The Diary of Rosalie Smith, Chapter 1

by Elise Olisbos

I'm trying to write this the way a teenager would; since I haven't been a teenager in awhile, I could be getting it wrong, but I do like trying, at least. Please note that I write a lot of 'story' and not a lot of fucking. If you're not into that, sorry.

Author's note: All the following is complete fiction and any similarities to real persons is coincidental..

May 6, 2002

My mother gave me this pink diary to write in. I hate pink. It's ugly, but maybe that's what she thinks of me. I don't care. I don't.

I was pregnant three weeks ago. I'm thirteen. My mom gave me this long boring speech about how disappointed she was in me and blah blah blah. "Rosalie," she said, really sharp, "Don't be like me. Don't make the same fucking mistake, kiddo."

Kids at school are laughing at me. Some girls bump into me in the halls and call me a slut. Brandon doesn't talk to me anymore.

I don't want to write in this stupid book.

July 5, 2002

I hate my mother so much! She's sent me to the fucking countryside. Fuck! There's nothing here! There's pigs and goats and a cow, oh my. My aunt Maribel's house, it's old and wooden and it smells funny. We're a million miles from the closest township. Township? Really? Give me a break.

Aunt Maribel dresses like she's in Hollywood, though, and not in the backwoods. She has these people come in and work on the farm for her. She's my mom's big sister. I think they're only half-sisters, my mom and her are nearly the same age too. Maribel is really weird. She smiles really wide and shows off all her white teeth.

And her daughter Dina is even worse. Actually... Dina isn't so bad. She's just quiet and pretty, and she's always reading and studying. Dina doesn't go to school. Aunt Maribel keeps her in the house, like... like Rapunzel or something.

July 17, 2002

Dina is so pretty. She's slender and pale, and she has long dark red hair. I'm skinny and short, and my hair never looks right. Dina looks like a model, and she has really big blue eyes.

I wish I looked more like her. I'm just Rosalie Smith with the curly brown hair.

Sometimes when I go to bed, I think about the baby I didn't get to have. Maybe if I was like Dina, it would have been alright. Dina wants to be a doctor. She's so smart. She told me she wants to go to community college next year. She's only a few years older than me, I think she's sixteen, but she acts older than her mother. More responsible and shit. She makes sure we all eat breakfast, and tells her mom not to smoke so much. I'm kind of pissed that I'm just now getting to spend a lot of time with her. She's amazing.

When I told her about how Brandon got me pregnant and didn't talk to me, not even when I lost the baby, she hugged me so tight. "Boys are shit," she said and kissed me on the cheek. My cheek was so warm for a long time, right where she pressed her lips to it. I wanted her to do that again... I just... I don't know. It just felt nice that someone as amazing as Dina would want to kiss a loser like me.

Aunt Maribel is kind of weird, but she's not bad. She wanted to be an actress, but her husband stuck her here on the farm before he died. She's a little crazy, but she tells the funniest jokes.

August 7, 2002

It's really quiet at night here. In the city, there's always traffic and police sirens and shouting from the apartment upstairs and it sounds stupid, but sometimes I can't fall asleep so easily here, because I can practically hear my brain ticking.

Dina and I were studying earlier. Who studies in the summer? My super-smart cousin, that's who. But we were reading some old English book and talking about it. It wasn't bad. Next week we're going to do some maths. When I get back to school, I'll be too smart to be fucking around.

I think Aunt Maribel is drinking, I can hear her down in the kitchen.

Hey there's a car outside. Wow, it's one of those new quiet ones, with the really bright bluish lights. My small room faces the long driveway, like Dina's beside it, and if I tip-toe, I can see over the edge of the roof. There's a tall woman coming out of the car.

Okay, I took a good long look and she's tall and skinny with lots of blonde hair piled up on her head. She's wearing really expensive clothes, and the front of her blouse is cut low, but she's not really young. Fifty-five, maybe sixty? Her breasts are big though. Breast-lift, whatever. I saw her face when the light from the opened door downstairs and her face is piled on with makeup.

I wonder who she is.

August 8, 2002

Last night was so so so weird. That lady, I could hear her and Aunt Maribel downstairs, talking. I heard the strange lady laugh, and Aunt Maribel sounded a little angry. Not really badly upset, more like... she just sounded sulky, like a little kid not getting their own way.

At the same time, I head Dina in her room next to mine, moving around. She sounded like she was getting ready to go out. Maybe the strange lady was taking her out somewhere? Where would they go in a backwards place like this?

