Date: Sun, 5 Aug 2001 13:56:34 +1000 From: Thomas Brooks <email@example.com> Subject: A love is never lost A LOVE IS NEVER LOST Thomas Brooks firstname.lastname@example.org I guess it all started when a boy aged ten moved into a house next door to mine. For reasons beyond me our neighbourhood never changed - I knew everyone and everyone knew me, and any change to our otherwise monotone lives was both exciting and somewhat unwelcome at the same time. I first found about our new neighbour from my mother who had helped the people move. She was all excited and could not wait to tell me that I now had a new friend to play with and that we would soon be introduced. From the first time I laid my eyes on him I knew we would be sworn enemies our entire lives. I was a stocky athletic type with black hair and blue eyes whilst he was a little taller then me but much skinnier with mousy coloured hair and green eyes. He wore different clothes and had a manner about him that made him stand out as an "outsider". Both our mothers fussed around and introduced us: "Max meet Tom, Tom this is Max...Max is also ten and I'm sure you will be the best of friends" No way!!!! I already had a best friend and there were plenty of other people I already knew at school. I guess making a new friend at that stage was just too much of a hassle. My mother, not picking up my telepathic messages, confused my silence for barely subdued and bubbly excitement - thereby I was nominated to be Max's tour guide. I thought that the day would never end; I had no idea what it was that I was meant to be showing to this boy so I found some friends and joined up with them. Max hung around for a while but because my friends and I made such a good effort of excluding him he soon left for home. Being a good neighbour I did not see him for the remainder of the summer. With the start of school the fun times ended and the slavery began. Instead of a ball and chain kids carried schoolbooks in back packs and instead of a worn striped prison garments we all looked alike in our slacks and white polo shirts. Although in contrast to the rest of the year the first day of school is always fun; I'm sure you remember catching up with friends who went away on holidays, seeing your new classmates - meeting the teacher you will torment. That was day I ran into Max for the second time. He was with a group of boys I hadn't seen much of over the summer, he was pretty chummy with them and they were laughing boyishly when I joined them... This, I guess, is where the boring intro ends and the actual story begins: One day on the basketball court not too far away from where I lived, Max challenged me to a game of one-on-one, I gladly accepted and we got under way. The game was intense and for a lengthy period we were point for point. By this time a group of the neighbourhood kids had gathered around to watch our little epic game of might. Just as we were both getting tired Max accidentally ran in to me and I ended up sprawled on my back right under the basket - he took a shot, the ball travelling through the hoop and on its downward journey knocking me square on the head. This as you can imagine invited roaring laughter from the spectators making my defeat and humiliation unbearable. I leaped to my feet yelling "You pushed me out of the way! That doesn't count you...you...cheat!" Max, quite averse to being called a cheat, began fiercely denying the allegations - coming out with little gems of his own like: "Not my fault you play like a girl" and "How could you see with a skirt over your head!" This, offcourse, was quite unacceptable and the only way to prove to him that not only was I not a girl but he was also a deplorable swindler was to beat him into submission. Sensing that the charged atmosphere will provide much excitement our `fans' formed a tight circle around us cheering and egging us on. Not wanting to disappoint the crowd Max leaped at me and knocked me right back to the ground where, according to him, `I belonged'. Personally I always had more brawl then brains and this came in handy when shifted my weight and rolled on top of my adversary with my knees either side of him pinning his body and hands to the ground. My hands were free to slap him around, torment him and generally get my revenge all to happy cheers of the lookers-on. I was triumphant. Just like the good guys in the cool movies - they get accused by the baddies and have to take the law into their own hands to prove their innocence. I was Clint Eastwood, Rocky and Sly Stallone all rolled into one - sitting on top of Maxs' small frame, looking forward to savouring this moment of victory and plunging him further into humiliation. Suddenly and without warning, just like Moses parted the Red Sea, my mother parted the small group of kids still clustered