Tay

(b/b, mast, oral)

Like everyone else, I wanted to be around him all the time. Taylor, Tay for short, was quite simply the coolest and most popular kid in my year at school. He was golden haired, blue eyed, so attractive, funny and warm-hearted. I wanted to be near him so hard that it hurt when I wasn’t. And that was most of the time, to be fair. I wasn’t popular, not all that unpopular either, just ordinary. I had a few friends, none of whom considered me to be their best friend. I did well enough at my school work, a little above average, but not top of the class. I was ok at sports, quite good at cross country running, but not an all-round sports star. In a word, I was invisible. Especially to Tay.

An American kid, he was in the UK because his English father had to return to find work, and dragged his family across the Atlantic with him. He was the only American I knew, the only American most of the kids at school had ever encountered. There was something terribly exotic about that. At twelve going on thirteen, we were still enraptured with the American dream, long before the cynicism of later years sets in and you realise the dream is elsewhere. Tay was part of that, an exciting figure in the dull landscape of our lives. He had longer hair than most of the girls, somehow getting away with it despite the school rules to the contrary. He was a skater, his board never far away, though he had been asked not to skate within the school grounds. Of course, he obliged, but behind the teachers’ backs he made sure we knew that he objected, and we loved him all the more for it.

I didn’t think it was a crush at first. Not for a long time, in fact. I just wanted to be his friend, because being Tay’s friend was the best thing in the world when I was twelve. He had a few close friends, picked for various reasons, but mostly because they all skated, like he did. I would see them hanging around in town sometimes, rolling around, occasionally attempting some trick or other. I would say hi, and they would respond, but it was nothing more than that, nothing more than a passing greeting. I never stayed more than a moment, I was always running away from them because I was so nervous around Tay. I hated myself for it, but there was nothing I could do. There was no reason for Tay to be my friend, and I couldn’t see him ever wanting to be.

Life for me was built on routine, on doing certain things at certain times. My father worked long hours, and my mother as a nurse, doing crazy shift patterns. That left me alone in the house for a lot of the time, especially when my mum was doing the afternoon and evening shift, and my dad was away working, which was about one week in three. I ate defrosted and reheated meals that my mum made in huge batches, eating at 6 every evening. That was when dinner was, to my mind, and so that’s when I ate it. Bedtime was fluid, but I always made sure I got to bed before midnight – after all, I had to be up at half past seven in the morning, and didn’t want to be too tired for school. I didn’t have any brothers or sisters, so I soon got used to my own company. I had a babysitter up until the age of eleven, but after that my parents considered me mature enough to look after myself. When he was in the country, dad would get home at about 9 in the evening, and we would spend a little time together watching TV and chatting about nothing much. Dad and I had a great relationship, when he was actually about to see me. Actually, when I reached about 16 my dad got tired of his job and jacked it all in to become a consultant, working from home, and we discovered that we had a lot more in common than either of us had thought. I sometimes wonder what it would have been like to have him there all the time. But you can’t go over everything with a fine toothed comb and wonder what would have been, otherwise you’ll never live in the present. Mum usually got home after I went to bed, but she always made sure she was up to see me before I went to school.

School helped with the routine a lot, because there was nothing for it but to conform. The uniform made everyone look the same. Well, except for Tay, of course. Just the way he wore it looked like he had his own uniform. Anyone copying him was immediately told to smarten up, but Tay must have had the same effect on the teachers as he did on us, because they let him get away with it every time. Occasionally one of them would say something, but it was always half-hearted, and there was no bite behind the bark. Lunchtime was easy to get through, if not exactly exciting. All my friends loved football, and I always joined them for a kickabout, even though I was far from the best player. From time to time I would have a good game, and would receive the deserved credit, but I was off the boil more often than I was on my game.

It never really occurred to me, but my life was limping along. I was surviving from day to day, but I really wasn’t living in any real sense. I was a twelve year old boy and I never went out and had fun. It only took one science project to change that forever.
I liked our combined science classes. There was a great mix of chemistry, physics and biology to be learned, and it was one area where I actually seemed to have an ounce of genuine talent. Something about science awoke in me the desire to learn, and I did my best. Every term we had a long-haul project to get through, each discipline having a term dedicated to it. This particular year, the autumn term was to be dedicated to a physics project, which would have to be researched and presented to the rest of the class. The teacher had a list of suggestions, but we were more than welcome to come up with an idea of our own, as long as it was approved. I’d been thinking about an idea ever since it was announced we were going to be dealing with physics. I was a keen amateur astronomer, and had a pretty decent telescope of my own. I’d been following the moons around Jupiter for a while, and thought it would be quite cool to perform a study of them for the project. I knew of Galileo’s experiments many hundreds of years prior to my own interest, and wanted to repeat them. Astronomy projects fell into the scope of the physics remit, so I knew I would get approval. The only problem, and it was a big problem, was finding someone to do it with. We were required to research the projects in pairs, and that always left me with a problem. I didn’t think anyone else in the class would want to have anything to do with my project when it came to dividing ourselves up. It was a lot more work than most of the projects were going to involve, and very few of my classmates wanted to do anything more than they absolutely had to.
It came as a bit of a shock, then, when somebody did approach me. The bigger surprise, though, was the fact that of all the people in the class, it was Tay who wanted to do the project with me. My mouth dried up immediately, and I tripped over my words as I tried to explain to him what the project was about. He seemed genuinely interested, his glowing blue eyes boring into mine as I spoke, making my temporary speech impediment even more severe. When I finished explaining to him, having drawn a quick couple of sketches, he astounded me by not walking away immediately, instead saying something insane about wanting to do the project with me, if that was ok.

Hmm, was it ok? Let me think about that for a little while. Errr, yeah, why not, I thought to myself. To Tay, I just nodded. I wasn’t about to trust my stupid mouth to get the words out straight, so I thought non-verbal communication was the way forward. He smiled a kilowatt smile, melting me on the spot, before walking away again. We’d arrange the work at a later date, that became obvious. I didn’t care about times and dates, though, all I cared about was that the coolest boy in my universe actually wanted to do a science project with me.

For the next few days I was walking around with my head in the clouds. My confidence was right up, to the point where my dad noticed a positive upturn in my energy levels in the evening. He asked if everything was ok, whether something special had happened. He even asked whether I had my first girlfriend, a question which shocked me. Yeah, I’d thought about girls, but not like that. Should I have been thinking about girls? I already knew about sex, and I was a regular masturbator by this point, but my fantasies never really involved anyone. I just concentrated on the feelings, and left it at that. Should I have been thinking about girls as I masturbated, should I have been looking for a girl to do it for me? I certainly hadn’t thought about it, and that bothered me a little. I dodged my dad’s questions, just saying that I was having a good week and was excited about the science project, not mentioning Tay once.

When it came to actually doing the work, Tay was a little hesitant. He clearly wasn’t as excited about it as I thought he had been, and I had to bug him to go to the library with me to do the necessary groundwork. Eventually, after a few aborted attempts to get any work done, I had to confront him. I don’t know where I got the confidence from, but it just came out one day when Tay was coming up with yet another excuse not to come around to my house and do the necessary observing with the telescope.

‘Tay, if you don’t want to do the project, stop wasting my time and just say so, ok?’

‘Whoa, sorry. Chill. Look, I’ll level with you. I only chose you ‘cause you’re clever and my dad wants me to do better in class. Sorry, I should have been honest.’

I was furious, and embarrassed, and hurt. I had so wanted to believe that Tay wanted to do the project with me because he liked me or the project, not because he was just using me. I didn’t know what to do, and my confusion turned to anger.

‘Fuck you, Tay,’ I shouted, before storming off. We were outside the school gates, and a fair few people must have heard me swearing like that. I’d rarely said that out loud before, and never at the volume I’d just used. I didn’t look back to see the reaction it caused, just walked away, trying to hold back the tears long enough that no-one would see them fall .Somehow I managed to make it home before the wall broke, though I couldn’t remember the journey, and I fell onto my bed, the tears flowing freely now and my body racked by sobs. I cried and cried, alone in the house. I was glad for that solitude, because I didn’t want anyone to see how badly I’d been hurt by it, to see how vulnerable I really was.

Waking up, I realised that it was morning, not long before dawn. The tears I’d cried the night before had crusted my eyes shut, and I stumbled my way to the bathroom to take a well-needed piss and run a damp washcloth over my eyes. Blinking in the light that I had turned on in the hallway, I made my way into the kitchen and to the fridge. I was ravenous, but couldn’t force myself to actually swallow anything. My throat was just too swollen for that. Instead, I settled for milk, which took away the hunger pains for long enough for me to get back to sleep. It wasn’t good sleep, though, as I tossed and turned in my bed, nightmares racing through my mind. I woke regularly, and thanked God when the morning came and it was late enough for me to get up without causing comment.
I barely said a thing at the breakfast table. It wasn’t unusual for me to be a bit quiet in the morning, so it wasn’t commented on, but inside I was in turmoil. My stomach was leaden as I trudged my way to school. I wasn’t sure what was awaiting me, but I knew it couldn’t be good. I didn’t have a clue how I was going to face Tay after what I’d said to him. It was too harsh, too strong for what he had done. It was my own pain, my embarrassment which had forced those words out of my mouth, and now I regretted my haste. We still had to do the project together, or at least hand something in together, and how were we going to do that after the way I had acted? My heart filled with trepidation, I stepped through the school gates and straight into… well, nothing really. I saw all my usual friends, and they seemed to know nothing of yesterday’s indiscretions. They treated me just like they always did. I saw Tay’s friends, and they were friendly enough to me, no beating me up or anything. Who I didn’t see was Tay. He was nowhere. Not in registration, not in the first few lessons of the day.

