Weaving
olden
dances Mingling
hands
and
mingling glances Till
the
moon
has taken flight To
and
fro we
leap And
chase
the
frothy bubbles Whilst
the
world
is full of troubles And
is
anxious
in it's sleep Come
away
oh
human child To
the
waters
and the wild For
the
world's
more full of weeping Than
you
can
understand W. B. Yeats
When we were
taking over the shop and forming our corporation, one of my
stipulations in putting up the money was Dad Jake would be taken in as
an equal partner. Everyone agreed, plus I agreed to foot the bill
for operating expenses for the first six months. When we called
him in to tell him, he thought we were going to fire him because we
wouldn’t need him any more. I razzed his ass mercilessly about
not having faith in his boy. He cried when we told him he would
be an equal partner. He stood to make twice as much money as he
did in the past and needed it as Anita gave birth to their seventh
child, a beautiful boy, about a year and a half before. She was
in poor health.
The child was
named Samuel Beaureguard Redfeather Raggazzi. We jokingly called
him Little Red Sambeau, but he was known as Little Beau. Over the
years his brothers and sisters started calling him ‘Little Beau
Peep.’ As often happens, a silly nickname will stick. He
was good natured about it even when the adults started calling him
‘Peeps.’ So he was known as ‘Little Beau’ or ‘Peeps.’ The
Dungeon Master, Master Earl, Chief, and I were his Godfathers. We
attended his Baptism. Master Earl was on patrol and had to attend
the service in his uniform.
The attending
Priest didn’t know what to think. “Now, let me see if I understand
this,” the priest said and paused for a minute to muse to himself,
“this boy child will have four Godfathers; one’s a giant, one’s an
Indian Chief, one’s an Los Angeles Police Officer, and the fourth is a
Vietnam war hero and body builder?” the Priest asked laughing and
added, “Lucky Little boy, he must be very special,” he allowed.
We assured him he was.
Anita was
already going through menopause when she got pregnant. Every
physician they consulted advised against having the baby. They
told her she must abort. It was just too risky. Being a
good Catholic she wouldn’t hear of it. There were complications,
and she never fully recovered. She remained ill and in poor
health until she died two years later.Dad Jake never
married again. He and I continued to carry on with each other
once or twice a month in a small apartment at the back of the shop
Chief and I fixed up for emergency sleep-overs in Silverlake. My
master knew if I worked late, chances were Dad Jake was going to tear
off a piece of my ass. Master Earl never got upset or tried to
stop me from giving Jake comfort. He considered Jake a part of my
extended family and included him in a lot of things at the house.
Jake loved my master and was grateful to him for his graciousness and
generosity.
Jake was left
with seven kids and no wife. Master Earl, Chief, the Dungeon
Master, and even Master Jeb helped out as much as we could. The entire
family helped Jake out at one time or another. He finally hired a
lady in the neighborhood to take care of the two smallest ones and his
sister helped as much as she could. His oldest daughter graduated
high school and was still living at home. She took over a lot of
responsibilities.
After Master
Earl’s death and my head was retrieved from my ass, I became the
Dungeon Master’s property and we lived together for a number of years
on Mt. Washington. It wasn’t far from Dad Jake’s and we were all
the time taking the kids somewhere to give him a break. Chief and
I would go over a couple of times a week and help out with laundry,
cooking, and cleaning. If he and the Dungeon Master had any
slaves in training they were taken along for “Community Service
Work.” At least that’s what we told them. No one ever
complained. Everyone was glad to help out. Anything that
needed to be done we tried to do to help. The Ragazzi kids began
to think of the Mt. Washington clan as family. We practically
raised those kids.
The favorite of
everyone was the baby of the family, Little Beau. He quickly
learned who Chief, Big Jim, Earl, and I were and our relationship to
him as his Godfathers. He became the Mt. Washington and our
family mascot. He was riding on a Harley before he could
walk. Half his clothes and toys were on the mountain. Any
of the family who came to visit always brought a gift or toy for Little
Beau.
Little Beau was
our constant companion and helper. He could get us to do anything
by batting his big brown eyes. He looked a lot like his
mother. Peeps was even tempered and loved everyone. He was
almost too pretty too be a little boy, but he exuded a masculinity that
was as powerful as his old man’s. He had the prettiest long eye
lashes that curled up like someone used a curler on them and he got
teased unmercifully in school; however, he was so quick witted, good
natured, and laid back he never took offense. He was soon one of
the most popular kids in his school.
I loved him from
the minute I laid eyes on him as a baby. I knew he would be
special. I also knew by the time he was five years old he was
going to grow up gay. I talked to Jake and asked him if he was
showing Little Beau enough attention. I warned him all the signs
were there. He must do something. He was the only one who
could show him the masculine love that baby needed. I preached to
him until he’d get so angry he’d shake his fist at me and curse in
Italian. I’d yell back at him, “Well, if you didn’t want us to
care for Peeps you shouldn’t have made us his Godfathers, but you did,
we are, so live with it,” I'd shout at him. He’d think about it
for a while then we’d break up laughing at the absurdity of it
all. Maybe little Beau was genetically meant to be gay, who
knows? Jake tried but he just had real problems showing the child
affection because he secretly blamed Little Beau for Anita’s
death. The kid knew it, too. He had a brain up in lights.
Little Beau
attached himself to us. He slowly grew apart from his father but
loved him deeply. He just didn’t know how to get his dad to love
him. He couldn’t. He tried everything in his power to gain
his old man's love. As he grew into young manhood he developed
the body of a young God; dark, swarthy olive complexion, a face by
Michelangelo, and like his old man, a sizable member between his
legs. He was one of the most popular kids in his high
school. The girls adored him and so did the boys. He could
do no wrong. He wanted to be good at sports and made Chief and I
teach him how to play ball. He was forever hounding us to
play catch with him. He got to be pretty good. He was on
the team in high school and Chief, Big Jim, and I never missed a game.
We had to
physically drag Jake to a game. He didn’t want to go. He
just didn’t care. Little Beau was crushed. He’d done all
this so his dad would be proud of him. He was a better athlete
than any of his brothers. We would brag about a play he made,
Peeps would be beaming from the praise and his dad would shoot him
down. “It was okay, but your brother could have done better,"
he'd tossed of thoughtlessly. Jake could be mean spirited and
hearless sometimes. The truth of the matter was, his brother
couldn’t have done better. I chewed that old man’s ass out until
he couldn’t believe some of the words that came out of his adopted
son’s mouth. I told him I was ashamed to call him my dad
anymore. He got the message, especially after I cut off sex with
him.
I finally told
Little Beau to give up. If his dad was to come around he would
but Peeps had to let go for his own sake. By the time he got to
secondary school we offered him a place to live on the mountain with
us. He thought about it, thanked us graciously, but couldn't
bring himself to leave his old man. The kid even went so far as
to try to take the place of a wife for Jake. He learned to cook
and had dinner waiting for his dad every evening he was in high school. He washed his
dad’s clothes, folded them, put them away. He saw me taking care
of my master's boots and asked me to teach him how. He kept all
of his dad's boots clean and polished. He washed and waxed his
dad’s truck every week. He mowed the lawn, did yard clean-up
around the house, fixed, painted and generally ran the house.
His
dad never even offered him an allowance. His Godfathers slipped
him money on the side. I gave him money. Chief gave him
money. Big Jim gave him money. Each time he would
faithfully tell us, “But Beau— Big Jim and Chief have already given me
money.”
"Damn, it.
Keep a' you mouth shut, caro mio, and take it,” I admonished him in my
best Godfather imitation. I’d stuff it in his pocket. It
always got me a hug and a kiss. He graduated from high school
second in his class of four hundred students. His dad announced
he wasn't going to the graduation. Chief, the Dungeon Master, and
I told him if he wanted to live to see the sun rise the next day, there
would be no argument, he would get dressed appropriately, and be ready
at the appointed time. We would escort him to make sure he
attended, if we had to tie him to a chair and throw his big wop-ass,
chair and all, in the back of my master's truck.
Jake was smart
enough to know when we meant business, but what really convinced him
was the anger Chief radiated toward him. He never saw Godfather
Chief really angry before. With no emotion, Chief asked Jake if
he ever saw pictures of a man who was scalped? "It ain't pretty,
Jake," he said. Later Jake told
me he never wanted to see Chief angry again either. He was scared
to death that big Indian was going to scalp him if he didn’t do as we
told him. I would have handed Chief the knife.
We took Little
Beau to a lot of the family gatherings over the years. He knew
the score and had no problem throwing his clothes off with me, Charlie,
Blaine, the eunuchs, Will, and Button. (he loved Button) All the
family knew and loved him. We don’t know how they found out, but
there was a contingency of about fifty bad ass bikers attended his
graduation who stood and yelled for him when he walked across the stage
to get his diploma. His dad was impressed these guys thought
enough of his kid to come to his graduation. Little Beau was
thrilled beyond words they came and were carrying him around on their
shoulders afterwards. It did a lot for his image among his peers
as well. His classmates were impressed.
Several years
after his graduation we sold the house on Mt. Washington and bought a
huge estate in San Diego County with several houses and big garages
with apartments over them. Little Beau was still living with his
dad and playing housewife. His dad took him for granted.
Little Beau helped us move and was around us a lot that month. He
always insisted he be home for his dad to take care of him. He
did spend several nights away with us in San Diego with his dad’s
permission. Here he was twenty-one and still asking his dad’s
permission for every move he made. He never complained. He
just gaciously accepted it was his lot while living in his father's
house.
That weekend I
asked him what he wanted to do with his life. He told me he
wanted to go to college to become a veterinarian, but his dad said it
would be too expensive. We knew Jake put four of the kids through
college with no sweat. They weren’t half as intelligent or bright
as Little Beau. They didn’t made near the grades Beau made in high
school. Jake was making damn good money from the shop.
