Day 230 Monday
Denise arrived home from work and stripped out of her clothes. Victoria was seated on a chair in the living room watching television. She looked like a beached whale and about as lively as road kill. Denise looked around the room and said, "The house is a mess. Did you do any cleaning today?"
"No," Victoria answered.
"Why not?" Denise asked getting angry. Victoria was fighting the program in ways that she had never considered. One of them was by doing absolutely none of the housework.
"Why should I?" Victoria answered.
"You might consider the fact that you live here and should contribute to keeping the house clean. You might consider the fact that you have nothing else to do while Dale and I have jobs to go to," Denise said. She knew that Victoria had a very light schedule at college and had nothing better to do.
"So," Victoria said.
Frustrated, Denise said, "For one, you don't want to piss me off. For another, you don't want to play that game with Dale because you'll lose big time."
"You're just his whore," Victoria said.
"I'm in the program just like you, but I've learned some things. Right now, I'm the only one you know who has gone through what you're going through. If you piss me off then I might not help you," Denise said.
"Big deal," Victoria said crossing her arms and turning her back to Denise.
"Do you want my help?" Denise asked.
"No. I'd prefer it if you would just fuck off," Victoria answered.
Denise looked at Victoria and came to a major decision. She said, "So be it."
Later that night, Dale told Victoria that he wanted her to come into his office for one of his long talks. He gave her ten minutes to prepare for the meeting. Victoria was drinking a large glass of iced tea and watching the television. Smiling, Denise asked, "Would you like a refill?"
"Sure," Victoria said as if addressing a servant.
Denise went to the kitchen and grabbed the pitcher of ice tea. She carried it into the living room and refilled Victoria's glass. Victoria didn't bother to thank her, but just took a sip of the tea.
Smiling, Denise asked, "Is that good?"
"It is okay," Victoria answered.
"I'm sorry it isn't up to your high standards," Denise said watching Victoria take another drink.
Denise went into Dale's office and whispered in his ear, "She hasn't gone to the bathroom and she's drinking iced tea."
"Thanks for the warning," Dale said. He said, "I'll send her there before we start."
"Don't," Denise said.
"Why?"
"Make her piss herself," Denise said.
"My carpet will get ruined," Dale said.
"Have her stand on a pile of towels rather than in the circle," Denise said.
Dale studied Denise for a minute trying to figure out her motivation. He asked, "Why?"
"She needs it," Denise answered. She looked Dale in the eye and said, "I want to watch."
"My meetings are private," Dale said.
"Okay," Denise said, "but call me in after she pisses herself."
"Why?"
"Just do it. She needs it," Denise answered. She could see that he wasn't convinced. She said, "Please."
"Okay," Dale said.
"Yell at me for not warning her," Denise said just before leaving the room.
Dale watched Denise go and smiled. She was growing. She was learning that what people often needed wasn't kindness, but a good kick in the ass. It was one of the hardest lessons to teach someone.
Denise came back to the office and handed him a stack of towels. She said, "We're out of clean towels except for what is in our bathrooms. Someone will have to do the laundry tomorrow."
"Yes," Dale said. He leaned out the door and shouted, "Victoria. Get in here now."
As Victoria walked past Denise, she said, "My empty glass is in the living room. You can take care of it now."
"I've taken care of everything," Denise replied.
"That's a good little servant whore," Victoria said. If she was going to be treated badly, then she was going to treat everyone even worse.
"Dale's waiting for you," Denise said with a smile.
"He can wait," Victoria said.
Rather than answer, Denise watched Victoria go into the study. The door closed and she went into the living room to wait. She glanced over at the empty glass and smiled. She didn't think she'd have to wait for long.
The wait was only twenty minutes before she heard Dale yell, "Get in here Denise!"
Denise ran to the study and entered. The towels under Victoria were soaked and the woman was crying rivers of tears. She asked, "What do you want Dale?"
"Why didn't you warn her about going to the bathroom before the meeting?" Dale asked crossing his arms and looking angry.
"She quite clearly said that she doesn't want my help," Denise answered.
"She doesn't?" Dale asked with a smile. He had figured that was the case.
"No, Sir. She doesn't. I told her that I could help her, but she told me that she didn't want it," Denise said.
"Bitch," Victoria said, "You knew this was going to happen."