By lunchtime I was almost frantic. My mind was running away with the possibilities. He could have got upset by what I said and run off, only to be mown down in traffic. Or maybe he was so upset that he couldn’t come to school and face me. All sorts of other scenarios flitted through my mind as I sat alone eating my lunch. I’d been invited to play football, but I knew there was no way I’d be any use to anyone the way I was feeling. I wanted so badly to throw up, and even made my way to the toilets to try, but nothing would come up. When at last it was time to return for afternoon lessons, I was actually grateful to hear the bell ring.
   
Tormented by the possibilities as I was, I didn’t see him at first. It was the first lesson of the afternoon, English literature. Dull, dull, dull. Well, I thought so at the time, at least. I’ve revised my opinions somewhat since then. Isn’t hindsight a wonderful thing? As I said, head down in my book, hardly listening to what the teacher was saying, I had no real idea of what was going on around me. Eventually, though, I had to move my stiff neck before it seized up entirely. Lifting my head, I flexed my neck a couple of times, and then looked round.

Bang! Right into Taylor’s deep blue eyes. He was in his usual seat, two to my left, and was watching me. As soon as our eyes met, he averted his, looking down at his book. But in that split second when our eyes locked, I had time to gauge his emotion. Where I thought I would have seen anger, hatred, malice there was instead a sad longing. He wasn’t angry with me. He didn’t want to kill me. I couldn’t for the life of me figure out why. I devoted my brain to figuring out the riddle, with the predictable outcome that I wasn’t paying attention when the teacher asked me a question. She was a strict old bat, and because it was clear to her that I wasn’t paying attention, she immediately gave me detention for half an hour after school. It wouldn’t be the first time, I wasn’t that perfect a kid, but out of the corner of my eye I could see Tay wincing a little. When I looked across at him again, he was studying the pages of his book very hard.

Detention was as fun as usual. To be honest, I really couldn’t be bothered to do the homework that it was expected I would do during the time, and instead sat there staring into space. The teacher in charge wasn’t all that worried, as long as I wasn’t messing around making a lot of noise. My mind was still totally occupied by thoughts of Tay. I just couldn’t work out why he wasn’t angry with me. I had acted like a complete idiot, shouting at him because I felt so stupid. It was my problem to deal with. He had never promised lifelong friendship. He only wanted to do the project. Yes, he had been a bit of a slacker, but really I was far too uptight about my schoolwork. It was reasonable to assume that he wasn’t as interested as I was. I shouldn’t have blamed him for that. But I had. I’d blamed him for my own unfulfilled expectations.

Before I’d really had time to get bored, it was over. The half-hour system was mostly there to keep normal kids like me from straying too far from the path. There were much harsher punishments available for the real troublemakers, but I was invisible, remember, so I didn’t fall into that category by a long way. To be fair, it wasn’t actually much of a deterrent to me. I just tended to behave because it made life easier for everyone, and that had rewards of its own.

I made my way to my locker to grab a few things and get rid of some books I didn’t want to lug home. The corridors were pretty much deserted by this time, just the occasional kid wandering here and there, and a few teachers. It was weird to see the school like that, so devoid of life so soon after it had been a buzzing, vibrant place. My locker was pretty much at the other end of school from the room where detention was held, so it took a few minutes to get there. Not that I really noticed the passage of time, though. My thoughts were still occupied with you-know-who. I dumped the books and was just turning to leave when… Bang! There they were again. Those blue eyes. Tay was standing there, his backpack in one hand, the skateboard under the other arm. I didn’t really know what to say, but returned his greeting when it was offered.

‘Sorry for getting you into trouble,’ he said, the hint of a grin at the corner of his mouth. I shrugged.

‘It wasn’t your fault I was daydreaming.’

It was Tay’s turn to shrug.

‘I’m sorry anyway,’ he said. ‘Can we talk?’

This was a new experience for me. Someone wanting to actually have a conversation with me. It was so grown up. Usually, conversations lasted no more than a few sentences, and then they were spontaneous, not orchestrated. I nodded my assent, though. I really wanted to know what Tay had to say. I was really nervous, actually, proper sweaty palms and butterflies time. I followed Tay out of the building to one of the benches outside. There were still a few kids playing football nearby, but we couldn’t be overheard. Since it was Tay who initiated the meeting, I left it to him to say the first words.

‘Look, I’m really sorry for what I did. I didn’t realise what an asshole I was being.’

Whoa! Hold on a second here! I had shouted at Tay and now he was apologising to me? I wasn’t quite sure where that came from, but I kept the thought to myself, and instead made sure I got my own apology in, even if it was a bit late.

‘No, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said what I did to you. It was well out of order.’

‘Nah, man, I deserved it. You’re cool and I just treated you real bad.’

I think it took about five seconds for that to really sink in. Not the apology. The bit where he said ‘you’re cool’. Somewhere in my hindbrain I realised he was probably just saying it to make me feel better, but the conscious part of my head was screaming in joy. My heart, so heavy all day long, was suddenly free and soaring high above us in the blue, blue sky. I probably should have spoken sooner, because my silence prompted Tay to speak up again.

‘Are we ok, then?’

I didn’t have words for how ok we were. All my caution, all my cynicism went out of the window. I nodded vigorously.

‘And can we do the project still? I promise I’ll turn up this time. Look, I’ve already done some work,’ he said, reaching into his bag to pull some sheets of paper out. It was photocopies of a book about Galileo’s observations, with passages highlighted in green marker. I’d already done something similar, but that wasn’t the point. Tay wanted to work with me, was willing to go to all this effort overnight just to make things better.

‘Is this why you weren’t here this morning?’ I asked. I don’t know why I asked, I just did. I think I needed to know. Tay, to my surprise, shook his head.

‘Nah, I had to go to hospital with my little bro. He gets physio once a month. Needed me there today, so I went.’

How could I be so stupid and cynical? How could I forget that his brother was in a wheelchair, and that Tay was the perfect big brother, doing anything Nate wanted to do? How did I not realise how much I loved him already? I just nodded my head, didn’t say anything, didn’t want to risk my foot ending up in my mouth again.

‘Anyway, dude, gotta go,’ he said, standing. ‘Catch you tomorrow, yeah?’

I nodded again, still not trusting that pesky tongue of mine. I watched him walk away, and then skate just as soon as he was outside the school grounds. He looked back once as he left, smiling that electric smile.

That night in bed, the familiar urge came over me. I was never one to refuse my dick anything, and so I made sure the door was closed and locked, and went to it. It wasn’t anything special, until I neared orgasm. This time, instead of the usual concentration on the feelings coming from down below, my mind suddenly flooded with images of Tay. There he was on his board. Then sitting next me on the bench at school. Then getting changed for swimming. That last image was the one that sent me over the edge. I’d never seen him totally naked, we always wrapped towels around ourselves, but the sight of the rest of his body was enough. He wasn’t exactly thin, but there wasn’t an ounce of excess fat on him. He even had a six-pack, I suppose from skating all the time. As I wiped my tiny emission from a still-hairless groin, the feelings of guilt flooded over me. Sleep and the sunrise washed the emotion from me, but it would return that evening, this time with back-up.

Life improved again. Why wouldn’t it? I was spending at least one evening with Tay each week, and sometimes more, especially when the skies were clear and we could get a really good look at Jupiter. He worked harder, and though he wasn’t the best pupil in the class, he did his fair share. For my part, I was ecstatic every time he turned up at my house, contented when he had left, and guilty as hell when I wanked myself off to images of him from the evening. The association with Tay brought real life benefits, too. I was no longer invisible at school. Tay would talk to me during the day, sometimes specifically coming to find me. The respect that generated among my friends was heavenly.

It wasn’t just the work that bonded us, though. The more time I spent with Tay, the more I wanted to spend, and he actively sought to stay around at my house after the work was done, too. We actually had a lot more in common than we had at first realised, things like a similar taste in music and in books. We even discussed girls at one point. I thought I was dead in the water when that particular conversation began, because I had no experience, and didn’t particularly like any of the girls at school. I had assumed that Tay would be quite the ladies’ man, but as it turned out he was as shy and inexperienced as I was, even going as far as to admit that he really didn’t want a girlfriend. I should perhaps have read a little more into that than I did, because I found out later that he was definitely trying to tell me something. But at the time I just felt relieved that I wasn’t the only one who wasn’t quite ready for that yet.