We were
approached by a larger firm to buy us out at a huge profit so we
decided to sell. We all could retire from what we got. Jake
ended up with enough to be comfortable the rest of his life but
wouldn’t agree to put the kid through college. Partner or no I
was about ready to write Jake off. I was angry. Chief was
angry. The Dungeon Master was livid. I asked one question
of them both and before I could get it out of my mouth they both yelled
an answer in unison.
“What if we...?”
“Yes!”
they exclaimed in reply.
We simply moved
Little Beau in with us and told his father he would be attending U.S.C.
(San Diego) in the fall for Veterinary Medicine. If he wanted to
see him he would have to come down. Jake didn’t seem to care one
way or the other. Except now, he was alone. Once in a while
we’d get a phone call from Jake in an evening to see how we were doing
but never ask a word about Little Beau. We didn't let his
incurious behavior put us off, we would tell him about Little Beau; he
was doing well and making top grades. We were so proud of
him. Jake never once asked to speak to the boy. Little Beau
finished his freshman year at the top of his class and we couldn’t have
been happier.
We bought him a
small car and he loved it. He was beginning to have sex with guys
and wanted to know if we would. We told him we didn’t think it
would be a good idea because we were his Godfathers and so close to his
old man but we had no problem with him finding someone else in the
family. He picked old
Sarge to fall in love with as a Master/mentor. Wouldn’t you
know? Titus and Button welcomed him into the family. That
dirty old man, Sarge, taught the kid about good sex. How to give
it, and how to take it. He taught him well, and I’ll have to give
the old fart his due, no one could have done it better than Sarge.
I spent many a
wonderful, happy evening riding his cock calling him every name that
came to my head to get him to fuck me harder. He never let me
down. Then he’d have me trade places with him. He’d get in the
sling, and I’d slam my old dick into him as hard as I could. Then
he’d tell me I could come up his butt but if I didn’t get him off the
second time when I shot he was going to cut my dick and balls
off. I never failed him either. We laughed for years ‘til
he passed away about our bonding and the sex games we played together.
I told everyone
I had no doubt that filthy old pervert would do exactly what he said he
was going to do to me so I had to bust his ass to make sure he got what
he needed. Then we’d both roar with laughter. God, I loved
that man. I cried more at his funeral than I did my
Masters. Why? Because I learned to let go; how to get it
out. I had to, my love, Big Beryl wasn’t around any more to take
me to the barn.In memory of one
of the finest men I ever knew or played with, Sarge was a man among
men. I miss him today with all my heart, and I can’t stop the
tears as I write this. Under that gruff, mean, foul mouthed,
facade beat the heart of one of the kindest, gentlest, caring, giving
men I ever had the pleasure to know.
I accompanied
Little Beau to Los Angeles to visit his father the end of his freshman
year at U.C.S.D. His grades were tops in his class. I left
him with his dad and went to visit friends. Bull and Charlie were
moving to the San Diego area to be nearer to us. I spent several
days
with them helping pack and and several with Sam and Doctor
Yoshie. I had a good time. I called Jake’s house and Little
Beau answered. He was reserved, and said he was ready for
me to pick him up. I drove by and Jake was all over me hugging
and kissing me. He said he was so glad to see me again. I
noticed as we left Jake never tried to hug Little Beau, give him a
kiss, or tell him ‘goodbye.’ I just figured they said their
‘goodbyes’ before I got there.
Little Beau got
into the truck and quietly closed the door to wait for me. It was
a quiet, introspective ride back to San Diego. I wanted to reach
out to him but I didn’t know how. I decided to let things be and
be there if he needed me. Just beyond San Clemente near the
nuclear reactors Little Beau kept looking at the ocean with his face
turned away from me. It was getting dark, but I could
occasionally see his face reflected in the window. There were
tears running down his cheeks, but he didn’t want me to see he was
crying. I pulled off into a rest area near the San Onofre
Beach. I got out, used the head and came back to the truck.
I went to the passenger side and told him to get out, we were going to
take a walk. He looked like a seventy-five year old man who had
the burdens of the world on his little shoulders.
I made him take
his boots off. I took mine off and we threw them behind the seat
. We walked down to the ocean and hand in hand walked along the
beach in the sand with water coming up to our feet every now and
then. He wouldn’t talk. A full moon was rising and we were
walking far away from the few on the beach. I knew the child, the
boy, the young man walking beside me so well he could’ve been my own
son. In many ways I felt he was. I certainly wished he was
my progeny. My heart ached for him, but I didn’t know what to
do. What could I say to him. I was his dad's part-time
slave for years. Jake freely gave me the love Peeps wanted for
himself.
I’ve always been
told to follow my heart. I grabbed him, pulled him to me, and
kissed him hard with a tender, lingering kiss. At first he was
shocked and a bit surprised. He stiffened but then relaxed and
allowed himself to flow into his Godfather. He knew I understood
without saying a word. It opened the flood gates on both sides of
the damn. His and mine. We were reduced to holding each
other and letting it all come out. Our tears mingled with the
same salinity as the ocean waters that washed against our bare
feet. I gently let him go and held him at arms length to speak to
him.
“Peeps, I don’t
care what happened. I don’t wanna’ know. I’d probably go
back and kick the worthless old bastard’s ass, but one thing you have
to know is you have a large family, natural and extended, who love and
care for you. I ain't just talking about your Godfathers but your
brother’s and sister’s too. There ain’t a week goes by we don’t
get a call from one or all of them wanting to know how you’re doing and
if they can help in any way. Hell, they’ve been down here to
visit us and you more’n they have your old man. I am and always
will be your number one fan and cheering section. I am, after
all, your Godfather. Chief is number two and the Dungeon Master
is number three. Sarge is a close runner up,” I said. He
laughed. He looped his elbow through mine and we walked some more
down the beach.
“Nothing
happened, Beau,” Peeps said quietly, “absolutely nothing. If he
had been mad at me for something it would have been all right, but
there was nothing.” He broke into tears as we walked. “I cleaned the
house. I fixed breakfast, lunch, and dinner for him. I
washed his clothes. I cleaned and shined all his boots. I
washed and waxed his truck. I cleaned up the yard. He
didn’t thank me for anything. Never said I did a good job or even
a bad one. He just doesn’t love me, Beau, and I have always tried
hard to win his love. I guess I just realized this weekend, I
can’t do it any more, Beau. I just don't wanna' try no more,” he
said. He was devastated. I was too. I couldn’t
imagine what had come over the man, Dad Jake, who I knew and loved all
those years. To do this to his own flesh and blood. Why
didn’t he just tell the kid to fuck off, I don’t want to be bothered by
you anymore. It would be kinder than what he was doing to him.
“What did he do
while you were there, Beau?” I asked him.
“Nothing but
watch television. He never talked to me. Never said more
than a handful of words and several grunts. Even when we
ate he never asked how I was doing in school. Nothing. Just
got up, put his plate in the sink and went back to his T.V. I
tried to talk to him several times, but he hushed me up telling me he
wanted to see what was on T.V. I gave up. I went and found
something else to clean. That was my vacation with my dad, Beau.”
He kind of giggled a disappointed little laugh. “I don’t know what I
expected. He never has paid any attention to me,” Peeps lamented.
“Look, I told
you to stop trying. Next time don’t “do” for him. Just sit
and make him nervous. Just be strong and sit there until you get
a reaction, then go from there. Beat him at his own sick
game. I’ve known your dad a hell of a lot longer than you, and I
know what pulls his strings.”
“Beau? Why
does my dad love you so much? He brightens up every time you come
around. He’s never done that for me. Did you and my dad
have a ‘thing’ at one time?” he asked.
“By ‘thing,’ do
you mean sex?” I asked in reply.
“Yes, sir,”
Peeps replied.
“We’ll, I’m too
damn mad at your dad to protect him any longer, and you know me so well
you’d know in a minute if I lied to you; besides you’re old enough you
deserve to know truth. Yes, we did. For many years, I was
your dad's part-time slave. We never crossed the barrier between
gay and straight. He was a straight master who liked to use and
be serviced by a male slave. While we loved each other deeply we
approaced it from different prespectives. Didn't matter.
What mattered was we meet in the middle and it worked for us. I
serviced your dad two to three times a week up until Master Earl was
killed. My master knew about Jake and my bond and accepted your
dad as part of our family. I won’t lie to you, Peeps, ‘cause I’ve
come to love you more than I ever loved your dad and that was a
powerful lot at one time.
"There was a
small single apartment at the back of the shop which hadn’t been used
for years. Sam originally fixed it up for Yoshie to hide in when
he first escaped Breed years ago. Chief and I fixed it up, ‘cause
it had an outside entry and we could use it if we got stuck in
Hollywood for the night. Or Chief could use it if he didn’t want
to bring a trick back to Mt. Washington, he could take him there.
We painted, redid the floor and made it comfortable. We put an
air conditioning unit for comfort and redid the bath to make it
nice. Someone could have lived there. After I showed it to
your dad, he and I started to use it after work when our schedules
allowed. Maybe twice a week, sometimes three I took care of him
all those years. I haven’t been with him since you were in junior
high school and I saw what he was doing to you. I’m sorry Beau
but I love you deeply and just couldn’t have sex with Jake while I
watched him reject you,” I said.
“I never
knew. Now it makes things more clear. I would’ve never
guessed you and my dad...” he couldn't finish.
“Don’t hate me,
Darlin,’ I couldn’t stand that. It would break my heart, I
love you so much,” I said. I held him tightly in my arms.
