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 Once Upon a Time Part 3 - One More Try (Comfortably Dumb)

   Part 1 of 2 If you're new to the saga - here's what you need to know...

   My name is Joel Eastin, and for whatever reason (current guess is a
brain tumor) I have been given the gift of revisiting past experiences
through the songs of my youth.  It works like this; I hear a song that
triggers the event, and I am transported to that moment in time.  Once
there, I can fast forward and rewind my vision, skipping over the boring
parts - or (much more often) rewinding to catch the good parts over and
over again.  While I have been tempted to seek the reason for this gift, it
is not as if I can walk into the doctors office and tell them about this -
can I?  "Hey Doc, I have been time travelling in my head, and watching
young me get into all sorts of crazy situations, what should I do?" Talk
about a one way trip to the crazy house!

   Sometimes, when things are a bit out of sorts at the old homestead, I
will actively try to trigger an event.  If the old lady is on my case, I
may try to remember a girl from the past - or if the kids are harshing my
gig, I want to look back to when I was an irresponsible kid myself.  In
this case, I admit it, I was looking for an escape.  I had just found out
that an old buddy had finally split up with his wife, and to be fair - it
was just a matter of time.  Gary McBocks had been a buddy of mine since
sophomore year, although I'd met his brother Steve during freshman
orientation, and he'd never been good at addressing his feelings -
preferring to leave it to the other party to decide how to proceed.  I
recalled the number of times that he would simply vanish from the skin of
this world, only to show up later in an entirely new life.  We lost track
of each other for a few years shortly after I moved to Dallas, and
reconnected on social media where I found out he had been working in the
desert, for the last few years.  Afghanistan is great for your bank
account, but it is hard on a wife and child, so I was saddened but not
surprised when his wife Heidi posted about her new marital status on
Facebook.

   Now to be honest, I was always weirded out that the two of them ended up
together.  I had pulled my own disappearing act after graduation - leaving
to join the military and find a career to support my own young family.  It
was only after I got out and returned home that I found out they were
married.  I had stopped by the McBocks' residence to see if either of the
brothers were still around, and Heidi answered the door.  Turned out she
was there to pick up her and Gary's daughter - my how six years away brings
a lot of surprises!  I'm not sure of a tune that would bring back the
memories of the time I spent with her and her sister, but if it turns up -
that'll be a good memory.

   So there I was, reminiscing about Gary's various tactics for passively
dumping some chick, when I recalled my favorite of them - Lennie.  In
addition to being probably the coolest chick that my buddy had hooked up
with, she and her sisters had become my neighbors the summer before senior
year and that had been an awesome summer!  I tried to think of a song that
reminded me of her, and failed miserably at it.  So, I went trolling for
something to get the job done - I have never been above seeking assistance
from others to meet my goals.  Alone in my office, I punched up YouTube and
began searching for 90's songs - looking for something that would shoot me
back to the right place and time.  This is always dangerous for someone
with my affliction - as I never know when something might trigger.  In
search of the right song, I was just as likely to stumble onto one that put
me back in elementary school - and while most of my memories are pleasant,
some are too much to handle.  I found a playlist promising the best summer
songs of the 90's, and took the plunge blindly - hoping that the maker of
the list was not a complaint rock fan.  The last thing I needed was a dose
of The Tragically Hip - they're not bad, but certainly not poppy enough for
the memory I desired.

   As the first strains of Everclear's 'Santa Monica' blared from my office
speakers, I knew I'd gotten a good list.  I listened to them and Sugar
Ray's 'Fly' before the list took a twist and played 'Steal my Sunshine' by
Len.  I was enjoying the musical trip down memory lane, but that wasn't the
goal - I wanted to go there.  For that something needed to click into
place, and I still wasn't sure how to do that.  Even trying to return to
memories I have already traveled to was not certain - so I was firing
blindly in hopes of hitting my target.  When the song changed, it wasn't a
instantaneous jump.  I had to ease into it as I didn't remember the tune at
all, but gradually my surroundings changed.  There wasn't enough detail to
know if I was headed to where I intended, but I was going somewhere - or
somewhen I guess you'd say...

