It's strange to think, looking back on it, how much like a first
date that first time was. I mean, I got dropped off by my mum, we met
up in town wearing our best clothes, and went to the cinema together.
We even shared popcorn, though that probably had more to do with our
financial situations than anything else. I can't remember the film,
oddly, though I suspect it was some dumb action comedy, we always liked
those.
Michael was a school friend, my platonic relationship with whom was
encouraged by my mum and my brother - we happened to both have an older
brother three years ahead, and since our brothers were good mates, and
our mums had become friends in the way mums do, Michael and I were
almost destined to meet head on. We were both in the first year of
secondary school when we met, a mere eleven years old and still full of
all the self-belief engendered by being top of primary school, the big
kids. We hadn't yet worked out, a couple of weeks in to term, how small
and insignificant we were, and right now life was pretty good.
Mike and I knew each other well at school, and were both satellite
members of the same group of friends. What I mean by that is that we
hung around the edge, not sure enough of ourselves to get quite in the
middle, but accepted as long as we kept our mouths shut. I think that,
despite the fact that we acted like the big kids when it was just the
two of us, we were both horribly intimidated by the people around us.
They were a little bit more sure of themselves, a little bit bigger,
maybe, and a little cooler. Mike and I were, let's face facts here,
little geeks. I assimilated every single piece of information I ever
heard, as long as it came with a guarantee that it would never be
useful to me, and Mike had already been spotted in the library reading
a book for one of our first assignments. Perhaps that's why we suited
each other so well, and why, in the future, we could be so open with
each other without fear of reprisal.
Anyway, I'm wandering from the story somewhat. I was talking about the
first time Mike and I saw each other outside of school. The film was
unremarkable, as I've said already, apart from one incident which
really sticks in my mind as probably the most erotic thing that had
ever happened to me at that point in my young life. About half way
through the film I realised that the huge Coke I'd drunk was already
wanting to get out the other end, and I leaned over to tell Mike that I
was going for a piss. To my surprise, he said that he too needed to
pee, and would come with me.
Up to this point, I had never thought of myself as anything other than
a normal straight boy who was beginning to show a serious interest in
the opposite sex, but suddenly the thought of Mike coming with me made
my little dick swell a bit and push against the front of my jeans. It
wasn't big enough to cause a serious tent, but I was certainly
conscious of the feeling. When we made it to the toilets, I was both
surprised and excited to find that there were only two urinals right
next to each other and the stall was occupied, so Mike and I would have
to piss next to each other.
I could actually feel my heart beating faster in my chest as I unzipped
and pulled out my semi-hard dick, trying desperately to avoid getting
so hard that I couldn't go. At school, getting caught looking at
someone else's dick was social suicide, but here, away from it all with
someone I felt I could trust, I took the chance and glanced over. I
could just see the end of Mike's dick, soft and white, the foreskin not
quite as long and overhanging as mine but still there despite the fact
that, to my surprise and embarrassment, he was quite hard. I quickly
looked away, and thanked the spirits that I was finished weeing because
I instantly got the most painfully hard erection I had ever had.
Luckily it was fairly small back then - puberty's harsh touch was a
couple of years off yet - and didn't make itself known too strongly in
my jeans.
I hadn't actually met Mike's eyes the whole time, but when we made
contact on the way back into the cinema I could feel the blood rushing
to my face, colouring me crimson in an exact mirror of Mike's own
visage. That was as heated as it got for our first meeting, but a bond
had clearly formed between us. We ate our McDonalds chatting about the
film and generally enjoying each other's company, until my mum came to
pick us both up, whereon we spent the journey to Mike's house annoying
the hell out of her in our excitement, singing along badly to the radio
and generally being idiots. We were not cool kids, I can tell you that,
but we were uncool together and neither of us was about to judge the
other.
When we dropped Mike off, I was genuinely sad to see him walk away, but
was quickly carrying on the good work of bugging my mum, nattering on
about how great my time with Mike had been. She just looked at me with
that smile that mums have that says they know more about you than you
do right then, and drove me home.