Then I heard the lady and Maribel climbing the stairs. I put down the diary, turned off the little flashlight I was using so that Dina wouldn't know I was still up so late and come frown at me, and then jumped into bed, covering up and trying to breathe like I was sleeping.

I thought they were just going to go right past my room, but they stopped at my door. I nearly jumped up when my door opened, but I stayed still. My heart was beating really fast, though.

"Who is that?" I heard the strange woman say. She had a really raspy voice.

"My sister's daughter," Maribel said softly and there was a long silence. I barely stopped myself from flinching when I felt a hand rest on my cheek. It was kind of cold, and it trembled a little, but it smelled nice, like fresh flowers. The hand stayed there on my cheek for a little while, and then moved on to my hair, brushing at the curls. It felt really nice... comforting. My mom loves me, I guess, but she's kind of tough and harsh and she never ever hugged me or touched my hair or anything like that.

"She is really lovely," the woman said and I frowned slightly. Who, me? That couldn't be right. "What is her name?"

"Rosalie," Maribel answered quickly, her speech kind of slurred. "My sister said she's kind of a trouble-maker, but she's a good girl. Dina really loves her."

I went all warm and happy. I felt like my birthday and Christmas had come all at once.

Dina loves me. I think I love her too, so much. I think I might love her more than anything in the world.

"I can see why," the woman had said in her raspy voice. She removed her hand and left the room, and I heard Dina's room door creak open. I waited for a long time, staying motionless, because I could sense that Maribel was still in my room, or least at the doorway. I took a chance and peeked from underneath my eyelashes, and yep, she was still in my doorway, looking out into the narrow passageway.

Then she closed my door and I heard her cross the passage to her own room.

It was really quiet for a long while, and then I heard a faint sound coming from Dina's room. Really low. Sounded like when Dina was having her period and she was in bed groaning from pain. I heard her say, "Oh yes," really clearly, and then she called the woman's name a couple of times.

The name was Irene. Dina kept saying it quietly, and there was a lot of creaking and some more moaning. I opened my eyes and stared at the dark ceiling.

Dina was over there having sex with that woman. Shit.

I felt weird. I felt kind of upset, because I love Dina and I don't want anyone touching her, because I want to touch her, although I'm not sure how to do it. I mean, I've only ever fucked Brandon and it was three times. It had hurt the first time, a lot, but I thought I loved Brandon. The other two times weren't fun either, it always seemed like I wasn't really happy when it was all over, but at least I thought me and Brandon would be together forever.

I didn't love Brandon the way I love Dina though.

So I was upset. I wanted to cry.

But there was this fluttering feeling in my stomach and between my legs, every time Dina said, "Yeah, fuck, yes," and I turned over onto my belly and put the pillow over my head, trying to block out the sounds, even though they were being very quiet.

Why would Dina do something like that? And that lady was so old. It was a little gross, I thought, even though that woman called me 'lovely'.

I pressed my hips down and rubbed my... okay, my pussy against the bed. I feel a little weirded out writing that down, but that's what is is. It felt good. Dina's bed is right against the wall in her room, like mine is, so basically our beds are side to side with only a wall separating them. She went, "Oh, oh, oh," just like that, little breathless sounds and I kept rubbing off on the bed, gripping on the sheets and panting like a dog.

Now, I could hear the woman groaning too, and she went, "Dina, oh god, sweetheart," before she grunted sharply and made a high-pitched sound. I closed my eyes and shook a little, feeling something kind of rushed and hot bloom in my belly.

I rolled over and tried not to breathe so hard. I heard them whispering and murmuring, and I fell asleep with my pussy all tingling and soft and wet.

When I went to breakfast this morning, I was expecting that woman, Irene, to be there, but it was only Maribel at the table, reading some year-old fashion magazine while Dina was flipping some pancakes. Her red hair was in a braid down her back and she looked normal in a t-shirt and faded shorts cut from an old pair of jeans. I felt my face heat when she looked at me curiously.

"Lee?" She said in her soft, calm voice, and smiled briefly at me. "Ready for breakfast?"

I don't know why she started calling me 'Lee', but I really liked that she did. It made me feel special, so I tried to hide my awkwardness and nod. She placed a plate in front of me as I sat down and placed her hand on my shoulder for a brief moment before she went back to the stove.

Maribel, she just turned a page and went on reading. The whole place was quiet and calm, and as I chewed my pancake, I thought about going back to school in the fall.

Dina grinned at me as she sat down with her own pancake, no matter how strange last night was, I felt I could stay here for a long time.

continued soon