   Seventeen year old Joel Eastin was relaxing on his bed, it appeared to
be early afternoon, and the sight of the unpacked boxes lying everywhere
indicated that I was at least in the vicinity of where I'd desired.  His/my
little brother George was pawing through the boxes and asking for this and
that from each.  He opened another box and pulled an empty Captain Morgan
bottle from inside, "Jesus, there's four of these in here, did you drink it
all?" he asked.  The sight of the bottle turned my stomach twenty-six years
later.  I would never drink spiced rum again if I could get away with it,
and the look on young Joel's face told me he was suffering much worse than
I.  "You can have those if you want, I'd rather not see them again any time
soon." Joel said.  George took the box to his room and returned to continue
his scavenging, perusing the objects his brother had collected during his
misspent summer on his own.  I vividly recall the few months that I'd
shared that apartment with Martin, and many memories were made there as
well, but the beckoning school year had lead to a cease-fire with the
folks, so back home I went.

   Before George could barter for more trinkets, the phone rang and he
answered it on Joel's extension.  He listened for a moment before tossing
the cordless phone to Joel, "It's for you." I watched as Joel answered, and
smiled when he said "Sure, no problem - I'll be leaving shortly but Georgie
is here if ya'll need anything.  Do me a favor and go easy on him OK?" he
grinned as he disconnected the call.  "Alright little bro, you are in for a
treat this afternoon!  That was Lennie, she and her sisters are gonna come
over to swim in the pool.  Try not to bother them, but make sure you take a
look every once in awhile!" George smiled nervously.  At fourteen, he was a
bit of a late bloomer in young Joel's opinion, but older me knew he turned
out well enough by the time he graduated.

   I watched as Joel prepared to leave for work, not really much to it -
grab the shirt and hat and you -(TM)re done.  He grabbed his keys off the
dresser and made his way to the kitchen for a drink before he split.  As he
stood in front of the sink, he could first hear, then see Lennie and her
sisters entering the backyard.  Joel watched as her younger sister Jennifer
dropped her crap on a chaise lounge and dove in without a thought.  Behind
her, Lennie's older sister Kim arranged her towel and removed her t-shirt
before lying down to catch some sun.  Kim (she'd always hated that people
called her Kimmy - so I never did it) was petite, with brown shoulder
length hair - not unattractive, just not able to compete with Lennie.  She
was wearing some kind of filmy cover-up, and that was pretty awesome - but
when she removed it to display the bikini underneath, young me almost died
of envy.  Joel exited the back of the house, he was just socially aware
enough to realize it would be poor form to leave without saying anything.
"OK ladies, I have got to get to work.  Y'all have fun, but not too much if
you please - my kid brother is inside." Kim laughed, "so no nude sunbathing
then?" she pouted.  Joel was amused by the thought, "Do what you like, but
try not to cause a seizure in there, OK?  Not sure how I'd explain that to
the parents."

   I hit the fast forward to skip what I'm sure was a very boring shift in
the kitchen at work.  I have many great memories of that restaurant, but it
wasn't the goal of this trip.  I slowed down when I saw myself entering the
Village Inn, which was our current favorite hangout spot.  Most of the day
the place was filled with old folks who got together to enjoy their senior
discount and relive their glory days.  But once the sun went down, the
younger crowd moved in and plotted how to formulate what would someday
become their very own glory days.  Joel was just sitting down when I joined
the scene, Gary and Lennie were at one end of the table and several others
were gathered around the other - planning something.  Joel immediately
engaged his buddy -(TM)s girl "So, did you and your sisters kill my brother
this afternoon?" She shook her head, "No, but I think he got an eyeful of
Kimmy on more than one occasion.  She was naked before you hit the end of
your driveway!" Joel laughed at that, imagining Georgie watching from the
windows and abusing himself in who knows how many ways.  "So, no naked
action from yourself, eh?  You chicken or something?" At that, Gary stood
and thumped his chest, "Hey man, quit flirting with my girl!  Don't make me
have to kick your ass!" The folks at the table laughed and waited for
Joel's reply, this was a game the two of them played frequently - and it
always ended in one of them getting slammed pretty good.

