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 Sun and Sea 24 A James Gang Story by Mike C

   Feedback : mikec (at) nspace.net

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   "What's happening?" I ask, "You two had a fight?" I said as we came out
on deck after the shower.

   "Hazel got grossed out...!" Amanda grinned from the Entertainment
center.

   "She...  she just tore its head off!" Hazel, over at the far railing
exclaimed, and mimed a ripping tearing action with her hands.

   "It's the quickest way to put the lobsters out of their misery," Said a
very unrepentant Mandie, "I didn't want to interrupt what those guys were
doing by going down for a chopper." She leaned up to me, "Was it good baby?
There was a lot of happy noises, if you know what I mean!" She clamped her
gore-coated hands around my neck and licked my lips.  "Mmmm, yummy!"

   "If you'll excuse me," I ducked under her arms, "Parfum de Ichor doesn't
go well on me.  And there's only half a tank of water left!"

   I went to join Hazel.  "Haze, she's normally not as bad as this!"

   "No...  I've SEEN worse, like when my brothers and cousins tried to
scare me as kids, or the Tiger yesterday; but when Amanda does it, it's
so...  so unreal!  I can't get over how innocent she appears..."

   "But inside, beats a heart of pure evil," Sherri sat next to her, "We
are well acquainted with that!"

   "Hah, but evil has no heart!" Amanda turned to rebuke her, while she was
pulling the thorax away from the tail muscle and then halving it down the
middle with her hands, as lobster bits dripped on the deck.  "So you have
repudiated yourself!"

   "Yeah, while you are quite heartless in the metaphorical sense!" Sherri
yelled back, "Anatomically, it is your brain which houses your evilness!"

   "So why did you call it my heart, then?" Amanda gestured and green and
yellow blobs rained down on us.

   "Because your..." Sherri started and I quickly muzzled her.

   "Enough now...  Can we get some water boiling inside before we have to
use it all for cleaning up?"

   "I'll go," Brenda said, "I don't like what we're being bombarded with."

   "Yeah, fine then..." Sherri looked around, "Where're the sea urchins?"

   "I put them in the live bait box," Hazel said, "You know you can only
keep them until we leave, then we have to let them go..."

   "Why?  If..." Sherri asked, then with a twinkle in her eyes, "Before I
continue, may I?" She held Hazel's face and delivered a kiss.  As it
deepened, their arms slipped around each other and they eased down to the
loafer seat.

   "Let me help you," I offered to Amanda, "They may be a while."

   "I can tell," She sighed, "Yet another road kill on the highway of
love!"

   "Who are you talking about?"

   "Me, of course!  You heartless brute who won't even try to console me in
my darkest hour!"

   I gave her a kiss, "There, that should hold you!  But you know, if
they're gonna be an hour, I'm definitely gonna start eating without them!"
I grabbed the last intact lobster and started dismembering it.  "How 'bout
we grill this one and parboil the others, then we can add a cream sauce,
like a Thermador, or add some wine, like Newburg..."

   "You sure you want to wait that long before you eat them?  But yeah, I
can make some sashimi from the first two lobsters then."

   "Good idea, by the time we're finished that, the one on the grill should
be ready."

   "OK, and we can save the shells and head - we can render the fat out
like Gary does on the teppan..." She left to finish her lobsters in the
cabin with Brenda.

   I started the meat on the BBQ and the two were still lazily squirming on
each other.

   "You're a bad girl!" Hazel sighed in Sherri's arms.  "But you're a GOOD
kisser!"

   "How can I be both Good and Bad at the same time?" Smiled Sherri.

   "You're bad to kiss me..." Hazel thought about it, "I have to ask
Amanda."

   "Ask me what?" She stuck her head out.

   "Are you unhappy about me kissing Sherri?"

   "No...  I'm only unhappy that she has a shit-eating grin on her face and
I don't."

   "So it's OK then?"

   "Yes, but ONLY with people we trust implicitly, alright?"

   "Yeah - that's everyone here on the boat, right?"

   "Yes." Amanda nodded.

   "I'm glad..." Hazel turned to Sherry, "You're STILL a bad girl for
making me want to do nasty things..." She sighed and added a kiss, "You
said you had some reason for doing that?"

   "Er, yes," Sherri smiled, "I was afraid I won't get a chance after I do
this..." She unwound herself and went over the live bait tank.  Hazel
watched intently as Sherri selected a soccer-ball sized sea urchin and took
it over to the cutting board.

   "She...  Ugh!" Hazel flinched as Sherri picked up the chefs knife. 
"WHAT is she doing?"

   "If I'm not mistaken, Sherri's gonna make us Uni sashimi - raw sea
urchin." Amanda said, coming back up with her langoustine and soy sauce
dip.