Tay changed me, too. I relaxed, took things a bit more calmly. My schoolwork didn’t suffer, but then nor did I if it wasn’t done perfectly. I adopted a few of Tay’s mannerisms, and with his advice decided to grow my hair a bit, and wear it more messy than I usually had it. And my clothes were changed, too. I had been living in boring blue jeans and simple t-shirts. Tay introduced me to the joy of baggy jeans, cords and hoodies. I loved it all. Best of the lot, though, was the introduction to boxers. I’d always just worn briefs, but seeing the waistband of Tay’s boxers poking out the top if his jeans when he showed me a scar on his otherwise flawless tummy changed my mind about all that. I was entranced, and took a little longer than I should have done looking at the scar, or at least in the general direction. Tay didn’t seem to mind, though. The image of him lying there with his t-shirt pulled up and the creases of his tanned stomach disappearing beneath the band of those shorts fuelled my fantasies for days and weeks to come.

I’d love to say the project went perfectly, and that we got the highest grade in class, and everyone wondered how we’d done such an amazing job, but that simply wasn’t the case. We ended up messing around a little too much, and though the work was above average, it wasn’t the best we could have done. Tay couldn’t have cared less, though. He was ecstatic with the result, far better than his usual marks, and it led him to ask me round to his house to thank me for helping him so much. To be honest, he had helped himself after our initial upset, working harder than ever before, and not requiring any prompting from me. But I wasn’t about to refuse the offer, as I’d never before been to his house. We’d always worked at mine because that’s where the telescope was. His dad was quite keen to meet me, too, as it seemed that he wanted to thank me for finally getting his son to do some work. Quite frankly, I wanted to thank him for bringing such a wonderful creature as Tay into the world, but decided that perhaps that might be going a bit too far.
Tay’s house was big. I mean, really big. Mine wasn’t bad, but his was seriously nice. It was part of an estate of equally nice houses, and there was only one road in and out of the place, brick paved rather than tarmac’d. I was impressed, to say the least. Tay actually had the grace to look a bit embarrassed by his parents’ affluence, though not so much that he could resist showing me round. The crowning feature was a heated indoor swimming pool. My jaw had to be winched back into place.

Tay’s dad was still at work when we got there straight after school, but his mum was around, and Tay introduced me as we walked in the back door, straight into the kitchen.
‘So, finally we get to meet the famous Andrew. Tay hasn’t stopped talking about you,’ she said when the introductions had been made.

‘Mom, quit it!’ Tay said, the embarrassment flooding his face as a strong blush. He looked so gorgeous then, I realised. It was a strange time for the realisation to hit me, but it was in the moments after that, as I followed Tay up to his room, that I finally came to understand what I felt for Tay. I really did find him attractive. I wanted to hug him. To do things far worse than hugging. I suddenly felt sick, knowing that it could never happen, but that I would have to think of it all the time I was with him. Damn.

Tay’s room was moderately spectacular. He didn’t want for anything, that was for certain. He even had his own en-suite bathroom. No-one my age ever had his own bathroom! There was a big double bed along one wall, though it barely made an impact on what was quite frankly a huge room. He was just showing me his TV and stereo when I heard the squeak of rubber on polished floorboards. I had guessed right when I thought that the whole house was carpet-free for the sake of his brother’s wheelchair. Nate wheeled himself through the open door, and Tay immediately went to high-five him. I envied the relationship immediately. Tay was really cool with his brother, not acting like he was in a wheelchair at all. The introductions were made, and I got another round of ‘so, this is Andrew…’ type comments, before Tay silenced his brother with a sharp look. I don’t think I was meant to see the silent communication, or the renewed blush on Tay’s face. Damn, he really was quite good looking. Nate left, chuckling to himself, and we got on with the business of just being boys.

Dinner was fun, really fun. I was introduced to Tay’s dad at the table, he having just walked through the door as the food hit the table. It was great to be part of a family, sitting down to eat together, laughing and joking, and just catching up on the news of the day. There was a bit more subtle ribbing of Tay by his brother, but that was halted by a swift kick to the wheel of Nate’s chair. The kid didn’t seem to take it so badly, though, continuing to snigger to himself, until his mum told him to grow up. Even as she was telling him off, there was a smile on her own face. I caught her watching me more than once during the meal, as I was questioned by Nate and Tay’s dad, and each time our eyes met she would smile warmly at me, in a very motherly way.

I’d been invited to stay over, the first time in a long time I’d been asked by a friend to sleep over. Of course I accepted, though now I had realised how I felt about Tay, that it was more than mere friendship to me, the boundaries had changed somewhat. I was nervous, almost frightened of going to bed. A camp bed had been made up for me in Tay’s room, though I don’t think I could have refused if he’d offered me a place in his bed. We were still quite shy boys at heart, despite Tay’s typically outgoing attitude and my new-found confidence in myself, and so changing involved a trip into his bathroom. I wasn’t about to sleep like I did at home, in the nude (my mother had finally relented on that one), and so it was boxers and a t-shirt. I was so nervous that I didn’t even get slightly hard at the prospect of spending the night in the same room as Tay. I was grateful for it, too – any sort of bulge in the front of my boxers would have shown up immediately. By the time I re-entered the room, Tay was already changed and half under the covers. His torso was bare, and the sight of it immediately sent blood rushing south. I quickly made my way under the covers on my bed, hiding my growing erection just in time. We chatted for a while, with the TV on in the background. The conversation covered pretty much everything, flowing from subject to subject without pause.

Eventually, though, we were both too tired to continue speaking, and with a contented sigh I settled down. There was just one more treat for me before I drifted off to sleep. The light switch over Tay’s bed wasn’t working properly, and he had to get up to use the one on the far side of the room. He was just wearing boxers, and I watched his body as he padded across the floor on bare feet the reach the switch. He sort of caught me staring as he turned round to look at me just before switching the light off, and smiled an odd, satisfied smile for a second before the room was plunged into darkness.

I slept fairly soundly, usually, but the combination of a strange bed and my excitement at the situation I was in made it impossible to do much more than doze. I drifted in and out of consciousness, lying on my side, facing out across the room. Sometime during the night, I sensed movement and realised that Tay was making his way to the bathroom. I couldn’t see much in the gloom, but the door shut and the light came on on the other side to confirm my suspicion. He was in there quite a while, I realised. Probably having a dump, I thought, and sure enough after a few minutes I heard the toilet flush. For some reason I felt guilty thinking about it, and when the door opened I quickly shut my eyes and feigned sleep. Not before I saw a sight that made my hard dick spasm on the spot, though. Tay opened the door to his bathroom before switching off the light and I realised that what I was seeing in the doorway was a very naked Tay. There wasn’t much detail to be seen, the light behind him giving him an almost silhouetted appearance, but it was enough for me right then. I was glad that my emission was no more than a couple of watery drops, otherwise I would have soaked the bed completely.

Waking in Tay’s house was a mildly frightening experience for those few moments before my brain clicked into gear and I realised where I was and why. During the night, I’d thrown the covers back, and was horrified to see my morning hard-on tenting my boxers quite obscenely. I checked to see if Tay could see me, but he was still fast asleep , his covers down around his waist but not quite as revealing as mine. He was lying on his stomach, facing out into the room. If he was awake, he would have seen the tent leading me into his bathroom. I thanked my lucky stars that he was asleep, or at least appeared to be. I wasn’t horny enough to have a wank, so I just had a quick piss to deflate Mr Happy downstairs, and walked back into the room. I could have sworn I saw Tay’s eyes snap shut, but put it down to wishful thinking and hopped back into bed. Not long afterwards, Tay stirred and stretched groggily, smiling across at me when he turned my way.

We spent the day in town, meeting up briefly with Tay’s skater mates, before heading off to catch a film. He’d forgone his usually Saturday afternoon ritual of hitting rails and kickers to spend the time with me, knowing that I wasn’t that keen on skating, and the feeling that gave me inside was enough to have me grinning stupidly all the time. Tay noticed, I know that much, but he didn’t say anything. I don’t even remember what film it was we saw, but I do remember what happened afterwards as clearly as if it had happened ten minutes ago. As usual, I had been tempted into buying a huge drink before the movie, and as soon as it was over I needed to piss big time. I told Tay, who indicated that he, too, really needed to go. Usually, boys didn’t go at the same time, it was just considered too embarrassing, even though they were public toilets. But Tay didn’t seem to care, and happily followed me in. What was even more shocking was when he stood next to me at the long trough urinal, not right down the far end as I had expected. Tay didn’t seem to think twice about it, and just unzipped and pulled his dick out, and let loose.

