Note: This story was dynamically reformatted for online reading convenience.
 
 {Update: Well that, evolved.  Quickly, I'll get it all blended together
today, hopefully, but just for Frame of Reference, this is turning into the
after effects of the stuff I usually write about, from the PoV of
characters most of which can't Think about it.  That's why it's so
confusing, to explore their confusion, knowing nothing about ancient copies
of personalities, out of times that never happened, in this timeline. 
You're probably about as confused as they are.}

   Eric (MG Oral Sedu)

   Cilia came to show the house, while I was still working on the upstairs
kitchen.  Tying it into the wet-wall from the bathroom, it was a large
house, perfect for partitioning into Apartments for Rentals.  The
downstairs was finished, and I was just working on Plumbing, so I didn't
make too much noise over the presentation.  The first I even knew they were
there was when the boys ran out to the spacious back yard, and started
playfighting with sticks.  I only went down to get some more Teflon tape
when the roll ran out.

   The foyer was open, to the door I hung next to the stairs with the
keybox hanging from the handle.  2 Apartments, 2 renters to double the
investment.  Fairly simple math, but I let her handle that, just fix up the
place, and order the materials if it's all the same to you.  What does she
have to point at, at the end of the day.  A spread-sheet?  "There, that's
what I did." Laugh a little to myself, pulling the tape from the toolbox
built into the side of my truck.

   "What's so funny?"

   A girl, looking down.  A very young girl, or at least skinny and petite.
Dressed to show what little she had, she smiles, and I look up from the
small bumps under her tight peach top.

   "Nothing," shaking my head, "Just business." Not that I wouldn't mind
something more with that Cilia, but she's one of those Professional ladies.
Unmarried, no kids, I never even seen, or heard of her going on a date.

   "Whatcha doing?" She followed me up.  I pulled my head out of the
cabinet, to see her bent over, and the top wasn't too tight to hang down,
under her braless chest.

   "Well, if you must know, I'm installing a Sink Trap to finish out this
kitchen.  Your family looking at the apartment downstairs?" Where you
should be, not bothering me at work.  Standing up, at least her top hung
over the tiny swells of young breast tissue from the spaghetti straps over
her skinny pale tanned shoulders.

   "Pb!" She let her lip slip out from between her teeth.  "Yeah," looked
around, "But I got bored, you don't." She backed up against the door, until
it closed.  "Wanna take a break?" She raised her eyebrows.

   "How old are you?" I shook my head.  Yeah, I looked, but she showed it
to me.

   "Twelve," she shrugged, "Why, that too young for a blowjob?"

   "What?" Yeah, I know.  She came onto me, she wanted it, look what she
was wearing!  What am I supposed to say?  She did it, all of that, and I
came to find she was well aware of how it all sounds.

   "You know," straight for my pants, "I want to suck your dick."

   "Why?" I just couldn't believe it, so I just set the roll of tape down
on the cabinet.

   "I don't know." She thought to herself, shrugged getting it out.  "I
like to, always did." Then got on her knees, and started sucking.  "Mmmmh!"

   It didn't take long.  All I could think about was how rediculous this
all was.  This doesn't happen, for real right?  Sure, guys talk about it,
but guys say all kinds of stuff.  Hell I'd lied about my sexploits as much
as the next guy, just to keep up, but you don't believe them.  Girls, just
don't do shit like that.  Especially 12 year olds, with middleaged
contractors on the jobsite.  They don't just come to you, suck you off, and
wipe her mouth getting out her phone.

   "Can I get your number?" Her tongue wiped a little that drooled out the
corner of her mouth.

   "Nev!?" He mother called, "Boys, let's go." I fixed my pants quick,
behind the door when she went out.

   "I'll call you," she closed it, and I heard her skipping down the
stairs. Kthump k'thump!  Definitely skipping.

   I didn't know what to think, other then she really knew how to suck a
dick.  Probably one of my top 5 blowjobs, but even if these things do
happen, why did it happen to me?  Not like I was looking all sexy, grabbing
a fresh roll of tape from the truck.  Or bent over the sink, what kind of
girl Does that?

   Oh well, I just had the 1 join to finish up, so I packed it in.  Put it
out of my mind, sure she wouldn't call me back.  Yeah, they say that too,
but a quicky like that?  I barely even heard her name, she wouldn't call
back.

   Why I wrote about it, instead of telling anyone.  I knew I'd never be be
believed, just locked up for statutory rape of jailbait.  But I couldn't
get it out of my head.

   Until she did, call back, that very afternoon.

   ;

   Closer (FF Saph NS)

   I took her out to celebrate.  It didn't feel like a date, at first, but.
I didn't know, all right?  In my family, we don't even talk about such
things, it's just silently aknowleged.  And not so subtly reinforced by
Homophobia.  How the men talk, I know what "Dyke" means, and from the way
they say it, that it's bad.  That's all they have to say, I know better
than to go against them on anything.  Especially if we're Family, something
like that could ruin our reputation.  And our businesses are founded on our
reputation.  Yeah, it's "Just real estate." I literally can't tell you how
cutthroat it is.

   "So," she looked up from my fork, absently tapping the side of the
plate. "You said you weren't Divorced?"

   "I was married," I nodded over the plates of Chinese.  "Where I got the
name Taylor."

   "Yeah, you don't look English, so what happened?" She skillfully picked
up noodles with chopsticks, and slurped, loudly.  Best Chinese in town,
which isn't saying much, but she pronounced it "Decent." For a buffet, with
takeout for the kids.

   "It was like an arranged marriage.  Not really, but, huh!  My family
knew his family, so they hooked us up.  There wasn't really any love
between us."

   "So you didn't get divorced," she nodded, and sipped her soup from the
cup like tea.

   "No, I'm a widow."

   "So young!?"

   "Thank you, but.  Huh!  It was a hit, and run.  I didn't see it, thank
god, but." I just couldn't finish that sentence.  "I decided not to
remarry." Is all, I rubbed my arms.  "I got so busy with work anyway, and I
really don't mind, not having kids."

   "They're more trouble than they're worth," mostly to herself, but at
least she took the hint to talk about something else.

   "Not your's, they're so well behaved."

   "In public," she nodded, "They only seem to act out at home.  When we
have a home." She grabbed my hand, in both of her's.  "That's why I was
just so happy, when you invited me out." In both of her's.  "Huh!  Being
cooped up with them in the hotel, and we better seal the deal soon.  I got
a lot of money out of the settlement, but it's going fast with the move,
and the storage.  And I have to look for work, and."

   "It's okay," I rubbed them back, "Just relax, you look like you're
having an anxiety attack!"

   "I feel like I'm having an anxiety attack." She let go to brush some
hair out of her eyes, but held onto mine with her other hand.  "Thanks,
it's just." She looked away, "I'm sure it's just being crowded into the
hotel, but it's the best I can afford, short term."

   "Well, I know a cheaper one where I can get you a better deal, but it's
not as nice."

   "How cheap?"

   "Well, it's a Motel, not a hotel, but they keep it pretty clean.  You
don't have to worry about prostitutes, and drug addicts there," they're
smarter than that, "So the kids might be exposed to it."

   "Oh, they could handle that," she assured me, "But thank you. 
Seriously." She rubbed my fingers, "For everything.  I don't know anyone
here, but I'm glad to have met such a smart, capable woman, as yourself. 
So, at least I don't have to deal with just the men."

   "After your divorce?"

   "Well of course, but men in general.  I heard about the south, but I
guess I couldn't prepare myself for the sexism here."

   "What do you mean?"

   "Well, it's not much different from up north, but at least there, they
try to be subtle about it.  Insteada call ya 'little lady,' and try to take
advantage of you at every turn."

   "Anyone in particular?" I shook my head.

   "Well, there was this one guy, real sleazeball, said he might be able to
work something out.  Groped me right in front of the kids."

   "Jabin." I guessed.

   "Jabin Greene?"

   "No, the other Jabin in town," she laughed too.  "I know everyone in
town, and that shyster thinks himself a Property Lawyer, so yeah.  I'm not
surprised, he's never seen a skirt he didn't want to get his hand up." Even
his distant cousin's wife, it really is a small town.  Honestly, someone
should do something about him.  "Fortunately, he's easily distracted, so
you don't have to worry about him stalking you.  You, um.  You didn't run
into his brother, did you?"

   "He was in the offices," she nodded.

   His office.  "Well, he didn't pay any undue attention to you, or your
daughter, did he?"

   "He's the type to stalk you?"

   "No," I looked down at my plate.  "Not you, but how old is Nev again?"
Sure isn't shy about her body, and it's, developments.

   "Not that I noticed, but thanks.  I'll keep an eye out for him."

   Too bad nobody can do anything about him.  Not without, everything
falling apart.  He runs that business, and he knows everyone in town too.
"Well, be careful around them." All I can really say.
:

   Neville (GBbg Ince)

   Fucking hotel rooms.  Can't fuck around or anything, at least the boys
had their own room through the doors, for some privacy.  I'm stuck in here
with mom, and Erin, even have to share the bed with the baby.  At least
she's out of diapers, but as soon as mom goes out for Dinner, I'm in
charge. So, I get the boys, and tell them we're playing until she gets
back. Real quick, she doesn't leave us alone for long, but Aaron is the
second oldest, so he gets to be the dad.  The man of the house, since our
real dad was in jail.  Along with all the evidence, the childporn, how she
got sole custody.

   But, it's not like we're Victims.  The law just doesn't understand, but
even Erin is into it, and Alan can get it up, enough to fuck her.  Which
leaves me and Aaron, I'm sure it'll get bigger, but I can't help thinking
about that man this morning.  The plumber, there was a good sized dick. 
Not a little toy like this, I didn't lie.  Sure, I like pussy too, and
fucking, fingering, and what have you, but this is my favorite.  I don't
know why, but I love dick, sucking it.  Always did as long as I remember,
and I miss dad.  I know it's fucked up, but I was already addicted, at
least Aaron was done shooting blanks.

   I think it's the cum.  The best part of a man, I'm like a cum junky, and
it's the perfect appetizer for the Chinese when Mom comes back.  Mmh,
noodles.  I go for a walk, find the ash-tray, and get my phone out.  We
wouldn't be in Hotels forever, but I know a guy, and I bet he knows places.
In his line of work, places we can go and fuck around.  "Hey." And why the
fuck did she have to go out, for Chinese, even in this little hick town?

   "Who's this?"

   "Nev, um." Look around, take a drag, "You Text?"

   "Of course."

   "Good, cause I can't talk all the time, but it's not like my mom reads
over my shoulder, and you can send me pictures."

   "What kind of pictures?"

   I covered the mouth piece, some couple was walking by.  Looking at me,
smoking, I gave them the finger.  "You know what kind of pictures, you want
to see me too?" I had video, even!

   "Yeah, when?"

   "Right now, switch to text." I fished out another butt, the second
longest one.  "I wanna see it.  Didn't get a real good look this morning,
but I love your big hard cock."

   "Hh."

   "It's hard, right now, isn't it?"

   "Yeah."

   "Well, show me it.  I want to see."

   "Okay."

   [Eric Brown wants to send you a message.]

   "Oh," that's his name.  Said Taylor and Brown on the side of his truck,
not one of those 4 door ones, but a big one with the bed cut off, and tool
boxes built into the sides.  Pipe and lumber stacked up between them so
they stuck out with a red flag hanging off.

   [Accept] "Yeah." I'd get off tonight.

   [Here...] I searched through the Gallery, found a good video of me, and
dad...

   [I want to see it when you cum.  Your cum all over you.  Cum all over
yourself, so I can see it.] "Yeah." I'm gonna get off good tonite!

   No back seat means he'll have to find a place to take me.  Good, then
I'll have a place to take them, my new friends, when I meet them.

   Just a little setback, we wouldn't be in hotels forever...