   "She's going to EAT them?" Hazel's eyes went wide, and shuddered as the
knife went Whack!  over at Sherri's.  "I-I thought she just w-wanted to
keep them as a p-pet!"

   "No, you'll find Sherri and Amanda equally, er...  pragmatic." Brenda
commented as she brought up salad and another plate of raw lobster.

   "The best time for Uni is just before full moon, which I believe is in 3
days." Sherri continued unabated, "Okay, the spines are off, now the tricky
bit." She grabbed the buzz-cut urchin, now about the size of a soft-ball,
and ran her knife around, just above the middle.  With a deft twist, the
entire top came off, taking the brain stem with it.  Inside were six lobes
of bright yellow flesh.

   "Behold, the golden food of the gods." With the knife tip she lifted
each thumb sized morsel out, rinsed it under the tap and offered to us.

   "Exquisite..." I sighed.  The meat was smooth, creamy and delightfully
oceany, with the sharp tang of salt.  It was like a summer day on a
deserted island, waves washing at your feet, birds circling, dolphins
cavorting - all in one bite.

   "Oh, yessss..." Mandie swayed, enthralled, "So, so, SO good!  Mmmm,
forget sex, this is the real deal!"

   "That is A-fucking-mazing!  But I STILL want sex..."

   "Well, what do you think Hazel?"

   "I sincerely hope sex is better than this." Hazel looked undecided
whether to spit it out or wait for her stomach to do it for her.

   "Well at least you know you've tried it..." Sherri smiled, "And believe
me, the taste WILL grow on you!"

   "I'll take your word for it," Hazel replied, "Is this a good time for me
to volunteer and watch the food?"

   "Wait, you have to try this one too!" Brenda held out the raw lobster.
"Take a piece and dip it in the sauce..."

   "Mmm, this isn't bad!" Hazel said, "The hot sauce is really good...  And
it's just crayfish?  Raw?"

   "Yep," Brenda smiled, as Hazel took another piece, "You're doing well!
One step closer to Sashimi Breath!"

   "What does that mean?"

   "It means that you can't give a blow job until you master the art of
eating sashimi first!"

   "Really?"

   "It'll certainly get you used to the taste!"

   "Uhmmm, can I try the sea urchin again?"

   Sherri and Amanda worked on the urchins as we sat back with our sashimi,
nursing Goombay and OJ Punches and waiting for the lobsters to cook.  They
returned with more of the amazing morsels, along with a plate.

   "Leftover eggs from breakfast," Sherri explained, "But Deviled with Uni
and lemon juice.  Its official name is Tomago Neri - quail's egg is
normally used, but any egg will minimize the 'fishiness' so it lets you
concentrate on the taste..."

   Hazel savored it, "Not bad, I can get used to this..." I tried one or
two.  Although losing a lot of the impact, the creaminess of the Uni and
the egg yolk went together well, and could perhaps ease the unprepared
palate into the flavor without total systemic overload.

   The remainder of the lunch was a great success; the lobster meat
disappeared quickly and we didn't wait for anything fancy, nor did we need
to: the tender morsels of meat were succulent and delicious all on its own.
We had left the head and shells 'stewing' over a cookie sheet on the BBQ
and the resulting distillation went marvelously with bread.
We started cleaning up soon after, and after giving lobsters and urchin

their burial at sea, headed back.  We were tied up within ten minutes.

   "Where'd everyone go?"

   "It's lunch time - so they're up in the Main House."

   We bumped into Jo-An when we went to wash up.  He was just finishing
with his class of five beginner divers.

   "Good dive?" He asked.

   "Yeah, we did Tarpon Point.  Perfect conditions, great visibility."
Hazel answered, "Where's Eva?  She should be waiting here."

   "Zack took her and Donnie for a spin in the new boat," Jo-An looked at
Mandie, "He says he'll just take them to the town, pick up the food and be
back here by two, three latest."

   "We're just gonna go into town - we'll see him there then!"

   "You guys go ahead, I've got a few calls to make and then I need to talk
the Bentels - I'll be here when you return." Brenda said, and excused
herself.

   We helped Hazel get the air tanks in the recharger and, after a quick
wash and change, we were back at Hazel's place.  She was waiting with a
golf cart and took us down the "King's Highway", a rutted dirt track with
barely clearance for our cart.

   "Did James tell you I drove one just like this in Brookhaven?" Amanda
asked.

   "But did James tell you need a valid Driver's License to do that here?"
Smiled Hazel.

   "Pooh, I drive better than 90% of the people, even without a license!"

   "I know sweetie, but if you get caught, they will fine the resort."
Hazel said, "So you have to think of THEM!"