At school Mike and I began to rapidly spiral away from all the other
kids and into each other. Yeah, we were there, taking part, playing
football at lunchtime, joining in the jokes, but we had our own private
world we would regularly escape into, and people began to notice. Being
an all-boys school, the homo jokes started up pretty quickly when it
was noticed how much time we spent together, but we knew the other kids
didn't really believe what they were saying, and after all we were both
normal anyway, so what did it matter what they thought? Mike and I were
happy with each other's company, and the bond between us grew stronger
every day.
We couldn't have been better friends, and looking back always makes me
wonder at the strength of that link. I've known love since Mike, but
never as pure, never so carefree and abandoned. Of course, for a long
while I had no idea it was love - there was so much to go through
before it became obvious that's what I felt.
The biggest change in those first few months came before Christmas,
shortly before the end of term. Mike was unusually excitable one day,
and I could tell he was dying to tell me something but wasn't allowed.
Somehow he managed to make it to the end of the day without spilling,
but when his mum turned up at the end of the day to pick us up and take
us swimming, a favourite activity of ours, he was immediately bugging
her to see if I could be told. With a weary smile and a sigh, his mum
said whatever it was had been finalised, and I could be told.
Mike was so excited that I was convinced that he was going to wet
himself, but he managed to maintain his continence and tell me that he
was moving house. At the time Mike lived about ten minutes away by car,
a good half an hour by bike taking the most direct route, and
considering how far I lived apart from most of my classmates that made
him practically a neighbour. My heart sank at the news - now I wouldn't
be so close to him. I could understand his excitement at moving
somewhere new, but at the same time I felt pretty sorry for myself.
Numbly I asked the requisite question concerning where he was moving.
The answer didn't actually register for a moment, because the way Mike
said it made it sound like some random road, but then it hit me. The
road he'd said, Parkinson Street, had exactly the same name as mine. I
looked over at him, on the back seat of his mum's car, and the grin
that he was wearing rapidly dissolved to make way for full on giggling.
That was the second moment, the next fall, another step closer to
realising what I felt for Mike. There he was laughing so hard it hurt
him, and all I could do was smile and watch him, a warm feeling
flooding through me.
I knew their new house quite well, actually. It was a few down from
mine, but built on the same plan, and my parents had been friends with
the couple who moved out. They had raised their kids in the village for
years, but now the children had all moved out and set up families of
their own, the old couple were making way for a new generation. And
that meant Mike would be just down the road. The best friend I had ever
had would be moments away whenever I wanted him. My heart soared,
though at the time I didn't really understand why, or for that matter
recognise the importance. All that mattered was that at last I would
have a real friend living nearby and my life would start to be normal.
Except that it was never going to be normal, was it? I was a little
freak (as opposed to the big freak that I am now), and Mike was just as
odd. We became more and more insular, more and more comfortable around
each other and no-one else. The closeness eventually began to creep
into the physical side of our relationship. We both had a need to feel
contact, and every so often - in celebration or in commiseration - when
we were alone we would hug. I loved the feel of holding him to me, and
for a while it was nothing more than a brotherly feeling, so we felt
fine with the expression. He was as skinny as I was, but somehow those
hugs were always warm and fulfilling.
That wasn't the limit of the comfort we felt around each other, either.
There would be times I would arrive at his house to be told by his mum
that he was in the shower, and she thought nothing of sending me up to
his room. There was no shyness in Mike's demeanour when he would get
dressed in front of me, and though I tried to be surreptitious, I
couldn't help but see the whole of him after a short while. Strangely,
because it was just so commonplace, not a moment of eroticism, I never
got hard during these encounters. The same would happen at my house,
Mike sitting at my desk looking at the latest model plane I was working
on and happily chatting away while I wandered around my room starkers,
trying to find a pair of pants to put on. We would never dare be so
open at school, changing for swimming lessons, but while we were alone,
the shyness evaporated.