“I don’t, Beau,
but it does tell me something. He’s still in love with you, and
I’m just an echo of that love. I killed his wife and then I
destroyed your love for him. No wonder he hates me,” he said and
started crying again.
“I promise you,
Peeps, I’ll make it up to you somehow,” I said to him.
“You already
have, Beau. Look what you’re doing for me. You guys are so
kind and giving. I can’t even look at something I might like or
one of you will buy it for me. No young man could ask for better
Godfathers but you’re more like three big brothers. Hell, I love
you guys like I could never love my old man. You guys were always
there if I needed anything or a shoulder to cry on. I didn’t
realize until I was older how many weekends you guys gave up to see to
my happiness. You guys became my dads. I wanted dad to love
me. I wanted to love him, but it’s hard when you get nothing in
return, Beau,” he said through his tears. I held him as he cried
some more. “Tell me, Beau?” He looked at me with those killer brown
eyes of his. “If you had sex with my old man, why won’t you ‘get down’
with me?” he asked. He was right. He had me by the
gonads. If I really loved him as I claimed why was I denying him
what he probably needed from me?
“Would it help
if we were intimate?” I asked softly and stole a kiss from him.
“I need to be
loved this evening. I need love from someone, and I’d rather it
be you than any person on this Earth,” he said.
“You know what,
Tiger? I need you, too,” I replied. We kissed again.
I’d never been intimate with Little Beau before that evening, but I
felt we both needed it. I stopped and got us a motel room in
Carlsbad and called back to Bear Park. (our name for our place) I told
my master we were stopping for the night, ‘cause we were tired.
Neither wanted to drive any more. There was a show on cable I didn’t
want to miss. My master knew me so well by that time he
understood from a few well chosen words it was a ‘situation.’
“Ya’ll have fun
now, y’hear?” the Dungeon Master said laughing as he hung up the
phone. My master knew me too well and understood Peeps needed
me. Little Beau and I made love five times that
night. He couldn’t get enough, and I couldn’t fill him
enough. Sarge is one hell of a teacher. I bought him a box
of those god-awful cigars he loves after that night with Peeps but
never told him why. Little Beau and Big Beau fell in love that
night. We bonded and I knew I would never let anything bad happen
to him again as long as I was alive. He slowly became more our
son than he was Jake’s. I wasn’t going to let Jake hurt him
anymore either.
The end of
Little Beau’s Sophomore year came and went. That summer he spent
with us or the family. I occasionally had sex with him. The
Dungeon Master and Chief began to use him every now and then. He
was learning that sex didn’t mean you had to latch on to everyone who
made a night of love to you. I don't know who he learned it
from. Maybe Sarge? He didn’t learn it from me. I
still fall in love with anyone who throws a decent fuck in me.
So, I’m weak. Peeps never once mentioned going to see his dad
that summer. The phone calls from Jake became more
infrequent. The oldest daughter called and said he was miserable
because Little Beau didn’t call or come to visit.
“Good, serves
him right,” I told her then I laughed. She didn’t want to agree
but her giggle told me volumes. Jake’s kids knew what he did to
Little Beau and tried to talk with him. They all expressed their
disappointment the way he treated Little Beau. Then she said, “I
think he’s gonna’ drive down to visit Little Beau.” I told her fine,
we’d love to see him. He was certainly welcome. Two days later I
got a call from Jake asking if he could come down to visit?
“Sure come on
down, we got plenty of room. Stay as long as you like,” I said.
I gave him
instructions how to get to our place and he found it with no
problem. I was so proud of Little Beau. His dad arrived but
he didn’t run to him as usual. He walked into the room after his
dad was there for a while and simply said with no emotion, “Hi,
dad,”and walked on through to the kitchen to get a cold drink. He
came back in and asked his dad if he could get him anything.
“No thanks,
Son,” Jake replied quietly.
“Okay,
fine. You plan on staying for a while?” Peeps asked.
"Yeah, if your
Godfathers will let me. I might say the night," Jake replied.
"That's
good. Well, have a good time, and it was nice to see you again,"
Peeps said without nuance, turned, and went back to his room.
Jake was visibly shaken. I looked at him with sympathy and just
shook my head.
“I need you
guy’s help,” Jake said in a low voice. I was afraid of what was
coming. I had an ominous feeling, and I couldn’t have been more
right.
“Have I totally
blown it with Little Beau?” Jake asked quietly.
I wasn’t going
to coddle him. “Damn near, dad. Yeah, I’d say you’ve managed to
kill ninety-five percent of any love he had for you and it’s real hard
for any of us to have much sympathy. We warned you for
years. Do you remember the arguments you and I got into about
showing him love when he was just a toddler? You wouldn’t
listen. What were we to do? I wasn’t going to sit by and
watch you destroy our Godson. The only Godson, Big Jim, Chief,
and I may ever have.”
“You don’t have
all the pieces. You don’t know everything,” Jake countered.
I didn’t like the sound of that, but I had to know. I let him
take the lead. If he wanted to tell us he would. At that
point I really didn't give a damn and I knew my brothers felt the
same. They were as disgusted with him as I was. Sarge was
visiting in Little Beau’s room. They were making plans for going
to the
next family get-together in the desert.
Jake continued,
“I blamed him for Angie’s death for years. (Anita Angela was his
wife's two first names) I couldn’t look at him when I didn’t see her
face. He looks just like her. He has the face of an angel,”
Jake said and started crying. I didn’t move to console him.
As far as we were concerned it was too little too late. Neither
did Chief, Blaine, or the Dungeon Master try to console him. “As time
went on I couldn’t show him love because it was like I wanted to love
him like I loved Angie or you, Beau. I wanted to hold him and
have sex with him from the time he was in grade school. When he
started puberty I caught him jacking off one afternoon. I almost
went in to lay down with him to help him. I wanted to hold him
and make love to him while he was doing it. I wanted to catch him
in my mouth. I know it sounds sick, but I’m being honest here,”
Jake was doing true confession number but none of us were buying it; at
least for the moment.
I couldn’t
believe what I was hearing and then I remembered my own dad catching me
jacking off to Billy’s picture and asking if he could help. Six
degrees separation of probability? Maybe less than that? I
suddenly began to see things in a new light. He fell deeply in
love with his own son and didn’t know what to do about it.
There's no doubt it would produce a major conundrum in someone like
Jake. He knew society wouldn’t accept incest. Hell, it has
a hard enough time with homosexuality let alone to lust after your own
son. He bottled up all this without talking to a soul? He
could have talked to me of all people. No, he couldn’t
have. He knew how much we loved Little Beau and we took our
God-parenting roles seriously.
Jake continued,
“When he comes home he acts like a slave to me. I remember you
and Chief talking about Will and all the things he used do for you
guys. Your descriptions of what a slave should be stuck in my
mind, and then I realized I unwittingly turned my own son into a slave
without the sex; however, for lack of a better term, it was barren, it
was lifeless. It was frightening, because the truth is, I wanted
it all with him,” he declared. I looked at
Chief and then the Dungeon Master for help. They were staring at
the floor and wouldn't look at me. Blaine shrugged his shoulders
but didn’t look sympathetic. I was stunned. What do you say
to someone who has asked for your help and thrown you the curve of a
life time? Then, I thought, why didn’t you see this coming,
Beau? You’ve known that old man for years, but you never figured
him to be an uncaring man especially to his own child. Something
had to be desperately wrong. Well, there it was. Staring
you in the fucking face. You just found out. Now, what the
hell are you going to tell him?
Jake went on,
“He can walk by me and his scent causes me to get erect. Not just
a little. I mean a fucking boner hard, Beau, like I used to get
with you. He has a scent just like Anita's. How is that
possible? He doesn’t use colognes or soap like she used. He
doesn’t use deodorant or hair spray like she use to. No talcs or
bath powders. No bath oils, nothing. I’ve checked
everything. How can a male child have the same damn scent his
mother had? Explain it to me if you can?” Jake asked like he was
trying to make sense of something he put off far too long.
I didn’t have an
answer. I’ve pondered the role of pheromones in sexual attraction
for years but found no answers. Except, I noticed of late the
same scent from my giant Master Earl used to have just before he wanted
sex from me. Now, I can tell when the Dungeon Master requires my
services. I don’t even have to ask. I just start taking off
anything not going to be used in sex. He asked me one day how I
always knew. I told him a slave has ways of knowing those things
about his master. That scent is not from an aftershave.
It’s a sexual scent. Like my beast is getting ready to go into
rut. I can smell it in his urine. About a week ago I passed
Chief and got the same scent from him. Blaine was gone for a week
visiting with Josh, Zack, and Will in the desert. I pulled Chief
aside and asked him, “Your room, twenty minutes? Meet you there?”
I asked.
“I’d really
appreciate it, Beau,” he replied with kind of an urgent tone to his
voice. I was there stripped, clean, and ready for use. He
didn’t even say a word. He knew what I was there for and couldn’t
get it into me fast enough. He used me as the slave I was
intended to be. Damn good, too, I might add. My Indian
brother could still bring a satisfied smile to this old slave’s
face. Later that afternoon I was doing something and humming away
while working. My Master passed by me then stopped. “Chief?” he
asked.
“Yes, Master,” I
replied still working away.
“Fine,” he said
and walked on smiling to himself. Now, how did he know? He
couldn’t tell me either. Could it be the same? Could it be
our bodies produce one or the other pheromones depending on the role we
need to play in sex. Is the male of our species capable of
producing both? Was Little Beau's psyche controlling his
phereomones to duplicate his mother's so he might unwittingly tempt his
dad into having sex with him. Flowers have been doing it for eons
evolving to imitate the female scent of an insect needed to pollinate
the flower; and the male insect, in his attempt to have sex with what
he thinks is another female of his species, unwittingly pollinates the
plant. Stranger things have been noticed about the human body’s
ability to produce scents.
