Sean and Suzie talked for a long time out in the woods. Of course, Suzie was very curious about the kinds of things that Sean could do with his magic. She asked a thousand questions, the majority of which Sean could only answer, "I don't know." He didn't mind the questions and actually found them quite insightful. As a result of them, he had about a hundred experiments to perform.
After one suggestion from Suzie, Sean tied a little piece of string to the controller of the puppet and he was able to get it to walk around without being supported by the tree. Sean enjoyed having the puppet perform for an appreciative audience. After that little bit of experimentation was over, Suzie said, "That was amazing."
"Thanks. It is hard coordinating all of those movements," Sean said.
"Well, the puppet proves that you can use a small thing to move around heavier things," Suzie said.
"That's true. Want to tie some strings around your wrists and ankles?" Sean asked.
"No. You'll make me walk like a goose or something," Suzie said.
"I wouldn't do that," Sean said. He had been imaging having her perform a sexy dance.
Suzie laughed and said, "Knowing you, you'll probably make me strip or something."
Sean blushed and replied, "No."
"Right," Suzie said. She looked at her watch and said, "I better get back to the house. Are you still coming over to swim after lunch?"
"Yes," Sean answered.
"Great, I'll see you after lunch," Suzie said. She leaned over and kissed him.
A voice from the woods said, "Finally. I thought they would never get to the good stuff. Maybe they'll start rubbing bodies soon."
Suzie looked in the direction from which the voice came and said, "Not in the woods."
Disappointed, Sean said, "There's nothing to see here."
"I'll admit that you're not much to look at, but the nymph is pretty pleasing to the eyes."
"He's definitely not worth looking at. She's a different matter all together."
Sean rolled his eyes and said, "Maybe I should walk you home."
"Good idea," Suzie said. She looked around trying to spot the Dwarves.
Sean picked up the puppet and put it back into the box. He took Suzie's hand and said, "Let's go."
The pair walked back to the path. It wasn't actually that far. At the path to her house, she kissed him a second time. Sean decided that he could really get into kissing. He watched her walk to her house. Only after she disappeared from view did he turn towards his house.
Entering the house, Sean went into the living room and held out the box with the puppet for his sister to take. He said, "I found this in the garage."
"What is it?" Lily asked looking at the box.
Sean grinned and said, "It is our older brother."
"What?" Lily asked jumping back a little.
After opening the box, Sean pulled out the puppet and held it up for her to see. He said, "See. His name is BB."
"Oh. It's a puppet," Lily said reaching out for it. She asked, "What kind of name is BB?"
"Big Brother," Sean answered giving her the puppet.
Rolling her eyes, Lily said, "That's great. Now I can tell everyone at school that one of my brothers is a clown and the other is a puppet."
"What does that make you?" Sean asked raising an eyebrow.
Without missing a beat, Lily answered, "The smart one of the family."
"I walked into that one," Sean said shaking his head.
"I'd say that you hit that one running," his mother said from behind him.
Sean turned and flashed a smile at his mother. He said, "I'm just giving her opportunities to practice her rapier-like wit so that she can survive dealing with you and Dad."
"Isn't that like how football players use tackling dummies during football practice?" his mother asked.
"Yes," Sean answered.
Lily said, "It sure is nice of you to help the football players train."
"Are you sure that you're only eight?" Sean asked surprised at her comment.
"Quite sure," Lily answered. "Are you sure that you're eighteen?"
"Play with the puppet," Sean said shaking his head.
"Lunch will be ready soon," his mother announced.
"I can't believe that it is lunchtime and I haven't been to the store yet," Sean said.
His mother said, "I could send you there for something if you insist."
"No. I'm fine lounging around the house," Sean said realizing that he hadn't done that much lounging.
"I'm not sure that I'm fine with that," his mother said with a smile.
After eating lunch, Sean went to his bedroom and sat down at his desk to think about his morning. It appeared that the Brownies had cleaned the garage during the night. He had learned some important lessons about his gift of magic. He had been discovered using magic by Susie; something that could have destroyed his new relationship with her.
He smiled as he thought about Suzie. At least she had taken the news about his magical power well. She hadn't freaked out or declared him a freak. Maybe the Dwarves had brought up things he would rather have not discussed, but he felt that their unseen presence had taken some of the edge off of the story. At least she had enjoyed the puppet show.
He wondered why his mother had stopped sending him to the store. It was even stranger that Mrs. Emery had stopped hovering over him and Suzie like a vulture over road kill. He was convinced now that they had been trying to keep him and Suzie apart. All of sudden they didn't care anymore. In fact, they had gone out of their way to throw them together with that surprising dinner the previous evening.
