Date: Sun, 26 May 2002 23:09:19 -0600 From: firstname.lastname@example.org Subject: The Journey of John part 1 ******************************************************************************* The usual disclamer applies, so if you don't like sex of younger males, or are a younger male, please leave and don't read this. ******************************************************************************* The Journey of John Chapter 1: Discover As every junior high kid will tell you, 'school sucks' you can look at it whichever way you want but when you get right down to it there's nothing else to say. That's where this story begins, either with school sucking, or sucking at school... Now, my names John, I'm a grade eight student at Wilson Middle School in a fair sized town in Alberta. For all of you American readers, that's in Canada. I enjoyed life, I got okay grades, loved soccer, and pretty much was just happy. I grew up in Calgary, also in Alberta, but I was too young to remember it, so that doesn't really matter. I have green eyes, blonde hair, slight build (all my friends call me skinny), and dark skin. So, to start the story, I was sitting in English class listening to the drawl of lecture when I noticed him. Its not that I've never seen him before it's just that I saw him in a different way, you know. His name is Derek; he's always been in my English class. But all of a sudden the curve of his neck seemed different to me, his eyes dancing over the chalkboard intrigued me. If I didn't know better, I would think that I found Derek attractive. No, I can't think like that! I concentrated on learning for the rest of the day. When it came the blessed time of leaving I, like all other kids hurried to catch the bus. In my awkward teenage stumblings I stumbled upon Derek, knocking his and my books all over the ground outside. Now, this would have been an embarrassing thing to me usually. Instead I almost had a major heart attack; I had come into contact with a fallen angel. "Thanks, John," he grumble sarcastically, collecting his books. "Um... I'm sorry... can I help you?" I stammered inharmoniously. "No, that's fine, loser." Shot down on first contact, my little heart was broken before I even knew it could be. I hurried to collect my books off the ground, and as quickly as possible boarded my bus. Why the hell do things always have to work out so hard for me, why cant I get a break? I haven't even said a word to Derek in my entire life and the only thing that he can think to say to me is 'thanks loser'. That burns in a way that I can't even explain. I sat through the uninteresting bus ride home in quite thought about my new love, Derek. By the time my bus had reached my stop it was getting late. Around 4:30. So I hurried into the house to help my mom with dinner. Opening the door I hear a loud "hello?" coming for somewhere in the house. "Hello, it's me." I respond to my mothers call. I walked into my 3-bedroom bungalow; everything was where it should be. The largish living room to my left and the dining room and kitchen to my right. My mother, being an interior decorator, co-coordinated the entire house to match her "blue seagull" motif. It is kind of bland, after almost 13 years of looking at the same thing. We had lived in this house from the day I was born and, it has always looked exactly like this. Sure, we got a new T.V. 2 years ago but other than that, the house has looked exactly the same. I walked though the spacious living room and into my room, it is almost a perfect square with my bed up against the back wall. My dresser is on the wall right next to the door and my closet is on the wall to my left, same as usual. I chucked my backpack on the floor by my bed and headed to the kitchen to make myself a snack. Rooting through the cupboard I realize that we have no snacking foods, so I settle for a bag of soda crackers and head over to the computer to play a game. When the computer got boring I decided to go and take a quick shower to remove the grime of a day at school. Quickly undressing in the bathroom I examine myself in the mirror. My body is slightly muscular; my eyes are a soft shade of green flecked with a little blue. I weigh about 95lbs and am 5'4''. I have started to develop a small amount of hair around my cock but not enough for it to be a nuisance. My penis is about 5 and a half inches long, circumcised and sticks straight up when it's hard. I quickly showered and dressed in a pair of boxers and a tee shirt. Lazing the day around. * * * * * * The next morning I woke to the sound of birds chirping, grass being mowed, and the children next door playing outside. I sat up in bed, Saturday. Finally! A weekend to do whatever I want! I planned to go out with my best friend, Clay; we had been friends as long as I can remember. My mom told me that Christine, Clay's mother, used to bring him over when I was really little. Like one or two years old. I got out