dinner, won't you? Muhaha!"
"Shut up! I'm serious, one more comment and I'll just go as Will Hunting or something."
"Alright, Matt, I'm sorry. C'mon, let's walk."
"Walk?! You're nuts!"
"I'm not driving 5 blocks in this city. It's Halloween, no one's gonna take it seriously. Deal with it." That point winning the argument, Ben dragged the grumbling Matt out the door.
*****************
Three blocks from Ben's apartment building, they passed a small street-side building. The sign outside said "Madame Zelda, Fortuneteller".
"'Madame Zelda'?? How unoriginal . . ." Ben grabbed Matt's arm and stopped him. They weren't really snobs, persay, but they loved to make people look stupid if they believed those people really *are* stupid. Unfortunately for them, a fortune-teller who used the name "Zelda" was deemed unworthy that night. "Want to go ask a few questions to the question-answerer?"
Matt grinned. "Sure thing, bud."
The two guys walked through the door, entering a very dim atmosphere containing a plethora of knick-knacks along the wall-shelves, as well as the standard large round table in the center of the room. Immediately a regal-looking woman entered from a backroom.
"Greetings, young men." Zelda had a very European accent. As she said "men" she grinned smartly at Matt.
"Well, hi there . . ." Ben stepped forward with a wink. "We saw your sign, and we figured we had to come in."
"Is that so?" The woman asked defiantly.
"Of course it is!" It was Matt's turn, "with a name like Zelda, how could you *not* be psychic??" The sarcasm was practically dripping off their bodies.
"Bah. You two are as transparent as you are desperate to be better than others." Matt and Ben mentally groaned; it always sucked when they picked on a smart person. They braced themselves for the lecture.
The woman continued, "I will indeed tell you both your fortune." Suddenly, Matt and Ben both found themselves unable to move. "You will go on to your party like normal. However, when the clock strikes 10, you will mentally become your costumes. You, Ben, will become a horny high school football captain. You, Matt, will be Mindy, his cheerleader girlfriend. You will refer to each other by your real names, and will think nothing of it. The rest is up to you. When the clock strikes 10 once more, you will regain control of who you are, and you will retain a full memory of tonight's events. However, after you leave me, which will be immediately after I finish speaking, you will forever forget ever coming here. And no, I am not angry. This is strictly for my amusement. I will be watching."
***********
The next thing they knew, it was 9:15 and Matt and Ben were standing outside the door to the studio party. They glanced at each other, puzzled. Then they shrugged and walked through the door.
When they entered the large, bright party room, Ben sighed. Reporters were everywhere, as well as almost every WB star they could think of. The young and hot ones, at least.
Matt's eyes followed Katie Holmes, who was in a group with James Van Der Beek (Dawson) and Joshua Jackson (Pacey). The guy who played Jack was there, but Matt wasn't the biggest fan of gay characters, if you could call him a fan at all, and had no idea what the guy's name was.
Ben was looking at Allyson Hannigan, who was laughing with Sarah Michelle Gellar, Seth Green, Nicholas Brendon, and David Boreanaz.
They grinned at each other. There was one part of this they were both going to enjoy.
"Meet you later?" Ben asked, turning back to Katie.
"Sure thing . . " Matt returned his gaze on Allyson. "I'll meet you in the coatroom in half an hour."
For half an hour, they wooed their respective pursuits, who responded to their intelligence and charm. James had trouble listening politely to Ben. Ben silently wondered if James, perhaps, had a little thing for Katie. But then he noticed that James' gaze was being drawn to Matt on the other side of the room. 'He must be worried Allyson', Ben noted mentally. 'Fair enough, as long as Katie's mine.' Then he noticed Jack noticing Dawson's gaze and following it. 'Geez, I don't think she's *that* hot . . .'
The night went on, and both men were enjoying themselves immensely. However, as Ben was about to tell some Harvard stories, Matt appeared at his side. Ben remembered their 'date' and politely excused himself from the Dawson gang.
"Whups, sorry Matt, I forgot."
"That's alright, I was having a good time too."