He glanced at the clock and thought about how much time had to pass before he would be heading over to swim at her house. He was looking forward to spending the afternoon with her. He thought about her in her one piece swimming suit. While it was true that it didn't show much skin, it definitely showed off her figure. By all standards that Sean knew; she had a great figure. His eyes were drawn to the drawer of his night table while his mind entertained thoughts involving the rubbers that were stored in the drawer.
Suzie didn't wear the one piece swimming suit that afternoon. She wore the skimpy little thing that barely qualified as a bathing suit. Upon seeing her, Sean discovered that it was possible to drown in a swimming pool in which he could stand. All of his appendages except for the one between his legs had suddenly stopped working.
The closer Suzie got to him, the worse his condition became. His tongue and mouth stopped working as well. As she approached, he complimented her swimsuit, "Blug blab dab dub."
"What?" Suzie asked.
"Dingle blurry brab blub," Sean said wondering how 'You look real good, ' came out sounding like the noises issuing from his mouth.
Looking at him, Suzie asked, "Are you okay?"
"Yeth," Sean said concentrating on getting his mouth to work.
"You don't look okay," Suzie said noticing that he was swaying from one side to the other. He looked like he was about to faint.
"Yeah."
"Do you like the bathing suit?" Suzie asked while adjusting the straps to her top.
"Yub," Sean answered swearing that he had caught a glimpse of her aureole when she had adjusted her top. All of the blood fled from his brain.
She looked at the expression on his face and burst out laughing. She said, "You're so funny."
"Yab," Sean answered.
She went to hug him and jumped back when she was poked by something. Looking down at him through the water, she realized what had poked her. A little embarrassed, but satisfied that her swimsuit had the desired effect, she said, "You must really like it."
"Blathder," Sean answered wishing that his mouth would start working again.
Curious, she reached down in the water and said, "You must really like it."
Sean dropped like a rock the moment her hand touched him. There just wasn't enough blood left in his brain to process her touch and remain standing. Realizing that he was about to drown, Suzie grabbed him and pulled his head above water. She towed him over to the stairs wondering how she was going to get him out of the water.
Her mother chose that moment to come out the back door. She took one look at the situation and grinned. She remembered a similar situation when she was about Suzie's age. She said, "I told you that suit would kill him."
Struggling to keep his head above water, Suzie said, "Help me get him out of the water."
It was about that time when Sean realized that Suzie's mother was there. The thought that she would send him to the vet upon seeing his erection had the effect of redirecting the flow of blood away from that particular organ. His brain cleared up a little. He managed to get his feet under him and stood up. He said, "I'm better now."
"Can you stand?" Suzie asked taking a small step backwards.
Sean turned to her to answer when he noticed that her top had shifted a bit. Considering that there wasn't much material to start with, the slightest shift in suit exposed a lot to view. Even the threat of the vulture taking him to the vet was not enough to stop the reaction. In horror, the only words that escaped from his mouth were, "I no want snip snip."
Mrs. Emery laughed at the obvious panic on his face and wondered what was suddenly responsible for it. She looked at Suzie and saw the reason. She grinned and said, "Fix your top."
Looking down, Suzie turned scarlet upon seeing what she was showing the world. She quickly covered up and turned away from Sean. She had wanted to get his interest, but not show everything. Adjusting the little patches of cloth, she said, "No wonder he's acting that way."
Sean survived the afternoon of swimming. It took some time, but his reaction to her bathing suit finally abated to the point where they could splash around in the water without him drowning. Much to his surprise, the vulture barely put in an appearance the entire afternoon. He didn't trust it. He reached home with the worst case of blue balls in his entire life.
At home, he stopped by the bathroom to take care of his problem before going into his bedroom. Once there, he considered his situation. It seemed like a lot of things had happened in the past few weeks. He had gained a magic power and he had gotten a girlfriend. Those were two pretty big things, but it seemed to him like there had been a lot of little changes that added up to a lot. His mother had stopped asking him to make a dozen trips to the store every day.
He went to his money drawer and looked at the amount of money it held. In a year he was going to need some gold to get another magic power. He went to the web and looked up the price of gold. With his money, he could get a little more than five ounces of gold. He had no idea what that magic power would be, but he figured it would be just about as useful as the one he currently had. It was nice, but not all that useful. What had once looked like a lot of money didn't look like all that all that much.
Frowning, he sat back in his chair thinking about it. He had planned to use his money to buy a used car. Now that he was dating Suzie, he wanted to get the car sooner rather than later. His mother very seldom let him use her car. His father never let him use his car since it was a company car and only authorized drivers could use it. He sighed and said, "I guess there's no way around it; I've got to get a job. Maybe Sam at the store will give me a good reference."