   ;

   'Cilia (F Solo Saph Fant)

   "Huh!" There I go again.  I'm sure I'm reading into it.  She just
grabbed my hand to stop me fidgeting, and when she said "Seal the deal,"
she ment real estate.  She's a client, a prospective renter, that's it. 
It's nice to have another strong, confident urbane woman to talk to, who
understands it's not all about dishes, and.  Whatver they think women are
for.  Sex, definitely that, but.

   It's almost like looking in a mirror, not an exact duplicate, I know
there are other women like me.  Out there, back east, where I could afford
a discrete fling without everyone in the county hearing about it, but. 
"Huhn!" She's just, so.  Beautiful.  I thought it would go away, when she
wasn't right there, and I couldn't smell her, but why did I have to go and
think about the way her hair pulled out.  At the table, or it was loose,
and flowing in waves down her back.  Looking at the Apartments, boarding
houses, really.  But when she turned, and it flowed through the air.  The
utility closet under the stairs, right by the door to the garage so that I
couldn't escape it.  Should have held my breath.  Or pull the door behind
me, pushing her in to lie down together, and turn out the light...

   "Huh!" But her hands, her soft gentle hands holding mine.  I can smell
her, skin on the back where she touched me.  Rubbed it with her thumbs like
a gently massage.  I was tense, but for once it wasn't business, or Family,
it was her.  Sexual tention, might as well come right out, and face it.  I
want her, I wanted her the moment she stepped out of the car, and I'm
turning into an awkward stuttering fumbling schoolgirl whenever she's
around, and there's no way to tell if she feels.  Anything about me.  Not
without asking her, and I can't bring myself to talk about it.

   Temptation is what it is.  She has, what I never could.  4 beautiful
children, one just starting to become a little lady, and she looks so much
like her mother.  Even if she does dress like a slut and seems oblivious to
how she's flashing everyone every time she moves.  Eric noticed.  Yeah,
that sick greasy ball of man, think about him, that should spoil the mood.
I need to get this done, tonight, I'm just distracted.  So, stop using this
pen like a drumstick, and get some work done, woman.  So I can sleep
sometime tonight.  They need it in the morning, and I have to do it right.
No mistakes, nothing that could arouse attention, suspicion, on the people
I find myself in bed with.

   "Uh!  Stop!" Damnit Celia, "Concentrate!"

   ;

   Subcontractor [MG Sext.]

   She sent me video.  Okay, here was a real slut.  I never really sent
dick pics before, figured what was the point?  Ooh, a dick.  So what?  It's
just a dick, but she was so into it, and kept texting until the video
downloaded.

   Her, sucking a dick.  From the side, and loving it.  Not faking like
some pornstar girl, but letting it stand up hard to lick his scrotum, and
suck in his balls.  It looks like he shaved, but I could imagine her hands
on my dick, pumping it like this while she sucks my balls, and "Uh!"

   I never get off that quick.  I mean I did, when I was a teenager, but it
shot up my belly, and ran down my thumb.  Just like she said, so I switched
to the Camera, and snapped a pic with my clean hand.  Well, the one I was
playing with my balls with, but they were hairy.  Unlike her boyfriends',
or Man, he was definitely a man, but it looked so huge right in front of
her cute face.

   "Huhhh!" I had it etched in my head now, especially from the side, the
way she sighed, and her cheeks sucked in, around the big hard cock.  Little
wonder how she got a man to suck off, men, I guessed.  Same as me, but she
called back.  Turned out they were new in town, moved here after a divorce,
to get away from her father.  "Abuse," that's all I heard about it, but
enough to get sole custody, and Beverly is a lot like Sicilia. 
Professional, divorced instead of never married, but I see where Nev gets
her looks.  The way their noses both turn up at the bottom, so the bridge
curves out.  Her high round cheekbones, and the soft curve of their jaws.
The thin pale line of her eyebrow on the light tanned skin of her forehead,
this big wide round green eyes, looking up at me.

   I got hard again, just thinking about her, and watched the video to jerk
off before bed.

   Yeah, I want to see her again, but in person.  Next time, I want to fuck
her.  Yeah, she's like 12, but that didn't stop her.  She fucked him,
whoever that guy was in the video.  Never saw more than his dick,
disappearing in the few dark curly hairs over her young little snatch.  I
had to fuck her, soon, or I won't be able to concentrate.

   She wants me to fuck her, she told me, she couldn't wait.  I just need
to find a place, but with so many properties I'm working on with Cilia,
it's really a matter of choosing what ones.  I know the place, it's out of
city limits, and practically no neighbors.  Used to be a farmhouse, why it
never rents, just sits empty.  We use it for Storage now, because people
don't want to drive out to the country to rent apartments.

   Which means we can get away with it, just as soon as she can get away
from her mother.  Takes them everywhere with her, or leaves her to babysit,
her brothers and sister.  At least as long as they're staying in hotels, no
schools, no work, she has to work, right?  Or at least look for a job, the
older brother looks old enough to take care of the other 2 for a while,
while she slips away.  So I can show her the house, just need to fix up one
of the bedrooms is all.  What were we thinking?  Sure, converting large
homes for rental apartments instead of flips is great, but out in the
country?  It was a stupid risk, and a waste of Property tax.

   I should just move out there.  Why the fuck am I paying rent?  When I
own a house, free, and clear, and several storage lockers for materials. 
Stupid, I should just move out here, there's plenty of room, already using
the garage for surplus lumber, and scraps.

   "Yeah." Sounds like a plan.

   [I know a place.]

   ...

   'Celia (FF Saph Sedu)

   Another day, another Parade of Homes, but it was getting harder and
harder to be with her.  Alone, she left the kids at the hotel this time, so
it felt more intimate.  Just the two of us, and that was making it even
more difficult, to keep it strictly professional.

   "So," she leaned back against the end of the bed.  This one was
furnished, though she had her own furniture, in storage, but we discussed
maybe moving some of the nicer pieces.  I know the antique dealers in town
too, but I hadn't seen any of it.  "Huh!  I'm sorry, but it's hard to
remember all these places, with you flirting so much."

   I looked away.

   "Celia."

   "I'm not." Shake my head, "I don't mean to, but.  Huh!" I turned back,
"Did I come off as flirty, to you?" Right, as if I wasn't smelling her
hair, every chance I could get, and trying not to get caught.

   "It's all right," she laughed, "Flattering, really, but it's a
distraction, and." She had her leg, crossed over the one she was standing
on.  Then, she didn't.  It wasn't really, that obvious a sign, that I took
it for, but she didn't stop me.  Taking her in my arms, and kissing her.  I
know exactly what came over me, she was driving me nuts, and had been for
weeks.  I suppose I even showed her places I knew would never work, just to
see her again, be with her again, and she left the kids home, so we could
be alone.

   It was just such a relief, to do something.  Finally feel her, taste her
lips, her body against me.  Falling back, pivoting over the footboard, and
laughing.

   "Come here," she pulled at my sleeves, then the buttons of my blazer
once I was on the bed beside her.  How romantic, eh?  A bare mattress, in a
run down apartment over the donut shop.  Not even any pillows, but it was
finally happening, she truly was attracted to me too, and that validated
all my feelings for her.  I'm just glad all that was over.  Feeling all
that without knowing, it hurt.  It always hurt so much, I felt hopeless,
but I knew this wasn't a dream because of it.  I would never imagine it
like this, the stuffy stale abandoned home smell.  The bare mattress, at
least it wasn't stained and dirty, but finally she had my blouse open, and
her hands inside.  On my bra, my gasping chest, I couldn't breathe but it
was wonderful.

   I finally had what I wanted.

   ;

   "Beverly" (FF Saph.  F2M Diss.)

   "So," It got downright uncomfortable, on the bare bed.  "You want to
show me your place?" We essentially made out, I got to 2nd base, and then
pointed out the obvious.

   "Yeah," she wiped her smeared lipstick.  "Some pillows would be nice."
She fixed her blouse, or cross tucked it, and buttoned the Blazer back on
over it.

   I found her in the bathroom.  She was washing off her makeup.

   "You look better." In the mirror, I kissed her neck.

   "It's just for appearance."

   "Your family."

   "Huh!" She tensed up.

   "I understand, it's practically the country, go ahead and straighten
up."

   "Thanks," she came back Out, twisting up her hair, back in the tie. 
Hairpins, she dropped some, or they came out in my fingers, she picked some
up to fix her bangs.  "I grew up with it.  Not just that, but.  It's just
the way they talk.  They don't call anything what it is, but joke about it.
Like, 'Those jiggaboos next door'." She cocked her head.

   "Uh, that's so racist."

   "I know, but anything.  'That peicashit coffee pot'."

   "That's a yankee accent."

   "Oh," she shook her head, "We're not from here." She looked away, "New,
Hampshire." Lied, but why's the state matter, if it's York, or Jersey. 
Hard to tell them apart, but she's a Wop, playing a WASP, for some reason.
Italian family, and it's hard to avoid the stereotype.  They're all
connected with the mob, but what little she says.  It's hard not to think
she's talking about the mob.  "Especially my uncle Phil.  He kinda took
over, when Popop got.  Well, he, passed on."

   See what I mean?

   "You wanna go for a walk?"

   "Really?" Out in public.  I mean, gasp!  Be, seen together?

   "Come on, it's around the block." Tanned around the neck, I noticed. 
Deep tan, but cut off in the truncated block of her jacket, and her top. 
Whatever that is, happened to be a blouse today, but usually just low
enough to show the top of cleavage, but not really draw you to the shot
down to bra level, if you're looking.  Right out in broad daylight, and
damn it, it's a nice little town.  Antique shop around the corner, so
Apartments means over the mom and pop shop, there's a set of tractor saddle
bar stools, and rednecks.  Leering through the glass, just a gimme-cap
teenager gawking, not even tryn'a hide the obviously sexual fantasy.  Two
hot older women, walking together, he was looking at her, and I was kinda
proud.

   She's a bit of a catch, so am I, just the glaring inconsistency of a
homophobe's lesbian fantasy.  I get it, two hot chicks is hot.  Okay, then
why turn around and call us "Dykes," like it's some sort of insult, only to
go buy playboys, and look at the hot action of plastic bimbo dolls playing
lesbo?  Men, boys, whatever, I gave up trying to understand them ages ago,
despite my, congenital.  Shake my head.  "Huh!" At least we were there. 
Going up the stairs beside/behind the barber's, and still trying to keep it
professional, looking.  Within line of sight of the glass door to the
street at the landing.

   "Huh!" she took my hand, and we started up, already breathless.  Made it
to the door, but she glanced, nervously at the keyhole, across for hers,
and unlocked the door.  Already had the keys out, in, and open in a flash,
then slamming the door with my back, and mouth hungrily over mine.

   "Huh!" And I'm not even a lesbian.  Don't really have to be, with my
memories, especially when she goes right to it, as soon as she knows
nobody's watching.  Paranoid, but all right.

   She makes me feel so sexy, just looking at me.  But like this, "Huh!" I
had to push her face off, to breathe.  So, I just let my hands slip back to
her hair, and guided her hot face to my burning hot neck.  Couldn't tell
which was hotter, call it a tie.

   "Snhhhh," Breathing loudly through her nose, but she did just sniff my
hair.  I mean pulled her head out of my shoulder, and reached up to feel a
lock of it, and sniffed my hair.

   The problem is I keep having these, flashbacks.  I don't know what the
fuck they are, and I can't talk about it, but they're not mine.  They're
not even memories that make sense, like remembering my mother would, but
for some reason, I remembered as my husband.  Displacement, I guess, but I
felt his hard-on, in his pants.

   Now, how could I remember that?  Unless I'm psychic, but if I am, I
don't have any control over that, and I haven't even seen him in over a
year.  But not his penis through his pants, with my hands, or against my
body.

   His lust, what it felt like, having that, attached to him.  Why am I
getting that now, when I'm with a woman, feeling me up in the foyeur of her
apartment?  It's dissassociative, like the therapists said, but knowing the
word for it doesn't make it, feel any less weird, when it happens to me.