Ben followed Matt into the coatroom. "Oh man, buddy, can you believe how hot Katie . . ." Suddenly a light cackling sound could be heard echoing around the room. The next thing Ben knew, Matt's mouth was firmly pressed against his own. He was briefly disgusted, but then he remembered who he was kissing and he experienced a huge rush of erotic energy.
Ben wrapped his arms around Matt, who put his own around Ben's shoulders. The feel of Ben's very male torso, under the shoulder pads and jersey, really got Matt going below the waist. Ben reveled in the smell of his girl's makeup as he ran his hands along Matt's sides. He could feel the warm body under the cheerleader's uniform, and he needed to get to it. Their tongues began caressing each other as their hunger for each other grew. Ben's hands inched their way around Matt's back, and slowly began to unzip Matt's uniform.
They broke their kiss to look at each other. Ben slowly pulled Matt's uniform down, uncovering his powerful upper torso. In Ben's eyes, though, he was seeing his girlfriend clad in half a uniform and a bra. "Matt, you're amazing."
"You haven't seen anything yet, stallion." Matt locked eyes with Ben seductively as he reached behind him and unzipped his bra. He let it drop to the ground. Ben grinned at the Kleenex that fell out.
"You stuff?"
"Sure, but really, do I look like I need to?" Matt reached behind his back, thinking he was showing his lover a sizable pair of breasts and, of course, a lack of armpit hair.
"Of course not." Ben pulled Matt to him again and they resumed their kiss. Ben wildly felt up Matt's torso, hungrier than ever with all the bare skin. Keeping the kiss hot, Matt reached down and under Ben's jersey, slowly caressing his belly. Meanwhile, Ben reached down to fondle Matt's chest. Matt closed his eyes and groaned as Ben kneaded his nipples and squeezed his pecs. Ben was in heaven, but he pulled himself away from his lover's breasts to take off his jersey. Matt immediately moved in towards Ben's chest, kissing and sucking on his nipples while pushing off his shoulder pads. He kissed a trail intensely along Ben's throat and neck, finally moving back to his mouth. They pressed their young bodies together and slowly lowered themselves to the floor.
Ben rose to his knees and undid the tie on his football pants. Matt reached up and pulled them down, as well as his jock. Then Ben reached down and finished pulling off Matt's uniform. With Ben's pants around his knees, and Matt lying on his back completely naked, they were both excited enough to continue. Ben lied back on top of Matt, who spread his legs apart. Punctuated by a renewed kiss, Ben entered Matt and slowly started pumping his hips. Their rhythm quickened as their kiss increased in passion. This being a new experience for their bodies, though not for their minds, they both reached orgasm quickly. Ben tenderly touched Matt's face and kissed around his mouth, moving down to mouth Matt's pecs briefly. Then he rolled off onto his back, exhausted. They lied there for awhile, appreciating each other's closeness, when Matt decided they should get cleaned up before someone found them.
Matt stood up and pulled his uniform back on. He leaned to get Ben another kiss, and to give his chest another fondle, and then went in search of a bathroom. He entered the main room, and was amazed to see Dawson and Jack from television across the room. 'Where the hell am I?' he thought. Knowing that he smelled and felt gross, though, he knew that finding a bathroom should be a priority. Finally he saw a men's and women's bathroom. He hurried over and was about to walk into the women's bathroom when an elderly man who was sitting outside with some towels winks at him and said "Nice try, but I think not." The man gestured towards the men's bathroom.
Matt was desperate to get cleaned up, so he shrugged and walked into the men's bathroom. He figured the other was full, or that this strange party had strange rules. Trusting the old man not to let any men in while a young girl was using the facilities, Matt unzipped his uniform and pulled it down far enough to stuff his bra again. 'You can't look too good around Dawson Leary!'
Suddenly the door opened and James walked in, with Kerr Smith (Jack) on his tail. They stood aghast while the door shut behind them. Matt was startled at the entrance, but then he noticed James' exposed chest (he was wearing a pirate's costume) and Jack's torso, which was hugged by his tight Superman costume. Matt let his uniform fall around his waist, and turned to James and Kerr with only his bra covering his upper torso. "Like what you see, boys?"
James and Kerr glanced at each other, grinned, looked back at Matt's hot chest, and gave a collective "YES!"