{Now, I'm not using the word "Shewn" in this one, but even Lovecraft feared
the Puritans.}
Hand, and Hand {g-F Mast Frip...}
"Grace?" I look up at the porch.
"Uhuh?" I catch Polly.
"Now you know that is no way to answer," she steps out in her plain brown
dress, sweeping the white boards.
"Yes maam," I look down, and Polly looks up from my hands. She has the same
dress, just like me!
"Now come in," she sweeps back into the kitchen, "It is time to wash up."
"Yes maam." Polly comes to, up the stairs, and in the bathroom, where she
is already drawing water. I put Polly in the sink, and mother helps me out
of my dress, then shirt, slip, and underpants.
I step in the basin, look up at her, sliding the step over to kneel on it.
I sit, and put my head down, close my eyes for her to pour water on me. My
hair floats around my legs, and I giggle. "What is it, dear?"
"My hair tickled my legs again," I looked down, but she swept my hair away,
behind me to stick to my back.
"Look up," she has that face on again, "I told you, that's, sinfull."
"I don't like being tickled," I lied, two, but if she didn't know, she won't
beat me.
"Oh," her hand lifts, pats my head, "That's good, now stand up." Sweeping
my wet hair behind me, "You know never to touch down here," taps me, and I
jerk, in pain. "Especially there."
"No maam."
Ronnie {bg NS}
My ball rolls to the back of the yard. It's hot back there, and I check my
phone. Still no call, none of them coming over, I bend over at the fense.
"Hmmhmhmm," must be that little girl, lives back there. I never talked to
her before.
"Hey," I roll the ball back, and sit on it.
"Hmn?"{Refrain from Simple Gifts/Lord of the Dance}
"I'm Ronny," I wipe my hand on my shorts, but she can't even see me, much
less shake my hand.
"Oh," something swishes back there, "I'm Grace."
"Nice to meet you," I think. "So, you guys is christian?" I mean, I seen
her, and her mom, buttoned down like a librarian, can't even see ther ancles.
"Yes, we go to the Quaker church, but mother was brought up in The Society
of Believers in Christ's Second Appearing."
"Hun?" I shook my head.
"Others also sometimes call us 'Shakers'."
"Why?" I wonder.
"I think it's cause we dance in church."
"Wow," not Homish, they have a car, but, I can't remember. "What's that?"
Not up on my Puritan sects.
"Idaknow, I don't know any other Shakers." She stops a seccond, "Ronny, are
you a Boy?"
"Uh," last time I checked, "Huh?" Like she never talked to a boy before.
"Well," I scratch my head, "What do you believe?"
"Uh," she thought, "We give up wordly things, and live rightously, and
piosly until we get to heaven."
"Wow," sounds fun! "Yeah?" I pick up the ball, and answer my phone.
"goodby ronn."
Grace {g solo NS}
"Okay," onesies are easy, "My turn." one two, thr3 4r, a big ball bounces
across the yard.
I go get it, it's dirty, and bigger than my head. "Uhh," that Ronny boy, he
doesn't speak propper English. "Can you throw it back over?"
"Uuh," look up, "I can try!" It looks so high, and I never played with a
ball this big before, so I picked it up over my head, and jumped, and threw
it, and landed in the dirt. It bounced and rolled away, "Wait," got up,
"Let me get it," I carried it back, "HnhT!" I got it most of the way to the
top, but it bounced off again, and I ran after it.
The fence scraped, like a Big Bad Wolf was climbing it, but it was just
Ronny, or his head. He looks real dark, and his hair is black, like his
eyes, he must be in the sun a lot. "Okay, throw it up."
"Nht!" not even close, I catch it before it rolls to far. Must be a boy
size ball.
"Okay," he sways, "Try holding it up, like this, and,"
"Uhn!" almost, he falls down with a whomp sound. "Are you okay?"
"Yeah," he starts climbing up again, and I look up, and Mother is at the
door.
Ronny {Fg Puri Span}
Jesus god damn, she broke out like the wicked witch, snatched her to the
porch, and beat the hell out of her skirts. She cried, but didn't fight
back, struggle. Now, my daddy didn't beat me likeat when I took the car out
of gear, and rolled it down the driveway. I managed to get down, and stomp
the brake with both feet, but took out the mailbox first.
Anyway, I jumped over, and got the ball. There was a loud click behind me,
made me jump, and the witch dropped her hand from the bolt. Not old, but
her face so tight, it looked like a skull, lips tight over the cheeks, and
eyes I couldn't look at.
I threw it over quick, jumped, and aimed for the nailheads for the center
board, kicked up to catch the tops before the ball hit. I mean damn, she
could come out of there any second with that rolling pin, I hit the ground
running. Made me think about that little girl, having a mother likeat.
I mean I had freinds, went to church, and stuff, but they got let out the
yard ever once in a while. She could be about my age, remember to ask her
next time she's let out. Dear god, I wasn't raised likeat, but she sure put
the fear in you. Hair braided up behind her like some brown knot to cover a
misshappen head, evil.
"God damned!" I blasphemied, but that was about right. Hell on earth, I
read up on them Shakers, and wasn't real pleased by it. By giving "worldly
things," they ment sex, and my history teacher says that's why there ain't
no Shakers no more. Except lone holdouts, mothers teaching daughters, how
to be a propper lady.