   Before Joel could respond, Lennie looked up at her boyfriend "Enough of
that Gary, quit being a shithead.  I am yours by choice, and who knows? 
Perhaps I made the wrong decision, maybe Joel should flirt a little more?"
Joel was taken aback, but he decided to calm things down by heading up to
order some food since he wasn't feeling so good.  On his way past, Lennie
smacked him on the ass and announced that everything felt good back there -
continuing to egg Gary on, to the delight of the group.  When he returned,
Chuck Moon, who had been forming the weekend battle plans announced that
the forecast called for heavy storms to the north - which would bring good
surf by Saturday morning.  The plan was to sleep on the beach Saturday
night, to have the most time available to enjoy the waves.  For a moment, I
thought I knew exactly which memory this was - the Hell Swell, but that
hadn't happened until 1991 so I was confused.  Joel fixed that a moment
later, when he announced that they could sleep on the beach if they wanted
- but they'd miss the party.

   "As we speak, my parents are en route to St.  Augustine to meet up with
some old friends.  They are not going to be back until late on Sunday;
which gives me tomorrow to prepare, Saturday to party, and Sunday to clean
up after you pigs.  So what I propose is this, you guys go surf on
Saturday, and by the time you get back - I will have the party in full
swing!" After some discussion, the matter was decided - and the
anticipation of a blow out party was more than enough to ease the pain of
missing good surf.  I watched as younger me entertained the group with an
improvised story about a bunny on an acid trip.  I had always had a flair
for telling stories, but that skill diminished with age - so it was fun to
listen as Joel weaved in suggestions from his audience as he went.  The
night ended rather uneventfully, and soon it was time to fast forward or
simply watch myself sleep - it was an easy decision for me.

   Friday morning began rather simply, with Joel explaining to George about
his role in that evenings festivities.  "You can have one buddy over for
the evening, assuming that his parents don't want to speak to mom or dad,
sound good?" George agreed, and made a quick call to his chosen plus one
before returning for the rest of the ground rules.  "Your only rule is that
you never talk about what happens to anyone - ever.  It also applies to
your friend, if I do not feel he is trustworthy then both of you will be
confined to your room - fair?" George agreed to never tell the parents, but
that wasn't enough for Joel.  "No one, not your best friend in the world -
hell you don't even speak about it with whoever you invited in public - you
got it?" George was agreeing with the terms when the doorbell rang, Joel
ran for the door and had just enough time to see Lennie's parents car
headed past the house.  Her sister Jennifer was at the door, "Lennie
dropped me off to see if it would be OK if we used the pool today?" Joel
assured her it was no problem, and she headed for the trail that lead to
her house.  Most of the houses in the neighborhood had a few acres of
property, and all of it was heavily wooded - so the trails were created to
reduce the walk between neighbors.  As time moved on, most of the parents
had gotten old enough to not be comfortable walking through those woods at
night - so many of them had purchased golf carts for moving back and forth.
This meant the trails belonged to the kids exclusively these days.

   With a smile, Joel advised George to get ready for another show.  George
was taken aback, as he didn't know that anyone had seen him yesterday. 
"This could get good bro, if you see me looking in at you, that means put
your trunks on and get your ass out there ASAP.  Can you dig that?  Heck,
maybe Jennifer will give you a shot." With that, Joel changed into his
suit, and grabbed a towel on his way out to the pool.  Once there he
punched up some tunes on the central stereo system and relaxed in the
swim-out, waiting to see who all would show.  I knew from experience that
he was kind of hoping Kim would show, since Jennifer was too young and
Lennie was with Gary.  He grinned when he heard some noise coming from the
trail on her side of the house, but was really shocked when the gate on the
other side opened unannounced.  In walked his neighbor Michelle and her
friend Stacey, Michelle's family had been friends with his since both of
them were in diapers, and both families had discovered this neighborhood
and decided to move there together about four years before.  Although she
was a year younger than us, she was great fun to hang out with - and even
if she seemed like a sister, she was still nice to look at.