   "What?"

   "Nothing," I pushed her back, "But wouldn't you rather do this in your
bed, or something?"

   "Yeah," she pulled her hand out of my panties, and took mine, to lead me
off down her hall...

   ;

   'Cilia (FF Saph/Gg Flashback.  Sorry, folks, they were Dissociative,
both of them.  For different reasons, but they acted without thinking, and
don't even remember it clearly enough up until this point.  What makes it
so difficult to write.}

   It wasn't like.  She has breasts, and pubic hairs.  Just a little puff,
neatly trimmed, but once I felt it.  It wasn't like, I was.

   "Huh!"

   "Good idea."

   In my room, she pulled off her clothes remarkably fast while I unmade
the bed.

   She is beautiful.  Mature, a woman, but none of the signs of age that
would some day, probably still look beautiful on her.  No sag, even
relaxing from unhooking her bra behind her, but then I could feel her
without it in the way, and we wound up in the corner, instead of the
freshly unmade bed.

   They're breasts.  I'm not going to any trouble to describe them. 
Yahnow, tittehs?  Yeah, I love them, but nice, Real pert little handfulls
she really didn't need the bra for more than to hold back, as much as
support.  Don't want them just swinging around between your arms, and show
them off to anyone.

   Just me, in the privacy of my own bedroom.

   "Huh!  You're so aggressive!"

   "Sorry," I backed off, "I'm sorry."

   "No, I love it." She came to me, and we just toppled back on the bed. 
"I thought we came to the bedroom for the bed." She laughed, delightfully
in my arms.

   "Yeah," I reached back for a pillow.  "Huh!"

   "I never, really done this before."

   "Oh," I thought.

   "You did."

   "Yeah, well, there were some other girls.  No-one serious.  Huh!  I had
to hide it, and it was a lot easier.  Uh back east."

   "Where, Europe?  We're on the east cost here."

   "Sorry, up north, but anyway.  I had to go into the city, all the time,
so I sometimes, hit the bars when I felt like it."

   "Lesbian bars." What, did I wince again?  "You don't like that word."

   "Whatvea, huh.  It doesn't sound right, but you wanna talk about it, or
get it on."

   "Well, sure, of course, let me get this off." We had to roll over, but
it's not like we thought it out.  Got out of the blazer again, and the
blouse buttoned down enough to get it over my head.  "You have great
underwear."

   "You like it?"

   "Well, I'm not.  I don't fetishise it," she felt my bra, "But it's nice,
and it looks fantastic on you."

   "Well thanks."

   "You don't take compliments very well."

   "Just not used to it.  No, this is nice, I'm just not comfortable."

   "With it yet."

   "No, I mean never.  My life is just so uncomfortable, always.  Huh, I
just don't know no other way to say it, I've never felt comfortable, my
whole life."

   "I know what you mean, and there's no way to talk about it, so." she
reached around my sides, "Let's get this off of you."

   "Yeah," that's why this is so awkward, "Huh!" That felt better.  To get
off my chest, and then her hands on me.  My breasts, it feels so much
better when you have them.

   "Here," she pushed me sideways, "Lay down next to me," she kissed me,
and we started exploring eachother's body.  Awkwardly, on our sides, but I
guess it's equally awkward, as opposed to one of us having to hold the
other up, at least.

   She's so hot, and flushed, and the lines from her bra are starting to
fade, so I can't feel them any more at least.  She's not a busty woman, by
any stretch, but at least she has some breasts.  "Smq!" This was a woman's
nipple.  4 kids, not going to stop to ask if she breast fed them, but even
a little tough, compared to say mine.  In her fingertips, and that was
driving me wild, but she liked me suckling one, and then the other.

   "Uh!' She pulled my hair out, but it took a while.  The way I had it
done up.

   Actually hard to believe, she had 4 kids, and I mean not even a hint of
any sag.  "Very nice." I ran my hand down her tummy, and followed it down
with my lips.  Kissing the whole way.

   I have done this before.  Every chance I got, and I think I beat around
the bush more then enough all ready.

   Very neatly trimmed, even shaved the pantyline, her legs too, just kept
going to the sides, but was nice enough to leave a short bush on top to run
my fingertips through.

   Kissed it first.  "Is there a zipper, or something?"

   "Oh yeah," I had to turn over, "On the side." I held up the tiny pull on
my hip, pinched between my nails, and ran it down.  Pant suit, no pockets,
but a zipper where there could be if there was one on that side.

   Her arm under me, but she could hold it up, feel down my breast while
she rubbed inside.  My hip, through the side of my underwear.  And kiss my
neck.  He smaller breasts against my back, so I didn't mind her hand,
moving down.

   "You shave."

   "Yes." I nod, and my hair pulls out a little more, against her face.  "I
like the way it feels." I shivered.  "Huhhhhh!" I just felt her hand. 
Through the loose fabric of my pants.  "AhhhhHHHH!"

   "Are you?" She just stopped talking, and went back to kissing my neck
and hair.

   I couldn't answer her, anyway.

   "Bev' (FF Saph.  Talk.  Sorry?)

   I hated to say it.  "You're not, a child molester." It actually hurt. 
"Are you?"

   "What?" She sat up.  "No," she shook her head in her hands, "Oh god no.
I couldn't.  Why would you even think about that?" She couldn't look at me.

   "I'm sorry.  I.  Okay.  I." Can't say it.  "I'm sorry, but the way you
touched me.  Huh!" So, lie.  "I was molested, and." The way I remember it,
"I guess I flashed back.  I'm sorry." But I don't even know how I know what
that feels like when I never had been molested, in my lifetime.

   "HhHhH!  I was, molested.  Too."

   "By a man?"

   "No."

   Then, "By a woman?"

   "No, an older girl."

   "Oh," her chin bumped my shoulder, nodding behind me.

   "What?"

   "It's why you're homophobic."

   "No," she finally turned around, "Oh no." I kissed her, "I love you, I
love this, finally being able to even tell anyone, much less find someone
as wonderful as you.  That's not what I'm afraid of.  It never was."

   "But you are afraid." I can see it in her face.  It's become part of it,
her expression.  It's what she looks like, terrified all the time.

   "Terrified." I sat up.  She turned back from the light.  "Huh, you don't
know what happens to lesbians here."

   "Is that what happened to her?"

   She nodded.  "I," choked up, curled up again in her arms, not caring
about letting the covers slip, in the cool autumn night.  Loving this, the
best feeling I ever had.  "I told them."

   "The police?" I shook my head.

   "My family."

   "What happened?"

   "She went away."

   "She disappeared?"

   "In a matter of speaking."

   "They killed her."

   "No."

   "What then?"

   "Huh," she sat back up.  "They sold her." Naked, not even visibly caring
that she was.  Well, she's always so modest.  Nothing to be ashamed of, she
really has a wonderful body.

   "Like a slave?" Still confused, talking around everything like this.

   "As a sex slave." I nodded.  "They sold her to sex-slavers, and they
took her away!" She just broke down.  "I can't deny it any more, it's all
my fault!"

   "Oh, don't blame yourself." She was really sobbing now.

   "She was eleven.  Only eleven, just starting to grow."

   Just like Neville.  Of course we changed our names, on the run.  She
chose that name, because it had Evil in it.

   "And I'm terrified of your daughter." Well, good.

   "Me too." Then she wouldn't try anything with her.  I noticed, she's
uncomfortable around her too.

   "Why?"

   "Because she's a sociopath."

   "What?"

   "Yeah, diagnosed and everything, want me to dig out the records?  She
was a psychopath, they say she got better, but I'm beginning to think it
made her worse."

   "Wh, who?"

   "Therapists," I shook my head, "They just want to talk.  What harm could
that do?  Well, we found out she's a psychopath, because of the sexual
abuse.  She said, she remembered things.  Impossible to remember that
young, but.  He molested her, he always molested her, and I was just too
blind to see it."

   "And, you." She wiped her eyes, squinted at me.  "How do you feel about
that?"

   "I don't, any more.  I can't, huh!" Shrug, "It's too painful, but
eventually, I learned to think about it.  Dispassionately, because if I let
myself feel, I turn into a wreck, like."

   "Like I did."

   "But you can't Not think about it."

   "I did."

   "Well, I can't, and look how you turned out!  Sorry, I'm so sorry, I
don't want to fight.  It's just."

   "All right.  Huh, I know, it's a touchy subject, and.  You're right.  We
have to talk about it, and I envy you.  I do, if you really can, think
about it without, feeling like this." She'd make a terrible actress, or
maybe a good Shakespearian one, the way she stilts when she's lying, or
overcome with emotion.  "Huh!  Do you, ever have nitemares, about it?" Like
Shatspear, really.

   "Not any, well.  I haven't in a long time.  It's no guarantee it won't
happen again, but I'm already feeling triggered, when I thought I was done
being triggered, and I can only hope we can work through this, together."

   "How?"

   "I know it hurts, the worst right now, in the beginning, but you have to
tell me what happened."

   "Now?"

   "If you can, but you know it was fucking up your life.  You can see that
now, can't you?" I nodded.  "Then whenever you're ready, I'll be here for
you, and I'll do what I can to help."

   "Why do we have to," talk about it?  "Before we can have sex?"

   "I don't know.  Huh, that's just the way it is, sometimes."

   Sicilia (FF...  Yadda^3)

   Okay, so maybe she's right.  About a lotta things, but yeah.  I'm
'Scared' of Nev.  Scared of what might happen, if I got together with her
mom, and, even became her step-mom?

   I kind of hate her, too.  She's slutty, and bitchy, and bossy, and so
god damned sexy, I love her mom.  I do, but, I'm tempted.  And I'm scared
of what I might do, if I gave into that temptation.

   I know I'd hurt her.  It feels like revenge, or the fantasies.  It feels
like Her, I don't even want to think her name, but getting back at her
again, and guilt for how that turned out.  You know, that was Phil's first
time?  I mean yeah, hookers, and even some teenage runaways, but that was
when he really got into that end of the business.  "Fuck it!" the deeper
darker, kidnapping, and selling people, like property.  Not killing them,
far worse.  And that was me too.

   Nothing wrong with, being the way I am.  I just managed to fuck it up so
badly, there were concequences.  So many lives ruined, I couldn't bring
myself to count.  And sure she loves me, but she said it herself.

   "Yeah," I hugged her arm.  "I never did, and I never could.  Even think
about doing it, but, I think you're right.  I am, attracted, to girls."

   "Young ones." She pulled my shoulder, "Turn over, look at me."

   "Huh!" I rolled my eyes, "What?"

   "You lie to yourself, I know that but."

   "Like your daughter, Nev." She closed her eyes.  For a moment, she
didn't look happy.  "Beverly?"

   "I know, it's just.  Hard to hear."

   "I wouldn't, I never would, that's why I'm terrified of her, but.  I
still, feel it."

   "But you're not using me to get to her."

   "No, you.  Just you, huh.  I feel like I love you all ready, but."

   "It's already bothering you.  You want to, imagine I'm her?"

   "No!" Bev, Nev, they're two totally different people.

   "It's okay, i've done a little role-play, you want me to be younger?"

   I looked down, and, she does.  "Huh!" She does have a young, er. 
Feeling body, I guess.  "I don't mind, a teenager all right?"

   "Yeah," she could pass for a teenager, 's body.  "I love your face," I
looked before I kissed her, closed my eyes, it's so mature.  I just have to
look up, to see I'm not really.  Doing it for real.  I'm not molesting a
child, or taking advantage of a virginal teenager, but.  "It's okay, to
pretend, a little."

   "Hhihihn!" She squirmed, delightfully.  "It makes me feel younger, too."

   "You said you're molested." She looked me in my eyes.  "Too?"

   She nodded.  "Yeah," looked away, "By a woman." Remembered.  "Feels like
a lifetime ago."

   ;

   Beverly (FMGBbg...  NS)

   "I don't know," driving out to the country, "It sure is a long commute."