So, she's a good girl, knows her place, nothing wrong with that. But. That
no sex thing doesn't make no sense, I mean where did Grace come from? She's
not gonna pass that onto her kids. I mean,
I never met a girl likeat, and she's kinda pretty. The way her mother
might've looked before she shriveld up with rage.
Grace {FgbM Fdom NS}
Mother was very angry, she spanked me, and took me crying up to the
bathroom. I was "filthy," and she scrubbed me hard, all over, with the soap
brush, and the towel.
Then she took me in her car, around the block to his house. She beat on the
door, and screamed until he opened it. She demanded to speak to his
parents, but they were both at work, and she was spanking him by the time
his mother came home, and it was hard to believe he was her son.
I mean, she was so white, with hair the color of sunlight, and sky blue
eyes. She tried to calm my mother down, and was so much taller, so she just
pushed her back by the shoulders, and mother, she doesn't like to be
touched.
His father came home, dark, and filthy, black chemical stains on
his navy single peice suit, with his name on it. She called him "Mr Mason,"
instead of [Manuel].
"Mez`on," he corrects her! The police had to come, and take her away. I
could barely make out her ranting, by then, she always speaks so propper,
but they didn't sound like words I know, more like someone at church, taken
by the spirit.
"Pappy?" his father answered, "Yeah?"
"Can I drive her home?" he pulled out the keys, "Sure."
Ronny {bg NS}
"Grace, right?" I take the Karman, cause I can reach the pedals. "Yes?"
"How old are you?" almost as tall as me, "Eleven."
"Metoo! When'syour birthday?" She looks down, "July fourth."
"Really?" Just turned, "This it?" I guessed.
"Uh," she looked around, "The next one."
Maybe the other way round the block would be faster? "See ya?" she didn't
get out of the car.
"Uh," she looks back from the front porch, "I'm not supposed to be by
myself."
"Okay!" I parked it, and got out. "Nice place," porches on both sides, and
little sub-roofs, with square windows in the ends, four panes, with like
white crosses to hold them, and I don't think they open.
"Thank you," I swear, she bowed, and plucked at her skirt, like I saw her
mother do, when she was trying to act polite.
"Uh," I didn't want to sit down, the furniture was ancient, and looked
fragile. "What do you do here?" Not a speck of dust, I checked the carpet
for checkerboard pattern. All a sudden I felt trapped, like when would her
father get home?
"I don't know," I'm surprised she used a contraction, "Play with my dolls,"
I'm pretty good in English, but her mother talks like a teacher. "What do
you do?"
"I don't know, play with freinds, work on cars with Papy," shooting, you
know, boy stuff.
"You're really half Mexican?" she blinked.
"He's a Meji`con," Papi's joke. "Yeah, he's from Mexico, moved here when he
was a kid, I don't know a lick of Spanish." My mom's so Anglo, I look
mediterranian, or something.
"But Mexico is so far away." Past Texas, the grander river, the
Appilatians, and the Potomac, I remember right.
"Yeah, well dad left for, Political reasons, so we kept going. Mom met him
in Boerne, that's over by San Antonio, and pappy, he's pretty charming, and
sophisticated for the stereotype. He's from Mexico City, and he was wealthy
enough to get out when it, got bad."
She just nodded, didn't ask any questions, or speak unless asked one once
her initial curiousity was satisfied.
"So, you really just play with yourself here all the time," she blushed, and
tried not to giggle, "I mean, by yourself, you don't have any freinds?"
"At school, and church," her face tightened, "But there all girls. Do you?"
"Go to church?" no, "Have freinds?" shake shake.
"Play with yourself?" she giggled.
"No?" I look away.
"How?" she bounced around in front of me.
"What?" I don't know, "The normal way?" I shook my fist in front of me.
THUNK! car door, sounded like a full size sedan. Her dad was tired, sat
down, and listend while I told him what happened, and Grace nodded agreement.
Grace {g solo}
He was so, I don't know, are there words for it? I mean, he drives, and
he's my age. And he does that. I still don't know how, I mean, he pulled
at something imaginary in front of him, but that didn't sound right. Daddy
put me to bed, and locked the house, and went to get Mother.
He's not like daddy, he's so, free. I sigh, and reach under the covers to
touch myself. Where she told me not to, it hurt the way she hit it, so I
was real carefull. Right where the pee comes out, there's a flap, but it
doesn't hurt to touch it, if I'm gentle.
Yeah, free, to talk any way, say ever, instead of every, cause it's
quicker. Run around, noone waching him, alone, house to hiself. Like now,
it was almost scarier knowing she was coming back than that there was noone
here. "NhnnN!" I didn't have to hold my breath, be quiet, for fear she
would hear.
It feels good, kinda tickles, but not that strong, or are there words for
this? Not hot, nor cold, but both, kind of like when you're sick with a
fever, or the other way around. Not a cold sweat, but hot, with goose bumps
popping out under the covers. I took them off, and my dressing gown, and
pajamas, and underpants, and layed back down.
Deep breath, that's much better, and another one, slipping my fingers back
down my tummy. The soft smooth bulge, split in two, the warm flap, puffed
up now, and something in it. Like an erasor, but shaped funny, now I was
shivering, but felt so hot. I yawned too, so I pulled the covers up, and
fell asleep.