What would you have done in that situation? Of course I looked, I would have been stupid not to. I made it as subtle as possible, but he was so close that it wasn’t hard to get a good look. He had pulled maybe two inches out of his fly, and I was willing to bet there was about another inch left in there. What struck me immediately was that Tay was circumcised. I knew of the operation, but I’d never seen one without skin covering the head before. I rather liked it, actually. It was a nice neat cut, and he had such a perfect white shaft and pink head. The proportions were just lovely to look at.
Watching him piss pretty quickly sent the blood rushing to my dick, and just as I was finishing up and squeezing the last drops out of my foreskin, I was getting quite hard. I stole one last glance at Tay’s crotch, and noticed that he, too, looked a little bit bigger than he had been. When I looked up to his face, he was grinning at me and blushing sweetly, and I knew he’d just given me a show. That didn’t make it any easier to make my dick go down, and I silently thanks Tay again for introducing me to baggy jeans and boxers.

What I couldn’t fathom through all of this was what Tay felt for me. I knew for certain now that I found him attractive, and felt about him the way I should about girls. I wasn’t stupid, I knew boys went through phases, and I’d reconciled myself with the concept. If this was a phase, my feelings would go away after a while, and if it wasn’t, I would cross that bridge when I came to it. But I didn’t know what Tay was thinking when we had all these moments. Had he meant for me to see him naked coming out of his bathroom? Surely it wouldn’t have been that hard to keep his boxers on when he went to the loo. Had he watched me coming out of the bathroom the morning after? I was convinced, for a few seconds at least, that I had seen his eyes shutting. And was it a deliberate show in the toilets in the cinema? It had certainly seemed that way to me. I couldn’t ignore the possibility, though, that I was imagining everything, that Tay’s actions were entirely innocent. My horny, nearly-teenaged mind could have been reading a lot more into the situation than was really there. It took a hell of a brave move by Tay to make me realise that none of it was innocent, that all of it was meant to make me realise something very important – I wasn’t the only person in this friendship who secretly fancied the other person.

It was a few weeks after our visit to the cinema when my life changed irrevocably. I’d like to say that we had become inseparable, but it wouldn’t quite ring true, not just yet anyway. We were just friends still, really. Tay still spent time with his skater mates, hanging around in town, and I still spent a lot of time alone, but there were times, like most lunchtimes and a few days a week, that would be ‘me and Tay’ time. When we were together, it was always in the absence of other friends, and more often than not, there would be one of those little hints from Tay, not that I was clever enough to realise what was going on. There were a couple of repeat performances of the naked night time bathroom trip, and I got a good look on each occasion, still struggling to see anything with the light behind him. There was even another pissing incident, where Tay left his dick out for a few moments after he was done, waiting for my stream to dry up, clearly watching me piss and getting quite hard in the process. I was still too scared to do anything about it though. I was petrified that if I was reading more into this than was really there, Tay would jump back in horror as I made my move, and declare to the world how much of a fag I was. If only I’d been braver, we could have been together sooner, but it took Tay to make the move which got the whole thing rolling.

It was fairly simple in the end, really. We were watching a film in his room, both sat with our backs propped up against the headboard of his bed. Tay went for a piss, not even bothering to close the bathroom door so we could continue talking. It didn’t freak me out any more, but nor could I see anything, so it wasn’t entirely an erotic situation. When he returned, I realised that Tay was sitting a little closer than he had been. Our arms and legs were now touching, his left side to my right. Slowly, inexorably, he got closer, until finally with a sigh his head fell onto my shoulder. He was close enough now that I could feel his heart trying to beat its way out through his chest, and I was sure he could feel mine doing the same. His head rolled a little further onto my shoulder, and I realised that my arm was far enough around him to embrace his shoulders, which I took the opportunity to do so, moving ever so slowly in case I freaked him out. It didn’t bother him, though. In fact, it had just the opposite effect, Tay snuggling in even closer to me, the whole length of his body now touching mine, and draped an arm across my chest.

We stayed like this for the rest of the movie. My arm began to go to sleep, but I didn’t dare move it in case the contact ended. I had so badly wanted to hold Tay, and now that I was doing so, I never wanted to let go. When the credits rolled, I could feel Tay shifting, and realised that he wanted my arm off his shoulders. I was disappointed, but could hardly refuse. It turned out that letting go of him then was the wisest thing I could have done, as, rather than getting up and turning the film off, Tay sat up and span around, swinging his leg over my lap and climbing on top of me, kneeling there. I started to ask him what he was doing, but he just put his index finger on my lips to silence me and leaned forward.

It struck me what was about to happen, and I realised I was very ready for it. I wanted Tay to kiss me so badly, and sure enough he leaned forward, planting his hands either side of my shoulders, and got in close. When our lips touched, a bolt of electricity ran through me. I know it’s an overused line, but it really did feel like that. And I’m sure you can guess where the bolt ended up. The kiss wasn’t perfect by any means, we were just mashing lips at first, until I felt Tay’s mouth open a little, and I did the same, and the wow factor went through the roof.

My dick was like a steel rod at this point, so hard that I was worried it might snap off if Tay wasn’t careful. He was sitting right on top of it, his arse grinding back and forth along its length as we kissed. He was getting as much from the motion as I was, judging by the moans coming through the kiss, and all too soon he broke the kiss to gasp and hang his head as he came, thrusting short little thrusts to make it all that much better. The look on his face when he looked back up at me was all it took to push me over the edge, and I hunched my hips hard against his backside a couple of times as I spurted in my boxers. The look had been a mix of fear, shyness and above all raw passion. There wasn’t time to talk, or even to clean our pants up, as his mother called us down for dinner. I sat there at the table, unable to stop myself from grinning, and watched as Tay did exactly the same. Strangely, one of the things I remember most about that meal was my ejaculate, which hadn’t soaked into my boxers, and had no pubes to stop it, seeping slowly down through that crease between by scrotum and my leg and into the crack of my arse. They say that your first sexual experience is formative, and I think that’s absolutely right, as I still love that feeling to this day.

I was staying over that night, and when we got upstairs and looked at the camp bed, Tay and I both simultaneously looked at each other and shook our heads. There was no way I wasn’t staying with him in his bed, and after messing up the sheets a little to make it look like the camp bed had been used, we proceeded to ignore it. I needed a piss really badly, so went into the bathroom to do my stuff, leaving the door open as had become customary. I heard a lot of rustling and the squeaking of bed springs as I peed, and was intrigued to find out what I would discover upon my return. I wasn’t disappointed. There, on the floor, was a pile of Tay’s clothing, and atop the pile, a crowning glory, were his boxers. Tay was under the covers, though they were pushed down to just above his waist. When he saw me entering the room, he pulled back the covers to reveal his nude form, his hard spike at its very centre, looking lovelier than I could have imagined. He was probably four inches long when he was hard, maybe a little longer, and certainly a bit thicker than my own. I wasted no time getting naked myself, and jumped onto the bed and into his arms.

We resumed the kissing that had us so hot and bothered earlier in the evening. This time it was a different kettle of fish, however, as we were now devoid of clothes, allowing our hard dicks to rub together. It was a good thing we’d already come that afternoon, or it would have been over in moments. We still didn’t last long, though, and I spurted onto both our stomachs, and felt the semen getting mashed between us. Tay came at almost the same time, but I felt nothing splashing on us from him, and discovered that he was still almost dry and had used his supply up coming in his boxers earlier in the day. With the good feelings still running through our bodies, I rolled onto my back, Tay now hugging my side with his head on my shoulder, and drifted off to sleep.
When I awoke the next morning, it was to my first sunrise as Tay’s boyfriend, my first sunrise in love, the first sunrise of the rest of my life.
   
I was woken up in the morning by a combination of excessive heat and an urgent need to piss. The heat was dealt with quite easily, by unwrapping a still-sleeping Tay from my right hand side and climbing out of beneath the covers. Until that night I had never slept with another person in the bed, and had no idea quite how hot it was going to get. The need to relieve the pressure in my bladder was a little more complex. I was still naked from my night in bed with Tay, and had a morning erection, not helped by seeing Tay’s own one when I moved him off me. I found my pants, still wrapped up in my jeans where I’d torn them off the night before, and slipped into them to make the short trip to the toilet.

There wasn’t anyone else up in the house, it was still far too early for that, and so I wasn’t spotted with the rather obvious tent in my pants, which was a great relief. I finally managed to get my dick pointed downwards enough to let me piss, and let the tension drain out of me. When I made it back to Tay’s room, he was still there lying on his back, the covers thrown off to the far side of him, and a decent little boner sticking up from his midriff. I smiled at the sight. It looked a little larger than my own, but I realised fairly quickly that it was about the same size, and the circumcision made it look bigger. Like most American boys, Tay was cut, unlike me. I had a huge overhang of foreskin, more than enough for the both of us, to be fair. It still hung over the end of my dick by about half an inch when it was rock hard. Slipping my pants off, I got onto the bed next to Tay, and, feeling a little nervous for some reason, reached over to take his dick in my hand.
It was so smooth, and so hard, that I never wanted to let go. I leaned in for a closer look, and checked out his balls at the same time. They were about the same size as mine I supposed, slightly grown from when he was a kid, but not so large as to appear adult. I knew from last night’s experience that they weren’t ready to make any cum yet. Slowly, carefully, I started to move the skin on Tay’s dick up and down, wanking him carefully. He still appeared to be asleep, but started moaning and lifted his hips up off the bed as I worked, pushing himself into my hand more and more insistently. After a few minutes, I realised that either he was awake, or he was very good at sleep-humping. A bit like sleep-walking, but a lot more fun.