around us and assumed the parental pose with her hands on her hips and a frown on her brow. Having failed to show up at home for something or other she had come out looking for me - and here she was about to share my moment of glory. How proud she must feel seeing me like this. But to my disappointment my mother didn't come up with any clever insults for Max, instead she folded her strong fingers over my ear and dragged me out of the `rink' and towards a not too distant and bleak future in which I would no doubt be spanked and grounded. Without giving it much of a chance my mother made up her mind about being against physical violence. Unless offcourse I were to misbehave in which case my mom would forget about being a pacifist and would usually let a strap do the lecturing. Soon, teary eyed and rubbing my very sore arse, I was instructed to go next door and apologise to Max for my disgraceful behaviour. Apologise?! Apologise?! For being a hero? I bet Luke Skywalker never apologised when he won. I would also bet my weeks pocket money that Rocky never had to go to his opponents' house the next day and shake hands. Clint never called the dirty chief with `I know you tried to have me killed but sorry for punching you...' stupid explanation! I am not getting the respect I deserve damn it! So with like-minded thoughts, pouting like mad, I arrived on the porch of my arch nemesis to willingly humiliate and belittle myself. Answering the door Max was wearing nothing more than a pair of short boxer shorts and a black eye - fighting being the only sport where both losers and winners receive such trophies. Not wanting to make a big scene I kept my head low and mumbled my apologies slightly faster than a speeding bullet and abruptly turned to leave. `You can stay' sounded an unsure voice behind me. I turned around but with nothing to say I stood there looking at him feeling really dumb. Looking at Max but for the first time seeing him - I just kind of stared at him, and he stared back. He had the same look on his face as young fawns do when they reach out for the teat of a milk bottle. His big green eyes punctuated on one side by a darkish circle. His thin lips slightly parted exposing the caps of his front teeth. The small clusters of freckles around his nose made him look not unlike a little child lost at a train station knowing that his parents having forgotten about him are now far away. `What?' `Could you come in a minute - there's something I have to tell you' `I guess I could...' I mumbled still staring at him `...for a minute' He was home alone and as I shuffled into the hallway he gave me a kind of playful reassuring look as he lead the way up the stairs to his bedroom. You see I don't think that I was a bad kid, not un-kind, but stubborn and when set in my ways it would be hard for me to see the good side of a person when I convinced myself they were bad. Suddenly finding myself in Max's room, standing there intensely studying my shoes unsure of what was expected of me I felt a deep seeded guilt about the very first time we met. The way I ignored him and treated him with contempt. `Get spanked?' he asked - a sureness creeping into his tone now. `No!' `Yeah, me too...' I looked up to see if he had heard me I was greeted by a smile so wide and full it threatened to fall of his face. A knowing smile, honest, sincere and very contagious. I couldn't hold back a giggle. Then another and another as Max's smile grew even wider which a minute ago I would have thought impossible. Suddenly the hard bit was over. I no longer felt like I was in a threatening surrounding and I certainly no longer felt the need to plot a clever and cunning scheme to pay this kid back once and for all. Without apologies or attempted heartfelt remorse he put on some clothes, picked up a basketball and we ventured out... From that day onwards I felt like I was reunited with an old friend who I hadn't seen for a long time. I was bursting with things to tell him and places to show him - we had so much to do and such a little time to do it in. So, as if magnetised, we started spending all our free time together. When school got dull we would make spare time by skipping a class or two and instead teaching ourselves diving tricks down at the river. With summer around the corner we were inseparable. We liked the same movies, the same music, we laughed at the same jokes and we were both going to be rich when we grew up. We also promised to be friends when we grew up, best friends. Our favourite spot was by the lake in the shade of a million year old canopy of an oak tree. The lake was mostly deserted and we could spend hours swimming and mucking around without encountering anyone. It was on a hot and humid day when we were resting under the oak, water glistening on our bodies that Max