“Dad,” I spoke
softly to Jake trying to think, “Are you trying to tell us you feel so
strongly drawn to Beau you couldn’t have met a middle ground with your
son?” I asked incredulously.
“You know me,
Beau, that afternoon I asked if you were free to let me come by your
apartment I knew if you let me I was gonna’ fuck the daylights out of
you. I
couldn’t hold back. I’ve never been able to hold back with
you. I would go with you right now if your master let me and you
wanted me. God—forgive me Jim— I’ve missed you in the last eight
years like you can’t imagine. I’ve even gone to a couple of gay
bars looking for a replacement but never left with anyone. I knew
to show Little Beau any affection I was going to go too far. I
wanted him so bad I just closed up when I was around him,” Jake said.
About that time
Sarge walked in to say ‘goodbye.’ He told us he would talk with
us before the weekend. I introduced him to Jake and he shook his
hand. “Mr Raggazzi, you have one hell of a fine young man for a
son. He’s a good boy. You should be proud of him,” Sarge
said firmly. Jake thanked him and I walked Sarge to the
door. I kissed Sarge on the cheek and told him he would never
know how much I loved him for what he just said to Little Beau’s
dad. I told him I would fill in the details later. I walked
back into the living area and told Jake I had to think about this, but
in the meantime let’s get him comfortable. Blaine and I had to
start dinner. We were on K.P. that evening.
“To be perfectly
honest with you, dad, I don’t know what to say," I said, "Am I
shocked? No, not really. Does it bother me? Only in
the sense that I don’t have an honest answer for you as to how I feel
about it. I haven’t had much time to think. Can we just
leave everything on hold right now and give me a chance to think?
I want to put in a call to Master Wolf for his opinion. He helped
me a lot recently, and I want to hear his take on this. Can we
get together again after dinner and talk? We won’t say anything
to Little Beau about this and you shouldn’t either until we’ve had a
chance to talk among ourselves. Dad, we’re not here to be your
judge or jury. You and I should be the last ones to judge
anyone. Look at the clandestine love you and I shared for each
other all these years.”
Jake agreed to
wait until after dinner to pursue the conversation. I immediately
put in a call to Master Wolf and got his slave Zane on the phone.
He said he was with a client but would have him give me a call as soon
as he was finished. I told him it was somewhat of an
emergency. Blaine and I began to cook dinner and Little Beau came
to the kitchen with no clothes on to help like he always did. I
pulled him aside. “Peeps, do your old Godfather a favor and go
put some clothes on since your dad is here, for his benefit,” I asked
him quietly. He thought I meant because Jake wasn't used to
seeing his kid run around a houseful of grown men in the nude. “After
he’s gone you can go back to being comfortable,” I consoled him.
He started to say something and then stopped. “Yes, Master Beau,”
he replied quietly and trudged off to cover himself.
“Was he being a
smart-aleck, Blaine?” I asked.
“Don’t think so,
Love. I think he sees you as his Godfather/Master. That kid
would jump through flaming hoops for you and never ask why; with good
reason, I might add. You’ve never lied to him or told him you
were gonna’ do something and didn’t, or ask anything of him that wasn’t
for his own good. Shit. Not only him, Darlin,’ I’d
jump through them flaming hoops if’n you merely suggested it would be a
good idea,” Blaine said and we shared a good laugh at his joke, “You’ve
never told me to do anything or asked anything of me unless it was for
a damn good reason; in Nam or here. I would trust anything you
told me to do in a New York minute,” he added. The phone rang and
I
went to answer as Blaine began getting dinner on the table.
“Hello, Bear
Park, Big Beau speaking,” I said.
“Hey, Beau, you
wanted me to call?” Master Waddie asked.
“Yes, Master
Wolf, thanks for returning my call. Remember Dad Jake? I
spoke to you about him and my ongoing relationship at work for
years. Then I stopped it when he began to reject my Godson, his
youngest child?” I asked.
“Yes, I remember
it well and was a bit amazed as a straight man he jumped the fence for
a gay man. Remember, I told you my experience was it usually was
a strong single relationship with a gay man, but he would never venture
out to more partners. Exclusivity with one male partner or female
is more compatible with straight mentality,” he replied.
“Well, good
master, there has been a new variable. He just laid it at our
feet why he rejected his youngest son all these years,” I said.
“I remember you
told me he blamed the boy for his wife’s demise. Is there
more? No, wait, lemme' guess. His real rejection of the kid
is because he has realigned his sexuality with his son. His son
has become his wife and replaced his need for you?” he asked.
“You’re pretty
damn sharp, Master Wolf,” I replied.
“That’s why you
pay me the big bucks, slave Beau. There is, by the way, no charge
for this conversation,” he said laughing. “It’s far too interesting to
sully it with money. You should be charging me for this one,” he
said and laughed again.
“Furthermore,”
he continued, “The child has done everything he could to win his
father’s approval with little results and has gone overboard in his
attempts to please; much like a slave would wish to win approval of his
master by pleasing him. His dad relates this with his experiences
with you being a slave and has subconsciously rejected him more to
induce this performance from him, right?” he asked.
“You’re batting
a thousand so far, Master Wolf,” I replied.
“Then your
question would be...?”
“The boy is our
Godson. Our family, here in San Diego, is putting him through
college which his father refused to do for him,” I said.
“Of course he
did. He didn’t want to lose control of his little slave.
College would mean separation, knowledge, developing a more mature
self-awareness better image of himself with cognative thinking, logic,
and reason. It might mean an end to his power base. To Jake
it’s not only threatening, it’s frightening. He’s there to
reclaim his slave and re-establish control. He may even ask your
help,” he said.
“Exactly.
He’s done precisely that. My question to you is how we should
feel about this? Is this incest? Is it psychotic?
Should we be indignant and seek to protect the kid? He is our
Godson, but he's also an adult. He's twenty-one years old.
However, we don’t want to see him hurt any more,” I said strongly.
“Well, is it
incest? Absolutely. Ain't no doubt about 'tat. But,
only if sex occurs. It may be called incestuous, but it isn’t
incest until they boogie. Is it psychotic? Probably
not. Should you be indignant?” he asked and paused to laugh,
“You’ve had sex with his dad so you live in a glass house. That
would be a little like the pot calling the kettle black, and if I know
you like I think I do, because of empathy, you’ve allowed the child to
seduce you rendering you incapable of a rational judgement in this
situation. I hate to be clever, but what the hell, you’re the
shuttle cock and they’re the players,” he said.
“I don’t think I
like the analogy, but I see your point,” I said and laughed.
“Your next step
is to lay it at the kid’s feet, but not with his dad present.
Don’t even tell him if you can avoid it, while his dad is on your
turf. Send his old man back to his domain with hugs, kisses, and
promises to consider helping him, but you need more time.
Whatever it takes, get him to his home. Meanwhile, don’t alarm
the kid but manage somehow to have him sleep over at a friend's
tonight. Get him out of the house. Dad is there to cause a
confrontation which won’t be wholesome for the boy in the long
run. The kid can’t be expected to make a rational decision with
his dad offering to hand him the love he never got from him for twenty
years. Give the kid any lame fucking excuse but get him out of
the house. Got that?” Master Waddie asked.
“Yes, sir,
sounds like damn good advice to me,” I replied.
“You do that,
then you’ll have breathing room and daddy won’t have a reason for
staying
around if he can’t cause a confrontation. We can talk
again. I’m home all night tonight. I’ll be in the office
tomorrow. Call anytime and I’ll leave word with my receptionist
to put you through immediately. If you need me again tonight
call at any hour, and I’ll take your call. Good luck and do let
me know how you progress,” he said.
“I will, Master,
and thanks,” I replied.
“No problem,
good night,” he said.
I hung up the
phone and turned to Blaine who just looked at me. “He’s pretty
damn sharp,” I said quietly. Blaine nodded his head. “Said we
needed to get Little Beau out of the house for the evening or for as
long as his dad is here. To get Jake back to his place before we
talk
to Little Beau about it.”
“Smart man. Good
advice,” Blaine agreed, “Call Sarge, ask him to come get him.
They’re
fifteen minutes away. They’ll keep him as long as you need,”
Blaine said.
“Good idea,” I
said as I dialed Sarge’s number.
“Hey, Button,
how you doing, hon? This is Big Beau,” I said.
“I’m fine,
Beau. How’s my big bro?” Button asked.
“I’m fine,
sweetheart. I need to speak to your number one master for a
moment if I may,” I said.
“Sure, Beau,
he’s right here,” Button called Sarge to the phone.
“Hey, buns,
what’s up?” Sarge came on.
“Sarge, we need
your help,” I said.
“Name it!
You
got it, kid,” he replied.
“We need to get
Little Beau out of the house for a while. Maybe tonight and
perhaps tomorrow. Could you come get him?” I asked.
“Be right
there,” Sarge replied.
“Just let
yourself in, go to his room, get him, and leave as quietly as
possible,”
I said.
“Will do,
sweetheart, be there in ten,” Sarge replied.
“Thanks, Sarge,
we owe you. We’ll talk later. I’ll give you a call.”
“Sure, anytime,”
Sarge replied. He hung up.
I went to Little
Beau’s room and knocked gently. “Come in,” he said.
“Hi,
Darlin,’ I want you to do something for me.”
“Anything,
Master, you know that,” he replied.
“Peeps,I ain't a
master. You must reserve that title for Sarge, Chief, and the
Dungeon Master. I know what we shared was me being strong and
demanding of you, but it was what you needed at that moment, and I
provided it for you becasue I love you. I'll always be
there if you need it again, but I'm just a slave at heart. It's
what any good slave would do for someone in distress no matter if he
was another like himself. Just call
me Beau or brother, sweetheart.”