   "Hi Joel, Lennie told us you were all getting together to swim, is it OK
if we join you?" I remember being confused by this, since her family had
their own pool - and that confusion showed on young Joel's face quite
clearly.  But now that I knew what this memory was, I was able to chuckle
at his naivete.  Joel indicated the more the merrier and they began to
setup chairs to sun on when Lennie and Jennifer came through the opposite
gate.  The disappointment was clear on Joel's face when it became apparent
that there was no Kim following along behind, but I thought he handled it
fairly well.  Lennie was greeting the other girls when she noticed Joel was
in the pool, "Hey Joel, didn't know you'd be joining us.  Don't you have
party preparations?" Joel feigned anger at this, "So I'm not allowed to use
my pool when I've given you the permission to come over?  Careful girl, you
might hurt my feelings.  The only preparations that matter are already
handled - I won't be decorating or anything."

   Circling the pool to sit on the edge of the swim-out, Lennie apologized
for her lack of manners.  "Sorry, I didn't mean to come off like a bitch,
it just that..." "Just that what?" Joel asked.  He noticed that she looked
at the others before answering, "Well Kimmy was telling us how exciting it
was when she was swimming naked to show your brother some skin.  We thought
that maybe we would try it today." Joel was about to ask why they would use
his pool over Michelle's if they planned to misbehave, when he realized
that due to having a corner lot - her families pool was open to the street.
"So I, whom you assumed would be prepping for the party, would need to do
that prep with my eyes closed?  That makes no sense to me Lennie." She
placed her hands on his shoulders, "No, I expected you would see us, I just
hadn't planned on us seeing you while it happened." Joel began to laugh,
"out of sight, out of mind, eh?  Well I've seen two of you naked before -
so I guess that's not too big a deal for me.  Have at it ladies, and if you
need to feel naughty, you can rest assured that baby brother will be in
there perving on you all, I have no doubt!"

   The girls shed their suits and made a few poses for George's sake before
splashing into the water.  As soon as things calmed down, it was Stacey who
rose to the bait Joel had provided earlier.  "So Joel, which of these
others are the two you've seen naked?" Joel took his time in answering,
choosing instead to do a thorough analysis of young Stacey before replying,
"Technically it's all of you as of a few minutes ago, but before that would
have been Lennie and Michelle." Both of them perked up, each wanting to
know when this supposedly happened.  "I know for a fact that you've never
seen me before today, so I assume you are lying about Michelle as well."
Michelle nodded in agreement with her statement, absolutely sure she was
correct.  Joel addressed his answer to Stacey, still admiring the view laid
out before him on a pool float.  "Well, if you only count it if they
stripped for me - then I guess they are both right.  If you count seeing
them naked at all though - I'm right." He turned to face both girls,
"Lennie, if you didn't want me to see you naked, you probably shouldn't be
having sex with my pal in the backseat of my car." Little sister Jennifer
let out an 'ooooooooooooohhhhhhhhh' as she heard that detail, and Joel
hoped he hadn't gotten Lennie in trouble with his revelation.  "And
Michelle and I have taken many baths together in the last fifteen years, so
technically I have seen her naked on many occasions, but this is the first
time in quite a while.  I'd say the view has improved, if that's not being
too forward." Both girls were sporting the full body blush by this point so
Joel decided to give them a break, he dove into the pool and dropped the
subject.

   After an hour or so, as well as several attempts to get Joel to join the
skinny dipping, the swim session was winding down.  While any other time he
would have been willing to go commando at the request of a group of lovely
girls - he had no desire to do so with his brother watching.  Although he
tried numerous times to signal George to come out, the kid must have
chickened out.  Joel announced that he needed to get going, he had party
stuff to handle in town.  He encouraged the girls to enjoy themselves for
as long as they desired before heading in to change.  George was in his
room with the door shut, so there was no way Joel was going in there to see
what had happened - he'd save that for later.  He dried off and got
changed, and noticed on his way out that the girls had not moved an inch
towards the exit.  He set the Jacuzzi to warm up, thinking it would be a
relaxing thing tonight, and perhaps a bit more entertaining the night of
the party.  "Ladies, I am out of here but I wanted to let you know that the
Jacuzzi is warming up.  It'll take about an hour to reach temperature, but
if you are still around then - feel free to use it."