decided that our friendship could grow into something more than it was even at that stage. `Do you like hanging out' he asked getting up off the grass and standing a little to the side of me. `Yeah, I love doing stuff together' `So you love me then?' I had heard that certain intonation in his voice when we dreamed of what our future would be like, if there were aliens or if we were aliens. It was no doubt a serious tone. `No!' I exclaimed raising my head to look at him. He was just standing there. I had no recollection of him moving or jumping around like kids do when they remove their underwear but there he was - standing next to his wet pile of shorts wearing nothing but the golden rays of the sun. I had seen him naked before and he had seen me. We were ten and were not bothered by things like that; but there was something different about this. Something in the way looked at me. Something different in the way he stood. Water in beads over his chest, more dripping from his wet hair. His stomach ballooning out slightly and flattening again as he took quick shallow breaths. His legs slightly parted, tanned thighs quivering slightly as a faint breeze dried the water from his skin. `What are you doing?' I asked in a removed way as my eyes continue to scan his body He said nothing until he was squatting next to me looking straight into my eyes. His face close enough for me to feel his hot breath, his body close enough for me to feel this, no doubt imaginary, electricity. `Take of your shorts...' `Why?' we were whispering for a reason other than our closeness. Instead of giving me a good reason he reached down with his hand to undo my drawstring. Only taking a brief glance downwards to guide his hand his eyes stayed locked on mine. They were an intense green, focused, almost predatory. `I want to see something' He moved his body from a squatting position onto his knees at my side. `C'mon I've taken mine off...' I didn't feel uncomfortable enough to push him away and race home but this was definitely strange. We did strange stuff before but nothing that involved our bodies. Giving him the benefit of the doubt I sat up, drew my knees up to my chest and awkwardly pulled my wet shorts over my butt and off onto the ground. Being in this position offered me a view of his dick that was now standing erect, like a tiny soldier standing at attention. `Do you get like this?' I jerked my head up only now realising that Max saw me notice his 2-inch pride. Now nose-to-nose with him I was blushing and lost for words. `I like you...' With his hand on my chest he pushed me gently backwards. I was lying flat on the ground looking up at tiny torn bits of sky snagged in the rich canopy of the oak tree. Still with nothing to say I allowed him to climb on top of me so that his slightly cold and wet bum was perched on my lower abdomen inches away from my own `soldier at attention'. With one hand on his dick the other on the ground next to my ear, bracing his body so that we were still nose-to-nose, still not breaking eye contact he leaned down and touched his lips to mine. I jolted - like a current flowing from my body and one from his collided on my still parted lips, conducted through this awkward kiss. `I love you' he whispered His soft words rebounding off my skin with a heat that seemed to spread from my face through my neck and then flood my body I felt my penis jerk and tighten as if an invisible hand had gripped it. `I...' My words were forced back into my mouth by his tongue and sealed by his lips that were pressed firmly against mine. I never got to finish that even after his lips left mine and began to work their way down my neck and onto my chest. Moving like he had done this before Max shifted his weight of his arm and moved backwards towards my feet. All the while his mouth was caressing my chest, then my stomach. As he moved backwards his butt brushed against the tip of my penis making it flex hard sending a small but curiously pleasant pain sensation back up my body. My butt cheeks flexed and the muscles in my legs tightened, I let out a soft groan as my body twisted slightly this way and that. His tongue working against my skin touching it so softly accompanied by his breath tickling me all the way down to my groin area. I lifted my head to see where he was up to - his head was poised, looking at my rock hard little pecker. He looked up at me and exhibited his award winning toothy grin that was too large for his face. With his fingers on the shaft of my dick his other hand on my testicles and his soft breath brushing the tip of my penis I let my head fall back and closed my eyes. Stroking my pecker he lowered his mouth over it and pressed his lips closed. A warm sensation, that must be experienced to be believed, raced through my body and up to my hazy brain