   "Jeez, you guys take all the fun out of being illegal!"

   The track widened slightly as we entered the 'town', which consisted of
about 40 houses and buildings along the single 'Highway' with paths leading
away on either side.  All the houses were painted with bright colors and
many sported white picket fences.

   "Wait, wait, stop!" Amanda cried.  We lurched to a stop and she bolted
off, with Sherri in close pursuit.

   They had charged across to a small garage with the sign, "Ponce de León
- Auto Rental".  Despite the moniker, the only vehicles evident were golf
carts and little Vespa and Honda mopeds, which looked at least 10 years
old, maybe even older than the girls.  They were looking back at us
expectantly.

   "Sorry guys," Hazel said, "You need Licenses!"

   "Hey, I got my Light Aircraft Pilot's License!" Amanda waved it,
discreetly covering the part stating, "Not Valid Unless Accompanied by
Government Photo ID."

   "You make mistake!  Dey no' planes!" A young black man came up, grinning
and shaking his head of shocking yellow hair.  "C'uponyo, Miz Charl', you
com f' montel mon?  Pon-Pon 'e be yo' mon!" He struck a pose and grinned at
Hazel.

   "This is Pon-Pon, he thinks he's Casanova, but essentially harmless..."
Hazel introduced us, and, without breaking stride, continued, "Pon-Pon, mi
man 'e sez mout'amassy Pon-Pon 'e be causin' ja' vexashun, Pon-Pon get
baxsidin 'e no siddown for week!  Seen?" She hugged my arm and grinned
nastily.

   Pon-Pon backed up and held up his hands.  "Seen!  Pon-Pon no' be knowin'
likkle jubbe she yo' womon.  Pon-Pon no tell 'e feelings."

   "Whoa, what're you two saying?!!" Amanda stared at Hazel and the man,
"That is so WICKED!"

   "Did I just become your boyfriend?" I murmured.

   "I thought it happened last night." Hazel blushed, but squeezed my bicep
to her breast.  "Pon-Pon, my friends here want to rent your bikes."

   "You know I cannot rent without a License!" Pon-Pon spread his hands
helplessly.  "And NOT Pilot license.  Get me in trouble!"

   "Hey Eva!" Amanda shouted as she came out of a small store.  "We're
trying to rent a couple of bikes, can you help?  We, er, seemed to have
left our Drivers licenses behind."

   "What happened to all the patois speech?" Sherri asked.

   "He only does it to impress the tourists, and to make passes at the
girls." Hazel smiled, "But he's right, his business and the Resort will be
held responsible for any traffic infractions on the Islands." Eva nodded in
agreement.

   "Pon-Pon say, 'Miz Hazel, go fin' uncl' Choo-Choo, 'e fixer-upper!' "
Pon-Pon nodded sagely.

   "That's an idea," Eva laughed, "Uncl' Choo-Choo 'e mak awight f'r libble
Missies!"

   "Damn, how come everyone can speak this cool language except me?" Amanda
mourned.

   "Okay," Sighed Hazel, "I guess I could...  Eva, can you get the girls
some makeup and make sure they, er, look their age?  Then come meet us at
Uncle Choo-Choo's?"

   Eva, with a wide grin, took the girls into the store she just came out
of.

   Hazel, with her arm still in mine walked me to the other side of town.

   "Who is this Uncle Choo-Choo everyone seems to be so worried about?"

   "I'm the only one worried..." Hazel sighed, "Remember Jo-An?  Well Uncle
Choo-Choo's his father; The Right Honourable Archibald Charles, Esquire.  A
more boring self-absorbed person you will not find anywhere.  So naturally
he is Her Majesty's Government's sole Representative in our little town. 
You cannot do anything unless he gives permission..."

   She steered me to a narrow store front, "But here, this is Reef Relief -
you wanted to talk to them, didn't you?  I have to pick something up, then
I'll come back to get you." She turned to go, then came back and kissed me,
"How come you stopped trying to kiss me?"

   "I'm your boyfriend now, so kissing is not required." I said.

   "You think so?" She wraped her arm around my neck and held my head down
for a long warm kiss.  "That's three kisses for you, and two for me! 
Likkle mo', boyfriend!" She grinned as she walked away.

   I went through the next twenty minutes in a dazed state of blissfulness
and found myself back out in the street, with a thick stack of brochures in
one hand and the other held firmly around my new girlfriend's waist.

   "What did you get?" I asked her.

   "A little Official grease." She smiled, "Both he and my father like
Johnny Walker Black, so I can pretend this is a present from Dad.  That way
Uncle can take it without looking like it's a bribe." We went up to a small
white building.  Under a bronze plaque stating "Government House", the
girls were already waiting for us.