And dreamed about him. Like a grownup with all he could do, but my age,
that little car he drove. All curvy, like a bubble, the beetles parked out
front, but low, fast, two doors, and seats. I bet I could learn to drive
it, not fast, but wherever I want to go, like Texas, or wherever.
Looking back, at the children, laughing, and playing in the seat, a boy, and
girl, with black hair, and eyes.
Ronny {b solo}
So dad let me drive, around the block. I didn't call him, which's why he's
pissed, but I told him what she said, they were like the Penitente's.
Punishing themselves for their faith, living hell to get into heaven, a lot
of America is as ignorant as Mexico.
I didn't tell him the last part, about playing with myself, or talking to
her about it. He's a recovering Catholic, still doesn't do that, or want me
to. I couldn't help it, though, as soon as I was in bed. Can't sleep
without getting her out of my head somehow.
So curious, her mother would probably explode if she heard her talk about
this. With me, no less, what did she call us? Not wetback, spic, or
beaner, but "Dirtblood," like some witch from Shakespear.
But she asked, I didn't mean to say it that way, it slipped out, but she
jumped on it, wouldn't let me change the subject, called me on the lie.
No matter how scared she was of the witch, she still wanted to know if I
jerked off, "how?" Just like this sweetheart, I'll show you some time, and
so much more.
Grace {bg Solo Voye}
"Mnh?" I wiped my eyes. Light, through the window, my covers must have
pushed the drapes back. Over the fence, his house, room, him in the
window. I sat up, squinted, it was real far away. I can't open the window,
daddy had a fire drill, and I was supposed to break it out if I had to get
on the roof.
He pointed, down at his pants, and made to pull them down. I covered my
eyes, then mouth, peeking, and holding back the giggles. Oh, I got it! He
doesn't have a crack, and flappy thing like me, at all. I squint, but he
holds it up, something, I can't see real good.
He pulls on it, like he showed me, and I layed back down. It looked like he
really enjoyed it, and I touched myself again. I could pinch it, the little
flap, and pull it like that, but with my thumb, and fingertip, not wrapped
around like that. "Oh!" I put my other hand over my mouth, and looked.
He was shaking real hard, and fell back, on his bed. Then, he turnt off the
light. "n!" I pulled, and the button slipped in the skin. "n, n N nNnN!"
I can close my eyes now, think about him, free enough to turn on the light,
stand on his knees on the bed, in the window, and play with himself for me.
"NnNnN!" my fever broke, and sweat rolled down my face like a tear, wet my
finger. "Nhnhnh!" lights danced, like fairies, tingles swirling up my
tummy, around my shoulders, neck, cheeks, chest, and I couldn't breathe. I
fell asleep, drifted away, knowing anything that felt this good had to be
sinfull.
Ronny {bg NS}
The witch came back the next day, and once again, it was hard to believe
someone so pretty came out of something so ugly. I mean, she even has a
wart, on her cheek, and hairs sticking out of it. I bounced my basketball
back up to the fence, and heard her playing on the other side.
"Oh," I looked down, "Hey, Grace."
She giggled, "Hey Ronny," whispered.
"Uhh," So curious, she watched me, jerk off, her hands down her pants. "You
guys really don't have sex?"
She covered her giggle this time, and took a while to answer. "Mother says
it's sinfull."
"Hh," I sighed, "But yaeah, but, you know she did it, right?"
"No?" she waited a long time, "Well, how do you know?"
"Well," I mean, "She had you, right?"
"Uhuh?" not catching on, "So what?"
"So," she didn't know, "That's how you get pregnant," there I go again,
saying what I think, instead of what I should.
"What," her voice got even lower, "sex?"
"Yeah," didn't they teach her anything? "Where did you think babies come
from, the cabbage patch?"
"In sunday school, they say God waits until we are ready, then gives the
mother a baby, like Mary."
So backwards, and ignorant. "Well, in Health class, they say a man puts his
penis in a woman's Vagina, and little sperms come out, and make her
pregnint."
"Oh," she thought, "There's mother, i have to go."
Grace {g solo}
"Hnh!" I slowly rolled the ball, back, and forth to Polly.
Mother was upstairs, drawing a bath, so I went in the other room. She had
her sewing machine in there, and the loom, and boxes, and the steamer
trunk. I looked around, and used a butter knife to pop the lock, like a
tongue sticking out with a keyhole in it, I don't know where mother keeps
the key.
Inside is all kinds of stuff, fabric, and blankets, and her mother's quilt,
and a little basket. In there, I find the little flat box. It's got holes
in the front, and back edge, but I just put it in my pocket quick, fix
everything, and sneak back in my room.
"Come on, dear," she stands in the door, and I drop my dress on the bed.
She fixes the drapes, and helps me out of my slip, and underclothes. Then I
put on the robe, and follow her back to the bathroom. The mirror is already
steamed over, and the water is real warm. I wait for her to turn, get the
soap, and step to pee.
"NhnH!" it feels so good, the warmth spreading in the water, between my legs.
