A man walks into a bar, notices a very large jar on the counter, and 
  sees that it's filled to the brim with $10 bills. He guesses there must 
  be at least ten thousand dollars in it. He approaches the bartender and 
  asks, "What's with the money in the jar?"
 
  "Well..., you pay $10, and if you pass three tests, you get all the 
  money in the jar and the keys to a brand new Lexus"
 
  The man certainly isn't going to pass this up, so he asks, "What are the 
  three tests?"
 
  "You gotta pay first," says the bartender, "those are the rules."
 
  So, after thinking it over a while, the man gives the bartender $10 
  which he stuffs into the jar.
 
  "Okay," says the bartender, "here's what you need to do:
 
  First - You have to drink a whole quart of tequila, in 60 seconds or 
  less, and you can't make a face while doing it."
 
 
 
  "Second - There's a pit bull chained in
  the back with a bad tooth. You have to remove that tooth with your bare 
  hands."
 
 
  "Third - There's a 90-year old lady upstairs who's never had sex. You
  have to take care of that problem."
 
 
 
 
  The man is stunned! "I know I paid my $10 -- but I'm not an idiot! I 
  won't do it! You'd have to be nuts to drink a quart
  of tequila and then do all those other things!"
 
  "Your call," says the bartender, "but,
  your money stays where it is."
 
  As time goes on, the man has a few
  more drinks and finally says, "Where's the damn tequila?!"
 
  He grabs the bottle with both hands and drinks it as fast as he can. 
  Tears stream down both cheeks -- but he doesn't make a face -- and he 
  drinks it in 58 seconds!

  Next, he staggers out the back door where he sees the pit bull chained 
  to a pole. Soon, the people inside the bar hear loud growling, 
  screaming, and sounds of a terrible fight -- then nothing but silence!
 
  Just when they think that the man surely must be dead, he staggers back 
  into the bar. His clothes are ripped to shreds and he's bleeding from 
  bites and gashes all over his body. He drunkenly says, "Now..., where's 
  that old woman with the bad tooth?"