"Of course, I did. I could have warned you, but why should the servant whore help you? I can't think of a single reason," Denise said.
"You made me piss myself," Victoria shouted.
"No she didn't. You pissed yourself because you took a shit on the one person who can help you through the program," Dale said. His eyes narrowed and he said, "You have to live with the consequences of your actions. You can't blame others after you reject their offers of help. You can't blame others when you are the one that pisses on yourself."
"It's her fault," Victoria said knowing that she had no real defense.
Leaning forward and looking Victoria in the eye, Dale said, "Let me tell you what happens to fat women.
"Fat women don't live happy lives. They are miserable and they make everyone around them miserable. The good news is that they don't live long so their misery is of relatively short duration.
"You are a fat woman. You already know that your life is miserable. I've got a feeling that you're the type of fat woman who ends up at five or six hundred pounds. Twenty one years old and you are already sixty pounds overweight. At twenty-five, you'll be a hundred pounds overweight. It'll only get worse.
"You think you're miserable now. Just wait until you weigh in at four hundred pounds. You'll be unable to make your way to the bathroom, because you aren't strong enough to lift your body off the bed. You will end up pissing and shitting in a diaper that you might be able to change yourself. When you get sick, they're going to have to come in with special equipment to cut open a wider door so that they can get you out and to a hospital. It'll take six people to lift you out of your bed.
"You know that is the future that awaits you. You know that you'll end up the giant fat woman who gets news coverage because you're so fat that you have no life. You think that walking around here naked is embarrassing. I've got news for you. It is nothing compared to getting your picture pasted across the national news because you're a fat woman."
Victoria was sobbing. Dale had just described the future that she had nightmares about. She hadn't told him that she had been on a diet before this in which she had lost forty pounds and had already gained twenty of them back. She hadn't mentioned that her doctor had warned her that she was on the verge of getting diabetes.
Denise said, "Victoria, you are offensive because it is easier than being defensive. You strike out at people before they can say mean and nasty things to you. You are ashamed of yourself and use that shame to hurt others.
"You've grown up with schoolyard taunts about being a whale. I know what you have gone through. I've been there. I've listened to the boys say things like fucking me should count as fucking five girls because I'm as big as five girls. I've heard every insult there is that can be aimed at a fat woman because I was a fat woman for a lot longer than you have been one.
"Your problem is that you believed the insults. You accepted what they said and it turned you into a bitter angry person. It is time for you to put that past behind you."
Victoria hadn't stopped crying. She knew the insults. She knew the jokes made about her size. She recognized herself in everything that Denise was saying. She said, "I'm so tired of it all."
Dale said, "Then end it."
"How?" Victoria asked.
Dale answered, "Your only hope of salvation is this program. Look at the monitor on my desk. You'll see what will happen if you stay in the program."
Victoria looked at the monitor. Dale showed the time-lapse video he had created documenting the time Susan spent in the program. He let it loop while he turned back to talk to Victoria. He said, "That is the last woman who graduated the program after entering it as a fat woman. Look at her. She's gorgeous. She could grace the cover of a national magazine, yet at one time she was just a fat woman like you. Look at it. Imagine that is you. If you want to leave here fat, then go now. If you want to leave here looking like a model, then get with the program."
"I want to look like that," Victoria said unable to take her eyes off of the video.
Dale turned away and started a different video. This one was of Denise. He said, "She was a fat woman, but now she's not."
Victoria stared at the video unable to believe how Denise once looked. She looked over at her and said, "You were fat."
"Yes, I was," Denise said, "I'm not fat now."
Dale said, "You have a choice to make, Victoria. You can go through life as a fat woman or you can change. It is up to you. I'll guide you through the process. Denise will give you advice. If you don't want to listen to us, you might as well leave now."
"I want to be thin," Victoria said.
"What will you do to be thin?" Dale asked.
"Anything," Victoria answered.
"I'll tell you what you are going to do. You are going to take that stack of towels down to the basement and use them as your bed tonight. You pissed in your nest, now you need to sleep in it. In the morning, you are going to wash all of the dirty towels, you are going to clean the house, and you are going to cook dinner," Dale said.
"Yes, sir," Victoria said crying.
Dale noticed that Victoria was already rocking in place. He could tell that the woman already needed to use the toilet again. Shaking his head, he said, "You might as well squat and empty the rest of your bladder. We've got a lot to discuss."