"Oh!" she looks up from the water, "Stand up." My hair isn't even wet yet,
but I feel it between my legs, sliding down, and gritty. She dips the
washcloth, and wipes up my leg. "Now, you haven't been touching yourself,"
her finger slips, out from under the washcloth, "Here?"
"Nh!" my knees buckle, "No, maam."
"Good," her finger slips back, "You are still Pure." She opens her eyes.
"Uhuh!" I can feel my breath on her finger, and then she slips it out.
"Mother?"
"Yes?" she looks in my eyes, like her's reflecting mine.
"Did you have," I take a breath, drop to a whisper, "sex to have me?"
"Mary Grace," she only uses my first name when she's angry, "Where did you
hear such a thing?" she pulled down the towel.
"A freind," I look away, "At Sunday School, she goes to public school, Jr.
High, and they told her in Health class." I know, more lies, but you don't
know how she gets.
"Hhn," she puts me on her lap, in the towel. "Yes," she nodded, "But sex is
not a game, you play, or for, pleasure." she drops to a whisper, "In the old
testament, God said, 'Be Fruitful, and Multiply,' and that is how He made
us, to have children. But we mustn't enjoy it, especially us women, it's
supposed to hurt, our sacrifice for the gift of giving life. Like the
blood, it's coming every month now."
"Uhuh!" look down at the cloudy water, my hair is still dry.
"That means you are becoming a woman now," she pushed me off her lap, and
got up. "Come now, lets get you dressed, and ready for dinner."
It's still puffing on the stove when we come down, and she takes the lid
off, and serves beef, and potatoes, and cabbage from the garden with little
corns of pepper still stuck in it. She says Grace, and we all say "Amen,"
and I'm careful to eat good, and propper. She hadn't gotten mad all day!
The sun went down, over the fence, and she tucked me in, and sang to me. I
know all the words, but don't understand them all, where it says it "'tis a
joy to be free," I don't know what that's like, but it sure sounds nice.
And what is this joy they sing about, I mean, I seen it, in church, but
never felt it.
And she prayed. "Heavenly Father, please protect us. Especially our
Grace," her hand brushed my hair back to the pillow, "From the temptations
of the world, in the name of your son, our saviour, Jesus Christ, Amen."
"men." I closed my eyes, and snuggled up, and she turned off the light.
"Goodnight, dear," she left a crack in the door, the light on in the hall,
shining on my feet under the covers. She could come back, any time, and
look in.
Her Eye, sweeping around, staring, watching, I turned over. "mnh?"
His light came on, and I pulled it out from under the pillow. Cold, the
flat metal box, felt the hinge with my fingers, the button with my thumb.
It snapped open, the little glasses flipping up in the holes, like a
triangle, and I held them up.
He smiled, kneeling on his bed, his pants coming down, and I covered my
mouth.
Ronny {bf Solo Voye}
I borrowed Papi's scope, the little 1.4x, from the .22. Back in Mexico
City, he just worked on cars as a hobby, he says, but now he does it for a
living up here, so he started shooting. Anyway, she was real careful, got
up, and closed the door. It's to far to hear, but the way she held the
knob, I know she was silent.
The witch, omnipresent, omniscient, always watching, for God. I don't think
I like Him, her God, or Dad's. I mean, if you go through the whole thing,
and think about it. Well first, he creates the whole thing, everthing in a
week, takes a break, then goes to fuck with Adam. He's pretty happy, don't
know no better, and tells him about these two trees.
On the right, you got Immortality, life everlasting, and youth. As long as
you don't eat from this. On the left, the tree of knowledge, and Death.
Nice big fat red juicy apples, hanging just out of reach, dangling
temptingly, I guess the life tree's like oranges, or something.
<Color=Red>"Oh Yeah,"</c> He looks down, <R>"Here's Your Wife, Eve."</R>
She finally stands back in the window, bright with the setting sun, I can't
see to good, but aim away from the reflection. Check the other ones, no
sign of the Witch, duck down lower, brace the scope on the corner of the
sill.
So many clothes, how they don't burn up, shirt buttoned up around her
throat, dress, petticoats, and, OhhH! She pulls her hair back over her
shoulders. No bra, but now I see why even little girls have to stay
covered. Wish I could zoom in, on her chest, soft round cones, pinched at
the tips by pink circles, seem to darken in the orange light, like her chest
blushed.
She smiles, holding up the opera glasses, then drops them, behind the bed.
The light was going away anyway, dying down to a wash of twilight on her
window. I lay back on the bed, jerk off, and get out The book. What the
hell, ifn I wanna understand her, I might as well read the damn thing so I
know what they're talking about.
Now, where was I, oh yeah, the book of Job: {(c) God, inc.}
Grace {f solo NS}
Mom let me read, after prayer, and the Hymn. I put it in my Bible, so she
couldn't see. He threw it over the fence, "The Wizard of Oz," {L.F. Baum}
and it was about Dorthy. She lived in Kansass, I don't know where it is,
but theres a tornado, carries her house away to this strange place, and I
fall a sleep.
Mom wakes me up, gets me dressed, for church. We have to hurry, we're late,
and they're already singing inside. She kisses my forehead, and I skip off
to sunday school. The girls class, I raise my hand, ask again were babies
come from. "God waits untill you are ready, and gives you a baby, just like
Mary."