ringing alarm bells. These bells getting louder and louder as he continued to stroke my shaft with his fingers whilst bobbing his head up and down on my dick. My body tensing and relaxing, muscles working in my legs and butt, now in my back. Contracting, relaxing contracting hard, relaxing slowly ready for another contraction - all this orchestrated by the soft touch of my best friend. `I...' I tried to speak but my words were caught in my throat as my muscles contracted. `I...' Again my muscles straining hard, and again. Again, tightening without releasing. `I...' `I...' `Arrrrgh!' I thought something had snapped or ripped inside me. My dick now convulsing hard and pushing nothing but air out of the piss hole. This incredible euphoric state suddenly washed over me as if by command of some magical wizard the lake swelled overflowing its banks and embraced my body. I suddenly had the urge to hug myself tight because I felt like I would drift away in an instant. Taken by the currents of the river or maybe blown away by the wind - I was dizzy with pleasure, excitement and something new - a strange sensation somewhere inside that seemed to be growing hotter and larger by the second. So hot and so large that it seemed like an entity taking over my body, making me surrender control to its will. It willed me to sit up. It willed me to ease Max onto his back and kneel next to his feet. It guided my hands onto his thighs, parting them. It willed my eyes to see his cock, signalling to me... Max's penis hard as lead, my mouth and tongue magnetised - drawing close to his groin. My hands moving almost on their own sliding up his legs and onto his hips. Then further up to his chest. There, on his chest palms flat, making circles over his pecks. Feeling the little bumps that are his hard nipples as my mouth closes over his dick and my tongue makes gentle contact with his shaft. My eyes are closed. I have not done this before. But the feel of his cock in my mouth, the texture of its skin, the taste of it is driving me insane. I can feel his heart beat through his throbbing shaft and my tongue starts feverishly licking around his head. I'm excited - I know Max is excited. English classes forgotten as he communicates in moans and groans. I know he wants more, he tells me with his body. Balancing on his shoulders and feet he raises his back and buttocks off the ground forcing his member deeper into my hot mouth. My hands slip off his chest and onto his back. I can feel him shaking ever so slightly. My fingers burning, probing, touching, sensing, moving down his back and to the top of his butt. I can feel his butt cheeks tightening to the rhythm of his penis throbbing in my mouth. I run my fingers lightly over his tight arse, then with more pressure. Now as my head bobs up and down I am groping his butt like a man at sea groping for the safety line. My hands are filled with him, I can not get enough when suddenly; his body, in a sudden thrust, raises higher and hangs for a split second before collapsing to the ground. A groan escapes him and I feel a hot soggy stream hit me in the back of the throat. Unexpected I pull back coughing, too late. The warm sticky stuff has slimed its way down my throat and into my stomach. It leaves salty taste in mouth that is pleasant. It's not like broccoli and its not like ice cream... Its like... Max. Max's head is up and he's looking at me quizzically. He laughs. I laugh too. We both laugh until our bellies hurt. Then we swim and soon, tired we both fell asleep under the oak tree. After that day I knew that I liked boys...This experience led me to where I am today. Max and I remained the very best of friends after that - we shared a lot, and after that day we shared a special bond. A bond that still remains even though Max is no longer here to enjoy and continue sharing in our...Love. Innocent and knowing no boundaries, the love of two boys with no cliches, peer pressure or taboo. A love that does not need to be announced out loud. It was ours, like a secret. Max and I were born in 1981 in the month of October he passed away in 1993. I miss him and regret that I had not met him earlier. If you have gotten this far I thank you, this story is a tribute to him and a reminder for me (and hopefully you) that there is something so special to life -- but precious moments can be fleeting. I was present when the headstone for his grave was chosen, because we were so close his mother asked me to write something special that could be engraved in the stone. "Seize the day" was my choice - a quote of a poet we studied at school whose name I have long forgotten. However the words will always be with me, as will the memories. Tom. P.S. The original version is the product of someone's imagination and not the genuine article that you have just read.