“Okay, Beau, I
was only trying to show my respect for you,” he said a little
embarrassed.
“I know you
were. I know you
respect me and I appreciate it, but it ain’t proper right now.
Sarge is coming by in a few minutes to get you. I want you to
stay over at his place tonight. I want you to just go quietly
with him and not bother to come in to tell us goodbye, understand?" I
asked.
“Yes, I think
so. What’s this all about, Beau?” he asked.
“Will you trust
me until tomorrow to answer your question?” I asked in reply.
“I’d trust you
forever, Beau. Sure, I’ll go with Sarge. Love to, I may
even get to ride that big piece of mad-man military meat again
tonight,” he said with a wicked grin.
“I’ll say a
prayer for you, dear,” I assured him. We both laughed. “Now don’t
come out of your room until Sarge gets here,” I gently ordered.
“I promise,
Beau,” he replied.
I hugged him. “I
love you, and I’ll call you tomorrow morning.”
“I love you,
too, Beau.”
I helped Blaine
finish getting dinner on the table. We never used the big dinning
room unless we’re entertaining the family for the holidays. We
have a table set up in an ante-room off the kitchen that used to be a
large walk in pantry. Blaine and I completely redid it to make it
into a cozy, kitchen dining area. Plenty of room for everything
including a couple of linen storage cabinets. Sarge quietly came
by and whisked Little Beau away before I went to Jake’s room and
quietly knocked. He came to the door. “Come, dad, we got
dinner on the table,” I said. He followed me down. The
Dungeon Master was already seated and stood for Jake. Chief
joined us and our next door neighbor, an older, straight man who had
come to know and love us was invited. Blaine set down and I
motioned for Dad Jake to sit next to me.
“Isn’t Little
Beau eating?” he asked.
“He went to the
movies with a friend and is going to stay over at his house
tonight. We fed him and his friend before they left. I
reminded him you were here, but he didn’t think you’d care whether he
stayed or not. I didn’t say anything, dad, ‘cause I don't
have a
clear picture yet about the details. We’ll talk after
dinner,” I said. Jake seemed satisfied with my explanation but
was visibly shaken Little Beau didn’t want to hang around for
him. What did he expect? Just because you’re the kid’s
parent? Little Beau was, after all, a legal adult as of his last
birthday. He was twenty-one. He could drink now and die for
his country. Well, he could have done that at eighteen, he just
couldn’t have voted as to whether he wanted to go to war or not.
We had a
pleasant dinner. Bob our neighbor, a retired railroad worker for
Amtrak, engaged dad in conversation. They had some things in
common coming from the same straight mentality. “Well, sir, it
was a bit of culture shock living next door to what I thought was
gonna’ be the Hell’s Angels,” Bob related to Jake laughing, “Then less
and more so when I found out they’s Hell’s Belles instead,” he
said. We all laughed at his crude take on our life style. “Then
over the years they’s done a lot of nice things for me. A hell of
a lot. Why, two of their buddies cured me of a crippling
arthritis the doctors had given up on. Be what they may,
masters/slaves, whatever they want’s to be, they be damn good people.
"Good to me
anyways, and I’m right proud to have ‘em as neighbors. Took me a
while to get used to coming by and several of ‘em walking around in the
buff. Hell, now when they invite me to their pool, I think
nothing of joining ‘em. They don’t bother me none. They
respect
me, and I respect them. You say your son is living here with
‘em? That sweet young boy they call ‘Peeps’? If he’s your
son you have one hell of a kid there Mister Jake. He goes out of
his way to be good to me and does little chores ‘round my place.
Won’t take a dime for his help. I tried to give him something for
his thoughfulness, but he won't take it. He's well mannered,
bright, and intelligent,” old Bob raved on about our Godson. Jake
just played with his food and muttered
thanks to Bob.
I knew there was
a reason we’d been good to that old man all these years. Bob was
like part of our extended family. He even called Big Jim,
‘Dungeon Master.’ He loved Chief. Told everybody he had a
real, honest to God, Indian Chief living next door to him. We had
grown to be able to kid with him and had a lot of fun together.
Every now and then he’d bring a ‘sweetie’ by he was dating, but if she
got upset he’d dump her. He finally found an outrageous woman who
traveled the world who was not the least put off by our
lifestyle. Her name was Blanche. She was a terror. A
fun terror. Everyone loved Blanche. She insisted Bob get a
bike and join the family. They eventually did and were married at
one of our family gatherings in the buff. Everyone breathed a
sigh and was so relieved when they finally decided to put their clothes
on.
After
dinner it
took a while for Blaine and me to clean up. Chief and the Dungeon
Master helped. I wanted them there for support when I talked with
Jake. I already had in mind what I was going to say. Thank
God I called Master Wolf. The man was good. He helped
defused what might have become a bad situation. We got the idea
Jake came to San Diego to pick up Little Beau, demand he give up school
and return to Los Angeles with him. Knowing Little Beau the way I
do, he just might have done it. He loved his dad that much.
He would have considered anything to gain his dad’s love. If I
was in the kid's shoes, I don't think I could say no to that old wop of
a sex machine. Jake was one of a few men in my life who grew
sexier with age. There were more than a few times after I cut him
off my gut craved to feel his big cock rooting around like a hog in a
truffle patch.
Fortunately,
Little Beau attached himself to two very powerful male figures in our
family, Sarge and the Dungeon Master. He was always in Big Jim’s
lap with his head on his chest while Big Jim read or talked to
us. He’d have his arms around Little Beau holding him. The
kid soaked it up. I know how he felt. I got my fair share
of the giant’s love with my head on his huge chest. He’s my rock
to this day. Don’t care how bad things got, ten minutes in that
man’s arms and the world looks a lot brighter.Little Beau was
the same with Sarge. Titus and Button were giving enough to let
Little Beau have some of their beloved Sarge’s time and love.
Besides, they had each other, too. By this time, Titus pretty
much took over being Button’s exclusive master. He reported to
Titus first and Sarge second, with Sarge’s approval of
course. I knew in my heart Little Beau was going to end up a good
master’s slave. He wanted that more than anything.
A good, strong,
firm, but loving master would be the perfect replacement for a father
who was cold and rejecting. Peeps was wise enough to not kid
himself about belonging to Sarge. Sarge became a ‘safe’ harbor
for Little Beau. He knew he could give and receive all the love
he needed from Sarge and he didn’t have to worry about the
complications of a real master/slave relationship. Don’t
misunderstand. He accepted Sarge as his master and knew because
Sarge was his first master he would always think of him way. A
part of him would always belong to Sarge and a part of Sarge whould
aways belong to Peeps.
Little Beau
showed Sarge the respect he was due and paid homage to Sarge’s boots
like any good slave should. He knew in his heart, as we all did,
when it came time for Little Beau to go to his own master, Sarge would
send him with the greatest love in his heart; however, you could count
on Sarge to check out the intended master to the max. As much as
I ragged on old Sarge, and he and I went round and round, he was the
perfect first master for Little Beau. I will always be grateful
to Sarge for that bit of kindness.
What the hell,
that dirty old man was getting a young hot piece of ass
regularly. All he had to do was lower his pants, snap his fingers
for Little Beau, and the kid was on his dick. Nevertheless, we
were grateful for the chemistry between the two. Sarge treated
him like a son and Little Beau needed that. When he did well in
school, Sarge was the first he’d run to for approval. No one in
the family made a bigger fuss over Little Beau’s accomplishments or
sang his praises more than Sarge.
We moved from
the kitchen into the living room. Bob excused himself, thanked us
for dinner and left. We were alone with Jake. “I talked
with Master Wolf on the phone before dinner, Dad, and he helped clear a
couple of things in my mind. What I think we’d like to know is do
you want to interrupt Little Beau’s schooling?” I asked.
“If necessary,
yes,” he said without hesitation. There was a stunned silence,
and I felt everyone in the room physically pull back from him.
I tried not to,
but in a quiet, resolute voice I sais, “I won’t let that happen, dad,”
Jake knew I held the trump card.
“I won’t let it
happen, either,” added my master firmly.
Chief raised his
hand. “Me either, Jake, that kid’s been hurt enough,” Chief said as
fact.
“If I have any
say in it at all, it won’t happen, Jake,” Blaine said with conviction.
“He’s my
son. He belongs at home with his dad not with you...”
“Perverts,
dad?"
I asked. He hung his head knowing I won that round.
“And I suppose
what you have in mind is not just a tad on the questionable side?
You want what you and I had, only now, you want it with Little Beau,
your own son. Just because he’s your son doesn’t white wash the
stigma of perversion,” I said.
“That’s not what
I meant and you know it,” he said.
“No, you’re
wrong. I don’t know that anymore. I did once and would have
sworn by your love; however, I ain't sure who you are today. I’m
calling in all the debts you owe me right now, dad, right this very
minute, for the sake of your son. You know I don’t want money,
but I do demand control in this situation. You gave up control
when you started pulling away from Little Beau when he began junior
high school. Every man in this room watched it happen,” I said.
“Amen to that,”
said the Dungeon Master.
“Who was it who
emotionally supported that poor kid all those years? Who was it
taught him to play ball? It wasn’t you, Jake. Who was it
took him to baseball practice and football practice. We were
there, at every fucking game to cheer
him on? It wasn’t his dad. Fuck, Jake, we had to rope and
hog tie you to get you to his Goddamn graduation. I should have
just turned my back and let Chief scalp you. I was so
disappointed and pissed at you I would have held you down while he done
the deed,” I said with considerable anger.