"Well, I heard a woman gets pregnant when she has sex." She looks shocked,
"Who told you?" like one I learnt there weren't no Easter Bunny. "So, Adam
had to have sex whit Eve, to have Cain, and Abel, but for that she had to
eat the apple, give him some so they'd see they was nekkid." The other
girls giggle, "So it's the same deal! We get paradise, heaven, Eden only so
long as we are ignorant, and obedient. Otherwise, we go to,"
I jerk up, awake in bed, thank God I didn't really say that, in sonday
school. Blink away the flames, wiggle my toes, feel the blood go back in
them. "HhnhH!" I lay back, so hot in the summers with the bed, and the
covers, and the dressing gown, and the pajamas, and the underclothes.
"Hnh!" It's almost light, and I'm dressed before the light starts coming up
over the roof when he wakes up.
I unfold the glasses, and he looks over, smiles. Mother is already up,
downstairs in the kitchen, so I put up my hand, make the Okay sign. He
slips the cover down, it's stiff and swings up to hit his belly. I'm
dressed, can't think about touching myself, I think that's why we wear
dresses, and slips, and
"ohH!" from the side, I really see how he grips it, his pinky, and ring
finger on his leg. He rolls over, toward me, and slowly pulls it up, and
down. He has a little skin on the end, like me, and it pops back. "Hnh!"
mother's coming, I open my door before she even gets to the top of the
steps.
"A'en." I tye my bib on so I don't get my shirt, or dress dirty, sop the
eggs up with the toast. We don't talk at the table, but that means we get
done quick, and mother kisses dad goodby, and he drives off, and she takes
me to the church. They have school every day, cept saturday, but most girls
just come on sunday. It's a little church, with a barn for singing, and the
lord's prayer, and communion, but mother takes me around back.
Theres a hall back there, and I run down it to the girl's class. There's
all ages in there, and I'm one of the eldest, soon I'll be allowed to watch
the whole service. I keep such thoughts out of my head, here, He could be
watching. We say the Pledge of Allegience, and I start on math first.
"Uhh," Differential Equations, might as well get them out of the way. {Yes,
she's learning Calculus. High school level, but advanced. Amazing what you
can do when you apply yourself, have neither health, nor physical education,
because you are a girl.} The teacher doesn't have to pay much attention to
me, or the other teens, so she mostly pays attention to the children, reads
them a story from the picture bible, and I ignore it.
Mother wants me to go to seminary, cloister, but I'm getting good grades
anyway in case I get to go to college. Well, my English isn't doing so
good, but I'm real good at math.
Ronny {mf NS}
The witch was late for once, so I crossed myself, and pulled up to the front
of the church. "Society of Friends," like it's some big secret, "Meeting
Hall." It's a barn, painted white, circular window on the end, cross peice
splitting the panes, some expansion behind it. "Hey, Grace!" reach across
to push the door open, "Need a ride?"
"uhH," she skips up, "Yeah!" She had the grey dress on today. Homespun,
her mother makes it, from scratch, there's a spinning wheel in the basement.
"It's okay," I unlock, and turn the seat for her, reach into my shirt.
"Oh!" she looks up from my chest, the silver chain, and cross, was my
grandmadre's.
"I started reading it," good story, don't believe a word of it.
"What?" she blinks.
"The bible," pull it out, pull away. Danuntdanuntdanunu! The witch pulls
up about a block behind me, and tears around the front bumper. "Thinking
about joining a church." They can marry, another Quaker, and what happens
behind closed doors will be between us, and God.
"Oh," thinks, "I finished that other book you loaned me, I don't have it
with me."
"S'ok," she's not supposed to be home by herself anyway. "Here, I'm done
with this one." In, like 4th grade, but I checked it out for her.
"[Alice in Wonderland]" she read, "Is it good?"
"I think you'll like it," more freedom, still confusing surreality, but less
of a victim throughout, maybe Narnia next, he was Quaker, right? "Here we
are," pull up beside the driveway, new bumper stickers nice, and visible.
She goes up first, I hang out in the front yard, look up the street, follow
her up when the door opens. "You have a key?" three, actually.
"Hhn," I stepped back from the door, "Father gave it to me after she," looks
back, "Went to your house." Head down, always, her hair covers her face,
and she doesn't have that bonnet her mother wears. Not all the time, but
she even has one?
She turned from the now locked door, and tucked the key in her pocket.
"You're still playing with yerself." For a seccond, she sounded like
wednessday.
"Uh," shake my head, "You figured out how?" I set the Book on the table, and
sat down in a chair.
"Uhuh!" she plopped down, spread her skirt on the loveseat. "Wanna see?"
"Huh!" I held my hand up, "We have no idea how long your mom's gonna be,"
THNK! speak of the witch, I uncrossed my legs, leaned over, and pulled the
bible onto my lap. "Now," flip back the pages with the ribbon, <Color=Red>
"Blessed are the meek, for they shall inheiret the Earth.</R> {Mat:5,17 King
James} Oh, hello."
"Wh?" rage, fury, contained for lack of a target. "Yh!"
I shrugged, "I was thinking on joining your church, and saw Grace there, so
I gave her a ride, and she told me about it."
"Yr," turning, "He?"