   Before he could even back the car out of the garage, Stacey came running
around the corner in a t-shirt, carrying the rest of her clothes.  "Hey
Joel, can you give me a lift home?  It's on the way, and it will save my
mom from coming to get me later." Joel agreed and she jumped into the front
seat.  "That was pretty wild back there, huh?  I've never done anything
like that before.  All that nudity, how is it that you didn't go crazy?"
Joel explained that he very much enjoyed the view, but since she and
Jennifer were too young, Michelle was like a sister, and Lennie was dating
his buddy - a view was all it was.  Stacey was obviously upset with being
labeled too young, but she accepted his reasoning.  "Since I'm so young, I
should probably put my clothes on shouldn't I?" Only then did he become
aware that the t-shirt was all she had on, "Yes, I think that would be for
the best, especially since we are almost to your house.  What would your
family think if you got out of this car naked in broad daylight?" She
responded that no one would be home yet, and while she offered no verbal
invitation, she insinuated that perhaps he'd like to come in for a little
while.  "Listen, you are a beautiful girl and if I was a few years younger
- I'd jump at the chance.  But I am going to be eighteen soon, so why start
something that cannot possibly work?" Author's Note: If you've followed
along in this series, you already know what a hypocrite this explanation
will eventually turn me in to, but for now suffice it to say that it was a
very pissed off (but somewhat clothed, thankfully) girl that exited my
vehicle a few moments later.

   I began to quickly jump ahead, watching myself sing along to the radio
as I drove about setting things in motion for the party is not as much fun
as you'd think it'd be.

   When we returned to the house a few hours later, Joel could hear people
back by the pool.  Thinking it odd that they'd hung out for so long, he
went back to say hello, and found that Kimmy and Michelle's sister Monica
had joined the party in the Jacuzzi.  Joel was not surprised to find Kim in
her birthday suit, but Monica was a shock as she was such a prude normally.
As if in reply to his thought, she shrieked and reached for a towel to
cover herself when she saw him enter the pool area.  "And good afternoon to
you as well ladies!  Monica, I apologize for walking in on you like this.
Apparently I should knock before I enter my backyard, since it has become a
private nudist resort - not that I'm complaining!" Joel sat on the edge of
the Jacuzzi and dangled his feet into the water.  "Just for the record Mon,
from the brief flash I got - you have nothing to be embarrassed about, so
don't feel the need to cover up on my account." Lennie laughed and added,
"Yeah, I'm assuming you used to take baths with Joel as well, so you might
as well be comfortable!"

   The girls went on to explain that since all the boys had decided to go
camp on the beach that night, there was nothing else to do but hang out. 
They had enjoyed the naked swimming and were hoping to continue it for as
long as possible until Joel's parents returned.  Thinking that it was too
nice a night to waste, Joel invited them all to stay for dinner and maybe
they could do a bonfire.  "The party favors will not arrive until morning,
but I think I can scare up some supplies to make it an entertaining
evening. But first I probably need to go check on George, he may need IV
fluids if you've been out here all day." Michelle asked Joel to bring her
the phone, she'd need to make some arrangements to be able to stay and hang
out.  After giving it to her, Joel went to check on his brother - and try
as he might, he could not convince George to come hang out by the pool. 
"I'll join you at the fire once it gets dark, they'll put clothes on by
then so I wont be as embarrassed."

   When he returned to the pool, Joel was saddened to see Lennie and her
sisters getting dressed, and he said as much.  "So you won't be staying?  I
am sorry to hear that, you'll miss a really good dinner!" Lennie explained
that after hearing Michelle arrange for her parents to think that she and
Monica were staying at a friends house, they wanted to do the same thing
with theirs.  The plan was to go ask to stay at a friends, and that Kimmy
could drive them there before she left for the evening.  If all went as
planned, they'd be back in about two hours, because her parents always
talked to the parents where they were staying.  Present me could understand
this, as I have a daughter of my own who went through this stage.  "The
thing is, we will need to bring Christy back with us, since we are using
her mom for this, is that OK?" Joel agreed that'd be fine, Christy was a
fun chick.

   Christy and her parents, that topic could take a book by itself. 
Suffice it to say that her parents ran the house where anything was
allowed. The number of adventures that took place or at least started in
their family room is epic, as I'm sure the readers will one day find out.