“Amen to that,
too, Jake,” Chief agreed who just about heard enough.
“I came to ask
your help not to get lectured to. I thought you’d understand. You
guys of all people,” he accused.
“You’re wrong,
Jake. Your problem is, we understand all too well, and you’re
asking us to consider your selfish needs, not Little Beau’s.
That’s
exactly what you’ve done to him for years. You ain’t shown that
kid any love at all because of your misplaced grief and sexual
confusion. Now, you sit there and tell me that’s not
selfish? Now he’s becoming an adult, you want to demand he come
home to become
your little slave, but what kind of a master do you think you’d make,
Jake? You haven’t done a damn thing to deserve him. You
didn’t want him to go to college because, you wanted to keep him under
your thumb just like a little slave boy. He was your brightest
child. Your crowning achievement as a father, for Christ
sake. I would give both nuts and dick to have sired a kid like
him,” I said.
“Every man, with
or without a dick, in this room is in agreement with that, Jake,” the
Dungeon Master said, “Hell, every one of us has become more of a father
to Peeps than you ever were. I ain’t said very much but I’m
backing my slave a hundred and ten percent, Jake. I won’t let you
do it either without some decent soul searching on your part.
Besides that, Little Beau is an adult now, and I won’t let it happen
unless I hear it from his mouth he wants it,” Big Jim said to Jake in a
voice that nailed his butt to the door. Surprised the hell out of
me, but that was my giant.
“Don’t look at
me or Blaine, Jake, you know we feel the same damn way,”Chief added
sternly.
“Look, Dad, I’ll
give you this...I won’t say no, I won’t help you. There will be
stipulations. I want to discuss it with Little Beau away from
you. I’m going to see he stays away until after you return to
L.A. He’s twenty-one now!” I exclaimed. Jake looked
shocked. He didn’t even remember how old his own son was.
“You don’t have
legal control over him anymore. You also don’t have emotional
control over him anymore. We do. Call us any name you want,
but thank God, he has seen fit to give us that option right now.
One stipulation will be he finishes college living here with us.
Second, it will be his decision as to how much he wants to see you
depending on the outcome of our presenting this news to him. If
he’s totally turned off by the idea, I ain't gonna’ lie to you, I’ll
see to it he’s protected,” I said.
“We all will,
Jake," added Blaine.
Jake hung his
head and started to cry. Not one man moved to console him
including
me. He needed to feel our solidarity. To console him would
have shown a weakness in the ranks. “Look, dad, you know me well
enough to know I won’t try to influence his choice. I’ll present
the facts and options and that’s that. You better do some
praying, and a good deal of major soul searching might be
advised. We’ll talk tomorrow before you go back. It won’t
look so bad in the morning, I promise,” I said. Jake got himself
together and nodded his head.
I walked him
back to his room. It was late and I retired to the Bear’s
Lair with my master. He held me and kissed me. “I was
s'damned proud of you, Beaver, I just wish Earl, Jeb, and Beryl could
have been here to hear what you told him,” he said.
“What makes you
think they weren’t?” I asked smiling. “You think either of them old men
or Master Earl would’ve missed something that good with their baby
slave holding court?” I asked with a grin.
We both laughed
and then the Dungeon Master, my love, again surprised the hell out of
me. “Go to him, Beau. Give yourself to him,” he said.
I looked at him
stunned. “Please, Master, don’t feel you have to...” I started.
“That ain't a
request, slave, it’s an order. You will obey your master.
You must trust the man what own's your ass, slave,” he demanded and
kissed me gently, “And, no holding back from him, either, you
understand, slave?" he asked. "You give him the best you have to
offer,” my master said firmly. I knew better than to
question him further.
“I will obey,
Master, and thank you, sir, for this lesson,” I kissed him again
and added, “You’re a much bigger and better man than I am, Master,” I
said softly.
“You know that
ain’t true, you little shit, now go,” he commanded, turned me around,
and patted me on the butt. “Don’t stay the night. You sleep in
your master’s arms, not his. Just pleasure him, see to his
comfort, give him your love, and return to your master. I’ll be
waiting. You may even get a second load up there tonight,” he
growled. God, I loved that man.
I went to Dad
Jake’s room and knocked gently. Jake came to he door in his
underwear. “May I come in, dad?”
“Sure, Son, come
on in,” he opened the door for me.
“My Master sent
me to you for your pleasure and comfort, sir. I have been ordered
to offer myself to you to use in anyway you see fit. Furthermore,
I am in agreement with my master’s order and wish to please you,
sir. Perhaps, if I hadn’t withdrawn from you eight years ago we
wouldn’t be in this position. I still love you, dad. You
loved me all those years ago and know you still do. I can’t turn
love on
and off any more than you can. Give me your love, dad, and I’ll
give you mine in return,” I offered.
Jake grabbed me
and held me tight. I held him equally as tight. He sobbed
in my arms and thanked me and my master for allowing me to come to
him. I forgot how good Dad Jake felt in my arms. I recalled
the love we had for each other all those years and the wonderful
outrageous sex we shared time after time. I started getting hard.He
laughed. “Your old man can still do it to you, huh, kid?” he
asked.
“You know it,
you old frump. I love you so much, Jake. There has to be a
happy ending to this. We just have to find it together,” I
replied.
“Let’s worry
about that later, slave, you don’t know how bad I need your ass.
I may come on entry,” he groaned. I slathered him up real good
with my spit. He mounted me from the top with my legs on his
broad shoulders and slammed that huge Italian cock as deep as he could
into my gut. He heaved twice, sucked in air, and I could feel him
filling me with his gizz. It happened just the way he thought it
might.
“That was just a
warm up, dad. Relax inside me for a minute, and we’ll do some
good-old down home fucking like you like to do. You need to
ride your slave-boy for a while,” I said.
He couldn’t get
enough. I didn’t think he was ever going to stop fucking me.
Finally he started climbing the hill, and I knew he was going get
it. I asked him permission to come and he said ‘no,’ save it for
my master. I didn’t come but he emptied a second big load up my
butt. Jake still had it. 'It'--- that undefinable sexual
stimulant to my psyche. I could have come in a second, but I
learned over the years not to if ordered by the master fucking
me. It was a matter of control and my need to become a good
slave. Master Jeb was right all along. I was harder on
myself than any master’s punishment could have been. I saw it as
my
master’s right to control my coming.
Master Earl
rarely let me come in all those years, but when he did, oh my
God, it was like Christmas, New Years, Thanksgiving, my birthday,
the forth of July, Valentine’s Day, Bastille Day, and ground hogs day
all rolled into one. He promised he would have me learn to
control my ejaculations and he did. It got easier as time went
on. I still could come at a moments notice. Before he was
killed he was working on having me come by snapping his fingers and
ordering me to. He had me perform several times for select family
members to show off his slave. I was able to obey almost every
time. Our family members were impressed.
He’d have me
stand at parade rest, take hold of my nose chain, pull it tight, snap
his fingers and order me to come. He would pull harder on my nose
ring, but I knew not to follow. He wanted me to feel the
pressure. Sometimes he would reach behind me and press hard on my plug
as I pushed back. Pretty soon I couldn’t hold it any more and
would shout, “By your command, Master!” I would shout and shoot
four or
five feet in the air. Now my giant is following that same
training and limits my coming. So I wasn’t real sure I’d get to
come that evening. As it turned out I didn’t. He thought I
needed to learn a lesson from the evening and coming would be a
reward. My mater's use of his slave was enough reward for
me.
The next
morning, Jake was a different man. Everyone, including me, was
shocked by his abrupt change of spirit. He was radiant. He
talked little about the night’s conversation, but when he did it was
with humility and acceptance. He knew Little Beau was in the best
of hands and we would do what was right for him. We assured him
we would as we waved goodbye to him.
“Well,
Beaver...” the Dungeon Master said about to go on with his sentence,
but I cut him off.
“Please, Master,
don’t say it, I’ll say it for you...my Master knows best.
Damn. I’m so sorry, Master, I even questioned you. I feel
so
bad.”
“No problem,
you’ll be punished later,” he grinned wickedly.
“You promise?” I
asked seriously.
“Of course,” he
replied. He couldn’t contain himself any longer and we both broke
up in each other’s arms; glad a crisis was averted.
“You know what
this means don’t you, slave?” the Dungeon Master asked.
“I have an idea,
but I’d rather hear it from my master,” I replied.
“You’re gonna’
have to start making bi-monthly trips to Los Angeles to pleasure him to
protect our Godson. Whatever it takes, with my blessing, none of
us want to see that kid hurt more than he already has been. Maybe
Jake’ll find someone else while you’re keeping his beast at bay,” he
said. My master grew into a wise and considerate man, and
excellent Dungeon Master and a superb master. I was only too
proud to serve him. Fuck. Did he punish me good.
Woah. My ass ached for three days. I couldn’t stop smiling.
Sarge kept
Little Beau that night as well and returned him the next morning.
Sarge and Peeps were like two young lovers, whispering and giggling
with
each other. It was good to see. It was sickening.
That wretched old pervert. Sarge was one of a kind. Still
wish there were fifty more in the world just like him. When he
passed away we thought we were going have to get a casket for Little
Beau as well. It was like it was his real dad lying there.
In some ways, it was. That young man went through the seventh
ring of hell after Sarge died. Since I’d been through the fire,
run from the rain, and see the light, I knew what to do. I got
him up and out before he had a chance to wallow in a quagmire of
self-pity, doubt, and depression. I taught him how to
grieve. We worked at it. Yes, it’s work. Grief
work. He didn’t grieve alone, I grieved with him. We all
did. Sarge left a hole in our family we couldn’t find a plug
large enough to fill. It was so like Sarge. We irreverently
compared the large hole in our hearts to another hole what no man ever
seemed to be able to completely fill— his.
