The Dromat fleet hung silent in the lone reaches of dark space. Each ship was a dark hulk barely visible against the blackness of space. Although the ships had minimal fighting ability, all of which were basically defensive, they still looked threatening. The real danger posed by the ships was not visible. Inside each ship were ten thousand space mines.
James looked at the huge fleet and asked, "Will there be enough Dromats to staff all of those ships when the Chitiniodian fleet arrives for the big battle?"
"Yes," Cousin Itt answered feeling awed by the fleet. It was one thing to know intellectually about the fleet, but it was another to actually see it for himself.
"It is impressive," James said.
"Each ship carries three different types of mines," Cousin Itt said. The mines had been designed through collaboration among Dactites, Dromats, and Humans. They were designed using the information they had collected about the weaknesses and strengths of the Chitiniodian ships.
"Three?" James asked.
"Yes. One type is based on the geodesic sphere. It will expand when it is near a ship until it touches the shield. Shaped charges will explode to take out the shield. From the center, a laser will fire into the enemy ship," Cousin Itt said with the Dromat equivalent of a smile. He was so pleased that they would be able to use the geodesic sphere in this war.
"Interesting," James said. He hadn't known about that mine.
"It will really be effective when used against their little fighter ships," Cousin Itt added. With the geodesic sphere opening out to a range of more than ten kilometers the surprise factor was going to be very large.
"I can imagine," James said.
"One mine will be able to stop several of their fighters before it is totally expended."
"That's good," James said trying to imagine what it would look like in use.
"The other mine is a basic explosive mine with a ballistic projectile. We based it off the umbrella," Cousin Itt said. It was a good basic mine, but it didn't open up like the umbrella weapon that James had invented.
"Excellent," James said with a smile.
"The last is a nuclear explosive mine that will disable all enemy ships within range when it is tripped. We only carry a few of those on each ship," Cousin Itt said. Those were the ones that made him the most nervous.
"Those are weapons of last resort," James said noticing the unease of the Dromat. He added, "Hopefully, we won't have to use them until the final battle."
"I hope that we never have to use them. They make me very uneasy," Cousin Itt said.
James looked out the porthole and said, "It is a fine looking fleet."
"Thank you," Cousin Itt said. He was very proud of the fleet that had been assembled.
A lighted ship slowly approached from the direction of the Dromat planet. James said, "It looks like the President is coming for a visit."
"Although it is not customary for hosts and guests to exchange presents, I am sure that President Drall will enjoy the gift that you've brought us," Cousin Itt said.
James looked over at the Dromat with a smile. The bland brown hair of the Dromat had been dyed with a profusion of colors using the temporary hair dye James had ordered. Cousin Itt looked a lot like a cross between a dust mop and a psychedelic poster. James asked, "How do you like it?"
"I love it," Cousin Itt said with a little shake of his fur. The effect of the multi-colored fur shimmering was almost overwhelming. Psychedelic purple, pink, red, yellow, green, and blue swirled about with hypnotic effect.
"I'm glad. After I've given him the selection of dyes you can model the result for him. Don't come out of the shuttle until I call for you," James said.
"Yes. I'm sure that he'll love the hair dye too," Cousin Itt said. He had spent almost an hour in front of a mirror looking at his reflection.
James smiled and said, "That's great."
Leaning over to James, Cousin Itt said, "My mate thinks it is most attractive."
"That's even better," James said with a smile.
Cousin Itt looked over at Junior and, trying to remember the word for what Junior was wearing, said, "I like his — wig?"
Junior was wearing a clown wig that was bright green, red, and blue. Junior gave Cousin Itt two thumbs up and said, "Thanks. Dad has one just like it."
Cousin Itt asked, "Why aren't you wearing yours?"
James sighed and said, "Lt. Powell said that I couldn't wear it. Normally that wouldn't have stopped me, but Ken agreed with him. He said there is something in the regulations about it not being allowed."
"Pity," Cousin Itt said. He added, "It would make you look much better. Your species looks so unhealthy without hair."