His orgasm brought a gasp, and caused his eyes to flutter open at last. He was a little unfocussed for a couple of seconds, but then got his sight back and looked deep into my eyes, smiling and arching his back, stretching his limbs as he did so.

‘Morning,’ I said, quietly as I could manage.

‘Hey,’ he said, through a strong yawn.

I smiled back at him and lay down. My dick was still raging, but I knew Tay would handle that in a bit.

Some of the changes were subtle, others less so. We were boyfriends now, though the number of people that knew could be counted on, well, two fingers. No-one else had a clue, though if they’d had the slightest concept of what was going on between Tay and I, the proof would have been there to be seen in broad daylight. We sat just a little too close for ‘just good friends’, spent a little too much time together for ‘best mates’, and slept in one too few beds to be considered anything other than ‘lovers’. Obviously, staying over at each other’s houses every night was out of the question, but now we met up and walked to school together every day, sneaking off into the bushes of a park that was on the way from our meeting place for a quick grope before school. It meant leaving a bit earlier for school than I would otherwise, but my mum was always worried about me being late, so she ignored it. It’s amazing what you can get away with when people would prefer to think the best of you. We would sleep in the same bed at my house, and rather than raising any eyebrows, my parents were far happier to be pleased that I had a good friend than actually think about the nature of that friendship.

Tay’s parents were entirely a different kettle of fish. Of course they were keen to meet my parents, but whereas at their house they were always making the subtlest of suggestions that they understood our relationship, when meeting my mum and dad they said nothing at all. I think looking back on it, they knew Tay well enough to realise his preferences, but weren’t sure how well my parents understood me. Luckily, they all got on really well, our dads finding common interest in motorsport, and our mums finding common interest in the behaviour of two certain twelve-year-old boys.

How none of our school friends noticed the burgeoning relationship I will never know. We did make an effort to cover our tracks, not spending too much time together, and certainly doing none of the hand-holding we were prone to when alone. But we’d gone from casual acquaintances who had worked together on a project to being best friends in the space of a few days. I suppose back then it was easier and quicker to form strong bonds with classmates, so it wouldn’t have looked too far out of place. Either way, no-one was any the wiser, even when we sneaked off together to the boys toilets at lunchtime, to practice the newly discovered art of kissing, and to work on our mutual wanking techniques. We used to have to stifle furious giggling when we were nearly caught several times.

Going home in the afternoon was always fun, too. I would always head around to Tay’s house, something that both his mother and mine encouraged, since I would have otherwise be left alone. Little did they know what was happening behind Tay’s closed and locked bedroom door. It would always start with lying down on the bed together and hugging for a while, chatting about stuff that had happened at school. Then, with a grin, Tay would usually roll on top of me, and our already hard dicks would come into contact, still separated by school uniform trousers and our pants. Tay would start grinding against me, and before long I would be pushing back, enjoying the sensations of my still-sheathed dick rubbing against the soft cotton of my pants. I always liked to wank him off first, before he wanked me, and that seemed to suit Tay. After a few minutes’ worth of grinding, he would roll over, and with an even wider grin, one of pure mischief, he would lay himself open to me. I had a bit of a thing about school uniform (still do, in fact) and used to just pull his hard shaft out of the fly of his trousers and go at it there and then, leaving him still in his shirt and trousers, arching his back as the sensations overwhelmed him. The he would do me, preferring me to strip off all the way until I was lying there naked. More than once he got a bit kinky and used our two school ties to secure my hands to the bed, and then got to work on me, going slowly until I begged him for release. When he knew I really needed to get off, he would then work really hard and fast on me, my foreskin flying up and down on my shaft. He would lean in, carefully watching what he was doing, delighting in the spitting conclusion of our passion, before jumping up to get a tissue to wipe me up. I didn’t spurt much, and it was still thin and watery, but it was enough to need a tissue to wipe up, and I was very proud of it.

Of course, not all of our relationship was about sex. A lot of it was, admittedly, but that was the hormones talking. And besides, you’ve got to have fun when you’re that age. But Tay also broadened my horizons, and I his. He was determined to make sure that by the end of the year I could skate, and so we spent hours outside the front of his house on the smooth pavement, getting me used to the idea. I was totally non-sporting, and was therefore pleasantly surprised when within a few hours I could actually balance properly, and move the thing around a bit. Pride, of course, led to an immediate fall, which brought Tay rushing over, concern mirrored in his features. I was ok, but he insisted that we go to his room for a through medical check-up. Of course, it quickly turned into an excuse for a bit of messing around, but I wasn’t about to complain.

When we actually got to spend a bit of time on our boards, I discovered that far from hating the sport, I actually really liked it. The biggest problem was the lack of equipment – Tay only had one deck, and I didn’t have one at all, so we were forced to share it, which meant that we couldn’t skate at the same time. Tay insisted that it was ok, that he liked watching me. I didn’t doubt that for a second – he couldn’t take his eyes off various parts of my body most of the time, so I understood that he wanted to watch me – but I felt really bad about not having a deck of my own, restricting Tay’s time on his at the same time. I’d always been raised to be fairly self-sufficient, and so when Tay offered to use some of his savings to buy me a deck, I refused. I made sure he understood how much I appreciated the gesture – that was a fun afternoon – but I wouldn’t let him spend the money. Instead, I increased my paper round from once a week to three times a week, and on a bigger round. One of the other boys had just left, and I took over his work, earning about four times as much as I had before. Usually, my wage was squandered, but now I had something to aim for, and someone to motivate me, the money soon started adding up. It was going to take three months for me to get enough money together, and in the meantime Tay and I would lie on his bed flicking through magazines together, our socked feet tangling in the air behind us as we lay on our stomachs, hard-ons pressed into the mattress. We always seemed to be hard lying on that bed, even when we were doing nothing more than choosing which design of deck I was going to get, what wheels, and how loose or tight I wanted my kingpin. Of course, being boys, jokes were always made about the tightness of our kingpins, which led to messing around, groping, and usually ended up with spillage on my pale tummy.

When I finally had enough money to order the parts I wanted, we were hit with yet another problem: how to get hold of it all. Tay had brought his deck with him from America, but here in Britain there really weren’t many skate shops around, and none close enough for us to reach. The only places available to us, since this was before the time of widespread internet availability, were mail order companies in the backs of Tay’s magazines. And therein lay the biggest problem – you had to ring them up and pay by credit card or send a cheque, neither of which we were able to do.

We were deliberating over this thorny problem, even considering getting the National Express coach to London to visit a big store there, when Tay’s dad overheard us.

‘Do you want me to ring for you? Give me your money, and I’ll put it on my credit card,’ he said. Immediately, we both jumped at the offer, and before long, with a list of what to order, Tay’s dad was trooping off to his office to make the phone call.

‘Your dad’s really cool, you know that?’ I said when he was gone. Tay just blushed a bit, and shrugged.

‘No he’s not, he’s my dad. Dad’s aren’t cool.’

It took nearly a week for everything to turn up, and when we walked through Tay’s front door and nearly tripped over the boxes the courier had left with his mum, our excitement finally peaked. We were in such a hurry to put everything together that we even forgot to go to Tay’s room and mess around, which was the first time in a long time we hadn’t gone straight there.

The boxes were emptied out over the living room floor, packaging flying everywhere. It was only when everything was laid out and ready to be put together that we realised something was horribly wrong, the excitement draining out of us immediately. The deck was the right one, though I was sure I hadn’t paid for the really good quality grip tape that was plastered across the top. Everything else was totally wrong. The wheels were far better than the ones I’d ordered, as were the trucks. We sat there dejected, not knowing quite what to do, until Tay’s mum came in and asked why we’d suddenly gone so quiet.

‘Wait until your dad gets home and ask him what happened,’ she said when we explained. We couldn’t understand why she was struggling to keep a smile off her face.
Tay’s dad took forever to get home, and finally made it through the door at about six. He looked pretty tired, but lit up when he saw Tay and I. He always seemed to be really pleased to see us both.

‘Hey kids, how’re my boys doing?’

He always referred to us as ‘his boys’, something which made me feel a little warmer inside every time I heard it. But it wasn’t enough to lift our poor spirits.

‘The shop sent the wrong stuff,’ said Tay, in a voice full of despair, holding up the offending trucks, one in each hand. We’d waited so long that the prospect of waiting any longer was killing us by that point.

‘Did they send a copy of the order?’ Tay’s dad asked. He, too, looked like he was trying not to smile, which I found vaguely infuriating. Tay found to offending document and handed it to his father, who checked the list off against the various boxes strewn around the living room.

‘No, no, this is exactly what I ordered,’ he said, again just about smiling.