"No maam," I shook my head seriously, "I never touched her, her skirt never
even brushed my pantleg." Honest, I hadn't so much as felt her breath on my
shirt. Don't know if I can lie to her, but I don't plan on having to.
I handled parents before, none this challenging, but unlike all my friends,
Grace needs me, this. And damn it, all I got to do is squint at the beveled
tops of the fence to see her, pining away in her cloister, like a princess.
I guess that's why I love her.
"Anyway," I got up, snapped The book shut, "I got to go." Jerk off, before
I blow a hose somewere.
Grace {Ff NS}
"All right," not furious, a look I didn't recognise in her face "Now what
happened?"
"Like he said, you weren't there, so he gave me a ride." I crossed my legs,
and they stuck together.
"And he didn't touch your clothes," she sat where he was.
"No," I wondered about that, "I breathed, and he stepped back."
"He is respectfull," she leans in, "His eyes aren't all over you?" A
contraction!
"No," I shake my head, "He looks at my eyes, and face."
"Good," she gets up, "Now it's time to wash up."
"Mother?" she turns, "I think I can wash myself."
"Of course, dear," she dissapears up the stairs, and runs the water.
"Mother!" I follow her up, "I'm not a child, you!"
"It's all right, dear," she turns, "Just to be sure."
"I wasn't alone with him long enough to get all these clothes off!"
"It's tradition," she blinks.
I'm taller than her! "Get out," I push past her, and my skirt gets wet on
the bottom, "I need some privacy!"
"Hh," she steps out, "Of course."
SLAM! "GoD!" I drop my elbows on the sink, and have a good cry. "hH!" I
turn off the water fore it runs over, and pull the plug to let a little
out. Wet sleeved, I strip out of the layers, plug the drain, and start up
the hot.
"Uh!" I lay back, drape my hand over my eyes, let the drops wash the tears
down my ckeeks. "HhHh," I sank lower, watched the steam dance up from the
surface. "Tis a Joy to live simple, 'tis a joy to be free, 'tis a joy to
take a bath, nobody but me." {Joseph Brackett Jr. paraphrazed.} I giggle,
let it soak out, seep into me, sweat down my face, and hair.
Slip down, and roll my head back. "HhHH!" just my nose out, soundless
exhale, silence, near dark on my eyes, just the pink, filtered through my
blood.
"tis a joy to be insvisible, tis a joy to be clean," 'tis a joy to feel your
fingertips, the stiff curls, puffed out by the bulge, split, the bigger
flappy thing at the top. I had grown, learned to pull back with my
fingertips, slipping it through the skin, "OhHm!"
It echoed in the tiled end of the long room, right across to the door. I
shifted my fingers over my mouth, let out the rest of my breath, but it felt
so good, under the warm water. I close my eyes, "snhH!"
Ronald {mf H&H}
Bible study, you know, I actually looked foreward to it. SHE never set down
at the loom, but she couldn't just stand there, and watch us. We kept the
door open, but we could hear her heels, never saw them, but they sounded
like wood.
She even went downstairs, to cook, or whatever, and that gave plenty of
warning time. It was kind of exiting, knowing we were so close to her
sweeping up on her broom, and busting us, but the open door just gave us
more warning.
I'll be as honest with you as I was with her. I made out with other girls,
but I never had a chance before I met her, and every time after, I thought
about her. I loved her, always, but I guess it took a while to recognise.
She was so innocent, and I want to protect that.
She doesn't know how to kiss, never even kissed her dad goodnight, and I can
understand not kissing 'Mother'. Just pressing her lips to mine felt like
something, not the anticipation of slipping my tongue in her mouth, taste
her's but just feeling her breath on my nose, and cheek,
I opened my eyes, set back, "And Jesus," need to get a little more creative,
that won't work again. "Well, hello."
"Towels," she points with two fingers, but lightning bolts don't shoot out.
"Here," I turn back, "Now, where," my fingers trace down the page, and heels
dissapear down the stairs. "Where we?" lean down to kiss her again. Hands
up, on her shoulders, sitting on the bed, eyes closed, sighing through her
nose.
Grhnhnhnh!.. the washing machine spun up, "Nh!" I shifted feet, slipped my
hands up her neck, knuckles brushing undre her hair, rub the curve of her
jaw with my thumbs.
"nhnhn," like she melted, got smaller as the air escaped her nose.
"AHEM," the witch, behind me, shorter, the hem of her skirt wrinkled on the
floor, and shaking. Silently tapping her bare foot. "You think I was never
teen aged?"
Honestly, "No." I snap the book shut, "Why don't you tell us about it?" I
set down, right next to her daughter, and didn't even touch her. "What was
it like?"
"Uh," looking around.
"There was a boy,.." I guessed. She might be wrinckled from scowling so
much, "How old are you?"
"Now youknow it'snot poli," her proper English doesn't hold up when she is
upset.
"Nonsense," I say, "She's fifteen, so you had ta be, what?" I just left it
out there fore her.
"Seventeen," Grace did the math, "Mother, what happened?"
"Hnh," she collapses a little, "Come downstairs, I might as well tell you."
Grace {Fmf NS}
"All right, there was a boy," she leaned down, and slipped her shoes back
on, "His name was Zeke, and he lived on the next farm over." Buckled them
by feel, and sat up. "Huh, he came over, with the rest of the families, an
helped with the barn. It was so hot," she closed her eyes, "and he took off
his shirt, and I felt,"
She looked up, at both of us, on the loveseat. "Impure thoughts?"