The first time I looked at him in an erotic way was a few weeks short
of Mike's twelfth birthday. I remember the timing so vividly because
all he could talk about then was the new bike he was getting as a
present from his parents. He was doing the usual thing of chatting to
me stark naked, sat on his bed with his legs crossed and his crotch
wide open. He'd had a shower and couldn't yet be bothered to get
dressed, and there was nothing remarkable in this. What was entirely
new, though, was the way his dick slowly rose to attention as we
talked. Without appearing to notice, Mike's hand drifted into his
crotch and started fiddling with his dick. It was so blatant that I
stared, and when Mike realised I wasn't paying attention to the
conversation, he looked down at himself and then looked up with a
slightly shocked expression.
'Shit, sorry!' he said, pulling his hand away. I took a moment to
speak, but then decided honesty was the best way of saving a bit of
honour for Mike, which I wanted to do.
'It's ok,' I said, 'I do it all the time...'
'Really?' he asked. I nodded.
'Usually at night, when no-one else can see.'
Mike grinned.
'Do you ever do it when you're staying here?'
By now his hand had gone back to his crotch, and was definitely making
little up-and-down motions. The question had me cornered, too - I
certainly had done it at his, never to the point where I got the really
good feeling I'd discovered, but I'd certainly fiddled. I blushed and
nodded. Mike's grin grew even wider.
'I thought so! How long since you did it?'
'A couple of days.'
'You want to do it now?'
'What, in front of you?' I asked, incredulous.
'Well, I am...' Mike answered, making the point by thrusting his hips
into the air. His little dick stood proudly quivering, it's foreskin
drawn back as far as I'd ever seen it. 'You can if you want to.'
I was torn. On the one hand, I had to admit I was really hard, and
desperately wanted to wank, but then on the other hand it was quite
obvious that Mike's dick was a little fatter and a little longer than
mine, and I didn't want to be embarrassed. Horniness won out, though,
in the end, and I joined him on the bed, pushing my jeans and pants
down to my knees and grabbing my dick. I watched him as I wanked,
finding myself seriously aided in my ministrations by the sight of him
going at it.
He used a fairly similar two-fingers-and-thumb method to me, but with
him being right handed and me left, it looked strange. Mike was a lot
more vocal than I at that stage (though I would almost yelp later on in
our relationship when he did certain things to me), and panted and
grunted as he reached his climax, before going totally still as a
little spurt of semen flew from his dick onto his tummy. I couldn't
believe it! He could come! I knew exactly what it was from reading a
book my parents had thought would be more useful than a talk - and less
embarrassing for them - and Mike could do it! I was still totally dry,
and came almost painfully, my dick spasming but failing to release any
seed.
Neither of us commented on what had happened when we were done - we'd
both been spurred on by hormones, and now those feelings were
satisfied, we felt a bit silly. Without another word, we both got into
our clothes. Wanking together just seemed to become part of our
friendship after that. Without specifically making the arrangement to
do so, when we were together we'd both get into bed without our shorts
on and go at it under the covers.
The game escalated one night when Mike grabbed the flashlight we'd been
using to make shadows on the ceiling and disappeared under the covers,
watching me wank. I made a tent in the duvet by drawing my knees up and
opening them a bit, and Mike crawled into the space, flashlight pointed
at my crotch as he just watched me doing it. After a few minutes he
crawled out and handed me the torch, and went at it as I crawled under
the covers into that hot, fragrant space between his legs.
Watching close-up as Michael's hand went up and down was one of the
hottest things I'd ever seen, and I can still get hard just at the
thought of the smell and heat under the covers. I noticed his hole for
the first time too, exposed by his position, twitching in the most
remarkable way as he came, with that little spurt (getting bigger every
time) fired out onto his abdomen.
Michael always seemed to be the one with the ideas, the one with new
and more dirty things to try. It was he who showed me a picture he'd
found, a fragment of a porno, with a woman sucking a man. And it was
he, who, later that night as I watched him with the flashlight, lifted
up the covers (letting cold air in and the lovely smell of his sex out)
and told me to suck him. I told him that I would only do it if he did
it to me afterwards, and he eagerly nodded, hormones making the
decisions for him.