‘But it’s not what Andrew asked for, dad!’ said Tay, desperation mingling with exasperation at his dad’s laid back attitude. ‘He can’t afford this stuff.’

‘Oh well,’ his dad replied, ‘it’s my mistake, I’ll cover the difference.’

By this time he was openly grinning, and left the room in a hurry, ostensibly to go and greet his wife. It was only after he’d been gone a minute that it dawned on us exactly what had happened, that Tay’s dad had deliberately bought me nicer parts than I otherwise would have had.

‘Wow, maybe my dad is cool after all!’ Tay said, before grabbing me and hugging me tightly. I returned the hug, smiling broadly now, all the despair lifting from me.

Of course, the board was amazing once we had it put together. Tay even said that he thought it was better than his, but he wasn’t jealous, instead insisting that I needed all the help I could get. That, of course, led to a brief play fight, which came to a sudden halt when Tay kissed me, I got hard very quickly, and we had to retreat to his room before we tore each others’ clothes off out in the street.

Our outdoors activities weren’t restricted to just skating, though. Tay had grown up in the suburbs of Detroit, where there were little more than manicured parks to alleviate the regularity of the streets-upon-streets of houses. Where we lived, though, there was proper woodland, stretching away for miles at the back of Tay’s road. He was right on the edge of the Ashdown forest, and we took great advantage of the fact, setting off for hikes through the woodlands which would occupy whole summer days, and often stretch into the evenings. We worked our way off the beaten path all the time, and would often end up totally alone for the day, not seeing another soul. Of course, being horny nearly-teenage boys, we were quick to take advantage of the solitude. On only our third hike into the deeper woodland, we were walking around with our hard-ons leading the way, poking out of the flies of our jeans, kept hard by the excitement of doing something thoroughly naughty. When we stopped for lunch, it was always in a secluded place, so we could pull our pants to our knees, sitting our bare arses on the soft moss covering on the floor, and wank each other off. We had great fun seeing how far I could shoot, and where. We even walked along one day with Tay’s hand reaching down between us and gripping my tool, doing it slowly until I couldn’t continue walking, and then delighting in the way my semen splattered all over the roots of the tree I was leaning on.

The woodlands were also a place of learning for us in one very important respect, because it was where we found our first porno magazine. We’d both heard about them, of course, but never been lucky enough to actually see any. But walking along one day, we spotted something draped over a branch, flapping in the breeze. I don’t know what compelled us to go to it, after all we’d ignored plenty of similar sights before, but we made our way over to it. When we got there and unwound the magazine, we discovered what it depicted, and immediately our faces were alight. It wasn’t even a soft-core magazine, either, like most that were on sale in the country at the time. It showed everything. Carefully, we packed the slightly soggy document into the backpack Tay was a carrying, and went to find ourselves a private place to look it over.

At the time, we were both a little undecided about women. We were both incredibly turned on by the mag, but I knew that I myself was more interested in the sheer naughtiness of what they were doing, and the acts being performed, than the actual pictures of wide open holes. It was a revelation, though. We learned more in the ten minutes it took to look through what turned out to be about half the magazine than we’d learned in months of messing around together. And two words stuck out more than any others from the content of the magazine – the words ‘oral’ and ‘anal’.

We’d heard about blowjobs, of course, but never really understood the significance. Now we realised that they had nothing to do with blowing, and a whole lot to do with sucking. Fucking someone up the bum was something we weren’t really ready to deal with as a concept, bringing a ‘yuck’ from each of us when we read the text accompanying the pictures of a man’s huge dick disappearing into some porn star’s backside. But the sucking didn’t seem too bad an idea, at least to me. I couldn’t tell what Tay was thinking, couldn’t be sure what he would say if I suggested that we try it, but fortunately my agony of indecision was ended when he said, quite out of the blue whilst fondling my hard dick,

‘I’ll try it on you, if you want.’

‘Try what?’ I asked, missing his point.

‘The sucking thing, of course.’

I don’t think I could have agreed quicker, and the condition that I return the favour when he was done was hardly a deterrent to me.

The feeling of his mouth descending over my dick, and the warmth of it when his lips closed around the base and his tongue came up to brush against the underside still burns strongly in my memory. That first feel, that first realisation of quite how wonderful it was, made me an addict immediately. I knew I would never get enough of that feeling. Fortunately, the magazine had been rather full in its descriptions, and so Tay knew what to do, drawing in his cheeks and moving up and down on my dick. The excitement over what was happening and the sensations it was causing in me had me panting almost straight away, and ready to shoot, and I warned Tay of the fact. As I expected, he pulled off and wanked me hard for a few seconds, gasping as my cum shot further than ever before, right up to my chest, and in greater volume.

‘Glad I didn’t get that in my mouth!’ he joked, but it sounded a little bit forced, almost like he didn’t really believe himself.

It took a minute before my head stopped swimming from the pleasure, by which time Tay was already on his back, jeans and pants around his knees and t-shirt pulled right up under his armpits. He was grinning, and shaking with excitement as I got closer to him, lying down by his side with his dick right in front of my face. I wasn’t so sure of myself now, but reasoned that Tay had done me, and I really ought to return the favour. I was converted the instant my mouth closed over his warm, pulsing erection. I loved the feel of it, the smell of his hairless crotch, the taste of the skin. I even loved the feeling of his bulbous, uncovered dick head pressing into the roof of my mouth, and when I applied suction, I could feel it swelling, along with the rest of his shaft. Tay, too, was extremely excited before we even started, and so I knew he would be there quickly. In fact, it took only a minute or so before he was pushing his hips up to meet my face and drawing a sharp breath through clenched teeth. I felt his dick pulse a couple of times, but since I knew he was still dry, left it there.

At least, I assumed he was still dry. I’d wanked him off that morning, while we lay in bed, and there had been no emission. And yet when he came, I felt a tiny little hot spurt hit the back of my mouth. I kept it there for a second, playing with it with my tongue, actually finding that I liked the salty taste, before swallowing it.

‘You spurted in my mouth!’ I exclaimed when it was free of his spend.

‘I’m sorry, I’m sorry,’ he immediately started apologising, mistaking my delight for anger.

‘Oh, shut up,’ I said, ‘I’m happy. I don’t care. You spurted. That’s so cool!’

Tay was relieved to find I wasn’t angry, so much so that he immediately grabbed me in a bear hug, whispering when I was fully wrapped up in his arms that it had never felt so good before, over and over again. Sucking quickly became our favourite activity, and our hikes were never the same again. My heart still races every time I walk through that wood.

Late summer showers curtailed our activities in the woods, as autumn crept ever closer. We could still hang around skating in town, though, and I got to know Tay’s skater mates quite well. It occurred to me that far from being the rebels and troublemakers that the skater kids were often made out to be, they were actually some of the nicer kids in town. All of them, like Tay, were actually quite well off, despite the deliberate air of scruffiness they put across to the rest of the world, and in reality they were all a little nervous of authority, for all their bravado. One of them even got picked up from town by his dad one day, and yet didn’t draw a single comment from the rest of them, which certainly wouldn’t have been the case among the other groups at school. I came to really enjoy spending time with them, which Tay appreciated.

Sometimes it would be just the two of us, hanging out at the concrete skate park together. Those were the times, assuming that it was dry enough, that we would lie on our backs, shirts off if it was a hot day, and watch the clouds going by. We’d always be just close enough to touch arms and legs, and occasionally, if we were bold enough, hold hands. I loved the feel of Tay’s hot little fingers entwined in mine, and the way he would squeeze my hand now and again, as if to reassure me he was still there. I even kissed him once, late in the afternoon as the sky was beginning to darken and I thought we wouldn’t be seen in the gloom. It was long and passionate, and let to an immediate tent in my shorts, and in his.

We virtually ran home to Tay’s place, decks held in our hands rather than being used – it was just a little quicker to sprint. In five minutes, panting, sweating, we were at his door, ready to burst through. Only, there was a slight hitch – no-one was in. Tay soon solved the problem of the locked door, and quickly went to the kitchen. If there was any explanation for the empty house, it would be there. There was a note, as it turned out, hastily written by Tay’s mum. Apparently his younger sister had fallen down the stairs and broken her arm, and they had taken her to the hospital only twenty minutes prior to our arrival. Tay quickly went to the phone and hit the button to speed-dial his dad’s mobile phone, and managed instead to get hold of his mum. They spoke for a few minutes, and Tay came away from the conversation looking a little glum.

‘You ok?’ I asked him.

‘Yeah, I’m cool, just a bit worried about Lotty.’

Charlotte, always called Lotty, was a couple of years younger than Tay, and he was fiercely protective of her. His unconditional love for his little sister was one of those little things that made Tay a god in my eyes. Whilst all the other kids at school would go on about how much they hated their siblings, and how much they fought with them, Tay was always reserved, never having a bad word to say about Lotty.

‘Do you want to go over to the hospital and see her?’ I asked. Tay shook his head.
‘There’s no point, really, mum says it’s just a lot of waiting around. They’re going to be there until really late.’

‘Do you want me to stay with you tonight, then?’