of bed and quickly dressed in a pair of shiny shorts and a Reebok tee shirt. I went downstairs to phone Clay. Ring, ring, "hello?" Someone says on the other end of the line. "Hi, is Clay there?" "Yes he is. Just let me go and get him," That must have been Clays mother, I hear her set the phone down an shout "CLAY THE PHONES FOR YOU!" 15 seconds later, "hello?" "Hey Clay, its John." "I know who it is stupid, whatcha' doing?" "Just hanging out, how's about we go down to the field and kick a ball around?" I asked. "Okay, when do you want to meet?" "Is 15 minutes okay?" "I'll be there, c'ya later." He responded. "Bye." Hanging up. My mother is never home on Saturday, it's usually her busiest day for decorating. So I just grabbed my soccer ball and headed to the soccer field. When I got to the large, green, public soccer field Clay hadn't shown up yet. While waiting I juggled the ball on my knees, a skill I had learned just last year and was trying to perfect. In a short while Clay showed up, "Hey man," I called to him. "Hey," He called back, "How's it goin'?" "Okay, how about you?" "Good, let's play!" That's my Clay, right to the point. He dove for the ball between my feet, but I twisted to the side and he ran into me instead. We both tumbled to the ground on top of each other. If I wasn't sure of my love of other boys before I am now, the effect of Clay's body on top of mine was overwhelming to say the least. In that split second of contact my cock was rock hard. What the hell is happening to me? I've never had this happen before, what does it mean? Clay extracted himself. "Sorry man," I don't respond. "Are you okay," he asks more urgently. "Yeah I'm fine, just kinda' queasy, I'm just gonna' sit down for awhile." An excuse to let my cock calm down. "Sure that's fine, I'll just wait here with you, are you gonna' be alright? Or am I going to have to phone an ambulance?" He responded jokingly. "No I think I'll be okay," I stood up after 'it' calmed down and we continued our soccer game. What exactly is happening to me, I thought as we played. Am I gay? Is that wrong? It sure feels good. I wonder if I can tell anyone? People will probably think I a pervert. All of these thought passed through my mind a thousand times throughout the soccer game. They even continued after we stopped and fell to the ground in exhaustion. "I'm too tired for another match," I exasperate to Clay. "Me too, let's sit and eat lunch." We walked over to my bag, where I packed our lunches for after the game. "What did you bring me John? Not bologna again I hope." "No this time I brought chicken breast sandwiches. I hope you like them." "I love chicken breast, how did you know?" He asked. "Oh, well maybe because we've know each other for like ever." "I guess." He stated as we dug into our lunch, he seemed to be really enjoying his sandwich. Is this a good time to tell him? Is ever a good time to tell him? Why do I have to tell anyone? I don't. So I just won't think about it anymore. It's probably just a phase; I'll get over this whole gay thing. Gay is a disease and I've never seen another gay person so how could I have caught it? I'm definitely not gay. "Whatcha' thinking about." "Being gay." Oh god! I let it slip, I've let the cat out of the bag, "like how do you end up gay. You have to catch it right?" Trying to cover my error. "Hell no! Besides if it was contagious I'd be gay, remember my Uncle Sam? He's gay. I haven't caught gay yet. My mom say's that it's something that you're born with." "Clay, can I ask you a question?" "Sure dude." He stated in his usual nonchalant manner. "If I told you that I was thinkin' I might be gay, would you hate me?" "No! Everyone thinks about it, some of us just think about it and realize that it is a possibility." "You said 'we'. What did you mean by that? Have you been thinking about the gay stuff too?" Even before the words left my mouth I hoped with all of my heart that he would say yes. I can't do this on my own, and who better to discover 'gay' with than Clay, we've been together for forever. "Well... maybe... but I don't want to talk about it now, let's go over to your house." "Okay." We walked to my house in almost total silence. The walk seemed to last forever. What is happening to me? Why am I breathing so fast? Why does the hair on the back of my neck tingle like it being electrocuted? So many questions and no answer! We got to my house, my mother won't be home until 5:00 and it's only 3:00 so Clay, without saying anything or even turning around to look up at me, heads in the direction of my room. I take off my shoes and follow him. When I get to the door he ushers me in, "You have no idea how long I've been looking for a person to talk about this with." He said, as he slowly closed the door behind him. To be continued... Please send any questions or comments to email@example.com the only way I'm going to write more in this series is if you tell me to!