   "Yeahbut," my eldest, "That's why the rent is so low.  How much money do
you have left from the settlement, anyway?"

   "And how'd you line this all up?" I'm a little proud of her, but I don't
trust her.  My own daughter, I know, but ever since...

   "Erik's the contractor for Miss Taylor.  I ran into him at that third
place she showed us?  Yeah, well, he owns this place out in the country,
uses it mostly for Storage, but the upstairs is already converted for
Apartments, there's 4 Bedrooms, and he's not using it.  Said something
about it not working the same as in the city, people don't want to drive
out to a Rental, so it's been like that for years.  Which is WHY the rent
is so low."

   "Well," we are going broke even with the Monthly rate at the motel. 
They were nice enough to agree to it retro-actively, count the first 3
nights for the Week, then the first 2 weeks toward the Month when I
couldn't find an affordable place right away, because of our situation, at
least the manager's Mother was understanding.  Indians, the whole family
lives there, and run the Motel, so they don't have to hire locals to clean
the rooms, but it is such a long drive.

   But still, $750.00 a month, for 4 bedrooms, and half a 1350 Square Foot
house, is really too good a deal to pass up.

   "You're being silly, just because I managed to find it, instead of your
Girlfriend, Cecilia."

   "She's not my girlfriend, and I'm not jealous!" She didn't say it, but
that's always her favorite insinuation, that I'm somehow jealous of her,
after what.  "Huh!" He did to her.

   "Well, just give it a chance, he says it's beautiful, you'll love it."

   "And I don't know about you going behind my back with that man."

   "Mr.  Brown?" she laughed, "It's not like I'm fucking him!  A hahaha! 
Seriously, it's just Business.  Yeah, he hit on me once, but that's how I
set up this deal."

   "How?"

   "Blackmail." She shrugged, "I threatened to tell his partner, who he's
got the hots for too, by the way.  Guess we know why she friendzoned him
now, but yeah.  He's a big fat bald hornball, but he's harmless.  I can
handle him, cause he knows his life is ruined if he tries anything."

   "That's my girl," I kissed her head, then turned back to the road before
the turn.

   "Look around, it's beautiful out here."

   "Yeah," for once she was right, "Huh!  Okay, yeah.  I'm sorry, I've just
been a little depressed, lately."

   "And paranoid, and jealous."

   "That's enough, young lady!"

   "And if you want to go out with Cecilia, I'm sure the boys will
understand too."

   "Huh!" I looked out the window, "Yeah," unspoken, as of yet, "You're
right, it sure is beautiful out here..." But, I felt it.  That attraction,
for the first time in my life.  She's just so, capable?  A no-nonsense kind
of woman, like me, but she never made the mistake of getting pregnant, and
married in high school.  Finding out, he's.  His, disgusting.  "Uh!" How
can I trust, anyone after that?

   "Oh mom."

   "Snh!"

   "It's all right, maybe getting you out of the shitty will do you some
good."

   "Yeah," I wiped my eyes.  "And watch your language in front of the
kids." I always thought I had control over my life.  I was stupid to think
that, but I fooled myself.  "Huh!"
:
Aaron (BG/M...  Just going to leave the extraneous characters out of it,

but yeah.  TW: Rape.)

   He was like a big bear.  Nice beard, and fat ass.  Okay, I'm gay, and I
like big older men.  Bears, I guess, but I only really read about it in my
father's porn.  You know, before he went to jail for loving us.  All of us,
he's a loving man, and he loved all of us.  For some reason, that's a
crime.

   I love Alan too, but he's a little boy, and I don't really like little
boys.  I love them, Neville, and Erin too, but it's not really, sexual
attraction.  It's just how we show our love, in our family, I don't expect
anyone else to understand.  I let her suck me off, because she loves it so
much, and she misses dad too.  I understand that, but she cried.

   She never cries.

   "Hey," he drove the moving truck, also a rental, "Want a hand with
that?" Not really that heavy a couch, and an excuse to talk to him.

   Mom said we won a lot in court, poor dad, but it was burning up fast on
hotels, storage, and even eating out was "Too much expense." It was almost
gone, in just 3 months, almost 4, but it would have saved us a whole lot of
trouble if you just stayed with dad.  Forgave him, and maybe tried to
understand.  It's not like she's really part of the family, she married in,
and now we were stuck with her.  I love her to, I guess.  Or, we would if
she would let us.

   Okay, so she's turning gay.  Big deal, even Erin understands it, and
she's 4.  "Here," I set it down, and he dusted off his hands.  Big fat
rough man-hands.  "Huh!" I could just imagine, but no.  I shook my head,
"Nice place." Looking around.

   "Yeah, thanks for the help, kid." I frowned, "What?"

   "Look, I know you don't remember being young, but we hate that, all
right?"

   "Sorry."

   "Good." I went down the stairs, my butt hot from feeling his eyes on it.
"Let's grab the table next."

   "All right," he helped me slide it out on the quilted blanket.  "It's
your stuff, I guess you're the man of the house now?"

   "I guess," really Nev is, always was.  The man of the house doesn't have
to be a man, but she wears the pants in the family, and honestly, "I really
don't want that much responsibility.  You know, how Mom, and Aunt Celia
fight so much for it?"

   "She's your aunt now?" He looked a little sick, "I seriously had no idea
she was a lesbian."

   "She isn't.  Huh, we don't really have any control over our feelings. 
People in general, we like to think that, but feeling isn't rational, it's
Natural.  They never make sense, we just try to make sense of them."

   "How do you know so much, about it?"

   "I lived."

   "You're 10."

   "Yeah, well I managed to pack a lot into that decade, and I don't have
to unlearn a lot of bullshit leftover from your generation."

   "Yeah right." At least he didn't call me kid.

   "Like your homophobia." I sat down, and pulled the hex wrench from the
tape under the table.  Started screwing in the legs, it's a big family. 
Big table, Alan and I handled it, but, I guess he's off somewhere playing
with the girls, so I get to talk to our landlord.

   "I'm not homophobic!"

   "I saw how you reacted to my mom's relationship with your partner. 
Seriously, you didn't know?  Or did you have the hots for her, yeah. 
That's it huh?  You're jealous of my mom, even while you're fucking her
daughter?" He's actually got bretty good genes, he just wasted them as a
fat old plumber in a little hick town.

   "ShH!"

   I laughed, "See?  You can't believe, kids our age know anything.  You
know everything because you're older, which is why you try to mansplain
everything.  You're a plumber, you don't know shit about us.  You think I
didn't know?  Who else do you think she told, like first thing, as soon as
she hung up?  She doesn't have any other friends here yet, the kids aren't
really old enough to understand, but damn she can suck a dick, huh?"

   "Thought you're the quiet one." He went back down the stairs.  Whatever,
living room/dining room, nice vaulted ceiling where he opened up the attic,
and stained the exposed beams.  Put in new walls to "Jack" up the roof, the
way he said it when he showed us around.  Kitchen behind that, really just
an open space front to back with the bedrooms on the sides.  And a deck,
stairs down to the back yard, really nice place.  Mom said we're lucky to
get it at such a price, but she's out looking for work.  The nice thing is
who cums with it.  Not our dad, or really a father figure at all.  But, my
sister isn't really a boyfriend/mistress kind of girl.  She doesn't love,
she's a Sociopath.  I know, such a big word for a 10 year old, but that's
the thing.

   People spend so long, generations trying to hide these things from
children, and young adults.  It's stupid, you assume we're stupid.  Our
undeveloped brains are incapable of understanding until we turn 18, and
magically become adults.  Bullshit, we're people.  You're wrong, all of
you. We're living proof of that, we do understand, and we can handle it. 
Seriously, your generations are the ones who can't.

   "So," he dropped off the chair.  Dad's, recliner, heavy but he carried
it up the stairs fairly easily.  Big strong man, I didn't try to hide the
growing hardness in my pants.

   "Loving, and very submissive."

   "What?"

   "Haha, don't start that.  Huh!" Roll my eyes, "You can stop trying to
shelter me, all right?"

   "It's just," takes them a while to get used to it, "Your mother made him
out to be some kind of abuser."

   "Well, he wasn't.  She runs the show, you can see that, right?  Well,
it's like her, and Cecilia.  Mom made all the money, so he could stay at
home, and take care of us.  He never raised a hand to any of us, he loved
us.  All." I looked into his eyes, seriously.

   He looked away.

   "Like you love my sister."

   "What?" he looked back.

   "Yes," I nodded, "Incest." Seriously.  "I hate to break it to you, man,
but what the courts called abuse was a loving concentual relationship
between us, and our father."

   "He fucked you too?"

   "No, I fucked him.  As soon as I was old enough to.  I told you, he's
submissive.  A bottom, probably found someone right away in jail.  To love
him, the way he likes it."

   He practically ran.

   "Hahaha!  No, not homophobic at all!" Shame, for such a hot bear, and
all.  Can't wait to get my hands on that nice ass of his.

   "Hihihinh!"

   I turned around.  "Hey," waved her in from the deck.  "How long have you
been eavesdropping?" Kissed her.  She shrugged, with my tongue in her
mouth.

   "That was great," she pushed me back.  My sister, she's like a sadist,
but likes to humiliate and control you, instead of beat you.  Hurt those
feelings, that's what gets her off.  And sucking dick, for some reason.

   "Uh!" He grunted, with 2 chairs for the table that isn't setting itself
up.  She kissed me again, quick.

   "Now don't you get jealous." She took the one he set on the landing. 
"You ever done a threesome?"

   "But," he looked at me, "He's your brother!" Stupid sheltered adults.

   "Huh!  Yeah, we love eachother.  That wasn't the question, you want to
fuck her, while mom's out with the kids?"

   She just pulled off her top, sat down.

   "Yeah," he didn't even look back.  I grinned, let's see what I can get
away with.  "Hey!" He pushed his hands off.

   "Thought you weren't homophobic," she pulled him in by the belt, licking
her lips.

   "It's not gay, unless you're gay.  Just like Celia, going out with mom
doesn't make her a lesbian.  The thing is, everyone is bisexual, gay and
straight are fantasies.  You assume you have any control over your
feelings, cause you're taught all your life to ignore any attraction to
other boys."

   "I'm not attracted to boys."

   "No?" Normally, Nev does most of the talking, but she had her mouth
full. "Well, don't let that stop you."

   "Oh!" he held her head.

   "Because," I slipped his pants down, "We're attracted to you." Straight
guys, they never even think about being attractive.  That's for girls, you
just have to have a nice car, be successful, get a wife, and have kids. 
America, basically.  American Dream Propoganda, and out here in the sticks,
everyone's conservative.  "I can't make you gay," I pulled up his shirt to
lick the sweat off his back, "But I can make you enjoy it."

   "Ah fuck!"

   She was right, "That was quick!"

   "Turn around," I reluctantly let go of the big fat soft balls of his
buttocks, "And bend over."

   "Sptoh!" she spat behind him.  "Relax."

   "No."

   I laughed, picked up his phone.  "I told you," I brought up the chat,
"You can't control this, so stop trying to." I giggled, "Yup, he saved the
chats.  And the pics, and the video." Shook my head, "Fucking amateurs," I
unzipped my pants.  "Literally, huhah!  How's he loosening up?"

   "Please don't." Bent over the dining room chair, helpless.

   "What, show my mom, and your partner the childporn on your phone?" Video
already up on the screen, I turned it to him.  I'd seen it, of course.  "Up
to you," I shrugged, and dropped my pants, "Whether I fuck you, or I have
to rape you, but you really think you get to get sucked off all the time,
and never have to put out?  You're Mine now, your ass is Mine, or you get
to find a real man in Jail.  Up to you."

   "All right," he was really crying now, but looking at my dick.  I'm 10,
it'll grow bigger, but not too small to break his cherry.

   "He's ready," she licked her fingers.

   "He thought I was the quiet one."