The look of grateful love in Tay’s eyes when I asked was enough to melt the coldest heart. He didn’t say anything, just nodded with a little smile. I quickly made a phone call to my mum, only getting the answer phone, not expecting anything more. I left a message, knowing that she wouldn’t mind me staying over on a school night, if it was for the right reasons, and went to find Tay, who had wandered off. He was sitting in the living room, in the dark, staring into space. Lotty’s accident had clearly upset him, and so I decided a little distraction was in order.

‘Come with me,’ I said, hauling him up from the sofa with one hand, and leading him to his bedroom. He didn’t resist one bit, just followed me like a puppy.

I threw the messed up sheets off the bed and lay Tay down where they had been, still fully clothed. He wasn’t really responding all that much, I think because he decided that he wanted to be looked after. First of all, I pulled his Vans trainers off his feet, revealing the mucky white socks beneath. These, too, I quickly removed, leaving his feet bare. Usually I would try to make him laugh by tickling them, but this time I simply took them into my hands and kneaded them, massaging the tension of an afternoon’s skateboarding out of them. I chucked off my own shoes and socks when I was finished, making sure that I kept up with the state of dress he was in. Then, kneeling over him, I worked my way up until I could grab the hem of his t-shirt. He allowed me to pull it up and over his head, revealing his smooth torso with just the hint of a six-pack on his tummy. I quickly ripped my own shirt off and threw it across the other side of the room, then returned my attention to Tay.

I leaned in for a kiss, which Tay returned strongly, our tongues intertwining. When I broke it off, I took inspiration from the stories in the porn magazine we had found and lavished wet kisses on his neck and shoulders, slowly working my way down to Tay’s perfect smooth chest. He was moaning very quietly, though the volume increased significantly when I sucked one of his little nipples into my mouth. It wasn’t something we’d explored before – usually, we went straight to our dicks – but now it was definitely on my list of ways to make Tay horny. He really loved it, pushing his chest up to meet my mouth every time I lowered my head. I spent several minutes sucking on each nipple, until they’d swollen slightly and hardened to little pints of steel. Then, lavishing kisses all the way down his tummy as I did so, I snapped the clasp on Tay’s jeans and pulled the zip slowly down. I could feel the heat coming off him, and the rigid flesh beneath the zip as I lowered it. I pulled the jeans down his legs, and stood to take them off his ankles, shedding mine at the same time. Both of us were hard as a rock, tenting our boxers.

Laying down next to my boy, I leaned in and kissed him strongly, and at the same time worked a hand slowly down his body into his boxers, quickly finding his hot little erection. I toyed with it for a moment, feeling the smooth, soft, satiny skin, and the hardness beneath. I played with him slowly for a few minutes, still kissing him, sometimes on the lips, sometimes all around his neck and shoulders. All the while, my fingers traced up and down, light little touches here and there, sometimes rubbing that sensitive spot between his taut scrotum and his hole, sometimes lingering on the spongy head, pressing a fingertip down onto it, rolling it against his lower tummy. Then I would go back to slow, full-handed strokes up and down, until Tay’s hips were lifting on the upstroke, following my hand.

I stopped then, and sat up to look down on him. I’d never seen such a look of lust in his eyes, such a look of raw passion. Kneeling again, I pulled down his boxers, deliberately catching his dick in the waistband and allowing it to slap against his tummy. It was so hard that it vibrated for a couple of seconds until it came to rest. Working my way down to pull Tay’s boxers right off left my head level with his groin, and my prize. His hairless shaft stood proudly pointing towards his head, blue veins standing out beneath the translucent skin. The head was engorged, larger than I’d ever seen it, and darker too. His balls were drawn up tight in their wrinkled sack, too developed to disappear entirely, but under serious threat. Working my way between his legs, I took my time admiring Tay’s centre, before getting down to the real business.

I lapped at his dick with my tongue, like a dog licking you, but infinitely softer-tongued. His balls weren’t left out either, receiving their fair share of licking, and I even went further down to lap at his perineum. I wasn’t quite ready to do what we’d seen in one of the magazines and let my tongue go even further down, but what I did was clearly enough for Tay, who moaned and begged me to stop teasing him as he pushed his hips into the air, shaking with the effort of arching his back. I wasn’t about to refuse a request like that, and so, pushing his hips back onto the bed, I dived for his dick. The head was in my mouth first, and I waited for a moment to ensure I had a good, airtight seal, before turning on the suction and plunging downwards, engulfing the whole thing in one go.
The effect on Tay was instantaneous. I’d never actually heard him cry out before, but this was a definite yell, followed by a whimper. I knew Tay was very close, and keeping the suction on I started bobbing up and down rapidly, wrapping my tongue around his shaft as I worked. Tay was there almost instantly, crying out again as his dick somehow hardened even further and started spitting his still meagre load into my mouth. I worked his dick for a couple of moments longer, milking out one more tiny drop of fluid, before swallowing the few drops he had gifted me and letting his dick slide free.

When I looked up, Tay’s arms were out, begging for a hug, and so I quickly scooted up and wrapped my arms around him. He rocked slightly as we hugged, and kept saying ‘thank you’ over and over, whispering in my ear. I was still hard as a nail, and in need of some serious relief, but Tay was exhausted, and I was happy to let him drift off to sleep.
I awoke a little later, feeling a bit cold, and retrieved the duvet from the floor, throwing over Tay as he slept. When I looked down, I realised how horny I still was – my dick hadn’t gone down one bit. I knew I wouldn’t sleep soundly until I did something about it, and so I pulled the cover back off Tay and started fondling his dick, kneeling over him, as I worked my foreskin up and down. He hardened again quickly, and I enjoyed the sight of him as I wanked myself, quickly reaching orgasm and spraying a few drops of almost clear semen over Tay’s dick and lower tummy. Feeling a little guilty about covering Tay while he slept, I quickly lapped it up and lay down next to him, pulling the covers over both of us.

Tay’s parents were up and about having breakfast when we emerged in the morning. While Tay was rooting around in the fridge for juice for us both, his dad very quietly thanked me for staying with him and making sure everything was alright. I blushed slightly, remembering what we had got up to, but didn’t say anything, just nodded. It turned out that Lotty had been kept in overnight, and Tay’s mum was going to get her at about ten. Tay wanted to stay home and go with her, but was quite firmly told that he was to go to school. In lieu of actually seeing his sister, Tay rushed off upstairs and returned a couple of minutes later with a note, which he stuffed into an envelope and sealed, with strict instructions that only Lotty was to read it.

On the way to school, I asked him what he had written in the note, and at first he was coy about it. I was intrigued, though, and knew that he would yield eventually, and tell me what was so important that his mum wasn’t allowed to see the note. He did relent, sooner than I thought he might, and dragged me off the footpath into a cemetery we passed every day. It was deathly quiet in there.

‘I just had to tell her something, ok? It couldn’t wait. I needed her to know.’

‘But what did you tell her?’ I asked, getting a little exasperated now.

‘Promise you won’t get mad at me, ok?’

‘Yeah, of course I won’t.’

‘Well,’ he started, eyes downcast, voice wavering a little, ‘I told her that I love you.’

When the eyes came up, they were wide with fear, glistening with newly formed tears. It was that moment I realised I felt the same way, and grabbed him, jamming my mouth onto his, a mad, passionate kiss, one hand on his back, the other holding his head there. By the time we came up for air, we were late for school. Some things are more important.

Part 3    
The news came at about midday, I suppose. We were in English, I remember that much, and it was just before lunch, too, so I guess midday would be about right. The headmistress came into the room, a grave look on her face, and spoke very quietly to our teacher, whose features soon dropped to mirror those of the head. Very quietly, the headmistress walked over to Tay and asked him to leave the room with her so that she could talk to him in private.

I didn’t see him again that day, and as soon as I got off the bus I ran as hard as I could for his house. I knew something was wrong as soon as I entered their road. People were gathered all around, being nosey in a way that only the English can, and when Tay’s house came into view around the corner, there were two police cars and another one, all black, unmarked but obviously associated with the others. A policeman was standing outside the front door, and as I approached, two more officers came out carrying clear bin liners full of paper. When I first saw the police cars, my mind leapt to the worst possible conclusion – murder. But upon closer inspection, it wasn’t quite right for that. I’d seen plenty of reports about murders on TV and they always had some sort of forensic team around in silly overalls, and there was nothing of the sort there. I was maybe twenty metres from the house when a policeman stopped me.

‘Sorry, son, you can’t go any closer.’

I started to protest that I needed to get in there to see Tay, but I didn’t have the chance to finish the sentence, because he came flying out of the side of the house and crashed into me, grabbing me in a hug that threatened to crush my ribs.

‘I’m so glad you’re here. I’m so glad. It’s all gone wrong,’ he said, before burying his head into my shoulder. I wrapped my arms around him and held him tight, while the policeman just walked away shaking his head.

