Magus clicked his pen in staccato bursts while waiting for his visitor to reply. The pen produced a very irritating sound that appeared to distract the young man. Getting tired of waiting for an answer, Magus said, "If you cannot afford my fee, I must ask that you leave."
"I'm sorry. I just don't have ten dollars," the young man said. He did his best to look miserable in the hope that Magus would let him pay for his services at a later date. One glance at Magus let him know that it wasn't working.
"I'm sorry, too," Magus said.
"I'm really desperate."
"Too bad. Now go."
"Can't we work something out?"
Magus answered, "No."
The young man rose and shuffled towards the office door. Magus said, "There's a guy by the name of Phil in the office next to ours — Paladin Incorporated. I heard him talking the other day about how poorly his computer is performing. You might go over there and see if you can be of help."
"Thanks," the young man said. It didn't dawn on him to wonder how Magus knew that he could help someone with computer problems.
Magus waited until he heard the front door close before he shouted, "Claudia. Call Igor and tell him to boot up that piece of crap computer he has over in his office. He's going to have company any minute now."
"Your bellow is my command," Claudia said while reaching for the phone.
"Just keep remembering that and we'll get along fine," Magus said. He ignored Claudia's heckling laughter.
Discouraged by his visit to Solutions Incorporated, Jake was ready to head back to campus. He wondered why his professor recommended that he visit that place anyway. If it wasn't for bad luck; he would have no luck at all. At the last minute, he decided to check out the company that Magus had suggested. He returned down the hallway checking the signs on the doors.
Not quite believing his eyes, Jake stared at the door of Paladin Incorporated. He stepped back and looked at the doors of the other offices along the hallway. The other doors were standard office doors. None of them looked like they had come off the vault of a bank. He looked at the monster dial and wondered what the combination was to unlock the door. He knocked on the door while mumbling, "I guess they take their security seriously."
He tried knocking on the door a second time. He could barely hear it. He was about to give up when he noticed a plate affixed to the wall three feet from the door. Across the top of the plate were the words, Paladin Incorporated. The metal plate had a small lens near the top, four small holes in the middle, and a button near the bottom. Below the button were the words, Press Button. He pressed the button and waited for something to happen.
"Who is it?"
Jake stared at the metal plate. Finally, he answered, "Jake Dunhill."
"You can enter," was announced over the speaker.
Jake looked over at the huge door. It started swinging open. He muttered, "That's a really big assed door."
Jake walked over to the open door and watched as the door continued to swing inwards to the office. There was a metal desk with a very large man seated behind it. He stepped into the office. The man stared at him for a second and then in a gravelly voice asked, "What do you want?"
"I heard that you had a computer problem. I know a bit about computers," Jake answered intimidated by the large man. Childhood memories of getting stuffed in trashcans by members of the football team came rushing back.
"Where did you hear about my computer problems?" the man asked. His question sounded like an accusation.
"I heard it from the guy over in Solutions Incorporated. He said he heard it from Phil."
"I'm Phil. I guess you heard it from Magus," the man said. He sat there and growled for a second. He said, "I'll pay you ten dollars if you can tell me what is wrong with it."
"Okay," Jake said. "Where is it?"
Easing out from behind the desk, Phil answered, "It is under the desk here."
Jake went behind the desk and looked at the computer. He got down on his knees to better examine it. He frowned upon seeing the two slots for old five and a quarter inch floppy diskettes. He examined the slots a little more carefully. It looked like someone had shoved a cd inside one of them. The hard drive was making a weird squealing sound that was remarkably similar to a Jimmy Hendrix song. Something, he didn't know what, was making a clanging sound inside the case.
He then looked over at the monitor. It took him a second to realize why the image on the monitor looked odd. The top half of the screen was at the bottom of the display and the bottom half was at the top. It wasn't that the image was upside down either. He stabbed a couple of keys on the keyboard but nothing happened. He moved the mouse and watched the arrow move across the screen long after he had let go of the mouse. The letters that he had typed earlier finally showed up on the screen.