"You've got to admit that I'm a great looking specimen for my species," James said with a smile.
Cousin Itt said, "There is a mechanic on the ship who has hair all over his body. I think he is much better looking than you."
"You would," James said with a laugh. The ship with the President aboard came to a stop beside the Deceiver. James said, "Let's get in the shuttle and head over for a visit with President Drall."
Ann looked over at James and said, "James, there's just one thing you should do before we leave."
"What?" James asked.
"Remove Junior's wig," Ann answered.
James could see that she was serious. He said, "He's so cute in it. If I'm not allowed to wear one, at least he should be able to wear it."
"Now," Ann said.
"Why?" James asked knowing that it was a lost cause.
"Because I don't want the rest of the universe thinking that he's a clown," Ann answered.
"I'm not a clown; I'm a chip off the old block," Junior said pointing at his father.
Nervously pacing around in the landing bay, President Drall could hardly wait to meet James. This was the most exciting event of his presidency. For a change, every major member of the press was present to observe this historic event. He leaned over to his advisor and asked, "What kind of present do you think he brought?"
"I have no idea," the advisor answered for the hundredth time that afternoon. Many members of the Dromat Press had speculated that James would bring a hat for them. Others had suggested that it would be something like the umbrella or geodesic sphere.
President Drall shivered as he looked in the direction of the shuttle. He said, "I'm so excited. I love getting presents."
"Calm down, sir," the advisor said noticing that the President's hair had become a little tangled. He gestured to a female Dromat to come over and brush President Drall's hair. He felt that it was important for the Dromats to make a good impression on their visitor.
While the female Dromat fussed over him, President Drall said, "I can't believe that I'm actually going to meet Admiral James Kamp."
The advisor gave a little shake and said, "I know what you mean, sir."
"How much longer until he's able to leave the shuttle?" President Drall asked. It was necessary for the atmosphere to be replaced in the shuttle holding area.
"It should be any time now," the advisor answered.
"The suspense is killing me. What kind of present do you think he brought?"
"I don't know, sir," the advisor answered.
The door of the shuttle opened. It was almost a full minute before James stepped out and looked around. To one side was the assembled press corps. They were hard to miss because of the abundant cameras and microphones aimed in his direction. Ahead of him was a small gathering of very important looking individuals. There was one person standing in front of all of the others. He headed in the direction of the President.
The whole audience gave a little shake of excitement. It looked like a thousand dust mops being shaken simultaneously. Lieutenant Powell, carrying Starchild in his hands, followed behind James hoping that the Dromats liked the present James was carrying.
James stopped in front of President Drall and, using the translations of Starchild and a Slathern, said, "Hello, President Drall. I know that it is not your custom to accept gifts from visitors, but I've brought one anyway. I hope that you will like it."
"Admiral Kamp. It is a pleasure to welcome you to our solar system. There has been much speculation about the present that you've brought with you," President Drall said. He looked around for a second and said, "I must admit that I'm very curious about what you have brought for us."
James held out the small box he was carrying with him. Although he was tempted to make the President wait, he said, "There's no need to wait a minute longer."
President Drall reached out and grabbed it. He opened the box and looked at the small plastic tubes that were nestled inside. He frowned and asked, "What is this?"
James smiled and said, "It might be better if I showed you."
"Yes, of course," President Drall said feeling a little underwhelmed by the contents of the box.
James turned to face the shuttle and shouted, "Cousin Itt."
There was a low murmur of noise while members of the press spouted their usual baseless speculations about what was happening to a distant audience. The noise lasted until Cousin Itt stepped out of the shuttle. Initially, his appearance was greeted with thunderous silence. All eyes took in the colors that covered Cousin Itt.
Suddenly, there was the sound of a hundred feet slamming against the floor. It repeated as everyone started marching in place. This was the Dromat equivalent of a standing ovation. The pace quickly turned from sedate march to frantic dance which was a sign of great amazement in addition to admiration.
