© Copyright britslut 2008. No re-use allowed without permission.
[alex and bob, two youths, are sitting on the steps of the town square, watching the world, and specifically its females, go by.]
alex: Cor, look at the tits on that!
bob: Like bloody basketballs, they are.
alex: Wouldnít mind a feel of them.
bob: Nah, probably sag down to her ankles when she takes her bra off.
alex: Yeah. Thatís the trouble with older women.
bob: How the fuck do you know? Never even shagged a girl your own age.
alex: Iím working on it. Anyway, Mr Experience, you havenít popped your cherry yet, have you?
bob: Iím saving myself for Sylvia.
alex: What, Sylvia in the lower sixth? Youíll be lucky. Get to the back of the queue.
bob: Sheís a cracker though, isnít she? Legs that go all the way up, tits to die for.
alex: Bit chubby round the waist.
bob: Those are love handles, mate. Something to hold on to while youíre giving her one. Canít stand bony girls.
alex: What about that one? [points]
bob: Her? Thatís Edís sister. Sheís not bony, just slim. Knows how to strut her stuff, doesnít she?
alex: Not half. Look at that arse. Like two ferrets fighting in a sack.
bob: Whereíd you get that from?
alex: My uncle says it. Annoys my mum every time.
bob: Talking of ferrets, what about her? [points]
alex: Thatís Daveís mum. You have got a thing about older women, havenít you?
bob: Yeah, but! Sheís a MILF and no mistake.
alex: Whatís a MILF?
bob: Mom I Like to Fuck. Thereís websites full of Ďem. Hot women getting fucked by young blokes, like us.
alex: In your dreams! Anyway, theyíll be all wrinkly with saggy tits and things.
bob: She doesnít look like sheís got saggy tits. Look, you can see her nipples sticking out! Wow, she must be feeling horny.
alex: Or cold. My mumís nips stick out sometimes. I donít think sheís horny.
bob: Wonder what her minge is like.
alex: Youíre sick.
bob: Iíd give her one, sick or not.
alex: Be like fucking your own mum.
[Silence. They are joined by chris]
alex & bob: Hi.
chris: Anything doing?
alex: Weíre just looking. Bobís got the hots for Daveís mum, over there.
chris: Wow, Gina. Yeah, sheís a babe, isnít she?
alex: How díyou know her name?
chris: I keep my ears open. Sheís hot stuff, youíre right.
alex: God, you two. She must be 45 if sheís a day.
chris: So whatís wrong with that?
bob: Yeah, a shagís a shag. Think of the years of experience in there. Done it all. She must have had loads of blokes.
chris: So they say.
chris: Thatís the word. Sheís up for it. Might try her myself.
bob: Who says?
chris: Oh, lots. Paul saw her snatch the other day. She was sitting on the grass, short skirt. He swears he saw everything.
alex: And? What was it like?
chris: He reckons she shaves. Couldnít see any hair.
bob: Fucking hell.
chris: I was round there a while back, she was in the garden, in a bikini. Not a big one either. Got a fucking hot bod, I tell you. Gave me a right boner.
alex: Has anyone ... actually done it with her?
chris: I heard that Ed gave her one.
bob: What, Ed from Stretford Road?
alex: What was it like?
chris: Dunno. Ask him yourself. Here he comes.
[They are joined by ed]
chris: Weíre talking about Gina. They say you bonked her.
ed: Hi guys. Who, Gina, Daveís mum?
bob: The same. She was here a minute ago, looking extremely sexy, for someone who Al thinks is ready for a bus pass.
ed: Yeah, sheís a hot little tart.
alex: So you did do it with her?
ed: Might have done.
bob: Are you going to tell us about it?
ed: Oh, itís personal. I never tell.
bob: I donít believe you did it.
alex: Yeah, prove it.
ed: How can I prove it? Ask her if you donít believe me.
alex: Oh yeah, like Iím going to go up to her and say, Hi, Mrs, did Ed shag you? What was he like?
ed: She might tell you. Sheís doesnít make a secret of her sex life.
chris: Whatís it worth? Free beer tonight?
ed: Hmm. OK. I popped round one Saturday afternoon, I knew Dave was out playing football. Gina was in, pleased to see me, well what woman wouldnít be? I told her how attractive she looked, said she was a really sexy woman, put my arms round her and gave her a big snog. She didnít even struggle. In fact she started rubbing my cock and unzipping me. Then she knelt down and gave me a blow-job - nearly blew it there and then. So we got naked and did it on the floor. She was quite wild, made more noise than anyone I know. We did it three times, she couldnít get enough of me. Donít blame her, mind.
alex: Wow! Whatís her minge like?
bob: Yeah, is she shaved?
ed: Completely. Bare as a baby. You can see everything.
[alex and bob moan softly.]
chris: You going to do it again?
ed: Might do. Afterwards she gave me a kiss and said pop round any time.
bob: What a slag. Christ, hereís Dave. What do we say?
[dave joins them.]
dave: Hi guys.
alex, bob, chris and ed: Hi.
[A brief silence]
alex: Dave, your mum. Um. Does she shave her pussy?
dave: Yeah, why?
alex: Youíve seen it?
dave: Course Iíve seen it. She often goes around starkers.
alex: Christ, Iíve never seen my mum naked. Not sure Iíd want to.
dave: Sheís cool. Says she doesnít believe in secrets.
bob: Hehe. No secrets at all?
dave: Donít think so.
bob: So, she tell you about Ed?
dave: Oh, yeah. Sounds like you gave her a good one.
ed: You knew?
dave: Yeah, course I did. She told me all about it. A word of advice for next time: give her puss a good licking. She loves that. Likes to cum a lot.
chris: Christ, Iím getting a hard-on here.
alex: Me too. Donít you ... I mean, with your mum walking around naked and telling you all about being shagged and all ... doesnít it give you a boner?
dave: Yeah, every time!
bob: Fucking hell! Why donít you tell her?
dave: She knows.
bob: Sheís just winding you up! Donít you ever, like, want to give her a good hard shag?
alex: Sheís his mum!
bob: So? Donít you?
ed: I donít want to hear this.
dave: Course I do! Wouldnít you?
chris: Ever done it?
alex: Jesus, of course he hasnít!
dave: My mum may have no secrets, but I do. And thatís one of Ďem.
last modified 29 October 2008