   "Oh my...  Oh MY!" Hazel breathed.

   The girls had applied blush and pearlescent lip gloss with minimal
mascara and lilac eyeshadow - they looked like fresh young debutantes at
the Spring cotillion.  Or very expensive hookers.

   "They seemed to know what to do already..." Eva laughed.

   "Oh, we just know how to look the part!" Laughed Sherri.  "Give the
people what they expect!"

   "Wow, they are so confident!" Hazel said, "I have so much to learn from
them!" She turn to me, "Can I ask you and Eva to wait here?  For this we do
not need witnesses...  And girls, please do not try to get away with
anything but 17!"

   "Damn, I thought I could get my clubbing ID at the same time!"

   "Shit, girl, you can't handle alcohol!" Sherri laughed, "One drink and
you'll be under the table getting boned by every Joe!"

   "What about you..."

   "Stop it, both of you!  Act your supposed age!" Hazel glared.

   "Whoa, tough Mama!" Mandie stuck her tongue out.

   "Okay, no more fooling around, now move!" Hazel marched them inside.

   "Thank you Eva for helping out."

   "Don't thank me!" She laughed, "First time I've seen Hazel do something
so...  so audacious!  You've had an unbelievable effect on her!" She shook
her head, "Damn, I didn't see it in her either!"

   "We're constantly being amazed by her," I smiled, "She took us to see
the Manta Rays this morning."

   "Ah, yes, a most unforgettable sight." She sighed, "Donnie said they
found one like it about fifteen years ago, and news of it went all over the
Islands, but within 3 months, the Mantas had to abandon it - there was no
more security with boats moving in and out, and the inevitable idiot
deciding to 'explore' the cave.  Worst was the overfeeding which destroyed
the water quality and brought the sharks in." She looked at me, "I want
this one to last much longer than that.  Do you understand?"

   "Yeah, we're not going to do anything to disrupt the Mantas.  They're
just too majestic to be trivialed with!"

   "I'm glad.  This is more home to me now than Canada, and it breaks my
heart to see paradise taken apart island by island just so some boatload of
tourists can cruise by, drop trash in the water and claim they've been
here."

   "It's important that we protect this too," I nodded, "We're just 200
miles from Florida but the difference is like night and day - here it's
pure, clean, uncomplicated and NICE!  And we've met some of the nicest
people here.  We won't do anything to screw that up!" I smiled at Eva, "And
talking about nice people, where's Donnie?"

   "He's gone off to visit his cousins." She smiled, tossing her hair, "The
Tosh family owns every drinking establishment in this town." She pointed,
"Starting with Aunt Em's Original Goombay Smash, to Uncle Bern's Bar, to
the latest, the Rooster's Roost, up on the hill there.  So he has a lot of
visiting, and drinking to do!"

   "And Zack's helping you with the food?"

   "Yeah, he's down at the Government Docks, supervising the loading of the
Carver...  I better give him a hand." Eva gave me a smile, "See you
later... and take good care of Hazel!"

   "I will..." I said to her back as she went down the hill to the bay.

   I wandered along the main street.  Just past the one wicket Post Office
and the Batelco office was a small Museum with artifacts from the end of
the Civil War, when Confederate land owners fled to these islands with
their families and slaves.  The rest of the street was taken up with four
churches of various denominations, Fishing Charter outfits, a half dozen
souvenir shops, tackle and hardware stores and a cute little garden with
busts of famous politicians.  Hazel's uncle Archibald was there too,
looking very severe and...  bureaucratic.

   At Garmon's Take-Away, where the road turned into a pier, across from a
self-proclaimed "Likkor Store", I bought a meal of curried goat on pita
bread and was eating that when they came back out.

   "Look!  LOOK!" Grinned Amanda, "I am fucking LEGAL!" She waved her newly
laminated photo-ID in my face.  "And I can FUCK legally too!  How 'bout
that?"

   "No, it just means anyone can fuck you and not worry about jail!"
Corrected Sherri.

   "So FUCK YOU too, sister!"

   "Yep - and you don't have to go to jail afterwards either!" Grinned
Sherri.

   "So uncle Archibald liked the 'present?' " I asked Hazel.

   "Yeah, but mostly he was thankful I got Jo-An the job." She shrugged,
"It went pretty much the way I expected it." She turned to the girls, "Are
we going to stare at your gorgeous pictures all day or are we getting
motorcycles?"

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   (C) Copyright 2001-2009.  MikeC. All Rights Reserved. All Reproduction
for fee or profit forbidden.

   Copies of this and other stories can be downloaded from:
<http://www.asstr.org/files/Authors/MikeC/JAMES/Sun&Sea/>
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