   Shortly after the sisters left, Joel had lit the grill, and was
preparing the bonfire while Monica relaxed in the pool and Michelle
retrieved her car - parking it in the garage at Joel's.  The sun was
beginning to set and Joel thought it wise to leave the pool area lights off
for this event.  Once those tasks were completed, he announced he was going
to go change into his suit, when Monica chimed in "What do you need a suit
for?  We've been out here naked for hours - time for us to see what you got
Joel!" Michelle was in agreement, "I understand earlier, not wanting George
to see you out here - but it's almost full dark, if you're in the pool he
won't see a thing." Joel could not argue that point, so he dropped his
shorts by the pool stairs and walked into the pool.  The water wasn't
overly cold, but it was enough that he was glad he thought to turn on the
Jacuzzi earlier, he would need that shortly.  Either the constant nudity or
the deepening dark had emboldened Monica, who suggested they play Marco
Polo while they waited for the steaks to cook.  While the game resulted in
a few grabs and brushes, young me was doing a good job sticking to his guns
and not overly sexualizing the experience - they were just friends playing
a game, who happened to be naked.

   After a bit, Joel excused himself to go finish preparing their dinner.
Quite enjoying the freedom of his nudity, he didn't bother with his clothes
or a towel.  Since the meat was ready, but the other girls weren't expected
back for a while longer - he rolled a joint from his small stash and took
it out to the pool.  "I'm not sure you'd like some of this, but I'd be a
poor host indeed if I didn't at least offer it." He lit the joint and took
a drag, and Michelle held her hand out for the pass.  Not bothering to see
if Monica would join in, he was preparing to dive in, when he heard a voice
from the gate.  It was on Lennie's side of the yard, but the throat
clearing he heard was certainly not that of a young girl.  "Joel, it's Mr.
Boland, can I bother you for a second?" he said as he came through the
gate. With no time to make a move for anything that would offer some cover,
I watched young Joel decide to own the moment.  He was in his house, so why
would he bother?  He did realize that the odor of pot was strong in the
pool area, but he'd had this fight with his parents before - nothing too
worrying on that issue.  The two naked girls were a potential issue, but
looking over at the pool he realized that as long as they stayed in it -
know one would know who they were.

   We knew Mr.  Boland a bit, but not well.  Since he had only moved his
family in that summer, the other families had met a few times - there was
no need to be snobby - but to our knowledge, he wouldn't have known the
girls were from next door even if he saw them.  "Yes sir, what can I do for
you?" he asked the man as he approached, attempting to cut the distance to
keep him as far away from the girls as possible.  He immediately realized
that Joel was naked, but if the pot registered - he didn't show any care
for it.  "I am sorry to interrupt your little party, Joel, but we need to
talk for a minute - would it be possible for you to put something on?" Joel
invited Mr.  Boland in, "And call me Jim please.  I was just looking at
your dick son." to take a seat on the patio while he grabbed his shorts. 
Whether or not Monica had helped to smoke the joint, we never knew, but her
hollering that it was cheating for Joel to put his shorts back on was
enough to worry him that Jim would know that voice.  From this close, Joel
could see Michelle clearly and he stared directly at her when he spoke
"Excuse me ladies, I need to talk to Jim for a few, y'all stay comfortable
- I shall return." She seemed to pickup on the message, and nodded that
they'd stay put.

   When Joel walked into the covered patio area, he could tell that Jim was
very uncomfortable - but wasn't sure if it was the situation, or what he
was wanting to talk about.  "Mr.  Boland, " he stopped Jim before he could
insist, "sir, I have my clothes on now, and you are an adult.  Mr.  Boland
would make me more comfortable.  What can I do for you sir?" He was clearly
upset about something, so Joel tried to break the ice a bit.  "Have you
eaten?  I just pulled some steaks off the grill, and I can get you a drink
if you'd like." When Jim refused both, Joel dug in "Obviously you are upset
sir, I hope that we weren't being too loud or anything..." This was almost
impossible, while Michelle's house was only about fifty yards away from
ours, the house Jim and his family had purchased was more than a football
field away through heavy woods.  Finally, as if realizing the only way to
get started was to just say it - Jim asked Joel if he knew where Gary was
right then.  Joel assured him that Gary was camping at the beach with the
rest of the guys.  "He is about a two hour drive away right now, may I ask
why you wanted to know?"