Phil asked, "So what's the verdict?"
Standing up, Jake said, "There's only one thing wrong with it."
"What's that?" Phil asked.
"It is a piece of garbage," Jake said.
"Can it be fixed?"
Jake said, "Easily."
"How?" Phil asked.
"Just replace everything on this side of the electrical socket," Jake answered.
Phil laughed and said, "Okay. I get the picture. I should just throw it out and get a new one."
"Got it in one," Jake said.
Phil pulled out a ten dollar bill and said, "I said that I would pay you ten dollars if you could tell me what was wrong with it. I guess you did. Here you go."
"Thanks," Jake said taking the ten dollar bill. Hoping that he could earn some more money, he asked, "What are you going to do about replacing it?"
"I'll keep using it," Phil answered. He grinned at the expression on Jake's face. "I figure it has a few good years left in it."
Jake looked at the computer and shivered in disgust at the idea of using it for anything except perhaps a boat anchor.
Jake took the receipt from Magus and then asked, "So are you ready to hear my problem now?"
"Of course," Magus answered.
"I'm broke and I can't afford to continue going to school," Jake said.
"You've considered student loans?" Magus asked.
"I have already borrowed money from a bank and I can't get another loan. My parents took a second mortgage against their house. Even if I could get another loan, it won't cover all of the expenses of going to school," Jake answered.
"What other expenses do you have beside tuition and books?" Magus asked.
Jake answered, "Look at my clothes. I look like a homeless bum. I've got two pairs of pants left and I've had them for four years. You can see my underwear through the holes that I've worn out in them. I've got four tee-shirts, one of which is ripped. A student loan won't pay for new clothes."
"What about asking your parents for a bit of spending money?" Magus asked.
"My dad lost his job. They are about to lose their house because of the second mortgage that they had to take out on it to pay for my education so far," Jake said.
"Scholarships?"
"I haven't found one."
"Grants."
"I haven't found one of those either."
"How about a job?" Magus asked.
"I haven't been able to get past the first interview. I don't exactly present a stellar image with my ass hanging out the back of my pants or my toes showing through the tops of my shoes," Jake answered.
Magus nodded his head thoughtfully. He asked, "What does the school financial aid office say?"
"They've done all they can for me," Jake said.
Magus said, "I guess the only thing you can do is drop out of school."
"I can't do that."
"Why not?"
"I can't afford to leave school," Jake said.
"Why?"
"I won't have a degree if I drop out. Once I leave school I'll have to start paying back my loan. Knowing my luck, the only job I'll be able to get is picking up dog poop in the park. I'll have to declare bankruptcy because I won't be able to pay back the loan that I took out," Jake said in disgust. His job prospects probably weren't as bad as that, but it felt like it.
Magus said, "I guess the only solution is to get a job and go to school part time."
"Probably, but who would hire me?" Jake asked.
"Your grades are not that good?" Magus asked.
"I have a 4.0 in my major, but a 3.6 overall," Jake answered. He really hated the general education requirements. He actually got an F in music appreciation. It had been a very inopportune time to discover that he was completely tone deaf and couldn't tell one melody from another.
"You are a computer science major," Magus said absently. "I'm sure that there are a lot of small companies around that would hire you despite your lack of a college degree. You might be the only one they could afford."
Jake frowned. He said, "I never told you my major."
"Quite frankly, you haven't told me one thing that I didn't already know about you, Mr. Jake Dunhill of Detroit Michigan. You haven't even told me all of the money issues faced by your family," Magus said.
"What do you mean?"
Magus answered, "You haven't said a word about the fact that your mother is ill and has been for quite a while."
"You know about that?" Jake asked. He was shocked and a little overwhelmed by how much Magus knew about his situation.
"You haven't mentioned the seriousness of your money problems to your father. He's under the impression that you have a little income from a part-time job in the area," Magus said.