Denise watched as Victoria squatted over the towels and let loose with a stream of urine. She couldn't imagine anything more degrading that having to do that in front of two people. Victoria had returned to crying as the towels got even wetter beneath her. She had never done anything so humiliating in her life.
When Victoria finished, Dale said, "Denise, you can leave now."
"Yes, sir," Denise said backing out of the room.
In the living room, Denise picked up the empty glass and carried it into the kitchen. She set it on the counter thinking that there was no reason to be petty. She sat down at the table wanting to cry in sympathy for the young woman. It had been a hard lesson for Victoria, but it was a necessary lesson. That didn't make teaching it any easier. She felt dirty.
Two hours later, Victoria walked past her on her way to the basement. The stack of towels she carried with her were soaking wet. Victoria didn't say a word.
Denise watched her go knowing that they'd start their exercise program in a few minutes. Dale stopped and asked, "Is that what you wanted?"
"No. It was what she needed," Denise said.
"You're right," Dale said. He shook his head and said, "I'm going to order new carpet tomorrow. It has been more than a year since I last replaced it."
"Ah," Denise said.
Dale asked, "How did you know that I'd be able to keep her there?"
"I have confidence in you," Denise answered. It had never dawned on her that he wouldn't keep her there.
Dale shook his head and said, "She's not the first one who has done that."
"I didn't think so," Denise said.
"Don't rub it in," Dale said.
"I won't."
Dale looked at Denise for a few seconds and then asked, "Did you cry afterwards?"
"I wanted to," Denise answered.
Dale said, "I have a tranquility room in the private part of the house. Sometimes, I go in there because I'm too down about the things I have to do. I think that is what keeps me from becoming a monster. Some things should remain hard to do."
"Thank you," Denise said feeling better about the matter.
"Let's get downstairs," Dale said gesturing towards the basement. He said, "I'm going to just fuck her. Having her touch me is just too painful."
Denise looked at Dale and said, "Was I that bad?"
"Close," Dale said opting for his usual blunt honesty.
"I'm sorry," Denise said.
"That was a different person," Dale said shrugging his shoulders.
"I guess," she replied. It was actually pretty easy to divide her life into two parts; one from when she was a fat woman and this one. She had a feeling that by the time she finished the program, she'd have to divide her life into three parts: before, during, and after the program. She hoped that the after part of her life would be the best.
In the basement, Dale said, "Victoria, start your exercises."
Denise watched as Victoria did two of each exercise. She remembered when the workouts had been easy. Now, her workouts left her feeling pretty exhausted. When Victoria finished her exercise program, Denise started hers. She was in the middle of her sit ups when she heard the unmistakable sounds of Dale having sex. She glanced over at the closet and saw that Victoria's ass was sticking out.
The reminder of how it had been to be treated in that manner caused her to falter. Having seen Victoria's face during the previous sexual encounters with Dale left her feeling sick. Dale was right about not wanting to look at a fat woman while he was having sex with her. She understood it from both sides now. Dale had made a bargain and he was living up to his end of it. Victoria felt as if she was being emotionally raped.
Denise wondered if she was actually experiencing the Stockholm syndrome. Lots of victims of kidnappers ended up empathizing with their captors. She shook her head at the idea. The fact was that she was a thousand times happier and more confident than ever before. Her life had changed for the better and those miserable five months of coerced sex had played a key factor in it.
It was difficult to understand just how well Dale understood people. He seemed to know exactly what they needed in order to change and grow. She realized the magnitude of the task he had undertaken. Trying to change the habits, mindset, and conditioning of a lifetime in less than a year and a half was a major challenge. His methods were at times brutal and forced the individual to re-examine everything they believed. She knew that from experience.
Dale finished before Denise had finished her exercise program. She had just gotten on the treadmill when he came over. Smiling, he said, "That was a little better."
"Good," Denise said starting her run slowly.
Dale looked over at Victoria. She was still bent over with half of her body in the closet. By the way her body was shaking, it was obvious that she was crying. He watched her for a moment and then said, "Take a few minutes to talk to her after I've taken her picture."
"Sure," Denise said. She had planned on doing that anyway. This was his first time to have sex with Victoria after the disastrous attempt at a hand job on Victoria's first day in the program. She asked, "Was she a virgin?"