He took the torch then, coming under the covers with me, throwing them
over his head and plunging us both into darkness until he got the light
pointing the right way. He watched with a fascinated expression as for
the first time I took his dick in my hand. We'd never even wanked each
other, just progressed straight to sucking, and I was about to be the
first to do it. The smell of him grew really strong as I got closer,
and for the first time I realised he was slightly damp beneath his
foreskin. I really didn't want his piss in my mouth, but when I sniffed
it it seemed to be something else entirely, seemed to be the source of
the smell I so loved. So, with my heart absolutely pounding and my dick
soft with nervousness, I closed my mouth around his dick and sucked.
The first time was always going to be a bit rubbish, and it wasn't
helped by the fact that I hadn't worked out it was necessary to move my
head. Michael got the idea, though, instinctively thrusting his hips up
and down, taking his dick in and out of my mouth as I just supplied the
suction. I realised far too late that we'd made no plans for what was
going to happen when Mike came, and was rewarded with a jet of watery
semen, which I discovered tasted quite nice. I almost spat it out, but
I really did like the flavour and let it run around my mouth until I
swallowed it without a thought. Juvenile semen is so much sweeter than
adult semen, and to this day one of the greatest pleasures I have is
sucking one of the first emissions out of a boy. The flavour should be
bottled and sold.
Mike was worn out, and lying there with his eyes closed when I emerged
form the covers. I reminded him of his duty, but he was too far gone to
reciprocate, promising to do it next time before rolling over and
falling to sleep. I felt a bit hard done by, but I was still horny, and
so wanked myself off to the memory of the feeling of his hard shaft
tickling the back of my mouth.
Mike got his first hairs before I managed to make an emission of my
own. Here was I still absolutely bald and firing blanks, and he had
hairs and a couple of squirts of come. I noticed them one time while
watching him wank with the torch under the covers. We didn't always
suck, and I was just watching this time and waiting for his emission,
which Mike just accepted I would take off his stomach with a finger and
relish. I was getting nice and close to the action, when I tore my eyes
off Mike's dick to look at the way his scrotum (bigger than mine, and
crinkly and pink) was bouncing up and down. As my gaze returned to his
shaft, I glanced at the join of his dick with his body, and noticed a
few dark hairs. They were tiny and fluffy, looking like the fuzz he
already had had just thickened, but they were definitely hairs. He
grumbled when I stopped him for no apparent reason, and then gave a
little whoop of joy when I pointed them out. We spent the next half an
hour examining the hairs, and examining both our bodies for any more,
before we finally went to bed, our wanking session forgotten.
Ok, so it wasn't all sex. I know that's the way I describe it, and
truth be told we were horny little dudes, but there were times when we
were just friends, too. I've been in relationships where there's
nothing but the sex holding you together, and it's not healthy. Mike
and I withdrew into our own little world a little too far, I think, and
became like a double act. Where one would be, so would the other. We
rarely spent a night apart, and both sets of parents became aware that
perhaps something more than simple friendship was going on. By that, I
don't mean that they suspected what we were up to, but more that the
bond between us was far closer to twins than merely friends.
We started to speak our own language, almost, with code words for
practically everything. We levelled each other out at school, too; the
subjects in which I excelled - such as maths and the sciences - Mike
suddenly became a great deal more adept at, and the same went for
English, never really my strong suit but somewhere Mike flourished. We
strengthened the bond of our friendship through pain, with matching
scars applied to the palms of our hands with a cigarette lighter, and
still to this day there is a pure white mark on my right hand.
The end, well that's just abrupt. Those wounds have healed, but they
have scars of their own. At the time it pretty much tipped me over the
edge, and it was a few years before I was ready to rejoin normal
society. I wanted to tell you about the good bits, so I won't go into
lots of detail. Mike died aged thirteen, a victim of leukaemia. It was
fairly advanced by the time they discovered it, and for ages I wondered
how I'd not seen it, blamed myself for not knowing sooner. Maybe he
could have been saved, but I know now that it was unlikely. He passed
away a month after we discovered the problem, and without the other
half to my double act, I withdrew from that day forth. I didn't speak
again until I was nineteen, and the only thing capable of breaking my
silence was crying out at a beautiful boy not to kill himself. But
that's another story for another day.