This was really getting scary. The only way that Magus could have known that was to have talked to his father. He said, "The company closed last year because of the economy. I can't ask my dad to choose between paying for my education and paying my mom's medical bills."
Magus said, "I was informed that your grades have fallen this semester. I assume that is because you are worried about your money problems."
"I can handle my grades once I deal with the money problem," Jake said feeling a little defensive. He thought about what Magus had been saying. Things didn't add up. He asked, "How do you know all of that?"
"You don't think that your professor mentioned giving me a call by accident, do you?"
"I didn't think about that," Jake answered.
"To tell the truth, I was expecting you to call yesterday," Magus said.
"I have a paper due tomorrow and I worked on it all day yesterday," Jake said.
"For your microeconomics course?" Magus asked.
"Yes," Jake said.
Magus said, "That makes sense. She was the only one of your professors that I couldn't reach when I was doing my background investigation on you."
"Background investigation?" Jake asked. This entire conversation represented a serious invasion of privacy.
Ignoring the question, Magus slid an envelope across the desk. He said, "The solution to your problem is in the envelope. You'll find a check for five hundred dollars. The very first thing you should do is to buy yourself some new clothes."
"Any special kind of clothes?" Jake asked. This whole visit didn't make sense to him. The guy demanded ten dollars before he would help him and then turned around and gave him five hundred dollars.
"Just the kind of clothes you would wear every day. There is also the address of a house in there. You'll want to move into it this weekend."
"I already have a place to live," Jake said.
"You can't really afford to live in a dorm. The room you will be moving into is rent free for reasons that I will explain later. You'll be sharing the house with Stephen. He's a freshman at Harvard. I expect two more people will move in soon," Magus said.
"Free?" Jake said.
"I want you to spend the next week getting your grade up in your advanced data structures course. You will want to drop two of your courses. I've identified which two classes you should drop on one of the papers in the envelope."
"I don't want to drop any classes. I've already paid for them," Jake said.
Magus said, "In ten days you'll start your new job. You'll be working thirty hours a week and, quite frankly, you won't have the time to carry a full load at the university. You'll have a salary of twenty-four thousand a year until you graduate. Among the benefits are health insurance, tuition reimbursement, a book allowance, and a room in our corporate housing."
"Those are pretty good benefits," Jake said. "Where will I be working and what will I be doing?"
"You'll be working for Paladin Incorporated installing and maintaining the new computing infrastructure that I am purchasing. Phil will be your boss," Magus said.
"You mean I'll be working for that big scary-looking paranoid guy whose office is behind a door that belongs on a bank vault?" Jake asked.
"Yes," Magus said.
"I hope he doesn't expect me to use that garbage computer that I looked at when I was over there," Jake said.
Magus laughed at the suggestion that anyone would actually use that computer. He said, "Don't worry about that computer. That was your job interview. Phil doesn't like people who try to blow smoke up his ass or try to confuse him with technical bullshit. He much prefers people who tell it like it is."
"Do you own Paladin Incorporated?"
"Yes I do," Magus said.
Jake said, "In other words, I will be working for you."
"Exactly. I should warn you that I will fire you if you drop out of school before completing your degree," Magus said.
"No problem. I intend to graduate," Jake said. Magus' condition on employment didn't sound like a negative to him.
"Excellent," Magus said. "There is one last condition on your employment."
"What?"
"I get to call you Poindexter," Magus answered.
"Poindexter?" Jake asked.
"It sounds smarter," Magus said.
"Okay," Jake said. There could have been a weirder condition but it would be hard to find it.
"Any questions?"
"Yeah. What was that whole bit with me going next door to earn some money?" Jake asked.
"I won't help someone who doesn't pay me. You didn't have any money so you had to earn it," Magus said.
"But you paid me the money so that I could pay you."
"So?"
"That doesn't seem weird to you?" Jake asked.
"Not at all," Magus answered. "There is a principle involved."