   "Mom said," she nodded, and he grunted.  "They think that, because he's
smart.  Always thinking, me too, but smart enough to know when to say
something, or when to just think quietly to ourselves."

   "There," his nice soft pillowy ass flattened around my hips, "That's not
so bad, is it?"

   "Ngh!"

   "It doesn't mean we're dumb.  It just means we know when to talk." When
there's nobody else around.

   Except, our Victim.

   "Ugh!"

   All I could think about was my cum mixing with his, right inside his
back door.  Knocking on the inner door, pushing it in, so he could tighten
up all he wants.  It just made him tighter, press against my foreskin, so I
could feel it splash out against his rectum, and my sensitive exposed tip.
"Huegh!" He grunted when I pulled out, watching it snap back to the
surface, and the mess run out onto his balls.  "Huh!  Nlaugh!" It tasted so
nasty, his ass sweat, and the hairs made it impossible to get it all.  But
we'd make him shave next.

   "Here," she helped him up.  "Kiss him." Pushed his face down to me. 
"This is the best part."

   He didn't kiss me back, so I smeared it all over his mouth.  Really
blubbering, so it mixed with his snot too.

   He went to finish carrying the furniture up from the truck, while I
fingered her off as fast as I could.

   I hadn't seen her so horny since dad left.

   ;

   Sicilia (FFbg Pseu Saph)

   "Are you gonna marry my mom?" Alan, the younger son.

   "Why, I never really thought about it." So, I'm gay.  Finally coming to
terms with that fact, I certainly have no idea how to talk to an 8 year old
about it.

   "She's conservative, sweetheart."

   "Well, I grew up southern Baptist, and I." Recently decided to give that
up.  In favor of another lifestyle choice.

   "Denial." I looked over at the youngest.

   "What?" I shook my head.

   "She's in denial, momma."

   "Yes," she held my hand, "I know, but it doesn't help to hurt her
feelings about it.  Right now." Kissed my knuckles.  "She's still confused
sweet heart.  I hope you can forgive her, being so rude."

   "Of course." I nodded.  "I'm sorry, I." Just didn't know what to feel
sorry about.  My feelings?  "No, I'm not sorry, I just."

   "Confused." The toddler plopped down, and picked up her half eaten half
sandwich.  She shrugged, and took another bite.

   "Try not to think about the homosexual aspects of it.  That's where your
preconceived notions get in the way, try to just feel without thinking
about it." She kissed my palm.  "This," my fingertips, "This you can feel,
how you know it's something real, not somebody else's fantasy."

   "Who do you mean?" Trying not to melt here, but I love it when she does
that.  I'd been with men, but I never had someone make love to my hand, the
way she does.  "Huh!" My head fell back.

   "Men.  They're jealous, and they write all the rules.  So, it's assumed
that the bible says anything about this.  It doesn't, any more than it did
about you playing with yourself." And thinking about men.  Men don't know
how to touch me like this.  If one did, I would have found one, but no man
ever bothered to learn.  To satisfy me, like she does, in ways I never
thought to dream about.  "And feeling guilty about it," she kissed my neck,
which was great, I couldn't listen to her any more anyway.

   I even forgot about the children, until I heard them grunting.

   "What?" I pushed her away, "The FUCK!" Literally, I went from burning
with desire to the worst disgust I ever felt in my life the next instant.

   "It's all right, they don't know any better."

   "But, Incest!?" I realized I was crawling backwards when I felt the
grass at the end of the quilt.  Well, moving blanket.

   "Calm down, relax.  Kids, pull your pants up, you're making Aunt Celia
freak out."

   "Sorry, mom." At least they covered themselves.

   "It's okay, it's all right." She held me.  "Let me explain.  Huh!  I'm
the one who should be sorry, I didn't know how to tell you, and I knew how
you'd react, but.  My husband, he didn't go to jail for abusing us.  He got
caught, publishing videos of our children."

   "Having sex?"

   "Of course not," she laughed against my cheek, "They're too young for
that, but they do play with themselves, and eachother."

   "Your husband, taught them that?" He belongs in jail.

   "Yes, and he's being punished for that.  However, they are sexual now.
We can't unring that bell, I tried for years to make them stop, but that
just made their other behavior worse.  Especially the older two, they
started acting out at school, and getting other kids involved.  So,
eventually I came around to accepting the lesser of evils.  He took their
innocence, but now trying to stop them just makes them take other
children's.  They need the sexual outlet, so as long as nobody gets
pregnant, we have to keep it in the family.  That's the real problem with
incest, is inbreeding.  But society doesn't see it that way."

   "Yeah, but it's not like.  Being gay!?"

   "Isn't it?" She held my head, and shook her's.  "It's illegal, here. 
That doesn't mean it's wrong.  They love eachother, perhaps more,
intimately than most, but that's okay, as long as nobody gets hurt.  As
long as there aren't any other victims."

   "Is that what he told you?"

   "No," she kissed me again.  "My daughter, Neville finally had to explain
it to me."

   "But," I shook my head out of her hands, "She's only 13!"

   "Twelve.  Well, twelve and a half, but irregardless," that's not even a
word!  "If she can understand it, at twelve, and explain it to me, than how
can I argue with it?" She rolled her eyes, "You'd really have to talk to
her about it, I suck at explaining it, but I knew you'd have to hear it
from me first.  Because of her age, otherwise you probably wouldn't have
listened in the first place."

   It just kept getting weirder, and weirder, I never expected, when she
invited me to a nice picnic with her youngest, that it would come to this.
Incest?  "And don't be jealous, I never did anything, sexually with them
anyway.  I'd never cheat on you, with them, and I love them.  Much less
with another woman, so put that out of your mind.  It's just you and me. 
Kids, go play, safely somewhere.  We need to be alone."

   "Okay, mom." Alan led her off by the hand.

   "Relax.  I know, all of this is sudden, and confusing, but." She kissed
my hand, "You'll get used to it.

   .

   ."

   Beverly (FF Saph F"f" Pseu Ephe Fant Role Play)

   "So," I laughed, "You're not into Erin, either."

   "No!," I felt a little sick, "God no!"

   "Good," she kissed me, "Too young?"

   "She's what, 4?"

   "5, but she just had her birthday.  Come on, I know, no need to lie to
yourself about it." She shrugged, "You're ephebophilic, I think."

   "I don't even know what that is."

   "Like a pedophile, but older young girls, just starting to grow?  Here,"
she grinned, pulled up her skirt, "I shaved for you."

   "Huh!" I just felt it, through her panties.  "HhH?"

   She grinned.  "Yeah, just have to narrow down the fantasy.  I love it,
you're so pervy about it."

   "Yeah?"

   "It makes me feel like a schoolgirl, what about freshamn?  Maybe even
middle school?"

   I nodded, but looked away from her face.  It ruined the fantasy, "Yeah."
She's right.  It's hot, like I never got to see Raina.  Loraine, she left
before she even got as old as Nev, but she started younger, I believe.  She
looked more mature, through her clothes.  Not like that, toddler, almost a
little girl.  Not like her sister Erin.  And once i got over the shock of
seeing them, molet eachother.  On the blanket, of course it's sick.  But.
How else would anyone else understand.  How sick I was, even better than I
do.  I could barely admit it, but I can now.

   "Yeah."

   "Your girlfriend." she whispered in my ear, "Your first one."

   "Lori."

   "Yeah, Lori.  She used to touch you like this?"

   "Yeah, you like it?"

   "Yeah, it feels nice."

   "Oh yeah." her bare lips, and the fresh smooth patch in front.  With my
fingers inside them now.  The warm cotton on the backs of my fingers. 
That's what was holding me back.  Denial, a 5 year old said it.  I know
what i am now, what I want to do.  Molest her, but she wants it too.

   "Miss Lago?'

   "Mhm?"

   "I feel funny," she squirmed, "When you touch me like this."

   "It's okay," I ran my fingers through her hair, "Doesn't it feel nice."

   "Mhm?" She nodded, "I just never felt, like this before."

   My hand, in her underpants.  "You want to try it.  Touching me too?"

   She blushed.  Her, grown up, face.  She frowned back.  "Can i?"

   I looked down, "Of course," took her hand.  Young little hands.  Such
skinny fingers, not as smooth as.  I would have liked, but don't pay
attention to that.  "Oh!"

   "Like this?"

   "Ohyes!"

   She giggled.  Right by my ear.  "It feels funny."

   "Hhhh!" I wasn't laughing.

   ;

   Neville (GF NS)

   She didn't want to talk about it.  Or even look at me, I saw the fear in
her eyes, and I just couldn't help fucking with her.

   "Hey," she jumped.

   "Hey uh.  Nev.  You like the new house?"

   I giggled, "Yeah, it's great.  You just gonna stick with don't ask,
don't tell when it cums to our families?"

   "I don't know what you're talking about."

   She tried to walk away, but she's not getting away that easy.  "Well," I
followed her down, "If you don't want to talk about my family secret, and
I'm sure you don't want to talk about your's, I wonder what mom would think
about it?"

   "I don't know what you think you know about My family," she whirled to
point her finger, "But stay away from them, if you know what's good for
you."

   "Sicilia Lago-Taylor.  Yeah, the name's a dead giveaway, but you know
how my mom is with Denial.  I'm sure you can hide it from her, but you
really think I'm the kind of girl you can threaten?  Look around, the only
reason I'm not suicidal is I'm too fucking horny to give that up.  So what,
they'll have me killed?  Yeah, I know, that Lago family.  Lying low down
here, about your," quote "Baptist Church," unquote, "because Catholic would
be suspicious.  Your Jeweler late-husband, the Indian family that runs that
hotel you moved us to.  What did you think would happen to us, there?  Did
you hope, somewhere in that twisted mind of yours we'd disappear?  Just the
kids, mind you, they have children, who speak English, and stock the carts
with toilet paper, and soap.  You think they don't know about the children
that don't go through that hotel?  Or maybe you just didn't think I could
get it out of them?" Right, because what the hell do I know about child sex
slavery, prostitution, and human smuggling?  "You know, you really have
quite an interesting town here.  I'm impressed!"

   "Stop," she wasn't crying, "You have no idea what they can do." Not yet.

   "No, you have no Idea what I know.  They have no idea, which is what
keeps me safe.  They have nothing to fear from a 12 year old, but you." She
shrank back from my finger, running down her arm.  "You do."

   "What do you want?"

   "I would think you would be more savvy than that, considering the family
You grew up in, but what I want is In."

   "You're insane!"

   "Yeah, incest will do that to a girl, but I'm done being a whore, and
not making any money off of it.  You know someone, I know you do, so I want
you to talk to them about it.  I'm not going to threaten you, but you know
this is the best thing for me.  I can't have a normal life, I never had
that potential, but child prostitution?  Yeah, I'm downright Gifted when it
comes to that.  So, make some calls.  You don't want me to do this myself,
because if I can't find the people that're already doing it, I sure as hell
can find some innocent children, even in this town, and your family sure
doesn't want the competition." I can't beat them, I know that.

   So,

   Philippe (GMMMMM NS Talk.  Yeah, right, that's all that happens.  They
"Talk." Spoilers!)

   "Who the fuck do you think you are?"

   "You're the Don?  Where's your boss?"

   "You come in here, asking questions, look around you." My men, with
assault rifles, and this little girl.  Standing, fearless between the
chairs.

   "He looks more like a Youth Minister." I glared at one starting to crack
a smile.  "Nice cover, a Baptist Church, small time local jewelers to
launder the money.  Indian connection to ship them overseas.  Missionaries,
right!"

   "Who do you work for?" Must be, one of those conditions.  We had gotten
others, they looked like children.  Some girls just forget to grow, but
what am I, a doctor?

   "Nobody, yet.  Why I'm here, to make you an offer you can't refuse."

   "Whadda you godda offer?"

   "Well, obviously, I can figure out your little operation, because I did
the same thing.  I was a madam, I ran a brothel back in my home town, out
of a Jr.  High."

   "Not interested." She still thinks I think she's just a little girl, but
I'm wise to her now.