"he looked so strong." Little girl voice, eyes unblinking, staring off into
the past.
"So, you..." Ronny is good at helping you talk.
She blinked, swallowed, "He snuck out, away from chores, and talked me into
doing it too. We just kissed, and such, held hands, and walked, and
talked." I never seen her like this.
"And then," her eyes closed again, and I saw a Tear!
"Hhe, SnrK! Hhee touched," she couldn't go on.
"You told him to stop," Ron said for her, "And he, didn't."
"Wuhuh!" she curled up, turned away, but her head flopped, nodded wretchedly.
"Come on," he took my hand, "Let's leave her alone."
I think I floated up him, looking back, at mother, curled up in the bottom
of the chair, not understanding. "What do you mean," looking up at him, "He
didn't stop?"
"HuH!" he drops back, and bounces on the bed. "Now, you know sex is when a
woman gives herself to a man, right? Well, when he don't take no for an
answer, that's called Rape."
"What?" how?
"Come here," he pulled my hand, and I sat down in his lap. "I love you,
Smuit! but some guys out there, all they care about is sex. They're
stronger, and can sometimes talk good, or getcha drunk so you can't fight."
"And mother," still so confused.
"Was Raped," he nodded, "Date raped, actually, but taken against her will
none the less."
"My father?" what's that like, I can't even imagine sex, who knew it was so
complicated?
"I don't think he's your biological father," he shakes his head, "Looks
nothin like you, got to be a Saint, or Eunic, or something by now." His
hand on my cheek, "Those are questions for your mother, when she's ready,
but I'm here now, and I don't wanna talk about it no more."
"Okay," me neither.
His lips felt so warm, hand so strong on my shoulder, and the last I could
think about it was that he would never let that happen to me.
{All right guys, I could end it there, but if I don't come through with your
fukkin catharsis, I'll probably get mailbombed. Well, actually any feedback
would be nice at this point, and (Looks up)?}
Ronaldo {Mf Teen Virg}
"Happy birthday," I had to borrrow papi's truck, and drop it in 4x to get up
here, but it was worth it. POP! not even dark yet, good view of the
Potomac, and the hazy grey blob of the capital.
"Smuit!" we lay back on the windsheild, and she settled her hair on my arm.
Some other sounds we got no letters for cause they take four lips to say.
Not rushing anything, we got all night.
"Hnh!" her hand slips up my chest, rippling the tee shirt, over my neck, and
the prickles of stubble on my cheek. She likes them, does four laps with
her fingertips. I slip my hand down from her shoulder.
The bra strap slides up between the heels of my hand, then splits, pulled
tight over the gentle swell, going softer under the weight of my hand,
bulging with gentle pressure from my fingers.
"Uhn!" I jumped, and she smiled into my lips as something else went off
close enough to hear. Heart already pounding out of control, I wanted to
jump up, on top of her, tear her clothes off.
In the heat, we talked her down to a still modest below knee lenth skirt,
short sleeves, and socks up past the hem. I could still smell her sweat,
but it ain't no warmer in the cab. "Hh," I catch my breath, "Come on," it's
not as sunny in there, we leave the doors open.
Technicly private property, I hiked up her once, took all day, and nobody
else drove it for decades, at least. "HhHmH!" I slipped the straps of the
dress down, right away, reached back, and around with both hands.
"Nhu!" she grinned into my lips, and I smiled back, slipping my hands back
around her ribs. She giggles, with a little tickle, and they wiggle into my
hands. "IhnhnHN!"
"Hah!" 28b's, the softest most beautifull things I have ever held. They'd
fill out, to feed our children, I look up at her smile, eyes. "I love you."
"I love you to!" she gets that dirty grin, and shoves her hands between my
legs.
"Uh!" she squeezed real hard, and my balls was already starting to ache, but
I guess she was cooped up to long. Yeah, we got all night, but the same
time, I don't wanna throw a rod, or something. I stripped the belt, and
slipped my hand across our laps, her skirts up her leg.
She felt so sweaty, even before I got there, and her underpants were more
than damp. "Mhn," she bit her lip, and shifted in her seat. I could feel
the little puff, flatten as she scooted back, spreading her legs.
Now, I been practicing, slipped my pointer, and ring finger up, pulling the
silky fabric taut, and slipping it over her skin with the tip of my middle
finger. "MnH!" she switched, and sucked her lip back in. "nh!"
I chuckled, and slipped my other hand around, down the buttons of her
blouse. "Hn nh hN!" her chest rolled under the stiff cotton, spreading open
so slowly, and I slipped it out from under my wrist, under her skirt.
"HnhnH!"
She shakes, not even comming yet, but say it's like twitches of pleasure all
through her. I felt like a ventriloquist, pull the wire, "Nht!" Her eyes
opened, looked over, smiled sweetly. "HhHhuh!" she blinks.
So beautifull, and inocent, learning, feeling with no way to hide it. So
honest, sincere, couldn't be nothing wrong with it. I kiss her some more,
but slip her skirts up, her belly, hell even her chest, and move over to her.