James looked around at everyone in attendance. Smiling, he turned to the President and asked, "What do you think of it?"
"It is marvelous. Such colors as I can hardly imagine," President Drall exclaimed without pause from his foot stomping dance. He could barely keep his eyes from staring at Cousin Itt.
The very loud march of bare feet hitting the floor of the space ship lasted for almost three minutes. James later found out that it was nearly a record for the normally sedate Dromat. Applause at a graduation ceremony normally lasted about ten seconds. The last time there had been applause of that duration had been when the first Dromat spaceship had lifted off for space.
Suspecting that he knew the answer, Lieutenant Powell edged forward and asked, "What is going on?"
"They are applauding," James answered. Although James had never seen it before, he knew what it was since Cousin Itt had described the act to him.
"So they like the gift?" Lieutenant Powell asked. He felt a little bad about having laughed when he had first seen Cousin Itt. It was a natural mistake to assume that James had just played some kind of joke on the Dromat.
"Yes, they like the gift," James answered.
Starchild, born with the memories of his ancestors implanted in him while still in the egg, said, "I have no memories of a Quatyl seeing this."
"You're young, yet," James said. He looked back at the shuttle to find Ann, Junior, Starman, and Stardust peeking out the door trying to see what was going on. He waved to them.
"I've got memories going back five thousand years to when the Quatyl first encountered the Dromat," Starchild said.
"You're just a babe in the woods," James said.
Junior seeing his opportunity, dashed out of the shuttle still wearing his clown wig. He ran over to his father while being chased by Ann. Upon reaching his father, Junior said, "They are excited."
"Yes, they are," James said.
Lieutenant Powell said, "It looks like you struck a homerun again."
The stomping finally died down and President Drall turned to James. He said, "That is a most exciting gift. I can't wait to learn how to use it."
"There are instructions in the box on how to use it. There are also instructions on how to make it," James said.
President Drall looked in the box and noticed the papers stuck under the tubes of hair dye. He handed the box to his advisor and said, "Take this and have the instructions sent out to the appropriate place of manufacture."
The advisor took the box and ran three steps away. He stopped and turned to face James. Giving a quick stamp of his feet, he said, "It has been an honor meeting you, Admiral Kamp."
Irritated at the delay, President Grall said, "Run along. Get that information to the people."
"Yes, sir," the advisor said turning to flee.
President Grall gestured to another advisor who brought a small box to him. The box was very ornate. It was made of a variety of precious minerals native to their planet and inlaid within silver. President Grall offered the box to James and said, "I picked the stone myself."
"The box is very beautiful," James said accepting it from the Dromat.
President Grall said, "Some of our most talented artists worked together to make it."
"It is a treasure," James said.
James opened the box and took out the stone. Smiling, he held up the stone for everyone to see. In a very loud voice that would carry to the press, he said, "It is perfect."
"I'm so relieved," President Grall said.
James replaced the stone inside the box and handed it to Lieutenant Powell. He said, "We will put this with the others."
"Yes, sir," Lieutenant Powell said unable to believe the quality of the box that held the basic stone.
James, Ann, and Junior stood on the raised dais on the marching grounds of the newly created Military Academy of Space Service while the graduating class passed by in a stately march. These were the young Dromat males and females who would be staffing the Dromat fleet. There were over a thousand of them in the graduating class.
Their march was a little different than the type of march practiced by American soldiers who raised the feet up and down or the Russian style of march with legs that raised high in front. The Dromats tended to swing from side to side as they shuffled past. The movement caused their long hair to sway to and fro.
The class slowly filed in and took positions on the broad lawn in front of the dais. The lawn was not covered with grass, but a pale green moss. The moss was a throwback to the Dromat ancestry as a creature of the arctic tundra that covered much of their planet. To James, the lawn looked a lot like a very fine green carpet.
President Drall leaned over and said, "You might not believe it, but every Dromat of age has volunteered to join the space service. The class that will graduate next year is just as large as this one. In ten years, we'll have over ten thousand members in our space force."