   When Jim started talking, it came out in a torrent.  "I saw his dumb ass
this morning with some redheaded girl who looked to be about twenty years
old.  He knows I saw him, hell he came over and said hi to me!  I was
worried that I'd come home to a sobbing mess of a daughter, but instead I
hear that all of my daughters have been over here all day.  I was hoping
they'd still be here on the hike over - but I'm glad they're not.  No
offense, you seem like a good kid, and I know you -(TM)re older than your
fuckhead buddy - but you are a lot more mature than my young daughters."
Joel was confused, "Sir, I am not sure what you are insinuating, I know
your girls - and I like them.  When they asked if they could use my pool,
it would have been un-neighborly to refuse them.  I can assure you that I
spent the bulk of my day running errands in town, and they left shortly
after I returned - the talk was of going to Christy's, but I don't know if
they are still there.  As far as Gary, he is a bit immature, but he is a
good guy.  If you saw him with a girl, then yes there is a good chance that
he is moving on from Lennie - but I'm not sure what I am expected to do
about that."

   Jim seemed relieved, and I knew from experience that he was relaxing in
the realization that he was not going to have to go searching for Gary to
prevent his daughter from getting hurt.  "I'm sorry to have interrupted
your party Joel, it's good to know that she is not out with him right now.
I know she's not always where she says she's going to be, but if he is that
far away - not even Kimmy would drive her that far.  Before I go, I would
be remiss if I didn't point out to you that those girls out there are
someone's daughter as well.  If you ever have a daughter, you will
understand - for now just treat them right, OK?"

   I knew the answer that was coming, and as a father, current me would
have smacked the shit out of young me - but I had to respect the point.

   "Mr.  Boland.  Jim.  If you had two naked girls in your swimming pool,
what would you have done at my age?" Joel smiled.  "Honestly, sir, you
don't know those girls, but I have for close to forever.  I have no ill
intentions, and shortly they will go home - safe and sound.  I am having a
party tomorrow, but it will be a bit more traditional.  I'm not sure if
Lennie will show up, but Gary is coming.  I will make sure there is no
drama and that your daughter is also safe and sound - but I cannot fault my
friend if he has met someone else can I?" Jim looked around again, "where
are your parents?  Are you on you own here?" Joel told him that his parents
were out for the weekend, and that rather than camping on the beach, he had
stayed home to keep an eye on his little brother.  "Sir, you have seen
enough here tonight to sink me into weeks of punishment.  I can only hope
that my willingness to lend a hand to your cause - protecting Lennie - will
buy me some discretion in return.  You are correct, I am older than most of
my friends.  In fact, I will soon turn eighteen.  Do I strike you as the
type of person who is not completely aware of what that means with regard
to your, and others, young daughters?"

   Sometimes young me is so smug that I want to kick his ass.  What
eighteen year old speaks like that to an adult - especially one who has him
dead to rights?  Jim, smiling wickedly, rose from his chair.  "I think
discretion would be best, for now.  I will even make sure that Larry
doesn't come over - how's that sound?" Joel looked as if he'd been kicked
in the gut.  "You probably are a real smart guy, Joel - but don't dismiss
the benefit of experience.  You would have gotten it past me, I cannot see
anything out there with these old eyes.  But you gave yourself away,
without even realizing it.  We live thirty miles from anywhere, so how were
those girls gonna just 'go home' unless they lived next door?" Joel
grimaced.  "Don't beat yourself up about it.  Like I said, experience is
important - and that will come with time.  As for what I would have done at
your age?  I trust you because I didn't walk in on you doing what I would
have done when I was eighteen.  Enjoy your party, and keep an eye on my
daughter." With that, he was gone.