Already out, and ready, she holds it for me while I look down, try to,
"OhH!" So pretty, the damp hairs pressed out, flat, waving, and her lips,
the little flap sticking out, red, and warm with blood.
"HhH," I swallow, push her hands away, stop her insistant pulling, catch my
breath. "Hh huhhu!" So close, nearly blew it, still twitching, bouncing
between us with my pulse. Relaxing my buthole, I scoot her foreward by the
hips, and slowly slide back.
"You ready?" I hold my breath, she nodds. "Hyou sure?"
"Please," she looks up, right in my eyes, "Please fuck me."
"NhnhN!" I miss, catch my hips on her thighs, pull back, and this time aim
carefully.
"nT!" my eyes open, and the light surrounds us, tinting the glass around the
cabin a burnt red, the fireworks are closer together. Yeah, I heard a
"Pop", but it was after.
I felt it, the resistance, slowly pushing, then giving. Her, tight, hot
around me, "HhihihH!" her sucking in a raged breath, like a sob, the look on
her face, and utter confusion at it.
"Hahn!" she pulled me, hands tight on my sides, pressing my hips hard into
her thighs, "anH!"
"Uh," I pulled back, slipped her leg out with my hand, and she picked the
other one up over the dash for me. "Nhn!"
"HihH!" her face did, that again, and a tear popped out, but she kept pulling
me, wrapped her leg around my back, pushed with the other one to swing her
legs wider, hips higher, deeper around me. "NhnhHhN!" she shook, arm
swinging back to slap my seat, other hand clutching her skirt, "Ghrd," eyes,
and teeth tight, "YhrhH!"
I pulled back, and pushed in again, and again, bumping her but up on the
seat, shaking my pants down behind me, pushing into her faster, and faster,
and "NHhuhuhuhuh!" I never got off like that before, I just held it in,
deep as I can get, and felt it twitch out, splash around my head, pulled all
the way out of it's skin.
"Nh!" her fingers twitched between us, rolling her nuckles in my beard, and
I softened in her. Even as my heart strated idyling down, I felt her
desperate inching twitch faster, and faster. I scooted back, kissed her,
and slipped my hand back between her legs.
"Hhih!" she drolled, eyes popping open to look at mine, then soften, close
as her mouth fell open under mine. I spread my fingers, slipped the longest
down, to feel back, where I been. "nh," she melts, in my mouth, and in my
hand, around my finger, deep as I can reach into her.
"Hh HhH HhH!" faster, my fingers slip on her lips, and the side of my hand,
pushing the soft warm hairy ridge, the wet slopping sound I can't spell.
"HnmM,?" her lip pops out, "Hhhhhh."
Lights flash behind me, and I open my eyes, p, pp, pPtptptP! "HhnN!" I
feel her twitch inside, like she always said, squeezing my finger, rippling
up, and down it.
Grace {FM NS}
We made love again in the sleeping bags after the fireworks. "That was
wonderfull," I petted his chest, the few short curls, especially around his
nipples, "I never felt, one like that before, I could feel your life," still
do, "Inside me."
"Yeah," he rolled my head on his arm, kissed my head, "I do love you, not
just saying that."
"I know," I felt it, "You're so gentle, and kind to me, I know you won't
never hurt me."
"Did it hurt?" I looked up, to the concern on his face.
"A little," back down, "But I felt the joy more, I felt free."
"Good," he kissed me, "I'm glad."
Ron {MF NS}
I drove her home, held her hand when it was safe, but downhill, it's tricky
not hitting this tree, or rolling off that cliff. Not really rocky, or
shear, but too steep to roll down sideways, and survive.
Anyway, it was hairy, but I got us down in one peice. On the road back to
town, I slipped my hand over to her's, in her lap. She grinned guiltily,
and slipped it up to the top of her pants.
She changed, they were too loose to see any of her body under it, the way I
do. I grinned, and slipped my fingertips over her panties. She just
sighed, smiled, closed her eyes, and rolled her hips in the seat.
She came around my fingers, two this time, and I marvaled at the feeling
while I tried to keep it in the lane, and keep my eyes out for anyone still
out tonight. Pp! someone's got a bottle rocket left, and not a screamer.
I roll up in front of her house, kiss her across the seat, then, "Come
here," through the open window. Looking up, I see a light on, Her
silloette, and feel her slip away.
Her hand on my arm, pulling it out, looking back, smiling, her hair shining,
almost blonde, her shadow, shrinking, swinging, and a flash from the mirror.
.
News {A Solo}
And in local news, a sixteen year old went on a rampage last night, killed
23 people, all in their cars, police say there are signs that several, if
not all were intoxicated, and driving drink.
Due to his age, his identity is being witheld, but it has been made clear
that he was a liscenced driver, with no alcohol or drugs in his system, and
he was possibly triggered by a related vehicular homocide.
Esther Hoag-Johnson: Witness.
"Whuh!" sobbing, "she was jus commin home," ragged gasp, "and this car come
up th' street. I swer, he was drinkin," a whisp of hair twists, ragged from
behind her ear, a single white strand through the woody brown, and her Eye
bulges, blinks spasticly.
"Nhnhnh!" she falls to her knees, "Why?" face muffled in her hands,
"Whymylittlegirl?"