   "You don't want the competition."

   "You're right," I waved, "Kill her." I was getting tired of this shit.
You've got spunk, kid, but that'll just get you chopped up, and fed to
pigs.

   "All right," she was gone.

   "AH!" I had to duck, Bruno flying over my desk.

   "The hard way, then."

   "WHERE IS SHE!  CHKHKL!"

   "She's behind you!  Dumbfuck!"

   "Don't move.  Don't anybody move, or."

   "Shoot him, then kill her." Like anybody gives a fuck about Bruno.

   "TWIL!"

   "KHKH!" I scratched myself, trying to get my manicured nails under the
garrote around my neck.  The fuck she get behind me?

   "They going to shoot you, too?" I shook my head, waved them back.  "You
ready to talk now?" I nodded.  "Good, then don't make me make your men kill
any more of your men.  Sit down."

   "Huhl!  Stop pointing those things at me!" I waved the muzzles away.

   "Sorry, I forgot to mention Desiocrates."

   "The fuck is that?"

   "How I just defeated you, and your room full of goons.  Get them outta
here, and turn on some lights.  Jesus, you could hide a fucking Elephant in
this room!"

   "Do what she said."

   "Good," she came around the desk, "Now we can talk..."

   Isadore {Gg Talk}

   "Oh," she came in the room.  It was like the Dorm, only 1 bed. 
"Isadore, right?" I looked up, nodded.  "So, you speak English, too?"

   "Yes," I shook my head, "I'm from Texas."

   "But your parents aren't from Texas, are they?"

   "No."

   "You miss your family?"

   "Yeah, of course, but."

   "Well, this is just like a new family."

   "But, they hurt me."

   "It doesn't have to hurt." She's white, I think.  Maybe she just hadn't
seen sun in a while, her hair is black and curly, and her eyes to.  "How
old are you?"

   "Seven?"

   "Hh, well I'm twelve, and.  By the time I was seven, I learned to
appreciate, older men.  That's all it is, you're just not used to it, being
with men."

   "Dirty old men, I just want to go home!"

   "I know, there there.  I'm sorry, but you can't.  I wish I could give
that to you, but I can't.  How, Ever.  What I can do is make your new life
a little easier."

   "How?"

   "The problem is you don't know how to enjoy it.  It's not all bad, when
you learn to enjoy it.  You know, there's girls like me with Privileges? 
Yeah, the guys that like the crybabies, they're real Sadists.  They want
you to cry, so they can get off on it.  The good girls, we don't cry, so we
get the good men.  They're gentle, and loving.  They care about us, our
pleasure, and even make sure we enjoy it."

   "So, if I don't cry, they don't hurt me?"

   "If you don't cry, you don't get the bad men.  The ones that like to
hurt you.  We get the good men, who want to love us.  But first you have to
relax." She rubbed my thigh.  "Yes, just relax a little.  Don't fight it,
that just makes them hurt you." She raised her voice, "It's all right, you
can bring in the camera now."

   ;

   Agent Johnson (MG...)

   Creepy little girl.  "Managed to put me on a bus after all."

   "Just get in." I thought I'd seen a lot, in my career.

   "You don't look like Mafia.  So, let me guess, spook?"

   "I can't talk about it."

   "This going to be a long ride?  You don't have to tell me, if we're
going to be working together, you're gonna get used to some amazing
intuition.  You a pedophile?"

   "No." Sick little slut.

   "Well, I'm gonna ned a sexual outlet some time before I start looking
for victims, but you do know who you're getting rid of me for, right?  Are
you supposed to kill me?"

   "No.  The people I work for, are interested in what we heard about your
talents."

   "As a child prostitute?" I shook my head.  "Then by process of
elimination, as an Assassin."

   "How old are you, really?"

   "I can't answer that.  No really, even if I wasn't pathologically
incapable of it, you wouldn't comprehend the answer.  In a word, Ancient."

   "They also said you might be insane."

   "Yeah, or in other words, normal.  Sanity is the greatest mass delusion
in hystery.  Everyone is crazy, it's part of what makes you human."

   "So, you're not human." I was starting to have less trouble believing
that.

   "Human is another one of those immeasurable quantities.  I'm not as
human, and I am more."

   "They said you took on 15 guys with a shoelace."

   "Men," she rolled her eyes, "Always exaggerate, it was just 6 of them."
She shrugged, "They strip-searched me, so I had to improvise."

   "How?"

   "Desiocrates."

   "Yes, I read the transcripts."

   "I knew it!  I knew they had the office bugged.  So, CIA?"

   "No."

   "NSA?"

   "Keep guessing." It was going to be a long drive, and I really can't
answer, but it is an issue of National Security.

   "Well, I'm sure you're prepared to lie when I get there, but just so you
know, I can tell." I believed her.  "So, how about your past.  They don't
recruit you guys off the basketball court, so Ranger?  No, Green Beret."

   "I was never in the military."

   "Yet, you are so disciplined you can't hide it, especially when you're
trying to hide it." she snapped, "Secret Service!"

   ...

   "Right, family.  You guys raise your kids for Secret Service, because
you don't trust anyone else.  So, you a Johnson, or.  Okay, Mr.  Johnson.
Don't look at me likeat, you really want to know how I do it?  I know how
the world works, because I know who made it this way.  We go way back,
before America, so take it as given that I know who killed Kennedy, or I
know who had him killed, and I know why."

   "Is that so?"

   "Yeah, who else can kill the president?  Honestly, America is dumber
than I thought for not getting it, but then again.  Wait," she looked
around.  "Who do you get to kill the President Elect?"

   "Now how the fuck do you know that!?" This little girl was a walking
talking national security risk!

   "Elementary, my dear Johnson.  Look." She pointed at a billboard. 
Pedro, for South of the Border.  "US 1 North, right?  So, they must have
dropped me off somewhere in South Carolina, which means we're heading to
the Capital.  Only this time, you can't just off the guy that suggested
that the NRA nuts can take care of the chick he's running against, right?"

   "So, that's how you put it together, a Billboard?"

   "Who else do you need a child prostitute to kill?  What's wrong, he
already making requests you just can't fill?"

   "He's bad for business."

   "Well no shit!  He's got bad for business written on his tombstone by
now.  I'm surprised he's not already buried in New Jersey.  Guess that
answers the unasked question if you guys are still working with the mob,
then, huh?"

   "We are the Mafia." And the Secret Service.  Always were.

   "Yeah," she looked out the window.  "I know.  Well, you got me.  I can
take care of your not so little problem.  Just put me in the same room with
him, he won't be able to resist me."

   "Can you do it clean?"

   "The time for clean was over long ago.  Tell you what, would anyone be
surprised if it was Auto-erotic asphyxiation?"

   "I doubt it, but I'll have them run it by our analysts."

   "Langley or Quantico?"

   "So you don't know everything?"

   "Of course not, nobody does.  The trick is keeping your mouth shut
unless you know what you're talking about.  Neither of them will have a
problem with that story, go ahead, and ask them."

   ;

   {Well, hopefully this will be more about the Leslita fantasy between a
former mother, and her former Real Estate Agent, but I can't tell any more.
Continuing on from /Parent Directory "The Easy way." (Irony!) If you can
even read that.}

   On the Run

   "You have to go."

   "Where?" Fortunately, her empty luggage was in the bottom of her closet.
"I just unpacked." I threw them on the bed.

   "You killed, two of them?" Men, 2 of their best, not going to name any
names, but after what happened with her daughter.

   "It just," she grabbed some hangers, with clothes on them.  "Happened."

   "What happened?"

   "They came after me.  Threatened me, then it was like." She shook her
head, went back to the dresser.  "It just happened."

   "You killed 2 men!  You just happened to kill 2 professional
kidnappers?"

   "Yes, but." She threw down a drawer full of clothes.  "It wasn't like
me. Like I did, any of it.  And then," she sat down, "They were dead."
Started crying.

   "We really don't have time for this," so I stuffed clothes in an open
rolling.  Box, of luggage, zipper around the front, telescoping handle in
the back, castors on the bottom, one of those.

   "I know!" her hands shook, "I just, let me catch my breath." So, I kept
grabbing clothes, and stuffing them in luggage.  No telling how long it
would take, but we had to get out of town.  "Do you know, where my children
went?"

   "No," thank god.  I actually crossed myself, "Probably where they
belong. My uncle, if he wasn't my uncle, I'd probably already be dead, but
they're alive.  She promised, they're going to nice loving families, but. I
can't, know what happened to them.  They really could be here any minute,
you want to give me a hand with this, now?"

   So, we stopped talking a while to finish hastily grabbing what we could,
and carrying it down to my car.  Still running, my luggage already in back.
"You're coming with me." She looked so relieved.

   "I can't just let you go." I wasted a few moments kissing her, but
really had to cut it short, "Without me, or get killed, or taken away."

   "Come on," she slammed the trunk.  "Where're we going?"

   "The city," not going to say which one, "Real quick.  I have a friend
there, and.  I don't have to trust him, but we need to make a stop when we
get there."

   "Okay, let's go." We got out, before they even showed up at the
farmhouse.  We got away.

   .

   ,

   "Olivia" (FF NS.  Talk)

   "How's that sound?"

   "Yeah," she squeezed my hand, "I like it."

   "You can think about a name too."

   "You've done this before." The witness protection people, came into
town. I had to assume that's who it was, to talk to her.  At the hotel, I
don't even know how I could tell, but I didn't want to be seen talking to
them.  If I could tell, anyone who saw it, or heard about it.  She steadied
my hand.

   "Yeah, calm down.  At least before we have to stop for gas or something,
but it's a dead giveaway."

   "Running from your husband."

   "I was never married." She shook her head.  "Huh, we weren't married,
I."

   "I understand, you had to lie.  You don't even have to tell me the
truth, better the less I know."

   "Cause you're Mafia?"

   "No!  I.  I managed to stay out of it, as much as I could, but some of
my family.  They got in got in" volved?  "In business, with some of them."

   "It's okay, as long as I don't know who, specifically, you can talk
about it."

   "It's hard, all right?" Actually helps, driving for a distraction from
it.  Even out on the highway, but put it behind you.

   "Celeste?"

   "Oh ha ha.  Not funny."

   "So, how about uh.  God, never was that good at coming up with names,
you haven't used all ready."

   "What?"

   "Sorry, talking to myself.  Huh, it's complicated, and confusing, and I
don't understand it well enough to explain it.  But, not you."

   "Well, what did you do, to those men?"

   "Well, they caught me heading for my car.  I took a shower," she checked
her hair, but it had dried.  "Uh, but they threw me in a van, and put a gun
to my head."

   "Then what?"

   "Then, they stopped, and.  Died."

   "They didn't just die."

   "I know but.  I can't believe what happened.  The gun went off, but all
of a sudden it wasn't next to my head, it was in front of me, and I felt
his wrist snap, and he let go.  Huh!  I'm still remembering most of this,
but the slide.  No, the rest of the gun snapped, back in the slide thing on
top?"

   "Yeah, that's the slide." I grew up with guns, all around me.  I don't
have one, never did of my own, much less shot one, but I know what a slide
is.

   "Yeah, I dropped it when the bullet burned me."

   "Let me see." I glanced down, then rubbed the crescent burn on the
inside of her thumb.  "Looks like the casing got you."

   "Yeah, so I elbowed his head into the floor, then went for the driver,
and then I threw up." Gagged a little then.  "Ugh!  Sorry, but.  His face.
Grl kuh!  Uh.  It blew half of it open, and, I ran.  Back to the hotel,
they didn't drive very far, but I just left the van there.  Pulled over on
the side of the road, and didn't even close the door.  I looked back once,
but I kept running."

   "Yeah, well you're lucky they didn't send a car, to follow you. 
Underestimated you," after what happened, with her daughter.  They didn't
even say what happened, but they looked scared.

