Date: Sun, 25 May 2008 16:05:04 -0700 (PDT) From: Steven Saunders <email@example.com> Subject: Boxy Grove 3 Dammit! I was gonna get fired this time and I knew it. I was late coming back from lunch because of that damn boy. I knew I shouldn't have gone over there. His breath stank, the sex was terrible, and I just knew that I was covered in his cheap ass Jourdache cologne. He was gonna kill me this time. My phone vibrated with an incoming text message. I hesitated to look at it. Maybe if I didn't look at it and pretended to have not noticed it, I wouldn't get in as much trouble. Maybe. I was only a few blocks away. I would be there in five minutes. Five minutes. He might not even notice. And then I saw the car accident in front of me. It was blocking tha hell out of traffic. It was officially over for me. I sat in the long line of cars waiting for the jam to be cleared and almost cried. I was going to get fired. My phone vibrated again reminding me that I hadn't checked the text message. Slowly I reached for it as if it were going to explode when I opened it. <If you don't get your ass back here in ten minutes with that affidavit you're fired! I'm not bullshitting with you! Ten minutes!> *Oh damn!* I thought. I responded: <There's been an accident and its blocking all of Main St.> I hit send and prayed for the best of the worst. His response came almost instantly: <Then park and run yo ass here. Now!> I did as I was told. I never argued with him. Never. I was out of breath when I got to the courthouse two minutes later. He was standing outside the courtroom doors in his ever famous pose that aroused and intimidated me. Left hand in his pocket and cracking the knuckles in his right hand with his thumb. Oh yeah, I was attracted to my boss. Very much so. I handed him the manila folder and he calmly took it from me. The fact that he was calm scared me more than everything. He opened it up and raised one eyebrow as he looked it over. "Fine. Let's go" he said. We walked into the courtroom and I sat down on the side of the defense as he went to his desk. The judge was just coming in. "All rise." The bailiff said. "The Honorable Judge Judith Light presiding." "All parties present?" Judge Light asked. "Assistant District Attorney Hamilton Williams present" the prosecutor said. "Kourdell Brooks for the defense, Your Honor." My boss said. The judge looked up from her paperwork and smiled. She took off her glasses. "And how are you, Mr. Brooks?" "Doing well, Your Honor." He said. She shook her head. "I trust you'll make things interesting for us today?" "I'll do my best, Your Honor." "Let's get on to business then. ADA Williams, you have the floor." Williams threw a smirk in our direction. He and Kourdell were arch rivals in the courtroom. Williams lost to Kourdell every time they faced each other and on top of that, Williams hated gay men. Oh yeah, my boss is gay. Did I mention that I was seriously attracted to him? Williams went on this entire speech about how he would prove that our client was guilty beyond a shadow of a doubt and how DNA evidence placed him at the scene of the crime. He spoke for five minutes and then sat down. It was Kourdell's turn and this was the beautiful part. I started to pack my things. We were about to leave. "Ladies and Gentlemen of the jury, my client is innocent. I will prove this to you in less than ten minutes and you all can go back to enjoying your beautiful Monday morning." He returned to his side of the courtroom. "I object, Your Honor." Williams said. "Statements like that are misleading to the jury and therefore not acceptable in court. He's predisposing the jury to a verdict of Not Guilty." The judge looked at him. "Can you explain yourself, Mr. Brooks?" He smiled. "Of course, Your Honor." He opened the folder I just brought him. "I have here a signed affidavit from the crime lab technician working the case that the fingerprints found at the crime scene did not belong to my client. A mistake was made. The fingerprints belong to my client's brother. The file containing a comparison of the fingerprints is also here as a visual aid to Your Honor." I almost laughed out loud. It was over. "Objection!" yelled Williams. "I don't have this information." "It was forwarded to your office in a timely manner. It is not the fault of the Court nor the defense that your office assistants do not work as diligently as mine do." Kourdell raised his eyebrow and pointed at me. It made me feel damn important. Judge Light looked at the file in front of her and laughed. "You always keep things interesting, Mr. Brooks." She shook her head. "In light of these circumstances I have no choice but to dismiss the case. We're done here." She banged her gavel. We were in court for six and a half minutes. Williams glared at us as we left. I smiled. Kourdell and I were stopped by a media frenzy waiting outside. They all wanted a statement. He refused to give one. He was so modest. I loved it about him. A few people put microphones in my face and asked me how it felt to work behind the most successful defense attorney in the city. I wanted to tell them how it was extremely motivating. I wanted to say that I'm proud to work for the hottest, openly gay lawyer in the city. I didn't, though. I mirrored Kourdell's response of "No Comment." Kourdell ruined my warm, fuzzy feeling when we got in the Cadillac waiting to drive us away. He stared at me. "Who was he?" he asked. "I don't follow you sir." I said. "Don't bullshit me, Will. What was his goddamn name? Who were you fucking that made you late with my paperwork?" Oh shit. I should've known this was coming. "Uh, his name was Jay" Kourdell shook his head. "Well, you fuck him on your own time. I swear to God. You smell like drug store cologne. We're going to the office. Go clean up in the bathroom and change clothes. I know you still have that other outfit in your desk. We're going out." I made no objections. I never did. Never.