   After having a quick bite to eat, Joel encouraged the sisters to put
some clothes on before making their way over to the bonfire, which at this
point was burning nicely.  They complained, but were grateful for even the
small amount of protection their suits and cover-ups provided once they
were into the wooded portion of the yard.  At this point, good old George
decided to join the party - since the clothes were back on.  Joel was
preparing to light the second joint when the Boland sisters finally
returned sans Christy, who'd apparently decided to go see a movie.  He
decided to wait a bit on the smoke, wanting the younger kids to be inside
when he lit that up.

   Kim and Lennie were disappointed about the clothed nature of the
gathering at the bonfire, and soon moved back to the pool area to be more
comfortable.  That lead to George deciding to head back inside, at which
point Joel convinced Jennifer that maybe she should go hang out with him.
He doubted that anything would happen, but maybe the kid would get lucky.
He then produced the joint and passed it around.  Lennie was not a smoker,
but asked Joel if he had anything else laying around, "Won't be here until
the morning, sorry about that, I hadn't expected all this company - not
that I'm complaining.  There's some booze in the house if you'd like, just
go easy on the gin and scotch, the rest I can fill back up tomorrow when
the booze gets here." After everyone got their drinks, Joel relaxed in the
Jacuzzi while they all went back and forth between it and the pool.  "Man,
I could get used to this." he said aloud, but to no one in particular.

   "Which part?" Monica asked, "the lounging in the hot tub, or being
surrounded by naked girls?" Joel had to agree that both were wonderful, "I
was mostly talking about the freedom I've had today, but the view has been
spectacular.  I cannot wait until I'm on my own - that is the best part."
Lennie chimed in, "Yeah, but once you get married and have kids, all that
will go away again, so enjoy it while you can." Knowing the truth of those
words, and how quickly those days would come, I could only chuckle to
myself as I listened to my young self explaining that he didn't really see
the need to get married.  "Won't matter anyway," Monica said "He's
obviously gay, we've been naked around him all day and there has been no
response at all." The girls began to chuckle at Joel's expense.  When he
attempted to defend himself, using the same logic as earlier - the
unanimous decision was that no matter what - a non-gay guy would have risen
to the occasion more than a few times during the days events.

   "Kimmy is here now, since we know you don't see any of us that way, what
about her?" Lennie asked.  As he thought of his answer, Kim started
strutting around the pool like she was on a catwalk.  The other girls were
clapping and cheering her on, and as she finally reached the Jacuzzi he
joined his admiration with theirs.  "Let's see how I did, stand up for us
Joel." Young me demurred, "I'd rather not right this second." But the group
was not to be denied, so after a few seconds - not near long enough to ease
his present condition - Joel stood on the bench he'd been sitting on. 
Kim's smile was almost predatory, "ooh is that for me?  Told you, he's not
gay - he just prefers older women." She then dove back into the pool,
leaving me standing there like a schmuck.

   Now, in most stories, there would be a short paragraph here describing
our equipment as some kind of magnificent talisman.  Words like stiff rod,
and about as big as a baseball bat would abound.  Alas, even in my heyday I
was a mere mortal - if you like that stuff, you are bound to be
disappointed here.  I am not a superman, nor am I some strange guy with
ultimate discipline and control.  I am, then and now, a man with a sense of
right and wrong - and while it may not jive with yours, it's all I -(TM)ve
got.

   "So, not gay - just not into any of the rest of us?" Monica asked.  The
girl was too smart for her own good, even back then.  Joel again explained
that it was not an insult, just that they were off limits - for various
reasons." Monica began to strut around as Kim had, "So this has no effect?"
Joel shook his head, feeling much more secure now that he'd sat back down.
"Imagine seeing your brother standing here like I just was, would that get
you hot?" Michelle grimaced at the thought, but her younger sister was a
bit more analytic.  "I would not want to jump his bones, but I would
certainly look.  Especially after the day we've had here - I've been
practically vibrating for most of the day.  So you honestly feel nothing
seeing me like this?" I knew the bind he was in, four attractive girls all
wanted to feel sexy - but three of them were strictly off the menu and the
fourth had never shown an interest.  "There's no point in lying, I find it
very hot that you all feel so comfortable like this.  I doubt I will ever
forget this night - but no, I am not a danger to jump on any of you three
for the previously mentioned reasons." The slick little shit had hung out
the bait, oh to be so young and confident again!