After Sarge
brought Little Beau back, we set down and talked with him. We
asked Sarge to join us because we knew we were going to need him.
He and Little Beau bonded pretty tight over the last two years and
Little Beau acknowledged Sarge as his master. I carefully
explained to them my phone call to Master Wolf, his recommendations,
and why we had to get Little Beau out of the house. Sarge
immediately took our view and said it was the best thing we could have
done under the circumstances. I gave all credit to Master Wolf.“Wise man,” said
Sarge. We all agreed. Little Beau was stunned. He sat
quietly with Sarge’s big arm around him. He didn’t know what to
say or think.
“If you want to
stay with Sarge a while longer we have no problem with it, Son,” I told
him. “Maybe, it’s better you talk it out with him first.”
“No, Beau, Sarge
knows I love and respect him, but I also know, without asking, he’d
want me to talk this out with my Godfathers and then with my
master. Am I right, Master?” he looked at Sarge for approval.
“You know you’re
right, my sweet baby-slave, you didn’t even have to ask. You need
to talk to your immediate family first and then your old master’s arms
will be waiting for you to listen,” Sarge said. Little Beau
started crying and told Sarge he loved him, hugged, and kissed
him. That’s just what the kid needed was support from those who
loved him most. We did, and for all my ragging about Sarge, I
knew in my heart he loved Little Beau without measure.
Days went by and
Little Beau wouldn’t talk to me. The summer was coming to an end, and I
suggested we get away together for a weekend. We planned a ride
out to the desert to Master Zack’s and Will’s. He thought that
sounded good. He was in good spirits and didn’t seem preoccupied
with the news. His other Godfathers accompanied us of
course. We took my bike, and he rode buddy with me. He
loved the big bikes like I did when I rode behind my master and my
giant.He loved wearing
his leathers we bought him, and he loved to see me in mine. He
thought I was the epitome of a biker dude (as he called me) with my
tattoos and body jewelry. He asked me to ride by the side of the
Dungeon Master and just a bit behind so he could look at his big boots
as he rode his bike. Like Godfather, like Godson. Peeps was
going to be as big a boot slave as I was. We’d laugh and giggle
when we saw some man with a really hot pair of boots and whispered to
each other what we’d do to him if we could.
Master Zack,
Will, and Josh were glad to have us visit and we had a wonderful
weekend. Peeps slept between the Dungeon Master and I but he
still wouldn’t open up to us. I discussed it with Master Zack and
Josh while Little Beau and Will were playing in the pool. Josh
asked if he could try something. I said sure. I watched
Josh pull rabbits out of hats what shouldn’t have rabbits in them to
begin with.
Later we were in
the big spa together after a wonderful dinner Will and his kitchen
helpers cooked. Josh motioned for Little Beau to sit in his
lap. Little Beau moved slowly and made himself comfortable just
in front of Josh. Master Josh enfolded him with his big
arms. Peeps admired and respected Josh greatly. He set in
Josh’s lap and the five of us continued our conversation about nothing
in particular. Time passed and I looked over at Little Beau and
saw big tears rolling down his cheeks like salt water boulders.
He wasn’t actually crying, they were just coming from somewhere deep
within. Then I knew, Josh was healing something or at least
breaking the log-jam for the flow to start.
Josh wouldn’t let him go
even though he asked to be excused.“No, little one,
you need to sit right here for a while longer. That’s a loving
order from this master, Son. I'll let you go when you're full,”
he said quietly. He held him tight for about another half an
hour. Then the dam broke big-time. Josh let him go and
Little Beau headed straight for my arms. It all came pouring out;
years of pain, rejection, frustration, anger, hurt, disappointment, and
everything else one could think of. I held him while he cried
heart out. Zack, Will, Big Jim, Chief, Blaine, and Josh gathered
close to put their hands on him for support and comfort. It
helped.Little Beau kept
saying over and over, “How could he? How could he?” he asked.
“There, there,
Baby Beau, the worst part’s over. Healing can begin, thanks to
Master Josh. There, there, shhuu...it’s gonna’ be fine.
Your Godfathers ain’t gonna’ let nothing happen you ain’t
comfortable with. Master Zack, can Little Beau and I go sit on
your rock and watch the Sun go down? I think we need to be alone
for a while.”
“Sure, you know
where it is. Nice place to be alone. See you guys later,”
he said.
I pulled on my
leather pants, boots, and vest. I made him pull his on too,
because I knew the minute the Sun went down it would start getting
chilly. I led him by his hand up the carved out steps up the side
of the huge boulder to the natural ledge and set him on the bench Zack
and Button built many summers ago. I leaned him up against me and
put my arms around him to hold him. “You have to talk wiht me,
Peeps. You have to tell me what you’re thinking. You have
to get it out,” I said.
“I’ve been so
afraid to tell you how I feel, Beau,” he lamented.
“Why,
sweetheart? There’s nothing you could tell me what’s gonna’ make
me love you any less,” I assured him.
“I should listen
to my master. Sarge told me the same thing. You sure?” he
asked cautiously.
“You have my
word,” I replied.
“I want him,
Beau. I want my Jake for my master. I’ve always wanted him
as long as I can remember. When I reached purbity, the very first
time I jacked off I fantasized about him fucking me or me sucking
him off, night after night. My bedroom closet’s back wall is the
wall to our bathroom at home. I drilled a tiny hole through the
wall so I could look through at him in the raw. I used to sit
there watching him jack off on the toilet and get mine the same time he
did. I used to dream of taking his come and swallowing it.
One time he came in a rag and threw it in the dirty clothes
hamper. When no one was looking, I took it to my room and
sucked his come out of it. It tasted wonderful, Beau.
"I don’t care
how he wants to love me Beau, if that’s the only way I can have my
dad’s love, so be it. I need him Beau. I never had his
love. Can you imagine me being his slave and taking care of all
his needs. Having sex with my dad is the greatest thing I could
think of happening to me. I never thought in a million years it
might happen. Then this last week I began to think it just
might. I have to see him on my own though. I have to be
with him. I have to see if what he’s telling you is true. I
don’t fully believe it, yet. Until he takes me in his arms and
kisses me, I won’t believe it. I didn’t want to say anything
before now because I thought you might get upset and think I’m really
sick.”
“Beau?” I asked
him, “How could I be upset with you when I’m as guilty in my feelings
for you as your dad? I’m your Godfather for Christ sake and I’ve
been making love to you. How much different can it be?
Besides, don't you think I know the attraction Jake has. Your old
man is one fuck'n hot son of a bitch. Ain't no two ways about it,
Son. My master sent me to him the night he came to visit to
pleasure him and he fucked the holy snot out of me, twice!” I exclaimed
and rolled my eyes. Little Beau giggled.
“Was he good,
Beau?” Peeps asked.
“Dearheart...your
old
man still has it. It was our first time together in over
eight
years. That old hardheaded wop can still send this old slave into
outer space without a booster rocket,” I declared. We laughed
together. "But the old sum' bitch would let me shoot my load and then
to teach me a lesson neither would my master when he fucked me later,"
I moaned. I had Peeps in histerics.
“Yeah, Sarge is
training me to only come when he gives me permission. He punishes
me with his whip when I have an accident and shoot without my master's
permission. I never told him I got the control part down pretty
good, I come just so's I can have both," he giggled and I agreed
with him, "I'm like
you, Beau, I need control. Then you understand why I might
want him?” Peeps asked.
“Oh, God,
yes. I’d be lying if I said no, but is that what you really
want, Peeps?" I asked. "There's lots of other good masters out there
you could
find who wouldn't have the hang-ups Jake might have," I said.
“What harm could
it do to try my old man? I never got much affection from him and
to pleasure him might be just what the both of us needs. I can’t
help love him, Beau, he’s my dad for gosh sakes, but to put your mind
at rest, I won’t become his slave without his full measure of
love. If I see it’s going to be the same old thing, I’ll never
fully commit to him. I’m an adult now. My Godfathers have
taught me I have a choice,” he replied.
“Yes, you do
have a choice. You're absolutely right, but I’m not going to let
the two of you jump into this. You have two other Godfathers to
convince as well and they won’t be as easy or understanding as I
am. You and I are looking at Jake from a slave's point of view,
your other Godfathers will look at it as masters and their need to
protect you. You have other people to think about. What
about
Sarge? You just gonna’ dump him because your dad snaps his
fingers and wants you for his slave boy? I don’t think
so. First of all, I think you love that dirty old man too much to
do that to him; secondly, I won’t let you do it to a man I cherish,
who has been more than good to you. Sarge loves you very
much. Then what about school? With two strong willed
masters and one brother slave to back me, I won’t allow you go
with
your dad until after you graduate and graduate from Vet school.
That may
be four or five more years. I’ll allow him to visit, date you,
stay the night or a weekend, but no permanent living
arrangements. After that, if the two of you still want to be
master and slave then Jake pays for you to go through three months
training like all the other slaves.
"Hey, who am I
kidding, here? You’re twenty-one years old. I can’t really
tell you what to do, but if you’re living with us, I expect you to
listen to your Godfathers and abide by our wishes. Your
Godfathers love you too much to hang school over your head and say,
'Well, you have to do this or no school.' We’d never do that to
you. Even if you go against our wishes, we’ll still see you
through school. We love you and that’s why we’re concerned.
Furthermore, I want him to come down to San Diego to live with
you. If he wants you bad enough he’ll do it. Start out
together on a new turf. Don’t go back into his world. That
old house has nothing but bad memories and ghost in it. Insist he
begin to think of you as his slave and not as his son. Stop
referring
to him as dad and call him Master Jake. You both must start to
set aside the fact he’s your parent. He must realize you’re an
adult and doing this because it’s your choice and not his due as your
dad. Do you understand what I’m saying?” I asked.