Lily bounced into his bedroom and said, "Mom says that dinner is ready."
"Okay," Sean said getting up from his seat. Lily was already headed to the table by the time he reached the door of his room.
Feeling good about his decision to find a job, Sean joined his family in the dining room. Looking at the table, he was pleased to see that they were having Ukrainian Cabbage. This was a nice dish that had cabbage stuffed with rice and cooked in tomato juice. While taking a seat, he said, "I'm going to look for a job tomorrow."
"A job? You're going to work?" his mother asked surprised by his announcement.
Shrugging his shoulders, Sean answered, "Now that I'm dating Suzie, I figure that I'll need a little money."
"That's a good idea," his mother said staring at him.
"I think I'd like to get a car, too," he said glancing over at his father. His father didn't look surprised by that little announcement.
"Oh," his mother said suddenly feeling a little old.
Frowning, Sean asked, "Are you feeling okay?"
"She just realized that her little boy is all grown up," his father said in a rather paternal tone of voice.
"You don't say?" Sean asked looking at his mother. He figured that the theatrics were going to start any minute.
His mother made a gesture as if wiping a tear from her eye. Theatrically, she said, "Oh woe is me. My little itty bitty baby boy has growed up."
"Aw," Sean said with the barest hint of sympathy in his voice.
Lily looked over at her father and asked, "Is growed even a word?"
"It is, but only because your mother used it," her father answered.
His mother wiped a hand across her forehead and said, "He has a girl friend who wants to steal him away from his dear dear mother. Now he wants a job and a car in which he can make his great escape from this loving home that I've created for him. Before you know it, he'll have a career and will move into a place of his own. I'll be left behind suffering from an empty nest syndrome.
"That is just the beginning of my personal tragedy. Soon he'll be getting married and fathering yard apes of his own. I'll be a grandmother years before my time. I'll spend all of my money spoiling them rotten, but he won't care about my financial health. He'll drive me into bankruptcy by producing more children than I can afford to spoil.
"He'll forget all about me when I get old and wrinkled. My hair will turn gray, my arthritis will act up, and I'll shrink as my bones disintegrate. He'll laugh when I'm eating cat food while I'm trying to live off the pittance that is my pension. Cast off by the children for whom I've given the best years of my life, I'll disappear into the house surrounded by a dozen cats. I'll die and no one will know."
Lily was clapping her hands and saying, "Bravo. That was a great rant."
"Sounds like a plan to me," Sean said with a grin.
"You heartless beast," his mother said shaking her head.
Clearing his throat, his father looked across the table. He asked, "Where do I fit in that picture?"
"You don't. I'll be a widow," she answered.
His father considered her answer before he said, "That's pretty poor planning on your part."
"Is Dad going to die?" Lily asked. She wasn't really worried. They had similar conversations about once a week or so.
His father answered, "No."
Sean said, "He'll be around for a long time."
"That's right, Lily. It will take me a long time to come up with a perfect plan for getting rid of him," his mother said smiling at her husband sweetly. He gave her an air kiss in reply.
Lily took a bite of the food and grimaced. She spit her food out on the plate. Looking at her mother, she said, "I think your days of planning have come to an end. This food is going to kill us all."
"Huh?" her mother said.
His father took a taste of the cabbage and shook his head. He tried to swallow it, but with little success. He spit it out in his napkin. With a little more enthusiasm than was probably healthy for a good subservient husband, he said, "She's right. This is perfectly horrible."
"What?" his mother asked. She looked at Sean to see his reaction to the meal.
Sean threw his hands up in the air and said, "I am not going to taste it until after you try it."
His mother took a bite of the dish and grimaced. She managed to force it down. Pasting a false smile on her face, she said, "That's pretty good. Try some, Sean."
"You're not fooling me," Sean said pushing his plate away.
While poking the cabbages with his fork, his father said, "I think the tomato juice must have gone bad or something."
His mother looked a little embarrassed. She said, "I may have tried a little variation in the recipe."
"Like what?" Lily asked.
"It is all Sean's fault," his mother said pointing at Sean with her thumb and ignoring Lily's question.
"My fault?" Sean asked looking stunned by the charge. He looked around the table and asked, "How was it my fault? What did I do?"
His father asked, "What did he do?"
"He's been doing the shopping for so long that I had a few problems at the grocery store," his mother answered.
"Huh?" Sean asked with a puzzled expression on his face. He said, "You were the one sending me to the store."