"No. She had a rather bad experience in the backseat of a car when she was a teenager. She thought it was true love and he was thinking about it as a chance to get his rocks off knowing that he'd never be able to brag about shagging a fat girl," Dale answered. He shook his head and said, "She may think that I'm cruel, but she's been surrounded by cruel people her entire life. It is no wonder that she's insane."
"Insane?" Denise asked.
"You know, irrational," Dale answered.
Concerned that she was going to be living with a crazy person, Denise asked, "She's insane?"
"Don't look surprised. You were insane when you were a fat woman," Dale said.
"Why do you say that?"
Dale held out his hand and, folding his fingers with each point made, said, "You were definitely paranoid. You were Narcissistic, although in a very negative way. You had a view of reality that was warped in terms of believing that everyone else's life was a garden party while your life was one of misery. You were socially stunted in that you didn't know how to relate to the people around you. You were sexually inhibited to the point of frigidity."
"Oh," Denise said coming to a stop on the treadmill.
"Five strikes and you're insane," Dale said looking at her.
"Oh," Denise said feeling a little sick to her stomach.
Seeing the expression on her face, Dale said, "Don't worry. You're well on your way to recovery. Your paranoia has abated. Your Narcissistic tendencies have stopped dominating your life. You've started to look at people in a much more realistic manner. You've learned to deal with people from a much more honest base. Finally, you've lost your sexual inhibitions to the point where you can actively enjoy sex."
"Wow, I hadn't thought about that," Denise said. She looked over at Victoria and asked, "So there's hope for her."
"Of course," Dale said. He glanced at the clock and said, "Let's get the pictures taken."
"Okay," Denise said realizing that she hadn't finished her run.
It took a few minutes to get Victoria into the proper pose, but Dale finally managed to get her picture. The woman tended to slouch and that would ruin the time-elapse video. Denise was done in almost no time. Dale looked at the two women and then said, "I'll see you in the morning."
"Good night, Dale," Denise said.
Victoria stared at the floor where the pile of wet towels was located. She didn't bother saying a word to Dale. Denise watched Dale leave the basement noticing that he walked as though he had a back ache. Under her breath, she said, "It looks to me like he could use a piece of Candy right about now."
Victoria looked up and asked, "What did you say?"
"I was just thinking something out loud," Denise answered with a sigh. She went over and sat on the bed.
"I'm not going to get any sleep tonight," Victoria said. She shook her head and pointed to the towels. She added, "I can't believe he expects me to sleep on them."
"I can," Denise said. Sometimes harsh measures were required to break through thick emotional barriers. Dale never shied away from using harsh measures when they were called for.
"I hate him," Victoria said.
"You say that now, but you'll see it differently as time goes by," Denise said. She remembered having a conversation like this a long time ago.
"You love him," Victoria said.
Denise laughed at the assertion and said, "No. I don't love him. I've come to respect him very much."
"You seem to take a lot of pleasure in fucking him," Victoria said.
Denise smiled and said, "I'm fucking him because I've discovered that I enjoy fucking. I've got a real boyfriend."
"And you are still having sex with Dale?"
Knowing how it sounded, Denise nodded her head and said, "Yes."
"You're a slut," Victoria said.
"Not really, but I doubt that I'll be able to convince you otherwise," Denise said.
Victoria was silent as she stared at the pile of towels. Although it hurt to admit it, she knew that Denise had probably been justified in not warning her about using the bathroom before the meeting with Dale. She said, "I'm sorry."
"Don't worry about it. Just remember that I'm here to help you," Denise said.
"I don't see how. You haven't kept him from raping me," Victoria said.
"He isn't raping you. You agreed to do that and he's holding you to your word. It is consensual sex, not rape," Denise said. She remembered Susan telling her exactly the same thing.
"It sure as hell doesn't feel consensual," Victoria said.
Nodding her head, Denise said, "I know. I've been there and I've felt exactly the same way that you do."
"You were pretty fat when you entered the program," Victoria said realizing that Denise was telling her the truth. It was hard to believe that the fat woman of the video had trimmed down to the extent that Denise had achieved.
"Yes, I was, but I'm not a fat woman anymore."
"You're still fat," Victoria said. Denise might have lost a lot of weight, but she wasn't skinny.
Shaking her head, Denise answered, "I'm overweight. There's a difference."