“I understand
completely, Beau. You’re trying to look out for me and my
happiness, and I love you for that. All you guys. You guys
watch over me like mother hens, and I want you to know, I appreciate
it...always have. Other than my brothers and sisters my
Godfathers are the only source of real love I’ve had in my life.
That’s why I didn’t want to disappoint you by telling you this; how I
really felt about my dad wanting him to make love to me. I would
lay in his arms in a minute. Do you realize he's never held me in
his arms in my life, Beau; never even put his arms around me. Do
you know what that would mean to me to have him do that?” he asked.
“I think I can,
little one,” I said quietly. He started crying.
“He’s never told
me he loved me, Beau,” Peeps said sadly. Then the flood gates
opened again.
God, what
parents won’t do to their children. Look what mine did to
me. They made a family slave out of me at an early age and then
just came to expect it of me as time went on. There is no such
thing and do-overs. Who among us suffered miserable childhoods
and wouldn't love to go back and restructure those years as we felt
they should have been. We can't. It’s as simple as
that. We have to make the best of what was thrown on our
plate. Some folks spend their lives not living but trying to get
over their childhood. Some never do. How is it, in
comparison to the number of years we spend on this planet less than
twenty of those years can have so much influence on us?
Little Bill---
Bull and Charlie's boy--- had a great childhood compared to Peeps or
me. Give me Bull and Charlie as parents any fucking day of the
week compared to what Jake did to Little Beau. He really doesn’t
deserve the kid but Peeps is head over heals in love with his own
dad. What can any of us say to him: no, this isn’t right?
Little Beau is an adult. He can damn well do what he wants.
The most I can do is try to impose restrictions to soften the worlds
colliding. If Jake goes along with our concerns and plans for
Little Beau without being ‘Bull of the Woods’ demanding, then let them
do it. Incest? Maybe, but it’s not very likely they’re
going to give birth to an idiot child.
We sat on the
bench and watched the Sun go down and the stars come out as I held him
in my arms. I felt his anticipation. He finally just gave
up on his dad and decided, as so many gay men do, to find a
substitute. Now, he had the doors to a new world opened to him
and he was eager to cross the threshold. In a sense, having a
master is the same as having a strong parental figure in your
life. Structured a little differently perhaps, but the roles and
results are pretty similar. Some need it more than others.
Some only fantasize they need it, but won’t give themselves over to the
reality. They just can’t get over their rebellious teenager
syndrome. If they only knew, it was the key to passing into a
mature, comfortable, giving, sharing, humanistic adulthood. We
talked some more and I pointed out to Little Beau he already adequately
replaced his dad with Sarge who went out of his way to show him love
and appreciation.
I knew I might
as well be whistling ‘Dixie’ in a hurricane. He had to try his
dad. He was like a moth to a flame. I felt it. I knew
it. Who was I to hold him back from the candy dish. Hell, I
had it pulled away from me too many times in life to count, and it
hurts every time. I told him how satisfied his dad seemed after
my master sent me to him and how appreciative and docile he was the
next morning. I told him about my master's suggestion I go to Los
Angeles twice a month to run interference for him (Little Beau) until
he can sort out the mess or until he gets through school. That’s
what his family in San Diego was most concerned about. He’s doing
so well in school. He’s happy with us and Sarge. Why rock
the boat. He has the rest of his life to explore that avenue with
his dad.
I did get an
agreement out of him. He would tell his dad his Godfathers were
now his accepted parental figures. He was living under their
roof, being supported by them, and he felt obligated to abide by their
wishes. He agreed he would tell him the truth about Sarge.
That he found a man he felt comfortable calling master who gave him a
great deal of unconditional love and was training him to be a good
slave. He promised to tell his dad Sarge was supportive and
caring and he felt he had obligations to him. Little Beau would
make it quite clear he had no intention of dumping Sarge.
When we returned to San Diego there was a night letter delivered
Saturday evening. It was from Master Wolf:
Dear
Beau's
(Big
& Little),
I've
taken
the
liberty of dictating some thoughts to my secretary in the form of
letter concerning father/son homosexual dalliances. (Fancy name for
'gettin' it on.') I’ve had several cases in my experience, and they are
not as rare as one might think. Sometime they occur by
accident. I had a man in his early forties come to me all
upset. He met a young kid of legal age and they fell very much in
love. They had been living and cohabiting ( i.e. fucking like
snakes)
together for several years. Out of the blue he got a letter from
his ex-wife who left him shortly after his son was born for no reason
he could ascertain. He immediately filed for divorce and it was
granted on grounds of desertion. She
disappeared with the boy, remarried, and he never saw or heard a word
from her about the child in all these years. He was
stunned. She traced him though a mutual friend of their families
and sent him a letter through the friend. She was asking his help
because the kid ran away from her world and she hadn't heard anything
from or about him in three years. Could he help? She
enclosed a picture.
Well,
guess
who
the picture was of? You guessed it. His little slave.
What are the chances? The fickle finger of fate? He came to
me because he loved the kid as a mature older man loving a younger
learning man. It was sort of a daddy/boy master/slave kinky
leather relationship. The kid was eighteen when they met and was
now almost twenty-two. While the father felt guilty he also
didn't want to give up the relationship. Should he be honest with
his son or should he destroy the letter and picture and just keep quiet
about it? How would you advise the father if you were his
therapist?
I
told him
absolutely share the letter and the picture with his son. Do it
in a wholesome manner. Preface showing him these things with a
talk about what he is about to discuss with him in no way alters his
feelings toward the boy. He still will be his lover, master
and/or big baddy (whatever), and it will probably be even better
because of the news. Tell the kid he’s not upset and still loves
him very much, probably more now than ever. Not to let this
destroy something wonderful they shared together for almost four years.
He
did
exactly
as I told him and while the kid was visibly shaken he immediately
accepted the fact his father had indeed become his lover and master and
he didn't choose to give that up either. Since his wife had been
such an asshole all those years to keep them apart they decided the
father would write her a nice cordial letter telling her he checked all
areas he knew to check and he found nothing. The kid, for
whatever reason, never wanted to have anything to do with her
again. They are still together after eight years and very happy.
While
incest
occurs
far more frequently than anyone would like to admit there are
more tolerable forms of it than others. For example, father/son
homosexual bondings are tolerated better than father/daughter or
brother/sister. Father/son relationships of this nature occurs
ten times more frequently among Brits than American. Why?
We don't know. Perhaps, they've got tighter bums? Who
knows? Also, I would suspect, (not founded in fact) that the
number of cases of father/son relationships are higher than any one has
ever suspected, but because of their clandestine nature are rarely
reported. Hope this information is helpful. Sincerely,
Master Wolf
Little Beau
entered his Junior year at U.C.S.D. and was involved with school, our
household, and Sarge. I began bimonthly trips to see Jake and we
fucked like two alley cats in heat. He was always so happy to see
me and sad to see me go; however, he knew I’d be back in another two
weeks so he was satisfied for a while. I talked with him about
selling the big house and moving to a smaller one in San Diego.
He said he’d think about it.
Master Wolf
suggested they begin to date if Jake was interested. He
was. He would drive down, stay with us, and date his son.
We
didn’t care if they went out and got a motel room, but they couldn’t do
it at our place. That was Master Wolf’s suggestion as well.
Things went well until Sarge got sick and passed away that summer
Little Beau finished his junior year. Sarge made him promise on
his death bed he would finish school that next year and he did.
He grieved all that summer and into the school year. He didn’t
want to see Jake for a while. I was still traveling up to Los
Angeles twice a month. I started going by Amtrak and Jake would
pick me up at the local station. I explained why Peeps couldn’t
see him for a while. He seemed to understand. He remembered
what I went through when my master was killed.
Little Beau went
through vet school and slowly began to transfer his love for Sarge to
his dad. Jake bought a small place not far from us and began to
see more of Peeps. His attitude completely changed. He paid
for the last year of Little Beau’s college and vet school. They
began to have sex regularly even though Peeps continued to live with us
through vet school. That was one graduation we didn’t have to
drag Jake to. He was there with us and about twenty-five
surviving family members, yelling, and screaming. Jake let loose
the flood gates of love for Little Beau and that was exactly what the
kid needed. It was what Jake needed, too.
Little Beau
became a successful veterinarian in a small suburb of San Diego.
After going through three months of slave training with the Dungeon
Master and Chief, Jake made a claim for him, paid for Little
Beau’s slave training and rewarded the two trainers
handsomely. Jake has made a better master than any of us thought
he might. Peeps and his dad have been living happily together for
about five years now. Jake bought a big Harley and they come to
the limited family functions we have. They’re at our house for
dinner, weekends for pool, or we’re at their place. Sometimes we
go on a run somewhere together. We have a lot of fun with Jake
and
Peeps. Little Beau seems to have found his bliss and why
not? His old man showers the kid with more love than you can
imagine; however, Peeps waits on him hand and foot. He loves his
master. He has become his total slave. His master loves his
little slave.
It’s worked out
better than anyone expected. Wouldn’t you know, that horny
old goat, Jake, still wants to diddle me every now and then. My
Master orders me to do it so I can’t say ‘no.’ Besides, he still
can throw the meanest damn fuck into me any man ever has.
That’s where our
family is today. The story of Little Beau Peep may upset
some. It was a little disconcerting to us at first, but what the
hell, isn’t love by any definition still love? All of life is
living, loving, giving, accepting, and loss. Our family has done
its fair share of all those things but we remain together. Not as
many as in the golden years but in some ways a more quality group of
men you can count on to be there when you need them. I love them
all.