"Amazing," James said watching the young Dromats shuffle past in a line four abreast. He asked, "If this is all of the young men and women of age, how will you ever fill all of the ships in space?"
"We've had a bit of a breeding frenzy as a result of the Human Mating Effect. Our population increased by twenty thousand this year. At this rate, we'll have more than enough when it comes to the final battle with the Chitiniodians," President Drall answered.
"Ah," James said. The mine layers did not require as large of a crew as the battleships of the other races. A handful of Dromats on the bridge, a handful of Dromats to staff the defensive weapons, and two dozen Dromats to lay the mines were all that required on any given shift. The mine layers also served on the repair crews. With three shifts, a ship only required a crew of a hundred.
"This class is particularly fortunate in many ways. They are the first graduates of a Military Academy in the history of the Dromat. They will staff ten ships of the fleet. They will have the honor of coming up with the techniques for distributing mines," President Drall said.
The advisor said, "I wish that I was young enough to join them. This is so exciting."
"Exciting?" James asked seeing that the advisor was doing a little dance indicating his extreme excitement.
President Drall looked nervously at Starman and then said, "The ships in space are the first true Dromat Fleet to exist since we encountered the Quatyl five thousand years ago. Those ships will be captained by a Dromat and not a Quatyl. You have no idea how exciting that is to us."
"I can imagine," James said. He turned to watch the last of the graduates reach the field in front of the stand. All of the graduates started a little dance. Watching them, Ann said, "My God. It looks like an explosion at a paint factory."
Junior said, "They look like hairy parrots."
President Drall relaxed in his favorite chair looking at James and Cousin Itt. James was seated on a portable chair that he had brought along since the Dromats were about half the size of an average person. Cousin Itt was seated on a little stool.
With Starman on his lap providing translation services, James asked, "How is it going with the dancing ship, President Drall?"
"It is a very interesting concept," President Drall answered evasively. He gave a little shake creating a whirl of colors that was almost sufficient to give a normal person a headache.
Curious, James said, "That doesn't answer my question."
"It is big," President Drall answered. The ship was about the size of their entire fleet once it unfolded in space.
"That still doesn't answer my question."
Cousin Itt said, "We can get it to move, but we can't control it."
"Really?" James asked looking over at Cousin Itt. Starman looked up at James thinking that he was taking the news well.
"It just kind of flops around wildly," President Drall said embarrassed that they hadn't been able to get the strange craft functioning correctly.
"Really?" James asked getting excited.
"You don't seem disappointed," Cousin Itt said.
"He looks quite angry," President Drall said mistaking the grin for something a lot more aggressive.
"He's happy," Cousin Itt said having much more experience with the strange expressions of humans.
Starman said, "The weirdest things make him happy."
"Really?" President Drall asked looking over at Cousin Itt with a worried expression.
"You can't control it at all?" James asked.
President Drall answered, "Not at all. Once we turn it on, it twists, rotates and bends in a most unexpected manner. After about three hours every one we've build has fallen apart."
"You say it falls apart?" James asked imagining a giant ship flying apart in thousands of pieces.
"That's right," Cousin Itt said.
"What happens to the parts?" James asked thinking this was getting better and better the more he learned.
"They just fly in every direction," Cousin Itt said.
"This is fantastic," James said grinning broadly.
"Fantastic?"
President Drall asked, "What does he mean?"
"The Chitiniodians won't have a chance of figuring out what they are facing," James said imagining the battle.
"It can't hurt them," President Drall said.
"It can confuse them and sometimes that is a whole lot better," James said with a grin.
President Drall thought about it for a few seconds and then said, "I don't understand."
"What are we supposed to be doing while it is moving uncontrollably?" Cousin Itt asked.
"The Dromat will be doing nothing," James answered.
"What about the Chitiniodians?" President Drall asked.
"I imagine that they'll attack the ship," James answered.
"That will accomplishing nothing," President Drall said with the Dromat equivalent of a frown.
James grinned and said, "Do you see how effective that strategy is?"
"No."