Not deterred by her mother's avoidance of her question, Lily asked, "What kind of variation did you try?"
Looking rather embarrassed, his mother answered, "I may have used Clamato juice instead of tomato juice."
Sean laughed and said, "That's the tomato juice with clam juice in it."
"Clam juice and cabbage?" Lily asked staring at the food on her plate. She couldn't imagine anyone thinking that it would be a good combination.
Sean's father laughed out loud and said, "That's disgusting."
"It sounds like a toxic brew to me," Sean said with a grin.
"Hey, it looked like tomato juice," Sean's mother said. She had been a little overwhelmed by the variety of items at the grocery store. She said, "It is all Sean's fault."
"My fault?" Sean asked again.
"Yes, it is all your fault and you must be punished," his mother said.
Knocking on the table, Sean said, "I demand a trial."
His father said, "So noted. The accused has requested a trial."
Rising from her chair, Lily said, "All rise for Judge Dad!"
Everyone stood until Sean's father said, "You may be seated."
Everyone took a seat. Rubbing her hands together excitedly, Lily said, "This is going to be good."
Sean's father asked, "Sean, do you want representation?"
"No, Judge Dad."
Lily rolled her eyes and said, "That's a big mistake."
"So noted," his father said. He turned to look at his wife and said, "Would the prosecutor please state the charges against the defendant?"
Sean's mother pointed a finger a Sean and said, "The defendant did knowingly create tonight's meal disaster."
"How does the accused plead?" Judge Dad asked while looking at Sean.
"Not guilty," Sean answered.
"So noted. The accused pleads not guilty to the heinous crime of ruining tonight's dinner. Will the prosecutor state her case against the defendant?"
"The defendant undertook numerous trips to the store over the past few years. He did so for the express purpose of leading his poor mother into a state of confusion when she finally went shopping," his mother said.
"How did he do that?" Judge Dad asked.
"By preventing me from going to the store for such a long period of time, I was faced with a variety of unfamiliar goods when I finally went grocery shopping. Bewildered by the vast array of similar products, it was inevitable that I would err and chose the wrong item. That lead to this disastrous dinner," his mother said trying to look like a pitiful victim.
"That is very serious matter. You are saying that he intentionally confused you."
"That is correct."
Lily looked over at Sean and said, "Your goose is cooked. She's using the child confused the parent attack. You better come up with a good defense."
Sean's father turned to look at Sean and asked, "What does the accused have to say in his defense?"
"I did no such thing," Sean answered.
Lily laughed and said, "That's a real good defense. You'll hang for sure. It is not too late to request a lawyer."
Deciding that his sister was probably right, Sean said, "I request a lawyer."
Raising her hand, Lily said, "I volunteer to be his lawyer."
Smiling, his mother raised her hand and said, "I should be his lawyer. With my greater experience, I'll be able to mount a much better defense on his behalf."
"I object! She can't do that. She's the prosecutor," Sean said pointing at his mother. He had fallen for that trick once when he was a lot smaller.
"Objection sustained," Judge Dad said. He looked over at his wife and shook a finger at her while he said, "That was very sneaky. He could have actually fallen for it."
"I'll have attorney Lily defend me," Sean said.
"So noted," Sean's father said. He looked at Lily and said, "Present the defense for your client, attorney Lily."
Lily said, "He's not smart enough to create such a twisted plan."
"Hey," Sean said.
"That is a much better defense," Sean's father said.
"Thank you," Lily said taking a bow.
Sean's mother said, "A pretense of stupidity is not a defense. Even a broken clock is right twice a day."
Upon hearing the broken clock argument, Lily said, "Oh no. This really looks bad for you, Sean."
"I agree," Sean said. Shaking his head, he said, "I've never won against the broken clock argument."
Judge Dad asked, "Does the defense have any further arguments?"
"The defense rests, Judge Dad," Lily said.
Sean looked at his father and asked, "What's the verdict?"
"Guilty as charged," his father answered with a grin.
"What's my punishment?" Sean asked.
His father answered, "You have to choose the restaurant we eat at tonight."
"That's a horrible punishment," Sean said trying to look miserable.
Sean's mother said, "He's getting off too easy."
"There are only two restaurants in town," Lily said. "It is either surf and turf or the diner."
"Hmm, tough choice," Sean's father said knowing what Sean was going to pick.
Sean said, "Since clams are the subject of today's disaster, there's only one reasonable choice."
"Surf and turf," Lily shouted.
"That's right," Sean said with a grin.
"So noted," Judge Dad said while knocking on the table. Rising from his seat, he said, "Let's head over to the Surf and Turf."