   They never act scared.  You don't know these guys, but let me tell you,
you can die of just looking scared in that business.  Or at least get the
hell beat out of you, to teach you a lesson, and set an example for
anybody.

   "You look scared."

   Probably why I didn't make it into their business.

   "What did you do for them?"

   "Well, you know.  I found them places." What I do.  "I didn't know, what
they used them for, but that town's not really big enough for 2 Real Estate
agents.  Pretty much just the one office, and you saw just about anywhere a
family could live in the area."

   "And a few places we couldn't, but.  Huh.  You don't know, where they
took them."

   "Your children?"

   "Yeahbut, you know, the kind of place.  You got them?"

   "They don't use any one place, but it's not the kinds of places, you
could show as rentals.  It could be a barn, or a warehouse, even a grain
silo or something.  That's the point, they don't own anything, with an
address." Just the church, where nothing happens on premises.  "They just
use them, maybe for an hour or so, maybe overnight, but everything comes
Through town, nothing stays there."

   "So, smuggling, but human trafficing too?"

   "I just found out.  Seriously, I told them where to go, they told me to
stay away from there a couple days, and it was always clean when I came
back but."

   "But they sold your girlfriend."

   "I knohoho!" I had to pull over.  "But I couldn't."

   "I know it's hard to think about."

   "No, I couldn't do anything, uh!  About it."

   "But sex slaves."

   "Pedophiles," I nodded.  "From what I heard," from her daughter, "If
they don't cry, they don't hurt them.  They'll be fine," I held her, or we
held eachother.  I lied to her, "They're.  They're smart enough, and.  You
know, sexual enough.  Huh!  They told me, they're very well behaved, and
they'll be fine."

   "We have to go back."

   "No," I held her shoulders.  I looked her in the eyes, "Nev told me."

   "She what?" She shook her head, "What did she say?"

   "She said 'it's where we belong,' just like that.  'I know it's hard to
understand, but we can't be out there, in the real world, with normal
people.  We need to find homes, people who can love us, the way we need to
be loved'."

   "Pedophiles." She nodded, sniffed, and even wiped her nose.  "She's
right."

   "I know," I put it back in gear, and pulled back into the lane.

   ;

   "Cordelia" (FM NS Deal Fave)

   "I need a car."

   He came from around the counter.  "What kinda car."

   I looked him straight in the eye, "A clean one." Nodded.

   "Well," he patted my back, "We don't really sell cars here, but." Led me
out the door to a real loud part of the yard, "We might have something that
runs lying around.  You in trouble?" He lowered his voice, even over the
noise of power tools on the other side of the corrugated metal wall."

   "Yeah, uhm.  I don't have much of a trade-in, but I'd rather you
recycled it.  Rather than sell it for it's full value.  As a favor,
donchaknow?" Didn't wink, didn't have to.  He's, not really in the
business, with my family, or their businesses.  Just a guy I know, that can
get rid of a car.  He knows my family, and not to ask any questions, but
not too well.  Why I went to him, if you know what I mean.

   "Yeah, he hit you?" He looked me over, but checking for marks.

   Bruises, maybe around my bare arms, but "Nothing like that."

   "You didn't take anything, from Them?"

   "No, but.  You know who I'm trying to get away from?" He nodded, "Yeah,
well you could say I'm taking someOne, from them." I nodded at the car.

   Around the corner, he picked up a mirror from the back of a truck. 
Looked at it, picked at his teeth, nodded.  "Uh huh?" Tossed it the back.

   "They took a lot from her, but we're going to need some time, too.  If
you hear them asking around."

   "All right," he just walked around the corner, "Get her inside," looked
around, "And don't worry about this.  You owe me, but I'll take care of
it." No questions asked.  He didn't even have to say it.

   Shame, nice car.  I took care of myself, didn't have a man to do it, but
the beater they got.  "It's perfect." Yeah, they'd never even think I'd
touch a car like that.  Station wagon, I leaned over the seats to pull the
little beige curtains inside the back windows.  "Roomy," maybe put the
seats down, and get a mattress, or something.  "I don't have much, but."

   "Well, you already owe me, but I only payed $400.00 for it." Scrapyard
prices, my brand new Mercury already stacked with the other blocks of steel
that would be trucked off to a smelter when they had enough to send a load.
Today, he promised.  "$Fivehudret otta do, for the books.  You girls be all
right, all right?"

   "Yeah, thank you."

   "Seriously thanks, you're a life-saver."

   "Don't mention it," he laughed.  So, we laughed too.  Not gonna happen,
but he knew that.

   "Comfortable?" I just kind of collapsed in the seat, while she drove
off. "Yeah, you look comfortable." I felt free!?  "For once."

   ;

   "Liv" {FF Saph Fg Fant.)

   She threw the phones out, as soon as we're on the highway again.  "Take
the loop around."

   "Why?"

   "So we're not heading West."

   "North or south?"

   "Doesn't matter, better if it's random."

   "Okay." When we stopped for gas, she got a map.  And when she went to
put it in the glove box, she pulled a gun out.

   "Huh!" She held it down.  "Just watch the road."

   "Where did you get that?"

   "I guess he left it for us, don't worry.  It's clean.  Scrubbed down to
the serial numbers.  No note, but." She opened a box of bullets on her lap.
"Huh!" She relaxed.  Snapped the cylider back in the side.  Loaded.

   More than I'd ever seen her relax.  I lived in fear, a little, and even
remember worse, but, now I get it.  I barely got a glimpse of her family,
and her business, but she lived in fear her whole life.  I giggled.

   "What?"

   "Sorry, but you're really a Mafia girl." For real!

   "Yeah," she laughed, "I was.  I never, handled these things, but.  I saw
it enough." She put it on the seat, her leg over it, then hid it under her
skirt.

   "You don't know how to shoot?"

   "Yeah, Pellet guns.  A little when I was a girl.  You know, brothers and
their friends."

   I shook my head, "Only child."

   "Oh, what was that like?"

   "Well, lonely I guess.  Huh, I guess my boyfriend took advantage of it,
but.  I ran away with him."

   "How old were you?"

   "Fourteen.  I know, but he was so charming, and I was so naive."

   "Oh no.  I know lots of guys like that!"

   "I bet!" Big family.  "Well, I was so in love with him, and my dad
flipped it, so he said him or me.  Meaning him, my boyfriend, but we
couldn't afford to get married."

   "What was he like?"

   "Lazy?  Good for nothing?  A loser, honestly.  He said he looked for
work, but it always wound up being me, getting a job."

   "While he stayed home with the kids."

   "Well, I didn't think it was like that."

   "But when you found out."

   "By the time I found out, it was too late.  I didn't divorce him, we
weren't married, so when she reported him to her teacher."

   "Nev?"

   "Yeah, sorry." Shake my head, "Erin wasn't born yet."

   "So, she was, how old?  At the time."

   "Well," I had to think, "She's 5 years older, so.  5 or six?"

   "And he made you work, pregnant?"

   "Huh, no." Really sick of talking about this now.  "Maternity leave, and
unemployment.  When I wasn't pregnant."

   "But 4 kids, in 5 years."

   "Yeah," I guess.

   "Is that why you look so young?"

   "Well, I am, I'm twenty one.  All right?  Yeah, he basically used me as
a baby factory, to molest our children, and I was oblivious."

   "Yeah, you want to pull over or something?"

   "You want to drive?"

   I looked over.

   At her face.

   "Oh."

   "Yeah, maybe after a little break." I forgot how much this stuff turned
her on.

   So, I pulled over.  Found a spot, just off the highway.  There was a
gate, and some road equipment behind it, but it was pretty deserted, and we
just climbed over the seats.

   "Now," she put her knee over her lap, "Don't tell your mom, or
anything."

   "Okay, miss." Well, can't use Lago any more, or Taylor.  "?"

   "Williams?" Good enough for me.  "It'll be our little secret." She
winked.  Got her jeans undone.  She looked good in jeans, never really wore
them before, which is why I loaned them to her.  Maybe some hair dye, too.
One of the kits with bleaches in them, since it's black, but she always
wore it up anyway.  Business, as usual, but we're changing all that.  Kind
of deciding, we both get to pick who to be from here on out.

   "Starting to grow up," I didn't wear a bra.  Just nodded.

   "Huh!" her face was so hot, in my neck.  She lay me down, sideways on
the huge back seat, by the way.  Old car, big old car, lots of space, to
fool around.

   I don't even remember anything this intense.  I guess because it was all
someone else.  Or a delusion, an oddly prophetically always right delusion.
I know, I'm insane, but, why is it always right?

   This felt right, even the creepy older woman, naive teenage girl
fantasy. "It's just like touching yourself," she had my hand in her
underwear, "You touched yourself before, right?"

   "Yeah," she was swollen, and pretty wet.  "Thinking about you.  Huh! 
From the moment I first saw you, I couldn't help thinking about you, and
touching myself."

   "Uh, yeah?"

   "Yeah, like this?" I rubbed it in, with the part of my hand between the
palm, and my fingers.

   "Oh yeah!" She pushed the back of my hand even harder.  So I got my
other hand under her top, and pushed her bra off.  She was grinding my hand
into my crotch now.  In front, through my clothes, other than already being
topless.  "Uh fuck, yes.  Fuck me." I had to feel for her opening, but I
managed to get my fingertip in, pinned between us like that, but even my
knuckles grinding into my crotch had me so hot, and I was about ready to
get off as soon as she did.  Or when she got done.  moaning loud, and
quivering around my fingertips.  Mostly, I didn't get them in very deep,
but 3 of them.  "AhhhHahH!  FUGH!" She fell over me, so I had to put my arm
up, but that let me wiggle my first finger out, and hook the other two in
deeper.  "Anyehyehyehyeh!  FUgme, Nh!  Fugme, yeah!"

   "Did I do good?"

   "Oh, mmH!" She kissed me hungrily, holding my face, and head so tight,
but moving her mouth around, and kissing mine all over.  "You did so good.
You're such a good girl!"

   "Oh!" I already had my fingers out, and rubbing my crotch so fast. 
"Yeah."

   "Yeah, good.  Faster."

   "Touch me!" Her hands on me, "Touch me all over, huh!" It was so intense
and exciting, I couldn't wait to get off.  I felt a seam give a little on
my side from her yanking my panties down, but I didn't care.  I just put my
legs up, so she could get her face in, her mouth on my pussy, and feel her
passionately kissing until I finally felt it break free.

   Yeah, that's exactly what it felt like, breaking free.  Our first time,
really having sex.  It was such a relief.  It never felt like that again,
either.

   ;

   "Roberta Chance" {F..."g" Mono Diss.  For Dissociation, that's what that
Story Code means.}

   Yeah, it's risky, but worth it for the girl I love.  Even my hair feels
different, not just lighter, brown, but Idaknow, drier?  I'm sure it's
damage from the bleach, and dye, but I fixed my trucker cap, and adjusted
the mirror.

   Up from her, curled up on the mattress in back.  "Huh!" Pretending to be
something else my whole life.  "Ahahahahaha!" For the first time, I get to
chose what.  Or whom?

   The lady at the mattress store, with her husband, but 2 women come in to
buy a mattress.

   "Mhm?"

   "Step sisters," I stopped hugging her shoulder, "Since she married my
brother, I thought what better way to get to know eachother than a road
trip?" She didn't seem to buy it.  Lied my whole life too.  You'd think I'd
be better at it.

   "So, on the way back from the wedding, we could save money, and sleep in
shifts." she yawned, Okay yeah, it wasn't all my idea.

   But she's, so?  Okay, it's weird how she looks so much younger, and so
much older at the same time.  Her face, there's a face that had seen a lot.
Of pain, suffering, and struggle, but that body of hers.  Wrapped up in the
new comforter, got as much cash as we could before they froze our accounts,
but I don't want to think about money right now.  Or who might be looking
for us, I want to think about us.

   Not too old, as long as she feels like that.  "Hhhhh!" Nice and petite,
I can't even imagine her fighting, and killing 2 men, but I guess they
struggled with the gun, and she got lucky?