It took me half an hour to get anything sensible out of Tay, and when I finally discovered what had happened I was in for a bit of a shock. In short, his dad was to be deported to America to face an absolutely massive fraud trial. Apparently they had all the evidence they would ever need, and his dad was going to have to plead guilty just to avoid spending his whole life in prison. The rest of the family was in limbo. Because the house was in his mother’s name (which I discovered later was a precaution for this very outcome), she could retain it, and most of their stuff. But she had no job, and their visas would run out. That meant going back to America, where they would have nothing. The last bit was the real shock for me. For the first time in my life, I risked losing what was most important to me in the world.

I was numb for the next few days. I had to keep going to school, but Tay wasn’t there with me. I saw him maybe once in the evening, but there was so much going on that there was little time for me in his life. His dad was fighting the extradition, but his appeal ,which was fast-tracked because the American authorities wanted him on trial as soon as possible, failed a week later. Tay came to me then, in tears again, inconsolable. His father was leaving on a plane the next day, and he had just five minutes to say goodbye before losing him for years to come. He stayed with me that night, and the one after, my parents accepting of the fact that he needed comforting. He didn’t want to go back to his mother, for fear of hearing more bad news, and just let her know where he was. During the day, he would stay at home, and one the second day I bunked off school to be with him, prepared to face the consequences later on. Strangely, when I went back to school, there were no repercussions. The head asked me into her office for a while, and I was convinced I was about to get into serious trouble, but she just wanted to know how I was feeling, and how Tay was. I found out from a friend later that he had confessed my deepest secret to the headmistress, who, despite coming across as a very stuffy old woman, was actually remarkably forward thinking about the nature of our relationship. I was offered support, and nothing else. No punishment, no rebuke, just a gentle reminder that I couldn’t allow my schoolwork to suffer through all of this.

Days passed, became weeks, became a month. Tay was still depressed, still unable to concentrate at school, so he didn’t go until the summer holidays hit us. I was acutely aware that things were about to get worse though, as I spoke to his mother one day, who informed me that their visas would be up at the end of August. It was the fourth when she told me, giving them just under four weeks left before they would have to leave the country. I couldn’t bear to lose Tay. I needed so desperately to make him better, and if he went back to America, that would never happen.

The thinnest of rays of hope was on the horizon, though, the smallest chance that they wouldn’t have to leave. Tay’s mother didn’t want to uproot her children, and had tried, unsuccessfully, to get a job and keep them in the country. She would be able to make a certain amount of capital from the sale of their home, but that money wouldn’t last forever, and the government knew it. They were given one last chance, the one chance that everyone in the UK gets – the opportunity to go to arbitration. They would have to go in front of a magistrate to plead their case, though with three dependents and no sign of income, their chances were fairly slim. Tay grew increasingly anxious as the day of the hearing approached. He stayed at my house the night before, and I held him as he cried himself to sleep, soaking the shoulder of my t-shirt with his tears. When he left in the morning with his mother, his face was one of utter dejection. He was sure of the result before they’d even attended the hearing, and my father had privately expressed his own opinions about their chances of staying in the country, which he assessed as pretty poor. When I got back to my room, I lay face down on my bed and burst into tears.

My father must have heard me, though I’d tried to be as quiet as possible. He was off work that week, having taken a little time off to work around the house. A recent promotion meant that he didn’t have to travel so much anymore. It would have been something really worth celebrating if I had felt like celebrating during those few weeks. The upshot was that he had more money, more time for me, and more time off. We weren’t exactly going to be rich now, but suddenly things were a lot more comfortable. Anyway, he must have heard me sobbing into my pillow because without me realising it, he crept into my room. The first I knew of him being there was the big hand that rested on my shoulder, followed by the rock of the bed as he sat down next to me.

‘He’s a good friend, isn’t he?’

I rolled over onto my side and looked up at my dad through tear-clouded eyes. I nodded slowly, wiping the tears from my eyes as best I could. I must have looked a complete mess.

‘Perhaps more than a friend, though, right?’

My heart leapt into my mouth. “Busted!”, as Tay would have put it. I tried valiantly to deny it, but my dad hushed me and grabbed me into a hug, crushing me against him. He’d never been a physical kind of guy, but he overcame his own inhibitions to comfort me then, to try to heal my hurts.

‘Do you have any smart clothes clean?’ he asked after a few minutes. I couldn’t work out why I would need them, but I didn’t get the chance to ask. As soon as I had nodded my head my dad leapt into action.

‘Get into them, and get your school shoes on. I’ll see you downstairs.’

With that he all but ran out of the room and into his room. I could hear him rifling through his suits in his wardrobe, and wondered what on earth he could be up to. When he joined me downstairs a few minutes later, he was smarter than I’d ever seen him. I’d seen him going off to work sometimes, occasionally wearing a full suit, but never this well dressed. He looked amazing, like a proper businessman, and grinned when he saw the look on my face.

‘Still got it then,’ he said, half to himself. I didn’t realise what I was thinking at the time, but in retrospect part of my gay little brain must have thought that he was incredibly good-looking.

He walked out to the car, leaving me to lock up the house, still not saying where we were going. It was only when we were on the dual carriageway heading into town that he finally revealed what he was planning.

‘The reason that Tay’s family can’t stay here is that the government is worried they won’t be able to support themselves, so they don’t think they should be here. They need some sort of promise that his family won’t just start asking for benefit when they don’t even come from here, and could get by in their own country. But if someone gives them that promise, and can prove it, they might be allowed to stay.’

‘So?’ I said. I still didn’t have a clue what he was planning, which, in retrospect, was bloody stupid of me.

‘So, I’ll go in there and tell them that I’ll support them if Tay’s mum can’t get a job.’

I was stunned.

‘But why would you do that?’

‘Because,’ replied my dad, somewhat exasperated with my stupidity by this point, ‘you love him, don’t you?’

The guard on the door of the court didn’t want to let us in. The hearing was in progress by the time we got there, and apparently it was too late to go in. My dad told me to go and wait near the entrance to the courtroom, and started talking to the guard in a very low voice. I don’t know what he said, and he would never tell me, but a couple of minutes later we were inside.

Tay looked round when we came in, even though I thought we had been all but silent. He was the only one who noticed us coming in. His eyes were dull and lifeless, and red from crying. He hardly recognised me, but when he did was able to give me a weak smile, before turning back to face the front. The magistrate was just summing up when we got there – it seemed the hearing had been rather perfunctory.

‘In this light of your lack of financial support for your children, Mrs MacIntyre, and the likelihood that you would have to claim state benefit should you remain in this country, I can see no way that I can possibly extend your visa. You have demonstrated to me that despite having to endure hardship when you return to your home country, you will not suffer to any greater extent than you would in this country, and so unless you can provide a guarantor at this late time in the proceedings, I expect you to leave the country as scheduled by the end of the week.’

Tay’s mother was resigned by this point. Her last hope was gone, and her head dropped forwards, and I could hear her sobbing. I was about to urge my dad to stand up when I felt him moving next to me. He looked so tall standing above me, with his shoulders back and eyes forward.

‘Excuse me, your honour.’

The magistrate, who had been writing notes with his head down, avoiding the scene in front of him, looked up at the sound of my dad’s voice.

‘Yes?’

‘My name is Paul Milton. I’m a friend of the MacIntyre family. I will guarantee them.’

I wish I had a camera to capture the looks on the faces in front of us. The expressions were priceless.

‘Please approach the bench, Mr Milton. And you, too, Mrs MacIntyre. This is most unusual.’

As my dad approached the bench, Tay ran back down the court and grabbed me into a hug. I wanted to kiss him very hard there and then, but more pressing was the need to see what was going on at the front of the court. All we could hear were murmurs.

Occasionally one or other of my dad or Tay’s mum would nod their head. By the time they were done, the judge was smiling slightly, and seemed almost as though there were a tear in the corner of his eye.

Tay’s mum waited at the front of the court, supporting herself on the railing on front of the benches, and my dad came back to get Tay and I.

‘Come on, you two, you’d better get up front with us.’

‘Did you make it so we can stay?’ asked Tay. My dad nodded and smiled, and was rewarded by a huge, strong hug that knocked the wind out of him. I hugged him too, squeezing extra hard to let him know how much I loved him, and then we both ran off to hug Tay’s mum, and his little brother and sister, who were sitting there confused by the whole ordeal. The judge banged his gavel, and we all jumped slightly.

‘Order, please. In light of this rather late statement of guarantee, I will grant you permission to stay in the country until your youngest child has left school, Mrs MacIntyre, though the court will expect evidence of income as soon as you can possibly manage it. I will set visa review for one year’s time. Good luck, Mrs MacIntyre.’

Tay’s mum was crying now, and I could even see a little moisture in the corner of my dad’s eyes as she hugged him and thanked him over and over again. Tay and I were different. For us, it was release, a finality, a realisation that we could overcome. Slowly, deliberately, fully aware of our surroundings and not caring who saw, we leaned into each other and kissed passionately. I know several people gasped, I heard them, but right then I didn’t care. All that bothered me was that Tay was staying with me, that he would stay with me for the rest of my life.

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