   She can lie, and act much younger.  I guess those schoolgirl days are
fresher in her head, but it takes, all this drama, and trauma away.  Like
she basically said it would, it helps.  Now was the time to be someone
else, so how about someone I like?  Not that stuck up coward I was,
controlled by everyone around her, and living in fear.  That's not me any
more, bury her pathetic life, and move on.  To be free, that's the best
feeling, next to sex, and this was sex unlike I could ever hope, or dream
of.  I glowed red hot for hours after that first time, and all I have to
think about is her.  Looking up from the seat, that cute little girl voice
she does, she really is a good actress.  Hard to believe she was basically
just a schoolgirl, and a brood mare for a reproductive abuser's sick
incestuous.

   Don't even have to pull over, I can just put my leg up, slide the
shoebox back under it to feel up my lap.  Under my skirt, so what if some
trucker looks down, and sees me.  "Uh!" God I'm so hot, but it doesn't have
to be my hand.  Or even my leg, "Yeah, you need a ride?" A runaway, to keep
me company on the road.  Leaving my abusive husband, her running from her
touchy feely father.  "Yeah!" Glad I didn't bother to fish a fresh pair of
underwear out, just a skirt, and stuffed the jeans back in the bag. 
Stacked up over the windows in back, maybe rig a curtain over the back with
the rods the next time we stop.  Switch drivers, make love, and hit the
road again.  Who cares what road, if we don't even know until we get to the
fork, then they can't predict it.  Get ahead of us, and be waiting. 
Instead of heading North, or West, either one's predictable, but we woulda
needed a boat to head East, and south is just a bad idea.  Where do you
think all the drugs, and central American/caribbean island non-citizens are
coming up from?

   "Huh!" Which unfortunately means zigzagging through Alabama,
Mississippi, Arkansas, or Texas, neither one a particularly enticing
prospect, but we don't have to stop.  Anywhere, just stick to the back
roads until we get somewhere liberal enough that we can live as a lesbian
couple.

   Or, you know, a teeny bopper, and her young hot bodied girlfriend.  And
any young girls I can find on the side.  I know, I'm just learning to stop
lying to myself, but she ain't gettin' no younger, and it's not like that
went away.  They seem to get younger, and sluttier every year.  "Fine,"
with me.  So find a nice young slut that likes older women, and stop
playing games.  Or, keep playing games with her, but it's only a matter of
time before I'll need the real thing.  Closest place we can legally get
married is Colorado, but that's a long drive.  Enjoy her while it lasts,
but those promises of forever, and ever?

   I know that's a lie now.  I don't want to grow old together.  I know
what I want, she'll do for now and I need her.  If I'm being honest with
myself, but she's not really my type.  She plays it well, but she knows too
much, has seen too much, and that's not what I want in a woman.  I want a
girl, before she becomes a woman for me.

   But that's what she gave me: I don't have to lie to myself any more.

   Liv (F Solo...  Fg Mnem, FF Age Play)

   Well, that, wasn't romantic.  It sure felt good, or sick, twisted, and
exciting.  It triggered a flashback, but at least it wasn't my flashback?
Like I know, I stopped trying to know, it's not like I didn't try denying
it.  I suck at that, so whatever psychic ability makes me able to
understand a sick predatory sexual exploiter, I dreamed about it.  But
again, it was one of those dreams that are so real, and right that I can't
help believe are either memories, or prophetic, and there's no way to tell
the difference.

   But not a young lady.  A teenager, a little girl.  A really little girl,
like maybe about as young as Kelly was when she was seven or eight?

   As much as I miss them, but before my youngest was born, and I named her
Elly?

   Always sexual, if not violent, but at least this one was just, mentally
predatory.

   "Your mom know you're out, after dark?"

   "Fuck if I care, she don't." Mouth on her.  Didn't ask her age,
obviously too young.  "What, you're gonna tell me it isn't safe?  There's
men like you out there?"

   "What do you mean, men like me?" He started looking nervous.

   "Hahahahah!" She looked up.  "Ahahahahaha!" Still there.  "Yeah.  Come
on, you don't have to lie about it, if you can't even hide it."

   "Lie about what?"

   "You want me, you're sex pervert."

   "No I'm not!"

   "Yeah you are, come here.  Takes one to know one, sit down." I put his
hand on my thigh, patted it.  "You know there's other child molestors out
there, right?"

   "Yeah, uhuh?" His hand was shaking.

   "Well, then you got to know there's girls like me, who like it?" Rubbed
it up and down.  Practically pushed the skirt out of the way on the way up.
"This is kind of public, you don't want to find, someplace more, private,
do you?"

   "HUH!?"

   I could feel the road, going bye under me through the mattress. 
Practically felt the vibration through it, and horny as hell.

   I don't know why, I have such fucked up fantasies.  No, that couldn't be
real, what kind of boy dresses like a girl to lure older men, and that felt
ridiculously large under the skirt.  Shake my head, "HEAH!" Yawn loudly. 
"Where are we?"

   "Nowhere Oklahoma."

   Explained the rhythmic bumps of the road surface.  I swear they pave it
in patches, and seal the cracks between like an oversized sidewalk.  "You
want to find a place for the night?"

   "Yeah, a hotel.  I need a bath," at least, "And I'm horny." Ask me why
that sort of thing turns me on.

   "Yeah, if there's a cash don't tell, probably be a motel."

   "Like I care, just as long as there's a bed, and bathtub."

   "Yeah, we can work on Beyond when we get to it.  Yawanna look one up?" I
really love her accent.

   "Sure," I climbed over the seat, pulled the Pay as you Go phone off the
box of ammo in the glove box.

   It's Oklahoma.  It's not even that weird here.  Stick out like a sore
thumb cause it ain't a pickup, and there's no Make a 'Merka great agin
sticker holdin the bumper on.  Yawned again, but quietly.

   Drug store, just have to reboot it from the Senior Talk operating system
dumbed down from, Linux, I think.  I don't know, I'm not even sure how I
know this, I just thought it up!  It had Android on it as a backup anyway.

   "Good-night Inn?" Turned out to used to be a Knight's Inn.  They just
took some letters off, painted them, then got some more like them, and left
the outline of a K under the new coat and hyphen.  "Or the don't ask hoe
tell?" That kind of place, in the middle of nowhere, by itself across the
interstate from a gas station.  Didn't have a sign for when the next one
would be.

   We laughed, together.

   The door closed automatically.  Had to block it open, but I grabbed the
other new sheets.  Okay, she might be trying to pretend to be this, dykey
trucker, thing she was working on.  But there's some things she can't live
without.  Nice sheets, fucking expensive, nicer than anything I slept on
before, and so fine you needed a magnifying glass to tell were woven out of
fibers at all.  "Room service."

   "Ah?" She grinned, so wide mouthed her teeth weren't even together.

   "I'll have the bed made up, and be out of your way in a jiff."

   "Oh, no hurry." Behind me, bent over to pull of the cheap worn out half
a comforter.  It looks okay, horrible patterns, then you get under it and
find out you need the polyester blanket, and the rough sheet to protect you
from that.

   We brought comforters.  2.  So we don't have to fight over it.  Or she
did, well I payed for it, because that's when we found out her account was
locked.  Right before mine, but at least I had enough warning to cash out.
Yes, hotel rooms are expensive, and I just bought a whole mattress and
bedding.  But this was like a honeymoon, never had one myself.  So, it it
can't be romantic, I'll be damned if we're going to spend the night
sleeping in the car between walls of suit cases.  I already did that today,
it ain't all that great, and $35 bucks a night.  Probably hourly rates, and
a rolodex of hookers if I cared to ask.

   Like they'd give a shit.  Lesbos, in Oklahoma?  Yeah, there everywere.
Where do you think they go, to get away from their husbands and fathers?

   I'magine.

   ;

   "Bernadette" (Fg saph pros fant.)

   "That's all right," just enjoying the view, "No hurry."

   "Okay miss Williams." Honestly, she looks more like Charisma Carpenter.
Not like she's changed much, but more like Angel's Cordelia Chase than
Buffy's.  Hey, I even watched that, worthless rag of testosterone, The
Expendables, why?  I'll give you 2 guesses.

   And, while I'm trying out this not lying to myself thing, she's good at
acting the ditz.  Not a thought in that pretty little head, not all the
time, but she nailed it.  For me, I'll even hazard a guess because it's
some power trip.  Feeling older, and smarter than her.  When we're playing,
we're just playing around, but it's all kindsa sexy.  Isn't getting old
yet. "If you stick around, maybe you can earn a nice tip."

   She stood up, "How nice?" Looked interested.

   "I don't know," I checked my pocket book, "Depends on how nice you work
for it." Up close, practically backed up to the bed, those big eyes going
wide with understanding.

   "Mrs Williams!" Playing hard to get.

   "That's my husband's name," I sat down, "Why don't you call me miss
Carpenter until I get the cards changed."

   "But, you're married?"

   "Separated, I guess we haven't done all the paperwork yet, but," I
hugged her hips, "You ever been with a woman before?"

   "No?" She looked around, but started smiling, guilty.

   "But you thought about it, huh?"

   "Well," she took my lap, "Not like haven't, had sex for money before,
though." She combed my hair back with her fingers on the sides.  "I just
never had a beautiful woman, like you, before."

   ;

   'Liv" (FFMmm NS)

   Shitty fucking diner.  "Uhrp!" Gave me gas, and everything.  "Greasy
fucking bacon." Guess they don't know to pat it off, or can't be bothered,
ran all over my plate too, but some of that might've been from the eggs.

   "Hey, which one of you's the man?"

   "Huh!" I straightened up.  Perfectly relaxed, but my slouch went right
away.  "If you haven't noticed, we're both women, how about you?" I looked
over his friends.

   "What about me?" Yup, the tall one.  All rednecks, but one's a little
older, so he gets the bros.

   "You're the man," I waved my finger around, "Right?"

   "Yeah, but."

   "But what?" I got up, well under his face, at least.

   "We're not fags'r nothin." He looked around, as if to check.

   "That right?  So, you think every woman that's not your cousin is a
lesbian, it's a wonder you're still single.  Sure you haven't thought about
it?  Finding a real man?"

   "Stop calling me that!"

   "What, man?"

   "Crazy hippy chicks," he tried to blow me off.

   "Don't," he put his hand up, "Touch me." I put it down, with a twist.

   "AhH!"

   "Don't look at them, you knew you're the only one with balls when you
walked up here.  What's wrong, too scareda women to talk to one of us
without 2 boys to back you up?"

   "I ain't scared, AUH!"

   "How 'bout you?" I turned, "You?  You might want to run now."

   "Ah, fuck!  You're hurting me!"

   "So, now ya skeered?  Look, both your friends are gone, and everyone
else can see you getting your ass KICKED!" Literally, but I let his arm go,
so he could stumble away.  "Have a nice life, man." I stopped at the door,
snapped for the keys.  "You're still here?" He scrambled into the truck,
and sprayed gravel off to go pick up his boys.  "Keys?" She threw them
over. Still shocked.  "Thanks."

   "Where did you learn to do that?" Now my hands started shaking.

   "I didn't."

   "But, you just.  How the hell did you do that?"

   "I don't know." I switched it from reverse to drive.  "It just happens,
sometimes." Like those mooks in the van.  "I don't have any control over
it." I took off before the cops came.  Later than we would have, if we
didn't have to stop to get harassed by yokels.  "We got to get the fuck out
of Oklahoma."

   "For assault?"

   "Huh!" I shook my head.  "If you're going to be so bad at hiding how
much you're in love with me, yeah.  We better head to some place more
liberal if you're gonna stare at me across the table with googly eyes
whenever we stop to eat.  I love it, but seriously.  Huh!  I'm sorry, but
we're still not safe.  We're not going to be safe here.  I figure our
closest bet is Colorado."

   "Yeah," she nodded.  "I guess you're right."
   "It always is."